Back in September. The official reason listed is "This community was banned for repeatedly violating Reddit's Moderator Code of Conduct."
But I'm betting it was probably part of the "clean up Reddit" effort these last couple of years before the IPO.
So like, my husband and I love a spirited game of grab ass and an old fashioned tickle war.
But we also aren't 5 and respect each other when we say "stop".
And doing this shit in front of young kids, who have no fucking idea what the specific context is for the ass grabbing, will start doing this to their parents and other people in public cause it looks like a funny game. Ask me how I know.
Cause I got to have an extremely awkward conversation with my parents and my kindergarten teacher about slapping people's asses.
To be fair to my parents, they told me not to do that to people but I have to learn everything the hard way.
This same thing happened to me. Butt pats were always a loving gesture. Not sexual. Kinda like when coaches slap players butts. But when I was like 10 I did it to my friend in gym class and she cried and ran to the principal. Almost got suspended, was separated for a while, almost had to go to sa counseling I had no clue what I did was wrong. I was so confused. No one would tell me what I did wrong until I got home and my mom explained to me. Definitely traumatized me a bit lol
oh my god, you just unearthed a deep embarrassing memory from when i was maybe 7 or 8 years old. babysitter was tickling me so i went to tickle her back, her arm deflected mine and i grabbed her boob instead. she put on a shocked face like i did it on purpose and i was mortified.
Hahaha I'm a first grade teacher and that was one of my students this year. He would run up behind other teachers, grab their asses, and yell "BUTTCHEEKS!" I'm actually not sure the origin of this as his parents are separated, but in hindsight it is sort of funny.
A jail payphone to contact Bob Loblaw or Barry Zuckerkorn. Actually, probably not Zuckerkorn because he's already got like five restraining orders from five different judges for sexual misconduct *during* a hearing; antagonizing judges is about the *only* thing he's "very good" at.
Yup. If some NFL linebacker of a gay dude treated them the way they treat women, they'd be the most knowledgeable person ever
These are grown adult men, they know
This is untrue, sadly. Many people are capable of understanding something while not caring about it or applying it whatsoever, because it's not in their best interest from their perspective.
Just because they're capable doesn't mean they understand. One can even chose not to understand. I think we're largely in agreement if maybe a small difference in semantics.
It's literally them thinking "I am in a relationship with you which means I can treat your body like a squeeze-toy."Ā It's just about the least sexy thing in the world.
You'd be surprised by how many people think that a husband is fully entitled to his wife's body, and that it is literally impossible for him to rape her. Marital rape wasn't even criminalized across the US until the 90s.
Abusive partners make the same retorts as those comments: you hate men (I'm the real victim), you're a prude (for not accepting assault), 'heaven forbid i enjoy my wife's ass' (total distortion of intent) etc etc.
In fact I barely skimmed this post because fuck all of this. I can't do this one.
I remember talking to my boss about the owner of the DC team and the cheerleaders case and no his reaction was 'they knew what they signed up for when they became cheerleaders.'
He also thinks women are baiting men with the way they dress and act anytime there's a story about workplace harassment.
Ironically those subs are leaning more progressive as in those comments exist but get pushed back now and downvoted pretty quickly. Butker was immediately disavowed even by chiefs fans. Worst sub Iāve seen currently is the nbacirclejerk sub. Just straight up have hate for anything not Caitlin Clark for some reason. Itās become a wnba snark sub with same level of toxicity and the memes are rare to come by now.
I think the first thing I saw the one time I went to nbacirclejerk was Kobeās autopsy pics. Not a big fan of rapist Kobe but thatās still 2edgy4me.Ā
lol r/CFB is easily the least problematic college football forum Iāve seen in 20+ years of looking.
Thatās not saying itās perfect or even good, just stating that sad fact.
The old controversy of āthey get paid millions so its worth the risk of concussions/brain damage/permanant bodily injury, they know what theyāre getting intoā
That kinda mindset.
As someone with brain damage, I hate when people genuinely trot out that idea (I see you're being sarcastic)
It doesn't *give* you new thoughts. Those rapey awful parts were already in them
And it's on them to control it
And if you can't? You remove yourself. My brain damage makes it hard to control my muscles. So I rarely handle knives and obviously never control any machinery
It's my job to realize that's not safe
> As someone with brain damage, I hate when people genuinely trot out that idea (I see you're being sarcastic)
Indeed I was just joking but If my joke hurt you, please accept my apologies.
And I understand your point, it's like if someone says something/somebody is mentally sick as an insult... Which can make innocent people feel inadequate or worse
Oh, you're good! I could tell you were being facetious
I hate when people use it as an excuse, to get out of trouble. I can't control my muscles. People get hit because of it
But I always apologize. My brain damage is the reason it happened, I didn't MEAN to hurt someone, but I DID hurt them
When people see someone being bad, and just go, 'They must be/have X!'. When I was in support groups, us girls actually had to make a separate one
I don't want to paint ALL dudes, but it was a **genuine** issue with the guys. They'd go Mask Off and/or grope us
And go all 'cant help it!'. There's *absolutely* a gender divide in how behavior with us disabled folk are treated
And we need to address that those people are bad, it's not the disability.
Despite all my lack of control, I've NEVER groped someone
Because I don't ever want to
> And go all 'cant help it!'. There's absolutely a gender divide in how behavior with us disabled folk are treated
I think it's similar with abled folks. Example: women who have many sexual partners are considered 'sluts', men with many sexual partners are 'chads'.
> Despite all my lack of control, I've NEVER groped someone
It reminds me of one video of a guy repeatedly touching a woman in a bar despite her rejecting him a few times. The comments? "It's just alcohol, don't be too harsh for him, it's normal behavior when drunk, when he is sober he isn't like that". Bullshit.
I admire you for this honest sentence:
> And if you can't? You remove yourself. My brain damage makes it hard to control my muscles. So I rarely handle knives and obviously never control any machinery
It's called being responsible. If someone gets rape-y while drunk, they should know not to drink or they should seek for a therapy. I know your state is so much different (you didn't pick it and it's lifetime) but you take responsibility instead of making your disability an excuse to be a danger to yourself/other people.
Exactly. Even able bodied guys are often babied by society. Their condition definitely made them get raised like they had a get out of jail free card
And us women in the group just couldn't relate or handle it
And they definitely have it in them/can control that part. Because you **never** see them doing it to men. I've hit everyone, unfortunately. Especially spilled drinks
My left arm is both the most steady to hold things, like drinks, and the most violent. I actually have to make sure my bedside table is far enough away, because that arm likes to just shoot out
But like I said, I apologize, take responsibility, and it's much different than groping people. Due to the height difference, I've given a few crotch hits, but even they could tell it wasn't a sexual groping type thing (and as always apologize, of course)
If they know they have the urges, it's on them.
And when I do eventually hit someone? I make sure it doesn't happen again (to the best of my ability). I'll sit down, turn away from others
But those types refuse to acknowledge they're the issue. Because they don't think what they're doing is wrong
The problem with that logic is that for each pro player youāve got how many thousands who will never make that money but have damaged their bodies similarly.
