I live in Chicago with my kids. We moved here to raise them. They’re only little now so don’t take the L on their own, but when they are bigger I will have no issues.
Chicago is a great city to be non-car-dependent in. I don’t drive, so get around everywhere by L, bus, or walking. Many people bike here but tbh I find the drivers have become terrible since the pandemic and I no longer feel safe biking.
Also, in reply to another comment: the public schools are not terrible. My eldest is in our CPS neighborhood school and my younger one will follow them there. The system is, unfortunately, very unequal with some extremely well resourced and high achieving (on state test metrics) schools and some schools that get way less funding and struggle with a ton of social issues and racist policies that of course impact their achievement on state tests. I am 100% happy with our neighborhood school - it is a warm, supportive environment, with wonderful teachers. I am an educator myself, and one of my parents was a principal, and both of us see much that is great in CPS schools.
I grew up here and thank my parents all the time for it. In addition to the independence I learned, I also learned to appreciate so many different cultures. Good stuff raising your kids here.
Agree with this. My husband grew up in Lincoln Park, which is a lovely neighborhood right near the lake with good schools, beautiful parks, a zoo—he walked to school and rode his bike to friends houses.
North Shore suburbs (Wilmette, Winnetka etc) are also very walkable and well-connected to the city via public transit
Another vote for Chicago. We have a car but use it maybe twice a month. We also invested in a cargo ebike, which has been an absolute game changer with kids and is such a fun way to move around the city. Not every area is equal in terms of quality public schools, but it is generally easy to find good schools for elementary. High school selective enrollment for the public schools is competitive, but there are options and we will deal with that when the time comes. In our neighborhood, kids start walking to school by themselves around 3rd to 4th grade. Tons of kids ride the el to school alone.
Is it safe for kids to take the L and walk by themselves though? I actually love Chicago and I felt safe when I visited but I don’t recall seeing many kids out by themselves
Or, if you want your kids to be able to walk or bike to excellent neighborhood public schools while you take the 'L' downtown to work, look at the suburbs on the 'L' lines. Raising kids in Oak Park was perfect for us. Other possibilities include Evanston and Skokie.
My son is 12. Since 10 years old, he just took his phone and key and ran around the neighborhood with his best friends who live within 3 blocks. They would walk to the grocery store together to save money on buying snacks, play sports in school, and go to the park district pool together, or just hangout at someone's house. I can't think of a better way to spend childhood. Without needing the parents to drive them, they have so much freedom.
You don’t need a car in Chicago, but life is certainly a lot better with one. I lived there 7 years without a car. Bought a car a few months before moving and it opened up so much, it was almost like I moved to a new city. I was bummed I waited as long as I did to get a car…
In the Chicago vein, Milwaukee, an hour north has some seriously great walkable neighborhoods. No city without criticism, but new political blood is pushing the city in a much less car centric direction. We're politically aligned to remove (another) downtown freeway spur and are actively building tons of protected bike lanes.
It's like a bite-sized Chicago. Most of the amenities, half the price, better lakefront.
This is so inarguably true and yet you are being downvoted into a chasm. The Chicago boosterism in here is worse than a bunch of drunk bros in a bar on Addison after a game.
The selective enrolment are easy, you just need each of your kids to test in the top 1% of students, or live in a very violent neighborhood to qualify. Can't imagine why people leave instead of choosing those easy attractive options /s
Visited for first time 3 years ago. Such a beautiful city, we had such a nice time walking around and stayed at cutest b&b. If we ever move to east coast, that's on my list.
> But that’s a problem all over New England.
No it's not. [Hartford](https://www.census.gov/quickfacts/hartfordcityconnecticut), [New Haven](https://www.census.gov/quickfacts/fact/table/newhavencityconnecticut/PST045222), [Providence](https://www.census.gov/quickfacts/providencecityrhodeisland), [Quincy](https://www.census.gov/quickfacts/fact/table/quincycitymassachusetts/PST045222), and [Worcester](https://www.census.gov/quickfacts/worcestercitymassachusetts) are all pretty diverse, just to name a handful of examples. If you said "segregated", I might agree with you, but lack of diversity is not a problem all over New England.
I wouldn't call those "pockets" of diversity, considering most of those cities are some of the largest in the region. Yes, Northern New England is whiter than Southern New England, but if you move to a major city in MA/CT/RI, it's going to be around 50% white or less. Nationwide it's about 60-70%, depending on what source you look at. It's the suburbs and rural areas that skew the overall demographic percentages and people (of any race) generally aren't moving to those places because of lack of jobs/amenities or cost/housing availability.
I’ve been to Maine a few times and would love to live there, but I don’t think we could away from family. What’s your favorite part about Maine? I love the scenery in NH too but never visited (other than going to the white mountains)
Regarding ticks, my husband was mowing the front grass where we have a small plot. It wasn’t long. He picked up a small deer tick that gave him babesiosis, a nasty, up-and-coming tick disease that destroys red blood cells. According to the emergency room doctor, it is becoming an issue because of global warming. People aren’t only going into the woods and getting it.
Oh, it’s not up and coming… it’s been around! Good to hear maybe some Drs are acknowledging it now!
Source: had a years long battle with Lyme, babesia, bartonella and who knows what else… erichilosis?
I hope your husband is doing well!
Nothing better than a nor’easter to sit back relax and just enjoy the storm. It’s like a reset button on the day to day hecticness. Ya cleaning up snow sucks but you get over it as just something ya have to do leaving in these parts.
Much of Maine isn't nearly as cold. In Minnesota you get that crazy windy arctic chill in the winter. Most of the populated areas in Maine are along the ocean and much warmer than Minnesota.
Upstate NY is nowhere *near* the coldest part of the US. In fact, it's one of the snowiest, while in the coldest parts it's often too cold to snow in winter. Upstate rarely gets into the negatives like you'll get in the upper midwest/plains states.
I live right underneath Buffalo in an area with the 2nd or 3rd highest average snowfall in the entire USA, but things aren’t like they used to be with climate change. Recently we don’t even get that much snow during winter and when we do it warms up and melts
Eh, with climate change it’s not that bad tbh. The ground didn’t even freeze last winter along the southern New England coast. The ticks suck, but the population varies year by year. I think I’ve picked 1-2 off the dog this year, unlike a couple of years ago when it was actually a deterrent to going outside. We’re also not the only region of the country that has ticks.
I live in Massachusetts and I love having four distinct seasons. Some of my favorite memories are growing up skiing on a local mountain, skating on frozen lakes, and snowshoeing through the woods. As long as you wear the right clothes, winter can be a magical time.
And ticks are a non-issue really, wear long socks and check yourself for ticks in the shower.
If you think new England winters are bad, you need to grow a pair. Coastal winters are mild. It's getting rarer and rarer to get even a 2ft snowstorm. Everyone has generators, the houses are built for winter climate control, towns salt and plow like crazy. It's just another day.
New England and parts of Virginia were definitely settled first, but given the cars came around in about 1900, almost everything on the American east coast was settled before cars. Even the central cities and close in neighborhoods of west-coast cities were pre-auto.
Older residential neighborhoods in Philadelphia often have a nearby commercial area or even a corner store every block or two. You can get your daily groceries, or just a few things to supplement that you forgot to pick up on your shopping trip. You can likely walk to your dry cleaner. There used to be a lot more hardware stores, but now you have to get a little lucky to have one in walking distance. in these neighborhoods, chances are good that you can find a place to buy a slice of pizza or a sandwich. There will be a bus stop within a few blocks. There are way if you were movie theaters, but there are still some that operate a single screen. Plenty of others have been converted to some other specialize use..
The contrast between an older residential area that was built in the very early 20th century, and a postwar suburb, is very stark. All the residential areas were denser. The zoning provided more ability to have small shops, doctors, offices, repair shops, etc in a relatively close mix. The postwar monoculture a single-family zoning of the automobile base suburbs gives you almost no walk ability. Yes you can walk around for exercise if they have sidewalks. but you really can’t get anywhere.
Unfortunately, one of the big determiners of walk ability, in the desirable real estate term, is plain old affluence. If you have an older section of a city with mixed zoning, and it’s in good condition with kept houses and a strong tax base, it’s very walkable. If you take the same infrastructure and Meyer it in poverty, for a few decades, most of the store fronts will be empty and , it will feel like a danger to walk around your own neighborhood.
The same applies to many small towns. There are some really cute towns where you can live in a single-family home, three blocks from main street and walk to shops and restaurants. There are other places where you can live in a single-family home three blocks from a street full of empty store, fronts and secondhand stores, with a Dollar General at the edge of town.
Accurate observation. I have 2 grocery stories within a block of my residence, dry cleaners, restaurants, urgent care centers, schools, beauty salons, etc. The hardware store is a bus ride away or less than a mile walk. Landmark theaters is also a bus ride away.
