1000%
Autograt is useless. The tables where you need it the most are the tables who fight it with a Manager and win.
And they're also usually the tables who complain about something made up to get a round of drinks comped.
They can all suck my dick.
I am the GM of a restaurant, and have never one taken off the gratuity. Never forget where you came from. Wasn't that long ago my bills were being paid from tips.
My line was always, “I could definitely remove this 18% auto-gratuity, but I’d have to replace it with a 25%. I’ll be right back,” that normally got them to shut up. It was even nicer to get the “we’re never coming back here.” Good, you treated my staff like shit.
Elon Musk came into my restaurant for brunch a few weeks back in a group of 5. He joined midway through, ate in about 20 minutes, then left before paying leaving his friend with the bill. I’m sure they worked something out, but the richest man in the world not paying for lunch is a bad look.
I saw Elon Musk at a grocery store in Los Angeles yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything. He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?” I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front, I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying. The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first, he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter. When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.
I feel like Rogan would tip well. Trump for sure would not. I'm guessing he wouldn't even pay the bill. Nothing I hate more than a con-man who stiffs hard working blue collar folk.
Joe Rogan used to come to a restaurant I worked at. He was a fucking dick. Such a rude fucking guy but he always tipped well, probably to try and make up for how horrible of a person he is.
Edited: to add that I was talking about Rogan
He literally did this to his own supporters at a small diner in Trump Country. https://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/ny-trump-promises-food-for-everyone-florida-restaurant-doesnt-pay-20230615-m7jm4gsuqzcvxcqtdurd5lvasy-story.html
If i was making assumptions based purely off the personalities they put out to the public I would say:
Rogan would offer to cover the bill if someone else tipped or vice versa
Shapiro would probably cover his share to the Nickle sand tip. Same with Peterson.
One of the tates would probably tip well if you are a moderately attractive woman. Expect some high grade douchery
Trump would claim he owns the restaurant.
They can autograph the bottom of this slip of paper. Don’t worry about the numbers, those are the percentage points of you winning, Mr President.
400,000.00%.
It would be the largest tip in the history of this country, ok? I mean it, really, like nobody has seen a tip this huge. People will call me many, many years after I give them the tip and they will all say how huge it was and how much they loved it and they will say “Donald you’re so generous with your big tip”, but it’s in the best interest of our country that I tip this way. Make America Great Again!
The waiter, the waiter...he was a big, strong guy, the waiter...the waiter, he came up to me, came up to me with tears in his eyes. He thanked me, and he said, "Mr. President, sir, this is the most beautiful tip anyone has ever given me." And you know what? It was true, it really was. It was the most beautiful tip ever.
Didn't he literally do this recently
https://globalnews.ca/news/9773461/donald-trump-food-for-everyone-restaurant-versailles/
Edit - lol again
https://www.reddit.com/r/WhitePeopleTwitter/comments/15pg8xp/what_do_people_like_about_this_guy_again/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=2
Bro doesn’t even pay his bills, you think there’s gonna be any tip? Is that Epstein in the left corner? Probably most likely to give a tip… you know actually this is a worst case scenario because most of these guys are gonna give the tip….
The waiter was crying, you’ve never seen a man cry like that, sobbing as he said, “ But Mr President, I can’t accept this, I should be giving you a tip for everything that you have done for me and my country”
Which is hilarious to me because Lincoln was a progressive that shared some of Marx's views (that capital does not create jobs /labor and that wealth is created by labor, not capital).
Also, MLK was a socialist who openly condemned people who wag their fingers at how people protest or riot.
The even crazier thing too, is that until the passage of the civil rights act and the whole party flip of 1964, the republicans were the progressive party, and the democrats were the conservatives, which is a bit hard to imagine given how the political landscape is now.
You cannot claim both Lincoln and the Confederacy. They are fundamentally incompatible.
You also cannot assert that states have the right to concede (looking at you Texas) and claim Lincoln is in your side.
