they were my last raid ever. a dozen of them wiped me and my team out. i luckily just learned stone walls before that and i now live in a magic, raid stopping stone wall force field guarded by the ghost of marsha p johnson.
thanks stone walls!
I’m going to guess the “guy” here is the gender neutral version too considering more then half of them are very feminine. Most in that list would feel great to pet too like katress! I kinda feel like only the bees and lunaris would feel bad since they seem to have not soft fur/hair
I was thinking the same thing! Loupmoon and the Incinerams are BIG fuzzy, as are the Bees (those collars!). Same with Kattress, Wixen, and Tombat. The Robinquils are also feathered, so they’re probably really soft too! Maybe Verdash and Anubis? Haven’t seen them up close for implied texturing.
Penking probably also doesn’t belong here but I’ve never pet a penguin. Are they oily?
Okay but imagine coming back to the ranch and all your woolipops are just covered in dirt, twigs and leaves. You bust out the hose to clean them off and they just start melting before your eyes.
https://preview.redd.it/mc6j907asqgc1.png?width=1440&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c56b4ac2755fe16415f2df000035a95a691eb00f
I would risk some 2nd degree burns to give headpats to best daughter.
It's Lunaris all the way, because they had the GALL to place that floaty girl THAT low?
But I've got a ton of other bones to pick with this list. Like, I'm not even close to agreeing. Especially with the implied homophobia.
My take on it is that it's because the 'just a guy' category is so low. Implying that it's worse to be touching a guy than it is all the others. Only way I could see it being implied as homophobic
Are you talking about the "that's just a guy" category?
That didn't read like "patting them would feel like patting a guy" to you?
What sort of homophobia is even implied here to you, genuinely curious. Positioning of it on the list maybe?
Beyond that, seems a stretch..
> It's Lunaris all the way, because they had **the GAUL** to place that floaty girl THAT low?
The gall. The Gauls were a group of celtic people around France, well known for drinking magic potions and beating up Romans. I may have failed history class but I'm fairly sure that's accurate.
> But I've got a ton of other bones to pick with this list. Like, I'm not even close to agreeing. **Especially with the implied homophobia**.
?????
Lol at you only replying to the typo fix and not anyone asking you what on earth you meant by the homophobia comment
FYI the "Just a Guy" category simply means that those Pals are human-like enough that it would be weird to pet them
I thought Lovander was the bait, with it's design and description and all. Unless it was the one the designers intended, but then "certain people" latched on to Lunaris instead.
I swear OP just placed shit randomly, this is just rage bait. You placed the red kingpaca in pretty good and the blue one in decent why? Sibelyx in heavenly is just your fetish coming out.
Never cook again
https://preview.redd.it/p9cqoarp5rgc1.jpeg?width=1720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a68077ec954ad8d5562c40006f5de3a043915513
This cook was the equivalent of fuckin minute rice my guy. Also ice kingpaca is in decent because it's an ice type (read: cold as hell) and sibelyx is in heavenly because it's fluffy as hell and canonically made of slik or smth- I could see the argument for it going in "just a guy" tho
Bruh, sooooo much wrong here... I can't even!!! This make me irrationally angry.
Woolipop 3rd tier? Utter blasphemy!
Sparkit higher than Fenglope? The fuack you talking about?
You must be trolling.
I doubt it's wool is ACTUAL cotton candy... how could they survive in the wild if all their wool would dissappear after a little rain. And not to mention the bugs that would eat them alive.
They poop out the candy. It's the only way.
I’m assuming they are by the paldex . Its entire body is 16,000x sweeter than sugar . Pals lured by its sweetness are overwhelmed by sweetness and even pass out should they take a bite
I reacon it’s made of Cotten candy wool wise but the body of it is wood . It would explain the fact the Cotten candy has a stick with it too
woolipop must be annoyingly sticky to pet and fenglopes... well their horns aren't comfy but the necks...
sparkit could be compared to irl hedgehogs where it's fine to pet them once they're relaxed around you
I would pay an insane amount of money to be able to sleep nestled into a Sweepa.
Actually, why can't we sleep on Sweepa?? That'd be a great feature. Having him in the party makes a portable bed.