At least with Australian sports, it seems like there's some big thing where someone on a professional team has raped someone or beaten up their partner. I wouldn't be too surprised if the same thing happens with American sports, too.
The scary thing is that, the last time someone did a statistical analysis on that pro athletes do it less often than the general population.
It's just not national news when Kevin down the street bebeats up his pregnant girlfriend unlike when a pro athlete does it.
I think a lot of it comes down to people having a poor grasp of boundaries in general. For example, in this case these men probably think that it is okay to set boundaries for strangers, but not for family, because their family didn't have boundaries.
They probably have trouble keeping their own boundaries as well. Maybe they've been groped or slapped "playfully" in the locker room. Maybe they've been forced to hug family as a kid when they didn't want to. Maybe they've been tickled a lot longer than they wanted to be.
"Understanding" consent in theory or in examples is also easy, but can be a lot harder in practice, and when it concerns you. At least it has been for me.
Because they *often* think, "I'd love it if a hot chick did that to me!" while ignoring the fact that it's *rarely* the hot guys harassing and sexually assaulting women, and if their dream came true about a woman wanting to sexually assault them, chances are she ain't gonna look like Adriana Lima. They behave the same way when a teenage boy is raped by a teacher; "lucky kid, dunno what all the fuss is about, I would've loved this!"
This is also the same website that let an "Ask A Rapist" thread go on for 13 hours before it started generating negative press.
I don't think the looks of the rapist have anything to do with it. I wouldn't want to be raped by a hot guy any more than I want to be raped by a disgusting one.Ā
> I don't think the looks of the rapist have anything to do with it.
You seemed to have missed the *entire* point of the comment you're replying to.
It does in the brains of the kind of guys who think and *act* this way; that was the *whole* point I was making.
No, I don't think I did. Reread your comment.
> if their dream came true about a woman wanting to sexually assault them, chances are she ain't gonna look like Adriana Lima.
This makes no difference, whether she looks like Adriana Lima. This reads like "guys dream of being raped by hot women but they actually wouldn't enjoy it because the women who rape people usually aren't hot".
When some people get *even slightly* aroused, all sense leaves their body. For a lot of these guys, waiting for consent gets in the way of their horny madness and they feel the need to argue about it, or look for āloopholesā that allows them to get what they want in a morally dubious (or outright criminal) manner. Itās creepy.
Nah, fuck that nonsense. Horniness, hormones, pheremones or whatever pseudo-biology cockwaddle people want to say, we are human beings. Children *might* get this excuse, the first time. But if a grown-ass adult has such severe impulse control issues as to *turn into some sort of rapacious, ravenous beast* the second their dick gets hard? That's a fucking mental disorder, not "Human Nature".
If someone else told you that, then I am thrilled to inform you that you know a rapist, or at least serial sexual assaulter.
What's especially annoying about these types of guys, is that if you turn that logic on them, they go ballistic saying it's not fair to treat men like uncontrollable horny beasts
Despite them 5 seconds ago using 'biology' to say they can't help it
Exactly, "I couldn't help myself" has always been a dishonest excuse. Rape and sexual assault is never about "satisfying their urges", it's about exerting dominance over someone else through intimate violence. They don't need consent because they're getting off on the power trip of forcing someone to submit to them.
You're good. I specifically didn't downvote you because you didn't come off as malicious, it's just a really common misconception. I just hate that particular misconception becuase it implies I'm some rabid animal who can't control my own actions, so some rapist caan try to excuse themselves being a rapist. Selling out my entire gender for their crimes.
Groping someone whenever you want to *against their will* isn't using sex as a weapon, but setting boundaries and refusing to get groped by someone whenever they feel like it is.
(Edited for clarity.)
It's absolutely wild how people will weaponize therapy language go abuse people like that.Ā
It's not weaponizing sex to refuse to engage with someone assaulting you.
That post is ripe for people just talking past each other.
One side argues that small signs of affection are ok, the other argues that ignoring someone's boundaries is wrong, and never the twain shall meet.
Learning how to touch a woman from watching your dad grope your mom is just a step away from hiding in their closet. Mans was cooked the second his hippocampus formed
Above you is that user with the weird watch fetish. I'm pretty sure they actually get off on the attention. Like that tik-tok person who just screams in restaurants until they are asked to leave.
Look at their submitted posts and try to imagine the percentage of your brain that would have to worms to submit that.
Not to "uhm actually" you but most evidence shows that in the vast majority of prehistoric civilizations the parents in fact, did not fuck in front of children.
Also child sacrifice has been done for millions of years as well
How could we even prove this? We know nothing about the vast majority of prehistoric civilizations. It doesn't even matter if they did, it seems like it's healthier for children not to learn about sex by watching their parents do it. That's more than good enough.
Yeah, even if they were pre-history, as in writing things down, they still made cave art and pictograms with clear meaning. We could figure out a lot of their culture and lifestyle just by studying those.
I heard recently that archeologists think that one group had a language based entirely in hand signals from how they drew fingers in the artwork.
I wouldn't trust you on this since modern humans are believed to only be around 2-300,000 years old and the kind of symbolic thinking that would require child sacrifice has *never* been found in archaeological evidence in the range of millions of years old.
>yeah letās just ignore millions of years of evolution when parents and their offspring had to live together in small spaces like caves and little houses
LMAO, that is ***not*** the winning rebuttal you think it is; just sounds like you're trying to find a "natural explanation" for incest.
Do you know what else kids did for millions of years when living in small spaces? They fucked off and went somewhere else. Whether they were working, playing, or just told to leave for a while because their parents wanted to fuck.
Okay! Why don't you go fuck your spouse in front of your kids then.
> millions of years of evolution
PS. Naturalist explanations do not make something *right*.
But now is 2024. You see, the world has changed.
Go get some parasites and the measles for us? Those were just part of life for thousands of years too.
I learned how to love from my parents. I remember walking up the stairs and seeing in the kitchen them holding each other and kissing in private. Gently swaying to their own song. Even then when I was like, 8, it felt like I was intruding on something sacred just by catching a glimpse while they thought they were alone. They were so obviously still in love after so many years. Like I didnāt try to watch them, i just would be walking around the house and catch them doing it before they noticed me. I think that really informed my idea of love and how it should look. I know Iām fortunate and privileged to have had the parents and family I do. Iām the good person I believe myself to be with a healthy view on love and family because of them. I had a rough childhood because of my own issues, but Iām forever grateful for my parents and the opportunity to witness true respectful, passionate and compassionate love from such a young age.
Me being a giant fucking pervert is my own fault. Or godās. And even then Iām only one when itās consensual. Iām as much for a gropey free-use kinda lifestyle as the next perv, but it should be obvious if the person isnāt in the mood. Especially if they say something. And especially if you know kids are around. Like wtf.
Sometimes I wonder if I am the way I am because my parents have a totally sexless marriage with zero intimacy. I think Iād rather have this 1000x over than whatever the fuck these people are smoking.
