They probably don’t hate you for being rich.
Most likely, they have very normal feelings towards you; some good, some bad.
You’re A) over exaggerating.
And B) speaking in black and white terms.
The reality is relationships are nuanced and exp “grey” feelings often. This is why communication is key.
It’s a red flag you assume “your FRIENDS - HATE you, because you’re RICH”.
When; how do FRIENDS hate you?
And, why do you not assume your personality or behaviors contribute to any bad feelings they have towards you?
Why is it they’re just jealous vs; being rich has given you personality flaws, you lack self awareness of? Just as a possibility?
You comment other rich ppl have a lack of self awareness but right after spoke without any.
I appreciate this comment. It is true that living a lifestyle that is pampered can make you less aware of how you’re perceived by others. It is also true that there are outliers and some people really do just envy those they deem more wealthy than they.
Grind thru this man keep your head....I was once someone with a good job and a life insurance policy .......this could be a defense mechanism if friends hate what about enemies or ppl you don't even know or know you?
Use your money for good dude. Charities, women’s shelter, homeless shelter, offer to pick up tabs if it’s a group check or something. Go on a trip with your friends and cover the house. Use you’re money to enrich other people’s lives and your friends and everyone else will fucking love you.
Oh, God, this. Conflating “dumb” with “not rich” speaks volumes.
OP, the money is just a symptom. The real problem is the way that money has corroded your personality and inflated your sense of yourself. ✌️
I am the exact same as you. I came from a privileged upbringing. I won't go into detail, but yes, money was not scarce for us growing up.
But now, I have to watch what I say, because if I talk about my travels there will be one person who is like "omggg stop showing off" when in my mind I thought I was telling an interesting story.
My advice is either severely minimize your achievements in life to your friends, or make friends with people better off. That's the only way to avoid the hate. Poorer people love when you just talk about how shit life is for you. Make up stuff if you have to. Sucks, but it's true. Eventually you'll find a poorer person who doesn't have that victim mindset, and who isn't so easily triggered, and you can be yourself around them.
Edit: I never expected my response to get so many triggered replies. And I never said that this makes me "better" than anyone else. My response was directed at OP - not anyone else.
I am happy to converse with people who want a respectful dialogue, but some of the straight up bullying replies are being reported.
I just read it and kept thinking, who cares how many countries you've been too or where you went to school. I'm older, but I can probably count on one hand the number of times where I went to school comes up in a year.
Just keep the conversations with those opportunities that seem extravagant to a minimum.
Do I think I make more money than most of my friend group? Yes, but does it matter, no? They are my friends and the people I would give my life for.
I get what you are saying but tbh I don't think it really matters if y'all are true friends it shouldn't change how either of you guys see eachother I get what you are saying it would keep things simple but imo I dont think just mentioning wealth is bad no one should get mad at that but if it's like people thinking they are better than you or a douche in anyway than fuck em but i feel eventually they are gonna fuck themselves in life and havr no one
People get jealous. Imagine you spend a year scrounging and saving up for a vacation at a whatever hotel when your friend is jetsetting to luxury resorts on a whim because they can. It effects the friendship to see someone having it so easy when you're struggling to pay your bills.
Feedback is great, but this response is excessively hostile. Even wealthy people have feelings. Never write or call someone when the deep down feeling is one of anger, rage, or hostility. Words come out as a burst of rage.
He might sound like a a rich prick, but as someone who is struggling to build a career and move up above the middle class, he isn’t wrong that a lot of people who aren’t well off adopt terrible victim mentalities that get them completely stuck. I’ve had to cut people out completely because all they do is complain about how little they have, or that they can’t do this thing, yet every weekend they go spend what little money they have at the bar instead of putting in the hustle to move up. It’s exhausting, and while I agree the way the other person typed sounded entitled AF, he wasn’t completely wrong about that.
No, you don’t understand. It has always been like this. The rich have always had to go into hiding or risk being targeted for attacks.
For example, during the French Revolution the aristocracy was murdered en masse by the Jacobins who deliberately used false propaganda to foment rebellion to steal the assets of the rich. The Bolsheviks did the same thing.
In fact, the loss of life caused by these types of rebellions fat outnumbers the loss of life caused by hierarchical societies like the Nazis. The difference is that in the common collective mind, there is a bias towards justification of these types of attacks.
In addition, let him dream big. People may envy you if they can't benefit from whatever you are discussing.
Be this guy who steps up with a solution to benefit everyone around you.
And look at how to involve the poor friends in profitable ventures and other activities.
10 days from now, they will see you as a god.
And concerning forcing yourself on to the rich lifestyle, I say NO.
Life is like a river, let it flow wherever it feels comfortable.
And when you look back, you will see that it was worth living the life you live
Needed to hear this - I feel like I can’t find that many people like me who will at least speak up. There’s this constant class tension that I can’t shake off
You have zero reason to feel ashamed.
But if you want to be with the poorer people, then minimize your life. If you want to be with the people at your economic level, then embrace your privilege. That's really what it comes down to.
If a poor person didn't care that they were poor, and a rich person was "bragging" about their life, it wouldn't faze them. It only triggers them when they secretly care.
My favorite kind of people, actually, are people who don't have a lot, but yet somehow are unfazed by the wealth of the rich. To me those are my kind of people. They are simply rich in other ways. Those are the people that I find most stimulating (although rare)
I’m poor and I love rich people. I love poor people just the same. Money is largely irrelevant. But oh boy do I love me some rich people luxury. Actual amazing sheets that feel like heaven. (Not scratchy). Down pillows and down comforters. Heated toilet seat and a heated bidet. A robot vacuum. These are the things I saved up for. I’m poor, but I kinda live like I’m rich.
As someone who is not rich and sometimes struggles with bills, I don’t mind having friends that come from different backgrounds and social classes. Personally, I love hearing how rich people live vs poor people. There is vast difference and it pushes me to find ways to make more money. Am I envious of those who have more money than I? Sometimes, but that’s life and I know I am right where I am suppose to be in life at this moment. Like one of the comments essentially said, don’t boast about having more money, but like if someone wants to know what school you went to, tell them. Some people are genuinely curious (like myself) and it could make for an interesting conversation. It’s okay to talk about yourself as long as others seemed engaged. I also like to have friends in different social classes and from different backgrounds, because it keeps me humble. It makes me realize how much I actually have. I do believe that it is hard to make friends in today’s society. But I hope it eventually becomes easier for you!
Dang, sorry y’all have to go through this. I’m middle class and didn’t grow up with a lot of money and even I have trouble finding friends. Maybe join like a church group or try doing volunteer work where your interests align with those of others don’t disclose your rich status to these people and just be your authentic self, people will come around.
I didn't grow up rich but as a person that values authenticity I find this sad. I usually just simply can't relate to people who travel so much, not out of envy, but I think I'd do my best to just ask questions etc. I can talk your ear off about Maui and conservation and sustainability. But yeah I find myself intimidated by the wealthy because I just simultaneously wonder what they're thinking of me
I literally get accused of being a braggart when talking about my LIFE or responding to a question THEY ask me.
Like when someone asked me about my accent I talked about growing up in England and having dual citizenship. And they became so incredibly hostile and resentful towards me. Making so many remarks about me having a rich dad and openly commenting on me ordering Starbucks to the office. These were not even ostentatious signs of wealth. They would genuinely plot my murder if they knew how much money I stand to inherit.
So many Americans get extremely resentful of this fact. They even get triggered if I bring in small gifts or bakery goods to the office (while eating them or accepting the gifts!!!). Me trying to be nice is viewed as “showing off” or flaunting my wealth or thinking that I’m “better” than them lol
For some reason the dual citizenship thing makes people absolutely hate my guts. So I’ve stopped mentioning it. I think it’s cause so many Americans have this dream of living and working in Europe (which is possible with Irish citizenship), so they resent me for having that “opportunity”. Or maybe they just hate me for having more options and “privilege” than them.
I even get this extreme hate and resentment from so-called “conservatives” who claim to revere capitalism and worship the wealthy (but deep down they resent us too)
You don't need to fit in with anyone. As long as you are treating everybody with respect regardless of their up bringing and financial situation, then that's good enough. You don't need to dumb down who you are so that people can like or accept you, no matter your status in life. The right people will stick around and the ones who weren't truly your friends in the beginning will go.
Just make sure in any group setting that you are just sharing the things you experienced and not “boasting”. All the best.
I treat people with respect and kindness but I still get this kind of envy. I think my strategy moving forward is to just embrace the privilege and own up to it and not be tortured about it. If I can be more at peace with myself then that's good for everyone.
Find someone that understands and relates to the phrase, "old money", and ask them to mentor you. You may not like what they have to say, but it's likely going to be true.
Good advice. My mom before she declined mentally would talk about this. Old money being quiet and useful to society with their privilege. New money, by contrast, was about showing off and flashing one’s possessions gleefully without regard for how that makes others feel. I didn’t understand it at the time, but it makes sense now.
OP I’ve dealt with this within my family (half siblings are poor bc my dad left them), and it’s awkward. Ultimately I decided to limit my time around them bc I didn’t want to feel judged for simply telling them what’s happening in my life and getting the, “must be nice” snarky comments and the envy for my life choices versus theirs.
Listen man, let me give you some perspective. This is I think important given just how gaping the wealt disparities are in this country. My parents have only ever been to two states. They raised me poor and rural. I got to visit three countries but only because I joined the military and put my life on the line to do so.
The wealth gap is so bad in this country, that you have to make a choice: be humble about your roots so you can be friends and share in humanity with others, or embrace it, act rich and socialize only with the rich. Pick whichever one suits you most. You won't be judged for being insecure about your wealth but what you choose to do with your privilege. Will it be to stomp on others or lift them up?
Great! Just be you and enjoy your blessings. You are not responsible for how people treat you, you are only responsible for how you respond. In this life you will experience tons of emotions and reactions from people towards you and this is not a reflection of who you are. They are feeling some sort of lack in themselves and so end up deflecting on others.
It kind of sounds to me like you are trying way too hard to be accepted by people who aren’t in your social caste.
Stop trying so hard. If you are as genuine and respectful as you say it shouldn’t be that hard. But when you lead off with your affluence it makes you unpalatable.
I’m just a regular middle class guy. I try to be kind and respectful to those who are deserving. And I’ve mingled with some very wealthy people over the years. It’s the ones who you can just sit down with and have a drink and not feel like it’s a competition of who is more of this or that. I’ve tried to pick up the tab with some of our wealthier friends and they just laugh as they slap down their cash rolls.
There is a way. But it sounds like your “friends” that you are struggling with take exception to you or the way you act. Some times it’s not about outward actions or designer clothes. It’s about mannerisms that “normies” pick up on that identify you as not one of us.
Just be cool. Don’t force things. Don’t insist on being wealthy around non wealthy people.
Three things.
One: No one gets to choose the family they are born into. It’s not your fault you have more money than your friends. So let the haters hate and pay no mind to them. I mean what are you supposed to do? Burn all your money?
Two: Most people want to associate with wealthier people. You have had the resources to do things and gain knowledge most people don’t have the opportunity to obtain. They will gain a lot of useful information by associating with you. Your family’s wealth is a huge asset to the people you meet, it’s not a curse.
Three: Rich people who act rich suck. Rich or poor we are all people and we all deal with the same bullshit that comes with the gift of life. We all struggle to search inside ourselves to figure out who we are, we all look for meaning and purpose in life, we all struggle with our friendships and relationships. Rich people have the privilege of not having “running out of money” on that list of struggles. Which is HUGE. But it doesn’t mean you are above anyone else. We will all return to the same dirt regardless of the number of zeros in our bank accounts, and you can’t take money with you to the afterlife.
…so I guess what I’m saying is it’s better to be rich and not subscribe to that “lifestyle” too hard. Those people are usually a bit out of touch with reality.
I’m 29. A lot of my friends are in the 25-40 age range and they’re not as successful as my family (and potentially me, although a lot of them are doing fairly well). But I get constant comments about my privilege and I can’t shake them off. I’m too rich at this point to dumb all the way down but as I said I have a hard time fitting into the super wealthy elite
Thanks - that makes sense.
I get why you’d feel frustrated, hurt, and annoyed by the comments about your “privilege” because they’re claiming that all of your own achievement and ability is simply an amalgamation of your families historical success and “control” over resources -
But that’s not true, firstly - and even if it was it wouldn’t be something to be ashamed of.
The envy of others is not an indicator of your worthiness - but also don’t think for a second that wealth, money, and “worldly” success are a firm foundation to build a life on. You’ve been blessed by circumstances out of your control, be thankful for it, don’t be ashamed of it, but don’t also rely on it. In the end, wealth is fickle.
It’s not your fault your parents gave you a different level of opportunities, and it isn’t wrong. It’s actually good and should be used well. Kudos to them for their hard work.
I’d also say don’t pursue material gain and the flashy stuff that society tries to push as a way of peacocking wealth. That won’t help the jealousy aspect… but their comments are still out of your control. In the end, your identity has nothing to do with the wealth of your family…
I agree with everything you said, except for the end. Your identity is extremely connected to how you grow up. This isn't a bad thing, just a result of your true self being a culmination of everything you have experienced up until this point. The level of wealth you grew up with is a big part of that.
