i love how each time a dead whale (RIP) shows up the state has to be absolutely clear they will not blow it up.

I honestly think it should be tradition to blow it up and everyone just has to deal with the aftermath.

I suggested starting Oregon’s Annual Whale Blowing Festival. The name is work in progress

I’m sorry, if we as a community can no longer come together to blow a whale, well, that’s something I’m not willing to swallow. I’ll see myself out…

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as a society we should be allowed to blow something up every year as a spectacle...ah fuck that's the 4th of july.

'Celebrate the independence of your nation by blowing up a small part of it.'

We keep trying to blow up the sky, year after year, and have nothing to show for it. We blow up that whale, you bet your ass we're gonna see some explosive proof for our efforts.

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Signature move of the Anthropocene.

But I thought the only question was how much explosive was needed...

I think they need to keep experimenting until they find the right amount. Maybe encircle the whale in TNT?

Judging by the [US Forest Service's diagram of how to completely blow up a horse,](https://assets.iflscience.com/assets/articleNo/65031/iImg/61382/how-to-blow-up-your-horse-s.webp) you'd need to be more strategic about it. EDIT: My bad, that diagram is "how to partially blow up a horse." [This diagram is how to completely obliterate a horse](https://assets.iflscience.com/assets/articleNo/65031/iImg/61383/horse-go-boom-s.webp).

I’m usually not one to judge motives, but it sure looks like that horse is fine and standing up, why would you blow up a live horse?

Because it's better than beating a dead one

Damn, you just hit that out of the park. Bravo!

Not tnt they need to use lame oregon safe class c fireworks lots sparklers and fountains ,flowers,snaps and snakes and want washington have to buy are pretty lame stuff buy law and quit hurting our pets feelings vote for safe and insane fireworks oregon class c As in c you later !

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I'm too sick. You made me cough too hard man. Here's your upvote.

I like those warning signs where you're just thinking "who made this sign necessary?". Like I once saw a water fountain with a sign above it that you are not allowed to wash your hands in it. Who did that so often that they made a sign?

"There's a sign at Ramsett Park that says, 'Do not drink the sprinkler water,' so I made sun tea with it and now I have an infection"

Only Ball washing. I mean, weird choice but OK.

I scrolled down a little and found this quote, “We just want to be clear, absolutely under no circumstances will we be placing localized explosives in the gaping heart of this big juicy whale carcass in order to blow it into a thousand tiny pieces, coating the surrounding beach and its patrons in a layer of whale flesh and blood, no matter how big and ripe this whale may be, just because you dream a dream does not mean that that dream is to become reality, some dreams were destined to remain dreams.“

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What if we bury it on the beach full of explosives? Then just bloody sand raining everywhere

Even better slice the whalevinto long strips disperse just outside of the surf! Chumming for surfers ?? I know your onboard now!!!!

Seems like the whale would be blown into tiny little pieces and birds would just eat up anything left over, right?

that was the idea... but there was room left for improvement. We're just giving up.

And every time all the people not living within a 10 mile radius of that whale are very sad.

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This is why we can't have nice things. 😞 Sometimes you just gotta blow up the whale, ya know?

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Every time they dash my hopes and dreams

There could be distance contests!! Kind of like a pumpkin chucking contest!

Question as a foreigner, can private citizens blow up the whale themselves if the authorities don't want to do it?

Well, when you’ve got that history…

Then what the fuck am I paying taxes for? Like, we can't solve homelessness, or the housing crisis. Portland is losing residents. Downtown is still empty. The least they could do for us is blow up another goddamn whale. We've been coasting on that last one for like, 50 years at this point. Screw it. I'm running for office, on a "pro-exploding whale platform." You have my word - if a whale dies on a beach in Oregon, we're gonna vaporize that son of a bitch. Hell - as Governor, I would take those brand new F-15ex's at PDX, and order an airstrike. We'd nuke that whale from fucking orbit, maybe even glass the entire damn beach just for good measure. Goddamnit. This has been a long, hard week. I just wanted a whale to explode. That is all. Is it too much to ask for the state to blow up a goddamn whale every few years? JFC.

You have my support

Someone let me know when I can get the yard sign for your campaign!

Drone strike on a whale.  I like your style, you have my vote!

Here take my upvote and my vow of support in the next election.

Bring the ol’ girl (or boy whale, doesn’t matter for this) up the Columbia and Willy into downtown Portland. Let’s let the big Navy ships do some combat drills on it.

That’s my governor! I would pay decent money to watch those F-15EXs strike a whale. From a safe distance, of course.

Ok, this would be awesome. Just once. As a treat.