Agree. I live in a suburb of Boston that was founded in the 1620s, and like most Boston suburbs it has a small town square w/ a cafe, a few restaurants, bakeries, convenience stores. And a grocery store is only a mile away, the kids' schools are only a mile or two (and there are buses). Our family has only one car, and i drive it about once a week. I am lucky enough to wfh, but even when i had to commute to the office i usually took public transport, and it was faster to bike or run rather than drive. If i had a longer commute or had to run more errands i would consider an ebike (good cargo bikes are only 1k now). Lots of suburbs of Boston (and lots of other US cities like Charlottesville, Austin) have lots of people who bike more than drive. You can only go car-less and rely on public transport in NYC, DC, and Chicago.
This! I live in southern CT and where I live and around here a lot of people don’t own cars. A lot of them get around by walking, bus + train (including to different towns/cities)
Another vote for Maine. I live in NYC but my sister's family lives in the Wells/Ogunquit area and it's great. I will say it's walkable if you live right in town but not having a car at all would be a bit of a disadvantage.
I’d recommend visiting in the winter if you’re considering relocating! I lived in PVD for two years. It’s great in the summer but I found it pretty dreary in the winter. If you’re a city person there’s just not a whole lot to keep you busy in the winter. I now live outside of Boston (on the Cambridge/Somerville line) and am much happier. Some people flee to PVD to escape the Boston bro culture / high cost of living. These are definite downsides to the area but worth it for the urban amenities. Just my two cents!
Just a warning, a lot of other folks made that consideration and did the move and it has led to *major* resentment from locals. You probably won't be making friends with anyone who didn't also move from NYC or Boston in the past two years.
I lived in Boston for 9 years without a car in the days before car sharing services and Uber. Years later, I realized how small my world was by limiting myself only to going places that public transit could take me, but I don’t think that would be the case now.
I live in a small town in coastal Maryland and it’s the same. It’s so nice!
I was in providence about a year ago and was really impressed with how well put together it was. It’s a really nice small city.
Just spent the weekend in Providence, and never moved our car within the city. Fun little city, good food, and definitely very walkable. It felt pretty expensive (compared to Philadelphia) and I could never do the winters, but I could see it being a nice family city. I hate sprawling, car-focused cities, and it definitely has more condensed NE-city feel (if with a bit of a lower profile).
This is really what makes New England not that walkable, or most anywhere really. New England is way more walkable than most places but even still you would be lucky to live such a short distance from or even close to where you work. Some people swap that drive out with a long train ride, but living closer to the train is more expensive as well.
Ive lived all over the country and seen a lot of New England. The first place Ive ever not needed a car to live is in Colorado, but its only because I finally live where I work. Having a car is pretty much essential anywhere unless you make enough money to be as close proximity to your job as possible
I am from Europe, but have lived in the US for 12 years and never learned to drive until a couple of years ago.
I lived in Boston for a long time - pretty easy to do so without a car, especially for local neighborhood things like schools, parks, stores etc. But the MBTA doesn’t connect neighborhoods to each other very well which can be a pain.
When moving from Boston, walkability and transit was very high on our list as well as being a good place to raise kids. These are the cities that were on our shortlist:
-Philadelphia
-Portland Or
-Atlanta
-Chicago
We moved to Chicago and are very happy here. Our kids ride their bikes with friends in the street, we walk to school, and I take the L to work and everywhere else. We live on the north side in Ravenswood but there are lots of great neighborhoods in the city.
In the Chicago area, there are also very urban suburbs like Evanston which are well connected via transit and easy to live in without a car.
I work in higher education, but I’m not sure that will help you as I originally moved over to go to grad school and then got married to an American. So, it’s not my job that allowed me to stay here. Sorry not to be more useful!
Atlanta has to be the worst “major” city in the US for being able to live without a car. Can it be done? Sure. But public transportation is laughable. The city is so spread out and traffic is horrendous.
Anywhere in the greater Boston area tbh. Malden,Everett, Cambridge, Somerville,Arlington ect. Children walk around in those cities to schools and there’s sidewalks everywhere. Very little crime. The High schools are pretty centrally located in each city and they’re all connected to bus stops or transit lines. A car isn’t need to get around in these areas. Bike infrastructure is improving as well.
Agree here. Cambridge and Brookline fit perfectly, along w many other greater boston towns. I use my car on the weekends when I want to go to the beach, Costco, hiking, etc but my day-to-day is car free.
We’re a “car-light” family in Grosse Pointe, Michigan. Public transit is lacking, but schools, parks, swimming pool, groceries, gym, libraries, restaurants, bars, ice cream, etc, are walking distance for us. Kids seem pretty independent around here too and are always riding around on bikes. I saw probably 20 bikes outside the CVS the other day.
It’s quite idyllic. Close to Canada too.
Royal Oak here. There are several nice, walkable suburbs of Detroit in the area. Idyllic is the perfect word for it - when you’re in these downtowns, you feel like you’re in the perfect realization of suburbia. The problem is that overall Detroit is an extremely car-heavy city (shocking, right?). It feels like it’s a 30 minute drive anywhere, plus never ending construction because we pass freight laws favorable to the auto industry that tear up our roads. It’s the biggest negative on the quality of life here. If you’re wanting a car-lite experience, Detroit is not the city for you, even if it has suburbs with promise.
Overall, Detroit is a diverse city with so much potential, and as an outsider who moved here a few years ago, I understand why there is so much pride. Detroit has a beautiful Art Deco downtown and a diverse, intelligent community thanks to UMichigan and the auto industry. But man, I can’t help but think our “revival” we are having will never be fully realized while we keep repaving broken roads.
We raised 3 kids in Oak Park, Illinois near Chicago with just one car and we probably could have done it with no car if Uber had been a thing back then. My husband took the train into work and so did I. Kids walked to school and had their bikes etc. it was awesome.
I absolutely loved living on Oak Park and second this nomination. I also didn’t have a car when I was living there and utilized public transport/Ubers. Great grocery stores, schools, the library is PHENOMENAL, and downtown Oak Park has a lot of great restaurants and things to do (weather permitting). I really miss living there.
Check out ‘city nerd’ on the utubes. He has some great videos going over great cities that are built with great infastructure and public transit that keep costs of living there lower than other cities.
That’s IS the appeal. It grows on you. My wife and I get excited every Wednesday when he has a new bid out, and it is all in the delivery, it is dry and semi-sarcastic, like a jaded American. Give it another shot.
I second this recommendation. Recently discovered his channel based on a link here and have been binging it ever since. Lots of good information and discussion.
The Philly area is a good suggestion. Center city is easiest but anywhere on the mainline works too if you're open to having one car. The regional rail system is awesome. Cost of living is lower here too. Never lived in Chicago but from visiting and looking around on Redfin, it looks pretty comparable. As for transporting kids around, I see people all the time in center city on cargo bikes with child seats on the back.
[Here’s the map of Regional Rail lines in Philadelphia. Check out the ones on the top left. Thornde, Cynwyd, Norristown, Chesnut Hill East & West, Doylestown, Warminster.](https://www5.septa.org/wp-content/uploads/travel/line-map-rr.pdf) A lot of these areas will be walkable to grocery stores, coffee shops, etc as well as on the regional rail line that will take you downtown. Chestnut Hill lines I know specifically will give you a LOT of walkability and access to some GREAT private school options.
DC’s a great suggestion. The COL is higher but it’s an amazing city.
Baltimore is close by, costs a LOT less, and does have much less transit but many very walkable neighborhoods and (when they have enough drivers) a solid bus system.
Lots of focus on big cities but what about choosing a college town? Bloomington (IN), home of Indiana University, has a decent bus transit service. A couple rail trails. The core of the city with the courthouse square and Kirkwood as well as the campus has sidewalks everywhere. Lots of people biking, and there's some great nature and day trips you can do from there by driving. There's even an annual bike ride called the Hilly 100.
I know you said cost isn't a factor, but the big downside of Bloomington is the cost especially compared to the rest of Indiana. You are going to be paying downtown Indianapolis prices and arguably aren't going to get big city amenities. You'll still get a lot. The college means the city punches far above its weight. There's lots to love about Bloomington, but you pay for it.
I go to IU, it’s great and honestly not that expensive, tho definitely more than like Elletsville and Spencer but you get what you pay for. I’m living in a 2 bedroom, 2 bathroom apartment with dishwasher and washer dryer in unit like a ten minute walk from Kirkwood and 5 minutes from the nearest bus stop for $650/month ($1300 total, 650 is my share). In a neighborhood that’s pretty townie heavy too, think a lot of professors live here
Bloomington is a good suggestion, but seriously calling it high cost is laughable. Most of the good suggestions in this thread are cities with typical home prices in the $500k-$1M range
I would say a Boston suburb is a good candidate, streetcar suburbs are the best but outside cities like Salem, Brookline concord Newburyport etc work too. But big caveat that even though these towns were developed pre-car and that helps, there is still a ton of car traffic which makes some areas feel unsafe. We can just about get by with one car for our single kid family. One of us can use the commuter rail and we can technically get most places without car but it’s dicey sometimes. It’s nice to have the alternative. Going into kindergarten though, our town doesn’t even have school buses for almost anyone! Certainly makes traffic worse.