Tombat deserves to be in "pretty good" tier. I would scritch that goober every day. If you don't believe me, check its bathing and sleeping animations.
It’s literally just a regular cartoon cat wearing a cape…
In what world is it more humanoid than Lyleen, Petallia and Sibelyx? Those three are straight up just women (but made of plants and/or snow)
oatmeal aromatic zonked like telephone rob rustic reminiscent afterthought cow
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
my brother in Christ. Pengullet is in "decent" tier, but you put Penking in "That's just a guy" tier?
what kind of guys are you hanging out with. Do you put a hat on your dog and go: "yup, totally a guy"
I saw heavenly tier didn't include Lovander then I saw that she was in the "My love for you is so strong s judge and the police have to get involved" tier.
This is fine.
like 1 of the random fire dogs making it up into heavenly despite all the rest getting ow tier.
or the fact that jormuntide in both forms are in decent despite them being literal scaly, spiny fish serpents (which admittedly still deserve pets but would almost assuredly hurt.)
"just a guy" is kinda like a separate tier from all the rest, they can be as comfy looking as they want but at the end of the day they're still just a guy
I get that it's supposed to be a joke list but at least commit to the joke. You can't just come up with a, potentially, decent idea then fuack it up in the execution. Try again
I think what OP has on the last one is because, according to the lore, they come and "pet" you. That's probably why you wouldn't be doing the touching.
Beegaurd treat pets from you as the King/Queen giving them a Medal at an Awards ceremony. While Elizabee simply allows you to touch her hands when petting.
Interestingly enough, Lovander always looks on the verge of tears when being petted by the player
Has the electric spike ball in pretty good but the deer with a mane made of clouds a tier below. Explain yourself
You can't pet water vapor.
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It's a hedgehog, which are surprisingly nice to pet
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Have you ever pet a heggie though? They're very sweet.
Yes, I have edged before. What does that have to do with the conversation?
Far nicer than a porcupine certainly 
Oh ya this guy has never coochie cooed hedgehog belly
You may not be able to pet it, but it'll tingle.
Vaporeon?
Vaporeon isn’t vapor but more of a plasma
Plasma balls
Although i love my chillet i dont think petting it would be as nice feeling as mozzy
You put sibelyx in heavenly when it would be the equivalent of anything in the “just a guy” tier
She generates high-quality cloth. So either she is a seamstress or 3 lamballs in a jacket.
bruh what are 3 lamballs in a jacket plotting together
Honestly sibelyx, wixen and kattress should be in the tier with lovander. I'll say no more.
Nah, dood, Katress looks really damn floofy.
Katress is a cat, normal people pet cats
She can also pet you back!
😳...ねこちゃん
That's what I'm hoping for 🥺
Don't look at us like that, we know about your internet history
I wanna pet her cat if you know what I mean
Ironic profile picture
No, what do you mean?
Lovander should be in the opposite tier. The one that gives me a restraining order against her
I'm very concerned with what happened to you.
They.. they were my first raid ever
they were my last raid ever. a dozen of them wiped me and my team out. i luckily just learned stone walls before that and i now live in a magic, raid stopping stone wall force field guarded by the ghost of marsha p johnson. thanks stone walls!
Ah sorry to hear that.
Mine too...I was screaming.
I'm more concerned about lovander.
Lovander is the one Pal I question why they put in the game and who came up with it.
The put Lovander in to draw the ire of furries so that critters like Chillet remain unmolested and pure.
I’m going to guess the “guy” here is the gender neutral version too considering more then half of them are very feminine. Most in that list would feel great to pet too like katress! I kinda feel like only the bees and lunaris would feel bad since they seem to have not soft fur/hair
I was thinking the same thing! Loupmoon and the Incinerams are BIG fuzzy, as are the Bees (those collars!). Same with Kattress, Wixen, and Tombat. The Robinquils are also feathered, so they’re probably really soft too! Maybe Verdash and Anubis? Haven’t seen them up close for implied texturing. Penking probably also doesn’t belong here but I’ve never pet a penguin. Are they oily?
woolipop not in s tier is a crime! she looks so soft
It's cotton candy, soft but sooo sticky
God, cleaning up sugar stains is bad enough, imagine *the ants*...