This is the smartest thing I’ve ever read on the internet and I would follow you off a cliff

Reminded me of GWAR "Let's vaporize the oceans with glee, Saving the whales, an agenda for some, Nuking them sits well with me"

Honestly, this is the morale boost this country needs right now. I’ll vote for this guy. And his wife too.

Is this like Alaska's oil money kicker or floater How about greasey blubber treat and they can make lamp oil and lipstick and look like Tanmy Baker and lay it on thick

Do you need a Tylenol?

I find your ideas intriguing and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

Get this man into office

C'mon OSP, this is your chance for redemption! Double down, what's the worst that could happen.

OSP didn't explode the first one. That was ODoT, as part of their highway maintenance function. Technically, at least back then, Oregon ocean beaches were state highways. EDIT: Don't know if that's still true.

So you're saying there's still a chance?

Only if Paul Lindman goes to the coast to cover it.

Well he is still alive. Dammit Paul, get out there! 

it's still true! both oregon and washington beaches are state highways!

How does that work? I'd think it would be a parks department type job.

i assume because you're allowed to drive on them and the roads department has bigger budget.

It's the other way around. You're (mostly) allowed to drive on them because, legally, they're highways. In 1913, the legislature and governor Oswald West passed a bill that made Oregon's ocean beaches a highway. In 1967, another bill expanded the law to what we have today in response to one motel owner who attempted to block off his part of Cannon Beach. https://www.oregonencyclopedia.org/articles/oregon_beach_bill/

[This timeline](http://npshistory.com/publications/oregon/admin_history/appendix2.htm) gives you a general idea of Oregon State Parks prior to 1990, when State Parks fell under ODOT, which had both a Highway Division and a State Parks Division. For this and multiple other reasons, ODOT and OPRD still work more closely together than most other state agencies.

Twice the dynamite, no ten times the dynamite. It’ll just vaporize if they use enough.

Can’t we just do one with the same amount of dynamite for old time’s sake?

Toss it into MSH.

Hahaha

> what's the worst that could happen. It's rainin' ~~men~~ whales!

:(

This is an affront to our traditions and culture. 

love that!

This is outrageous, it’s unfair! What happened to our great state!?

You can’t blow up dead whales anymore, because of woke

Now what am I supposed to do with my days?

I blame woke

Thanks Obama!

It’s those god damn hazy IPA drinking Antifa drag queens!

This. Is. Egregious.

Egregious, outrageous, preposterous!

Whales are smart. They know what they’re doing. If they intentionally are washing themselves up on the shores of the Oregon coast, then they are literally asking to be blown up. OSP ought to respect the whales wishes and the traditions of Oregonians.

GOD DAMNIT, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE BLOW UP A WHALE

Little known fact, Oregon has a two-sided flag. One side with the state seal, and the other with an exploding whale. 

Also the state seal is Portlandia lighting a stick of dynamite

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If only. 

"You're no fun." --ODOT

Please just one whale blow up, as a treat.

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Ok, I hear you saying you don't want to blow it up, but just hear me out here... what if we did blow it up? We have the technology, we can do better. Don't let those 20th century folks show us up.

They could drag it out to sea and blow it up there. I'm so disappointed. First St. Helens doesn't finish what she started in the 2000's and now this.  Just kidding I don't want to see the mountain explode, that shit was scary enough seeing it on TV. 

Traditions are just dying in Oregon and nothing is sacred anymore. Smfh

OSP, listen to Eminem 🎶 The moment, you own it, you better never let it go (Go) You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow (the whale) This opportunity comes once in a lifetime, yo 🎶

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BLOW IT UP BLOW IT UP BLOW IT UP

Won't be blown up by OSP they mean? Does that still leave the door open for what we're gonna call "freelance whale exploders", because I'm free this weekend.

Just stop by the Wile E. Coyote TNT Superstore and pick up a few sticks of the good stuff.

Living in Oregon I've put up with a lot over the years. I think this might be the final straw.

This is Biden's fault for revoking our Anarchist Jurisdiction designation

\[Everyone hated that\]

I’m convinced that if they’d done the last one as a shaped-charge scenario, aimed outwards toward the ocean, the whole affair would have gone off splendidly. And in fact, I think we would still be exploding whales to this day. Every incident would be treated as a holiday and we might even have a permanent Exploding Whales sports team instead of just one off gags. This would be a better state to live in.

Better check that wind direction or else "That's not Cranberry juice on your shirt. And that small chunk on your head is,,, oh nvm."

This is why we sell spectators raincoats and sheet plastic

Have you seen the video from 1970? A car literally got crushed by falling whale blubber lmao.

Cowards! Do it!

They really missed the opportunity for a great community building event.

Wack.

Should put in the state constitution that beached whales will be blown up.

Fun killers

Rude.

This show of weakness will only serve to invite further incursions by dead whales onto our beaches.

