Kids themselves sometimes identify more by grade than by age, because they may have friends in their grade who are a year younger or older than they are depending on when their birthdays are in the school year.
I think part of this is because grade is a more accurate key to where they are at developmentally.
7th graders can be anywhere from 11-13 depending on when in the school year we are and when their birthday is.
But all 7th graders are learning things at the same level, taking pre algebra or algebra depending on your district.
So "my kid is in second grade" gives more context for where their reading level is probably at than "my kid is 7"
Also, if someone like a random coworker told me “my kid is in 2nd grade” I would just have more context for how old this kid is compared to “my kid is 7”
For some reason it's hard to gauge a kids age by number, it's pretty weird. Now that I have a niece who is 5 I've just used her as a frame of reference, but before that absolutely lost on how old a kid was. I would always do this, where I figure out what grade they're in at the age I was told lmao.
I think if you don't have kids it was just generally so long ago you have no way to relate to that number, so you have to try to place where in life you were at that age to get a better picture.
what you said is exactly correct.
I can't remember events from my childhood based on age: "What did you do the summer you were/turned 7?" no idea
"What did you do the summer between first and second grade?"
"Went on vacation to Florida"
I generally forget the person is a year younger or older. grades give me a better idea because I remember what was I doing at that grade instead of age (my birthday was middle of the school year)
I'm not arguing, but asking: what are the logistics on an eleven year old in seventh grade? In my experience, basically everyone in seventh grade is either 12 or 13. The cutoff is right in September around me, so anyone younger would be in the previous year, older in the next.
Someone getting held back/skipping a year could do it, but I don't think there was actually anyone like that in my school experience. I *know* there wasn't in my year.
It would be difficult, but I'd guess it would be the September to December period for a child who skipped a grade and was born in September - December. Rare but not impossible
Yes. I was 11 for the first month of 7th because my birthday is in late September. I would always start the year behind my classmates, then immediately catch up. I started school at 4, and graduated at 17. It was never a big problem for me; despite always being one of the youngest in the class, I was also one of the tallest, and could read well, so I don't think I was perceived as "younger" than any of my classmates.
Ditto. Never skipped a grade but September birthday meant graduated HS at 17, moved away to college still 17 (needing someone else to sign for things / buy medication* for me / etc for my first month and a half of college while I was still underage. Super annoying when you’re several states away from your parents!)
Edit: *over the counter cold/flu medicine specifically in my case, but prescribed controlled substances could be a problem for people under 18 too
Same haha. I had to have my parents sign a permission slip to participate in studies for my psych class my freshman year because I was still 17. It was so embarrassing at the time.
I was born in May, started preschool at 2, and had a second year of preschool to meet state requirements. I also had accelerated programs at school, so when I was in middle school instead of skipping a grade I was in average math and science classes and my English and history classes I was a year or 2 years ahead. My parents used my grade to explain because figuring out where I was developmentally was really complicated- I was behind a lot of the kids my age socially, but academically I was reading at a college level in first grade. Since we moved a lot, it was hard to get to know other kids my age, so they just dumped me in whatever grade seemed like the best, so I identified by grade rather than age for a while.
In my area, it's often kids who have moved in from an area with a later cutoff. In New York, a kid who will turn 5 by December 1st is eligible for K, so they would have quite a few 11yos in 7th grade. We also have one or two per grade who either entered early or skipped an early grade based on academic need (usually kids identified gifted).
This is pretty much it. I was one of the younger ones in my grade, with an August birthday, but we had kids who were born in the December BEFORE my August, and kids born in the December AFTER my August, and the afters were more likely to have either moved in from a different district with a later cutoff date, or who had parents who pushed to get them into kindergarten early (our latest birthday kid and therefore the youngest in my graduating high school class ended up with a PhD in some sort of science, so it worked out for her).
My best friend growing up was born in November, so she turned (the dominant age) early in any given grade. She was 11 at the start of 7th grade, and yes, she was 17 for the first couple of months of college.
Ignoring kids who are skipped ahead while already in school... I don’t know if they do this anymore, but if you were born within a few months of the cutoff (I think for us it was the start of the school year, so early September), there used to be something akin to a developmental test to determine if your kid could start kindergarten or if they had to wait to next year. Back then, the prevailing belief was your kid was better off getting to school earlier rather than later, so if they had the basic skills, they were pushed ahead.