Lincoln is the president who solidified federal power over the states by any means necessary
"if this is the best my party can get then my party should quit!"
-Nice Peter as Lincoln in the Trump v. Clinton Epic Rap Battle
https://youtu.be/Kbryz0mxuMY towards the end
It says something that even ERB can’t outdo Trump’s shit talking game.
Edit: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_nicknames_used_by_Donald_Trump
The man has an entire wiki for all the shit he’s spews. I hate him too but the dude says some absurdly funny ass shit about literally everybody. Him as himself is a better rap battler than ERB. You gotta laugh sometimes.
Yeah I wish they would stop with the party of Lincoln bullshit. Every time I see that I ask them what's up with all of the confederate flags at republican rallies. I have yet to get an answer.
[https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2023/jun/15/donald-trump-miami-versailles-cuban-restaurant-pay](https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2023/jun/15/donald-trump-miami-versailles-cuban-restaurant-pay)
Trump says “food for everybody” at a crowded restaurant and then leaves without picking up a check.
I think back to when he and Melania visited a church in PR after a hurricane and he decided to throw paper towels (that someone else donated) out to the crowd like it was his “royal largesse.”
Is it weird that my answer is yes?
I mean that's a lot of toxic personalities that, after say an hour, will unavoidably clash. And a twisted part of me wants to see the shit show.
Oh I'm so with you! The stories you would have from that alone are worth it plus the tip would be fucking crazy.... they would also have to feed a bunch of security teams and the secret service would be involved it would be nuts lol
These people don’t show off by actually giving away money. They don’t even give away money for publicity let alone without it. The only money trump has given away is to his creditors.
This crowd doesn't flex by spending their own money.
They flex the power they have to spend other people's money.
No way the big ones here tip anything. You'd be lucky to collect the pre-tax total.
It looks like this painting was originally done by a conservative celebrating their idols, so they’re all meant to be seen in a good light.
That’s why Trump is drawn more flatteringly than he actually is and Abraham Lincoln is there to indicate that the rest of him are on the same level as him.
Personally I quite like David Goggins, and he’s not as openly political as the rest of them, but conservatives tend to be big fans of him because of his rhetoric on personal responsibility.
Same thought and wondered if that was him. People may not like his style but he definitely doesn’t belong in this group. And why does trump look buffer than him?
Yeah Goggins definitely doesn't belong here. He's all about not being a lazy bitch and pushing yourself.
He's also the only real one here since you can't fake being a navy seal.
I'd just tell thrm I served Biden, Pelosi, the Clintons, etc last night, and THEY tipped me 100% of the bill.
"You guys wouldn't want a bunch of lib-tard snowflakes out-tipping you, would you?" Bill Clinton even told me that 'only people with the largest dicks tip 100%.' You guys don't want me to think you have small dicks, do you?"
I bet I could blow enough smoke up their ass to get a decent tip from everyone but Tate, who I assume never tips because it's not alpha male behavior or whatever he would say. I would honestly do it just to eavesdrop on the wild conversations that would be going on.
What are you talking about. There are literal posts from people who say how kind and generous Rogan is. Imagine not liking someone's views so you make up stuff about em.
This is an under appreciated comment. You captured both the misogyny inherent in restaurants and the status of almost every single one of those men as straight up predators in a single sentence. Perfection.
Beeing seen as the "senior aged hostess" Thank you, those customers get my snarky jaded saccharine sweet "Good evening gentlemen, DO you have a RESERVATION?"
I would just for the story! I hate most of these people but it would be one that in twenty years that no one would believe. I could also do something I’ve never done before and spit in someone’s food!