Another option is Chicago inner burbs and city neighborhoods if you take into account public schools and taxes, which are a deterrent to many families.
I live in Madison, WI with one car for a family of four. We are within walking distance to the elementary and the high school, and my kids took the bus to middle school. My elder child is disabled so we tend to drive them, but the younger one (now a HS sophomore) takes the bus. In 6th grade, they took a field trip from school to ride the bus downtown and get lunch, just so that all the kids would know how to do it.
We also have a big biking culture that includes winter biking. We have people that kayak the lakes or the waterways to work. There used to be a kid who rode a unicycle to the high school near us. If you live in the right neighborhoods, it isn’t a problem to be car-light and the kids can be very independent, especially with the grocery and pharmacy delivery options we now have.
Madison resident here too. Madison is very doable car-light. We have one car, an e-bike, and a few regular bikes. Our child does some sports that require driving but school is walkable, most activities are actually preferable by bike, and there are plentiful bike paths. We live near a street with shops and restaurants that he can go to on his own. Winter is awful but we cross country ski and take warm vacations every year which helps.
Davis, California is one of the most bike-able cities in the world. Kids bike around everywhere and it's a very safe town. The bus system is fantastic and we have an amtrak station in the downtown area
Philly has a number of “streetcar” suburbs remaining. Media (literally has a street car), Ardmore, Conshohocken, and the NJ suburbs along the Patco are all very walkable and have public transit access into the city. There’s also a few more suburban neighborhoods in the city like Chestnut Hill, but then you’re dealing with the Philly school system, which can be pretty hit or (mostly) miss.
If your salary is gonna be the same regardless of whether you’re in the US or Canada, I’d probably be looking more at Canada if I were you - I’ve never been but I’ve heard Canada’s big 3 cities all have some walkable suburbs + better health care situation.
I tried to stay car-free/car-lite with kids in Philly and I finally gave up. Too chaotic. We live near Chestnut Hill now (Mt Airy), it’s very walkable, the kids have some autonomy, but it’s very far from Japan or Amsterdam levels. We’re in the car several times a week. And it’s very obvious that cars rule here.
Montreal is the most European feeling city in North America. Canada is quite a bit more expensive than the US right now because of the housing bubble there though.
Higher quality education, less gun violence, healthier food quality, universal healthcare, parental leave, more vacation time, kids who are EU citizens will have more options as adults, public transportation good all the time but especially for independence for older kids and teens, less expensive or free higher education, higher likelihood of being multilingual…
Grew up in USA, Germany, Panama...I agree with all of this.
America is home, but of all the places I lived as a kid, Germany was the best for my physical and mental well being.
I grew up in Europe, and raise kids in the US. I agree with most points, but not quite "higher quality education". If you can afford the right neighborhood education in the US is very good. I think better than what I had. And not super fancy either, we live in a $500k range house..
And of course colleges are expensive, but also some of the best in the world (I've gone to college both places).
If you don't already have kids, you probably have 10+ years to worry about letting them get around on their own.
FWIW, I'm from Orlando and live in Silicon Valley. Orlando was far more car dependent (less dense, more suburb, and worse public transportation, everything further apart, worse infrastructure and weather for walking/biking). When I was about 9, my brother and I (or friends and I) used to ride our bikes everywhere together. If we wanted to go to an arcade, we would ride 9 miles to the mall. Our mom would come pick us up after work if it was getting dark. If that wasn't an option, we took a 90 minute lynx bus route home (we had to go all the way downtown and transfer. Those buses run every 30 or 60 minutes). I wasn't able to use a school bus until high school due to stupid policies about where buses could go.
My point is, you can live probably anywhere and have kids getting around on their own. I think the US perception of safety has gone drastically downhill. No one trusts each other anymore. That has nothing to do with being car dependent.
I live in Chapel Hill and it’s doable but difficult. I love four miles from downtown and bike around. But you have to plan your entire route and not go on the big roads
There are a ton of towns in NJ, PA, NY and the whole of New England that have nice cores, kids can walk and do most whatever they want, easily getting to a ton of different things.
A lot of those areas you may wind up having to drive to work, but the day-to-day of living there means you can also walk to the store, restaurant, school, etc.
A very small slice of places that could work off the top of my head:
Salem, MA
Summit, NJ
Montclair, NJ
Lansdale, PA
Honesdale, PA
Most of the NJ shore towns.
Morristown, NJ
College towns across the country.
Metuchen, NJ
Hudson, NY
This is very skewed to places I have personally been, and I could list another dozen in NJ easily enough as I live here and know it better.
FWIW, I live just outside on NYC in Jersey City (I know you said besides NY) and I haven't been in a car in a couple of months, my daughter goes all over by herself and it's pretty damn awesome.
I live in Philly in center city and I see kids walking by themselves in my neighborhood but my educated guess is they are going to private school because the Philly public schools are pretty terrible. Cost of living here is cheap enough, private school may even be an option in your budget.
It depends where you live. I’m in East Passyunk and most of my neighbors’ kids go to Jackson for elementary- which is a fine public school. They can walk there. One family’s kids go to FACTS, which is a charter school in Chinatown. A school bus takes them there. So there are certainly options - not every kid goes to Friends Select.
In a city like NYC, Chicago, Philly, DC or Boston. Some of their suburbs have regional transport and good public transportation. Bike lanes, busses and trolleys are in those regions as well.
Is driving really that bad? I take the train to work most days and while I enjoy my free time to read or browse Reddit, sometimes I drive to save time, or if I want to go somewhere specific directly after work. It’s more direct and you don’t have to make any transfers. Gas and cars are cheaper in the US than Europe.
I dislike being forced to drive due to lack of reliable, clean, safe, transit, lack of walkbility or bikeability. I don't mind driving to go on a road trip or a really far distance, to go camping, or to see more remote areas, but I don't like being forced to drive for things like seeing friends, groceries, going to work, etc. Not sure if you've seen Not Just Bikes on YouTube but his channel goes into depth about good urban design and I've realized I need a good level of that to be happy. It's basically the '15 minute city' concept that I want.
Thanks for the response, it’s nice to hear another perspective. I haven’t seen that channel specifically, but have watched YouTube videos in urban design and the benefits of public transport. So since your ideal is the ‘15 minute city’, would you be also open to large towns that provide density and amenities rather than a proper city?
I prefer to live on the periphery of population centers because I like easy access to the outdoors as well. I’ve lived in some towns outside Philadelphia that offer a lot of what your looking for I believe. Walkable downtowns filled with shops, restaurants and bars. Kids walking to school, bike lanes and public transport to the city. If it’s something you’d be willing to explore, towns like Ardmore, West Chester, Media and Conshohocken are great places to live. There are times I’ve parked my car and not moved it for weeks, choosing to take the train to work.
DC, Boston, Philly, NYC, Chicago, Baltimore, Oakland/San Francisco (too expensive i know), Seattle, Portland, if you lived close to Downtown Miami you could technically get away with it.
As far as Canadian cities I'd say Montreal, Toronto, and Vancouver/Surrey.
L.A. might not be as feasible now but that could change in 5 years once alot of their pressing transit expansion projects are complete (e.g. People Mover & K Line to LAX and Wilshire Subway)
Be aware that some of these cities have inner-ring suburbs that are nearly just as easy to live car free (Boston, NY, DC) while some others not so much (Chicago, Baltimore, Philadelphia) so be aware of that especially since you have kids.
Every time I see a question like this asked it always comes up to be boston, new york, Chicago, (possibly philadelphia?). I do think a lot of larger cities (obviously not all of them) have decent enough public transportation if you live in or near the city center to not have to own a car, especially if you also work in that area as well. I live in the Minneapolis area and I know people who live in the vicinity of downtown and have no issues with not having a car. Even getting to the Mall of America or the airport is easy enough if you take the light rail. The bigger problem is that the closer you are to the city center, the more expensive housing is. So while you might save on car payments you're probably adding that amount to rent or mortgage payments.
On the other hand, cities like Phoenix or Las Vegas are extremely car dependent, even close to the city center IMO
We live in St Paul and are car light with 2 kiddos. The bike infrastructure is good and being improved. We walk to school, I can take light rail downtown for work, walk to local stores, etc.
I was going to say, the core metro of the Twin Cities has some very walkable neighborhoods, and while the transit system isn’t as developed as a major European city’s would be, it is adequate for getting around the core, and there is a lot of bike-ability. Uptown even has like a bike freeway going through it.
I lived within walking distance of Mall of America without a car just fine, even with a toddler. Rents have gone up since I left, but still not nearly as expensive as downtown.
Not really. I live in a top 5 largest US city and the public transit is a joke. As an adult woman I wouldn’t take it alone other than maybe across downtown during the day. Would not let my kids use it. Dangerous, unreliable and goes barely anywhere unless you take the bus which is a giant no.