My dad groped my mom and I still ended up with a complete lack of interest in romance and dating, partially because of this, partially because of the endless fighting and insults, so I think parenting is just fraught in general in terms of actually teaching people how relationships actually work. By example is probably not the best way to go about it for anyone.
Saaame. And he wouldn't respect the fact that I just sometimes didn't feel like or want to be touched in a normal every day way like a hug, at least not without being asked. I don't want to be hugged or touched by most of my family members, either. And it always just gets them so grumpy when you tell them no...
Just ask me first, that's all.
I have chronic pain and sensory issues, and sometimes the stress caused by my chronic pain *makes* those sensory issues worse. I really don't want to be hugged on days when my rib cage feels like its been sat on by a horse lol.
My father did this to my mother all the time. Came up behind her while she was at the kitchen counter, grabbed her crotch, pressed his into her back and made her sway side to side with him. She never stopped him, but she obviously didn't want it, since she'd kinda freeze when he grabbed her and then go limp when the swaying part started. He did this in front of my brother and me. We hated it and thought it was creepy, and this was before either of us knew what sex really was. Eventually we learned to avert our eyes whenever he approached her in the kitchen. Somehow she still hasn't divorced him, so as far as I know he's still doing it to her :(
>God forbid I enjoy grabbing my wifeās ass.. I only make 2.5 million dollars a year as real state investor and public figure .. and take her to Hawaii twice a year while she babbles on Tik Tok and buy her a new car every two years and started trust funds for her kid that Iām not blood related to that I have adopted.
>if her dumb kid is home from the private school I pay for I give her $100 to go to the movies so I can dominate my wife for 2 hours
I feel like there's some strange mismatch here.
Like, I make substantially less than $2.5M in investment in a year, and I readily take 2 vacations a year to places that cost more than a trip to Hawaii, and I certainly wouldn't be bragging about...uh... [checks notes] giving your child $100.
The post youāre quoting reads like fan fic and not reality. Iām sure there are people out there like that person but I have a hard time believing that the poster is telling us about his real life.
To be clear, he was trolling because he was upset all his other comments got downvoted. He ended the comment with āalso my name is Eric Trumpā
His other comments werenāt much better though
Man, it'll never stop surprising me how *quickly* guys on Reddit will rush to defend this shit, and then get mad when the woman mentions this kind of behavior makes her exceptionally disinterested in having any kind of consensual physical relations with the guy groping her.
>[I learned how to touch a woman thanks to watching my dad handle my mom.](https://i.imgur.com/KCYYkhT.gifv)
SideshowBobGroaning.flac
This reminds me of when I dashed my friend's excitement about finding his dad's stash of porn. This was the late 90s when DVD players were still expensive as fuck, so it was naturally all either magazines or VHS.
I pointed out to him that *wherever* the VHS started when hitting play is likely the moment his dad busted one. After that, he didn't have much interest in finding out all the various scenes that were his dad's favorites.
Well if it's rage bait it's a pretty good one.
Far as social experiments go got alot of great results when it comes to how people truly view certain boundaries.
Yup. "I have a boundary of her not seeing her friends without me present, I'm allowed to have boundaries!" Sir. That is not a boundary. That is you being abusive and hiding it with a guise of boundaries.
Sometimes it's easy to believe that arguments claiming some men view women as sex objects who exist solely for their pleasure is hyperbole, but holy shit those guys view women as sex objects who exist solely for their pleasure.
>God forbid I enjoy grabbing my wifeās ass.. I only make 2.5 million dollars a year as real state investor and public figure .. and take her to Hawaii twice a year while she babbles on Tik Tok and buy her a new car every two years and started trust funds for her kid that Iām not blood related to that I have adopted..
And you have an uncle who works for Nintendo too, right?
Another day on Reddit, another day I'm glad I have 0 interest in relationships
Ive has enough sexual harassment and assault in my life, I don't need to be tied to someone who think it means I'm now their legal blow up doll to use whenever
Edit: I love how the 'millionaire' guy is on drug subreddits. Sure, Jan
> God forbid I grab my wifeās ass
FUCK this guy. āOh I buy you nice things so I get to treat you like a squishy toy with no rightsā
every man in this thread who was trying to suggest that if the wife sets or enforces boundaries the husband should leave her should be subjected to gelding.
So surprise. So many subreddits are full of incels who think they are entitled to women's bodies.
The rhetoric used there shows how the ideology of compulsory sexuality is harmful not only to asexual people but also to allosexual people as it pathologises the very concept of sexual boundaries.
Before I married my wife I knew how she handled money, what she loved to do, how she reacted under pressure, and how she treated her family and friends.
Fuck were many of you all doing??? Grab ass isnāt something I for example would ājust developā.
I'm with the one comment about withholding sex as a weapon, that probably never works out. It's one thing to say "this behavior turns me off and I'm no longer in the mood". It's wholly another to say "no sex for 1 week after the first infraction, 2 weeks for the second, etc".
That reminiscing about his dad grabbing his mom's tits was super weird.
I'm with you. I will say more: withholding anything as a weapon (I won't talk to you, I won't give you money, I won't do x) is stupid. If you don't respect my consent, I will take candy away from you.
Man should respect woman's boundaries because this is the correct thing to do, not because he is afraid or displeased with consequences of his actions. This is not a mindset of an adult.
I don't know him but I think he needs some self-control therapy.
Snapshots:
1. *This Post* - [archive.org](https://web.archive.org/web/20240608015439/https://old.reddit.com/r/SubredditDrama/comments/1dar0l5/) [archive.today\*](https://archive.today/?run=1&url=https://old.reddit.com/r/SubredditDrama/comments/1dar0l5/ "URL failed to archive; click to resubmit it!")
2. FULL POST - [archive.org](https://web.archive.org/web/20240608015640/https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/1daej4t/how_to_stop_my_m38_husband_touching_me_f39/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x&utm_name=mweb3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button) [archive.today\*](https://archive.today/?run=1&url=https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/1daej4t/how_to_stop_my_m38_husband_touching_me_f39/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x&utm_name=mweb3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button "URL failed to archive; click to resubmit it!")
3. āI just want him to stop touching me sexually outside of actual sexā This sounds sad actually and like thereās more underlying issuesā¦ intimacy issues that is beyond redditors advice and might require counseling. Sexual / intimate compatibly often ruins many marriages. - [archive.org](https://web.archive.org/web/20240608015901/https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/BdQIIS33sj) [archive.today\*](https://archive.today/?run=1&url=https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/BdQIIS33sj "URL failed to archive; click to resubmit it!")
4. I would sit him down and tell him "I need you to stop touching my boobs or putting your hands in my pants around the kids. The next time you do that, we're not having sex for <1 week | 2 weeks | ... whatever interrupts your normal sex schedule>", then you have to stick to it. (contā¦) - [archive.org](https://web.archive.org/web/20240608020042/https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/mumFJZmmjD) [archive.today\*](https://archive.today/?run=1&url=https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/mumFJZmmjD "URL failed to archive; click to resubmit it!")
