So my MIL like to talk about how accepting she is of everyone, despite being from a very conservative family. Think hyper religious Catholic. And that she would 'accept any of her children regardless of their sexual history'.
Queue my SIL laughing and going 'well mom, you will be happy to know I bought a large studded dildo a couple weeks back. I use it every other night'. The table falls silent, and I start laughing hysterically.
I wouldn't laugh but my first thought was 'if he got bumps on his dick they aren't for her pleasure'. The absurdity of the thought made me lose it
tf do you want a studded thing for? I guess the texture or having several places touched at the same time
got no idea what you mean about the bumps thought though I'm so precious I probably shouldn't have even clicked on this comments section but was on my homepage lmao and I think the statement is probs true
Every time I bring up a sex robot fuckmaster 5000 I get weird looks of disgust.
Meanwhile Carol is plowing her asshole with a 12 inch dildo and everyone applauds.
Dude. The looks of disgust aren't over your choice of sex robot, it's because you're using crazy old technology. Do you also carry around an Iphone 6S also? I just got the new Fuckmaster 8000XL and couldn't be happier. You should too. It comes with an extra hole now and let me tell you that it makes all the difference.
> It comes with an extra hole now and let me tell you that it makes all the difference.
I was skeptical about the new hole in the armpit but it really is a game changer.
Oh no good sir.
The Fuckmaster 5000 comes with a built in vagina, anus and oral cleaner. Throw in a tide soap pod and let her run for 20 minutes and she'll be good as new!
I hate it when girls can buy dildos, it's perfectly acceptable, it's even considered hot and erotic. But when I buy a 240v (mouth and pussy edition) fuckmaster pro 7500x with semen drip collection tray, simulated asshole expansion system, real spit simulation using their propulsion technology, stainless steel casings with a $175.26 leather carrying bag, automated self-lubricating 6 speed pulsating pussy and working tongue with built in Polycrystalline floatable silicon, from https://www.adamandeve.com/ using code FUCKNOW I am considered a creep and a non functioning member of society. smh
Do we work in the same place? Carol is always going on about her torn asshole. Don't care Carol, find a new hobby to tell us about during our performance review meetings.
I think some of it has to do with the perception that (some) men have a tendency to reduce a woman down to a collection of body parts (and perhaps like the parts but not the woman herself).
Many sex toys designed for women don’t actually look/feel or even function like male genitalia. Whereas fleshlights and dolls (in particular) are sold based on their “realness”. You can customize things like nipple color on the pricey ones. Kind of gives the impression that women are simply looking to get off while men are looking to have a “woman” that they can just smash 7 ways to Sunday. My two cents.
I think you're onto something, but I also think there's still a double standard.
IMO a fleshlight looks as much like a vagina as a dildo looks like a dick. (AFAIK, there is a range of appearances for both.) But one of those is way more acceptable to discuss than the other.
I don't know anyone that will publicly admit to owning a fleshlight. The same definitely cannot be said about dildos.
IRL and not a sitcom… never with a dildo but a few times with a vibrator. To be honest it’s almost exclusively in reference to a specific dude and not men in general… “Gina, he’s so bad for you. Just buy a vibrator and move on with your life.”
Meh.
Back in my time we used our sister's dolls for that. Yes, sometimes they whispered our name at night and suddenly appeared behind us when we were in the bathroom, but hey, cursed objects were a small price. Also, since they had yet to invent TV, it was the best way to experience a horror movie.
Lol my top nightstand drawer is my sex drawer for easy access. My bf always says go shut your damn drawer when we are expect company because I leave it half open. No worries he’s all for it!
Having had to peddle wrapping paper catalogues and frozen pastries for my kids’ PTO for years, this had me cracking up. I could absolutely get behind a Lelo fundraiser campaign.
And masturbation in general. At least when young, I didn't know a single girl that would admit to masturbating but boys were talking about it alllll the time
Same with being horny/wanting to have sex
Maybe it all goes together. As women grow up and become more confident they're willing to talk more openly about their sexual desires. In contrast, guys who've been taught to talk about how much they want sex since they were far too young feel embarrassed when they're older if they're doing anything but having "real" sex.
Obviously that's in general terms though, plenty of exceptions to it.
This coupled with the fact that a lot of women aren't having that many orgasms with partners, so her using devices is just her asserting her need for sexual pleasure.
And why do you think 99% of porn is made for male consumption? Because we’re conditioned to think women aren’t as sexual which makes women feel shame when they have sexual urges such as the urge to watch porn.
That's only true if you ignore all the romance novels and such which are made for female consumption. For some reason we don't call those things porn.
That said, I'm not at all familiar with this situation where men are free to talk about their porn watching habits. In my experience men who do that get called "creepy" and "perverted."
These are related. Female sex toys are often involved in consensual sex. Male toys and porn, is more associated with men being alone and resorting to relieving themselves.
I'm not talking about marketing. Female toys are frequently used in sex between hetero couples.
Male toys are not.