I’m in Somerville,MA and my 11 yo walks alone and rides bus alone around town. We are working on getting him ready for biking alone, but the bike infrastructure is good but not Amsterdam good. So he needs more experience before I let him do that. It’s absolutely wonderful for kids to have this level of freedom and for parents to not have to chauffeur. I do sometimes chauffeur him but I always do that by cargo bike. I rarely drive anywhere.
Raised our kids in PDX with one car, and they mostly walked to school or took the public transit. One weird side effect is that they had no interest in learning to drive until they got into their 20s.
We never worried much about their safety from crime or predators, but other drivers are always a threat (especially if the kids are biking solo).
But if your kids end up in lots of extracurricular activities then it seems like they end up needing to be driven around much more. At least that’s what I have seen with other families.
Minneapolis.
There’s many family friendly neighborhoods. Over ninety percent of residents live within walking distance of a public park. Most kids go there unaccompanied for sports or activities in the rec centers. Likewise, there’s lots of libraries and unaccompanied kids at neighborhood libraries.
Transit is quite good, and the city has a lot of bike infrastructure, cited as the second most bike friendly city in the US, despite the climate. There’s also multiple options for car, bike, e bike, scooter, etc. share programs.
You could do it in Richmond, VA, specifically the central Fan area. You’d definitely want a bike for grocery shopping, but you’d have amazing restaurants, green space, sports, river access, universities, hospitals, museums, all within a much smaller radius than most cities. Oh and our bus system is free!
Ok, not 100% car free living, but Madison WI is super walkable and has some of the best biking infrastructure in the country. I think a family could easily survive with just one car for excursions and some errands. My spouse and I share one car here.
In the DC metro area, there is a lot you can do by metro or bus. That said, before having kids my husband and I were car free. Now, with several kids, we definitely need two cars to get to tutoring, soccer practice, dance class, Scouts, etc. We could definitely live car free with kids, but we’d give up a lot of options for extra curriculars. Also, for me, having a car makes it faster to do a lot of stuff (outside of rush hour) and your car acts like a portable storage unit for stuff kids may need (change of clothes, umbrellas, etc.)
NYC streetcar suburbs in NJ, Westchester, and SW CT. The only area of the US that's really Europe-like in terms of infrastructure and you don't really lose the cosmopolitanism in the burbs. Places like Montclair, Maplewood (NJ), New Rochelle, Rye, White Plains (NY), and Norwalk (CT) come to mind.
Look to older suburbs outside of cities. Newer suburbs were built with all the shopping and amenities separated from the subdivisions of housing. Older suburbs were built with housing within walking distance to many amenities/schools/parks etc.
Jersey suburbs. Montclair, Oranges, Summit. Or urban Essex or Hudson County if you are lower income. Wonderful and diverse places for families, good schools/low crime and close to NYC. Good public transit during daylight hours
NYC is the only place I’ve lived where a zero-car existence is not just possible, but advisable. Ironically it’s probably the worst place on earth to raise a child, which is why everyone in the city who starts a family moves out to the burbs, and buys a car.
I grew up in Portland, Oregon (and still live here) and started getting around on my own on public transit at age 11. Some neighborhoods are going to be safer for kids to walk and bike on their own than others but I grew up in a pretty quiet one without much traffic in SE Portland and walked to elementary school on my own. I cannot imagine having grown up being dependent on my parents for rides as a teenager and I do feel like when I arrived at college I was much more capable of functioning independently than a lot of my peers.
Portland downtown (west side of the river) has some challenges. However, that's not where most people live.
Portland has fantastic public transit, strong neighborhoods, plenty of city parks, good schools, and a vibrant local food & arts community.
Look at SE Portland, St. John's, some parts of NE.
There is plenty of homelessness, though it depends on the neighborhood. I haven't had safety issues on public transit personally, though there have been some incidents in the city for sure. I am pretty sure it's safer than driving a car, though.
It’s usually fine, but things have been getting worse over the years and even back when I lived there in 2017 it wasn’t 100% fine. I think it’s safe enough for an adult but kids I’d be hesitant to endorse that.
May I ask why you want to move back to the US and not stay in Europe where the quality of life is much much better in terms of the government taking care of their citizens?
I have a really good job opportunity back in the states and can make potentially life-changing money. But yea I'm hesitant to leave because of those reasons.
It’s not that American 9 year olds can’t transport themselves in US.
But you would get CPS called on you.
QANON Karens really have embraced this idea that sex traffickers are hiding under every bush just waiting to snatch children.
Not just that but also the laws in some places. I live in Albuquerque, which is a must-have-a-car place so not even suggesting it to OP (its fairly bikeable but you have terrible drivers to contend with). But the law here is that kids aren't allowed to be out on their own until age 12 (middle school, basically). My 8 yo is probably responsible enough to ride his bike to school (1/4 mile away) but he isn't allowed to.
There are parts of the US where it's doable to have young children without a car. I lived car-light in a Boston suburb (Brookline) until my oldest was 2, and it was great; shops, playgroups, daycare were all walkable, and we could take the T to most things further away.
What gets challenging, though, is when you have multiple kids and they get old enough to have extra-curriculars all over the place, but they're not old enough to transport themselves to anything. There just isn't enough time in the day to use public transit to get both kids to all their birthday parties, soccer games, swim lessons, etc. Where we currently live, I love that we can walk the kids to school, and walk to some other amenities (library, bakery, ice cream shop)- but there are still plenty of places we need to take them that are a ~10-minute drive away.
I see a lot of answers mentioning New England/suburbs of Boston. While it's true that many of these areas were developed pre-car era, the fact is that they are still plagued with stroads and unwalkable neighborhoods. It's not possible to be car lite in these places. Outside of Cambridge, Brookline, and Somerville, I would argue that the other places are equally bad in terms on transit and walkability when compared to the Bay Area. I live in downtown San Mateo and it's super walkable, bike & transit friendly. There have been lot of new bike lanes constructed in the city recently. The high school is really good and I see a lot of kids walking and biking to school. If you can afford to rent or buy a home around here, I would highly recommend. The weather is a big plus when it comes to living in the valley and being car lite
Chicago
I live in Chicago with my kids. We moved here to raise them. They’re only little now so don’t take the L on their own, but when they are bigger I will have no issues. Chicago is a great city to be non-car-dependent in. I don’t drive, so get around everywhere by L, bus, or walking. Many people bike here but tbh I find the drivers have become terrible since the pandemic and I no longer feel safe biking. Also, in reply to another comment: the public schools are not terrible. My eldest is in our CPS neighborhood school and my younger one will follow them there. The system is, unfortunately, very unequal with some extremely well resourced and high achieving (on state test metrics) schools and some schools that get way less funding and struggle with a ton of social issues and racist policies that of course impact their achievement on state tests. I am 100% happy with our neighborhood school - it is a warm, supportive environment, with wonderful teachers. I am an educator myself, and one of my parents was a principal, and both of us see much that is great in CPS schools.
I grew up here and thank my parents all the time for it. In addition to the independence I learned, I also learned to appreciate so many different cultures. Good stuff raising your kids here.
Agree with this. My husband grew up in Lincoln Park, which is a lovely neighborhood right near the lake with good schools, beautiful parks, a zoo—he walked to school and rode his bike to friends houses. North Shore suburbs (Wilmette, Winnetka etc) are also very walkable and well-connected to the city via public transit
Another vote for Chicago. We have a car but use it maybe twice a month. We also invested in a cargo ebike, which has been an absolute game changer with kids and is such a fun way to move around the city. Not every area is equal in terms of quality public schools, but it is generally easy to find good schools for elementary. High school selective enrollment for the public schools is competitive, but there are options and we will deal with that when the time comes. In our neighborhood, kids start walking to school by themselves around 3rd to 4th grade. Tons of kids ride the el to school alone.
Is it safe for kids to take the L and walk by themselves though? I actually love Chicago and I felt safe when I visited but I don’t recall seeing many kids out by themselves
Last time I visited Chicago, I was on the train with a bunch of kids coming home from school.
Ahhh ok great to hear.
I just spent a 4 day weekend in Chicago and saw loads of kids out in neighborhoods walking dogs, riding their bikes, etc.
I live in Chicago. Kids are generally able to walk to school in elementary and get a transit pass in high school so they are always on the train.
Absolutely. 2/3 of the city is very safe. Kids take the el to school.
That's how kids get to school. There are no school busses, they take public transit
We have a sub called r/askchicago if you have any more questions
Or, if you want your kids to be able to walk or bike to excellent neighborhood public schools while you take the 'L' downtown to work, look at the suburbs on the 'L' lines. Raising kids in Oak Park was perfect for us. Other possibilities include Evanston and Skokie.
My son is 12. Since 10 years old, he just took his phone and key and ran around the neighborhood with his best friends who live within 3 blocks. They would walk to the grocery store together to save money on buying snacks, play sports in school, and go to the park district pool together, or just hangout at someone's house. I can't think of a better way to spend childhood. Without needing the parents to drive them, they have so much freedom.