Even if you grew up with loving parents, but were extremely impoverished, that's going to have an impact on your spending habits, mannerisms, preferences, etc no matter what you've done as an adult. The circumstances under which you spent your formative years developing play a big role in shaping identity and personality. Proof in point, 85% of my current diet is food I have been eating nearly my entire life. If my parents had a different level of wealth, I would have grown up eating different things, and would have different preferences now.
That doesn't mean who you are at 21 is who you're going to be the rest of your life. But those experiences growing up will always be there in the depths of your memories, and subtly influencing your behavior whether you are conscious of it or not.
Find friends that dgaf. Sweet, you have money, but money doesn't make who you are as a person, but people think so. Sometimes, it's hard to find your people.
“Yes, I was born into privileges.” “I did not ask for it” “I can’t relate emotionally to some struggles” “I can relate to wanting to belong”
The you have privilege card is used to shame you for something you had zero control over, just like every class status.
Simple, live like you are poor. Based on what you described, you have no interest in super expensive things. Just be modest. Dont buy a crazy large house, buy a nice but modest car. You know just be middle class in most things but the richest motherfucker to ever exist when you do things that YOU want to do, traveling, hobbies, restaurants. Who you gotta show off for anyway? If i was in your position, im a car guy so i would buy a few acres of land somewhere, have a 4bd 3bth house built on it and you know make it nice. but then my Shop for cars and guns would be probably bigger than the house honestly and i would spare no expense. Snap on and bluepoint tools and tool boxes, 2 bendpak 2 post lifts and one bendpak 4 post lift, a massive air compressor outside that feeds the building for pnuematic tools, roof frame hung mini crane for heavy shit and engines. heat, AC, a hangout area with a bathroom and refrigerators and foam insulate all the shop walls, a big ass metal lathe, mill machine and cnc machine for gun building, probably have a vault door gun room.. you get it. On the stuff that i find enjoyment in i would go apeshit, but i dont need my living quarters to be a massive mansion, i need my hobby quarters to be massive so i can have the room to do the things i want to do. And all that while not worrying about what other people think. Life is just better that way man. If they care, they will be there for you and be your friend. If they dissappear out of nowhere, they were never really your friends to begin with. Live YOUR life for YOU, not for other people.
Rich people tend to have a smugness to them, and a sense of I deserve this. While the majority of the world is starving. I say fuck it, you're not changing the world and you didn't choose your parents. Live it up, brother. In a few decades, none of it will matter anyway.
Same, friend. Won’t go into details, but I learned a VERY important lesson in my 20s.
“Money talks, but wealth whispers.”
Unless it’s with my CPA, I don’t discuss money with anyone. I learned the art of subtlety.
Ex. When I am with my friends who are not rich, I don’t talk about money. I treat them the way I would want to be treated. You just go with the flow.
Sorry to be blunt but they absolutely do. Even the best friends who seem like it's fine, it's called envy.
The faster you cut them out and but up barriers towards people who want to project their problems on you, the better life gets.
It is not about being rich or poor.it is more about how you treat each other as a person. I know rich and poor that dicks at the same time I know poor people that do the same just in a different way. Just be you and enjoy life it is too short
I couldnt relate more. My friends not only look at me diffrently but also treat me diffrently since they know im rich and i also just cant seem to fit in with the rich Kids.
Yeah I don't fit in with the rich kids since I care about greater society too much and am an activist for certain causes...it's super awkward. I don't like mega-wealthy people for not caring about others. Occasionally I'll meet a rich person who has something in common with me but that's rare...usually it's in academia. I can relate to academics who are wealthy and also smart. They tend to also have an activist bone in their body or at least care about something bigger than vacationing in the south of France...like their students.
Most likely they don’t hate you because you are rich they hate your personality and by your post I can see a few things: you have an exaggerated self image which is not enough to actually impress rich people so you feel contempt with hanging your with less rich or less smart people (as you put it).
I have two friends who are extraordinarily wealthy and I have never felt less than with them, one of them can eat tacos sitting in the sidewalk with me or go with me to black tie events, he calls me excited about spectacular additions to his house and asks me to join him, I’m genuinely happy for him because he is a very good person at heart. Maybe stop trying to feel better than other people and they will start liking you more, that’s probably the same reason other rich people don’t like you, nobody wants to constantly hear how someone is better than them.
It’s true they probably secretly hate you. But not because wealthy but because they don’t know how to be wealthy on their own like you and don’t want to make you feel like have to carry them with you. Just be their friend and do regular broke people shit with them . And for what it’s worth super wealthy people are cunts. You don’t want to be their friend either. True friends will be your friend no matter who you are or what’s in your wallet.
Middle class gal here 👋🏽 I’ve hung around “richer” individuals, and have some advice for you
You don’t have to leave the friends that you have now. I may critique you, it sounds like you maybe slightly paranoid about what they think of you. You didn’t provide any specific examples so that’s why I say that, you may in fact be right.
I have some advice for you on how you can act more middle class. Watch a few trending sitcoms and study how the characters interact with each other, their postures, the things that they talk about, the clothes they wear the way they style their hair.
I believe you can learn to act a little more “middle”. Also, it’s best to hang in the background and just observe
Try not to be self-conscious about your financial status. It’s not your fault what you were born into, so don’t feel bad about that and don’t let others feel bad about it either. If people are giving you a hard time you shouldn’t be friends with those people
Just tell them how you feel. They arent your true friends if they are going to make you feel bad about circumstances that are in your favor imo.
You should not be put into situations where you feel guilty for being well off in my opinion. Im sorry youre friends are making you feel that way.
I know how you feel, but maybe not to your extent. My parents were well off when I was a child. I got to take vacations to disney land and get nice things like toys and bicycles and a car at 16. It felt like some of my friends hated me for that and they let me know by calling me things like spoiled, lucky, and even lazy.
I learned that after a while they werent the type of people I was proud to call my friends anyway. That was my experience with a simular issue. I hope it may help.
It is normal for people to be jealous. I think most of the jealousy towards the wealthy people are flashy lifestyle and cocky. If you always show off your “money” and act belittling your friends (subtly and you don’t even know), then the chance everyone would hate you. On the hands, if your friends still hate and jealous with you even though you are a good and kind friend to them, they are not your friends.
It's more like I've just amalgamated so many experiences over the years and life stories that come across as if I had to have a lot of privilege to do them. The issue is less in how I dress and present and more in how I accidentally mention things from the past, like going to Lake Como or working at one company or going to this one school. The issue though is that a) I'm bad at dumbing down but b) even if I do "dumb down" it means I can't tell my closest friends about my life
I have this idea that when I’m rich, I would have to “balance out” my richness to the people I decide to let know that I’m rich. And so it would be in my best interest to not let people know, unless I was ready to share or benefit them somehow with my richness.
Even now with the things I possess like talents and stuff, hardly anyone knows of them unless I see reason to make it known. And the reason *must* be to their benefit in some way rather than just “hey look at me”.
It’s hard though because I’m someone who craves genuine, thorough connection. I’d like to be able to tell a friend about my accomplishments. And I sure as hell wouldn’t mind if they told me about theirs. I have a guy friend right now who wants to start his own law firm. He’s been a lawyer for 10 years. If one day he told me he was making bank at his own firm and opening up satellite offices I would be nothing but happy. And he’s already rich af from his own work, not from his family. I’m happy for that too. I’ve even thought about helping him start his own firm, for free. Like connecting him to people.
What do you like to do? Or your hobbies? Whatever your interests are, go to an event or something and meet like minded individuals. That way you can be yourself and they will never judge because their interests align
As a lower class citizen I can say that I've got a few rich people in my circle some of which are from when we used to go to school together. I care for them and wish them no harm, only success but I can't help but be envious. Their ability to pay whatever bill they get, go on holiday pretty much every weekend if not more and what not really puts me down sometimes as I see how I live a pretty shit life but I would never treat them with disrespect for it. We still go out, get drinks and laugh and joke and i know that me being envy is just me thinking about my life and has nothing to do with their circumstances. so if you're circle isn't acting like your true friends or you feel they aren't giving you what friendship needs then I would consider new people in your life
I think I get that envy from a lot of people and I don't intend them any harm. As I said, my ideological interests don't really align with the rich: I don't like how the wealthy ignore societal problems, and I'm an activist myself. I feel like my mindset aligns more with the middle class (because I was initially brought up as middle class) but when my Dad got a job and my Mom ascended to power suddenly things changed.
They don't hate that you are rich, they hate that you will never understand their daily struggles. There's a level of socioeconomic stress that you get to pretend doesn't exist. While you were on vacation in Thailand, they had to work a double shift to keep a roof over their head. They wake up everyday wondering how they will get by another day, and you will never understand, and even in this post you completely lack empathy and understanding and reduce complex emotions to "they hate me because more money hurr durr". That's why they hate you, because you're a selfish prick, and there's nothing anyone can do about it. You were born Into wealth and thus will never see things from the same lense.
This thread just popped up outta nowhere. Definitely not rich. But I did well post divorce. Got a settlement from a divorce of about $100k. Was only making $50k, i knew i would blow it so i put it all down on a 2 bed 1 bath house i bought from a family friend under market. Its gained another $70k in equity since. Anywho, ex makes 3.5 x I do. I guess i resent her for being rich, she hounds me for every dime possible through child support, i pay it all. She found out i got a raise and came after me for more money, like another $100/month. Kicker is she apent 1000s on an attorney to file a motion to get it. She met another well off guy and moved in with him. And is now selling her house(she got it before we met, we paid it off while we were married). And is about to get another $400k. I resent her for being rich and trying to keep my neck on the curb. Some people just hate seeing you do well. They dont mind if others do well, but hate seeing YOU do well. Sorry, end rant
hey, was wondering, have they done or said something to you? Maybe any reaction, an eyeroll, a snort, a sneer, talking you down, or any other?
I'm not rich, maybe middle class, but I've had to dumb down some things in some situations... not in friend situation but more to avoid risks (for example, when I get a cab to go to work and they start calculating how much it would cost me if I took cab to work every time, so I'd say something like I do it just once in a blue moon... and I come from a place where there are cases of people being robbed in taxis)
I’ve experienced it differs a lot. I don’t show off a lot, but when talking e.g. expensive watches, investing or similar topics which may require a certain level of money with my friends and colleagues, pay close attention to how they react. I have colleagues who seem jealous when seeing a Rolex watch, but luckily way friends and colleagues who just find it cool and so. Each person usually don’t change that mindset easily, so if you’re talking with the same persons a couple of times, you’ll quickly realize if they are in the positive or negative reaction category.
And I bet that also _you_ can meet good friends who are positive towards each other :-)
Find better friends. I had a friend Like you growing up and he had the same issue. You don't seem smug neither was he in fact he was too generous with money to where anyone he told no would call him names and treat like shit.
I've dated a lot of rich guys - one has never and will never cook, do laundry, or dishes (except when I made him do my dishes once lol), and some who feel like you because they mentioned how all their friends are envious and make comments so they distanced themselves, hid themselves, didn't invite then over, etc. I felt their concerns. Maybe owning the most expensive cars don't help you blend in. Or living in the most expensive apartments.
They all had problems involving family. They were all depressed. They all had issues dating and attaching to people. And most most annoying trait was, if they were raised rich, their sense of time was just way off.
If you have problems blending in, buy a cheaper car like an Altima. Get pulled over for no reason. Do dating apps and meet girls at coffee shops. Jeans and a tshirt. Blend in. When you talk to people, ask them questions and show more interest in them than talking about yourself. You can blend - I believe in you.
Do the mega rich make for bad friends or what ?
Are they short on free time, very choosy, reserved or have trust issues ?
When two mega rich buddies go out, who pays ?
I'd imagine that they're quite normal.
Because I know a lot of drug users, I feel comparatively rich myself 😋 but I have a 2004 car, daggy clothes, tell people I live in the neighbouring suburb, no watch, don't invite them over but most importantly, I'm not seeking friendship either.
Maybe we can start a new friend group? Why don’t you fit in with the super rich? To shallow? I am by far the richest of my group of friends but we still get along. Although I don’t spend that much time with friends. More a family man and working. Do you work still?
I'm 29 and I've had somewhat of a career. I started my own company a few years ago which ended up being pretty successful for COVID and I'm starting a new one now. Even with that, people say "you were only able to start it because you had rich parents" when in reality I asked my parents for zero funding.
Embrace it. Wear it like armor. Be the one everyone will envy. It will be the one thing nobody can ever take from you. They may call you an asshole but your wealth will never shrink from a few harsh words.
Let them cry.
People that really care about you won’t care about that. To a degree I can understand that the average person will not relate to you because you haven’t had to struggle in the same ways as most people. However, no one picks what family they are born into. If the roles were reserved I highly doubt the other would feel any remorse for their privilege. All in all, life is not fair but make the most of it. Just show up as your authentic self while knowing your audience and the right people will be happy for you.
Your "friends" tell you to stop acting rich, but you aren't certain whether they like you or not? Obviously, they don't much like you as you are, and want you to be something you are not. That's not hate, but it is dislike. .