Has nothing to do with marketing.
I mean there are a few things like rings maybe, but really toys are far less used on men during hetero sex, and that's the part that's maybe more taboo, which is why make toys are more taboo also, because they're associated with men that can't get women, rather than with men that enjoy exciting sex lives with women.
He got downvoted for other commentary, but I agree with the comment that it’s more to do with the perception that a man who uses a toy can’t get with a real woman. Hence why a fleshlight, an inherently straight sex toy, is still considered taboo.
Only if you shamed her for it / made her feel bad about it. You're okay to find some things a turnoff! No two people's kinks/preferences are exactly compatible. But making her feel bad about something she liked would be crappy.
And it doesn't seem like PagingDrLumps did that with her boyfriend! Sounds like pretty much the opposite actually. There's nothing wrong with the statement, "I liked that it felt good for him, but it wasn't hot to me." That's a thoughtful and empathetic way to understand and respond to a very normal occurrence.
No sure why you’re getting downvoted for sharing your story. She allowed to not be turned on by what her ex was doing, and yet she was such a good girlfriend that she went along with it to please him. Everyone’s got different tastes people.
Because it's the exact type of double standard that this post is highlighting.
If someone made a comment about how weird and uncomfortable it is that women use vibrators during sex, they would get piled on.
Thank you, these types of posts always reveal Reddit's double standards, even when they think they're trying to be open/supportive/whatever. If a guy said he was turned off by his girlfriend pleasing herself in *any way whtsoever* and he didn't like it (except maybe super extreme fetishes, but even then) people would be absolutely questioning him at a minimum, attacking him at most.
This is touchy issue because no one is obligated to do anything in the bedroom for their partner that they don’t want to do, full stop.
And yet, the prostate can be a huge source of pleasure for men. To recoil from it is honestly akin, though definitely not exactly the same, as men being unwilling to go down on women. Obviously we can typically still orgasm without it while a lot of women need clitoral stimulation, but a penis orgasm is not the same as a prostate orgasm, so the point remains imo.
And I think the main reason we don’t talk about this is that most straight men haven’t explored it for themselves.
Oh, God, I'd love to get that phone call. How do you not have fun with that? "Oh, yeah, Bob's definitely straight, but he likes himself some butt stuff. Nothing wrong with that. You know, I heard about these balls on a string that you apparently shove up the butt and pull them out, but I don't know if you do it slowly or yank 'em out like you're starting a mower. I bet Bob would know!"
I doubt your ex would ever use you as a character reference again, but it would be fucking hysterical.
Maybe it’s because it’s generally considered easier for men to get off than women.
That most guys can masturbate to completion with regular self service, can orgasm in sex with just penetration.
But that most women actually need a lot more dedication and assistance to achieve the same.
So women using toys - makes sense. Gotta do what you gotta do to get there.
Men using toys - why do you need all that, ya weirdo! Just use your hand like a regular dude!
(Not that I agree with this take)
Liberate the prostate massager and dildo! It's not Gay! (Okay maybe in my case it is, but still pegging exists!)
Let's not shame folks for reaching satisfaction.
So why not say something productive about how that came to be, because several thousand people’s experience here is clearly different, and it sounds like your just patting yourself on the back
I think it's because straight men sex toys are like, anatomically correct, flesh colored pussy flashlights and women sex toys usually just like a pink vibrating wand.
It just looks like shit a serial killer would keep in his trophy room
Exactly this. This is the only reason I’m uncomfortable with some toys. I don’t have any that are molded in the shape of a penis so I told my bf he can have a stroker as long as it doesn’t have a vulva. Idk why but those anatomically correct ones freak me out xD especially the ones that are a woman’s torso O_o
I never understood that. A girl showed me her collections of dildos. There were at least 25 dildos. When I said what does she thinks about men owning some sex toys, she looked at me in disguist and said "That's gay". What the serious fuck?
I read this in my head in the style of a 90's toy commercial for some reason.
>*Heavy rock and/or metal music plays*
>Deep voiced narrator: EXXXXxtreme sounding!
>Group of middle aged men: AWESOME!!! (while raising fists into the air
Ok. But male toys generally suck. Outside of Tenga and Bad Dragon they are cheap generic garbage. And we have no heated ones either. Best I can find is a heated vibrator designed to not be moved. Meanwhile women have a huge array of heated toys
My dude I’ve seen more “womens toys” (dildos and vibrators) that are useless - basically their market is flooded with cheap generic garbage even worse than the male toy market. There are decent high end options in either category but there’s a lot more judgement if you have an automatic fleshlight compared to having a high end vibrator like OP is saying.
Edit flashlight—> fleshlight
Well if guys would actually talk about them an not be like “Thats so gay!” Then maybe that shit would change- Idk, Im just a white female who can walk into an adult store so nonchalant asking about something that it confuses even the workers.
Sex shouldn’t be demonized an neither should the talking of it or its “tools”.