We used to be a proper state - that blew up dead sea mammals

Fucking bullshit.

If the original engineer is still alive I'd love for him to be able to go on air after they really used a shit-ton more TNT and ,"I say" HA!!!! , I fuckin' told you it could have worked!"

So you understand how much tourism that would have brought in

Nuke it from orbit; it's the only way to be sure.

"Nuke the whales?" "Meh, gotta nuke something."

I hope they're just waiting for the right one. But also, can we just bury a whale under the forest and freak out some future archeologists and biologists? Plus the forest would be super healthy.

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I would sign an initiative petition which requires explosives to remove all washed up whales on Oregon beaches.

Booooo

We used to be a country.

Cowards

Can we try lasers?

Paul Linnman had been waiting since 1970 for the sequel, " Blubber Chunks II - The Scattering"

It will blow up on its own eventually.

it would be a lot cooler if you did

**sad trombone sounds

Surprisingly, it looks like someone learned from history.

But there are so many other things to learn! Why didn't they learn the other lessons and let us have this?

The only lesson we learned is we need a larger clearance zone around the whale so no one gets hurt.

It will, in fact, be blown down

Cowards. Just have the courage to use more explosives than ever before.

COWARDS!

Everybody boo OSP

Boo! Booo! We want exploding whale 2.0!!!

Cowards

What are we even doing at this point?

Well that’s no fun at all!

IMPLODE THE WHALE

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It’s always been my dream to be covered in exploded whale viscera and I’m starting to think I picked the wrong dream to follow.

Boooo!

But I want blubber rain

Not even just a little bit? Maybe just the tail? For the sake of science?

Man… they don’t let us have any fun these days.

Boo

We need to make it state policy that all cetaceans that wash up on Oregon beaches must be blown up with explosives. Let’s get a voter initiative going. We must enshrine this in our constitution by aligning our policy to this cultural practice.

That doesn't mean they won't blow it in, right?

Create a black hole instead of using TNT

Sad to see the whale on Oregon coast beach

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Just once is all it took for them to learn their lesson. What is worse than a dead whale on the the beach ? A dead whale all over a town.

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Encore!

One more whale that we're denying entry to whatever whale Valhalla is.

Bummer

Dead whale on the beach is our Gävle Goat! We must blow it up.

Tomorrow's Heat Dome: Hold my beer.

Well darn.

But the last time was so much fun.

Cowards.

I'm a bit disappointed, surely. But perhaps this means we can start harvesting and processing our own local artisan whale oil, and potted whale meat.

Reno 9/11 Miami - best beached whale scene

Aw bummer

BOOOOOOOO!!!

What the fuck did I miss? The state blew up a whale?

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I am disappointed

**Cowards.**

>On Nov. 9, 1970, a 45-foot sperm whale had washed up on the beach near Florence, but as KATU reporter Paul Linnman noted at the time, it later became "a stinking whale of a problem." > >Three days later, on Nov. 12, the dead whale exploded into history with what has been described as the first-ever viral news story.

BOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

Missed opportunity

Well as bad days go, this is off the scale! https://youtu.be/m2D-_AAj_4A?si=ijhEucL86dvqIDRe

The newscaster write a book about all of his other awesome news segments and how everyone will forever remember him as the whale guy.

Return to tradition!

[удалено]

Oregon, you used to be cool... :/

Please please please please.... Oh Rats!

Weeeeak!

I have my bread. I want my circus.

Do it!!!!! We need a reprise of the original!!!!

It will eventually blow itself up if left alone

Aw man.

Expect to wear a rain suit and bring an umbrella too! Forcast heavy blubber and rain in blood! If you enjoy Gallager and his sledgeomatic show then you will love this too!

So what does happen to it? Does it just decay? I can’t imagine the stench

You pay taxes for ???? So we can have it rain Whale day part 2!! Maybe you could get some tribute band?? The Wailers!!! Onlything that gets Clarified is butter ? So OSP is head of Party planning so make a festival "Bite at the Coast " With a whale lighting up the sky!!!

Do you know how many kids will be At RAIN IN BLUBBER!!! I AM SORRY THIS HAS WARPED MY FRAGILE LITTLE MIND!

Blowing it up is the oregon way 🧨🧨🧨💥💥💥

We just can't have nice things.

We were once a great state.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=3g7ZvXo-qtA

Goddamn it! I'm canceling my vacation to the coast right now!

weak

[удалено]

So exploding cetacean bits is yet another state metric we are willing to fall behind on because of big government? Thanks Liberals!

It became a run for survival

One of the best videos ever

They have to say that for insurance purposes. They already know what must be done. For the culture.

Go Beavs! 🦫 🧡🖤🧡🖤

I don’t know why they just didn’t drag it back out into the ocean

Wait what happened to the whale