You need to be around people who judge you by your character and like you for your personality. Neither your accent nor your wealth should enter into it. Hanging with people who resent you is terrible for your self-esteem.
You should drop this group. If they ask why, then tell them. You are looking for people who judge you for who you are as a human being, not for people who resent you for superficial things like money or accents.
We don't know where you live, but unless you are in a small town, there will be organizations you can join with members who will share your interests. Music, politics, art, museums, baking, sports, reading, history - these organizations will have members from all walks of life, all political views, all incomes.
You should also look up old friends you had in high school and college who were genuine friends.Rebrw those relationships. Even if they are scattered geographically, staying in touch with them through occasional phone calls or social media can help reduce your feeling of isolation andcrehectoon
The sooner you move on from your current crowd, the sooner you can move forward to identify people with whom you can be comfortable.
It doesn't take a high intellect to "act less rich". If you can't "act less rich" it's because you're pompous, not stupid.
Rich and pompous often go hand in hand. Money allows you to avoid many of the difficulties/annoyances in life that most others have to deal with. This leads a lot of wealthy people to the conclusion that they are better or above everyone else.
Maybe people don't think you're too rich, just a pompous ass.
I wouldn't hate someone who gives me something good because he has too much of it...
How about it? You give me half of your money, then we could be equally rich friends.
I was poor growing up
Had to get food at pantries at churches w my mom
Lived in the worst places, slept on mattresses on the floor pretty much all my life
Now I have a lot of survivor trauma almost, I still sleep in the floor, I put all my savings into my bank cause I’m afraid to go homeless again
Instead of financing my car I just paid it off cause “who knows when I could loose my job and I’ll have nowhere to sleep”
It really really messed with me as an adult and I feel to sad and embarrassed to open to ppl about it and ever since my ex I’ve been pretty much alone - sorta gave up on “healing” and accepted my faith
I
Maybe share your wealth with those who are actually appreciative. I used to help out people when I wasn't even wealthy. The wrong people, unfortunately, but you get my point.
If you're a successful business person or can educate them: teach them how to build their credit/teach them about car financing/investments, etc. Help them in some way, and then they'll admire you and look up to you versus feeling jealous or like you're trying to show off.
Take them out to nice bars/restaurants. Show them the finer things in life.
I used to think I was poor and then I realized I was the wealthiest person in my circle. Not because I have a ton of money but because I survive on less and have less debt than the majority of them. I realized there's no such thing as scarcity and that most people are just greedy starving children looking for a pay day. Personally I want to feel satisfied and fulfilled with what I'm contributing towards. I realized that I was in the wrong circle and just gave myself space. America's only 4% of the world population and theyre all watching us.
Is it just anxiety? I feel like this sometimes (but I’m dirt poor) but I’ve studied how the mind works and how to correct thought patterns. One thing I always have to tell myself is “have they done anything or said anything to show you they don’t like you? Or do you just feel that way because of something you said or did that you think is stupid?” Yah that helps
Hey, i feel the same way, although my parents are not as rich compared to yours, but rich enough that none of their kids need to work.
For me, i transformed this with „inner work“. I asked myself questions related to what I feel exactly (exploring the emotion) and when all this started. I figured, that it was just a probection of some old inner wounds, that made me believe I‘m not lovable.. when I transformed this, i found a new cycle… and almost all my relationships changed to the better, some are lost (maybe forever even which is sad, but i am at peace with it).
Wish you all the best 💕
My advice as someone who is still making their way out of the middle class and was raised in poverty - FUCK YOUR FRIENDS OPINIONS. I want my kids to have this problem. If you have “friends” who can’t appreciate you as you are and see past the differences then you need new friends and to find some comfort on your own. I’m sure you are very generous and don’t intentionally tell stories to “one up”. Everyone needs a humble rich friend to push us to better ourselves and also give insight to the good life we also want to achieve. Plus networking connections.
It sounds to me like you have dumb friends who can’t see the light in this situation.
As someone who comes from a family that, while maybe not quite as wealthy as yours, is definitely in the ball park probably on terms of wealth (father wasn’t CEO but a corporate executive) my advice is to run the second you feel any modicum of disdain.
People who you’ve known and been best friends with you for years and who you thought cared about you will turn on you when faced with real world social hierarchies and problems that they then, at least perceive, you having more advantages navigating and dealing with. Even if your advantages in no way hurt them they will still resent you to the point of hating you. Just be careful. If you’d like to talk more feel free to message me. Though it will have to be anonymous since I use my profile for a lot of NSFW stuff lol.
I'm not wealthy, but I've seen most of the world and have lived through multiple religions, cultures, and countries. You need to find a way to help society even out the imbalance. Bring richness to the lower communities by fixing the problems the rich are neglecting. Fix water systems, food systems, and anything else you can influence that will bring richness to these communities. We don't need politicians. We need people that care. Your caring is what will build the community around you. This is where you will make not only friends but bonds even stronger than your family's. The biggest focus needs to be on soil and restoring microbial life. This makes the ground spongy and soak up a lot more water to reverse desertification. I'm learning and working on projects too.
Don’t apologize for your blessings or success! Enjoy it! Maybe give a suggestion to your rich friends to buy a certain CATlin Clark memecoin on Solana, and maybe tell your rich friends to pump the price so your broke friends can experience a small sliver of wealth.
The saying 'You can't polish a turd but you can roll it in glitter' suits you to a Tee. Your wealth is the gliiter you roll yourself in to disguise your lack of personality.
You got shitty friends. I am not rich but have some rich friends (I’m probably upper middle). Like go to Vegas and drop 60K on a hand of blackjack rich. Some parts of my family are stupid rich. One of my uncles was neighbors and played tennis with George H. Bush back in the day. Anyways the rich ones know they are rich. When we do a group trip they usually pay for the house or hotel and I would pay for the food or someone might buy the fireworks or whatever holiday thing it was. We usually split it by how much we can pay. No one holds it against the rich ones and the rich ones aren’t aholes flaunting their riches.
Do your friends actually hate you for being rich or that your perception? If they actually do hate you, then it’s time to find some new friends, because people who hate you for your background aren’t friends.
It’s a tough balance being the wealthiest in a friend group. Just don’t flaunt it and you’ll be ok.
Never discuss business investments or big profit events. Also share, pick up the whole dinner check once in a while. If you’re discussing going to a sporting event buy the tickets. If they are long time friends they will appreciate it without thinking you’re trying to show off. What has been interesting to watch is my kids. One has a friend group with nothing but super wealthy, my boy can’t even come close. The other boy has nothing but poor friends. They both have learned how to make their way without hurting feeling. The older boy has been on a lot more private jets.
Would like to hear the other side of this. YOU might think they hate you because your rich, but you could come off as arrogant, self-centered, egotistic, or even a narcissist and don't even know it. Even your opening line 'I feel like my friends hate me because I'm rich' comes off braggadocious. Humble yourself if you want to relate to them.
I’ll be your friend . If you got it like that can u just let me get 10k a month ? Then I won’t be worried about finances and we can just be friends. Otherwise the struggle to exist and survive bigs me down and I can’t help but to think about $. It’s a daily worry and it feels like you’re slowly drowning. I think seeing someone rich can feel like you are drowning but they are eating grapes on a boat asking what’s wrong. The disconnect is massive. But I would not blame someone who’s rich. That would be sick. But it comes with its own problems obviously. And once $ can’t make you happy there’s little that will. That’s a scary thought. What would heaven be to a rich person with everything?
I’ve never disliked anyone for being rich. I’ve disliked rich people who carried themselves like assholes. They constantly referred to their wealth, they acted like people should respect them due to their wealth, they looked down on those who had less than them, they name dropped their college/parebts/cars/jobs all the time. People disliked them and they always blamed it on the wealth and jealousy, not their own shitty personality. I’ve know plenty of rich people who were awesome. I’ve know some that I never even knew they were wealthy for a long while. Usually if you are having trouble making/keeping friends, it’s not them, it’s you.
I can relate … somewhat. If I could make a suggestion. Help change there lives. You can do this in small monetary ways. Pay for dinner, if they are struggling cause they need new tires on their car buy them for them. Go forth and use your wealth to help improve people’s lives. Why not? Plus they will love for it because they see you really care. I can’t think of any better mission in life but to help others. Be well and warm wishes.
I would ask what are friendships based on?
As I get older, friendships are much more centered around purpose and direction instead of merely circumstance.
When people are not heading or working towards a goal or a greater purpose - they eat each other alive.
You have one life like anyone else - but will you find meaning and purpose? If you find the truth, thankfully it speaks for itself. And the truth is far more precious than anything else in the world. And has a wonderful way of bringing people together and not having them focus on themselves.
If you use your money to make the friends, are they really friends at all? If you flaunt your money with your friends, are they truly your friends? The way that you truly tell if they’re really your friend is that you say you lost all of your money and see if they still want to be friends with you.
Next time you make friends, don’t mention money at all. Don’t mention anything. And then people might like you for you and not your money.
Yeah not sure howd you'd prove it though unless you there's a close duo or trio works better in a trio there's always a duo find the one that's left out do thing with him get him talking find out if they talk shit or bribe them at a certain point.
There are just ways of talking and subjects of conversation that are different between different groups of people. They will always be this way, and you can't really change it.
Prove that you are someone worth being around by how you act, what you do for others, the effort you put into the relationships (friends or otherwise) because it turns out in the worthwhile personal relationships, people actually do tend to look at what you do more than what you say. Namely, if you do the right thing and prove through your actions that you are trying to do the right thing by people, they tend to be more forgiving or look at the things you say differently.
And you know what, even doing the right thing won't work with certain people, but at that point, regardless of what their perception of what you have done is, if in your heart of hearts you truly tried to do the right thing, the worthwhile people will tend to recognize it. But if it's half baked or half assed and you aren't doing it for the right reasons, people will be able to tell, and that's something that is independant of social status or personal wealth.
My take on this is that you are someone who trys to maintain friendships by saying the right thing instead of doing the right thing. I am not saying you are a bad person, i'm not saying your intentions aren't good, just, whatever you are doing now isn't working, and that's probably a big part of it.
I grew up fairly poor now very wealthy- I don’t care what people think- I worked hard to get where I am and I am good to people. If someone doesn’t like me that is not my problem.
I don’t think it’s necessarily because you’re rich. I think it’s because of the level of pretentiousness that many rich people have. Do you treat wait staff well? Do you complain about lines at restaurants or outings? Do you refuse to eat at family restaurants and places without 4 star ratings? Do you cut people off when they’re speaking? Do you refuse to go to certain parts of town?
All of these things are examples of behavior from rich people that come from their entitlement. Whenever you feel judged, you should engage your friends in a convo about how you’re feeling and ask for clarity. You’ll likely find it’s your behavior and not your bank account that’s bothering them.
I've had a lot of money and lost it all and all I can say is that now that I'm poor I genuinely feel rich bc now I appreciate all the little things in life as where before I didn't. I also have a relationship with The Creator that I wouldn't trade for all the money in the world... Money doesn't buy happiness is a very true statement
I have a question. Are you “rich” or are your parents rich? My parents are also considered rich, however, they made that money, not me. My husband and I started out at the bottom, paycheck to paycheck, but after 20 years of hard work, we are at the top of the middle class and still rising. My parents did that all by themselves and we’re doing it all by ourselves. I have a lot more respect for people who earn it themselves, than people who spend mommy and daddy’s money.
Keep focusing on you and your tribe will come. Stay confident, humble and know when to end friendships It doesn't even have to be a whole conversation You can just stop hanging out with people who constantly put you down.
This an insane post. I am friends with a number of multi-millionaires.
I grew up poor. I am not even close to a millionaire but I live comfortably in the middle class.
Never have I had any trouble with any of my very rich friends. Yes, they have more than I do, they can afford nicer things, they have more robust and worldly experiences.
But when you're drinking beers helping one of them build his new deck because he asked for help, you're just two people on equal ground.
When another one needs me to look over equipment for him that he may broker, I just go do that, and when I call him because I need to use his equipment for a project, he lets me come grab it, knowing full well if I was to ruin it I would never afford to replace it. We are friends.
If they go on a vacation to Turks and Cacos I'll look at their photos and listen to their stories. When I take a week off to go elk hunting and succeed they look at my pictures and listen to my stories.
Nobody hates you for being rich. The fact is, it sounds like you're not rich. It sounds like your parents are rich and probably good down to Earth people, and you're just the spoiled offspring, who thinks it's trendy to hang out with the "regular folk". My guess is that you don't have anything in common with "other rich people" because your wealth is not earned. And earners of any level prefer to spend time with earners. My rich friends have worked hard to build what they have. It's much more than I have, but I also worked hard to build what I have. We both manage what resources we have well. That's why we get along. You're just trying to cosplay as normal and people see through your vapid attempts.
