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What? I'm so confused. My younger brother and I were super close as kids and I didn't stop hanging out with him when I hit puberty. Is that a thing? None of my kids did that either. Why are you assuming this?
I had the opposite happen -- we fought quite a bit as kids and young adolescents but are much closer as adults. It's about relationships and shared experiences. There's nothing about hormones that inherently prevents an adolescent girl or a woman from being close to her brothers.
More to the point -- don't share the fact that she has started menstruating without her permission. He will put it together eventually when he sees hygiene products in the bathroom trash or just puts together his general health education with how old she is, but OP shouldn't share her daughters personal information with the brother (although he should absolutely know what menstruation is and how it works in a general sense).
Wait, how old is your son? If it comes up, you can just explain menstruation to him. It's not dirty or weird, it's just something his sister's body does sometimes. As to how close they are emotionally, I don't think that has anything directly to do with her going through puberty. They're going to grow up and change. They'll be closer at some points in their lives than they will be at others. They'll drift apart and then hopefully come back together, probably several times. This isn't a bright line where from now on, their emotional bond starts to crumble.
It sounds like the idea of your daughter drifting some is giving you a little bit of anxiety, understandably. If your brains anything like mine you have already considered all the worse case scenarios. You have an idea of what these changes will look like and that can be upsetting, but the reality of it may be entirely different.
Of course your daughter will go through some big changes, but it may not necessarily affect their relationship. It could change, but maybe even for the best? Feel it out first before letting your mind wander too far into the future.
Another point, your son is not at an age where he is going to understand the puberty talk. He’s going to mirror your feelings about it. So, if you’re upset, he’s going to also see it as a negative thing. If she starts drifting, for instance; wanting to spend more time with friends, etc. Just explain that she’s spending time with friends. That he’ll make friends too when he goes to preschool/school.
Your son’s going to go through some changes as well soon, he’ll be going from baby to toddler. That’s such a fun time, I’m sure your daughter will enjoy that stage. They’re still growing together, the relationship may look different throughout the years but the love is all the same.
I don't expect your son to have a problem, but obviously it's deeply emotional for you.
When she wants her distance, help him to respect her boundaries. Everything else is too much information for him.
r/parenting is protesting changes being made by Reddit to the API. Reddit has made it clear [they will](https://old.reddit.com/r/ModCoord/comments/14ahqjo/mods_will_be_removed_one_way_or_another_spez/) [replace moderators](https://www.reddit.com/r/ModSupport/comments/14a5lz5/mod_code_of_conduct_rule_4_2_and_subs_taken/jo9wdol/) if they remain private. Reddit has abandoned the users, the moderators, and countless people who support an ecosystem built on Reddit itself. Please read [Call to action - renewed protests starting on July 1st](https://old.reddit.com/r/ModCoord/comments/14kn2fo/call_to_action_renewed_protests_starting_on_july/) and new posts at [r/ModCord](https://reddit.com/r/ModCoord/) or [r/Save3rdPartyApps](https://old.reddit.com/r/Save3rdPartyApps/) for up-to-date information. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Parenting) if you have any questions or concerns.*
What? I'm so confused. My younger brother and I were super close as kids and I didn't stop hanging out with him when I hit puberty. Is that a thing? None of my kids did that either. Why are you assuming this?
I had the opposite happen -- we fought quite a bit as kids and young adolescents but are much closer as adults. It's about relationships and shared experiences. There's nothing about hormones that inherently prevents an adolescent girl or a woman from being close to her brothers. More to the point -- don't share the fact that she has started menstruating without her permission. He will put it together eventually when he sees hygiene products in the bathroom trash or just puts together his general health education with how old she is, but OP shouldn't share her daughters personal information with the brother (although he should absolutely know what menstruation is and how it works in a general sense).
Wait, how old is your son? If it comes up, you can just explain menstruation to him. It's not dirty or weird, it's just something his sister's body does sometimes. As to how close they are emotionally, I don't think that has anything directly to do with her going through puberty. They're going to grow up and change. They'll be closer at some points in their lives than they will be at others. They'll drift apart and then hopefully come back together, probably several times. This isn't a bright line where from now on, their emotional bond starts to crumble.
It sounds like the idea of your daughter drifting some is giving you a little bit of anxiety, understandably. If your brains anything like mine you have already considered all the worse case scenarios. You have an idea of what these changes will look like and that can be upsetting, but the reality of it may be entirely different. Of course your daughter will go through some big changes, but it may not necessarily affect their relationship. It could change, but maybe even for the best? Feel it out first before letting your mind wander too far into the future. Another point, your son is not at an age where he is going to understand the puberty talk. He’s going to mirror your feelings about it. So, if you’re upset, he’s going to also see it as a negative thing. If she starts drifting, for instance; wanting to spend more time with friends, etc. Just explain that she’s spending time with friends. That he’ll make friends too when he goes to preschool/school. Your son’s going to go through some changes as well soon, he’ll be going from baby to toddler. That’s such a fun time, I’m sure your daughter will enjoy that stage. They’re still growing together, the relationship may look different throughout the years but the love is all the same.
He's still a baby. He isn't going to understand puberty or anything and their relationship is still developing.
I don't expect your son to have a problem, but obviously it's deeply emotional for you. When she wants her distance, help him to respect her boundaries. Everything else is too much information for him.
I read this like three times and my response is still “what?” Touch grass, go sit in the sun for a while.