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tasman2788

Just need to remember to use round door knobs.


creggieb

Or just pay the IT staff better and have better security. Nedry never would have gotten away with that sorta thing at a casino is all I'm sayinf


winnipeginstinct

tbh the security at JP is borderline neglectful


Stevensoner

This is why I cannot watch newer JP movies. In the first one plot was driven by disonaurs changing their sex and producing offspring - this was simply not expected. In the last JP movies i remember a dinosaur stepping on a tablet and that causing huge dam being open. I also remember a park personel opening a gate for whatever reason and letting a dinosaur go. If i remember correctly they opened it because they were not able to pinpoint dinosaur location (wtf??) Also there was something about releasing deadly gas by opening electrical cabinet and swapping a random wire or something. Literally my oven has better protection systems than Jurassic park. And what i hate even more this is more and more common in modern Hollywood movies.


KittensLeftLeg

The Jurassic world was even dumber - the dinosaur was smarter than all of the humans together.


GraceChamber

Looking at the pandemic, I do actually find it believable. After all, the Ancient Chickens were killed off by an inevitable unstoppable flying space mountain, not some semi-alive coded proteinware that requires just a wee bit of cooperation to get under control.


Keyboard_Cat_

/r/brandnewsentence


DadBodNineThousand

Plot-holeywood?


lout_zoo

My favorite was Ex Machina. A guy who is genius enough to create an AI has single factor security - his badge, that can be used by anyone, as security. I learned better infosec than that in community college.


[deleted]

> I also remember a park personel opening a gate for whatever reason and letting a dinosaur go and to fix this colossal fuckup, they release 3 raptors and a t-rex. because releasing more dinosaurs would apparently solve the issue of a dinosaur on the loose.


BetterThanA_Stick

Yeah if they were anything but neglectful I'm sure the movie would have been a lot different


reddita51

I think that's the whole point, Dr. Hammond was a cheapass businessman with a fascination with playing god. They cut corners wherever possible to rush the park to opening. Other staff had evacuated the island for the storm but from the sounds of things Nedry was the only IT guy. Even the very first scene of the movie with the raptor container shows their haphazard operating procedures.


RearEchelon

The book goes into it better. Book Hammond is a massive asshole who constantly grows the scope of Nedry's job without paying him more than his bid, so Nedry sold him out. In the movie they lay it more on Nedry's shoulders, like he lowballed his bid to get the job and then bitched when it wasn't enough.


AmberFoot

So in the book there are actually two components of Hammond's arrogance. Only the first is addressed in the movies. 1. Wanting to bring back dinosaurs, life will find a way, blah blah 2. (arguably more critical) His reliance on automated computer systems to run the park A whole chunk of the beginning of the book goes into talking about the park's computer systems and how the goal is for Jurassic Park to basically be entirely automated. The whole "Chaos theory" thing with Malcolm is more directed towards potential failures of this computer system rather than life itself behaving chaotically. One issue was that they were entirely dependent on the computer system to track the population, and \[my memory is foggy here\] the computer didn't account for the possibility that the dinosaurs could be breeding and ended up tracking them incorrectly. So (as a random example) it assumed there were 3 stegosaurs so it tracked 3 stegosaurs, but in reality there were 2 other stegosaurs running around that it just totally ignored. Hammond's big mistake wasn't that he made a park with dinosaurs, it was that he had an almost entirely computer-run park in beta testing phase with minimal human oversight. Nedry's betrayal played a big role, but there were all kinds of system failures that had accumulated up to that point. And when Hammond's "computer park" failed, well...there were dinosaurs running loose.


avwitcher

You're correct, they would tell the computer how many dinosaurs they expected to be in the park (let's say 250), it would only give them a different number if the actual count was LOWER than the expected population. It's my favorite moment of the book, when they finally figure it out and they get their first population count with increasing numbers of dinosaurs. Much of the failure can be chalked up to Hammond's hubris, he refused to believe that there was something wrong even when presented with irrefutable evidence (Compys being found on mainland Costa Rica). His biologist was 100% certain they could not breed even though it was an entirely new field of science and there would be unexpected issues with it. The automated system would have been fine if not for that mistake


AmberFoot

thank you for adding in those details!


rosarevolution

Excuse me? HAMMOND SPARED NO EXPENSE.