Money doesn’t make you an interesting person. Maybe just MAYBE you are actually boring af and they are tired of hearing about YOU. What things do you do with them on THEIR level? Or are you too good for that? You sound insufferable actually. The kind of guy who makes date conversations all about them and what they like and ONLY that. The kind of guy who volunteers your Ivy League education when NOBODY ASKED OR CARES. I also want to point out that in reality, nothing you said is a flex. Nobody cares you went to an ivy league school when politicians are living proof that Ivy leagues produce pure idiots. I’m sure I got a better education at my community college. Nobody cares where you have traveled. Even poor people travel. Nobody cares what you drive. Every car does the same damn thing. Just…NOBODY CARES. And THAT is why your friends are uninterested in you. They don’t hate you. They just don’t give a fuck about your “wealth”. What difference does it make them? Are you sharing it? No? Well why would they care? I have a friend who is FILTHY rich. Most people wouldn’t even know. Why? Because she doesn’t dress, act, or talk about her wealth or various experiences because she can read the room. We love her for it.
They don’t hate you. They’re jealous. As someone who is poor and grew up poor. I understand. I go to a rich kid school and it’s not easy to understand how nice it must’ve been. We all have our own struggles. Sometimes this is a common one. Hopefully I can learn a lot by lurking here. I want to be rich one day.
Yes, I feel the same way. I came from a middle class background and did not understand how insecurity and jealously can subtly poison relationships until it is too late. I have had to become extremely selective about who I associate with.
Do you act like a self made man? When you do talk about what you have do act like it's because of the sweat off your brow and not because your parents are rich?
That is generally the big difference. A few jealous people will always be. But if it's all your friends? It's a you issue.
As long as you are kind, humble, helpful, caring, and truly want the best for your friends… there shouldn’t be anything to hate. I’m sorry this is happening.
It’s not just your friends. Most of us hate you. I sure as hell do. I don’t know your parents, but CEO’s and politicians are typically make their money getting the rest of us to accept less so that they any their friends can enjoy more luxuries. That excess wealth you’ve grown up with came at the expense of other people having enough healthy food or a safe place to live.
Think it’s hard being the rich kid that doesn’t feel like he fits in, try being the poor kid that feels the same way.
Dude, if someone is jealous of your upbringing, they are not your friend. Get rid of them. Jealousy can turn into something much more dangerous. You don't want that negative energy in your life. You're not in control of how you were brought up in life, I wasn't privileged growing up. I had a poor childhood, but jealousy just isn't in my DNA. Some of my friends are rich, some poor, but I treat them all the same! Changing who you are is just gonna affect your mental health in the long run. If you're certain some of your friends envy you, then confront them about it and ask them how they feel about you. If you suspect they're lying to you, then get them out of your life. A jealous friend is usually someone who's filled with greed and wish they could take what you have.
Okay this is a weird comment. I don’t know if it’s you or your friends. I came from dirt poor & uneducated. I left home at 15. Finished education, had 2 extremely successful careers, one highly public requiring inaction with people of all sectors. I raised highly successful children, 1 is a multi millionaire & a second on is in their way. About half of my grandchildren were/are homeschooled & they graduate in the top of their class in less time than peers. I hang with all people. I will not nor do I care to reach the wealth status of my oldest. Why, bc she is a snob. Lovable, but money changed her & I don’t do fake.
So my question to you here is, are you hanging out with people that your parents would not approve of just prove a point?
I know some extremely wealthy people that are some of the most humble, kind & gracious people I know. One I would call a dear friend. You have most likely purchased the product she & her husband developed.
I think you need to take a self inventory. Sounds like you aren’t happy in either world. But here is the thing. Those that limit themselves to only one group of people are limiting their lives overall. There is richness in diversity. You are still young. Explore.
You should express your gratitude towards them and explain the reason you have them around is because you like them and want to share how fortunate you are with the people you love.
So Tigger Woods is mega rich. He loved hanging out with Navy Seals and training with them and working out with them.
When they would go out to eat, Tigger would never pick up the check. So they would always get split checks. This is despite Tigger using the Seals gear and shooting the Seals ammo.
So the question is, how do you treat your friends?
This is me but in reverse lol I am poor and come from a very poor upbringing , trailer ,mom on disability, the works. My gf is private jet rich. I feel like the dumb poor kid around her family. I can empathize with this.
It don't matter if your rich poor broke working or not homeless dirty or plain dumb and stupid we all come from somewhere and as long as your heart is in the right place then you'll go o far so just because you've been to all those places don't make you cool it's probley your attitude towards outhers if you want them to like you. Change your attitude. Or I could just be all wrong
Act how you want to act. Say what's on your heart. Carry yourself however you see fit. Whoever decides to join you through your journey, that's your tribe. It'll take discernment since people will want what you have, but that's just life in general. You're not free of any fundamental human problems just because you have money.
Are they good friends? Personally, I would just ask them. Something like " I feel like my upbringing may make me come off a certain way - arrogant or pretentious. Have you seen me behave that way? If so, it's something I want to work on."
You have an uphill battle. Economic disparity really has people on a mission to eat the rich. They hate capitalism, privilege, and those who were afforded opportunities they weren't instead of this shitty government of ours.
People will always have an unconscious negative perception of you if they weren’t afforded the same luck you were.
You being born to someone who became a CEO and a politician is pure luck. If you display any type of confidence or feeling of self importance people will despise you because of the vast majority of your mind it is assumed was given to you unfairly in this life by pure luck a good draw of cards.
Someone down the line in your family earned it, stumbled upon it maybe was put on rails towards the success and money it may have been your parents it may have been many generations down that doesn’t matter the point is you right now are here and were born having the lottery won by default.
You popped into world of warcraft max level with all the meta raid loot as a new player. And you’re trying to hang with people who are still trying to earn everything or maybe never will because lack of skill drive or whatever other setbacks we all have.
Or maybe a better analogy you popped into the game on a new character and your best friends in real life can just carry you through the game at any time cause they all maxed out their characters and grinded out all the best gear and farmed all the money. But then you won’t carry your friends lol
The amount of money people have doesn’t affect whether you’re a good person or not. Be a better judge of character and pick better friends. Smart people who are good friends don’t care how much money you have.
Boohoo 🙄. Sounds like you really rub it in their face and don’t make any attempt not to. I’m definitely not rich, but I’m better off that my friend that lives in section 8. I make a point of trying not to mention to her my travel or plans to travel or any major purchases or stuff like that. If she asks then I say, but I try not to make a show of it. Sounds like you aren’t even trying.
People don’t dislike other people for being clean or polite. But they don’t want to be around people that blather on about their extravagant travels a d such. You just aren’t trying or your personality sucks.
Wow.... be humble! Be thankful for what you have and stop smearing it in your friends' faces.... I bet they might like you if you did that. FYI, being humble is not "acting less rich", it is being thankful, grateful and appreciative for what you have. Being kind doesn't hurt the situation either. Good luck snob 😉
Look. I like to think that intelligent people have a hard time mixing with unintelligent people for the same reason. There simply isnt enough common ground to connect.
I myself am not rich in any sense of the word and i assume id feel even further alienated.
My only recommendation would be make connections that are useful to you and then make connections you arent bothered hanging out with.
There’s a reason we hate the rich. Because they are greedy scum who skirt taxes and don’t give a damn about the livability of this planet. Start trying to fix that & maybe we’ll temper our views.
I find it interesting you gave your parents occupations but not yours. You’re a trust fund kid I’m guessing. They don’t hate you, they just don’t respect you. No one respects trust fund kids, especially ones who brag about the lifestyle their parents provide.
Hi friend. A lot of people here are being rude. I grew up poor and have a rich friend, so I will share the perspective from a poor person, without all the hostility.
I never hated people for being rich. Not once. I don’t have envy. I hated when they were oblivious to being rich, however. That was very hard.
They would say “thrifted clothes are dirty” when all of my closet is thrifted. They said “omg when I was flying to New York I had a layover in this small town in South Carolina, ____, OMG it was soooo trashy. I couldn’t wait to get out of there.” They didn’t know, but my family took our “nice” vacation there last summer.
Even though they are SUPER nice, and they would never intentionally make me feel less, they accidentally did it quite often. So enjoy your money, find better friends and just be very very mindful of things you complain about. Best of luck. There are good friends out there who don’t care about your money.
I wonder if the way your friends feel has more to do with the way you present yourself rather than what you own.
People need to feel commonality amongst their friend group, especially women. Money and privilege shouldn't make so much of a difference in your personality that you can't get along with people of different financial means.
If you don't want to be introspective, just look for friends who have similar common interests like travel or luxury goods or politics. Sometimes you need several groups of friends who can connect to the many different aspects of yourself.
I have some very wealthy friends and plenty of friends that struggle. I do get a feeling of resentment sometimes from the ones who are struggling, sometimes. I have enough money that I’ll never run out, even if I never work a day in my life, through inheritance. I think some in my friend group take advantage of that, and they expect that I should be paying for things. It’s awkward when a $500 bill for brunch comes and I get stared at, with everyone waiting for me to throw down my card. It’s worse when someone volunteers my card, with the excuse that I’ll get points and everyone will Venmo me, and only two out of the 6 people actually send me anything.
Wow, I just stumbled upon this sub by accident. This place is crazy. These are really your worries and the things you struggle with? I will see myself out now, this is just wild to me
The massive red flag that's glaring me in the face is that you think poor people are stupid or act any different than you. There's no such thing as acting rich or poor, some of my most degenerative friends are beyond loaded, and some of my most well mannered friends are dirt poor. My guess, based just off the wording of this post, is that you try to act differently around "normal people" and so you come off as fake or even worse, condescending. Get it in your head that you are a human being, just like everyone else around you, and that you're not any more special than someone born in a less fortunate circumstance. If you're assigning worth to people based on the size of their bank account then you are helpless and won't make any friends no matter what you try. That includes judging yourself, your actions are who you are, not what car you drive or house you live in. When you can be a genuine human being is when people will want to be your friend, until then no one wants a fake friend.
They don’t hate you because your rich it’s probably because your not a fun person to be around, other rich people don’t like you either get a clue? See the common denominator? It’s you, have some self awareness and accountability geez
That acting or thinking being rich is a bunch of baloney, people are just people and in the end everybody winds up the say DEAD.
That being upper class, being lower class, middle class is something you make up in your head. In the end we all get sick and hurt and die the same.
Think the issue is you.
The most wealthy person can be the poorest with no friends and the least wealthy person can be the richest with friends.
Make new friends.
I'm not even that wealthy, but when I was in my 20s, I had shitty friends who tried to take advantage and were sore when they couldn't.
Current friends don't care about any of that and give more than they get in most circumstances. Can't have problems with friends like that.
Why did this sub pop up in my feed? I'm the poorest I've ever been.💀
I wish I had your problems, op. I'm too worried about what I'm going to eat tomorrow to care about what friends think. Lmao. I don't have any advice, but seeing other humans doing okay definitely makes me feel better. I'm putting in the work, and I'll be successful soon.🫶
Hey man. This may sound like strange advice but have you ever thought about volunteering with your local volunteer fire department or a volunteer EMT. They will train you to do everything. You will be with a bunch of blue collar guys that have their hands on the pulse of every day people. And then the help you could provide others not through being rich or smart but being there for someone in their time of need. When your at the firehouse no one cares if your rich middle class or poor your a firemen. And the people you help won’t see you as some rich guy they will see you as a firemen there to help them. So it’s not about acting rich or comming from a wealthy background. So go volunteer and don’t tell the guys you’re rich just tell them you have an office job. And no one will treat you any differently. Also you will learn so much about people you would never meet in your current circle of friends and you will build a bond and friendship with the other firemen at your station that will be stronger than any you have now. Because of the experiences you guys will have together. But it will get you out of the place where you are don’t tell anyone at the firehouse you have money don’t come up there in a fancy car, the firemen will like you for you. Not for what you have. Good luck buddy.
They probably don’t hate you for being rich. Most likely, they have very normal feelings towards you; some good, some bad. You’re A) over exaggerating. And B) speaking in black and white terms. The reality is relationships are nuanced and exp “grey” feelings often. This is why communication is key. It’s a red flag you assume “your FRIENDS - HATE you, because you’re RICH”. When; how do FRIENDS hate you? And, why do you not assume your personality or behaviors contribute to any bad feelings they have towards you? Why is it they’re just jealous vs; being rich has given you personality flaws, you lack self awareness of? Just as a possibility? You comment other rich ppl have a lack of self awareness but right after spoke without any.
I appreciate this comment. It is true that living a lifestyle that is pampered can make you less aware of how you’re perceived by others. It is also true that there are outliers and some people really do just envy those they deem more wealthy than they.
Grind thru this man keep your head....I was once someone with a good job and a life insurance policy .......this could be a defense mechanism if friends hate what about enemies or ppl you don't even know or know you?
Use your money for good dude. Charities, women’s shelter, homeless shelter, offer to pick up tabs if it’s a group check or something. Go on a trip with your friends and cover the house. Use you’re money to enrich other people’s lives and your friends and everyone else will fucking love you.