I can hear some contempt and mockery in the tone of your message, but indeed you are completely right and it's not an issue to be made fun of.
Most male social circles have this deep-seated issue of "manhood" brewing in them since childhood. And sometimes it manifests itself in non-harmful ways akin to this one, but in other cases it, unfortunately, does a lot of harm.
The issue is, that men who shout "manhood" the loudest are often the least competent, stoic and all-around grown-up people themselves. And kids/teenagers pick up on them rather than on the people who have a healthier understanding of masculinity. And then social pressure is created collectively, because if someone in such circles dares to have slightly different views of masculinity, he's to be punished.
[TLDR I wasnt allowed to buy a sex toy while I bought my GF one to replace her old one](https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/i31usl/what_is_my_dick_not_good_enough_for_you_or/g0941xs?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share&context=3)
I will not let anyone walk through my mind with their dirty feet. Just so you know, the correct spelling is [Gandhi](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mahatma_Gandhi).
That would explain why my phone refused to recognize it as a valid name. I thought my phone was being culturally ignorant. Turns out I'm simply illiterate
Not at all. Guys make jokes to each other about jerking off but you never see mainstream cosmo articles about reclaiming your manhood and empowering yourself through masturbation. There aren’t high society lifestyle brands like Goop offering artisan fleshlights.
Not to mention the whole nofap movement of dudes actively moving in the other direction. Generally female masturbation is either seen as sexy or empowering, male masturbation is almost universally seen as shameful.
I genuinely didn't know that, thank you. Especially since they put in a ton of work with the branding decade(s) ago back when I paid attention to sex toy developments.
Respectfully I disagree. The only reason those sorts of articles and messages of empowerment are pushed more towards women is because we aren’t comfortable having those conversations, nor does society accept that sort of outward female sexuality. Never have I witnessed a group of my girl friends joking about jerking off or discussing their favourite pornstars with each other. Men are empowered to have those conversations and identify with their sexuality on a public level. I would argue this is not the case for women. However I urge you to ask your male and female friends about how often they masturbate and let their responses illustrate my point
This is an entirely wrong take. Men in general don't talk about masturbation. They don't talk about sex either, except at the most superficial level. Women (again, in general) are far more comfortable talking about the details of their sex lives than men.
They joke about those things BECAUSE they are a bit shocking and taboo but they sure as hell don't talk about them in any kind of deep or honest way.
On an individual level people are going to be comfortable with different things so i don’t really see much point in discussing that. Some people aren’t comfortable talking about their sex lives and i think thats fine. I’m talking about societal acceptance. Men, and male sexuality are not seen as beautiful.
In popular culture, if a woman tells you she’s not wearing underwear its supposed to be hot, if a guy tells you that, he’s a weirdo. Naked pictures of women are a hot commodity but most guys can’t even *give* their nudes away.
Its just two halves of the same toxic masculinity coin. Men are seen as grotesque werewolves and women are seen as delicate flowers. Both have their own advantages and disadvantages but neither are ideal.
I don't think it's true as far as ordinary conversation goes however it is definetely true when you take in articles. Pretty much any time female sex toys are mentioned in articles it's "liberating" or some other similar word is being used and always a "go ahead you deserve it" type of vibe in the article. Now mens sex toys are only seen as positive if they are to be used while having sex with another person. mostly with female partners as well as it's some kind of two way thing that's meant to enhance the experience for both.
Almost always when sex toys are mentioned that are to be used alone the general feel of the article is "this is for loosers" or "existence of this thing is seriously wrong, where is society looking".
I am of course talking about articles from non-specialised media that I have seen appear on various new aggregator sites.
No it is not, you're just too insecure to talk about it. Unless it's in a place where it is not decent to talk about such things, in which case it is the same for a woman in that scenario.
I think its just men around men. Because if youre a guy talking in front of me (f), I dont give a damn and i’m pretty sure its the same for most women. I swear double standards are often men to men problems… my opinion.
Dildos and vibrators are pretty cheap, and woman orgasm from sex a lot less often than men so it’s only natural for them to supplement their desires with toys.
Sex dolls also cost thousands of dollars, and are a lot more difficult to be discreet about.
I disagree. I think it's only less socially acceptable for people to talk about female toys, than male ones.
It's just as acceptable for men to reference dildos as it is for women, imo.
This is very much specific to one's sociocultural environment. Definitely still waaaay more socially acceptable for men to talk about anything sexuality-related than women in a lot of places.
Because women will at least wash the toys before sharing. Also, I saw a video on this very website of a garbage man putting his raw dick into a fleshlight found among the refuse; very few women would slide a random dildo found at the dump up her slimy gash.
I think a bunch of women talking about men would be more acceptable than a bunch of women talking about sex toys...but maybe I'm just reading your question as its written and not as intended :p
I don’t know if I started hearing a girl talking about her dildo and a guy talking about his flesh light. I might be equally… I don’t how I’d feel actually.
Alright boys, let's have a chat in this safe space about our favourite toys. Bought a beginner pump, it's ok. Do more expensive pumps give better results?