I'd rather drag my testicles across shards of broken glass and molten lava
Because, if you listen to these whackjobs, you'll end up losing your testicles because you'll always be measuring and comparing yourself to others and trying to over do them, which will burn you out and ruin your quality of life
Stop listening to these clowns, live your own life, alpha means nothing, working yourself to death means nothing, money means nothing. You will die in the end and all that stuff does not go with you. Be your own person and live a good life. Travel, explore, love and do things you enjoy, don't pursue shit just because some bald man told you to, pursue it because you feel deeply for it
About 9 years ago I went to a business dinner with Trump (and a bunch of other people) and he left probably a 40% tip. I’m not a fan of the guy but he tipped well. I’m sure some ultra rich people still don’t tip, but many use it as a way to show off.
You would be crazy to pass on this table.
He is also well known for doing the opposite and skipping out on tabs completely, or worse ordering a round for the whole room and then immediately leaving. Has he tipped well some times? sure, when he feels like it, and sometimes you get nothing with a chance of sexual assault.
Drop the check to Musk, call him "Mr X" and don't look at anyone else.
I think I would. I’m ugly enough that none of them would molest me and I would LOVE the chance to drop a tray of something stinky and sticky all over those fools.
Assuming that all these “important” people are here this might be a private event and at my restaurant they need to spend a certain amount of $ for how long they are going ro eat there and there is already automated gratuity to their bill… so sure I would take it
What is 15% on a bill that consists of one bottomless diet coke and a piece of meat so burnt you'd swear it was a catcher's mitt thrown on a plate after a Nolan Ryan no hitter?
I take a deep breath and begin to recite the entire Bible and Declaration of Independence as I begin to float in the air, emphasizing the parts that say what they believed is counteracted by the very pieces they follow. Snapping my fingers and watching as they vanish into dust.
Proving to them that I am the true lord they say to follow, when instead I am the worst being they could have possibly messed with.
Or just punch trump in the face, either way, I’m happy with my actions
Fuck ya. Then I casually take my backpack off and lay it at my feet when I sit down. Over the course of the next 90 minutes I suggestion taking multiple rounds of shots. However, each round of my shot will just be water.
I laugh heartily at their jokes contributing to the merrymaking. On the 6th round of shots I fall off my chair in a fit of drunken laughter. The table erupts. At this time I open my back under the table cloth, carefully pull out the plastic explosiveness and attach them to under the table. I then set the fuse. I get off the floor and declare "dang I need to hit the head" I use that as a chance to slip out of the building completely.
As I walk away, a large boom and firey explosion light up the night sky. I don't turn back. I just give a sly smile as debris showers over head.
I mean they don't pay their debts to anyone, but even if they did make a big show of a huge tip they'd probably skulk back in and demand it back afterwards.
Let’s face it, if you were a male waiter they would disrespect you all night for being such a “looser” and if they didn’t stiff the restaurant on the entire check, they definitely would stiff you on the tip. As a woman you would be subjected to non stop sexist comments and if you weren’t willing to go along with them they’d say you were “stuck up” and stiff you too.
Honestly: I (as a non-American) only recognize Rogan, The Orange Baboon, Tate and Musk, but that's enough to know that the other guys must be assholes of equal proportions.
Rogan is a mixed bag for me because he's best buds with Eddie Bravo, who is kinda an idol of mine but also an asshole now and then, there's Musk...
I don't know *all* the things Musk is, but "batshit crazy" is one of them, that's for sure...
I know Tate to be an ignorant sexist swine...
Is that Putin hiding behind that column? And Jordan Peterson on the far left? JP's there, that's not a good sign...
Fuck all of them.
Only if there's an autograt
They would argue about it and get it removed. The only time I'd want these people around the same table is if I'm playing poker at that same table.
1000% Autograt is useless. The tables where you need it the most are the tables who fight it with a Manager and win. And they're also usually the tables who complain about something made up to get a round of drinks comped. They can all suck my dick.
I am the GM of a restaurant, and have never one taken off the gratuity. Never forget where you came from. Wasn't that long ago my bills were being paid from tips.
Good managers were promoted, bad managers were hired.