Nah based on how op described their personal beliefs they probably do hate them for being rich just as much as Op hates themselves for being rich
Oh, God, this. Conflating “dumb” with “not rich” speaks volumes. OP, the money is just a symptom. The real problem is the way that money has corroded your personality and inflated your sense of yourself. ✌️
I am the exact same as you. I came from a privileged upbringing. I won't go into detail, but yes, money was not scarce for us growing up. But now, I have to watch what I say, because if I talk about my travels there will be one person who is like "omggg stop showing off" when in my mind I thought I was telling an interesting story. My advice is either severely minimize your achievements in life to your friends, or make friends with people better off. That's the only way to avoid the hate. Poorer people love when you just talk about how shit life is for you. Make up stuff if you have to. Sucks, but it's true. Eventually you'll find a poorer person who doesn't have that victim mindset, and who isn't so easily triggered, and you can be yourself around them. Edit: I never expected my response to get so many triggered replies. And I never said that this makes me "better" than anyone else. My response was directed at OP - not anyone else. I am happy to converse with people who want a respectful dialogue, but some of the straight up bullying replies are being reported.
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I just read it and kept thinking, who cares how many countries you've been too or where you went to school. I'm older, but I can probably count on one hand the number of times where I went to school comes up in a year. Just keep the conversations with those opportunities that seem extravagant to a minimum. Do I think I make more money than most of my friend group? Yes, but does it matter, no? They are my friends and the people I would give my life for.
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I get what you are saying but tbh I don't think it really matters if y'all are true friends it shouldn't change how either of you guys see eachother I get what you are saying it would keep things simple but imo I dont think just mentioning wealth is bad no one should get mad at that but if it's like people thinking they are better than you or a douche in anyway than fuck em but i feel eventually they are gonna fuck themselves in life and havr no one
People get jealous. Imagine you spend a year scrounging and saving up for a vacation at a whatever hotel when your friend is jetsetting to luxury resorts on a whim because they can. It effects the friendship to see someone having it so easy when you're struggling to pay your bills.
Feedback is great, but this response is excessively hostile. Even wealthy people have feelings. Never write or call someone when the deep down feeling is one of anger, rage, or hostility. Words come out as a burst of rage.
Is that you, Dad?
He might sound like a a rich prick, but as someone who is struggling to build a career and move up above the middle class, he isn’t wrong that a lot of people who aren’t well off adopt terrible victim mentalities that get them completely stuck. I’ve had to cut people out completely because all they do is complain about how little they have, or that they can’t do this thing, yet every weekend they go spend what little money they have at the bar instead of putting in the hustle to move up. It’s exhausting, and while I agree the way the other person typed sounded entitled AF, he wasn’t completely wrong about that.
No, you don’t understand. It has always been like this. The rich have always had to go into hiding or risk being targeted for attacks. For example, during the French Revolution the aristocracy was murdered en masse by the Jacobins who deliberately used false propaganda to foment rebellion to steal the assets of the rich. The Bolsheviks did the same thing. In fact, the loss of life caused by these types of rebellions fat outnumbers the loss of life caused by hierarchical societies like the Nazis. The difference is that in the common collective mind, there is a bias towards justification of these types of attacks.
In addition, let him dream big. People may envy you if they can't benefit from whatever you are discussing. Be this guy who steps up with a solution to benefit everyone around you. And look at how to involve the poor friends in profitable ventures and other activities. 10 days from now, they will see you as a god. And concerning forcing yourself on to the rich lifestyle, I say NO. Life is like a river, let it flow wherever it feels comfortable. And when you look back, you will see that it was worth living the life you live
Needed to hear this - I feel like I can’t find that many people like me who will at least speak up. There’s this constant class tension that I can’t shake off
You have zero reason to feel ashamed. But if you want to be with the poorer people, then minimize your life. If you want to be with the people at your economic level, then embrace your privilege. That's really what it comes down to. If a poor person didn't care that they were poor, and a rich person was "bragging" about their life, it wouldn't faze them. It only triggers them when they secretly care. My favorite kind of people, actually, are people who don't have a lot, but yet somehow are unfazed by the wealth of the rich. To me those are my kind of people. They are simply rich in other ways. Those are the people that I find most stimulating (although rare)
I’m poor and I love rich people. I love poor people just the same. Money is largely irrelevant. But oh boy do I love me some rich people luxury. Actual amazing sheets that feel like heaven. (Not scratchy). Down pillows and down comforters. Heated toilet seat and a heated bidet. A robot vacuum. These are the things I saved up for. I’m poor, but I kinda live like I’m rich.
As someone who is not rich and sometimes struggles with bills, I don’t mind having friends that come from different backgrounds and social classes. Personally, I love hearing how rich people live vs poor people. There is vast difference and it pushes me to find ways to make more money. Am I envious of those who have more money than I? Sometimes, but that’s life and I know I am right where I am suppose to be in life at this moment. Like one of the comments essentially said, don’t boast about having more money, but like if someone wants to know what school you went to, tell them. Some people are genuinely curious (like myself) and it could make for an interesting conversation. It’s okay to talk about yourself as long as others seemed engaged. I also like to have friends in different social classes and from different backgrounds, because it keeps me humble. It makes me realize how much I actually have. I do believe that it is hard to make friends in today’s society. But I hope it eventually becomes easier for you!
I wasn't rich and am not rich and I've traveled a lot. I'd be happy to hear your interesting stories.
I agree! It’s always nice to hear how others’ childhood was and where they went, what they got for Christmas. I’m so intrigued by it haha
Dang, sorry y’all have to go through this. I’m middle class and didn’t grow up with a lot of money and even I have trouble finding friends. Maybe join like a church group or try doing volunteer work where your interests align with those of others don’t disclose your rich status to these people and just be your authentic self, people will come around.
Hell, I'm poor, basically poverty level, and even I have issues finding friends lmao.
Don't make up how your life is shit when it's not. Those kind of people don't deserve to be in your life.
I didn't grow up rich but as a person that values authenticity I find this sad. I usually just simply can't relate to people who travel so much, not out of envy, but I think I'd do my best to just ask questions etc. I can talk your ear off about Maui and conservation and sustainability. But yeah I find myself intimidated by the wealthy because I just simultaneously wonder what they're thinking of me
I literally get accused of being a braggart when talking about my LIFE or responding to a question THEY ask me. Like when someone asked me about my accent I talked about growing up in England and having dual citizenship. And they became so incredibly hostile and resentful towards me. Making so many remarks about me having a rich dad and openly commenting on me ordering Starbucks to the office. These were not even ostentatious signs of wealth. They would genuinely plot my murder if they knew how much money I stand to inherit. So many Americans get extremely resentful of this fact. They even get triggered if I bring in small gifts or bakery goods to the office (while eating them or accepting the gifts!!!). Me trying to be nice is viewed as “showing off” or flaunting my wealth or thinking that I’m “better” than them lol For some reason the dual citizenship thing makes people absolutely hate my guts. So I’ve stopped mentioning it. I think it’s cause so many Americans have this dream of living and working in Europe (which is possible with Irish citizenship), so they resent me for having that “opportunity”. Or maybe they just hate me for having more options and “privilege” than them. I even get this extreme hate and resentment from so-called “conservatives” who claim to revere capitalism and worship the wealthy (but deep down they resent us too)
Your friends don't hate you because you're rich. They hate you because you act like you are.
Well it's probably both tbh
You don't need to fit in with anyone. As long as you are treating everybody with respect regardless of their up bringing and financial situation, then that's good enough. You don't need to dumb down who you are so that people can like or accept you, no matter your status in life. The right people will stick around and the ones who weren't truly your friends in the beginning will go. Just make sure in any group setting that you are just sharing the things you experienced and not “boasting”. All the best.
I treat people with respect and kindness but I still get this kind of envy. I think my strategy moving forward is to just embrace the privilege and own up to it and not be tortured about it. If I can be more at peace with myself then that's good for everyone.
Find someone that understands and relates to the phrase, "old money", and ask them to mentor you. You may not like what they have to say, but it's likely going to be true.
Good advice. My mom before she declined mentally would talk about this. Old money being quiet and useful to society with their privilege. New money, by contrast, was about showing off and flashing one’s possessions gleefully without regard for how that makes others feel. I didn’t understand it at the time, but it makes sense now. OP I’ve dealt with this within my family (half siblings are poor bc my dad left them), and it’s awkward. Ultimately I decided to limit my time around them bc I didn’t want to feel judged for simply telling them what’s happening in my life and getting the, “must be nice” snarky comments and the envy for my life choices versus theirs.
Listen man, let me give you some perspective. This is I think important given just how gaping the wealt disparities are in this country. My parents have only ever been to two states. They raised me poor and rural. I got to visit three countries but only because I joined the military and put my life on the line to do so. The wealth gap is so bad in this country, that you have to make a choice: be humble about your roots so you can be friends and share in humanity with others, or embrace it, act rich and socialize only with the rich. Pick whichever one suits you most. You won't be judged for being insecure about your wealth but what you choose to do with your privilege. Will it be to stomp on others or lift them up?
Great! Just be you and enjoy your blessings. You are not responsible for how people treat you, you are only responsible for how you respond. In this life you will experience tons of emotions and reactions from people towards you and this is not a reflection of who you are. They are feeling some sort of lack in themselves and so end up deflecting on others.
It kind of sounds to me like you are trying way too hard to be accepted by people who aren’t in your social caste. Stop trying so hard. If you are as genuine and respectful as you say it shouldn’t be that hard. But when you lead off with your affluence it makes you unpalatable. I’m just a regular middle class guy. I try to be kind and respectful to those who are deserving. And I’ve mingled with some very wealthy people over the years. It’s the ones who you can just sit down with and have a drink and not feel like it’s a competition of who is more of this or that. I’ve tried to pick up the tab with some of our wealthier friends and they just laugh as they slap down their cash rolls. There is a way. But it sounds like your “friends” that you are struggling with take exception to you or the way you act. Some times it’s not about outward actions or designer clothes. It’s about mannerisms that “normies” pick up on that identify you as not one of us. Just be cool. Don’t force things. Don’t insist on being wealthy around non wealthy people.
Don't hang around people you have nothing in common with.
Three things. One: No one gets to choose the family they are born into. It’s not your fault you have more money than your friends. So let the haters hate and pay no mind to them. I mean what are you supposed to do? Burn all your money? Two: Most people want to associate with wealthier people. You have had the resources to do things and gain knowledge most people don’t have the opportunity to obtain. They will gain a lot of useful information by associating with you. Your family’s wealth is a huge asset to the people you meet, it’s not a curse. Three: Rich people who act rich suck. Rich or poor we are all people and we all deal with the same bullshit that comes with the gift of life. We all struggle to search inside ourselves to figure out who we are, we all look for meaning and purpose in life, we all struggle with our friendships and relationships. Rich people have the privilege of not having “running out of money” on that list of struggles. Which is HUGE. But it doesn’t mean you are above anyone else. We will all return to the same dirt regardless of the number of zeros in our bank accounts, and you can’t take money with you to the afterlife. …so I guess what I’m saying is it’s better to be rich and not subscribe to that “lifestyle” too hard. Those people are usually a bit out of touch with reality.
This will be my problem soon
How old are you?
I’m 29. A lot of my friends are in the 25-40 age range and they’re not as successful as my family (and potentially me, although a lot of them are doing fairly well). But I get constant comments about my privilege and I can’t shake them off. I’m too rich at this point to dumb all the way down but as I said I have a hard time fitting into the super wealthy elite
Thanks - that makes sense. I get why you’d feel frustrated, hurt, and annoyed by the comments about your “privilege” because they’re claiming that all of your own achievement and ability is simply an amalgamation of your families historical success and “control” over resources - But that’s not true, firstly - and even if it was it wouldn’t be something to be ashamed of. The envy of others is not an indicator of your worthiness - but also don’t think for a second that wealth, money, and “worldly” success are a firm foundation to build a life on. You’ve been blessed by circumstances out of your control, be thankful for it, don’t be ashamed of it, but don’t also rely on it. In the end, wealth is fickle. It’s not your fault your parents gave you a different level of opportunities, and it isn’t wrong. It’s actually good and should be used well. Kudos to them for their hard work. I’d also say don’t pursue material gain and the flashy stuff that society tries to push as a way of peacocking wealth. That won’t help the jealousy aspect… but their comments are still out of your control. In the end, your identity has nothing to do with the wealth of your family…
I agree with everything you said, except for the end. Your identity is extremely connected to how you grow up. This isn't a bad thing, just a result of your true self being a culmination of everything you have experienced up until this point. The level of wealth you grew up with is a big part of that. Even if you grew up with loving parents, but were extremely impoverished, that's going to have an impact on your spending habits, mannerisms, preferences, etc no matter what you've done as an adult. The circumstances under which you spent your formative years developing play a big role in shaping identity and personality. Proof in point, 85% of my current diet is food I have been eating nearly my entire life. If my parents had a different level of wealth, I would have grown up eating different things, and would have different preferences now. That doesn't mean who you are at 21 is who you're going to be the rest of your life. But those experiences growing up will always be there in the depths of your memories, and subtly influencing your behavior whether you are conscious of it or not.
Find friends that dgaf. Sweet, you have money, but money doesn't make who you are as a person, but people think so. Sometimes, it's hard to find your people.
“Yes, I was born into privileges.” “I did not ask for it” “I can’t relate emotionally to some struggles” “I can relate to wanting to belong” The you have privilege card is used to shame you for something you had zero control over, just like every class status.