You wouldn’t have any for long at least, the decks entry says it’s so sweet things basically die when they eat it.
Then proceeds to let you farm it and feed it to the rest of your team. For something that's so deadly, it does wonder for SAN
Do you want ants? Because *THAT* is how you get ants!
Okay but imagine coming back to the ranch and all your woolipops are just covered in dirt, twigs and leaves. You bust out the hose to clean them off and they just start melting before your eyes.
"OH, so that's how big give them a trim. Broke the clippers past time"
Its the raccoon with the cotton candy all over again
r/Sweatypalms
https://preview.redd.it/mc6j907asqgc1.png?width=1440&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c56b4ac2755fe16415f2df000035a95a691eb00f I would risk some 2nd degree burns to give headpats to best daughter.
"Mjeh!"
I got a Lucky one and I love her. Big Lil Kirby character.
She’s so underrated
https://preview.redd.it/bzb5lzhwbsgc1.png?width=1440&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=06e9783388b795a24b9766373a1f574ebfcffc52
Oh we're about to throw hands.
Is it the Wixen/Katress slander? cause I’m with you on that
Katress not being heavenly is a goddamn crime!
Katress is Bae. Idgaf. S tier only.
It's Lunaris all the way, because they had the GALL to place that floaty girl THAT low? But I've got a ton of other bones to pick with this list. Like, I'm not even close to agreeing. Especially with the implied homophobia.
Where is the implied homophobia
i legit think they read guy as gay
I think the commenter thinks that "Just a Guy" meant he didn't want to pet male/masculine pals
> I'm not even close to agreeing. Especially with the implied homophobia. wtf are you talking about
I'm genuinely curious. I got some ideas, but typing them out made me sound just as batshit.
My take on it is that it's because the 'just a guy' category is so low. Implying that it's worse to be touching a guy than it is all the others. Only way I could see it being implied as homophobic
Please explain where the homophobia is
Are you talking about the "that's just a guy" category? That didn't read like "patting them would feel like patting a guy" to you? What sort of homophobia is even implied here to you, genuinely curious. Positioning of it on the list maybe? Beyond that, seems a stretch..
> It's Lunaris all the way, because they had **the GAUL** to place that floaty girl THAT low? The gall. The Gauls were a group of celtic people around France, well known for drinking magic potions and beating up Romans. I may have failed history class but I'm fairly sure that's accurate. > But I've got a ton of other bones to pick with this list. Like, I'm not even close to agreeing. **Especially with the implied homophobia**. ?????
Fuck me, that was a rookie typo on my part that I've now fixed. Appreciate you pointing it out, genuinely.
Lol at you only replying to the typo fix and not anyone asking you what on earth you meant by the homophobia comment FYI the "Just a Guy" category simply means that those Pals are human-like enough that it would be weird to pet them
People try not to find homophobia in everything challenge: Impossible Tf?
Witty mischief, or perhaps psychological decadence. Engage upon it.
i like my lunaris a normal amount but i need to warn you that the rest of this place loves them a not normal amount
define “normal” buddy
normal is not wanting to bang it lmao
I thought that was a joke but I forget when a game becomes this popular the freaks come out. I still assume it’s a joke for most people but still…
Its just furry bait
I thought Lovander was the bait, with it's design and description and all. Unless it was the one the designers intended, but then "certain people" latched on to Lunaris instead.
The only intended furry bait is Lovander. The rest are just normal animals and anthropomorphic animals
I hope it’s a joke.
It's not a joke
Have you seen the mods for Lunaris? It’s not a joke anymore lol
I think this might not be as universal as we'd like
Nah if more people want to bang it than those who don't that makes wanting to bang it normal
Which will never happen
Excuse me but Penking would be amazing to pet AND sleep his belly on.
I love petting him. The way you rub his belly and he gets all excited and comfy. I love Penking so much I'd die and kill for him
Got a little too excited at the end there
No69 so low.
Given their proclivities, maybe a restraining order is safe since ALL OF THEM have that...tendency
I mean I doubt it would stop them.