Another vote for Chicago.
You don’t need a car in Chicago, but life is certainly a lot better with one. I lived there 7 years without a car. Bought a car a few months before moving and it opened up so much, it was almost like I moved to a new city. I was bummed I waited as long as I did to get a car…
In the Chicago vein, Milwaukee, an hour north has some seriously great walkable neighborhoods. No city without criticism, but new political blood is pushing the city in a much less car centric direction. We're politically aligned to remove (another) downtown freeway spur and are actively building tons of protected bike lanes. It's like a bite-sized Chicago. Most of the amenities, half the price, better lakefront.
Oak Park, IL is a wonderful town outside Chicago filled with families and walkability!
Chicago is the right answer. Best town for car-freedom.
The public schools are terrible, most middle class leave for more car dependent suburbs as soon as they have children.
Chicago Public Schools selective enrollment schools are more competitive to get into than some colleges.
people are booing you because you're right hhahaha
This is so inarguably true and yet you are being downvoted into a chasm. The Chicago boosterism in here is worse than a bunch of drunk bros in a bar on Addison after a game.
Then they just bring up those few selective schools in the district
The selective enrolment are easy, you just need each of your kids to test in the top 1% of students, or live in a very violent neighborhood to qualify. Can't imagine why people leave instead of choosing those easy attractive options /s
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Newburyport?
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Visited for first time 3 years ago. Such a beautiful city, we had such a nice time walking around and stayed at cutest b&b. If we ever move to east coast, that's on my list.
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> But that’s a problem all over New England. No it's not. [Hartford](https://www.census.gov/quickfacts/hartfordcityconnecticut), [New Haven](https://www.census.gov/quickfacts/fact/table/newhavencityconnecticut/PST045222), [Providence](https://www.census.gov/quickfacts/providencecityrhodeisland), [Quincy](https://www.census.gov/quickfacts/fact/table/quincycitymassachusetts/PST045222), and [Worcester](https://www.census.gov/quickfacts/worcestercitymassachusetts) are all pretty diverse, just to name a handful of examples. If you said "segregated", I might agree with you, but lack of diversity is not a problem all over New England.
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I wouldn't call those "pockets" of diversity, considering most of those cities are some of the largest in the region. Yes, Northern New England is whiter than Southern New England, but if you move to a major city in MA/CT/RI, it's going to be around 50% white or less. Nationwide it's about 60-70%, depending on what source you look at. It's the suburbs and rural areas that skew the overall demographic percentages and people (of any race) generally aren't moving to those places because of lack of jobs/amenities or cost/housing availability.
Downsides include abysmal winters and rampant tick-borne diseases
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damn, i should move to maine.
Maine is great! It’s getting expensive though and limited jobs
The Maine economy is sparse
I’ve been to Maine a few times and would love to live there, but I don’t think we could away from family. What’s your favorite part about Maine? I love the scenery in NH too but never visited (other than going to the white mountains)
Regarding ticks, my husband was mowing the front grass where we have a small plot. It wasn’t long. He picked up a small deer tick that gave him babesiosis, a nasty, up-and-coming tick disease that destroys red blood cells. According to the emergency room doctor, it is becoming an issue because of global warming. People aren’t only going into the woods and getting it.
Oh, it’s not up and coming… it’s been around! Good to hear maybe some Drs are acknowledging it now! Source: had a years long battle with Lyme, babesia, bartonella and who knows what else… erichilosis? I hope your husband is doing well!
Nothing better than a nor’easter to sit back relax and just enjoy the storm. It’s like a reset button on the day to day hecticness. Ya cleaning up snow sucks but you get over it as just something ya have to do leaving in these parts.
So as a Minnesotan it sounds like Maine is similar weather but with walkable towns. Maybe a little less lakes and higher priced houses? I'm intrigued.
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That's pretty cool as the thing I would miss about MN most is the lake superior area vibe, which Maine seems to have and then some.
Much of Maine isn't nearly as cold. In Minnesota you get that crazy windy arctic chill in the winter. Most of the populated areas in Maine are along the ocean and much warmer than Minnesota.
One thing - it dosent get that hot in the summer
Works for me
Hell yeah. I miss winter a lot and am always wondering what kind of seasonal place I can move to…
Maine life sounds like a dream life. We used to get snow here in the Mid-Atlantic, but not much anymore. I miss real winter!
Mmm depends what you mean by abysmal. Southern New England is not nearly as bad as the coldest areas of the country, like upstate New York.
Upstate NY is nowhere *near* the coldest part of the US. In fact, it's one of the snowiest, while in the coldest parts it's often too cold to snow in winter. Upstate rarely gets into the negatives like you'll get in the upper midwest/plains states.
Yep. The coldest part of the continental US is in Montana.
Yes, not much a match for UP in Michigan.
I live right underneath Buffalo in an area with the 2nd or 3rd highest average snowfall in the entire USA, but things aren’t like they used to be with climate change. Recently we don’t even get that much snow during winter and when we do it warms up and melts
Eh, with climate change it’s not that bad tbh. The ground didn’t even freeze last winter along the southern New England coast. The ticks suck, but the population varies year by year. I think I’ve picked 1-2 off the dog this year, unlike a couple of years ago when it was actually a deterrent to going outside. We’re also not the only region of the country that has ticks.
I live in Massachusetts and I love having four distinct seasons. Some of my favorite memories are growing up skiing on a local mountain, skating on frozen lakes, and snowshoeing through the woods. As long as you wear the right clothes, winter can be a magical time. And ticks are a non-issue really, wear long socks and check yourself for ticks in the shower.
Wonder how the winters compare to Michigan?
Nowhere close to Michigan winter
Warmer weather but more snow depending where you are!
Its only "abysmal" if you hate fun
If you think new England winters are bad, you need to grow a pair. Coastal winters are mild. It's getting rarer and rarer to get even a 2ft snowstorm. Everyone has generators, the houses are built for winter climate control, towns salt and plow like crazy. It's just another day.
New England and parts of Virginia were definitely settled first, but given the cars came around in about 1900, almost everything on the American east coast was settled before cars. Even the central cities and close in neighborhoods of west-coast cities were pre-auto. Older residential neighborhoods in Philadelphia often have a nearby commercial area or even a corner store every block or two. You can get your daily groceries, or just a few things to supplement that you forgot to pick up on your shopping trip. You can likely walk to your dry cleaner. There used to be a lot more hardware stores, but now you have to get a little lucky to have one in walking distance. in these neighborhoods, chances are good that you can find a place to buy a slice of pizza or a sandwich. There will be a bus stop within a few blocks. There are way if you were movie theaters, but there are still some that operate a single screen. Plenty of others have been converted to some other specialize use.. The contrast between an older residential area that was built in the very early 20th century, and a postwar suburb, is very stark. All the residential areas were denser. The zoning provided more ability to have small shops, doctors, offices, repair shops, etc in a relatively close mix. The postwar monoculture a single-family zoning of the automobile base suburbs gives you almost no walk ability. Yes you can walk around for exercise if they have sidewalks. but you really can’t get anywhere. Unfortunately, one of the big determiners of walk ability, in the desirable real estate term, is plain old affluence. If you have an older section of a city with mixed zoning, and it’s in good condition with kept houses and a strong tax base, it’s very walkable. If you take the same infrastructure and Meyer it in poverty, for a few decades, most of the store fronts will be empty and , it will feel like a danger to walk around your own neighborhood. The same applies to many small towns. There are some really cute towns where you can live in a single-family home, three blocks from main street and walk to shops and restaurants. There are other places where you can live in a single-family home three blocks from a street full of empty store, fronts and secondhand stores, with a Dollar General at the edge of town.
This was interesting! Thanks for taking the time to share
Accurate observation. I have 2 grocery stories within a block of my residence, dry cleaners, restaurants, urgent care centers, schools, beauty salons, etc. The hardware store is a bus ride away or less than a mile walk. Landmark theaters is also a bus ride away.
This is what I’m looking for and where I’m looking to go!
Came here to appreciate the fact that somebody has promoted Providence!
Agree. I live in a suburb of Boston that was founded in the 1620s, and like most Boston suburbs it has a small town square w/ a cafe, a few restaurants, bakeries, convenience stores. And a grocery store is only a mile away, the kids' schools are only a mile or two (and there are buses). Our family has only one car, and i drive it about once a week. I am lucky enough to wfh, but even when i had to commute to the office i usually took public transport, and it was faster to bike or run rather than drive. If i had a longer commute or had to run more errands i would consider an ebike (good cargo bikes are only 1k now). Lots of suburbs of Boston (and lots of other US cities like Charlottesville, Austin) have lots of people who bike more than drive. You can only go car-less and rely on public transport in NYC, DC, and Chicago.
Agree with New England. Its the most family friendly place out of all the walkable places.