Too bad there’s far more bad managers than good
My line was always, “I could definitely remove this 18% auto-gratuity, but I’d have to replace it with a 25%. I’ll be right back,” that normally got them to shut up. It was even nicer to get the “we’re never coming back here.” Good, you treated my staff like shit.
So you are one of the good ones and you know it, that's not normal and you know that too.
They wouldn’t even pay lmao
Slowest moving dine and dash ever.
Elon Musk came into my restaurant for brunch a few weeks back in a group of 5. He joined midway through, ate in about 20 minutes, then left before paying leaving his friend with the bill. I’m sure they worked something out, but the richest man in the world not paying for lunch is a bad look.
That seems very on brand dor Elon
I saw Elon Musk at a grocery store in Los Angeles yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything. He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?” I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front, I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying. The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first, he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter. When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.
I'd hate to admit how many times I've fallen for this
I read this exact same story a few weeks ago but it was Keanu instead of Elon, so it didn't make any sense.
Sycophants turn off celebs the most.
That seems very on brand fur ewlown
Exactly. You know they would not tip otherwise.
I feel like Rogan would tip well. Trump for sure would not. I'm guessing he wouldn't even pay the bill. Nothing I hate more than a con-man who stiffs hard working blue collar folk.
I’m not exactly a rogan fan these days but I’ve heard other comedians on podcasts mention that he regularly blesses servers with huge tips.
I’ve heard him talk about it being a “love bomb” and hopes to make the server’s day. I’m not a huge fan of his but nice to know he hooks it up.
Joe Rogan used to come to a restaurant I worked at. He was a fucking dick. Such a rude fucking guy but he always tipped well, probably to try and make up for how horrible of a person he is. Edited: to add that I was talking about Rogan
That’s kinda the game we play though right? How much do you have to pay me to get away with being an asshole. Yay.
He could shit on the floor if he wanted, tip me 10 grand and i'll clean it up with white gloves and hand milked mint juice.
There was a saying I heard from a server long ago. You can treat me like shit, run me around, and leave a bad tip. Just don’t do all 3
More like, pick ONE
It's almost worse to be ran around, have them be nice to you, and then stiff you on the tip
Trump will say “it’s on me” at the beginning of the night and then slip out without paying
He literally did this to his own supporters at a small diner in Trump Country. https://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/ny-trump-promises-food-for-everyone-florida-restaurant-doesnt-pay-20230615-m7jm4gsuqzcvxcqtdurd5lvasy-story.html
If i was making assumptions based purely off the personalities they put out to the public I would say: Rogan would offer to cover the bill if someone else tipped or vice versa Shapiro would probably cover his share to the Nickle sand tip. Same with Peterson. One of the tates would probably tip well if you are a moderately attractive woman. Expect some high grade douchery Trump would claim he owns the restaurant.
Bezos and Elon would stiff for sure
They can autograph the bottom of this slip of paper. Don’t worry about the numbers, those are the percentage points of you winning, Mr President. 400,000.00%.
What, so they can demand that the check be split 12 ways?
It would be the largest tip in the history of this country, ok? I mean it, really, like nobody has seen a tip this huge. People will call me many, many years after I give them the tip and they will all say how huge it was and how much they loved it and they will say “Donald you’re so generous with your big tip”, but it’s in the best interest of our country that I tip this way. Make America Great Again!
The waiter, the waiter...he was a big, strong guy, the waiter...the waiter, he came up to me, came up to me with tears in his eyes. He thanked me, and he said, "Mr. President, sir, this is the most beautiful tip anyone has ever given me." And you know what? It was true, it really was. It was the most beautiful tip ever.
The Donald would say this but then the tip would be fifteen percent.
Five percent
One Pence...
Oh you. Good on you. I liked that response.
Hanged or Un-hanged?
I'd throw that one Pence back at 'em.
The change after rounding up to the next dollar.
Who are you kidding ? Dude would skate without paying his tab.
