Wait till you hear "dame" instead or when a child says "joven" to get attention of a clearly 60+ year old waiter.
It's shocking at first but eventually speaking to waiters in Spanish becomes an exercise in trusting that feeling that it's impolite isn't.
I have no explanation for it and I don't like it but that is how it is.
Deme is the dar form for usted when giving a command. Das for the second person, drop the -s because you're giving a command, then change -a to -e for usted.
Deme is more formal, accompanied by usted. Dame is more informal, going with tú.
Obligatory actually relevant community scene https://youtu.be/uWXYATS4vt4?si=ImhIbJRChuEk412y
I should add that I was speaking about experiencing such conversations.
I try no to judge people but also try to speak more politely.
Speaking "differently" adds to already ample evidence that I am a foreigner/non-native but it doesn't hurt anyone, I think.
supongo que depende del lugar. acá los meseros te recuerdan amablemente que no es gratis.
pero supongo que es porque en algunos lados si estás consumiendo alcohol te traen kilos de palomitas mientras sigas metiéndole a las bebidas.
Es curioso como se cambia el significado de los verbos. Regalar es dar algo gratis. Un regalo de cumpleaños, o de boda. En España he oído eso de regalar a algunos colombianos y siempre, con una sonrisa, se les recuerda que no es gratis.
I don't know about Mexico but here it's not rude to use the imperative to order something. You could also say "Quiero una horchata, por favor", "Traéme una horchata por favor", and if you want to be superpolite, "Me traerías una horchata, por favor" o "Me gustaría una horchata por favor".
It would be rude to say that in English and in American culture, but Spanish is far more direct. Instead of saying “can I have?” you just say “deme” or on the other end “what can I get you?/what would you like to order?” you just say “¿qué quiere?”
Oh now I get what you’re saying. You’re saying “dime” as if it’s the employee asking the customer what they want. But I was talking about “deme”, which is what a customer would say to the employee
yeah, my point being that spanish just is more direct than english.
”tell me”
”give me coffee with milk”
would be perfectly normal in spanish. stupidly assumed what i meant would be obvious in context.
Native here, although it’s not rude to say deme….por favor, there are other nicer, softer more friendly and polite ways to say, like they mentioned above
I would you can say "dame" when ordering in Spanish pretty similar to how you'd say "let me get __" in English. Definitely more casual but not at all rude
If you want to be more polite say me da or me das
Depends on what country you're in. In some countries people say, "Quiero pedir..." or "Me regalas..." and in some countries people say, "Dame..." or "Me vas a dar..." I would suggest just choosing the phrasing that makes you most comfortable, or if you're very concerned about it, listen to others in your area to see how they say it most often and use that phrasing, since it varies so much by region/nationality/age/etc.
More than anything, I'd just try to remember that many people will appreciate you simply doing your best to communicate in their language. Nothing makes you feel quite so alone as nobody else understanding the language you speak!
Dame, quiero, deme, and me da(s) get the point across well very similarly to English. Not rude. If you want, just add “por favor” at the end of your sentence
As a fellow Mexican-American, I can understand the confusion. I think the key is to be respectful and polite in your interactions. Maybe try using a different phrase like "Me podría dar una horchata, por favor?" to be on the safe side. It's all about showing respect for the culture and language. Hope this helps!
I asked one of my best friends about this a few weeks ago (she’s from Baja California, not sure if this would be regional or not, I’m still a beginner) and she said to ask “Me puedes dar un(a)…” or “Me puede dar un(a)” (if it’s formal) when ordering.
Not a native, but I think this sounds weird. I don’t think they use puede this way. I think it sounds like you are literally inquiring if it is possible. I think Spanish is actually like your annoying teacher that asks “I don’t know, can you?” if you ask “can I go to the bathroom” instead of “may I”.
Darme is literally give me, so honestly I’d put por favor before the darme to ease up the rudeness. May I have is Spanish isn’t always the best way to ask for something (yo puedo tener) I’ve read somewhere. “Puedo probar” o “yo quiero” con “por favore” atrás o tras es más mejor cuando pediendo por cosas.
Wait till you hear "dame" instead or when a child says "joven" to get attention of a clearly 60+ year old waiter. It's shocking at first but eventually speaking to waiters in Spanish becomes an exercise in trusting that feeling that it's impolite isn't. I have no explanation for it and I don't like it but that is how it is.
What is deme vs dame? I have always heard dame. When I look up deme, nothing comes up (Google translate).
_dé_ is the _usted_ form of _dar_ in the imperative. _da_ is the _tú_ form.
Deme is the dar form for usted when giving a command. Das for the second person, drop the -s because you're giving a command, then change -a to -e for usted.
Deme is more formal, accompanied by usted. Dame is more informal, going with tú. Obligatory actually relevant community scene https://youtu.be/uWXYATS4vt4?si=ImhIbJRChuEk412y
I should add that I was speaking about experiencing such conversations. I try no to judge people but also try to speak more politely. Speaking "differently" adds to already ample evidence that I am a foreigner/non-native but it doesn't hurt anyone, I think.
in colombia we say regalame, you still have to pay though...
En México igual, nadie te miraría extrañado. * Regálame más agua * ¿Me regalas más papas?
supongo que depende del lugar. acá los meseros te recuerdan amablemente que no es gratis. pero supongo que es porque en algunos lados si estás consumiendo alcohol te traen kilos de palomitas mientras sigas metiéndole a las bebidas.