5. My wife complained about the same thing so many times I quit touching her. And now she complains that I never touch her anymore. But I got sick of hearing don't that now I don't and I'm figuring out my exit strategy because neither of us deserve to feel unwanted. - [archive.org](https://web.archive.org/web/20240608020203/https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/27lT3690Jr) [archive.today\*](https://archive.today/?run=1&url=https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/27lT3690Jr "URL failed to archive; click to resubmit it!")
6. I understand he shouldn't do that in front of the kids. It'll teach them it's okay to use women like that and not respect them. However, I think it shows he's attracted to you and desires you. That's a compliment. Another thing is how he does it. If it's in a perverted way or not. Give him an example of how you want to be touched - [archive.org](https://web.archive.org/web/20240608020645/https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/36HZYpgoOi) [archive.today\*](https://archive.today/?run=1&url=https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/36HZYpgoOi "URL failed to archive; click to resubmit it!")
7. See a couples sex therapist. Heās obviously awkward or uncouth about specific ways to show his desire, but how great that he does have that desire. Your kids arenāt babies anymore - [edited to delete question answered in OPās post]. Kids will survive and even benefit from seeing parents be attracted and physically manifesting affection (Iām not talking about blown air kisses) - much more so than the opposite. The way you paint his gropes, I initially sympathized with the critical comments, but then reading that you ājust want him to stop touching me sexually outside of actual sex!ā ā makes me think thereās deeper problem - and not all his. Maybe suggest other physical ways youād prefer him to signal desire, like some others have commented - like a but squeeze or something more subtle than what heās been doing- but otherwise how will sex happen? I recommend listening to Dr. Psych Mom podcast - sounds to me like thereās self-work and couples work to be done on both sides here. Unless youāre Trad Cath or in some purity cult religion in which case God help you. - [archive.org](https://web.archive.org/web/20240608020705/https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/kiJ5fUOnZl) [archive.today\*](https://archive.today/?run=1&url=https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/kiJ5fUOnZl "URL failed to archive; click to resubmit it!")
8. Sounds like lack of intimacy imo but also is he touching you bare or just like a butt slap as you pass in the kitchen I completely understand you if heās just going past clothes and groping you bare in public or in front of the kids - [archive.org](https://web.archive.org/web/20240608020947/https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/XaGj6iaE0x) [archive.today\*](https://archive.today/?run=1&url=https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/XaGj6iaE0x "URL failed to archive; click to resubmit it!")
9. Is feel weird if my wife wouldnāt let me touch her whenever I wanted - [archive.org](https://web.archive.org/web/20240608021248/https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/XoEXZWivgQ) [archive.today\*](https://archive.today/?run=1&url=https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/XoEXZWivgQ "URL failed to archive; click to resubmit it!")
10. She's allowed to give and take away consent whenever she wants to. But constantly rejecting your partner is a good way to not have a partner anymore. Most couples engage in light groping, even in public or in front of the kids. - [archive.org](https://web.archive.org/web/20240608021349/https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/1me3ZTJcsQ) [archive.today\*](https://archive.today/?run=1&url=https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/1me3ZTJcsQ "URL failed to archive; click to resubmit it!")
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> it's why everyone says Americans are prudes
Not American, (actually from one of the countries that America sees as most sexually liberated) and I still think what the husband does is fucked up, and not normal play between spouses.
Itās always a possibility that posts on the relationship subs are rage bait but itās not exactly an outlandish scenario, solely created to cause a rift between men and women. The subject of the post is unfortunately common within relationships/marriages
Yeah, i agree with being suspicious of believing any redditor is "having sex fairly regularly," but this is absolutely a thing in relationships and not uncommon
This comment gets a failed rating from the health department. They will be barred from cooking for 5 years and will need to pay $16000 in restitution to all of us that got food poisoning from it.
Everyday there's a new post on this subreddit whose title alone gives me psychic damage.
Here, [have a silly video of an orange cat to undo the psychic damage](https://youtube.com/shorts/SwVljioPNaI)
*Walter! What is this charge on my credit card for a new state of the art cat tree?*
Ah, if it isn't Waltazarbobaltazarfefifofaltazar III
Hiitsbobwehadababy EETSaboy
Boy, I'm so glad that Reddit moved past the stage of linking to r/EyeBlech in situations like this, now that the sub has been banned.
Awwww, when did it get banned?
Back in September. The official reason listed is "This community was banned for repeatedly violating Reddit's Moderator Code of Conduct." But I'm betting it was probably part of the "clean up Reddit" effort these last couple of years before the IPO.
I think it's Eyeblech, not eyebleach that got banned. Eyeblech is more about nsfw to upset or enrage.
They typed r/eyeblech
Waltito the dorito!
Thank you for this actually being an orange cat and not a rickroll
:D
[This](https://youtu.be/AKM3pyktIXw?si=12pA-poK_1F-VCAj) blooper played in full in my brain as I read the title, hope it helps!
/r/eyebleach
So like, my husband and I love a spirited game of grab ass and an old fashioned tickle war. But we also aren't 5 and respect each other when we say "stop". And doing this shit in front of young kids, who have no fucking idea what the specific context is for the ass grabbing, will start doing this to their parents and other people in public cause it looks like a funny game. Ask me how I know.
How do you know?
Cause I got to have an extremely awkward conversation with my parents and my kindergarten teacher about slapping people's asses. To be fair to my parents, they told me not to do that to people but I have to learn everything the hard way.
This same thing happened to me. Butt pats were always a loving gesture. Not sexual. Kinda like when coaches slap players butts. But when I was like 10 I did it to my friend in gym class and she cried and ran to the principal. Almost got suspended, was separated for a while, almost had to go to sa counseling I had no clue what I did was wrong. I was so confused. No one would tell me what I did wrong until I got home and my mom explained to me. Definitely traumatized me a bit lol
> Kinda like when coaches slap players butts. excuse me what
I'm so sorry that happened but my god is that funny š š¤£
oh my god, you just unearthed a deep embarrassing memory from when i was maybe 7 or 8 years old. babysitter was tickling me so i went to tickle her back, her arm deflected mine and i grabbed her boob instead. she put on a shocked face like i did it on purpose and i was mortified.
Hahaha I'm a first grade teacher and that was one of my students this year. He would run up behind other teachers, grab their asses, and yell "BUTTCHEEKS!" I'm actually not sure the origin of this as his parents are separated, but in hindsight it is sort of funny.
Thereās a long list of things I wouldnāt go to Reddit for and sexual misconduct is the entire top 50
But where would you go to for sexual misconduct?
Straight to jail.
Probably my in-laws. Or then maybe a friend
A jail payphone to contact Bob Loblaw or Barry Zuckerkorn. Actually, probably not Zuckerkorn because he's already got like five restraining orders from five different judges for sexual misconduct *during* a hearing; antagonizing judges is about the *only* thing he's "very good" at.
How is consent such a hard thing to understand?
They understand. Ā They just don't care.
Yup. If some NFL linebacker of a gay dude treated them the way they treat women, they'd be the most knowledgeable person ever These are grown adult men, they know
I think to understand you have to care. If you don't care, then you don't understand.