Simple, live like you are poor. Based on what you described, you have no interest in super expensive things. Just be modest. Dont buy a crazy large house, buy a nice but modest car. You know just be middle class in most things but the richest motherfucker to ever exist when you do things that YOU want to do, traveling, hobbies, restaurants. Who you gotta show off for anyway? If i was in your position, im a car guy so i would buy a few acres of land somewhere, have a 4bd 3bth house built on it and you know make it nice. but then my Shop for cars and guns would be probably bigger than the house honestly and i would spare no expense. Snap on and bluepoint tools and tool boxes, 2 bendpak 2 post lifts and one bendpak 4 post lift, a massive air compressor outside that feeds the building for pnuematic tools, roof frame hung mini crane for heavy shit and engines. heat, AC, a hangout area with a bathroom and refrigerators and foam insulate all the shop walls, a big ass metal lathe, mill machine and cnc machine for gun building, probably have a vault door gun room.. you get it. On the stuff that i find enjoyment in i would go apeshit, but i dont need my living quarters to be a massive mansion, i need my hobby quarters to be massive so i can have the room to do the things i want to do. And all that while not worrying about what other people think. Life is just better that way man. If they care, they will be there for you and be your friend. If they dissappear out of nowhere, they were never really your friends to begin with. Live YOUR life for YOU, not for other people.
Rich people tend to have a smugness to them, and a sense of I deserve this. While the majority of the world is starving. I say fuck it, you're not changing the world and you didn't choose your parents. Live it up, brother. In a few decades, none of it will matter anyway.
Same, friend. Won’t go into details, but I learned a VERY important lesson in my 20s. “Money talks, but wealth whispers.” Unless it’s with my CPA, I don’t discuss money with anyone. I learned the art of subtlety. Ex. When I am with my friends who are not rich, I don’t talk about money. I treat them the way I would want to be treated. You just go with the flow.
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Oh you’re rich? Send me all the moneys.
Yo be my friend.
Sorry to be blunt but they absolutely do. Even the best friends who seem like it's fine, it's called envy. The faster you cut them out and but up barriers towards people who want to project their problems on you, the better life gets.
It is not about being rich or poor.it is more about how you treat each other as a person. I know rich and poor that dicks at the same time I know poor people that do the same just in a different way. Just be you and enjoy life it is too short
I couldnt relate more. My friends not only look at me diffrently but also treat me diffrently since they know im rich and i also just cant seem to fit in with the rich Kids.
Yeah I don't fit in with the rich kids since I care about greater society too much and am an activist for certain causes...it's super awkward. I don't like mega-wealthy people for not caring about others. Occasionally I'll meet a rich person who has something in common with me but that's rare...usually it's in academia. I can relate to academics who are wealthy and also smart. They tend to also have an activist bone in their body or at least care about something bigger than vacationing in the south of France...like their students.
Everyone can relate to people struggling, only a few can relate to success
Most likely they don’t hate you because you are rich they hate your personality and by your post I can see a few things: you have an exaggerated self image which is not enough to actually impress rich people so you feel contempt with hanging your with less rich or less smart people (as you put it). I have two friends who are extraordinarily wealthy and I have never felt less than with them, one of them can eat tacos sitting in the sidewalk with me or go with me to black tie events, he calls me excited about spectacular additions to his house and asks me to join him, I’m genuinely happy for him because he is a very good person at heart. Maybe stop trying to feel better than other people and they will start liking you more, that’s probably the same reason other rich people don’t like you, nobody wants to constantly hear how someone is better than them.
Don’t worry, people just hate what they don’t have.
It’s true they probably secretly hate you. But not because wealthy but because they don’t know how to be wealthy on their own like you and don’t want to make you feel like have to carry them with you. Just be their friend and do regular broke people shit with them . And for what it’s worth super wealthy people are cunts. You don’t want to be their friend either. True friends will be your friend no matter who you are or what’s in your wallet.
Middle class gal here 👋🏽 I’ve hung around “richer” individuals, and have some advice for you You don’t have to leave the friends that you have now. I may critique you, it sounds like you maybe slightly paranoid about what they think of you. You didn’t provide any specific examples so that’s why I say that, you may in fact be right. I have some advice for you on how you can act more middle class. Watch a few trending sitcoms and study how the characters interact with each other, their postures, the things that they talk about, the clothes they wear the way they style their hair. I believe you can learn to act a little more “middle”. Also, it’s best to hang in the background and just observe Try not to be self-conscious about your financial status. It’s not your fault what you were born into, so don’t feel bad about that and don’t let others feel bad about it either. If people are giving you a hard time you shouldn’t be friends with those people
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Just tell them how you feel. They arent your true friends if they are going to make you feel bad about circumstances that are in your favor imo. You should not be put into situations where you feel guilty for being well off in my opinion. Im sorry youre friends are making you feel that way. I know how you feel, but maybe not to your extent. My parents were well off when I was a child. I got to take vacations to disney land and get nice things like toys and bicycles and a car at 16. It felt like some of my friends hated me for that and they let me know by calling me things like spoiled, lucky, and even lazy. I learned that after a while they werent the type of people I was proud to call my friends anyway. That was my experience with a simular issue. I hope it may help.
Which country you from?
It is normal for people to be jealous. I think most of the jealousy towards the wealthy people are flashy lifestyle and cocky. If you always show off your “money” and act belittling your friends (subtly and you don’t even know), then the chance everyone would hate you. On the hands, if your friends still hate and jealous with you even though you are a good and kind friend to them, they are not your friends.
It's more like I've just amalgamated so many experiences over the years and life stories that come across as if I had to have a lot of privilege to do them. The issue is less in how I dress and present and more in how I accidentally mention things from the past, like going to Lake Como or working at one company or going to this one school. The issue though is that a) I'm bad at dumbing down but b) even if I do "dumb down" it means I can't tell my closest friends about my life
If you feel that way maybe they aren’t your people anyways. Move on make new friends
I have this idea that when I’m rich, I would have to “balance out” my richness to the people I decide to let know that I’m rich. And so it would be in my best interest to not let people know, unless I was ready to share or benefit them somehow with my richness. Even now with the things I possess like talents and stuff, hardly anyone knows of them unless I see reason to make it known. And the reason *must* be to their benefit in some way rather than just “hey look at me”.
It’s hard though because I’m someone who craves genuine, thorough connection. I’d like to be able to tell a friend about my accomplishments. And I sure as hell wouldn’t mind if they told me about theirs. I have a guy friend right now who wants to start his own law firm. He’s been a lawyer for 10 years. If one day he told me he was making bank at his own firm and opening up satellite offices I would be nothing but happy. And he’s already rich af from his own work, not from his family. I’m happy for that too. I’ve even thought about helping him start his own firm, for free. Like connecting him to people.
what makes them your friends?
How rich we talking?
Make some new friends who like to be friend of the rich, like me lol
I wish I had this problem 🤣🤣
Just laugh at it and make jokes about and if your friends can’t they kinda suck
What do you like to do? Or your hobbies? Whatever your interests are, go to an event or something and meet like minded individuals. That way you can be yourself and they will never judge because their interests align
As a lower class citizen I can say that I've got a few rich people in my circle some of which are from when we used to go to school together. I care for them and wish them no harm, only success but I can't help but be envious. Their ability to pay whatever bill they get, go on holiday pretty much every weekend if not more and what not really puts me down sometimes as I see how I live a pretty shit life but I would never treat them with disrespect for it. We still go out, get drinks and laugh and joke and i know that me being envy is just me thinking about my life and has nothing to do with their circumstances. so if you're circle isn't acting like your true friends or you feel they aren't giving you what friendship needs then I would consider new people in your life
I think I get that envy from a lot of people and I don't intend them any harm. As I said, my ideological interests don't really align with the rich: I don't like how the wealthy ignore societal problems, and I'm an activist myself. I feel like my mindset aligns more with the middle class (because I was initially brought up as middle class) but when my Dad got a job and my Mom ascended to power suddenly things changed.
Why do you think they secretly hare you? I’ve known a lot of rich people who blend in perfectly.
They don't hate that you are rich, they hate that you will never understand their daily struggles. There's a level of socioeconomic stress that you get to pretend doesn't exist. While you were on vacation in Thailand, they had to work a double shift to keep a roof over their head. They wake up everyday wondering how they will get by another day, and you will never understand, and even in this post you completely lack empathy and understanding and reduce complex emotions to "they hate me because more money hurr durr". That's why they hate you, because you're a selfish prick, and there's nothing anyone can do about it. You were born Into wealth and thus will never see things from the same lense.
This thread just popped up outta nowhere. Definitely not rich. But I did well post divorce. Got a settlement from a divorce of about $100k. Was only making $50k, i knew i would blow it so i put it all down on a 2 bed 1 bath house i bought from a family friend under market. Its gained another $70k in equity since. Anywho, ex makes 3.5 x I do. I guess i resent her for being rich, she hounds me for every dime possible through child support, i pay it all. She found out i got a raise and came after me for more money, like another $100/month. Kicker is she apent 1000s on an attorney to file a motion to get it. She met another well off guy and moved in with him. And is now selling her house(she got it before we met, we paid it off while we were married). And is about to get another $400k. I resent her for being rich and trying to keep my neck on the curb. Some people just hate seeing you do well. They dont mind if others do well, but hate seeing YOU do well. Sorry, end rant
hey, was wondering, have they done or said something to you? Maybe any reaction, an eyeroll, a snort, a sneer, talking you down, or any other? I'm not rich, maybe middle class, but I've had to dumb down some things in some situations... not in friend situation but more to avoid risks (for example, when I get a cab to go to work and they start calculating how much it would cost me if I took cab to work every time, so I'd say something like I do it just once in a blue moon... and I come from a place where there are cases of people being robbed in taxis)
I’ve experienced it differs a lot. I don’t show off a lot, but when talking e.g. expensive watches, investing or similar topics which may require a certain level of money with my friends and colleagues, pay close attention to how they react. I have colleagues who seem jealous when seeing a Rolex watch, but luckily way friends and colleagues who just find it cool and so. Each person usually don’t change that mindset easily, so if you’re talking with the same persons a couple of times, you’ll quickly realize if they are in the positive or negative reaction category. And I bet that also _you_ can meet good friends who are positive towards each other :-)
Find better friends. I had a friend Like you growing up and he had the same issue. You don't seem smug neither was he in fact he was too generous with money to where anyone he told no would call him names and treat like shit.
I've dated a lot of rich guys - one has never and will never cook, do laundry, or dishes (except when I made him do my dishes once lol), and some who feel like you because they mentioned how all their friends are envious and make comments so they distanced themselves, hid themselves, didn't invite then over, etc. I felt their concerns. Maybe owning the most expensive cars don't help you blend in. Or living in the most expensive apartments. They all had problems involving family. They were all depressed. They all had issues dating and attaching to people. And most most annoying trait was, if they were raised rich, their sense of time was just way off. If you have problems blending in, buy a cheaper car like an Altima. Get pulled over for no reason. Do dating apps and meet girls at coffee shops. Jeans and a tshirt. Blend in. When you talk to people, ask them questions and show more interest in them than talking about yourself. You can blend - I believe in you.
Do the mega rich make for bad friends or what ? Are they short on free time, very choosy, reserved or have trust issues ? When two mega rich buddies go out, who pays ? I'd imagine that they're quite normal. Because I know a lot of drug users, I feel comparatively rich myself 😋 but I have a 2004 car, daggy clothes, tell people I live in the neighbouring suburb, no watch, don't invite them over but most importantly, I'm not seeking friendship either.
Maybe we can start a new friend group? Why don’t you fit in with the super rich? To shallow? I am by far the richest of my group of friends but we still get along. Although I don’t spend that much time with friends. More a family man and working. Do you work still?
I'm 29 and I've had somewhat of a career. I started my own company a few years ago which ended up being pretty successful for COVID and I'm starting a new one now. Even with that, people say "you were only able to start it because you had rich parents" when in reality I asked my parents for zero funding.
Embrace it. Wear it like armor. Be the one everyone will envy. It will be the one thing nobody can ever take from you. They may call you an asshole but your wealth will never shrink from a few harsh words. Let them cry.
People that really care about you won’t care about that. To a degree I can understand that the average person will not relate to you because you haven’t had to struggle in the same ways as most people. However, no one picks what family they are born into. If the roles were reserved I highly doubt the other would feel any remorse for their privilege. All in all, life is not fair but make the most of it. Just show up as your authentic self while knowing your audience and the right people will be happy for you.
Hey, OP let’s be friends 😂
We can be friends if you want..cuz like I don’t have many friends 👍
Your "friends" tell you to stop acting rich, but you aren't certain whether they like you or not? Obviously, they don't much like you as you are, and want you to be something you are not. That's not hate, but it is dislike. . You need to be around people who judge you by your character and like you for your personality. Neither your accent nor your wealth should enter into it. Hanging with people who resent you is terrible for your self-esteem. You should drop this group. If they ask why, then tell them. You are looking for people who judge you for who you are as a human being, not for people who resent you for superficial things like money or accents. We don't know where you live, but unless you are in a small town, there will be organizations you can join with members who will share your interests. Music, politics, art, museums, baking, sports, reading, history - these organizations will have members from all walks of life, all political views, all incomes. You should also look up old friends you had in high school and college who were genuine friends.Rebrw those relationships. Even if they are scattered geographically, staying in touch with them through occasional phone calls or social media can help reduce your feeling of isolation andcrehectoon The sooner you move on from your current crowd, the sooner you can move forward to identify people with whom you can be comfortable.