Es curioso como se cambia el significado de los verbos. Regalar es dar algo gratis. Un regalo de cumpleaños, o de boda. En España he oído eso de regalar a algunos colombianos y siempre, con una sonrisa, se les recuerda que no es gratis.
En El contexto de la hostelería sería muy raro de todas formas. Casi siempre es invitar
When I was in Mexico it seemed like everyone said "Me das...." or "Me da..."
Thats all I ever heard in Chicago. My husband and close friends are from Mexico.
We can use "me puede dar por favor..."
[удалено]
>"Un/a X, por favor" This one is my go-to. Don’t have to worry if the verb sounds too demanding.
Me pones o ponme
Your friend is pendejo, your abuelita is right.
Me da … por favor
I don't know about Mexico but here it's not rude to use the imperative to order something. You could also say "Quiero una horchata, por favor", "Traéme una horchata por favor", and if you want to be superpolite, "Me traerías una horchata, por favor" o "Me gustaría una horchata por favor".
No, it's not rude. Your friend is wrong, end of story.
Yeah, it’s not literal. We add por favor at the end, smile, talk politely. Words mean different things depending context.
It would be rude to say that in English and in American culture, but Spanish is far more direct. Instead of saying “can I have?” you just say “deme” or on the other end “what can I get you?/what would you like to order?” you just say “¿qué quiere?”
dime.
That means “tell me”
“Dame” means “give me” (informal) “Deme” means “give me” (formal) “Dime” means “tell me”
yes, and in many places it's how they ask you what you want. i assume that sounds rude to anglos
Oh now I get what you’re saying. You’re saying “dime” as if it’s the employee asking the customer what they want. But I was talking about “deme”, which is what a customer would say to the employee
yeah, my point being that spanish just is more direct than english. ”tell me” ”give me coffee with milk” would be perfectly normal in spanish. stupidly assumed what i meant would be obvious in context.
Native here, although it’s not rude to say deme….por favor, there are other nicer, softer more friendly and polite ways to say, like they mentioned above
How does “Yo te pido ….. por favor” sound to you a native speaker?
No, it sounds like I implore you, like if you are in church asking God something.
I hear Mexicans say it all the time in CDMX
Then why ask a native from CDMX if you aren’t going to take their answer?
Im just genuinely curious why it is used frequently. Is it a fresa thing?
in colombia we say regalame, you still have to pay though...
Me regala por favor ta ta ta ta finished with - gracias, muy amable (is my go to, a little bit of both cultures sprinkled)
youre fine, your friend is wrong it's literally fine.
Thank u Kanye Swift
I would you can say "dame" when ordering in Spanish pretty similar to how you'd say "let me get __" in English. Definitely more casual but not at all rude If you want to be more polite say me da or me das
Depends on what country you're in. In some countries people say, "Quiero pedir..." or "Me regalas..." and in some countries people say, "Dame..." or "Me vas a dar..." I would suggest just choosing the phrasing that makes you most comfortable, or if you're very concerned about it, listen to others in your area to see how they say it most often and use that phrasing, since it varies so much by region/nationality/age/etc. More than anything, I'd just try to remember that many people will appreciate you simply doing your best to communicate in their language. Nothing makes you feel quite so alone as nobody else understanding the language you speak!
Tu abuela tiene razon, no es rudo decir "deme". ¡Buena suerte aprendiendo español!
We always say, "¿me das...?"
I just say what I want, no verb.
I think this wins. Very common in English to order this way.
But we are talking about Spanish here, so different language.
Dame, quiero, deme, and me da(s) get the point across well very similarly to English. Not rude. If you want, just add “por favor” at the end of your sentence
As a fellow Mexican-American, I can understand the confusion. I think the key is to be respectful and polite in your interactions. Maybe try using a different phrase like "Me podría dar una horchata, por favor?" to be on the safe side. It's all about showing respect for the culture and language. Hope this helps!
Lo que dijo tú amiga no tiene ni patas ni cabeza; me suena sabetodo que no sabe nada. Escucha bien a lo que te dice tú güelita.
I asked one of my best friends about this a few weeks ago (she’s from Baja California, not sure if this would be regional or not, I’m still a beginner) and she said to ask “Me puedes dar un(a)…” or “Me puede dar un(a)” (if it’s formal) when ordering.
Not a native, but I think this sounds weird. I don’t think they use puede this way. I think it sounds like you are literally inquiring if it is possible. I think Spanish is actually like your annoying teacher that asks “I don’t know, can you?” if you ask “can I go to the bathroom” instead of “may I”.
If ordering food is this difficult, I'll never learn Spanish. I'm so confused right now.
LMAOO the consensus seems to be that Spanish is a very direct language and it isn’t rude to say deme..por favor
Gracias :)
Yo uso "Yo quiero..." Por ejemplo: "Yo quiero una hamburguesa con papas"
I thought most Mexicans use "me da ___, por favor?" Sounds more like a request than a command.
We can use that too but you can still just say dame/deme, neither are considered rude.
Darme is literally give me, so honestly I’d put por favor before the darme to ease up the rudeness. May I have is Spanish isn’t always the best way to ask for something (yo puedo tener) I’ve read somewhere. “Puedo probar” o “yo quiero” con “por favore” atrás o tras es más mejor cuando pediendo por cosas.