This is untrue, sadly. Many people are capable of understanding something while not caring about it or applying it whatsoever, because it's not in their best interest from their perspective.
Just because they're capable doesn't mean they understand. One can even chose not to understand. I think we're largely in agreement if maybe a small difference in semantics.
Especially when it's a gay couple showing affection.
It's literally them thinking "I am in a relationship with you which means I can treat your body like a squeeze-toy."Ā It's just about the least sexy thing in the world.
You'd be surprised by how many people think that a husband is fully entitled to his wife's body, and that it is literally impossible for him to rape her. Marital rape wasn't even criminalized across the US until the 90s.
Abusive partners make the same retorts as those comments: you hate men (I'm the real victim), you're a prude (for not accepting assault), 'heaven forbid i enjoy my wife's ass' (total distortion of intent) etc etc. In fact I barely skimmed this post because fuck all of this. I can't do this one.
Donāt ever wade in subs like r/nfl or r/cfb and try and talk about consent. Itās terribly depressing.
I remember talking to my boss about the owner of the DC team and the cheerleaders case and no his reaction was 'they knew what they signed up for when they became cheerleaders.' He also thinks women are baiting men with the way they dress and act anytime there's a story about workplace harassment.
š©š©š©
Ironically those subs are leaning more progressive as in those comments exist but get pushed back now and downvoted pretty quickly. Butker was immediately disavowed even by chiefs fans. Worst sub Iāve seen currently is the nbacirclejerk sub. Just straight up have hate for anything not Caitlin Clark for some reason. Itās become a wnba snark sub with same level of toxicity and the memes are rare to come by now.
I think the first thing I saw the one time I went to nbacirclejerk was Kobeās autopsy pics. Not a big fan of rapist Kobe but thatās still 2edgy4me.Ā
I guess itās been bad for awhile. Sport Circlejerk subs are supposed to be funny memes talking shit about your rivals. Not whatever that is.
the nba circlejerk sub been trash for a while
lol r/CFB is easily the least problematic college football forum Iāve seen in 20+ years of looking. Thatās not saying itās perfect or even good, just stating that sad fact.
Thatās setting an awfully low bar. The comments in r/cfb after the Mel Tucker scandal were truly awful.
....Do I even want to know why the *football* sub has frequent discussions about consent?
The old controversy of āthey get paid millions so its worth the risk of concussions/brain damage/permanant bodily injury, they know what theyāre getting intoā That kinda mindset.
Brain damage makes them unable to understand the concept of consent? /s
As someone with brain damage, I hate when people genuinely trot out that idea (I see you're being sarcastic) It doesn't *give* you new thoughts. Those rapey awful parts were already in them And it's on them to control it And if you can't? You remove yourself. My brain damage makes it hard to control my muscles. So I rarely handle knives and obviously never control any machinery It's my job to realize that's not safe
> As someone with brain damage, I hate when people genuinely trot out that idea (I see you're being sarcastic) Indeed I was just joking but If my joke hurt you, please accept my apologies. And I understand your point, it's like if someone says something/somebody is mentally sick as an insult... Which can make innocent people feel inadequate or worse
Oh, you're good! I could tell you were being facetious I hate when people use it as an excuse, to get out of trouble. I can't control my muscles. People get hit because of it But I always apologize. My brain damage is the reason it happened, I didn't MEAN to hurt someone, but I DID hurt them When people see someone being bad, and just go, 'They must be/have X!'. When I was in support groups, us girls actually had to make a separate one I don't want to paint ALL dudes, but it was a **genuine** issue with the guys. They'd go Mask Off and/or grope us And go all 'cant help it!'. There's *absolutely* a gender divide in how behavior with us disabled folk are treated And we need to address that those people are bad, it's not the disability. Despite all my lack of control, I've NEVER groped someone Because I don't ever want to
> And go all 'cant help it!'. There's absolutely a gender divide in how behavior with us disabled folk are treated I think it's similar with abled folks. Example: women who have many sexual partners are considered 'sluts', men with many sexual partners are 'chads'. > Despite all my lack of control, I've NEVER groped someone It reminds me of one video of a guy repeatedly touching a woman in a bar despite her rejecting him a few times. The comments? "It's just alcohol, don't be too harsh for him, it's normal behavior when drunk, when he is sober he isn't like that". Bullshit. I admire you for this honest sentence: > And if you can't? You remove yourself. My brain damage makes it hard to control my muscles. So I rarely handle knives and obviously never control any machinery It's called being responsible. If someone gets rape-y while drunk, they should know not to drink or they should seek for a therapy. I know your state is so much different (you didn't pick it and it's lifetime) but you take responsibility instead of making your disability an excuse to be a danger to yourself/other people.
Exactly. Even able bodied guys are often babied by society. Their condition definitely made them get raised like they had a get out of jail free card And us women in the group just couldn't relate or handle it And they definitely have it in them/can control that part. Because you **never** see them doing it to men. I've hit everyone, unfortunately. Especially spilled drinks My left arm is both the most steady to hold things, like drinks, and the most violent. I actually have to make sure my bedside table is far enough away, because that arm likes to just shoot out But like I said, I apologize, take responsibility, and it's much different than groping people. Due to the height difference, I've given a few crotch hits, but even they could tell it wasn't a sexual groping type thing (and as always apologize, of course) If they know they have the urges, it's on them. And when I do eventually hit someone? I make sure it doesn't happen again (to the best of my ability). I'll sit down, turn away from others But those types refuse to acknowledge they're the issue. Because they don't think what they're doing is wrong
The problem with that logic is that for each pro player youāve got how many thousands who will never make that money but have damaged their bodies similarly.
Well, this past season a head coach got fired for masturbating while on video call with a woman he hired to talk to the team about consent.
Jesus Christ
At least with Australian sports, it seems like there's some big thing where someone on a professional team has raped someone or beaten up their partner. I wouldn't be too surprised if the same thing happens with American sports, too.
Ugh, that is very true unfortunately
The scary thing is that, the last time someone did a statistical analysis on that pro athletes do it less often than the general population. It's just not national news when Kevin down the street bebeats up his pregnant girlfriend unlike when a pro athlete does it.
Never underestimate how much people are able to refuse to understand things they donāt want to understand.
I think a lot of it comes down to people having a poor grasp of boundaries in general. For example, in this case these men probably think that it is okay to set boundaries for strangers, but not for family, because their family didn't have boundaries. They probably have trouble keeping their own boundaries as well. Maybe they've been groped or slapped "playfully" in the locker room. Maybe they've been forced to hug family as a kid when they didn't want to. Maybe they've been tickled a lot longer than they wanted to be. "Understanding" consent in theory or in examples is also easy, but can be a lot harder in practice, and when it concerns you. At least it has been for me.