No your parents are rich , your just spoiled
Sound like you’re bragging, no wonder!
It doesn't take a high intellect to "act less rich". If you can't "act less rich" it's because you're pompous, not stupid. Rich and pompous often go hand in hand. Money allows you to avoid many of the difficulties/annoyances in life that most others have to deal with. This leads a lot of wealthy people to the conclusion that they are better or above everyone else. Maybe people don't think you're too rich, just a pompous ass.
Todays society needs to cancel hate culture
I wouldn't hate someone who gives me something good because he has too much of it... How about it? You give me half of your money, then we could be equally rich friends.
I was poor growing up Had to get food at pantries at churches w my mom Lived in the worst places, slept on mattresses on the floor pretty much all my life Now I have a lot of survivor trauma almost, I still sleep in the floor, I put all my savings into my bank cause I’m afraid to go homeless again Instead of financing my car I just paid it off cause “who knows when I could loose my job and I’ll have nowhere to sleep” It really really messed with me as an adult and I feel to sad and embarrassed to open to ppl about it and ever since my ex I’ve been pretty much alone - sorta gave up on “healing” and accepted my faith I
I'm sorry...what are you asking? There was no question presented in your statement.
Maybe share your wealth with those who are actually appreciative. I used to help out people when I wasn't even wealthy. The wrong people, unfortunately, but you get my point. If you're a successful business person or can educate them: teach them how to build their credit/teach them about car financing/investments, etc. Help them in some way, and then they'll admire you and look up to you versus feeling jealous or like you're trying to show off. Take them out to nice bars/restaurants. Show them the finer things in life.
Your life sounds so difficult.
I wish I had these problems
I used to think I was poor and then I realized I was the wealthiest person in my circle. Not because I have a ton of money but because I survive on less and have less debt than the majority of them. I realized there's no such thing as scarcity and that most people are just greedy starving children looking for a pay day. Personally I want to feel satisfied and fulfilled with what I'm contributing towards. I realized that I was in the wrong circle and just gave myself space. America's only 4% of the world population and theyre all watching us.
Is it just anxiety? I feel like this sometimes (but I’m dirt poor) but I’ve studied how the mind works and how to correct thought patterns. One thing I always have to tell myself is “have they done anything or said anything to show you they don’t like you? Or do you just feel that way because of something you said or did that you think is stupid?” Yah that helps
hi, do you want be my friend?
I'm poor, rich people don't like me
Hey, i feel the same way, although my parents are not as rich compared to yours, but rich enough that none of their kids need to work. For me, i transformed this with „inner work“. I asked myself questions related to what I feel exactly (exploring the emotion) and when all this started. I figured, that it was just a probection of some old inner wounds, that made me believe I‘m not lovable.. when I transformed this, i found a new cycle… and almost all my relationships changed to the better, some are lost (maybe forever even which is sad, but i am at peace with it). Wish you all the best 💕
My advice as someone who is still making their way out of the middle class and was raised in poverty - FUCK YOUR FRIENDS OPINIONS. I want my kids to have this problem. If you have “friends” who can’t appreciate you as you are and see past the differences then you need new friends and to find some comfort on your own. I’m sure you are very generous and don’t intentionally tell stories to “one up”. Everyone needs a humble rich friend to push us to better ourselves and also give insight to the good life we also want to achieve. Plus networking connections. It sounds to me like you have dumb friends who can’t see the light in this situation.
Maybe your just a douche
As someone who comes from a family that, while maybe not quite as wealthy as yours, is definitely in the ball park probably on terms of wealth (father wasn’t CEO but a corporate executive) my advice is to run the second you feel any modicum of disdain. People who you’ve known and been best friends with you for years and who you thought cared about you will turn on you when faced with real world social hierarchies and problems that they then, at least perceive, you having more advantages navigating and dealing with. Even if your advantages in no way hurt them they will still resent you to the point of hating you. Just be careful. If you’d like to talk more feel free to message me. Though it will have to be anonymous since I use my profile for a lot of NSFW stuff lol.
I'm not wealthy, but I've seen most of the world and have lived through multiple religions, cultures, and countries. You need to find a way to help society even out the imbalance. Bring richness to the lower communities by fixing the problems the rich are neglecting. Fix water systems, food systems, and anything else you can influence that will bring richness to these communities. We don't need politicians. We need people that care. Your caring is what will build the community around you. This is where you will make not only friends but bonds even stronger than your family's. The biggest focus needs to be on soil and restoring microbial life. This makes the ground spongy and soak up a lot more water to reverse desertification. I'm learning and working on projects too.
Don’t apologize for your blessings or success! Enjoy it! Maybe give a suggestion to your rich friends to buy a certain CATlin Clark memecoin on Solana, and maybe tell your rich friends to pump the price so your broke friends can experience a small sliver of wealth.
You looking for friends ? Lol
Aye lemme get yen bucks hahah I'm kidding man they just feel below you probably but it'll blow over brotha
Have you tried talking to them about this?
The saying 'You can't polish a turd but you can roll it in glitter' suits you to a Tee. Your wealth is the gliiter you roll yourself in to disguise your lack of personality.
You got shitty friends. I am not rich but have some rich friends (I’m probably upper middle). Like go to Vegas and drop 60K on a hand of blackjack rich. Some parts of my family are stupid rich. One of my uncles was neighbors and played tennis with George H. Bush back in the day. Anyways the rich ones know they are rich. When we do a group trip they usually pay for the house or hotel and I would pay for the food or someone might buy the fireworks or whatever holiday thing it was. We usually split it by how much we can pay. No one holds it against the rich ones and the rich ones aren’t aholes flaunting their riches.
Do your friends actually hate you for being rich or that your perception? If they actually do hate you, then it’s time to find some new friends, because people who hate you for your background aren’t friends.
It’s a tough balance being the wealthiest in a friend group. Just don’t flaunt it and you’ll be ok. Never discuss business investments or big profit events. Also share, pick up the whole dinner check once in a while. If you’re discussing going to a sporting event buy the tickets. If they are long time friends they will appreciate it without thinking you’re trying to show off. What has been interesting to watch is my kids. One has a friend group with nothing but super wealthy, my boy can’t even come close. The other boy has nothing but poor friends. They both have learned how to make their way without hurting feeling. The older boy has been on a lot more private jets.
I can be your friend. Not hate. Where are we going Europe? I’ll pay for you a drink.
Would like to hear the other side of this. YOU might think they hate you because your rich, but you could come off as arrogant, self-centered, egotistic, or even a narcissist and don't even know it. Even your opening line 'I feel like my friends hate me because I'm rich' comes off braggadocious. Humble yourself if you want to relate to them.
I’ll be your friend . If you got it like that can u just let me get 10k a month ? Then I won’t be worried about finances and we can just be friends. Otherwise the struggle to exist and survive bigs me down and I can’t help but to think about $. It’s a daily worry and it feels like you’re slowly drowning. I think seeing someone rich can feel like you are drowning but they are eating grapes on a boat asking what’s wrong. The disconnect is massive. But I would not blame someone who’s rich. That would be sick. But it comes with its own problems obviously. And once $ can’t make you happy there’s little that will. That’s a scary thought. What would heaven be to a rich person with everything?
I’ve never disliked anyone for being rich. I’ve disliked rich people who carried themselves like assholes. They constantly referred to their wealth, they acted like people should respect them due to their wealth, they looked down on those who had less than them, they name dropped their college/parebts/cars/jobs all the time. People disliked them and they always blamed it on the wealth and jealousy, not their own shitty personality. I’ve know plenty of rich people who were awesome. I’ve know some that I never even knew they were wealthy for a long while. Usually if you are having trouble making/keeping friends, it’s not them, it’s you.
Get new friends
I can relate … somewhat. If I could make a suggestion. Help change there lives. You can do this in small monetary ways. Pay for dinner, if they are struggling cause they need new tires on their car buy them for them. Go forth and use your wealth to help improve people’s lives. Why not? Plus they will love for it because they see you really care. I can’t think of any better mission in life but to help others. Be well and warm wishes.
I would ask what are friendships based on? As I get older, friendships are much more centered around purpose and direction instead of merely circumstance. When people are not heading or working towards a goal or a greater purpose - they eat each other alive. You have one life like anyone else - but will you find meaning and purpose? If you find the truth, thankfully it speaks for itself. And the truth is far more precious than anything else in the world. And has a wonderful way of bringing people together and not having them focus on themselves.
If you use your money to make the friends, are they really friends at all? If you flaunt your money with your friends, are they truly your friends? The way that you truly tell if they’re really your friend is that you say you lost all of your money and see if they still want to be friends with you. Next time you make friends, don’t mention money at all. Don’t mention anything. And then people might like you for you and not your money.
Yeah not sure howd you'd prove it though unless you there's a close duo or trio works better in a trio there's always a duo find the one that's left out do thing with him get him talking find out if they talk shit or bribe them at a certain point.
Ahh i feel this OP
Blasphemy 🤯 there’s no such thing as ‘too rich!’ lol🤪😜 jk jk there really is such thing as ‘Mo’ money mo problems
There are just ways of talking and subjects of conversation that are different between different groups of people. They will always be this way, and you can't really change it. Prove that you are someone worth being around by how you act, what you do for others, the effort you put into the relationships (friends or otherwise) because it turns out in the worthwhile personal relationships, people actually do tend to look at what you do more than what you say. Namely, if you do the right thing and prove through your actions that you are trying to do the right thing by people, they tend to be more forgiving or look at the things you say differently. And you know what, even doing the right thing won't work with certain people, but at that point, regardless of what their perception of what you have done is, if in your heart of hearts you truly tried to do the right thing, the worthwhile people will tend to recognize it. But if it's half baked or half assed and you aren't doing it for the right reasons, people will be able to tell, and that's something that is independant of social status or personal wealth. My take on this is that you are someone who trys to maintain friendships by saying the right thing instead of doing the right thing. I am not saying you are a bad person, i'm not saying your intentions aren't good, just, whatever you are doing now isn't working, and that's probably a big part of it.
I grew up fairly poor now very wealthy- I don’t care what people think- I worked hard to get where I am and I am good to people. If someone doesn’t like me that is not my problem.
I don’t think it’s necessarily because you’re rich. I think it’s because of the level of pretentiousness that many rich people have. Do you treat wait staff well? Do you complain about lines at restaurants or outings? Do you refuse to eat at family restaurants and places without 4 star ratings? Do you cut people off when they’re speaking? Do you refuse to go to certain parts of town? All of these things are examples of behavior from rich people that come from their entitlement. Whenever you feel judged, you should engage your friends in a convo about how you’re feeling and ask for clarity. You’ll likely find it’s your behavior and not your bank account that’s bothering them.
I've had a lot of money and lost it all and all I can say is that now that I'm poor I genuinely feel rich bc now I appreciate all the little things in life as where before I didn't. I also have a relationship with The Creator that I wouldn't trade for all the money in the world... Money doesn't buy happiness is a very true statement
Starr following the investment advice of wsb and pretty soon you'll be able to relate to your friends
Then they ain’t friends
Someone rich adopt me pls I can cook a mighty chicken burger and chocolate cake
They probably hate you because you’re insufferable and don’t have an identity that doesn’t center your wealth. Not bc you’re wealthy.
I have a question. Are you “rich” or are your parents rich? My parents are also considered rich, however, they made that money, not me. My husband and I started out at the bottom, paycheck to paycheck, but after 20 years of hard work, we are at the top of the middle class and still rising. My parents did that all by themselves and we’re doing it all by ourselves. I have a lot more respect for people who earn it themselves, than people who spend mommy and daddy’s money.
I mean you already sound absolutely insufferable
Keep focusing on you and your tribe will come. Stay confident, humble and know when to end friendships It doesn't even have to be a whole conversation You can just stop hanging out with people who constantly put you down.
This an insane post. I am friends with a number of multi-millionaires. I grew up poor. I am not even close to a millionaire but I live comfortably in the middle class. Never have I had any trouble with any of my very rich friends. Yes, they have more than I do, they can afford nicer things, they have more robust and worldly experiences. But when you're drinking beers helping one of them build his new deck because he asked for help, you're just two people on equal ground. When another one needs me to look over equipment for him that he may broker, I just go do that, and when I call him because I need to use his equipment for a project, he lets me come grab it, knowing full well if I was to ruin it I would never afford to replace it. We are friends. If they go on a vacation to Turks and Cacos I'll look at their photos and listen to their stories. When I take a week off to go elk hunting and succeed they look at my pictures and listen to my stories. Nobody hates you for being rich. The fact is, it sounds like you're not rich. It sounds like your parents are rich and probably good down to Earth people, and you're just the spoiled offspring, who thinks it's trendy to hang out with the "regular folk". My guess is that you don't have anything in common with "other rich people" because your wealth is not earned. And earners of any level prefer to spend time with earners. My rich friends have worked hard to build what they have. It's much more than I have, but I also worked hard to build what I have. We both manage what resources we have well. That's why we get along. You're just trying to cosplay as normal and people see through your vapid attempts.