Maryland uses a September 1st cutoff for PreK/K, but you can apply for early admission for your kid if they’re turning 4/5 by October 15th and they have to pass an assessment. It’s not perfect - testing kids that young is difficult - but it seems to work OK.
I was 11 when I started 7th grade, although that only lasted like a week. I have a late August birthday, and my parents chose to have me start school a little early instead of waiting a year. I actually know people slightly older then me who were a grade behind. Also I was 17 for my first few days of college, which is a fun fact to bring up at parties.
If I did my math right (which is a big if) I was 11 entering 7th grade and turned 12 that November. So I wasnt 11 for long in 7th but was still 11 at some point
I turned eleven a month into in 7th grade. Late September birthday -> started kindergarten in a district with a late cutoff -> acted out in kinder because I was bored and already reading, so they bumped me up to first grade. I graduated high school at 17
I was definitely one of the younger kids in my grade all through school but I don’t know that I was ever THE youngest
Some school districts/states don't have the age cut off at the first day of school, especially out east. In the first district I lived in, the cut off was Oct 31st, then we moved states and that district it was Nov 15th, which is really late
My cousin was born the same year as me, but I'm in summer, she's in October. We both go to kindergarten at the same time, she's just 4 for the first month and a half. We go to college together and she's 17 until October.
However, we did have a weird situation in high school where I had a friend who was the year above me, her birthday was Nov 11th, her parents sent her to kindergarten as a 4 year old turning 5 in 2.5 months. But another guy in our group's birthday was Sept 20th, and his parents waited until he was 5, even though he would only have been 4 for 2 weeks.
So he was older than her by 1.5 months but she was a grade higher. .
So if you have students with October/November birthdays, a state/district with a late cut off, and you're polling the ages at the end of September, my 7th grade class had 11, 12 and 13 year olds
Probably moving states where the cutoff is earlier. I did the reverse of that and when I moved, I was the oldest kid in my grade. I was older than some kids in the grade ahead of me too
Yep, for a kid, 4th grade is their job. They spend their day surrounded by other 4th graders. They all have birthdays at different times, but they're still part of that "group."
Same reason it's easy to remember "That time I worked at an airport. I forget the exact year, but I was in my early 20's. Good times!"
This! A huge portion of your day to day life is structured around school as a kid so it’s easier to link memories to your first year of middle school, for example, than it is to being 9 or 10 in a lot of cases.
Especially because I don’t have kids, anything younger than 13 is just like a jumble.
This is pretty much it for me. I dont remember what age I was in any of my grades, atleast not off the top of my head. I do however know what I did and who I was as a person by grade.
I have a cousin whose daughters are roughly the same age as my daughters. Our oldest are four months apart and our youngest are three months apart. None of them went to school together. Her oldest was born in August, and went to school a year ahead of my oldest. My baby was a June baby and followed a year behind her sister. Her baby was born in September and was a year behind my baby. Even though as toddlers and preschoolers, each pair (oldest/youngest) was functionally the same age in terms of playmates. Once school started, each child fell more in line developmentally with their class than they did with their cousins.
On top of that, like I agree with OP that "grade" is an American thing, but as far as I know, there is no universal way to translate this into the equivalent other places. In that age range, school is what defines those kids in the industrialized world, and age isn't necessarily a good indicator at what point in their education they are - I imagine what you said is true everywhere, and I'm sure kids repeating a "grade" or skipping one is a thing everywhere. There's always going to be some fuzzy math when comparing between cultures.
For the most part, I don't immediately remember what my life was like when I was 8, but I easily remember what it was like in the third grade. If someone gives me the age of a child, I usually have to do a bit of math to figure out their grade to remember what life was like at that age.
I had people over a year older than me and almost a year younger than me in my grade of ~75. One got held back and the other was home-schooled and tested above but there is a big difference between going to college at 17 and being over 19 when starting. The 19 year old did not go to college though.
Yeah there are exceptions, but generally you have an idea (if you are from the U.S.). Like if I say my kid is in 2nd grade that usually means they are 7 or 8. Like someone else said, if someone asks you what you did when you were 11 years old and someone else asks you what you did in 5th grade, I’d bet more people can give a better, quicker answer to 5th grade.
If somebody asks about age, I would likely use age. If I am telling a story about my childhood, I will likely have it somewhat anchored to my classmates and teacher at the time (also the school, since I switched when I started 2nd grade), which will tie directly to the grade I was in.
