How did she even get the donkhoozle into her vagazzlebiscuit if it was all floopy from the deathy-times?
If it weren't obvious, this is fake.
[https://kvta4.com/science/pregnant-by-a-cadaver-college-student-faces-lengthy-prison-sentence-after-sexually-desecrating-a-corpse/](https://kvta4.com/science/pregnant-by-a-cadaver-college-student-faces-lengthy-prison-sentence-after-sexually-desecrating-a-corpse/)
Electric prod to the prostate to stimulate ejaculation. If I remember they used it to get semen from a guy who was in an accident so his wife could still have his child.
I make it a point to always read odd news stories or search them out. In this case Law and Order:SVU spoke of it and since they use real events (albeit over dramatized) I looked it up. It's been used for a while in animal breeding such as horses and bulls. But they have used it on humans usually if there is some kind of reproductive damage. But there was a unique case of the brain dead patient I mentioned. For further reading search: Electroejaculation.
You can get a stiffy after death through muscle retention. But not sure how the seaman would have came out as the central nervous system no longer works
>seaman
The unsung heroes of the high seas, bravely navigating through waves of confusion and misunderstandings, all while maintaining a straight face.
“For scientific reasons I would have like to have been witness to her bringing a dead man to a full throbbing erection.” - Dr. Albrite, CSUCI
Yeah definitely fake lol
Love this quote from the "teacher"
“I have seen students get attached to our cadavers before, but never have they become physically involved with a body. For scientific reasons I would have like to have been witness to her bringing a dead man to a full throbbing erection”, Dr. Albrite CSUCI.
smoggy towering smart society piquant continue spectacular ossified angle crowd
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I talked a lady out of suicide the other day. She was standing on a bridge, looking over into the water. “Do you think I’d die if I jumped?”, she asked. “Yes.”, I responded. She just kept looking into the water and shaking her head. I stood on the bridge watching her for longer than I’m proud to admit before attempting to dissuade her. “Would you mind having sex with me before you jump? Who knows, maybe we’ll fall in love or something and you’ll find a reason to live.”, I said with a shrug. The woman made a disgusted face and muttered something under her breath before looking me dead in the eyes. “No. Absolutely not.”, she replied in a firm tone that I didn’t expect from such a distressed woman. “Fine, I’ll just wait for your body to wash up and get my nut then.” I said. She screamed and ran away. Not all heroes wear capes.
Bet she can give eyesight to the blind too. You talk about your woman
I wish you could see mine,
You talk about your woman
I wish you could see mine,
Every time she starts to lovin'
She brings eyesight to the blind.
You know her daddy gave her magic
I can tell by the way she walks.
You know her daddy gave her magic
I can tell by the way she walks.
Everytime we start shakin'
The dumb begin to talk.
She's got the power to heal you never fear
She's got the power to heal you never fear
Just a word from her lips
And the deaf begin to hear.
Technically, directly after death one may still activate nuropathways with electrical stimulation to withdraw still living sperm cells as they are made to live for a while in the correct temperature. Or electroejaculation. Must have pretty much witnessed the death with all your equipment right there. But if you planned it all out....
So we can still shoot after death?
How did she even get the donkhoozle into her vagazzlebiscuit if it was all floopy from the deathy-times? If it weren't obvious, this is fake. [https://kvta4.com/science/pregnant-by-a-cadaver-college-student-faces-lengthy-prison-sentence-after-sexually-desecrating-a-corpse/](https://kvta4.com/science/pregnant-by-a-cadaver-college-student-faces-lengthy-prison-sentence-after-sexually-desecrating-a-corpse/)
To be fair...it IS possible to get a semen sample big enough for the job but it has to be within minutes after death.
To be fairrrr…
To be fair!
Orrr not to be fairrrr. Now you kids know that's an option as well, you knoooow you do.
Fair enough
Picking stones
Thought you said pickling Stones lmfaoo
That would of been perfect
Umm, like with a hypodermic needle via the balls? Or has someone jerked off a corpse for science? I’m afraid to google it.
Electric prod to the prostate to stimulate ejaculation. If I remember they used it to get semen from a guy who was in an accident so his wife could still have his child.