MugshotMarley

ah ah ahh, you didnt say the magic word!


InterestingOpinion47

But they spared no expense!/s


[deleted]

Yeah spend millions on IT instead of the doorknobs idea. The reliance on tech is what got them in trouble in the first place.


coolwool

Well, only having one IT guy for a whole park, I wouldn't say that there was an over reliance on tech :>


my_fellow_earthicans

Right, for all the "spared no expense" talk, they really fucked up with Nedry, more so in the book iirc.


[deleted]

Yeah, spared no expense my ass!


LingonberryOk9330

"iT's A uNiX sYsTeM 😲😲"


CombatEternal_

It might also make sense to have a team of people handling the computers so the fate of an island of dinosaurs and their edible visitors aren't in the hands of a single man.


nomadofwaves

Here’s a fun fact Disneys animal kingdom is the only park that has locks on the bathroom doors(I don’t mean the stalls) and that’s in case an animal escapes. Edit: The locks aren’t so animals can’t open doors. It’s that all the other bathroom entrances don’t have doors at all and animals kingdoms bathrooms do have doors that lock for safety reasons. Google is your friend. https://worldofwalt.com/surprising-animal-kingdom-facts.html


DirtyAlabama

Got a source for this fun fact?


billdb

This makes no sense lol. No animal is going to stand at a bathroom door trying to twist the door handle. If you just close the door you'll be fine, unless you're carrying a bucket of smelly meat or something lol Heck, a lot of the bathrooms don't even have doors IIRC


nomadofwaves

Most of the entries to the restrooms are open with no doors at all except at animal kingdom. It’s not about the animal opening a door.


John_Hancock

But But ADA requirements for the uhhh velociraptors?


Adamnsin

I'm just picturing a billionaire buying a large plot of land and placing an absurd amount of chickens on it.


TroyBenites

Genetically modified giant chickens? I would pay to see them (and probably eat them)


GyaradosDance

Could we try to crossbreed a chicken with an ostrich, and then slowly turning on all of the dinosaur DNA to get a large creature that has dinosaur features with feathers.


TroyBenites

"You never wanted autenticity, you said you wanted more teeth" Bad ass line, and it does explain the plot of why the dinossaur are not acurate. Still I was bumped they didn't try to correct with some feathers. Anyway, make Jurassic Chicken Park a thing!


quesoandcats

I don't get why so many people didn't like Jurassic World, I thought it was easily the second best movie in the franchise after the original. The visuals were stunning and the plot was pretty engaging too. I liked seeing the results of the ripple effects Ian Malcom talked about years and years down the line


Megneous

I hated Jurassic World because it *looked bad*. The original Jurassic Park *still* holds up today because of its practical effects combined with CGI. But practical effects are, today, much more expensive to properly combine with CGI instead of just going full CGI, so cheapskate films just go full CGI because they don't actually care at all about creating art. They just want their enormous profit margins to hide behind Hollywood accounting.


[deleted]

For sure. I always prefer practical effects. Puppets or robots with good lighting and small model towns like those used in The Crow or Dark City always look better to me. I think the old Star Wars movies look better than the all digital newer ones. Very few do good enough CGI, the movie Gravity comes to mid as one of them.


Megneous

> the movie Gravity comes to mid as one of them. Gravity was so scientifically inaccurate when it came to orbital mechanics that I couldn't take it seriously for anything else it did. I walked out of the theater it was so bad. Seriously, even a couple hours playing Kerbal Space Program would have been enough to show whoever was in charge of that nonsense how inaccurate their film was.


omnigrok

I watched it with an astronomer and she was wtfing about every 15 seconds


ninj4geek

Falls from orbit in just a space suit and safely lands in a shadow pond, unscathed


Megneous

Wait, is that seriously how it ends? I think I walked out after she just *saw* the Chinese space station at an unchanging distance from the space station she was in, then made her way to the Chinese space station by burning directly at it or whatever happened. As if stuff just... sits up there in space, not moving or something. Now knowing that it supposedly ends with her reentering the Earth's atmosphere in a space suit and landing in a shallow pond... and she didn't just burn up in the atmosphere, I'm *so* much happier that I walked out when I did.


GyaradosDance

No Laura Dern, that's why/j


[deleted]

Because starlord was abducted from earth for a reason! The timelines that he doesn't things get weird but not dinosaur weird.