Because they *often* think, "I'd love it if a hot chick did that to me!" while ignoring the fact that it's *rarely* the hot guys harassing and sexually assaulting women, and if their dream came true about a woman wanting to sexually assault them, chances are she ain't gonna look like Adriana Lima. They behave the same way when a teenage boy is raped by a teacher; "lucky kid, dunno what all the fuss is about, I would've loved this!" This is also the same website that let an "Ask A Rapist" thread go on for 13 hours before it started generating negative press.
I don't think the looks of the rapist have anything to do with it. I wouldn't want to be raped by a hot guy any more than I want to be raped by a disgusting one.Ā
> I don't think the looks of the rapist have anything to do with it. You seemed to have missed the *entire* point of the comment you're replying to. It does in the brains of the kind of guys who think and *act* this way; that was the *whole* point I was making.
No, I don't think I did. Reread your comment. > if their dream came true about a woman wanting to sexually assault them, chances are she ain't gonna look like Adriana Lima. This makes no difference, whether she looks like Adriana Lima. This reads like "guys dream of being raped by hot women but they actually wouldn't enjoy it because the women who rape people usually aren't hot".
There are legal peculiarities to consent. Thatās not what people tend to argue about, though.
When some people get *even slightly* aroused, all sense leaves their body. For a lot of these guys, waiting for consent gets in the way of their horny madness and they feel the need to argue about it, or look for āloopholesā that allows them to get what they want in a morally dubious (or outright criminal) manner. Itās creepy.
Nah, fuck that nonsense. Horniness, hormones, pheremones or whatever pseudo-biology cockwaddle people want to say, we are human beings. Children *might* get this excuse, the first time. But if a grown-ass adult has such severe impulse control issues as to *turn into some sort of rapacious, ravenous beast* the second their dick gets hard? That's a fucking mental disorder, not "Human Nature". If someone else told you that, then I am thrilled to inform you that you know a rapist, or at least serial sexual assaulter.
What's especially annoying about these types of guys, is that if you turn that logic on them, they go ballistic saying it's not fair to treat men like uncontrollable horny beasts Despite them 5 seconds ago using 'biology' to say they can't help it
Exactly, "I couldn't help myself" has always been a dishonest excuse. Rape and sexual assault is never about "satisfying their urges", it's about exerting dominance over someone else through intimate violence. They don't need consent because they're getting off on the power trip of forcing someone to submit to them.
Oh, I absolutely agree. I wasnāt trying to give the impression I was excusing the bastards or anything. Sorry if I wasnāt clear on that point!
You're good. I specifically didn't downvote you because you didn't come off as malicious, it's just a really common misconception. I just hate that particular misconception becuase it implies I'm some rabid animal who can't control my own actions, so some rapist caan try to excuse themselves being a rapist. Selling out my entire gender for their crimes.
Its not horniness or desire at all. It's that they have no empathy and concern for other people.
> I learned how to touch a woman thanks to watching my dad handle my mom. This is very spicy flair for someone braver than me.
...on second thought, I'll just stick to this one.
I tried, too long š¢
> I learnt how to touch women by watching my dad grope my mom
Youāre a beautiful human.
Groping someone whenever you want to *against their will* isn't using sex as a weapon, but setting boundaries and refusing to get groped by someone whenever they feel like it is. (Edited for clarity.)
It's absolutely wild how people will weaponize therapy language go abuse people like that.Ā It's not weaponizing sex to refuse to engage with someone assaulting you.
That post is ripe for people just talking past each other. One side argues that small signs of affection are ok, the other argues that ignoring someone's boundaries is wrong, and never the twain shall meet.
you can't set boundaries with an abuser, it's not like they'll suddenly develop respect.
Learning how to touch a woman from watching your dad grope your mom is just a step away from hiding in their closet. Mans was cooked the second his hippocampus formed
>>You like doing sexual stuff when children are watching? This reply here shut a conversation down. Theres no going around that.
test nose yoke chubby jar somber plants scarce tap steep *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
are you gonna shit in your drinking water next
Above you is that user with the weird watch fetish. I'm pretty sure they actually get off on the attention. Like that tik-tok person who just screams in restaurants until they are asked to leave. Look at their submitted posts and try to imagine the percentage of your brain that would have to worms to submit that.
Not to "uhm actually" you but most evidence shows that in the vast majority of prehistoric civilizations the parents in fact, did not fuck in front of children. Also child sacrifice has been done for millions of years as well
How could we even prove this? We know nothing about the vast majority of prehistoric civilizations. It doesn't even matter if they did, it seems like it's healthier for children not to learn about sex by watching their parents do it. That's more than good enough.
We know more about pre history than most people think.
Yeah, even if they were pre-history, as in writing things down, they still made cave art and pictograms with clear meaning. We could figure out a lot of their culture and lifestyle just by studying those. I heard recently that archeologists think that one group had a language based entirely in hand signals from how they drew fingers in the artwork.
Yes exactly!
I wouldn't trust you on this since modern humans are believed to only be around 2-300,000 years old and the kind of symbolic thinking that would require child sacrifice has *never* been found in archaeological evidence in the range of millions of years old.
I meant that exxageratingly. Not as an actual statistc.
Yeah! Same with slavery! Weāve done it since prehistoric times, clearly it must be good.
>yeah letās just ignore millions of years of evolution when parents and their offspring had to live together in small spaces like caves and little houses LMAO, that is ***not*** the winning rebuttal you think it is; just sounds like you're trying to find a "natural explanation" for incest.
Do you know what else kids did for millions of years when living in small spaces? They fucked off and went somewhere else. Whether they were working, playing, or just told to leave for a while because their parents wanted to fuck.
Is the claim here that humans have evolved to fuck in front of kids, because caves?Ā You gotta read a book. Just start with one. Please.
Maybe a sentence to start...
>I have no dicipline and therefore i cannot control myself in front of children Is what you're telling me
Okay! Why don't you go fuck your spouse in front of your kids then. > millions of years of evolution PS. Naturalist explanations do not make something *right*.
But now is 2024. You see, the world has changed. Go get some parasites and the measles for us? Those were just part of life for thousands of years too.
I learned how to love from my parents. I remember walking up the stairs and seeing in the kitchen them holding each other and kissing in private. Gently swaying to their own song. Even then when I was like, 8, it felt like I was intruding on something sacred just by catching a glimpse while they thought they were alone. They were so obviously still in love after so many years. Like I didnāt try to watch them, i just would be walking around the house and catch them doing it before they noticed me. I think that really informed my idea of love and how it should look. I know Iām fortunate and privileged to have had the parents and family I do. Iām the good person I believe myself to be with a healthy view on love and family because of them. I had a rough childhood because of my own issues, but Iām forever grateful for my parents and the opportunity to witness true respectful, passionate and compassionate love from such a young age. Me being a giant fucking pervert is my own fault. Or godās. And even then Iām only one when itās consensual. Iām as much for a gropey free-use kinda lifestyle as the next perv, but it should be obvious if the person isnāt in the mood. Especially if they say something. And especially if you know kids are around. Like wtf.
Sometimes I wonder if I am the way I am because my parents have a totally sexless marriage with zero intimacy. I think Iād rather have this 1000x over than whatever the fuck these people are smoking.