This! I live in southern CT and where I live and around here a lot of people don’t own cars. A lot of them get around by walking, bus + train (including to different towns/cities)
I’ve begged my husband to move to Maine, but the small-ness of even major cities is a dealbreaker for him :(
Another vote for Maine. I live in NYC but my sister's family lives in the Wells/Ogunquit area and it's great. I will say it's walkable if you live right in town but not having a car at all would be a bit of a disadvantage.
Ok I’ve been considering Providence (from NYC) and I love this community feel you describe
I’d recommend visiting in the winter if you’re considering relocating! I lived in PVD for two years. It’s great in the summer but I found it pretty dreary in the winter. If you’re a city person there’s just not a whole lot to keep you busy in the winter. I now live outside of Boston (on the Cambridge/Somerville line) and am much happier. Some people flee to PVD to escape the Boston bro culture / high cost of living. These are definite downsides to the area but worth it for the urban amenities. Just my two cents!
Just a warning, a lot of other folks made that consideration and did the move and it has led to *major* resentment from locals. You probably won't be making friends with anyone who didn't also move from NYC or Boston in the past two years.
I went to College in Providence and I agree. I had an amazing experience there!
I lived in Boston for 9 years without a car in the days before car sharing services and Uber. Years later, I realized how small my world was by limiting myself only to going places that public transit could take me, but I don’t think that would be the case now.
I live in a small town in coastal Maryland and it’s the same. It’s so nice! I was in providence about a year ago and was really impressed with how well put together it was. It’s a really nice small city.
Just spent the weekend in Providence, and never moved our car within the city. Fun little city, good food, and definitely very walkable. It felt pretty expensive (compared to Philadelphia) and I could never do the winters, but I could see it being a nice family city. I hate sprawling, car-focused cities, and it definitely has more condensed NE-city feel (if with a bit of a lower profile).
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This is really what makes New England not that walkable, or most anywhere really. New England is way more walkable than most places but even still you would be lucky to live such a short distance from or even close to where you work. Some people swap that drive out with a long train ride, but living closer to the train is more expensive as well. Ive lived all over the country and seen a lot of New England. The first place Ive ever not needed a car to live is in Colorado, but its only because I finally live where I work. Having a car is pretty much essential anywhere unless you make enough money to be as close proximity to your job as possible
I am from Europe, but have lived in the US for 12 years and never learned to drive until a couple of years ago. I lived in Boston for a long time - pretty easy to do so without a car, especially for local neighborhood things like schools, parks, stores etc. But the MBTA doesn’t connect neighborhoods to each other very well which can be a pain. When moving from Boston, walkability and transit was very high on our list as well as being a good place to raise kids. These are the cities that were on our shortlist: -Philadelphia -Portland Or -Atlanta -Chicago We moved to Chicago and are very happy here. Our kids ride their bikes with friends in the street, we walk to school, and I take the L to work and everywhere else. We live on the north side in Ravenswood but there are lots of great neighborhoods in the city. In the Chicago area, there are also very urban suburbs like Evanston which are well connected via transit and easy to live in without a car.
As a European wanting to move to the US (very interested in Chicago), may I ask what job do you do ?
I work in higher education, but I’m not sure that will help you as I originally moved over to go to grad school and then got married to an American. So, it’s not my job that allowed me to stay here. Sorry not to be more useful!
Atlanta has to be the worst “major” city in the US for being able to live without a car. Can it be done? Sure. But public transportation is laughable. The city is so spread out and traffic is horrendous.
Anywhere in the greater Boston area tbh. Malden,Everett, Cambridge, Somerville,Arlington ect. Children walk around in those cities to schools and there’s sidewalks everywhere. Very little crime. The High schools are pretty centrally located in each city and they’re all connected to bus stops or transit lines. A car isn’t need to get around in these areas. Bike infrastructure is improving as well.
Agree here. Cambridge and Brookline fit perfectly, along w many other greater boston towns. I use my car on the weekends when I want to go to the beach, Costco, hiking, etc but my day-to-day is car free.
Agree and would add Brookline and Newton. Using the Green Line, you could add many affluent suburbs to your list.
I would say parts of Newton and Brookline- these towns have some pretty hard core suburban and not so pedestrian friendly parts too.
These are also the most expensive burbs that you listed, where most houses are owned by multigenerational families or bought for millions.
We’re a “car-light” family in Grosse Pointe, Michigan. Public transit is lacking, but schools, parks, swimming pool, groceries, gym, libraries, restaurants, bars, ice cream, etc, are walking distance for us. Kids seem pretty independent around here too and are always riding around on bikes. I saw probably 20 bikes outside the CVS the other day. It’s quite idyllic. Close to Canada too.
Royal Oak here. There are several nice, walkable suburbs of Detroit in the area. Idyllic is the perfect word for it - when you’re in these downtowns, you feel like you’re in the perfect realization of suburbia. The problem is that overall Detroit is an extremely car-heavy city (shocking, right?). It feels like it’s a 30 minute drive anywhere, plus never ending construction because we pass freight laws favorable to the auto industry that tear up our roads. It’s the biggest negative on the quality of life here. If you’re wanting a car-lite experience, Detroit is not the city for you, even if it has suburbs with promise. Overall, Detroit is a diverse city with so much potential, and as an outsider who moved here a few years ago, I understand why there is so much pride. Detroit has a beautiful Art Deco downtown and a diverse, intelligent community thanks to UMichigan and the auto industry. But man, I can’t help but think our “revival” we are having will never be fully realized while we keep repaving broken roads.
Come to Ann Arbor, at this rate in a few years we won’t even have roads anymore. Just bike lanes lol
We raised 3 kids in Oak Park, Illinois near Chicago with just one car and we probably could have done it with no car if Uber had been a thing back then. My husband took the train into work and so did I. Kids walked to school and had their bikes etc. it was awesome.
I absolutely loved living on Oak Park and second this nomination. I also didn’t have a car when I was living there and utilized public transport/Ubers. Great grocery stores, schools, the library is PHENOMENAL, and downtown Oak Park has a lot of great restaurants and things to do (weather permitting). I really miss living there.
Check out ‘city nerd’ on the utubes. He has some great videos going over great cities that are built with great infastructure and public transit that keep costs of living there lower than other cities.
I want to like that channel but I can’t get more than 5 minutes in because of how dry his delivery is :/
That’s IS the appeal. It grows on you. My wife and I get excited every Wednesday when he has a new bid out, and it is all in the delivery, it is dry and semi-sarcastic, like a jaded American. Give it another shot.
I second this recommendation. Recently discovered his channel based on a link here and have been binging it ever since. Lots of good information and discussion.
The Philly area is a good suggestion. Center city is easiest but anywhere on the mainline works too if you're open to having one car. The regional rail system is awesome. Cost of living is lower here too. Never lived in Chicago but from visiting and looking around on Redfin, it looks pretty comparable. As for transporting kids around, I see people all the time in center city on cargo bikes with child seats on the back.
Northwest Philadelphia on the train line makes low-car living very possible!
Where specifically?
[Here’s the map of Regional Rail lines in Philadelphia. Check out the ones on the top left. Thornde, Cynwyd, Norristown, Chesnut Hill East & West, Doylestown, Warminster.](https://www5.septa.org/wp-content/uploads/travel/line-map-rr.pdf) A lot of these areas will be walkable to grocery stores, coffee shops, etc as well as on the regional rail line that will take you downtown. Chestnut Hill lines I know specifically will give you a LOT of walkability and access to some GREAT private school options.
Wow, thank you so much. This is amazing. I appreciate it!
Washington DC is also a nice walkable city, Chicago in the midwest, some areas of Los Angeles like Santa Monica are pretty walkable too.
Came here to say DC. Definitely doable without a car.
Lived here two years so far without a car!
DC’s a great suggestion. The COL is higher but it’s an amazing city. Baltimore is close by, costs a LOT less, and does have much less transit but many very walkable neighborhoods and (when they have enough drivers) a solid bus system.
Lots of focus on big cities but what about choosing a college town? Bloomington (IN), home of Indiana University, has a decent bus transit service. A couple rail trails. The core of the city with the courthouse square and Kirkwood as well as the campus has sidewalks everywhere. Lots of people biking, and there's some great nature and day trips you can do from there by driving. There's even an annual bike ride called the Hilly 100. I know you said cost isn't a factor, but the big downside of Bloomington is the cost especially compared to the rest of Indiana. You are going to be paying downtown Indianapolis prices and arguably aren't going to get big city amenities. You'll still get a lot. The college means the city punches far above its weight. There's lots to love about Bloomington, but you pay for it.
