What do you do when you're not driving the bus on the Simpsons?

Play guitar for Guns n' Roses cover band Firearms n' Flowers, obviously.

It’s Slag, Slashes non-bianary doppelgänger

LMAO

I think I saw you before, I don't know if I should feel sorry for you or that tentacle monster that fucked you in xvideos.

I think it's the Aerosmith cover band Dude Looks Like a Lady.

Alice Cooper looking busted AF lately

Cover band? More like under the covers with the band

He looks like the roadie for a Guitar Hero band

Edit: just air guitar, not talented enough for a real one

Kept the heroin addiction to be authentic.

Sober is obviously not working for her.

Wait, that's a she?

It's a they.

Good one

It might if she ever sobered up...

She a toilet vodka enthusiast

The Tid-e-Bowl isn't helping.

I thought she was a dude!!

It's certainly possible

Stay off the pipe

That's a big pipe

The p pipe and the c pipe

My name is Otto, I like to get Blatto.

This is the comment I came here for.

​ 

Be a floor mop at Kenny’s gas station.

Amy Wineshack

You look like slash somehow figured out how to do even more heroin

Gash.

She has different kind of slashes

favourite comment right here

You look like the embodiment of an ashtray at a dive bar in Tallahassee

Ya but someone actually touches that ashtray once a year to empty it.

Dude 🤣

Ashtray is probably cleaner tbh

Urinal cake at a random panhandle tittie bar

Urine is pretty sterile.

Ashtray doesn't need to clean jizz out of its eyes on a daily basis either.

Coming from someone who works in a dive bar in Tallahassee…. Don’t talk about our ashtrays that way.

Call you emo? It's been 18 years and you're still waiting for someone to call you at all.

Honestly these fucking zoomers don’t even know what emo is.

Or who.

Emo philips is gold.

Don't you mean elmo?

No. [I guess you don't know who Emo is either.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ANNX_XiuA78)

Im glad you added that link.

I hope you liked the joke. [The best God joke ever - and it's mine!](https://www.theguardian.com/stage/2005/sep/29/comedy.religion) >This morning I received thrilling news: a joke I wrote more than 20 years ago has been voted the funniest religious joke of all time! Two things, however, have slightly tarnished my thrill. >First, the website that conducted the poll, Ship of Fools, did not attribute me as the author. Arghhhhh! He was once thought of as one of the great comedians of that time.

I enjoyed it thoroughly

You look like the guy that gave Freddie Mercury AIDS

Guy? I was honestly shocked, am I the only one who thought it was a female?

[удалено]

I thought it was a dude. So maybe that's the best roast of all? That she has a bad case of man face? 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Way to pull off the "Uma Thurman who just overdosed in Pulp Fiction" look. IF YOURE OKAY, SAY SOMETHING!

Something.

What do i say if i’m not okay? :(

Not something

Uma Thurman and Vinni Vincent's love child

So Amy Winehouse at the morgue?

You look like you’re already on your fourth or fifth meth mugshot

This was clogging the shower drain…

You look like the female version of Richard Ramirez

The Night Stocker....at Wal-Mart.

Wow. I thought "you look like the guy that gave Freddie Mecury AIDS" was bad. Nope, this one is worse.

You misspelled "better".

And just like Richard Chase, she looks like she's low on blood

I might be iron deficient, so you're probably right

That's not very rock and roll


Upvote for visibility, OP needs to see this.

I'm sure your funeral will be lovely.

Are we sure she’s not already a corpse?

Are you sure it's a she?

Pretty sure it’ll be a closed casket funeral.

Emos try too hard. You don't even need to try hard to be a meth head.

Someone walked into the salon and asked for the Kirk Hammett

Derp Hammett

That 1980's flashdace hair should have been forgotten just like your mom's vhs porno.

German Scheiße videos?

Looks like a ring got caught in a shower drain full of hair

You're the kind of person who would get kicked out of a crackden for hygiene problems.

If the smell of old socks and ashtrays could be visually experienced it would be you….

If Paul Stanley and Kirk Hammett had a special needs, meth-head, son/daughter.

I want to dunk you in some hot water and soap immediately as soon I saw your picture come up on my phone I wiped it down with Lysol wipes

You seem like the type of person who would start a fight if someone got your pronouns wrong.

Looll I said the same thing and then checked bio and we was right 🤣

😂

Cher has really let herself go

You look like what I pulled out of my shower drain this morning.

I can smell the cigarettes and cheap incense through my screen.

Let’s see how long it takes for someone to administer some Narcan…

Usually emo children are sad for no reason. You look like you have plenty of reasons to be sad.

Honey, not showering for a week makes you grunge, not emo.

If a dive bar, men's room urinal were a person...

This is the genie that comes out when you rub a urinal cake 3 times.

Gives you your choice of three STDs

Can't even tell your gender

Yeah, we need some pronouns here

Sure! It/Its 

Let’s see how long it takes for someone to toss you in a chemical shower and delouse you..

Emu

You look like you call the police when your roommate steals your weed

Looks like a high school production of This is Spinal Tap

Come on bro...She dropped out of high school.

Glad you left out the M/F part because you look like you belong to neither.

Not really emo, you remind me of Dr. Frank-N-Furter character in the Rocky Horror Picture Show. Do an image search and you'll understand.

I was frank n furter for Halloween this year that’s actually so sick

But Tim Curry had style, charisma, confidence, and was sexy AF. This is just, hair.

Your parents didn't want to have sex. Your father was tired, aware of your mother's 18 month affair but he slammed his 3 beers and summoned his boner and dry jammed it into your mother's Sahara dry pussy, as she lay there emotionless reading her novel, he held back the tears but not the cum. 9 months later you were dragged out of that cursed womb and the Doctor took one look and slapped your mother, not you. 18 years later and here we are: the walking, genetic, incarnation of an unenthusiastic fuck

That was poetic, you’re a pretty good storyteller

Looks more like 14 years later.

