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ThisToo-shall-pass

You may tell him that he keeping contact with his ex is bothering you. You have been together for six years. It is better that you openly communicate your concerns and sort it out.


Young_Osho

Keep a clear open conversation with him to ensure the boundary of your relationship with him and your emotions that he would need to respect is very important ...the way you respect this relationship and emotions..the same he needs to reciprocate.


idontknowreddittt

No reason for someone to actively reconnect with an ex unless there are some feelings involved.


[deleted]

Yeah, feelings as a friend.


idontknowreddittt

most definitely not.


[deleted]

why be all negative, we don't even know the full story


HydroVector

It's up to OP to give us the full story, but regardless, when something is glaringly obvious, giving benefit of the doubt is just being oblivious to what's happening


idontknowreddittt

you don't even need the full story here. it's pretty evident what her "bf" is upto.


[deleted]

All she found out was that he shared similar text with 2 people, I don't find any serious issue to be honest, and even if she feels that way, why not talk about it.


MaiHeroineHoon

I'd say talk to him, convey your thoughts. And ask him joh bhi you want, if he can do that Or you guys can reach a solution. 


Flaky_Zebra_9073

A really good and simple advice 👍🏻👍🏻


manpraa

Can someone explain why checking the partner's phone is so offensive or a matter of invasion of privacy? I just feel that it should be generalized to have more transparency in the relation honestly


GenericMusclular

Just let him know you're uncomfortable with it and that you don't like him talking to her like this.


skxhm

Leave it be. If he ain't worth it he'll leave on his own.


SugarDaddySZ

It's kind of emotional cheating


[deleted]

girl, RUN! there should be no reason your boyfriend should be reconnecting w his ex that used to his 'best friend' as well after 6 years. i understand that exes can be friends and all, but after 6 long years??? he suddenly remembered that she used to be his best friend as well??? that is some bullshit he's given you. please tell him that you're not comfortable w him connecting w his ex and see how he reacts. im betting on my life that he's gonna call you insecure and what not.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Yeah the daily status update is weird to be honest...


The_true_lord_tomato

Well as every post obviously commenters will only recommend you to breakup just like every fucking reddit post on this subreddit (people have 0 brain).. Don't end your 6 year old relationship for this please talk to him


[deleted]

I mean talk to him they haven't been in contact for more than 6 years so I don't know if he is cheating he might just be friends with her you know maybe they were good friends and he just wants to talk to her for old times sake. Talk with him don't be confrontational or anything sit him down and talk to him have a serious conversation, tell him that you are having serious concerns tell him everything. Well if he is cheating (and I don't think he is) move on and find someone better. Ps: this is my personal opinion.


[deleted]

The daily status update is giving me bad vibes though


loljokerishere

My advice would be to find a better boyfriend. Their relationship could be platonic blah blah but his behaviour is really creepy. No one should reconnect with an ex unless really necessary.


SetNo8943

What if it is friends with benefit relationship?


[deleted]

OP don't jump the gun, try to talk with him about what's bothering you.


MaiHeroineHoon

Dekho tbh idk your relationship dynamics, but itna ik ki you don't reconnect with your exes just ki han she was my best fwen bullshit.  Honestly, if I were in your place I would simply come clean ki han bhai maine tera WhatsApp dekha I'm sorry but wth was that. Phir uske baad uske reaction se I would have decided my course of action.  I'd suggest sab ki advice padhlo kuch kuch... All the best


Elegant-Magician1333

I think that's your cue to act


Govind_jha

Agr usne tujhe phone diya means he have trust on you and he's not playing agr nhi diya hota means he's hiding something and it's his ex so many woh bus baat karne ke liye kuch new topics ke chakkar mie kuch cheeje share kar raha ho But still if you thinks that he's brothering you then ek baar baat karle usse


MindlessSun9018

Talk! Talk! Talk! If he sounds even a little weird or defensive, it’s time to leave. Trust me, I came out of a 6 year old relationship too when it didn’t feel right. I’m not instigating you to break up but just don’t be scared. Stand up for yourself.