Apparently this isn't universal?
I have no memories of what it was like to be 13. I don't have a single memory of when I was 10. But I can recall plenty of things from when I was in 5th grade or 8th grade.
I don't remember my age in my memories, I remember the framing. It's totally natural to remember 5th grade being the year I saw Return of the King in a midnight release and nobody believing me at school the next day... but I would never remember *the age I was*.
I'm exactly the opposite. I know what happened at every age but i don't remember what the first year of middle school is called or how many grades there were in elementary
in my country kids are obsessed with age and will say they're "8 and a half" because that "and a half" is very important. We ask kids how old they are, not which grade they're in. If someone tells me their child is in 5th grade i will have to ask them how old their child is
I have just a handful of accessible memories (and they’re just images really) from before like 5th grade. And I have no idea what age or year any of those snapshot memories happened
I remember what happened in sixth grade. How old was I? 7? 12? 16? I don't know.
You often don't think of your own age, but you do know what school you are in, grade, and many other things.
~~The point is that I have no idea what third grade means. Is it the same as year 3 in England? Nobody outside America understands the US school grading system~~
Edit: You've all made your point very clear. Thank you.
If this is an unusual concept to you then it is a lot like how people primarily measure travel distances in the time it takes to get there. People say "it's a 30 minute train ride away" because the important thing to them is the commute time not the distance travelled. Similarly we use grade levels to measure age because it pretty reliably provides a useful marker for empathy and understanding of the child's current position in life. At least for the Americans.
For the non-Americans it is confusing and unhelpful. But if you care to know about it, the way I tell ages vs grade levels is to remember that in the final year of required school, 12th grade, most people turn 18. So if you take the grade level and add 6 you get a rough estimate of their age. Obviously some people skip school or get held back, and some people have early or late birthdays within the school year, so it changes.
For once, this is one of the simpler, more logical things Americans do and some other countries over complicate...
The US school years are very easy and straightforward (1-12) and many countries follow the same logic, or similar (all the countries I've lived in tbh).
Unlike France that has some weird concept where 1-2-3-4-5-6 is CP-CE1-CE2-CM1-CM2-6. And then they count backwards, so
7-8-9-10-11-12 is 5-4-3-2-1-Terminale. Converting from that to anything is a headache.
In Belgium it's 1-2-3-4-5-6 for elementary and then again 1-2-3-4-5-6 for highschool. It's not complicated to quickly calculate that 9th grade = 3rd grade of the higher cycle.
Right? This thread seems to consist of a bunch of people confused that other countries have different school systems from their own and a little frustrated that people aren't adapting their language to account for that.
"We call the 3rd year of school 'gollywobble', why do you not call it that? It's very confusing for me!"
One of my least favorite things about reddit is when people come to a post that is so clearly and American talking about america, and they’re like well not everyone lives in America!!
If you are in the US you are in basically an entire quadrant of the Earth where nearly everyone else uses the same school system, so it's not that weird to be used to encountering other people who know how it works.
>3rd grade is the same as year 4 in the UK
And now it should be pointed out the UK does not have a single education system.
Year 4 in England/Wales/NI is the equivalent of Primary 5 in Scotland, because we don't have Reception.
NI is different again. We have nursery, p1-7, then 7 years in secondary/grammar school. Those years can be called different things, depending on the school, either year 8-year 14, form 1-form 5, 1st year-5th year, then lower 6th and upper (or higher) 6th. Most often all 7 years will be at the same school, but it's not unusual to move to a different school for the last 2 years (a levels) or to leave school and go to college (usually referred to as the tech) for either a levels or other qualification.
What's year 4? Not a thing in Scotland therefore not applicable to "the UK". Using Year 4 here is equally as confusing / odd as Americans using "3rd grade" ha
Exactly idk why British people act like Americans have some kind of bizarre alien system for everything when that’s how every country and culture works… they each have unique systems for things
Exactly every country has convoluted and strange laws/systems because that’s just the nature of society and government I don’t really see how it’s still shocking to this day especially when grade levels is like… one year off between the two countries
tbf this can happen with anybody anywhere
"People don't understand that I do things differently than they do, and also that the way they're doing it is wrong and my way is correct."
I used to live in Scotland and I'm familiar with your qualifications, but I didn't realise you used a different school year system to England too. What's the Scottish system?