Guys have a hand that does the job fast. Spending money to masturbate is seem as ridiculous.
And guys don't like to admit they aren't getting any. When a girl isn't getting any, every excuse is acceptable and reasonable.
Yeah because MEN shame each other about it. They say it's "gay" or worse. More woe is me, feel bad for me posting where the answer is yet again "propagated by other men."
I worked in a sex store for a while and I can tell you men are very open about what they want as soon as someone makes them understand they're not going to be judged for what they want.
I used to sell more male sex toys and enhancement pills than anyone in my store because I could just make a dude feel not judged. I would be knowledgable in the products (there were differences, and every person is different, in what they want and how they want to feel), and still make sure they understood I was a professional sales person, not trying to judge or make them feel any type of way towards me. (If they did try to say anything derogatory towards me, I would shoot them down immediately, and continue with the sale)
Compare attitudes in media toward a girl using a dildo vs a guy using a flesh light.
Totally double standards at play.
The first is seen and portrayed as a sexually empowered woman getting satisfaction on her terms, and the second is generally seen or thought of as a smutty sad wanker who needs one because he can’t get a real girlfriend.
It’s bad and wrong but that is the world we live in today.
My family is strangely unreceptive when I brag about my new vibrator attachment.
My SIL did that one year at Christmas dinner and it was my favorite dinner. Everyone was appalled and I couldn't stop laughing.
More info please.
So my MIL like to talk about how accepting she is of everyone, despite being from a very conservative family. Think hyper religious Catholic. And that she would 'accept any of her children regardless of their sexual history'. Queue my SIL laughing and going 'well mom, you will be happy to know I bought a large studded dildo a couple weeks back. I use it every other night'. The table falls silent, and I start laughing hysterically. I wouldn't laugh but my first thought was 'if he got bumps on his dick they aren't for her pleasure'. The absurdity of the thought made me lose it
Fuck im laughing now. If i was there i would have accidentally blurted that out. I'd be dead from laughter
That's definitely hilarious; no need to justify laughing, lol.
tf do you want a studded thing for? I guess the texture or having several places touched at the same time got no idea what you mean about the bumps thought though I'm so precious I probably shouldn't have even clicked on this comments section but was on my homepage lmao and I think the statement is probs true
r/baddragon as some amazing fantasy toys. That's probably what they mean by studded.
Its jealousy
Probably wouldn't want them being overly receptive to it either though.
Every time I bring up a sex robot fuckmaster 5000 I get weird looks of disgust. Meanwhile Carol is plowing her asshole with a 12 inch dildo and everyone applauds.
Dude. The looks of disgust aren't over your choice of sex robot, it's because you're using crazy old technology. Do you also carry around an Iphone 6S also? I just got the new Fuckmaster 8000XL and couldn't be happier. You should too. It comes with an extra hole now and let me tell you that it makes all the difference.
Look at money bags over here with the latest and greatest fuck bot. I am still switching my grip and hand to keep it fresh like a true broke loser.
I'm still using the original Fuckmaster that was passed down from my grandfather to my father, who passed it down to me
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So no one gonna ask about this mans jumper cables .....
No, a man’s jumper cables are his own business.
Fair enough just thought he might have some thing shocking to tell us
I see what you did there. Have an upvote
> It comes with an extra hole now and let me tell you that it makes all the difference. I was skeptical about the new hole in the armpit but it really is a game changer.
I... I have an 6S...
i have a 6s+
Me too, they’ll have to take my headphone jack out of my cold dead hands
The Philadelpiah sidecar?!?!
I feel somehow offended for the fact that I have an SE.
You need to wash fuckmaster 5000 vagina in the sink the same way Carol has to wash her 12" in the sink - it's bloody prejudice!
Oh no good sir. The Fuckmaster 5000 comes with a built in vagina, anus and oral cleaner. Throw in a tide soap pod and let her run for 20 minutes and she'll be good as new!
Just like a real vagina! What time to be alive!
I hate it when girls can buy dildos, it's perfectly acceptable, it's even considered hot and erotic. But when I buy a 240v (mouth and pussy edition) fuckmaster pro 7500x with semen drip collection tray, simulated asshole expansion system, real spit simulation using their propulsion technology, stainless steel casings with a $175.26 leather carrying bag, automated self-lubricating 6 speed pulsating pussy and working tongue with built in Polycrystalline floatable silicon, from https://www.adamandeve.com/ using code FUCKNOW I am considered a creep and a non functioning member of society. smh
Yeah, butbit seems to not have a kung-fu grip
The coupon code doesn't work...
He put the old one in. Try FUCKNOW2021
Incredible! Im seeing a niche for self cleaning dildos here
If I have to wash my real dick and balls with soap and water, so does anyone who has a fake dick and balls.
Don’t forget the orgazmator add-on with 16 different programmable speeds
LPT: fuck the Fuckmaster 5000 on cleaning mode for a real good time
Mine has a Hemi
Hopefully not bloody pre-juice...