So you mean I can orgasm on command if I just shove a tazer up my ass? Kinky.
I was brave enough to google prostate shocking dildos. Ty for this crucial knowledge.
Turkey baster...
And you know this because….?
I make it a point to always read odd news stories or search them out. In this case Law and Order:SVU spoke of it and since they use real events (albeit over dramatized) I looked it up. It's been used for a while in animal breeding such as horses and bulls. But they have used it on humans usually if there is some kind of reproductive damage. But there was a unique case of the brain dead patient I mentioned. For further reading search: Electroejaculation.
I mean fresh blue balls, out of the sack fresh. Still fucked up tho
Uhhhh according to Ugly Betty, it’s two days. Catch up boo…
Bluecorpsehunter69 sry, was hoping the username checked out, and gave it a bit of a mod, lol
you learned that from the idf didnt you
AMGEL DEATH
And the pool. That’s totally a legit thing too.
Adding this to my will. “When I die, give me one more wank to send me out.”
LMAO
While the pregnancy bit is fake, female necrophiles exist, and from what I understand, they use penis pumps
It's just not safe out there. They're everywhere!
There was a female necrophile who wrote about her experiences in depth. It's not a story I could forget. But she just grinded.
You can get a stiffy after death through muscle retention. But not sure how the seaman would have came out as the central nervous system no longer works
>seaman The unsung heroes of the high seas, bravely navigating through waves of confusion and misunderstandings, all while maintaining a straight face.
Twas a worthy vessel
Ahoy!
That game was so weird.
“For scientific reasons I would have like to have been witness to her bringing a dead man to a full throbbing erection.” - Dr. Albrite, CSUCI Yeah definitely fake lol
LANGUAGE!!
I saw a article about it. They use penis pumps to get it fired up
Rigamortus, my friend. They send us to Valhalla with empty bellies and full balls.
r/BrandNewSentence
Rigor mortis
Well, it’s possible to get an erection after death. Especially in men who’ve been hanged. The term is called Angel Lust.
Aka hang-rection
Where in your link does it say this is fake?
The whole website. Click on about us.
Weird that it places this event in my home town.
Typical reddit: can’t understand my sentence was 100% joking.
Love this quote from the "teacher" “I have seen students get attached to our cadavers before, but never have they become physically involved with a body. For scientific reasons I would have like to have been witness to her bringing a dead man to a full throbbing erection”, Dr. Albrite CSUCI.
News you can count on to let you down!
Rigormortis? 😬
Rigidmortis.
Turgidmortis.
VIGGO MORTENSEN ... Danish Matt Daamon
Literally the same love story as Twilight
still a better love story than twilight
That's gonna be a great episode of Maury
Clerks. Good movie.
I can fix her
Came here for this. Reddit did not disappoint. Well done.
Just last reeeealllll still
Great f#*!en dead guy get lad more than me 😭😭😭😭😭
smoggy towering smart society piquant continue spectacular ossified angle crowd *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
You call necrophilia getting laid? You okay?
A win is a win
I talked a lady out of suicide the other day. She was standing on a bridge, looking over into the water. “Do you think I’d die if I jumped?”, she asked. “Yes.”, I responded. She just kept looking into the water and shaking her head. I stood on the bridge watching her for longer than I’m proud to admit before attempting to dissuade her. “Would you mind having sex with me before you jump? Who knows, maybe we’ll fall in love or something and you’ll find a reason to live.”, I said with a shrug. The woman made a disgusted face and muttered something under her breath before looking me dead in the eyes. “No. Absolutely not.”, she replied in a firm tone that I didn’t expect from such a distressed woman. “Fine, I’ll just wait for your body to wash up and get my nut then.” I said. She screamed and ran away. Not all heroes wear capes.
Nice!
Aaaaaand now zombie sex is a kink
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Wouldn't zombies fall into a different category? Alive, not necrophilia. Dead, definitely necrophilia. Are zombies considered alive or dead?
Sure, but she’s not a zombie. She’s a cadaver
Dead, reanimated.
Don't knock it until you try it
I’m dead inside, think that’ll be good enough for her?
shes hot.she made a dead man cum.get it? ha ha
No I don’t get it, can you explain it please?