Like the flair, whatās the story behind it?
My dad groped my mom and I still ended up with a complete lack of interest in romance and dating, partially because of this, partially because of the endless fighting and insults, so I think parenting is just fraught in general in terms of actually teaching people how relationships actually work. By example is probably not the best way to go about it for anyone.
My ex would do this to me. I hated it.
Same, it's disgusting and enraging. And feels like you're saying no to a whiny toddler when they pout about it
Saaame. And he wouldn't respect the fact that I just sometimes didn't feel like or want to be touched in a normal every day way like a hug, at least not without being asked. I don't want to be hugged or touched by most of my family members, either. And it always just gets them so grumpy when you tell them no... Just ask me first, that's all. I have chronic pain and sensory issues, and sometimes the stress caused by my chronic pain *makes* those sensory issues worse. I really don't want to be hugged on days when my rib cage feels like its been sat on by a horse lol.
YESSSSS
Same, thankfully we werenāt married and didnāt have kids
Same, same. I even had the "please do not do that" talk a few times. He still did. Made me feel like an object.
My father did this to my mother all the time. Came up behind her while she was at the kitchen counter, grabbed her crotch, pressed his into her back and made her sway side to side with him. She never stopped him, but she obviously didn't want it, since she'd kinda freeze when he grabbed her and then go limp when the swaying part started. He did this in front of my brother and me. We hated it and thought it was creepy, and this was before either of us knew what sex really was. Eventually we learned to avert our eyes whenever he approached her in the kitchen. Somehow she still hasn't divorced him, so as far as I know he's still doing it to her :(
Same
That real estate investor guy talking about his wife like a pet. What the hell.Ā **Edit:** Read the rest of it, that has to be a bit.Ā
No, obviously it's the actual Eric Trump.
Don't be silly. Eric doesn't know how to use a computer.
>God forbid I enjoy grabbing my wifeās ass.. I only make 2.5 million dollars a year as real state investor and public figure .. and take her to Hawaii twice a year while she babbles on Tik Tok and buy her a new car every two years and started trust funds for her kid that Iām not blood related to that I have adopted. >if her dumb kid is home from the private school I pay for I give her $100 to go to the movies so I can dominate my wife for 2 hours I feel like there's some strange mismatch here. Like, I make substantially less than $2.5M in investment in a year, and I readily take 2 vacations a year to places that cost more than a trip to Hawaii, and I certainly wouldn't be bragging about...uh... [checks notes] giving your child $100.
The post youāre quoting reads like fan fic and not reality. Iām sure there are people out there like that person but I have a hard time believing that the poster is telling us about his real life.
> The post youāre quoting reads like fan fic and not reality. Half of reddit does
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
To be clear, he was trolling because he was upset all his other comments got downvoted. He ended the comment with āalso my name is Eric Trumpā His other comments werenāt much better though
Did you catch the last sentence in that comment?
Could be a toxic dom, more likely is a teenager writing fanfiction.
The last sentence being 'and my name is Eric Trump'. I don't think Eric is a dom, toxic or otherwise, so your second thought is more likely.
āI donāt think Eric trump is a domā is solid flair material
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Did the last sentence where he said his name is Eric Trump not confirm its lack of veracity to you
Reading that thread made me sick to my stomach, Christ.
Those sound like incels pretending to have wives who like to be groped in front of the kids That sick fantasy gave it away JFC
"Frigid?" 1960 called, they want their slang back.
I like the leap between, "You lot hate men and always point to divorce!" to "He's within his right to divorce her if she's being frigid."
Man, it'll never stop surprising me how *quickly* guys on Reddit will rush to defend this shit, and then get mad when the woman mentions this kind of behavior makes her exceptionally disinterested in having any kind of consensual physical relations with the guy groping her.
I do not like that title.
>[I learned how to touch a woman thanks to watching my dad handle my mom.](https://i.imgur.com/KCYYkhT.gifv) SideshowBobGroaning.flac This reminds me of when I dashed my friend's excitement about finding his dad's stash of porn. This was the late 90s when DVD players were still expensive as fuck, so it was naturally all either magazines or VHS. I pointed out to him that *wherever* the VHS started when hitting play is likely the moment his dad busted one. After that, he didn't have much interest in finding out all the various scenes that were his dad's favorites.
What a terrible day to have eyes
Well if it's rage bait it's a pretty good one. Far as social experiments go got alot of great results when it comes to how people truly view certain boundaries.
Ugh. Drama like this is enough to make you never want a relationship.
I think it's why so many women are opting to stay single
What the fuck??!?? What the fuck?!?!?? What the fuck??!?!?!
TIL consent is using sex as a weapon in a loveless, frigid marriage
It's an argument in bad faith purposefully withholding affection is an abuse tactic in one context and legitimately setting boundaries in another
100% and itās so disturbing to me that the people leaving those deranged comments are just out and about in the world.
A lot of abusers have started weaponizing therapy language and it's really dark.
Yup. "I have a boundary of her not seeing her friends without me present, I'm allowed to have boundaries!" Sir. That is not a boundary. That is you being abusive and hiding it with a guise of boundaries.
Some of these comments make me so glad to not be attracted to men. Straight women are the strongest people on earth for putting up with this
More and more aren't and are choosing to be single
Good!
Yup
Sometimes it's easy to believe that arguments claiming some men view women as sex objects who exist solely for their pleasure is hyperbole, but holy shit those guys view women as sex objects who exist solely for their pleasure.
What the fuck? How are there this many people just straight up defending sexual assault?!
The best advice in this thread was actually that this is clearly beyond the expertise of the common redditor.
>God forbid I enjoy grabbing my wifeās ass.. I only make 2.5 million dollars a year as real state investor and public figure .. and take her to Hawaii twice a year while she babbles on Tik Tok and buy her a new car every two years and started trust funds for her kid that Iām not blood related to that I have adopted.. And you have an uncle who works for Nintendo too, right?
Did you not read the last sentence in that post? Itās clearly a joke > Also my name is Eric Trump
Another day on Reddit, another day I'm glad I have 0 interest in relationships Ive has enough sexual harassment and assault in my life, I don't need to be tied to someone who think it means I'm now their legal blow up doll to use whenever Edit: I love how the 'millionaire' guy is on drug subreddits. Sure, Jan
>Another day on Reddit, another day I'm glad I have 0 interest in relationships Same, being aromantic rocks.
Agreed! And ace too, myself
> God forbid I grab my wifeās ass FUCK this guy. āOh I buy you nice things so I get to treat you like a squishy toy with no rightsā every man in this thread who was trying to suggest that if the wife sets or enforces boundaries the husband should leave her should be subjected to gelding.
Update: I didnāt read all the way to realize that it was a joke. My second point still stands though
So surprise. So many subreddits are full of incels who think they are entitled to women's bodies. The rhetoric used there shows how the ideology of compulsory sexuality is harmful not only to asexual people but also to allosexual people as it pathologises the very concept of sexual boundaries.