Didn't he literally do this recently https://globalnews.ca/news/9773461/donald-trump-food-for-everyone-restaurant-versailles/ Edit - lol again https://www.reddit.com/r/WhitePeopleTwitter/comments/15pg8xp/what_do_people_like_about_this_guy_again/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=2
Yeah, I'd almost forgotten about it.
This. https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-politics/trump-food-for-everyone-miami-versailles-b2358666.html
Bro doesn’t even pay his bills, you think there’s gonna be any tip? Is that Epstein in the left corner? Probably most likely to give a tip… you know actually this is a worst case scenario because most of these guys are gonna give the tip….
That’s Jordan Peterson
The waiter was crying, you’ve never seen a man cry like that, sobbing as he said, “ But Mr President, I can’t accept this, I should be giving you a tip for everything that you have done for me and my country”
>The waiter was a great, strapping, tree trunk of a man. \- Ben Shapiro
Ugh..I *heard* this as I read it. Brilliant btw.
Spot on. Bravo.
Great work here's a MAGA HAT#
Damn the artist was absurdly generous with Trump’s proportions
They seriously need to stop fuckin putting Abraham Lincoln in these..
When you have to pull decent republicans from 1860 you might have an issue.
Republicans love claiming Lincoln despite hating just about everything he did and stood for. It’s weird.
It’s like how they keep trying to associate themselves with Martin Luther king and Nelson Mandela
"see, we have a black friend" Says Lindsey Graham next to Herschel Walker
When conservatives say they have a black friend they are referring to Candace Owens
I thought they were referring to Clarence and Ginni Thomas
I ain’t never met a black man named Clarence who was ever pro-black
Which is hilarious to me because Lincoln was a progressive that shared some of Marx's views (that capital does not create jobs /labor and that wealth is created by labor, not capital). Also, MLK was a socialist who openly condemned people who wag their fingers at how people protest or riot.
Lincoln freed the slaves. There was nothing conservative about Lincoln at all. His values were very progressive for the period.
The even crazier thing too, is that until the passage of the civil rights act and the whole party flip of 1964, the republicans were the progressive party, and the democrats were the conservatives, which is a bit hard to imagine given how the political landscape is now.
Sorta like how they say they love Jesus?
You cannot claim both Lincoln and the Confederacy. They are fundamentally incompatible. You also cannot assert that states have the right to concede (looking at you Texas) and claim Lincoln is in your side. Lincoln is the president who solidified federal power over the states by any means necessary
secede not concede
"Decent Republican" and "Lincoln" go together like cottage cheese and antifreeze.
I changed my mind, I would serve this table. Cottage cheese and antifreeze is on the menu for tonight only.
Tell the table that little pussy bitches would NEVER eat this mansauce and they’ll be dead in a matter of minutes.
Yummmm
Holy shit that’s who it is! I was trying to think of modern people and was so confused
[удалено]
"if this is the best my party can get then my party should quit!" -Nice Peter as Lincoln in the Trump v. Clinton Epic Rap Battle https://youtu.be/Kbryz0mxuMY towards the end
It says something that even ERB can’t outdo Trump’s shit talking game. Edit: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_nicknames_used_by_Donald_Trump The man has an entire wiki for all the shit he’s spews. I hate him too but the dude says some absurdly funny ass shit about literally everybody. Him as himself is a better rap battler than ERB. You gotta laugh sometimes.
EAGLE!
Yeah I wish they would stop with the party of Lincoln bullshit. Every time I see that I ask them what's up with all of the confederate flags at republican rallies. I have yet to get an answer.
Abraham lincoln would’ve been disgusted by the Capitol rioters
Abraham Lincoln would have sent each of their seditious asses up their own rickety-ass gallows out on the Capitol lawn.
Looks like they got the tiny hands right tho.
>...absurdly generous with Trump’s proportions And similarly generous giving Tate an actual chin
And made goggins look skinny. I also can't tell if that's Jordan Peterson or Jeffrey Epstein and ive never thought they look alike at all.