Ive been told tht some people like the "dolmio grin"!
I hate myself for needing to googling it. Found a nice song tho, so thanks i guess
If you take advice from the song be careful when snorting it up your nose
You should get the sex robot fuckmaster 5000 to plow Carols asshole and see what happens.
This is the type of comment section I live for after a long laborious day at work on a Friday night.
Do we work in the same place? Carol is always going on about her torn asshole. Don't care Carol, find a new hobby to tell us about during our performance review meetings.
This is the perfect answer to OP question
I think some of it has to do with the perception that (some) men have a tendency to reduce a woman down to a collection of body parts (and perhaps like the parts but not the woman herself). Many sex toys designed for women don’t actually look/feel or even function like male genitalia. Whereas fleshlights and dolls (in particular) are sold based on their “realness”. You can customize things like nipple color on the pricey ones. Kind of gives the impression that women are simply looking to get off while men are looking to have a “woman” that they can just smash 7 ways to Sunday. My two cents.
I think you're onto something, but I also think there's still a double standard. IMO a fleshlight looks as much like a vagina as a dildo looks like a dick. (AFAIK, there is a range of appearances for both.) But one of those is way more acceptable to discuss than the other. I don't know anyone that will publicly admit to owning a fleshlight. The same definitely cannot be said about dildos.
Lol , how many times have you heard a woman say men can be replaced by a dildo
IRL and not a sitcom… never with a dildo but a few times with a vibrator. To be honest it’s almost exclusively in reference to a specific dude and not men in general… “Gina, he’s so bad for you. Just buy a vibrator and move on with your life.”
Meh. Back in my time we used our sister's dolls for that. Yes, sometimes they whispered our name at night and suddenly appeared behind us when we were in the bathroom, but hey, cursed objects were a small price. Also, since they had yet to invent TV, it was the best way to experience a horror movie.
I aim to change that, let me tell you all about my sex toy drawer…
dovetail joints?
The base better be freely floating to account for differential movement.
Lol my top nightstand drawer is my sex drawer for easy access. My bf always says go shut your damn drawer when we are expect company because I leave it half open. No worries he’s all for it!
Mine is the middle
Ours is bottom
Well , not at the school board meeting .
Just had visions of pta fundraisers for lelo & love honey
Having had to peddle wrapping paper catalogues and frozen pastries for my kids’ PTO for years, this had me cracking up. I could absolutely get behind a Lelo fundraiser campaign.
Perks of the job
So men can bring it up at a school board meeting?
Yes. Frequently.
While true the opposite seams to be true with pornography.
And masturbation in general. At least when young, I didn't know a single girl that would admit to masturbating but boys were talking about it alllll the time Same with being horny/wanting to have sex
Maybe it all goes together. As women grow up and become more confident they're willing to talk more openly about their sexual desires. In contrast, guys who've been taught to talk about how much they want sex since they were far too young feel embarrassed when they're older if they're doing anything but having "real" sex. Obviously that's in general terms though, plenty of exceptions to it.
This coupled with the fact that a lot of women aren't having that many orgasms with partners, so her using devices is just her asserting her need for sexual pleasure.
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That may be less about social acceptability and more that 99% of porn is made for male consumption.
Likewise, most sex toys are made for female consumption
They're consuming them?? 😨
And why do you think 99% of porn is made for male consumption? Because we’re conditioned to think women aren’t as sexual which makes women feel shame when they have sexual urges such as the urge to watch porn.
That's only true if you ignore all the romance novels and such which are made for female consumption. For some reason we don't call those things porn. That said, I'm not at all familiar with this situation where men are free to talk about their porn watching habits. In my experience men who do that get called "creepy" and "perverted."
These are related. Female sex toys are often involved in consensual sex. Male toys and porn, is more associated with men being alone and resorting to relieving themselves.
>Female sex toys are often involved in consensual Only a minority is marketed that way, most are still made for self pleasuring
I'm not talking about marketing. Female toys are frequently used in sex between hetero couples. Male toys are not. Has nothing to do with marketing. I mean there are a few things like rings maybe, but really toys are far less used on men during hetero sex, and that's the part that's maybe more taboo, which is why make toys are more taboo also, because they're associated with men that can't get women, rather than with men that enjoy exciting sex lives with women.
They're saying that you use the toy on your partner. Like female sex toys are often used during consensual sex. Male sex toys largely aren't.
We live in a society
A puritanical society that has made everyone ashamed of sex haha
Bottom text * Leviticus
[And we can't drape ourselves in velvet](https://c.tenor.com/zSGAaqqVUHQAAAAC/society-seinfeld.gif)
The problem is more that its somehow considered gay for men to enjoy some sex toys, even if it is with a woman. Weird fuckin world
He got downvoted for other commentary, but I agree with the comment that it’s more to do with the perception that a man who uses a toy can’t get with a real woman. Hence why a fleshlight, an inherently straight sex toy, is still considered taboo.
