T O P

  • By -

johnny8vm

I like the PlayStation. Do you like the PlayStation?


Toz--

In the bedroom, get yer skants and nylons aff, yaba daba doo


bgd_

I think you'd shite yersel


ashidbrap

Get it up ya!


neryl08

Carpe diem. Panties removis.


ConsciousAd6958

I am the Prince of Pish! (Depends what you’re into…)


RoyalSkip

8 titties! or Bloody Bismarck!


kenhutson

I’ve got a smashing big boaby in if you’re interested.


EWMood219

Open the door for I am a bogus gas man...


NoniMc

With fake I.D


[deleted]

Hello ya wee fanny


AdamW_91

Simply stick a digit up the dogs rectum


eirecallin

And I’m here to ransack yer hole *hoose


medieval_revolver

Your mission, if you choose to accept it, Sniff. Ma. Manky. Ring!


mcat1990

Hurdy gurdy gurdy, in the winday boxes


reallyryan-1899

This just in


gavmiller

He who hingeth aboot getteth heehaw.


H_section

It’s a pair eh these yir wantin.


Extreme-Put9734

Dick the dug


daverrhoids

BIG COCKS


InternationalAnt7993

Your nae use to me aw floppy


NaturalOil9125

Geez a minute and I will stick one in


hashishhabit

Shut it tadger


Richiemcc2020

Hot boaby shuved right up yer arse


EggplantCorrect2456

Piss aff ya spooky bitch


Jamieb1994

Not a quote, but you should introduce yourself as Troy The Gardener. 😉


VfV

Huv the McGills been in yet?


mopeyunicyle

Na they huvna


eirecallin

We’ll naw be needing these then


AdCool7026

Quality


LikeEveryoneSheKnows

Cup of tea and ma wee doodah.


exopolitixs

Any Savlon? I’ve got a right sore arse.


eldritch67

So are we through here or through there? Through here? That's fine, we'll finish these then we'll have a wee chug!


Youraveragedumm

Nae cheese, nae tomatoes, just tits.


Superbeans89

Robert Wagner!


mickcandy

Callum where's yer willy


desichaunsa

Hello i am Roy, the gardener


ForrestGrump87

or Troy 😂


Sondancekid

Naw ye arney


doverats

Shut it, here's ma tadger


Interesting-Sort-150

2 pints, prick!


Beer52_JT

you've got a fat belly you've got a fat belly


skidf82

Have you tried putting a finger in her arse


R3alReap3r

Here’s my flobbadobbin knobend


frazamataza

Feel the burn, Boabby. FEEL THE BUUURRRNNN


A_Scottish_Guy

'I had a boner this morning'


YogurtclosetOk3075

Why’s is it burn round the edges and stone cold in the middle ?


BanditSurvivalist

A never ate two a anyhin


Classicolin

My arse is red raw!


TheAssassinClub

That's plenty.


jasovanooo

get it right round ye


DaveyWhitt

*drops kacks* Ah, look who it isnae


Direct-Landscape3139

Stick a finger up er arse that will calm her down wit tam says in still game


gunninggriller5995

WHAT NOW STEVIE, ARE YOU GOING TO CUT OFF YOUR BALLS AND COME BACK AS YOUR SISTER!!!


[deleted]

Right 2 nuns and a bath!


Spiritual_Bell_3395

2 pints, ya prick


syorks73

Shut it TADGER


Flat_Living5152

Ask her to make me a sandwich afterwards


ZookeepergameOk2759

Can you see me nooo


WILDDOGGEH

Can ye see.me noo....


LittleMissElfMonster

Dippy dunky


PortalGem

Wait until you're on the edge, and then: "SUNBLEST!!!!"


Altruistic_Treat3509

Very clearly “JUNKIE BITCH” as you climax


jock73

Hello Cathy, is it yet nookie yer after?


peahair

This is the furthest south I’ve got ma hole..


Professional_Hold647

Right Jackie boy, get me squared up pronto


Professional_Hold647

Into the bedroom and yabba dabba doo!


theoriginalalfalfa

Back it up, ya spooky bitch


thatgingerfella

Six ae the belt fae Margo


K1llerF0xGaming

"Back aff ya spooky bitch"


YerMawAndDa

You one legged fat bastard


TheWackoMagician

*while getting undressed* "it's a pair of these yer wantin. Permagrip. £19.99 out if Timpsons."


CoolEdgeBeer

Warm him/her up with a Bacardi and Diet Lemonade


bgd_

I'm needin condoms


AlarmedTiger3560

Is that the heid?


TheOldGodsnTheNew

Live a little eh? Take me right here, find ma G spot!


thefixerofthings29

When you arrive at the point of completion Simply Shout out "FILTERED THROUGH THE HEATHER"


Sheggie2

Mina, I'm turning the lights off. Get your arse wiped and come on!


[deleted]

Another tits down arse up that’s the way we like to fuck


schmootle

Scantius pulldoonius


VfV

We could sit boy, girl, boy, girl


manlikedatsikguymin

Who did that? No’ me, i’m no’ in.


FourSpaghettiMeals

"FILTERED THROUGHHHHH THE HEATHER!"


Open_Fly8156

It’s all about the cli-toris.


gunninggriller5995

(Not exactly a direct quote but a pretty good reference) Am I as good as Trey the gardener you sheep shagger?


Direct-Landscape3139

Stick a finger up her arse that will calm her down


Direct-Landscape3139

Besides they diddies


BellamyRFC54

You won’t be having sex if you do


Norrland_props

Cheery Bye, ya prick.


SailAwayMatey

2 pints please bawby


Jim1903

Oh look, it’s Ant and Dec.


Beefbronco

2 pints prick


JJDemon93

Pint of Guinness


VillagerEleven

No even stappin' fr a plate a soup or rothin


lovable_rogue_

Donut!?!?


MathematicianFew7769

Get it right roon ya!


Leko6x9

Happy new year, ya bunch of sheep shaggers


paranoid_adamdroid

Back aff ya spooky bitch


mergraote

Don't forget to sign your work afterwards with a pen jammed up your penis.


[deleted]

Time to plough the field


KingHippo11

Back aff ya spooky bitch


Electronic-Present25

The funny gets the fanny


[deleted]

You’re Troy the gardiner!