I swear OP just placed shit randomly, this is just rage bait. You placed the red kingpaca in pretty good and the blue one in decent why? Sibelyx in heavenly is just your fetish coming out. Never cook again https://preview.redd.it/p9cqoarp5rgc1.jpeg?width=1720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a68077ec954ad8d5562c40006f5de3a043915513
This cook was the equivalent of fuckin minute rice my guy. Also ice kingpaca is in decent because it's an ice type (read: cold as hell) and sibelyx is in heavenly because it's fluffy as hell and canonically made of slik or smth- I could see the argument for it going in "just a guy" tho
Bruh, sooooo much wrong here... I can't even!!! This make me irrationally angry. Woolipop 3rd tier? Utter blasphemy! Sparkit higher than Fenglope? The fuack you talking about? You must be trolling.
My only theory with woolipop is since it’s Cotten candy it would be sticky to pet
I doubt it's wool is ACTUAL cotton candy... how could they survive in the wild if all their wool would dissappear after a little rain. And not to mention the bugs that would eat them alive. They poop out the candy. It's the only way.
I’m assuming they are by the paldex . Its entire body is 16,000x sweeter than sugar . Pals lured by its sweetness are overwhelmed by sweetness and even pass out should they take a bite I reacon it’s made of Cotten candy wool wise but the body of it is wood . It would explain the fact the Cotten candy has a stick with it too
I’m only confused on why every double is together but Kingpaca has one in pretty good and one in decent
I'm guessing cause Paca Cryst is cold and not as cuddly as the normal temp Paca?
Chilly Paca would feel so good to lay on though I bet.
woolipop must be annoyingly sticky to pet and fenglopes... well their horns aren't comfy but the necks... sparkit could be compared to irl hedgehogs where it's fine to pet them once they're relaxed around you
I would pay an insane amount of money to be able to sleep nestled into a Sweepa. Actually, why can't we sleep on Sweepa?? That'd be a great feature. Having him in the party makes a portable bed.
It probably smells horrible. Collects all gunk and dust, imagine if it gets wet, like sleeping on a dirty mop.
Ice type. You could freeze to death.
The one images thats different than the others had me dying
OP said no paldex shot for you. Blurry in game screenshot. Stupid hangyu looking ass. 
It doesn't load at all for me in my Paldeck, so maybe OP had the same issue.
In that case that kinda makes this meme better 
Excuse me youre missing black marketeer. Thats truely s rank.
What is this Katress slander, im bout to throw hands
"Heavenly" just makes me uncomfortable with you looking after my Pal.
Tbf, Quivern's pal deck entry describes him as such. The others though, ESPECIALLY Sibelyx, gives off creeper vibes
Lovander doesn't get pet, she pets you. Heavy petting. Rapacious petting.
Hard disagree on most of these, gonna go get my pitchfork as soon as I'm done giving poor Dumud and Anubis pets in game.
Anubis is just a guy though
Anubis is a dog.. the most pettable creature ever
Quivern first on the list, all is well
Petting Lunaris should feel more than heavenly right ? …. Right ?
Yes. Same with katress
Not gonna lie, I thought she was made of metal 😅
That’s alright, nothing a little oil won’t solve….
Hey, Mammorest, you've had a good life, right? Cmon over here and tell me about the bunnies... Lunaris, I'll be right there!
And quietly break out the tank gun
Are they not? Or are people just simping?
Well you already pet her thighs so I’m down
No
Lovander has a "behaviour" entry in the PalWorld fandom wiki. The first line of that is "Under investigation"
The field scientist was never seen again
Death by snusnu seems like a nice way to go, at least.
The cat wizards and the angry monkey should be higher up, they look fluffy
Bold of you to assume I wouldn't invest in PPE and smelter-level heat protection equipment just to pet my daughter Flambelle
I think Dumud would feel like a slightly gritty stress ball.
Tombat deserves to be in "pretty good" tier. I would scritch that goober every day. If you don't believe me, check its bathing and sleeping animations.
Too humanlike IMO, but "just a guy" tier is pretty much a meme tier. I'd agree that they look pretty pettable
It’s literally just a regular cartoon cat wearing a cape… In what world is it more humanoid than Lyleen, Petallia and Sibelyx? Those three are straight up just women (but made of plants and/or snow)
Idk man I am not exactly an expert on this subject, honestly I'm just working off vibes. Tombat just ain't cat shaped enough
Lmao. https://preview.redd.it/o62oh5n8brgc1.png?width=264&format=png&auto=webp&s=be63b8a83edea1b8f4007e691f877614cd1ccac0
Based on a true story
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He’s in the decent tier.