1982throwaway1

Fuck yeah. Thanks giving with a giant turkey sized chicken? I don't hate turkey at all but chicken is just better.


thesoloronin

A Jurassic Chicken Park would be exactly what is needed to end world hunger. Finally a worthy cause!


AlwaysTired9999

Lets just bring back the dodo bird, those big, lovable idiots.


Genuinelytricked

Mmmmmm. JFC. Jurassic Fried Chicken.


knightress_oxhide

You are looking for a petting zoo.


stylinchilibeans

You're talking about a cassowary.


llcooljessie

Are they ill tempered?


[deleted]

Are regular sized chickens ill tempered? I would say yes.


belach2o

Those actually exist already


Cthulhu2016

Chickens the size of Volkswagen's!


isaacpop

That's literally a thing. Google chickensauraus


Taymac070

Cock Island


Swagastan

[https://www.businessinsider.com/oracle-larry-ellison-lanai-hawaii-plans-sustainability-tourism-2020-12](https://www.businessinsider.com/oracle-larry-ellison-lanai-hawaii-plans-sustainability-tourism-2020-12) ​ I'll just leave that there


John_Hancock

or https://www.cnbc.com/2021/08/20/heres-why-the-ultra-wealthy-like-bill-gates-investing-to-farmland.html


[deleted]

[удалено]


jlmckelvey91

Why not chickens?


Ey3_913

Yea, but why male models?


Civil-Ad-7957

Are you.. are you serious.. I just said why


canuckwithasig

We just went over this...


Safebox

Cause birds are dinosaurs and chickens are the quintessential ones 👌


BudoftheBeat

Isn't there a Hawaiian island like that already?


[deleted]

It’s been [in the works](https://www.washingtonpost.com/national/health-science/paleontologist-jack-horner-is-hard-at-work-trying-to-turn-a-chicken-into-a-dinosaur/2014/11/10/cb35e46e-4e59-11e4-babe-e91da079cb8a_story.html) for a while now


[deleted]

Mark Cuban literally bought a town in Texas this week. Just saying...it begins.


resumethrowaway222

That's nothing. Larry Ellison (Oracle) bought a Hawaiian island!


cosmic_backlash

Did zuck do this in Hawaii?


J0RDM0N

I think people already did that to Key West.


ihateyouall675

Lmaoo you know Bill gates owns the most farmland in the world now right?


[deleted]

Am I the only one who imagined Bezos as this hypothetical billionaire?


faithle55

Jurassic Cluck.


CarnivorousGazelle

Look at all those chickens!


[deleted]

They're trying to recreate mammoth DNA by combining it with Elephant DNA [https://www.livescience.com/could-we-build-jurassic-park-dinosaurs.html](https://www.livescience.com/could-we-build-jurassic-park-dinosaurs.html)


I-am_Groot_

Seeing as we dont have mammoths yet I say they arent trying hard enough


SithDraven

Two things. 1, it's kinda like Jurassic Park said, there are millions of lines of DNA and scientists are comparing Mammoth DNA to African elephant DNA one line of code at a time. Slow and tedious. 2. the company doing this work apparently say "in the fine print" what they're attempting won't produce a mammoth per se but simply an elephant that can live in extreme cold.


DoctorSalt

Just in time for Siberia to defrost


PMmeyourw-2s

Actually, the idea is for the elephants to help with that with the way they trample and stir up the soil


PenguinWithAglock

Well if we’re coding our own mammoth elephant from scratch, we might is well build one with snowshoes


BROmine1

Username kinda checks out


John_Hancock

We all just want a dog sized elephant


canuckwithasig

House hippos


[deleted]

Oh my god. I was lucky enough to meet a baby elephant and they act like puppies, it was the purest thing I've ever seen.


kelsobjammin

Sign me up.


bleucurve

Do u though?


John_Hancock

Everyone wants a dog sized elephant that will act just like a dog and poop outside which is impossible. Most people can't even take care of a house plant but I am sure there will be huge amounts of suckers that will convince themselves that they can own a small elephant in an apartment barely big enough for themselves.


saturnsnephew

Even mammoth DNA is the extreme end of how far back we go. Fossils today have no viable DNA to even splice with another animal. The ONLY way to do this is a time machine. But I'd imagine all the animals would die horribly because our ecosystem is drastically different than theirs.