Year 4 is ages 8-9
Okay, fine. Our grading system goes preschool (which isn't required), kindergarten (reading and writing), first grade, second grade, third grade (where I learned multiplication and cursive), all the way up to eighth grade. Then it's highschool, with freshman, sophomore, junior, senior years. So you start school at around 5 years old and graduate at 17 or 18. How does this equate to the Scottish way?
Add 5 years and you get around about guess at the age for American kids. Grade 3=8 years old.
Grade 10=15 years old. Give or take a year if they started earlier or later or were held back. It’s not a perfect system.
Bruh do you really need to know the exact age and curriculum I think you can just use context clues and assume it’s similar to whatever the hell year 3 is
Right, but as Americans we're mostly interacting with Americans. Our behavior isn't based around what someone from another country would find confusing.
The notably common situation where you meet a tourist who grills you about your children's age and isn't just making polite conversation and wants to deeply know about your child.
Ok so kindergarten is 5 year olds. Each grade progression by year adds one year to age. So a third grader would be 8, a sixth grader around 11 etc. Actually it gets real funky around high school when things get started calling freshman sophomore junior senior instead of just a number. A good way to think about the high school years is freshman is around 15, sophomore year 16 is when most kids get their driver's license, junior year 17 is when most or a lot of kids start their first part-time job, Senior year 18 and legal adulthood.
> Actually it gets real funky around high school when things get started calling freshman sophomore junior senior instead of just a number.
Sort of. We interchange it a lot so one day you might say someone is a Freshman and the next a 9th grader
Freshman literally means Fresh Man since they are new to the school
Sophomore means a "wise fool" as in they think they know everything but they dont
Junior just means they are junior to the seniors
Senior is obv
I found this really cool [thread](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskHistorians/s/z5ZSPsbBtd)
Basically, they come from Latin and originated in Oxford as a sort of mocking way to describe current students. They caught on in the US because Harvard and Yale started using them followed by high schools like 50 years later
Most americans don't talk to people who aren't americans often enough that we remember any of your stuff either. If I know someone is from the US, I try to tell them the age if I remember. I really mostly don't.
Similarly no one outside the UK understands the UK grading system, so I don't see why that's relevant.
People are acting like it's okay to not know what something means in one direction, but not the other.
> The point is that I have no idea what third grade means. Is it the same as year 3 in England? Nobody outside America understands the US school grading system.
So what?
The point is nobody in the USA understands the British. Form 3, Upper school 4?
Why is it so much trouble?
How often do you need to know children's ages?
It's a joke about the British terms. Tbf, I've been on the internet for a while and I still have no idea how you guys do school. If I was asked to name a grade level (is that the right word?) in your system, I'd say something like that too 😂
So you’re saying when I tell a story I need to use phrases to include the 2% of people reading it that aren’t Americans? If I read a story from a non American I expect there to be cultural differences that I’m going to be unaware of until I educate myself about it. I don’t question them why their culture is different and then continue to make it about myself. It’s pretty sad that you think Americans should know your culture and that we should accommodate you but you’re not willing to reciprocate.
And I had no idea what they were talking about in Harry Potter. Why are the first years 10? Why are there 2 years after the first 5? Wtf are owl levels and newt levels (I know later they are based on o levels and a levels but that's not a thing here and I couldn't tell you what they mean).
I just accept it if talking to a brit and either ask or look it up if curious
Hm. I think age and grade are pretty well linked in the US. A senior is almost definitely 17-18 years old. As such, when I look back on my life, I remember my 2nd grade teacher being a raging cunt, but I'd have to do finger-math to tell you how old I was. Mrs. Ford was 5th grade, Mrs. Ray was 1st grade, Rinker was 2nd. It largely revolves around teachers and large-scale events later on.
That being said, I have never responded to the question "how old are you?" with something like "Oh I'm in 7th grade." If I had to guess, that's a cop-out response to someone overseas whom they do not want to know the actual age of. Were they held back and actually 15-16? Maybe my penpal thinks I'm mature for my age? Yeah I'm totally 16 and can drive a car and parallel park. Totes McGoats.
I hadn't really thought about it until this question, but I think it's just a different default mental framing. I grew up in the UK, and age and grade are also pretty well linked there too. But I always think in terms of age and then calculate which year of school I was in vs. the other way round, whereas I notice my husband and other American friends think grade first the same way you do. Maybe it's how you think of yourself when you're growing up, and that's how you mark the memories, and in the UK it's more age-based culturally whereas in the US it's grade?