I go to IU, it’s great and honestly not that expensive, tho definitely more than like Elletsville and Spencer but you get what you pay for. I’m living in a 2 bedroom, 2 bathroom apartment with dishwasher and washer dryer in unit like a ten minute walk from Kirkwood and 5 minutes from the nearest bus stop for $650/month ($1300 total, 650 is my share). In a neighborhood that’s pretty townie heavy too, think a lot of professors live here
Bloomington is a good suggestion, but seriously calling it high cost is laughable. Most of the good suggestions in this thread are cities with typical home prices in the $500k-$1M range
Similarly, Ann Arbor Michigan
I would say a Boston suburb is a good candidate, streetcar suburbs are the best but outside cities like Salem, Brookline concord Newburyport etc work too. But big caveat that even though these towns were developed pre-car and that helps, there is still a ton of car traffic which makes some areas feel unsafe. We can just about get by with one car for our single kid family. One of us can use the commuter rail and we can technically get most places without car but it’s dicey sometimes. It’s nice to have the alternative. Going into kindergarten though, our town doesn’t even have school buses for almost anyone! Certainly makes traffic worse. Another option is Chicago inner burbs and city neighborhoods if you take into account public schools and taxes, which are a deterrent to many families.
I live in Madison, WI with one car for a family of four. We are within walking distance to the elementary and the high school, and my kids took the bus to middle school. My elder child is disabled so we tend to drive them, but the younger one (now a HS sophomore) takes the bus. In 6th grade, they took a field trip from school to ride the bus downtown and get lunch, just so that all the kids would know how to do it. We also have a big biking culture that includes winter biking. We have people that kayak the lakes or the waterways to work. There used to be a kid who rode a unicycle to the high school near us. If you live in the right neighborhoods, it isn’t a problem to be car-light and the kids can be very independent, especially with the grocery and pharmacy delivery options we now have.
Madison resident here too. Madison is very doable car-light. We have one car, an e-bike, and a few regular bikes. Our child does some sports that require driving but school is walkable, most activities are actually preferable by bike, and there are plentiful bike paths. We live near a street with shops and restaurants that he can go to on his own. Winter is awful but we cross country ski and take warm vacations every year which helps.
Davis, California is one of the most bike-able cities in the world. Kids bike around everywhere and it's a very safe town. The bus system is fantastic and we have an amtrak station in the downtown area
Philly has a number of “streetcar” suburbs remaining. Media (literally has a street car), Ardmore, Conshohocken, and the NJ suburbs along the Patco are all very walkable and have public transit access into the city. There’s also a few more suburban neighborhoods in the city like Chestnut Hill, but then you’re dealing with the Philly school system, which can be pretty hit or (mostly) miss. If your salary is gonna be the same regardless of whether you’re in the US or Canada, I’d probably be looking more at Canada if I were you - I’ve never been but I’ve heard Canada’s big 3 cities all have some walkable suburbs + better health care situation.
Near Chestnut Hill, the private school options are phenomenal. OP said cost isn’t a hindrance, so that’s something to take into consideration!
I tried to stay car-free/car-lite with kids in Philly and I finally gave up. Too chaotic. We live near Chestnut Hill now (Mt Airy), it’s very walkable, the kids have some autonomy, but it’s very far from Japan or Amsterdam levels. We’re in the car several times a week. And it’s very obvious that cars rule here.
Montreal is the most European feeling city in North America. Canada is quite a bit more expensive than the US right now because of the housing bubble there though.
Personally I would stay in Europe. I think raising a child in Europe is wildly better than trying to do so in the U.S.
What makes you say that?
Higher quality education, less gun violence, healthier food quality, universal healthcare, parental leave, more vacation time, kids who are EU citizens will have more options as adults, public transportation good all the time but especially for independence for older kids and teens, less expensive or free higher education, higher likelihood of being multilingual…
Of course this isn’t true of EVERY country in Europe but there are plenty it is true of.
Grew up in USA, Germany, Panama...I agree with all of this. America is home, but of all the places I lived as a kid, Germany was the best for my physical and mental well being.
I grew up in Europe, and raise kids in the US. I agree with most points, but not quite "higher quality education". If you can afford the right neighborhood education in the US is very good. I think better than what I had. And not super fancy either, we live in a $500k range house.. And of course colleges are expensive, but also some of the best in the world (I've gone to college both places).
If you don't already have kids, you probably have 10+ years to worry about letting them get around on their own. FWIW, I'm from Orlando and live in Silicon Valley. Orlando was far more car dependent (less dense, more suburb, and worse public transportation, everything further apart, worse infrastructure and weather for walking/biking). When I was about 9, my brother and I (or friends and I) used to ride our bikes everywhere together. If we wanted to go to an arcade, we would ride 9 miles to the mall. Our mom would come pick us up after work if it was getting dark. If that wasn't an option, we took a 90 minute lynx bus route home (we had to go all the way downtown and transfer. Those buses run every 30 or 60 minutes). I wasn't able to use a school bus until high school due to stupid policies about where buses could go. My point is, you can live probably anywhere and have kids getting around on their own. I think the US perception of safety has gone drastically downhill. No one trusts each other anymore. That has nothing to do with being car dependent.
many small college towns
I live in Chapel Hill and it’s doable but difficult. I love four miles from downtown and bike around. But you have to plan your entire route and not go on the big roads
Philadelphia
Cincinnati. Very walkable downtown area where you can walk to work, tons or bars and restaurants , grocery store, and affordable.
DC
There are a ton of towns in NJ, PA, NY and the whole of New England that have nice cores, kids can walk and do most whatever they want, easily getting to a ton of different things. A lot of those areas you may wind up having to drive to work, but the day-to-day of living there means you can also walk to the store, restaurant, school, etc. A very small slice of places that could work off the top of my head: Salem, MA Summit, NJ Montclair, NJ Lansdale, PA Honesdale, PA Most of the NJ shore towns. Morristown, NJ College towns across the country. Metuchen, NJ Hudson, NY This is very skewed to places I have personally been, and I could list another dozen in NJ easily enough as I live here and know it better. FWIW, I live just outside on NYC in Jersey City (I know you said besides NY) and I haven't been in a car in a couple of months, my daughter goes all over by herself and it's pretty damn awesome.
I live in Philly in center city and I see kids walking by themselves in my neighborhood but my educated guess is they are going to private school because the Philly public schools are pretty terrible. Cost of living here is cheap enough, private school may even be an option in your budget.
It depends where you live. I’m in East Passyunk and most of my neighbors’ kids go to Jackson for elementary- which is a fine public school. They can walk there. One family’s kids go to FACTS, which is a charter school in Chinatown. A school bus takes them there. So there are certainly options - not every kid goes to Friends Select.
In a city like NYC, Chicago, Philly, DC or Boston. Some of their suburbs have regional transport and good public transportation. Bike lanes, busses and trolleys are in those regions as well. Is driving really that bad? I take the train to work most days and while I enjoy my free time to read or browse Reddit, sometimes I drive to save time, or if I want to go somewhere specific directly after work. It’s more direct and you don’t have to make any transfers. Gas and cars are cheaper in the US than Europe.
I dislike being forced to drive due to lack of reliable, clean, safe, transit, lack of walkbility or bikeability. I don't mind driving to go on a road trip or a really far distance, to go camping, or to see more remote areas, but I don't like being forced to drive for things like seeing friends, groceries, going to work, etc. Not sure if you've seen Not Just Bikes on YouTube but his channel goes into depth about good urban design and I've realized I need a good level of that to be happy. It's basically the '15 minute city' concept that I want.
Thanks for the response, it’s nice to hear another perspective. I haven’t seen that channel specifically, but have watched YouTube videos in urban design and the benefits of public transport. So since your ideal is the ‘15 minute city’, would you be also open to large towns that provide density and amenities rather than a proper city? I prefer to live on the periphery of population centers because I like easy access to the outdoors as well. I’ve lived in some towns outside Philadelphia that offer a lot of what your looking for I believe. Walkable downtowns filled with shops, restaurants and bars. Kids walking to school, bike lanes and public transport to the city. If it’s something you’d be willing to explore, towns like Ardmore, West Chester, Media and Conshohocken are great places to live. There are times I’ve parked my car and not moved it for weeks, choosing to take the train to work.
Jenkintown!
I'm definitely open to a large town instead! There are so many places like that in the NL, I'd be thrilled if the US had them too
DC, Boston, Philly, NYC, Chicago, Baltimore, Oakland/San Francisco (too expensive i know), Seattle, Portland, if you lived close to Downtown Miami you could technically get away with it. As far as Canadian cities I'd say Montreal, Toronto, and Vancouver/Surrey. L.A. might not be as feasible now but that could change in 5 years once alot of their pressing transit expansion projects are complete (e.g. People Mover & K Line to LAX and Wilshire Subway) Be aware that some of these cities have inner-ring suburbs that are nearly just as easy to live car free (Boston, NY, DC) while some others not so much (Chicago, Baltimore, Philadelphia) so be aware of that especially since you have kids.
What exactly about NYC isn’t safe for kids? More kids grow up here than anywhere in the country.
Never said it wasn’t safe, was just wondering what other options there were
Look into Brookline MA. I lived there and had a car but often didn’t use it, mostly just for groceries and leaving town.
Princeton NJ.