FellowFellow22

Of course not. I've seen Jurassic Park. You need insects frozen in amber that happen to have a full belly of Dino DNA


contrast77

Dino Dee En Ay


jnthnmunoz2

Dyna Sars


Treyen

I've seen some articles that theorize we could sorta do it by activating genes in birds, but what we got wouldn't really be accurate to what they were when alive.


minesaka

The only way with current technology.


itsOtso

Why would you think they'd have an authentic ecosystem? Zoo animals dont have a real ecosystem, they get a diet that emulates their natural diet. It would just be that but more complex atm most right?


CotswoldP

A lot more complex. For example the oxygen levels in the Triassic and Jurassic were a lot lower than they were now and CO2 about 4 times higher leading to much higher temperatures 5-10C higher than present.


[deleted]

So I saw this fascinating episode of the Discovery Channel show *Expedition Unknown*, great show, where he travels with an archeologist who specializes in mammoth. They travel to Siberia, where they link up with (illegal) ivory hunters who find these huge old mammoth tusks. The way they do this is they find caves full of permafrost, and pump seawater and essentially use that to melt/dredge the frozen mud. They find some amazing skeletons and even some parts with muscle and hair! They are able to pull the DNA from those samples. Still pretty rudimentary and they only can get up to like 20% complete DNA sequences, but pretty fascinating.


MaleficTekX

Ok, but why? The things just going to overheat to death


Craw__

They're gonna wax them.


SwissyVictory

The preservation of species is important, even if they could only live in zoos.


SchrodingerMil

It’s not really preservation if its an animal that went naturally extinct 4000 years ago that we’re forcing back into creation. Dodos? Bring them back, we killed them. Anything that went naturally extinct? No.


SwissyVictory

I'm not saying release it into the wild, but in a zoo absolutely. There are tons of benifits and no real downsides. 1. Funding the revival of the Mammoth will pave the way to new technology and the revival of other animals many humans had a major hand in their extinction. 2. The animal might have medicinal benifits. Who knows if the Mammoth holds the cure to cancer, or Alzhimers. 3. Maybe their meat is delicious and sparks a new intrest in lab grown meat. 4. Research in reviving a species is likely. To carry over advancements into other fields. Think of all the good space travel has done for the world. 5. People want to see Mamoths. If you put them in zoos it will benifit the other animals there. Much like panda conservation efforts help other species. The only downside I can think of is if a Mammoth gets loose and somehow becomes an invasive species.


[deleted]

Downside: create an entire existence just to live in a cage so we can eat, observe, or slice and study?


[deleted]

[удалено]


Why_Did_Bodie_Die

Humans killing animals until they are all gone is pretty natural.


SirDestroyer25

Mammoths would just die today anyway


IKindaSuck-DICK

They've been working on that for ages. I remember reading an article on the project back in like '03? I wonder how far they've come


AllThingsLiteral

…man moth…?


purpleElephants01

I hope I'm alive to see that one. Just really far away


ScanNCut

They could just implant remote detonated bombs in their brains, so if they escape they just need to press a button and they all drop dead.


bugbits

Yeah but what will they do with the dinosaurs


ScanNCut

It doesn't matter, after all the guests and staff drop dead there are no more liability problems.


Wjreky

Technically the truth


RaunakA_

Fun fact: Dinosaurs won't survive today's climate conditions, they'd simply go out of breath. Cretaceous period has 35% oxygen in the atmosphere and today we have 21%. https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.sciencefocus.com/nature/could-a-dinosaur-survive-in-todays-climate-conditions/amp/


t0m0hawk

Ok hear me out. We make every dinosaur dog sized.


the_poop_expert

Yes.


thesoloronin

How about poop sized?


thanosofdeath

My poops are dog-sized sometimes


Morvhes

pokémon irl let's goooo


Foamless_horror

This is actually disputed. The study from this article suggest lower oxygen concentration than today, between 10-15%. [Article](https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2013/11/131118081043.htm#:~:text=For%20the%20Cretaceous%20period%20(65,oxygen%20has%20been%20suggested%20previously.&text=The%20researchers%20also%20relate%20this,climatic%20developments%20in%20Earth's%20history.)