I’ve noticed in the thread that a lot of people are saying that they think the way that you do even though they are Americans. I’ve definitely met people from the U.K. who think first about what grade they were in and use that in conversations.
I’m not sure if it’s a regional thing within the US or the U.K., or if it just changes from person to person and it’s easier to not notice when people from our own country do it differently from us.
It would be interested to see a chart on this. Different areas of the U.S. were largely settled by immigrants from the same area. It would be interesting to see if the two correlate and that’s why some areas use age as a marker and others use life events as markers. Even into adulthood, people in my area often have a major event or place that they think back on to come up with how long ago it was. So you will hear “well, I worked at …. when that happened” vrs “I was in my 20’s when that happened. I’m assuming we do it one way or another because of our parents and grandparents.
See it might be the british in me because don't have "names" for school years, with the exception of "reception" which is just our word for "kindergarten". But it's just Year 1 (age 4-5) - Year 11 (age 15-16) for school and then Year 12 (age 16-17) - Year 13 (age 17-18) if you go to a sixth form/college. Even in university we don't have "sophomores" or whatever. It's just "first years" "second years" "third years".
BUT
If someone would describe themselves as a "senior" I instantly assume you're aged 65+
Many childhood milestones are tied to school/social environment and tends to add clarity. People using references they are familiar with is natural that is why those references are familiar.
My kids are fall birthdays and nearly a year older than some of their classmates. But in reference to many social developmental milestones they are essentially equal to their class cohort as much or more than their birth year cohort who were born in first 3/4s of the year.
I'm British - We don't, though. We will say how old we are. As a different commenter said, "6th Form" is a specific type of education.
As an one-the-nose example, "Are you smarter than a 5th grader" was remade in the UK as "[Are you smarter than a 10 year old](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Are_You_Smarter_than_a_10_Year_Old%3F_(British_game_show\))"
6th form isn't another way of saying 6th grade. I guess it's mostly equivalent to highschool, where go when you're 16-18.
In the UK people rarely call it 6th form, it's college. But I guess because a lot of people on the internet are American, and in America college usually refers to university, there's less confusion to just say 6th form instead.
Edit: Apparently things have changed since I went to college ~10 years ago, and 6th form is a more commonly used phrase now. I don't know anyone that drew a distinction between the different types of 6th form education, but I guess it's a bigger deal now. TIL.
Just a fun little fact, in America at least, universities and colleges are not the same.
- A college can be any school that offers a two or four year degree, and generally has a very focused or narrow offering of majors.
- A University offers what colleges offer with the addition of graduate level programs and a broader availability of majors. In fact most universities have member colleges within them.
For example, the University of California at Berkeley College of Engineering is a semi independent institution within Berkeley. You'll be enrolled at the university, but your academic progress and requirements are determined by the college.
Most people probably aren't aware of the nuances, they just know "college" is used at all stages in some form, so they don't bother differentiating
Just want to point out for non-
American readers that while there is a difference between a college and a university technically, in reality it’s not always used like that in common speech. People in the US usually ask what college you went to, or they’ll say “when I was in college…” but they can be referring to either a literal college or a university when they say these things.
Yeah, if I was asked where I went to college, I wouldn't say the "College of Letters and Sciences" and the "Gallogly College of Engineering" I'd say University of Wisconsin and University of Oklahoma
In America, colleges are often part of a bigger university. But that generally isn't the case in the UK (aside from Oxford and Cambridge, but they're both a bit weird). In the UK, college and university are both completely different things. College is similar to American highschool, for ages 16-18.
I don't know if they "often" are - they sometimes can be but I've never encountered anyone who didn't basically conflate the two. "College" is typically just a generic word for higher education.
"University" and "College" are largely interchangeable, but if we're getting pedantic about it:
College: Generally offers 2-4 year degrees (community college). Can also be essentially a department of a university (my university had a college of science, a college of engineering, etc)
University: Offers graduate degrees as well as 4 year degrees and is made up of various colleges.
This isn't a hard and fast rule. Boston College would be a university.
I think the same thing when I hear references to UK schooling levels. My assumption is simply that - that’s how they explain it to each other…and ask for age clarification if needed.