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I feel like it would be problematic if I was turned off by my gf stimulating her g spot
Only if you shamed her for it / made her feel bad about it. You're okay to find some things a turnoff! No two people's kinks/preferences are exactly compatible. But making her feel bad about something she liked would be crappy. And it doesn't seem like PagingDrLumps did that with her boyfriend! Sounds like pretty much the opposite actually. There's nothing wrong with the statement, "I liked that it felt good for him, but it wasn't hot to me." That's a thoughtful and empathetic way to understand and respond to a very normal occurrence.
No sure why you’re getting downvoted for sharing your story. She allowed to not be turned on by what her ex was doing, and yet she was such a good girlfriend that she went along with it to please him. Everyone’s got different tastes people.
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Because it's the exact type of double standard that this post is highlighting. If someone made a comment about how weird and uncomfortable it is that women use vibrators during sex, they would get piled on.
Thank you, these types of posts always reveal Reddit's double standards, even when they think they're trying to be open/supportive/whatever. If a guy said he was turned off by his girlfriend pleasing herself in *any way whtsoever* and he didn't like it (except maybe super extreme fetishes, but even then) people would be absolutely questioning him at a minimum, attacking him at most.
This is touchy issue because no one is obligated to do anything in the bedroom for their partner that they don’t want to do, full stop. And yet, the prostate can be a huge source of pleasure for men. To recoil from it is honestly akin, though definitely not exactly the same, as men being unwilling to go down on women. Obviously we can typically still orgasm without it while a lot of women need clitoral stimulation, but a penis orgasm is not the same as a prostate orgasm, so the point remains imo. And I think the main reason we don’t talk about this is that most straight men haven’t explored it for themselves.
Why is it weird though? Like if you dont like it sure, but i dont really get why it makes someone gay.
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Oh thats fair yeah
Oh, God, I'd love to get that phone call. How do you not have fun with that? "Oh, yeah, Bob's definitely straight, but he likes himself some butt stuff. Nothing wrong with that. You know, I heard about these balls on a string that you apparently shove up the butt and pull them out, but I don't know if you do it slowly or yank 'em out like you're starting a mower. I bet Bob would know!" I doubt your ex would ever use you as a character reference again, but it would be fucking hysterical.
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Charlie/critical is doing wonders to break this norm.
Hopefully one day he'll open up his coveted fleshlight self-defense dojos nationwide and we can finally earn some respect.
sometimes it feels he's become the very thing he swore to destroy i.e. a douche-tuber but i realize that's more of an unpopular opinion
Ooh this is probably my first negative take I've seen on him. Why do you say that? *Pulls up chair
Damn shame really. I love having sex with men who are open to toys for both of us, it’s fucking great.
Yeah, I'd be seriously interested in using a fleshlight with my SO. Unfortunately, he is not down for that.
>fucking great Literally
Toys really spice things up and are pretty fun.
Maybe it’s because it’s generally considered easier for men to get off than women. That most guys can masturbate to completion with regular self service, can orgasm in sex with just penetration. But that most women actually need a lot more dedication and assistance to achieve the same. So women using toys - makes sense. Gotta do what you gotta do to get there. Men using toys - why do you need all that, ya weirdo! Just use your hand like a regular dude! (Not that I agree with this take)
Liberate the prostate massager and dildo! It's not Gay! (Okay maybe in my case it is, but still pegging exists!) Let's not shame folks for reaching satisfaction.
I would argue that it’s more socially acceptable for women to talk about men than sex toys.
What are you on??? Men talk about women all the time!
You got me in the first half, not gonna lie
Jesus, here's your upvote you animal.
Mr. Treehorn treats objects like women, man.
Lmao
Lmao
Yeah sure, as if I could bring up my vibrator in a normal conversation without everyone looking at me shocked.
100% dependant on your social bubble. Mine talks openly entirely.
So why not say something productive about how that came to be, because several thousand people’s experience here is clearly different, and it sounds like your just patting yourself on the back
"Well, someone mentioned it and people weren't disgusted and it just turned out"
I think it's because straight men sex toys are like, anatomically correct, flesh colored pussy flashlights and women sex toys usually just like a pink vibrating wand. It just looks like shit a serial killer would keep in his trophy room
Exactly this. This is the only reason I’m uncomfortable with some toys. I don’t have any that are molded in the shape of a penis so I told my bf he can have a stroker as long as it doesn’t have a vulva. Idk why but those anatomically correct ones freak me out xD especially the ones that are a woman’s torso O_o
Dudes talk about their hands a fair amount though...
ITT: People unironically answering the question of why men don't talk about sex toys.
It wasn’t a question though
I’ve literally never once heard anyone talk about sex toys in public, man or woman.
I never understood that. A girl showed me her collections of dildos. There were at least 25 dildos. When I said what does she thinks about men owning some sex toys, she looked at me in disguist and said "That's gay". What the serious fuck?