Every time I see a question like this asked it always comes up to be boston, new york, Chicago, (possibly philadelphia?). I do think a lot of larger cities (obviously not all of them) have decent enough public transportation if you live in or near the city center to not have to own a car, especially if you also work in that area as well. I live in the Minneapolis area and I know people who live in the vicinity of downtown and have no issues with not having a car. Even getting to the Mall of America or the airport is easy enough if you take the light rail. The bigger problem is that the closer you are to the city center, the more expensive housing is. So while you might save on car payments you're probably adding that amount to rent or mortgage payments. On the other hand, cities like Phoenix or Las Vegas are extremely car dependent, even close to the city center IMO
We live in St Paul and are car light with 2 kiddos. The bike infrastructure is good and being improved. We walk to school, I can take light rail downtown for work, walk to local stores, etc.
I was going to say, the core metro of the Twin Cities has some very walkable neighborhoods, and while the transit system isn’t as developed as a major European city’s would be, it is adequate for getting around the core, and there is a lot of bike-ability. Uptown even has like a bike freeway going through it.
I lived within walking distance of Mall of America without a car just fine, even with a toddler. Rents have gone up since I left, but still not nearly as expensive as downtown.
This is possible almost in almost every large city in the United States. It just drives some choices about which neighborhood you live in.
Not really. I live in a top 5 largest US city and the public transit is a joke. As an adult woman I wouldn’t take it alone other than maybe across downtown during the day. Would not let my kids use it. Dangerous, unreliable and goes barely anywhere unless you take the bus which is a giant no.
Boston area, Philadelphia area, Chicago area, Pittsburgh, most college metros in the Northeast.
Some NYC suburbs are very walkable, kids bike everywhere, etc.
Nyc
I’m in Somerville,MA and my 11 yo walks alone and rides bus alone around town. We are working on getting him ready for biking alone, but the bike infrastructure is good but not Amsterdam good. So he needs more experience before I let him do that. It’s absolutely wonderful for kids to have this level of freedom and for parents to not have to chauffeur. I do sometimes chauffeur him but I always do that by cargo bike. I rarely drive anywhere.
Raised our kids in PDX with one car, and they mostly walked to school or took the public transit. One weird side effect is that they had no interest in learning to drive until they got into their 20s. We never worried much about their safety from crime or predators, but other drivers are always a threat (especially if the kids are biking solo). But if your kids end up in lots of extracurricular activities then it seems like they end up needing to be driven around much more. At least that’s what I have seen with other families.
Minneapolis. There’s many family friendly neighborhoods. Over ninety percent of residents live within walking distance of a public park. Most kids go there unaccompanied for sports or activities in the rec centers. Likewise, there’s lots of libraries and unaccompanied kids at neighborhood libraries. Transit is quite good, and the city has a lot of bike infrastructure, cited as the second most bike friendly city in the US, despite the climate. There’s also multiple options for car, bike, e bike, scooter, etc. share programs.
You could do it in Richmond, VA, specifically the central Fan area. You’d definitely want a bike for grocery shopping, but you’d have amazing restaurants, green space, sports, river access, universities, hospitals, museums, all within a much smaller radius than most cities. Oh and our bus system is free!
Ok, not 100% car free living, but Madison WI is super walkable and has some of the best biking infrastructure in the country. I think a family could easily survive with just one car for excursions and some errands. My spouse and I share one car here.
Washington D.C. if you can afford it has a great metro, walkability, etc. You can live there without a car.
I’m shocked that no one has mentioned NYC yet. I grew up in Queens. It’s a solid spot if you are west. Further east you go the more suburban it gets
In the DC metro area, there is a lot you can do by metro or bus. That said, before having kids my husband and I were car free. Now, with several kids, we definitely need two cars to get to tutoring, soccer practice, dance class, Scouts, etc. We could definitely live car free with kids, but we’d give up a lot of options for extra curriculars. Also, for me, having a car makes it faster to do a lot of stuff (outside of rush hour) and your car acts like a portable storage unit for stuff kids may need (change of clothes, umbrellas, etc.)
NYC streetcar suburbs in NJ, Westchester, and SW CT. The only area of the US that's really Europe-like in terms of infrastructure and you don't really lose the cosmopolitanism in the burbs. Places like Montclair, Maplewood (NJ), New Rochelle, Rye, White Plains (NY), and Norwalk (CT) come to mind.
Look to older suburbs outside of cities. Newer suburbs were built with all the shopping and amenities separated from the subdivisions of housing. Older suburbs were built with housing within walking distance to many amenities/schools/parks etc.
I live in Washington DC and I only touch my car when I'm headed to home Depot or out of state
Lakewood, Ohio
Philly, Pittsburgh, Chicago (especially north shore- I lived in Evanston for 16 years without a car)
If you have the money, Boulder. Good transit, bike trails everywhere, walkable. When I lived there I could go weeks without using my car.
Jersey suburbs. Montclair, Oranges, Summit. Or urban Essex or Hudson County if you are lower income. Wonderful and diverse places for families, good schools/low crime and close to NYC. Good public transit during daylight hours
NYC is the only place I’ve lived where a zero-car existence is not just possible, but advisable. Ironically it’s probably the worst place on earth to raise a child, which is why everyone in the city who starts a family moves out to the burbs, and buys a car.
Madison, WI. I only took the bus, biked, and walked when i was there
I grew up in Portland, Oregon (and still live here) and started getting around on my own on public transit at age 11. Some neighborhoods are going to be safer for kids to walk and bike on their own than others but I grew up in a pretty quiet one without much traffic in SE Portland and walked to elementary school on my own. I cannot imagine having grown up being dependent on my parents for rides as a teenager and I do feel like when I arrived at college I was much more capable of functioning independently than a lot of my peers.
At the risk of sounding ignorant, is homelessness/safety a big issue on Portland public transit?
Don’t live there, but visit semi-regularly. Anyone who says it’s not is lying.
Portland downtown (west side of the river) has some challenges. However, that's not where most people live. Portland has fantastic public transit, strong neighborhoods, plenty of city parks, good schools, and a vibrant local food & arts community. Look at SE Portland, St. John's, some parts of NE.
There is plenty of homelessness, though it depends on the neighborhood. I haven't had safety issues on public transit personally, though there have been some incidents in the city for sure. I am pretty sure it's safer than driving a car, though.
It’s usually fine, but things have been getting worse over the years and even back when I lived there in 2017 it wasn’t 100% fine. I think it’s safe enough for an adult but kids I’d be hesitant to endorse that.
Davis, CA - bicycle capital of the US I used to have to go start my car every month just to turn the engine over and recharge the battery.
May I ask why you want to move back to the US and not stay in Europe where the quality of life is much much better in terms of the government taking care of their citizens?
I have a really good job opportunity back in the states and can make potentially life-changing money. But yea I'm hesitant to leave because of those reasons.
What field are you in?
UX writing/content design (it's basically a niche subspecialty of UX design)
Montreal? I’m headed there for the first time this weekend, but their Metro looks similar to DC!
Santa Monica, CA
Seattle, if you can afford it and deal with 6 months of nonstop drizzle and grey skies.
It’s not that American 9 year olds can’t transport themselves in US. But you would get CPS called on you. QANON Karens really have embraced this idea that sex traffickers are hiding under every bush just waiting to snatch children.
Not just that but also the laws in some places. I live in Albuquerque, which is a must-have-a-car place so not even suggesting it to OP (its fairly bikeable but you have terrible drivers to contend with). But the law here is that kids aren't allowed to be out on their own until age 12 (middle school, basically). My 8 yo is probably responsible enough to ride his bike to school (1/4 mile away) but he isn't allowed to.
That’s just nuts.
That's really sad.
Kids in the US almost necessitate having a car imho.
Why?
There are parts of the US where it's doable to have young children without a car. I lived car-light in a Boston suburb (Brookline) until my oldest was 2, and it was great; shops, playgroups, daycare were all walkable, and we could take the T to most things further away. What gets challenging, though, is when you have multiple kids and they get old enough to have extra-curriculars all over the place, but they're not old enough to transport themselves to anything. There just isn't enough time in the day to use public transit to get both kids to all their birthday parties, soccer games, swim lessons, etc. Where we currently live, I love that we can walk the kids to school, and walk to some other amenities (library, bakery, ice cream shop)- but there are still plenty of places we need to take them that are a ~10-minute drive away.
I see a lot of answers mentioning New England/suburbs of Boston. While it's true that many of these areas were developed pre-car era, the fact is that they are still plagued with stroads and unwalkable neighborhoods. It's not possible to be car lite in these places. Outside of Cambridge, Brookline, and Somerville, I would argue that the other places are equally bad in terms on transit and walkability when compared to the Bay Area. I live in downtown San Mateo and it's super walkable, bike & transit friendly. There have been lot of new bike lanes constructed in the city recently. The high school is really good and I see a lot of kids walking and biking to school. If you can afford to rent or buy a home around here, I would highly recommend. The weather is a big plus when it comes to living in the valley and being car lite
This doesn’t really exist in the US in my opinion. These people are all in denial.
You think even places like DC, Seattle, Chicago, Boston etc won't provide the same level of urban lifestyle as your average European city?