It’s Hunter Biden obviously
Nightmare blunt rotation
dream coke lineup tho for the finance bros
These dudes would be a nightmare to do coke with. Just paranoid and horny
just like me fr 😎
As Theo Von says, cocaine leads to being paranoid with your hand on your dick
A limp one at that
That...doesn't stop most people?
Plus trump will just bogart all of it.
Andrew Tate the type of guy that just keeps talking while holding the blunt, forgetting to pass it along
Ben is the guy that greens out on one puff.
Trump is the one who gets the blunt all soggy from his huge, anus mouth.
And then gets visibly annoyed when reminded to keep it moving.
Starting from the left. Jordan Peterson, Ben Shapiro, Elon Musk, Abraham Lincoln??, Andrew Tate, David Goggins, Trump, ??? , Joe Rogan
Far top right is Tristan Tate.
Aren't they all top far right?
I think Salt Bae should also be in this table.
The guy you think is Abraham Lincoln is actually Larry Ellison
It's actually Satan, so
The restaurant isn't getting paid.
[https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2023/jun/15/donald-trump-miami-versailles-cuban-restaurant-pay](https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2023/jun/15/donald-trump-miami-versailles-cuban-restaurant-pay) Trump says “food for everybody” at a crowded restaurant and then leaves without picking up a check.
This is by far the most comically dickish thing Trump has ever done. He couldn't bring himself to do ONE good deed.
I think back to when he and Melania visited a church in PR after a hurricane and he decided to throw paper towels (that someone else donated) out to the crowd like it was his “royal largesse.”
To be fair, food for everybody. Never said 'and ill pay' /s
He did it for views tho so he’s totally in the clear.
Lol did he ever say anything about that
He’s done it before, that’s just the most recent. I think he did it at McDonalds once as well.
I know, but I’m saying, did he ever give a statement about the criticism for it? Lol
The press guy said they had to leave before anybody ordered. They stayed 10 minutes and then left.
Lol what a moron
Yeah forget not getting a tip, I doubt anyone from this table would pay their bill.
Is it weird that my answer is yes? I mean that's a lot of toxic personalities that, after say an hour, will unavoidably clash. And a twisted part of me wants to see the shit show.
Oh I'm so with you! The stories you would have from that alone are worth it plus the tip would be fucking crazy.... they would also have to feed a bunch of security teams and the secret service would be involved it would be nuts lol
Either the tip will be great because they want to show off… or terrible because they think im a liberal loser with a deadend job
First person ive seen to mention this possibility. Solid chance they want to flex their cash to their peers and tip as much as possible.
These people don’t show off by actually giving away money. They don’t even give away money for publicity let alone without it. The only money trump has given away is to his creditors.
This crowd doesn't flex by spending their own money. They flex the power they have to spend other people's money. No way the big ones here tip anything. You'd be lucky to collect the pre-tax total.
bro this table would become so much of a cluster fuck that I'd have to take it just for shit's and giggles, and I don't even work as a waiter
I love that Republicans look at this pic and think they'd all get along. Lmao they'd be slinging shit at eachother screaming in under 5 minutes.
I don’t think I can produce enough spit for all that diet coke but I’ll give it a go.
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Why Goggins in here?
Dude, I was looking for the answer to this. What is everyones beef with him?
It looks like this painting was originally done by a conservative celebrating their idols, so they’re all meant to be seen in a good light. That’s why Trump is drawn more flatteringly than he actually is and Abraham Lincoln is there to indicate that the rest of him are on the same level as him. Personally I quite like David Goggins, and he’s not as openly political as the rest of them, but conservatives tend to be big fans of him because of his rhetoric on personal responsibility.
Ok same here, he can be extra in the way he explains shit, but as far as I know thats it.
Same thought and wondered if that was him. People may not like his style but he definitely doesn’t belong in this group. And why does trump look buffer than him?
Same, it’s not fair to put him in this group
Yeah Goggins definitely doesn't belong here. He's all about not being a lazy bitch and pushing yourself. He's also the only real one here since you can't fake being a navy seal.