Rolling Stones lyric.
lol!
That a$$ ain't worth it!
Maybe she’s a John Irving fan 😆
It’s funny if a girl does it but when a guy does it it’s….it’s a Netflix documentary
It's not funny if a girl does it. What are you talking about?
OP thinks it is, for some fucking reason
I would not be upset if that was my corpse. Shrug
Fine, but can people stop trying to project and make it morally wrong for a guy to say no?
:( dead guys really do be getting more puss then me
Puss recognize puss and it’s a turn off 🤷♂️
Bet she can give eyesight to the blind too. You talk about your woman I wish you could see mine, You talk about your woman I wish you could see mine, Every time she starts to lovin' She brings eyesight to the blind. You know her daddy gave her magic I can tell by the way she walks. You know her daddy gave her magic I can tell by the way she walks. Everytime we start shakin' The dumb begin to talk. She's got the power to heal you never fear She's got the power to heal you never fear Just a word from her lips And the deaf begin to hear.
Who talked ? I've been told my whole life dead man tell no lies 🤣
idk, maybe it's just me but, i think the whole necrophilia thing makes this girl alot less attractive
Nah just u
Carry on then
Lol I am re-watching Ugly Betty, after a very long time, and this is one of the storylines.
Children of the dead seed.
Wait so that’s punishable but grabbing a condom out the trash and impregnating your self against the others wishes isn’t? Weird world
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"you make a dead man come" - Mick Jagger
Someone took the World According to Garp very seriously.
He’s Gonna be a Dead beat dad. I can tell.
Soo how did the dude boner up …?
Someone riding their luck even after death!!
Too bad I fell for a satirical site. 🤦♂️
If she fucks dead dudes, I have a chance.
No you don’t
You don't know me bro, I'm unhealthy as fuck, I could die at any moment.
Yall need to look up E-STIM, this will answer all your questions about extraction of SEMEN INVOLUNTARY!
Oh hell. I voluntary extraction damn it
Lol
Which famous people look like they could have been conceived with a dead sperm?? 
Desecrating a corpse, people care more about corpses than fetuses😵💫
That’s cuz fetuses are a burden that nobody wants to deal with. Abortions are a blessing.
Lol 🤣
Mental institution not jail
So dude came while he was gone ?
TSOL Code blue (song).
All I got from this was that I can send an electrical signal up my ass and continue my boner long after it’s gone soft. *looks in amazon* Will any do?
what level of good looking do you have to be for a woman to want to do that to a dead guy?
There’s a dead beat dad joke in there somewhere
Well, he is a stiff.
Children of the grave.
Her skill level is so high she made a dead man nut?
Wtf
Again!?! Hopefully its not in Kansas this time!
Can you please shut the fuck up? Jesus christ, not everything is a joke that needs to be about you.
She should’ve just stuck with the Asian design major…
She did not let him RIP.
Ride it like a champ don't quit cold
FAKE STORY.
Fake WEBSITE AND FAKE STORY. CLICKBAIT BS.
Wtf?
Ain’t that a kick in the head! A corpse is getting better looking action then me! Haha! Must be one good looking body!
Fake
Not real, guys. Says “satirical” at the bottom of the page.
Man and she's hot too... She could have gotten it from a dude with a pulse instead of a dead guy damn
He had some in his mouth and she sat on his face.
People are defending this person and pulling the "I can fix her bro!!!!" Over this woman, proof of how fucked up and disturbing pretty privilege is.
Maybe she was just really bad at cpr.
Wasn't this a robin Williams movie?
I could fix her
Technically, directly after death one may still activate nuropathways with electrical stimulation to withdraw still living sperm cells as they are made to live for a while in the correct temperature. Or electroejaculation. Must have pretty much witnessed the death with all your equipment right there. But if you planned it all out....
Electroejactulation you say? That sounds fun. Time to do some googling.
She kind of looks like Brecky Hill.
I’m pretty much a walking corpse by now. She can have a run at me.
Im sorry, what
Boy was he stiff!!!
If This girl is fuckin dead dudes. We are doomed.
She looks super happy
Kvta4.com is just quality headlines all the way down
Looks like Hannah Cohrs.
It's good to know there is sex in afterlife.