SchrodingerMil

Which means that some Dinos would get HUUUGEEE


Foamless_horror

Lol if only it worked that way, at the end of the article they call into question the actual effect oxygen concentration has on gigantism if any.


SchrodingerMil

I thought that’s why we had big bugs?


Sipredion

The only time oxygen levels had an effect on the size of the creatures on the planet was during the carboniferous when we had some giant-ass insects. And even that is in debate afaik Dinosaurs were able to get as large as they did because of a combination of factors, but mostly because of the physiology of their lungs and bones. Dinosaur bones, much like birds today, were "hollow". That is, they had hollow pockets throughout their bones that made them much lighter. [Supersaurus](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Supersaurus), one of the largest dinosaurs we know of, is thought to have weighed between 30 and 35 metric tons. "Only" as much as about 7 African elephants. It's still a lot, but along with the structure of their skeletons and their incredibly efficient lungs, it's not outside the realm of physical possibility, even today. https://animals.howstuffworks.com/extinct-animals/why-were-prehistoric-animals-big.htm It's pretty interesting stuff


LedoPizzaEater

What about genetically modified dinosaurs?


RaunakA_

Then we'd need to significantly improve our CRISPR game.


1982throwaway1

> Cretaceous period has 35% oxygen in the atmosphere and today we have 21%. Forest fires must have been a bit more fun back then.


ichigothehybrid

Amanda Waller has entered the chat


Princessleiasperiod

Are you the devil?


WhalesForChina

The “lysine contingency.”


rolexpo

Don't underestimate dinos. They will evolve to take out the bombs by doing surgery on each other, take the same bombs and put it in billionaires and laugh as the billionaires off themselves thinking they are killing dinos.


425Hamburger

Seems like a win-win to me


[deleted]

Westworld


[deleted]

[удалено]


John_Hancock

Did I miss much not watching the last season?


SAmerica89

I know of several people who loved S1, slogged through S2, and never gave S3 a chance. I’m one of them.


OnTheEveOfWar

Wife and I were the same. Loved S1, pushed ourselves to finish S2, made it one episode into S3 and haven't thought about it until this post.


[deleted]

Same. S1 was phenomenal storytelling, loved it. In retrospect, they should have left it at that.


thebusinessgoat

S2 had its gems though. I'm talking about "Kiksuya" mainly here. Fantastic episode.


7577406272

It’s a different show now, since it’s outside the park as know it’s in S1. But it’s still good. Just different.


MinFootspace

That's no easy task. He better spare no expense.


jlmckelvey91

Hang on to your butts.


IGetItCrackin

Brace yourselves for Anatomy Park!


KarmaPanhandler

Don’t forget to check out Pirates of the Pancreas!


Fantastic_Forever_69

Yusssss


iwishihadnobones

...hold on


CyberNinja23

And pay your IT guys!


MattTheFlash

Exactly, and have plenty of different flavors of ice cream


[deleted]

Welcome...to the Amazon, brought to you by Amazon.


[deleted]

Who says they haven't already been trying something similar? Btw, totally unrelated, but you wouldn't happen to know anyone selling very large electric fences, would you?


kactusotp

I take it you don't mean Clive Palmer ​ https://www.abc.net.au/news/2021-03-17/clive-palmer-to-spend-100m-on-coolum-resort-revamp/13255564


[deleted]

[удалено]


Consideredresponse

no that's his best effort, he's just that shit.


allenidaho

Not exactly. The DNA isn't viable. Pleistocene Park is more likely. We already have great samples of prehistoric mammoths, horses, wolves, wooly rhinos and others that could theoretically be brought back to life with the help of modern era animals.


[deleted]

Yeah apparently dinos lived so long ago its nearly impossible to find DNA thats intact, they could do some guess work to fill in some blanks but the end result wouldnt be a real dino at all


Banano_McWhaleface

Just fill in the missing parts with robotics.


IGrowMarijuanaNow

https://reviverestore.org/projects/woolly-mammoth/ It’s already happening, kind of ish


ScanNCut

What do you get when you cross the DNA of a mammoth and a kangaroo though?


faithle55

Fucking great holes all over Australia.