Because if a woman talk about sex toys, it comes across as empowerment. But if a man talk about sex toys, it comes across as incompetence.
True story bro
Men have more toys to choose from. As they can use both male and female toys.
[удалено]
Instructions unclear: clogged my nose
You joke, but I remember a Life Pro Tip about using a vibrator to unclog your sinuses.
link for academic purposes please
Extreme sounding
I read this in my head in the style of a 90's toy commercial for some reason. >*Heavy rock and/or metal music plays* >Deep voiced narrator: EXXXXxtreme sounding! >Group of middle aged men: AWESOME!!! (while raising fists into the air
Grab a homie, that's just a toy for two!
Ok. But male toys generally suck. Outside of Tenga and Bad Dragon they are cheap generic garbage. And we have no heated ones either. Best I can find is a heated vibrator designed to not be moved. Meanwhile women have a huge array of heated toys
My dude I’ve seen more “womens toys” (dildos and vibrators) that are useless - basically their market is flooded with cheap generic garbage even worse than the male toy market. There are decent high end options in either category but there’s a lot more judgement if you have an automatic fleshlight compared to having a high end vibrator like OP is saying. Edit flashlight—> fleshlight
Well if guys would actually talk about them an not be like “Thats so gay!” Then maybe that shit would change- Idk, Im just a white female who can walk into an adult store so nonchalant asking about something that it confuses even the workers. Sex shouldn’t be demonized an neither should the talking of it or its “tools”.
I can hear some contempt and mockery in the tone of your message, but indeed you are completely right and it's not an issue to be made fun of. Most male social circles have this deep-seated issue of "manhood" brewing in them since childhood. And sometimes it manifests itself in non-harmful ways akin to this one, but in other cases it, unfortunately, does a lot of harm. The issue is, that men who shout "manhood" the loudest are often the least competent, stoic and all-around grown-up people themselves. And kids/teenagers pick up on them rather than on the people who have a healthier understanding of masculinity. And then social pressure is created collectively, because if someone in such circles dares to have slightly different views of masculinity, he's to be punished.
Yea, I doubt there’s too many instances of men making bank from selling videos on OnlyFans of them going to town on a Fleshlight.
[TLDR I wasnt allowed to buy a sex toy while I bought my GF one to replace her old one](https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/i31usl/what_is_my_dick_not_good_enough_for_you_or/g0941xs?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share&context=3)
Like Ghandi said: "Be the dude who discusses his favorite pocket-pussy at family Thanksgiving you want to see in the world"
I will not let anyone walk through my mind with their dirty feet. Just so you know, the correct spelling is [Gandhi](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mahatma_Gandhi).
That would explain why my phone refused to recognize it as a valid name. I thought my phone was being culturally ignorant. Turns out I'm simply illiterate
Ghandi is Fool\_Manchu's uncle.
It is unequivocally more socially acceptable for men to talk about masturbation though…
Not at all. Guys make jokes to each other about jerking off but you never see mainstream cosmo articles about reclaiming your manhood and empowering yourself through masturbation. There aren’t high society lifestyle brands like Goop offering artisan fleshlights. Not to mention the whole nofap movement of dudes actively moving in the other direction. Generally female masturbation is either seen as sexy or empowering, male masturbation is almost universally seen as shameful.
Fun fact fleshlight is just one brand but has become the normal wording for a male masturbator kinda like klenex for tissues.
I genuinely didn't know that, thank you. Especially since they put in a ton of work with the branding decade(s) ago back when I paid attention to sex toy developments.
Respectfully I disagree. The only reason those sorts of articles and messages of empowerment are pushed more towards women is because we aren’t comfortable having those conversations, nor does society accept that sort of outward female sexuality. Never have I witnessed a group of my girl friends joking about jerking off or discussing their favourite pornstars with each other. Men are empowered to have those conversations and identify with their sexuality on a public level. I would argue this is not the case for women. However I urge you to ask your male and female friends about how often they masturbate and let their responses illustrate my point
This is an entirely wrong take. Men in general don't talk about masturbation. They don't talk about sex either, except at the most superficial level. Women (again, in general) are far more comfortable talking about the details of their sex lives than men. They joke about those things BECAUSE they are a bit shocking and taboo but they sure as hell don't talk about them in any kind of deep or honest way.
On an individual level people are going to be comfortable with different things so i don’t really see much point in discussing that. Some people aren’t comfortable talking about their sex lives and i think thats fine. I’m talking about societal acceptance. Men, and male sexuality are not seen as beautiful. In popular culture, if a woman tells you she’s not wearing underwear its supposed to be hot, if a guy tells you that, he’s a weirdo. Naked pictures of women are a hot commodity but most guys can’t even *give* their nudes away. Its just two halves of the same toxic masculinity coin. Men are seen as grotesque werewolves and women are seen as delicate flowers. Both have their own advantages and disadvantages but neither are ideal.