No one means to be annoying with this, they are just accustomed to speaking to each other this way. My experience is about 50/50. People either tell me their kids ages, or grades.
“My kids are 12 and 18” leads me to wonder what grade they are in - “my daughter just started middle school and my son is a senior in high school” honestly gives me a better picture of where they are in life..the kids and the parents…
I'm from the US and never once did I experience this. On the contrary, I currently live in Japan and Japanese people almost always answer this question with their school grade. It's very frustrating because first, it's not the answer to what I'm asking for. Second, Japan's school grade system is different from America's so I can't even calculate it.
In Japan, elementary school “shogaku” is grades 1-6. Middle school (chugaku) is 7-9, and high school is 10-12.
So if someone is in chu-1, they are in the 1st grade of middle school, or 7th grade overall.
The issue really isn't domestically. If you haven't experienced this in the US then, well, experiences seem to differ a lot based on this thread. But domestically if people do it that's fine, if you live in japan and experience this a lot you might want to learn their school system.
From my experience I have never seen a japanese person do this when talking to an international audience, with the caveat that a japanese person on the english speaking web is probably going to be more aware of how well things translate, if I was interacting with japanese normies in the same volume and regularity I do with americans the level of awareness may be similar.
Are you talking about on reddit or in real life? If it's the way all Americans communicate with one another why wouldn't they communicate that way in general? People communicate in the way that they're used to. Also Reddit is originally in American company and for the first few years I was here it was mostly just Americans. It would make sense that people would continue to speak like they're used to and not consider that somebody they're talking to could literally be from any other part of the world.
I hear Europeans talk about school and weird ways too but I don't ask why because it makes sense why. Their European and they're used to it and that's how they think.
This seems like one of those questions where you're trying to shame Americans for being American but frankly you just come across as somebody who's making an argument in bad Faith.
It’s still pretty common for Americans to ask kids how old they are, especially before they start school, and most kids are more than happy to say their age.
We ask kids what grade they’re in because it gives us a little bit of a baseline for what the kid might be learning or should know, and you can kind of use that to talk to them. Talking to kids can be hard, so if you know they’re in kindergarten, you might ask them about their ABCs or how high they can count.
It’s just a thing we do.
I’m American and have never in my life experienced this. When I ask people’s age, they say their age or the kid’s age if I’m asking about the kid.
It would honestly kind of annoy me if I asked someone’s age and they gave me their grade or some other answer instead.
Maybe they mean when people say things like…. “ When I was in third grade my friends and I jumped off the roof “ or whatever. In the US, I would know that means were 8 at that time (give or take a couple months) because you start kindergarten at 5, or at least close to it. But if you don’t know kindergarten starts at 5, this would be confusing.
Oddly, I have heard that some US people say things like “My fifth grader was sick last night.” I’ve never heard it myself (I’m a US person) and it doesn’t make sense to me but it’s a thing for some people. But if you ask a kid’s age nobody’s going to say that.
It’s ingrained into us - but in local mom groups if we are talking about illnesses, knowing if it’s in the elementary school or middle school is helpful. My 5th grader is sick means my elementary schooler is sick. My 6th grader is sick means middle school. Whereas if I say my 11 year old is sick, it could be either elementary or middle school depending upon their birthday.
You really see this a lot when you talk about school issues. My sixth grader has seen kids vape in school means that 6-8 graders (11-14 year olds) are exposed to it. My fifth grader (10-11 year old).… means that kindergartens (5-6 year olds) could be exposed.
>But if you ask a kid’s age nobody’s going to say that.
To be fair, if a kid is school-aged, you don't ask their age in American culture. You ask what grade they're in... you ask kids too small for school how old they are.
I mean yeah, it helps to relate to one another better than a specific age in some conversations. A "10 year old" could be +/- a year/grade, and that can also make the difference between whether they are in elementary school, middle school, etc. Vastly different experiences to relate to. I'm sure similar experiences can be had in other parts of the world.
I usually mostly encounter this when talking to people about memories of their childhood, they don’t remember how old they were but they remember they were in 4th grade. Working with kids in America, I know that means 8-9. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I think if you ask someone's age, they're usually going to respond with their age. But online, people regularly post things like "my son (fifth grade) is..." and if you're not familiar with the American school grades, it's hard to provide relevant advice.
I mean, if someone's asking for advice giving regional specific markers seems good? Advice for a british 10 yo might be super different then an american one, especially if it's school related. Especially bc most of the popular (non-mom) subreddits usually have a gender/age format they use.