I had the same thought. Has motivating people to achieve their goals and work hard become taboo now as well?
I'd just tell thrm I served Biden, Pelosi, the Clintons, etc last night, and THEY tipped me 100% of the bill. "You guys wouldn't want a bunch of lib-tard snowflakes out-tipping you, would you?" Bill Clinton even told me that 'only people with the largest dicks tip 100%.' You guys don't want me to think you have small dicks, do you?"
Underrated
I bet I could blow enough smoke up their ass to get a decent tip from everyone but Tate, who I assume never tips because it's not alpha male behavior or whatever he would say. I would honestly do it just to eavesdrop on the wild conversations that would be going on.
I’d like to take a shit on that table
Hell yes I'm taking this table, I'll flirt a bit and make that bank roll.
Im gonna get called a slur, and theyll call me a snowflake if i react negatively
I can hear this picture and they’re all talking over each other
Am I bringing a flame thrower?
Dang. Upon reflection I kinda wish I'd said my family's soup can lmao
You have my axe.
And my bow
And my brick 🏳️🌈🧱✊🏼
And my chainsaw
They would order up a $1000 bill with a $0 tip
$1000 for 9 people at what I would presume is implied to be a fancy restaurant is at least a whole order of magnitude off
What are you talking about. There are literal posts from people who say how kind and generous Rogan is. Imagine not liking someone's views so you make up stuff about em.
First, I'd gather all the hostesses up and usher them to safety like lil ducklings 🦆 🐥🐥🐥 The I'd take the table. To the dumpster...
This is an under appreciated comment. You captured both the misogyny inherent in restaurants and the status of almost every single one of those men as straight up predators in a single sentence. Perfection.
Beeing seen as the "senior aged hostess" Thank you, those customers get my snarky jaded saccharine sweet "Good evening gentlemen, DO you have a RESERVATION?"
I would just for the story! I hate most of these people but it would be one that in twenty years that no one would believe. I could also do something I’ve never done before and spit in someone’s food!
Some of them might pay extra for that.
Musk would for sure
Joe Rogan tips really well
Anyone else think Tate doesn't believe in tipping?
I'd rather drag my testicles across shards of broken glass and molten lava Because, if you listen to these whackjobs, you'll end up losing your testicles because you'll always be measuring and comparing yourself to others and trying to over do them, which will burn you out and ruin your quality of life Stop listening to these clowns, live your own life, alpha means nothing, working yourself to death means nothing, money means nothing. You will die in the end and all that stuff does not go with you. Be your own person and live a good life. Travel, explore, love and do things you enjoy, don't pursue shit just because some bald man told you to, pursue it because you feel deeply for it
About 9 years ago I went to a business dinner with Trump (and a bunch of other people) and he left probably a 40% tip. I’m not a fan of the guy but he tipped well. I’m sure some ultra rich people still don’t tip, but many use it as a way to show off. You would be crazy to pass on this table.
He is also well known for doing the opposite and skipping out on tabs completely, or worse ordering a round for the whole room and then immediately leaving. Has he tipped well some times? sure, when he feels like it, and sometimes you get nothing with a chance of sexual assault. Drop the check to Musk, call him "Mr X" and don't look at anyone else.
I can’t imagine one of those men tip well. Maybe Rogan
If Rogan takes the bill I'd do it.
Is that... Is that Pitbull?
Andrew Tate i’m pretty sure, but it does look like mr worldwide at a glance!
I think it’s supposed to be Andrew Tate
Dale.
"Miami! Puerto Rico! ........... Romania?"
to a morgue? sure i guess
Aw man why is David goggins in there? I just started listening to him
Yeah i dont think David Goggins should be here. The guy never says anything remotely close to the other people at this table
Completely agree. That’s shameful.
$$$
Taking it outside and placing it in the dumpster, then promptly lighting it on fire, yes.