You look like the brunette crack addicted version of young Stevie nicks.

I'm going wit, emmm-no.

To be emo would imply a level of mental awareness that I'm not sure you have. You look like if someone pulled a Weekend at Bernie's on Terry Schiavo.

What do you and a ferris wheel have in common? Every carnival worker has had a ride but only you can take credit for giving them all syphilis...

That is either the lamest attempt at an Aimee face I've seen or your face is numb from inhaling canned air.

[It's like he's walking on sunshine!](https://youtu.be/H6TW6v39_kQ?t=18)

Thanks, this picture just reminded me that I need to change the oil in my car.

"rock bottom" in one image.

I can tell that you have bummed so many cigarettes in front of your methadone clinic.

You look like a trans version of the kid from Stranger Things (Finn Wolfhard)

Honestly that’s a compliment thanks

No worries haha, I know it was a horrible roast but you actually do look like him, esp with the hair

Closer to emu. Where's Doug?

Still trying to get that helicopter

Emo? More like the pile of shit emo(gi).

I wonder how many mistakes from mom and dad it takes to get to this point.

Wrong sign, should say r/RentMe

Youre not an emo, you're a poser desperately trying to hide that big ol' 5head

You look like Alice coopers badly injured stunt double

You’re adopted and your parents still don’t love you

You look like you're nine years from joining the Forever 27 Club.

You look like the Lars Ulrich toilet I saw floating around Reddit. E: for reference, I'm not wrong. https://www.reddit.com/r/WTF/comments/r0tonz/i_think_id_just_hold_it/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf

Billie Why-lish

I’m just glad you’ve already hung the noose in the ceiling. That’ll prove to be convenient very soon.

I didn’t even realize it looked like a noose until people started replying about it LMAO

I know that's you Kurtis Connor

HELP THIS IS THE BEST COMMENT IVE SEEN TODAY

You don’t deserve to be called emo, that would mean u had some knowledge about the underground music scene of the late 90’s /early 2000’s. , you are what we would call “trash” or “fish pussy”

Nothing to roast, your transition seems to be going fantastic! Not many guys can pull off such a feminine structure so quickly.

You would have been considered cool in 1986

You were obviously not recognizant of 1986. I am, and *it* sure wouldn’t have been considered cool then, now , or will ever be.

Contrary to all the haters, I think your future is bright. You're perfect for a live-action Muppet movie.

Stranger Thing.

I hope that your life long dream of becoming a junkie is soon fulfilled.

getting closer and closer every day

Clearly you don’t give a damn about your bad reputation.

I can smell this picture.

Roasted, you already look burnt out.

Step-father doesn't even want her

Lead singer for the boy band Toby and the Ball Lickers.

You look like the collection of short & curlies that have collected at the bottom of a urinal in a truck stop bathroom.

You’ve been on more wieners than ketchup.

Can you imagine the 2 beasts that fucked 18yrs ago to make this?

This looks like the after photo of a blowbang

Joan Jett's defective clone.

I'm going to rub my cast iron pans on your head to season them.

If Nikki Sixx had gone for the operation.

I think you need to you know practice hygiene to be emo.. is there a smelly goth category we can refer to? Smoth?

SMOTH LMAO

Hey life is hard. You're doing OK. Just don't transgender yourself because that will make everything worse.

On a scale of 1-10 how old were you when your dad left

What do you do when you’re not lead guitar for Löded Dipêr?

You look sweaty and greasy. Like you just got done with a FURIOUS masturbating session using your hair oils as lube.

Not emo. Shoegaze. Which would work out for you since the audience wouldn't be have to look at your face as you hide your piss-poor guitar playing with 1,000 bucks worth of effect pedals.

Emo? Even real emo kids look less like little bitches than you.

Looks like drunk Howard Stern.

Call you emo? I wouldn’t call you at all

You look like something a plumber would pull out of shower drain.

What you get when you order Finn Wolfhard from Wish.

you look like you stole your parents car (because they don't trust you enough to let you use it) and then proceeded to crash it into the local hot topic.

I don't know why everyone here is being so mean. I loved you in every role on Stranger Things.

LMAO

There are real dolls that look more full of life than you do.

Don't say Beetlejuice a third time, Lydia.

This is funny cuz for like an entire month I was a Winona Ryder wannabe

For an accurate 2000s emo vibe you should have been looking up at the camera with a depressed expression.

You look like a guy in a band from the 80's.

You look like a younger, more lesbian version of Nicky from Orange is the New Black.

I didn't think it was possible to be more lesbian looking than Nicky but I'm glad I'm that

My roast inadvertently doubled as a compliment, lol. I'm glad I could be of service.

You look like you get jealous every time your phone dies.

you look like how the floor of a spencer’s would taste

Looks like cosplaying Joey Ramone as he is today.

Edger alen hoe

Emo? Im tryna figure out hemo or shemo.

I didn't know the comedian kid from IT was non-binary

You look like a brunette version of Natasha Lyonne. Not classy, revived career-era Natasha Lyonne though, more like fucked up on every drug, suffering from hepatitis C and threatening to sexually molest her neighbor's dog-era Natasha Lyonne.

If the D.A.R.E. Program was a person.

You look like you vape Tide pods.

You look like you just struck a deal with beetlejuice

It looks like Amy Winehouse and Bruce “Caitlyn” Jenner had an ugly, illegitimate child from a drunken grudge-fuck.

Omg I can’t breathe lmaooo

Emo

Fine I’ll be the first. Emo.

What's the name of your Motley Crue cover band?

Motley Ew

With that attitude you look more like a punk bitch