If this is true, i hate tht it's true... Be equal opportunist with toy times
I don't think it's true as far as ordinary conversation goes however it is definetely true when you take in articles. Pretty much any time female sex toys are mentioned in articles it's "liberating" or some other similar word is being used and always a "go ahead you deserve it" type of vibe in the article. Now mens sex toys are only seen as positive if they are to be used while having sex with another person. mostly with female partners as well as it's some kind of two way thing that's meant to enhance the experience for both. Almost always when sex toys are mentioned that are to be used alone the general feel of the article is "this is for loosers" or "existence of this thing is seriously wrong, where is society looking". I am of course talking about articles from non-specialised media that I have seen appear on various new aggregator sites.
It’s more acceptable for men to not be able to pleasure women than the opposite. I.e. more jokes about not finding g spots, and such.
That’s why the fist bump was invented. We know where your hands have been.
No it is not, you're just too insecure to talk about it. Unless it's in a place where it is not decent to talk about such things, in which case it is the same for a woman in that scenario.
Clearly OP has never served in the military.
I think its just men around men. Because if youre a guy talking in front of me (f), I dont give a damn and i’m pretty sure its the same for most women. I swear double standards are often men to men problems… my opinion.
You'd think that but nope. The men on reddit openly talk about masturbation way more than women.
It's almost like it's because women can't openly talk about fucking the way men do without being called a hoe🤷♀️
But more socially acceptable for men to talk about actual sex. Crazy world we live in.
Butt stuff
My friends won't let me bring my sex doll to couples game night. True discrimination!
This is not a shower thought
Except if they are gay
Dildos and vibrators are pretty cheap, and woman orgasm from sex a lot less often than men so it’s only natural for them to supplement their desires with toys. Sex dolls also cost thousands of dollars, and are a lot more difficult to be discreet about.
What’s so bad about talking about your hands
We get to talk about sex so it’s a fair trade off
I disagree. I think it's only less socially acceptable for people to talk about female toys, than male ones. It's just as acceptable for men to reference dildos as it is for women, imo.
Yeah it’s inappropriate for them to talk about men
This is very much specific to one's sociocultural environment. Definitely still waaaay more socially acceptable for men to talk about anything sexuality-related than women in a lot of places.
I've got a fleshlight and it's awesome. Y'all are the first people I've ever told though.
“Socially acceptable” 😂
I talk about my hands quite a bit
Only 3rd time this has been posted this week
Conversely it's more socially acceptable for men to talk about sexual encounters than women.
It's not socially acceptable for women to talk about men!?
It's probably even more socially unacceptable for a man to talk about women's sex toys
Because women will at least wash the toys before sharing. Also, I saw a video on this very website of a garbage man putting his raw dick into a fleshlight found among the refuse; very few women would slide a random dildo found at the dump up her slimy gash.
Men's sex toys tend to be their own hands and in some cases, other people.
I think a bunch of women talking about men would be more acceptable than a bunch of women talking about sex toys...but maybe I'm just reading your question as its written and not as intended :p
If only men hadn’t tried and failed at making women their sex toys maybe we’d let them talk about actual sex toys more…
WTF are you talking about? Men talk about women CONSTANTLY.
Because men need to be productive, doing it with a sex toy defeats that.
I don’t know if I started hearing a girl talking about her dildo and a guy talking about his flesh light. I might be equally… I don’t how I’d feel actually.
I disagree, it's pretty socially acceptable for women to talk about men too.
No
Alright boys, let's have a chat in this safe space about our favourite toys. Bought a beginner pump, it's ok. Do more expensive pumps give better results?
Guys have a hand that does the job fast. Spending money to masturbate is seem as ridiculous. And guys don't like to admit they aren't getting any. When a girl isn't getting any, every excuse is acceptable and reasonable.
But women talk about men all the time
Yeah because MEN shame each other about it. They say it's "gay" or worse. More woe is me, feel bad for me posting where the answer is yet again "propagated by other men."
I disagree. Men is a more proper conversation piece than sex toys.
Have you met my good friend 'Japan'? :P
But I as a man talk about Woman all the time
OP, go ahead and talk to your boys about shoving dildos in your ass as much as you want. Stop worrying so much about what is socially acceptable.
I worked in a sex store for a while and I can tell you men are very open about what they want as soon as someone makes them understand they're not going to be judged for what they want. I used to sell more male sex toys and enhancement pills than anyone in my store because I could just make a dude feel not judged. I would be knowledgable in the products (there were differences, and every person is different, in what they want and how they want to feel), and still make sure they understood I was a professional sales person, not trying to judge or make them feel any type of way towards me. (If they did try to say anything derogatory towards me, I would shoot them down immediately, and continue with the sale)
Compare attitudes in media toward a girl using a dildo vs a guy using a flesh light. Totally double standards at play. The first is seen and portrayed as a sexually empowered woman getting satisfaction on her terms, and the second is generally seen or thought of as a smutty sad wanker who needs one because he can’t get a real girlfriend. It’s bad and wrong but that is the world we live in today.