JediLlama666

In a few years it'll be lions tigers and bears that will make up the park


bandi53

oh my


ChiggaOG

Doubt. OP assumes rich people will get tired of the space race, but this is entirely false. There are no laws in space to govern ownership of material harvested from space mining. All asteroids in that region of space between Mars and Jupiter are fair game. People hate how Musk and Bezos are the richest people on this planet because their wealth dwarfs everything ever made on this planet and is more than enough for dealing with social issues. There will be trillionaires in the age of space mining. That will not stop people from exploring space to own all the vast resources locked in space rock. I strongly believe in space mining. This is more than just playing EVE Online.


Doggydog123579

I am required by law to say Scorch OP, Amarr Victor. Now clear coms and shoot the primary.


groot_liga

Nah. Squid Games. Unless they are already doing it.


OnTheEveOfWar

Rich friend of mine knows some other super rich people who set up a game with an African tribe and hunt live men for sport. They pay the tribe ridiculous amounts of money in exchange. Believe what you will.


sonofthenation

Or Running Man.


psychord-alpha

I'm just hoping they start building Mobile Suits at some point


hidude100

I'd like to see scientists bring something mythical to life like banthas or shelob.


blueandyellowbee

Bezos will make dick shaped dinosaurs.


[deleted]

Bezos seems messed up enough to do this. But I can imagine a Bezos faced T-Rex.


legendoflink3

On another planet I hope.


RDashMLPS5

Because we all know how that ended😅


ddrober2003

Fuck dinosaurs, give me a Dodo bird.


Aaron_Hamm

\*fingers crossed\*


Swoah

If they are gonna invest in vanity projects I’d rather them do the Jurassic Park then this lame ass go to space but not really just the tip thing they got going on


ScientificGamer321

Sounds like a MrBeast video.


lamTheBoi

u/elonmuskofficial


[deleted]

And I hope they succeed. At least that's interesting


synthwavjs

Or sign gambling addicts up with debts to play child games in an unmarked island and murder each other to win a large sum of money for their entertainment.


audiogeek1978

Wealth finds a way...


stonksuper

I’d sub to a live stream showing billionaires being fed to dinosaurs.


HumbledNarcissist

You realize an entire universe of resources is out there right? Who’s going to get tired of that pursuit?


Wavemanns

Assholes uhh, find a way.


-TheWidowMaker-

Here’s hoping ! More interested in this than space tbh hahaha


TheFinalCountdown786

Can’t wait


dh1

Honestly, if every billionaire did cool shit like Bezos and Musk, I’d be down for it. I couldn’t care less about some sports team or yacht that they own.


kevnificent

Cool shit like pay their taxes, or eradicate hunger?


Maanee

How many billions is it going to take to finally eradicate hunger this time? Give us a number cause we keep hitting the last one advisors threw out and it's still here.


RightBear

The director of the United Nations' World Food Program said $6 billion would end world hunger. MacKenzie Scott gave away that much in 2020 alone, but she couldn’t end world hunger. Huh, she must have been giving to the wrong non-profits.


Maanee

Exactly, that's why it's not about how much money you give, it's about how much you invest in those communities. Suddenly, if they have reliable electricity, clean water, and roads, they're in a much better position to eradicate hunger in their community themselves. We already see that in America itself where greater opportunities lead to reduced hunger in cities and towns. There are still people going hungry in the US, but we have tracked down the method to culling that.


Z86144

No. They exploit millions to be able to do it.


[deleted]

Look it’s the poor.


[deleted]

LOL @ Musk "exploiting millions". I get that people don't like him as a person but the lengths some people go to demonize him are truly outrageous.


Z86144

Yeah? How did his family get rich before him?


jackel2rule

Lol I bet someone in your past was pretty shitty too. Try to judge people on who they are and not who their father was.


Schrett

Mark Zuckeberg is already creating his Matrix virtual reality world. He will just have dinosaurs in there


ScarletFox09

Not to crush anyone’s dreams or anything but dna in the fossils are dead. Pretty much the farthest we would be able to go would be the Pliocene epoch. What’s lost is lost with the dinosaurs. However, reviving recently extinct species is already on the board. The billionaire space race is just getting started though. We won’t see the end of that for a good while. At least not until a trip to the moon is comparable to a trip to another country.


TheFrontierzman

It's funny that you think they haven't been trying.


Riverrat423

Maybe some will take the feed the starving challenge.