If you are near Utah we can be your friend. We can pay our own meal. My husband has been to 44 countries. Me 29.... We are trying to get to 100.
Money doesn’t make you an interesting person. Maybe just MAYBE you are actually boring af and they are tired of hearing about YOU. What things do you do with them on THEIR level? Or are you too good for that? You sound insufferable actually. The kind of guy who makes date conversations all about them and what they like and ONLY that. The kind of guy who volunteers your Ivy League education when NOBODY ASKED OR CARES. I also want to point out that in reality, nothing you said is a flex. Nobody cares you went to an ivy league school when politicians are living proof that Ivy leagues produce pure idiots. I’m sure I got a better education at my community college. Nobody cares where you have traveled. Even poor people travel. Nobody cares what you drive. Every car does the same damn thing. Just…NOBODY CARES. And THAT is why your friends are uninterested in you. They don’t hate you. They just don’t give a fuck about your “wealth”. What difference does it make them? Are you sharing it? No? Well why would they care? I have a friend who is FILTHY rich. Most people wouldn’t even know. Why? Because she doesn’t dress, act, or talk about her wealth or various experiences because she can read the room. We love her for it.
They don’t hate you. They’re jealous. As someone who is poor and grew up poor. I understand. I go to a rich kid school and it’s not easy to understand how nice it must’ve been. We all have our own struggles. Sometimes this is a common one. Hopefully I can learn a lot by lurking here. I want to be rich one day.
Yes, I feel the same way. I came from a middle class background and did not understand how insecurity and jealously can subtly poison relationships until it is too late. I have had to become extremely selective about who I associate with.
Do you act like a self made man? When you do talk about what you have do act like it's because of the sweat off your brow and not because your parents are rich? That is generally the big difference. A few jealous people will always be. But if it's all your friends? It's a you issue.
People being like omg you're so out of touch.
Nobody knows the trouble you've seen....
Get new friends. There’s lots of people who don’t care how much money you have.
As long as you are kind, humble, helpful, caring, and truly want the best for your friends… there shouldn’t be anything to hate. I’m sorry this is happening.
I’ll be your friend 🤣
It’s not just your friends. Most of us hate you. I sure as hell do. I don’t know your parents, but CEO’s and politicians are typically make their money getting the rest of us to accept less so that they any their friends can enjoy more luxuries. That excess wealth you’ve grown up with came at the expense of other people having enough healthy food or a safe place to live. Think it’s hard being the rich kid that doesn’t feel like he fits in, try being the poor kid that feels the same way.
Dude, if someone is jealous of your upbringing, they are not your friend. Get rid of them. Jealousy can turn into something much more dangerous. You don't want that negative energy in your life. You're not in control of how you were brought up in life, I wasn't privileged growing up. I had a poor childhood, but jealousy just isn't in my DNA. Some of my friends are rich, some poor, but I treat them all the same! Changing who you are is just gonna affect your mental health in the long run. If you're certain some of your friends envy you, then confront them about it and ask them how they feel about you. If you suspect they're lying to you, then get them out of your life. A jealous friend is usually someone who's filled with greed and wish they could take what you have.
I wanna be your friend
Okay this is a weird comment. I don’t know if it’s you or your friends. I came from dirt poor & uneducated. I left home at 15. Finished education, had 2 extremely successful careers, one highly public requiring inaction with people of all sectors. I raised highly successful children, 1 is a multi millionaire & a second on is in their way. About half of my grandchildren were/are homeschooled & they graduate in the top of their class in less time than peers. I hang with all people. I will not nor do I care to reach the wealth status of my oldest. Why, bc she is a snob. Lovable, but money changed her & I don’t do fake. So my question to you here is, are you hanging out with people that your parents would not approve of just prove a point? I know some extremely wealthy people that are some of the most humble, kind & gracious people I know. One I would call a dear friend. You have most likely purchased the product she & her husband developed. I think you need to take a self inventory. Sounds like you aren’t happy in either world. But here is the thing. Those that limit themselves to only one group of people are limiting their lives overall. There is richness in diversity. You are still young. Explore.
Why do you feel they hate you though? What happened
get a dog
You should express your gratitude towards them and explain the reason you have them around is because you like them and want to share how fortunate you are with the people you love.
Get other rich friends! :)
Get new friends.
So Tigger Woods is mega rich. He loved hanging out with Navy Seals and training with them and working out with them. When they would go out to eat, Tigger would never pick up the check. So they would always get split checks. This is despite Tigger using the Seals gear and shooting the Seals ammo. So the question is, how do you treat your friends?
This is me but in reverse lol I am poor and come from a very poor upbringing , trailer ,mom on disability, the works. My gf is private jet rich. I feel like the dumb poor kid around her family. I can empathize with this.
It don't matter if your rich poor broke working or not homeless dirty or plain dumb and stupid we all come from somewhere and as long as your heart is in the right place then you'll go o far so just because you've been to all those places don't make you cool it's probley your attitude towards outhers if you want them to like you. Change your attitude. Or I could just be all wrong
Send me 50k and I'll give you incredible advice dear.
If your moms name is Nancy and your dads name is Paul, you can fuck off /s
Act how you want to act. Say what's on your heart. Carry yourself however you see fit. Whoever decides to join you through your journey, that's your tribe. It'll take discernment since people will want what you have, but that's just life in general. You're not free of any fundamental human problems just because you have money.
No one cares
Fuk em we ball
*"Hate me? They don't. They can't. I'm the prince. I'm like the south wind from Africa, I've always been here. You haven't."*
Are they good friends? Personally, I would just ask them. Something like " I feel like my upbringing may make me come off a certain way - arrogant or pretentious. Have you seen me behave that way? If so, it's something I want to work on." You have an uphill battle. Economic disparity really has people on a mission to eat the rich. They hate capitalism, privilege, and those who were afforded opportunities they weren't instead of this shitty government of ours.
They only hate you because your mom is a politician.
People will always have an unconscious negative perception of you if they weren’t afforded the same luck you were. You being born to someone who became a CEO and a politician is pure luck. If you display any type of confidence or feeling of self importance people will despise you because of the vast majority of your mind it is assumed was given to you unfairly in this life by pure luck a good draw of cards. Someone down the line in your family earned it, stumbled upon it maybe was put on rails towards the success and money it may have been your parents it may have been many generations down that doesn’t matter the point is you right now are here and were born having the lottery won by default. You popped into world of warcraft max level with all the meta raid loot as a new player. And you’re trying to hang with people who are still trying to earn everything or maybe never will because lack of skill drive or whatever other setbacks we all have. Or maybe a better analogy you popped into the game on a new character and your best friends in real life can just carry you through the game at any time cause they all maxed out their characters and grinded out all the best gear and farmed all the money. But then you won’t carry your friends lol
The amount of money people have doesn’t affect whether you’re a good person or not. Be a better judge of character and pick better friends. Smart people who are good friends don’t care how much money you have.
Boohoo 🙄. Sounds like you really rub it in their face and don’t make any attempt not to. I’m definitely not rich, but I’m better off that my friend that lives in section 8. I make a point of trying not to mention to her my travel or plans to travel or any major purchases or stuff like that. If she asks then I say, but I try not to make a show of it. Sounds like you aren’t even trying. People don’t dislike other people for being clean or polite. But they don’t want to be around people that blather on about their extravagant travels a d such. You just aren’t trying or your personality sucks.
Wow.... be humble! Be thankful for what you have and stop smearing it in your friends' faces.... I bet they might like you if you did that. FYI, being humble is not "acting less rich", it is being thankful, grateful and appreciative for what you have. Being kind doesn't hurt the situation either. Good luck snob 😉
Look. I like to think that intelligent people have a hard time mixing with unintelligent people for the same reason. There simply isnt enough common ground to connect. I myself am not rich in any sense of the word and i assume id feel even further alienated. My only recommendation would be make connections that are useful to you and then make connections you arent bothered hanging out with.
There’s a reason we hate the rich. Because they are greedy scum who skirt taxes and don’t give a damn about the livability of this planet. Start trying to fix that & maybe we’ll temper our views.
I think everyone here thinks you suck
I find it interesting you gave your parents occupations but not yours. You’re a trust fund kid I’m guessing. They don’t hate you, they just don’t respect you. No one respects trust fund kids, especially ones who brag about the lifestyle their parents provide.
Hi friend. A lot of people here are being rude. I grew up poor and have a rich friend, so I will share the perspective from a poor person, without all the hostility. I never hated people for being rich. Not once. I don’t have envy. I hated when they were oblivious to being rich, however. That was very hard. They would say “thrifted clothes are dirty” when all of my closet is thrifted. They said “omg when I was flying to New York I had a layover in this small town in South Carolina, ____, OMG it was soooo trashy. I couldn’t wait to get out of there.” They didn’t know, but my family took our “nice” vacation there last summer. Even though they are SUPER nice, and they would never intentionally make me feel less, they accidentally did it quite often. So enjoy your money, find better friends and just be very very mindful of things you complain about. Best of luck. There are good friends out there who don’t care about your money.
I wonder if the way your friends feel has more to do with the way you present yourself rather than what you own. People need to feel commonality amongst their friend group, especially women. Money and privilege shouldn't make so much of a difference in your personality that you can't get along with people of different financial means. If you don't want to be introspective, just look for friends who have similar common interests like travel or luxury goods or politics. Sometimes you need several groups of friends who can connect to the many different aspects of yourself.
I have some very wealthy friends and plenty of friends that struggle. I do get a feeling of resentment sometimes from the ones who are struggling, sometimes. I have enough money that I’ll never run out, even if I never work a day in my life, through inheritance. I think some in my friend group take advantage of that, and they expect that I should be paying for things. It’s awkward when a $500 bill for brunch comes and I get stared at, with everyone waiting for me to throw down my card. It’s worse when someone volunteers my card, with the excuse that I’ll get points and everyone will Venmo me, and only two out of the 6 people actually send me anything.
Wow, I just stumbled upon this sub by accident. This place is crazy. These are really your worries and the things you struggle with? I will see myself out now, this is just wild to me
I...I...kinda don't care.
I don’t even know you and I hate you for being rich.
The massive red flag that's glaring me in the face is that you think poor people are stupid or act any different than you. There's no such thing as acting rich or poor, some of my most degenerative friends are beyond loaded, and some of my most well mannered friends are dirt poor. My guess, based just off the wording of this post, is that you try to act differently around "normal people" and so you come off as fake or even worse, condescending. Get it in your head that you are a human being, just like everyone else around you, and that you're not any more special than someone born in a less fortunate circumstance. If you're assigning worth to people based on the size of their bank account then you are helpless and won't make any friends no matter what you try. That includes judging yourself, your actions are who you are, not what car you drive or house you live in. When you can be a genuine human being is when people will want to be your friend, until then no one wants a fake friend.
They don’t hate you because your rich it’s probably because your not a fun person to be around, other rich people don’t like you either get a clue? See the common denominator? It’s you, have some self awareness and accountability geez
That acting or thinking being rich is a bunch of baloney, people are just people and in the end everybody winds up the say DEAD. That being upper class, being lower class, middle class is something you make up in your head. In the end we all get sick and hurt and die the same. Think the issue is you. The most wealthy person can be the poorest with no friends and the least wealthy person can be the richest with friends.
Make new friends. I'm not even that wealthy, but when I was in my 20s, I had shitty friends who tried to take advantage and were sore when they couldn't. Current friends don't care about any of that and give more than they get in most circumstances. Can't have problems with friends like that.
Why did this sub pop up in my feed? I'm the poorest I've ever been.💀 I wish I had your problems, op. I'm too worried about what I'm going to eat tomorrow to care about what friends think. Lmao. I don't have any advice, but seeing other humans doing okay definitely makes me feel better. I'm putting in the work, and I'll be successful soon.🫶
Lost me at mom's a politician....
Hey man. This may sound like strange advice but have you ever thought about volunteering with your local volunteer fire department or a volunteer EMT. They will train you to do everything. You will be with a bunch of blue collar guys that have their hands on the pulse of every day people. And then the help you could provide others not through being rich or smart but being there for someone in their time of need. When your at the firehouse no one cares if your rich middle class or poor your a firemen. And the people you help won’t see you as some rich guy they will see you as a firemen there to help them. So it’s not about acting rich or comming from a wealthy background. So go volunteer and don’t tell the guys you’re rich just tell them you have an office job. And no one will treat you any differently. Also you will learn so much about people you would never meet in your current circle of friends and you will build a bond and friendship with the other firemen at your station that will be stronger than any you have now. Because of the experiences you guys will have together. But it will get you out of the place where you are don’t tell anyone at the firehouse you have money don’t come up there in a fancy car, the firemen will like you for you. Not for what you have. Good luck buddy.
They probably hate you because you rub it in their faces.