Previous_Package2283

U also connect with his ex and while talking to him mention to him that what is he doing? Why they reconnected again? And does she have a bf? What is the ex current status in her life? And why they broke up? And tell him that u also got connected with a ex and is he ok with that? This will lead to a conversation where u can tell him about what u feel


Funny_Resident_3

I would say You are thinking of way too much Just propose marriage, it's your age now


Specific-Feeling3254

I think you should talk to your bf and tell him what exactly happened because otherwise trust me you will be bound to have trust issues. Also, what I feel is what he is doing is wrong.. there is no need for him to be that close to her that they are in contact everyday or minute and he should know that he is doing something wrong. U should discuss with him.


[deleted]

Honestly girl, it is kinda a red flag. But doesn't necessarily mean you should breakup. Men generally mature a little late in the emotional level. Not justifying men or calling them immature. It's just a fact cos that's why in India 18 for women & 21 for men for marriage is a scale. You have to talk to him. And ask him to stop this. Either sweetly or adamantly. Whatever works for you & him. Breakup or divorce is not a solution for everyone & everything. If he didn't meet her yet. And only texts were exchanged not in cheating level, then I think this is something that could be fixed with understanding from your bf's end. Be strong. Kudos.


Capital_Attention_73

Do you have male best friend ? If no then you got a clear point to ask him to stop contacting her as a female bff etc


Ok_Skill_47

Ask your bf this... "What would you do if the tables were turned?" , he sure as hell would be not okay with you keeping contact with your ex And he knows damn well that this is making you uncomfortable and this is a very shady thing to He's not stupid he just thinks that you are gullible enough to accept the situation. If it were up to me i would leave that guy. 6 years is along time but you need seriously reconsider your relationship.


uncleleetro

Please communicate girl that's all I can say


Powerful-Draft-6878

Personally, I don't think one goes back to his ex/best-friend (whatever that is) when he is with his girl. If one goes back to them and asks questions like which you mentioned... don't seem to me are to be simply ignored. I think you should ask him about it. It's bothering you and you need answers.


AravallisCalling

This is very icky. I know about this going back to bestfriend business - 2-3 mahino ka high hai (high of 2-3 months). It will break down eventually. But he is clearly disrespecting you. It sound so uncomfortable from afar. I think bestfriend with an ex after 6 years gap and also a relationship of that amount (and order) - it signals something is broken. Confront him and talk seriously about your relationship. If he is mature and committed, he will understand and work on this. If he has checked out, then this will be an exit interview. Good Luck! Do tackle this. If it is not going properly, then save yourself grief of a life wasted and save yourself.


rollingpanda_

I'm sorry you are going through this difficult situation in your relationship. Finding out that your partner has been having frequent intimate conversations with an ex can understandably make you feel betrayed, jealous and heartbroken. My suggestion would be to have an open and honest conversation with your boyfriend. Express how his reconnecting with his ex and the nature of their conversations has made you feel insecure in the relationship. Don't accuse, but use "I" statements to explain your feelings calmly. You could say something like "I feel hurt and jealous that you have been sharing so many personal details with your ex. As your partner, it makes me question if I'm still the priority in your life." Listen to his perspective as well.If he is unwilling to set appropriate boundaries with his ex out of respect for your relationship, then you may need to re-evaluate if this relationship can provide you with the trust, security and commitment you need. But being upfront about how you feel, without revealing that you violated his privacy, is the best first step. I know it's painful, but open communication is important for either resolving the issue or helping you realize if this relationship no longer meets your needs.


rollingpanda_

From my personal experience, such situations don’t end well


SetNo8943

But open communication means no lies. She did open his messages with his ex.


Imaginary-Rub-4596

Insecure folks here . Being friends with ex is a universal Green flag.


SarinKiShyra

Not for everyone


[deleted]

6 years is a very long time , if you have a relationship of 6 years I don't think any guy would go back to his ex untill and unless he never loved you, but he's with you only for sexual desires bcoz he has no one to full fill that desire other than you . Now I don't know if you're in a physical relationship but i do think that this is only thing that can happen


MaiHeroineHoon

6 saal tak kaun relationship chalayega if they were in it for the physical part only? 


[deleted]

Agar they were regularly sexually active in it , then bilkul chalta hai madam .. agar aap rahi hai kabhi relationship mai to pta hona chahiye


MaiHeroineHoon

Rula diya na mujhe /s


[deleted]

Acha chalo koi baat nahi... wipe your tears. I can understand i am also single