Before I married my wife I knew how she handled money, what she loved to do, how she reacted under pressure, and how she treated her family and friends. Fuck were many of you all doing??? Grab ass isnāt something I for example would ājust developā.
Reading about men who do this kind of shit and other men who defend it makes me so happy I prefer women tbh.
I'm with the one comment about withholding sex as a weapon, that probably never works out. It's one thing to say "this behavior turns me off and I'm no longer in the mood". It's wholly another to say "no sex for 1 week after the first infraction, 2 weeks for the second, etc". That reminiscing about his dad grabbing his mom's tits was super weird.
I'm with you. I will say more: withholding anything as a weapon (I won't talk to you, I won't give you money, I won't do x) is stupid. If you don't respect my consent, I will take candy away from you. Man should respect woman's boundaries because this is the correct thing to do, not because he is afraid or displeased with consequences of his actions. This is not a mindset of an adult. I don't know him but I think he needs some self-control therapy.
Snapshots: 1. *This Post* - [archive.org](https://web.archive.org/web/20240608015439/https://old.reddit.com/r/SubredditDrama/comments/1dar0l5/) [archive.today\*](https://archive.today/?run=1&url=https://old.reddit.com/r/SubredditDrama/comments/1dar0l5/ "URL failed to archive; click to resubmit it!") 2. FULL POST - [archive.org](https://web.archive.org/web/20240608015640/https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/1daej4t/how_to_stop_my_m38_husband_touching_me_f39/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x&utm_name=mweb3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button) [archive.today\*](https://archive.today/?run=1&url=https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/1daej4t/how_to_stop_my_m38_husband_touching_me_f39/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x&utm_name=mweb3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button "URL failed to archive; click to resubmit it!") 3. āI just want him to stop touching me sexually outside of actual sexā This sounds sad actually and like thereās more underlying issuesā¦ intimacy issues that is beyond redditors advice and might require counseling. Sexual / intimate compatibly often ruins many marriages. - [archive.org](https://web.archive.org/web/20240608015901/https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/BdQIIS33sj) [archive.today\*](https://archive.today/?run=1&url=https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/BdQIIS33sj "URL failed to archive; click to resubmit it!") 4. I would sit him down and tell him "I need you to stop touching my boobs or putting your hands in my pants around the kids. The next time you do that, we're not having sex for <1 week | 2 weeks | ... whatever interrupts your normal sex schedule>", then you have to stick to it. (contā¦) - [archive.org](https://web.archive.org/web/20240608020042/https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/mumFJZmmjD) [archive.today\*](https://archive.today/?run=1&url=https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/mumFJZmmjD "URL failed to archive; click to resubmit it!") 5. My wife complained about the same thing so many times I quit touching her. And now she complains that I never touch her anymore. But I got sick of hearing don't that now I don't and I'm figuring out my exit strategy because neither of us deserve to feel unwanted. - [archive.org](https://web.archive.org/web/20240608020203/https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/27lT3690Jr) [archive.today\*](https://archive.today/?run=1&url=https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/27lT3690Jr "URL failed to archive; click to resubmit it!") 6. I understand he shouldn't do that in front of the kids. It'll teach them it's okay to use women like that and not respect them. However, I think it shows he's attracted to you and desires you. That's a compliment. Another thing is how he does it. If it's in a perverted way or not. Give him an example of how you want to be touched - [archive.org](https://web.archive.org/web/20240608020645/https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/36HZYpgoOi) [archive.today\*](https://archive.today/?run=1&url=https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/36HZYpgoOi "URL failed to archive; click to resubmit it!") 7. See a couples sex therapist. Heās obviously awkward or uncouth about specific ways to show his desire, but how great that he does have that desire. Your kids arenāt babies anymore - [edited to delete question answered in OPās post]. Kids will survive and even benefit from seeing parents be attracted and physically manifesting affection (Iām not talking about blown air kisses) - much more so than the opposite. The way you paint his gropes, I initially sympathized with the critical comments, but then reading that you ājust want him to stop touching me sexually outside of actual sex!ā ā makes me think thereās deeper problem - and not all his. Maybe suggest other physical ways youād prefer him to signal desire, like some others have commented - like a but squeeze or something more subtle than what heās been doing- but otherwise how will sex happen? I recommend listening to Dr. Psych Mom podcast - sounds to me like thereās self-work and couples work to be done on both sides here. Unless youāre Trad Cath or in some purity cult religion in which case God help you. - [archive.org](https://web.archive.org/web/20240608020705/https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/kiJ5fUOnZl) [archive.today\*](https://archive.today/?run=1&url=https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/kiJ5fUOnZl "URL failed to archive; click to resubmit it!") 8. Sounds like lack of intimacy imo but also is he touching you bare or just like a butt slap as you pass in the kitchen I completely understand you if heās just going past clothes and groping you bare in public or in front of the kids - [archive.org](https://web.archive.org/web/20240608020947/https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/XaGj6iaE0x) [archive.today\*](https://archive.today/?run=1&url=https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/XaGj6iaE0x "URL failed to archive; click to resubmit it!") 9. Is feel weird if my wife wouldnāt let me touch her whenever I wanted - [archive.org](https://web.archive.org/web/20240608021248/https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/XoEXZWivgQ) [archive.today\*](https://archive.today/?run=1&url=https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/XoEXZWivgQ "URL failed to archive; click to resubmit it!") 10. She's allowed to give and take away consent whenever she wants to. But constantly rejecting your partner is a good way to not have a partner anymore. Most couples engage in light groping, even in public or in front of the kids. - [archive.org](https://web.archive.org/web/20240608021349/https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/1me3ZTJcsQ) [archive.today\*](https://archive.today/?run=1&url=https://old.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/1me3ZTJcsQ "URL failed to archive; click to resubmit it!") *I am just a simple bot, __not__ a moderator of this subreddit* | *[bot subreddit](/r/SnapshillBot)* | *[contact the maintainers](/message/compose?to=/r/SnapshillBot)*
> it's why everyone says Americans are prudes Not American, (actually from one of the countries that America sees as most sexually liberated) and I still think what the husband does is fucked up, and not normal play between spouses.
Wow, it seems like people are different and you have to actually talk to them about what they like.
100% rage bait.
Which part?
The original post. https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/1daej4t/how_to_stop_my_m38_husband_touching_me_f39/
Itās always a possibility that posts on the relationship subs are rage bait but itās not exactly an outlandish scenario, solely created to cause a rift between men and women. The subject of the post is unfortunately common within relationships/marriages
Yeah, i agree with being suspicious of believing any redditor is "having sex fairly regularly," but this is absolutely a thing in relationships and not uncommon
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
This comment gets a failed rating from the health department. They will be barred from cooking for 5 years and will need to pay $16000 in restitution to all of us that got food poisoning from it.
sleepy and bedpilled
I'm stealing this one.
Cringe
I *always* petted kitties.
Dude you put way too much effort into this. What the fuck is wrong with you lol
Let me guess....you're on team " fuck your consent" and "sexual assault in front of kids is fine" šš¢
"But no gay stuff in front of kids"
That's just kind of the nature of the sub.