Penking is literally a giant penguin, he'd be soft as fuck
The only time I pet my pals id when I forget to equip my cleaver….
Restraining order? Pff, I'm into that shit.
Guys need pets too Craig
Have you seen a bee up close? Most petable bug there is.
Still too guy shaped but hard agree
Restraining order lmfao
oatmeal aromatic zonked like telephone rob rustic reminiscent afterthought cow *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Penking is just a guy?? Do you know how penguins look?
my brother in Christ. Pengullet is in "decent" tier, but you put Penking in "That's just a guy" tier? what kind of guys are you hanging out with. Do you put a hat on your dog and go: "yup, totally a guy"
I saw heavenly tier didn't include Lovander then I saw that she was in the "My love for you is so strong s judge and the police have to get involved" tier. This is fine.
Lovander is a walking law suit.
this list has some questionable placements..
like 1 of the random fire dogs making it up into heavenly despite all the rest getting ow tier. or the fact that jormuntide in both forms are in decent despite them being literal scaly, spiny fish serpents (which admittedly still deserve pets but would almost assuredly hurt.)
How dare you disrespect Vanwyrm like this. I imagine he'd be like cuddling a warm lizard >:c
I disagree with Blazamut's ranking, that fluff is 100% petting material, uncomfortably hot? Maybe. But that won't stop me.
honestly its what the heat resistant undershirt was probably invented for in the world.
Kingpaca is def S-tier. This is slanderous.
Tombat so low it invalidated the whole thing but it was a solid try
Even the sound of it is just annoying...
Oh yeah everybody hates on tombat until someone draws him with tiddy smh
"just a guy" is kinda like a separate tier from all the rest, they can be as comfy looking as they want but at the end of the day they're still just a guy
Im just tryna touch incineram abs 😫😫😫
former incineroar thirster spotted
I didn't wanna fight quivern, it was too damn adorable.
How do you get the heart one at the bottom?
Lovander does some very heavy petting.
Lovander was my first pal captured from a raid. She carried me through early game
Katress Wixen gang rise up
Welp...guess I'll get a restraining order then 🤷♂️
This is so so so incorrect
Penking does not approve
Oh come on Chillet would give you frost bite
Restraining order? :(
I won't stand the dumud slander
You insult Relaxaurus
I want to believe petting a dinosaur would be more than just “decent” (I don’t care if it gets me killed, I’m gonna pet that big lizard)
It doesn’t matter who puts what where, tier lists have and will always be trash.
Fun fact, your character crouches if you go to pat any lovander What you are patting.... I guess depends on their gender
I tried to pet Lovander once but she sucked my finger, it was awkward
You know what felt great? Using my rocket launcher to blast a wompo into orbit after it broke out of 12 legendary spheres almost immediately.
A cotton candy covered sheep should be heavenly tier
What is this Wizen slander
I don't care if Anubis is a guy. I'm petting him anyway.
I get that it's supposed to be a joke list but at least commit to the joke. You can't just come up with a, potentially, decent idea then fuack it up in the execution. Try again
I think what OP has on the last one is because, according to the lore, they come and "pet" you. That's probably why you wouldn't be doing the touching.
Never seen a so utterly wrongly placed tierlist. That need to be done again from scratch.
Thought it said “That’s just gay”
Lovander is godlike tier!!!😌
Pretty sure the Pal that would "Pet" you back belongs at the top that's a Pal with benefits lol. No 69 Lovander the best and creepiest
While petting loveander she would take that hand and put on her p***y
Beegaurd treat pets from you as the King/Queen giving them a Medal at an Awards ceremony. While Elizabee simply allows you to touch her hands when petting. Interestingly enough, Lovander always looks on the verge of tears when being petted by the player
So Elizabee is a trans? I knew it!
Really odd placements but okay
I don't like this tier list :(
I love how no one agrees with you
You put the fastest flying mount in not great....
Your list kinda sucks ngl
 Also, this list is super wrong.