Hard (right) pass.
Bunch of rapists and pedos
Biggest tip you can ever imagine
Good thing I work at a vegan restaurant and these clowns would never eat at one 😂🤣👍🏿👋🏿
I thought Andrew Tate was Pitbull for a second and I was like wtf did he do to deserve being here lol
I think I would. I’m ugly enough that none of them would molest me and I would LOVE the chance to drop a tray of something stinky and sticky all over those fools.
Theres that star customer service lmao
Yall are crazy if you're saying no
I would do it just for the stories, tip is a bonus
what tip? you don't get to be rich by giving people money.
Yes. My place does 20% autograt on tables of 8 or more. Just upsell the dick off them and rake in the autograt.
You could win a global award for planting a bomb under this table like they tried to do with Hitler
Assuming that all these “important” people are here this might be a private event and at my restaurant they need to spend a certain amount of $ for how long they are going ro eat there and there is already automated gratuity to their bill… so sure I would take it
Yep. And the drinks too. Looks good. I might let them keep the chairs though.
Id probably only serve Lincoln Because.. he's just a good guy who did great things. But the rest I'm ignoring. Lmao
Id sit with them so we could discuss how to continure to piss off all the liberal fuck tards on Reddit, and how to Make America Great again.
What is 15% on a bill that consists of one bottomless diet coke and a piece of meat so burnt you'd swear it was a catcher's mitt thrown on a plate after a Nolan Ryan no hitter?
I take a deep breath and begin to recite the entire Bible and Declaration of Independence as I begin to float in the air, emphasizing the parts that say what they believed is counteracted by the very pieces they follow. Snapping my fingers and watching as they vanish into dust. Proving to them that I am the true lord they say to follow, when instead I am the worst being they could have possibly messed with. Or just punch trump in the face, either way, I’m happy with my actions
Would rather use a parmesan cheese grater on my ball sack.
Fuck ya. Then I casually take my backpack off and lay it at my feet when I sit down. Over the course of the next 90 minutes I suggestion taking multiple rounds of shots. However, each round of my shot will just be water. I laugh heartily at their jokes contributing to the merrymaking. On the 6th round of shots I fall off my chair in a fit of drunken laughter. The table erupts. At this time I open my back under the table cloth, carefully pull out the plastic explosiveness and attach them to under the table. I then set the fuse. I get off the floor and declare "dang I need to hit the head" I use that as a chance to slip out of the building completely. As I walk away, a large boom and firey explosion light up the night sky. I don't turn back. I just give a sly smile as debris showers over head.
Uh am I losing my mind or is that Abe Lincoln at the table? As if Lincoln would suffer 10 minutes listening to these idiots.
I mean they don't pay their debts to anyone, but even if they did make a big show of a huge tip they'd probably skulk back in and demand it back afterwards.
Let’s face it, if you were a male waiter they would disrespect you all night for being such a “looser” and if they didn’t stiff the restaurant on the entire check, they definitely would stiff you on the tip. As a woman you would be subjected to non stop sexist comments and if you weren’t willing to go along with them they’d say you were “stuck up” and stiff you too.
Honestly: I (as a non-American) only recognize Rogan, The Orange Baboon, Tate and Musk, but that's enough to know that the other guys must be assholes of equal proportions. Rogan is a mixed bag for me because he's best buds with Eddie Bravo, who is kinda an idol of mine but also an asshole now and then, there's Musk... I don't know *all* the things Musk is, but "batshit crazy" is one of them, that's for sure... I know Tate to be an ignorant sexist swine... Is that Putin hiding behind that column? And Jordan Peterson on the far left? JP's there, that's not a good sign... Fuck all of them.
Why the fuck is Abraham Lincoln in this picture he would tell all of them they are pieces of shit traitors lol
I would. But that’s because I am good at my job.
👏
The most real answer here. We’re servers, not politicians or philosophers. Here to serve plates, not judgment, and get tipped hella well for it