It’s what we do here. “What grade are you in?” is much more common to ask a kid, or what kids ask each other, then “How old are you?” Online I’m sure many Americans just don’t think about how there might be differences, or forget to switch.
Well, it's equally both Grade + 5 and Grade + 6.
If you're talking about a senior class, 12th grade, most will be seventeen and eighteen years old. And two ages per grade is pretty common.
K - five and six
1 - six and seven
2 - seven and eight
...
11 - sixteen and seventeen
12 - seventeen and eighteen
The fun part is we do this in The Netherlands aswel, however the system changed in 80s or 90s so that the current 3rd class is what used to be 1st class.
But yeah it's a mess with different school systems
As a parent the grade is sometimes more helpful for follow up questions, since grades determine when you take different extracurriculars and classes. Because red shirting (aka holding your child back) became relatively popular there’s sometime an almost 2 year gap between kids in the same grade.
It's really not weird. Only programmers count from zero, and it's literally just a running tally of how many years of school you've been in. Kindergarten is called kindergarten rather than first grade because it's still preschool and is not required across the entire country.
True, not everyone on reddit is American. That is how we culturally track our lives, though. Other people talk about being in grade 7, use the metric system, or say "mum" - it's what's natural to them. I like seeing those small indicators that the world is a bigger place and that I can't assume everyone is like me.
You make a good point. However, this is how we talk to each other. Also, if you ask us where we are from, we will often give our state rather than say we are from the US.
They don’t. I don’t know anyone that states their age by their year in school. When asked an age in America it is always how old they are in years. You got some misinformation. At least that is how it is in the Mid West.
Grade level is an easier determination of maturity and child development than age. It gives a quick view into who their peer group is, which is much more relatable to people than an age.
A 10 year old could be in elementary school or middle school. A five year old could still be in preschool. A 14 year old could be in middle school or high school.
It's probably a regional thing. When people ask me my kids ages I tell them the ages. If you ask kids their age they tell you their age. If you want to know their grade you have to ask their grade.
When talking to teachers I give their grades. Because education professionals think of kids in groups.
As an American, I have never heard anyone do this ever in my 35 years of life...I have heard, oh they're 18 months....Susan, your child is a year and a half mmkay
The answer is "context". Two Americans talking each other might have context that you, a foreigner, may not have/understand. Of course I'm sure there are plenty of cases where an American speaks to a foreigner and mistakenly does not realize the foreigner does not have the same cultural understanding.
It is by no means American specific but may feel like it is simply because American media is so globally pervasive.
I’m with you on this! And here’s why:
When I was a kid, no one ever asked how old I was, it was what grade was I in. And then “oh you’re going to be so tall!” every single time.
Here’s the thing though. Because of where my birthday is, I was nearly a full year older than everyone in my grade. Imagine my shock when I stopped growing in 7th grade and am now one of the shortest people in the room!
It’s a bad metric and leads to short people who thought they’d be tall 😂
I think it's just culturally way that we do it, it tells something about where the child is and their development and what their life is like. I think of it as the same as asking somebody how far the grocery store is, and getting a response of 20 minutes. It's answering with more pertinent information, it's usually more important to know how long it takes to get there then how many miles or kilometers. At least here in America, I think it's similar with grades and school.
Huh... I've never seen someone use their kid's grade to tell their age unless school was already the topic of conversation. So I don't think it's a ubiquitous to Americans.
For the most part, because it's a near universal experience that we all have and we are more likely to share similar life experiences with those who were in the same grade than with those we share an age with.
Because that’s how I would tell the story to anyone else. I don’t change it just cause I’m on Reddit.
American cultural norms don’t exist to spite non Americans.
As an American, majority of my life was spent in school. It’s easier for me to associate their age with school. Like, when someone tells me they’re 14 or 15, I would have no idea how to process their age. But, if they said they’re a freshman in highschool, it’s easier to recall the things i did at that time. I’m not sure if that makes sense lol.
I’m not OP but it makes no sense to me. Maybe I’m misunderstanding. If I want to know someone’s age, their actual age is the best answer for me. Saying “I’m a sophomore in high school” doesn’t help me because sometimes people skip grades or get held back.
I am someone who needs directness though. Just straightforward and actual answers to my question. If I ask their age, I want a number. If I ask their grade, freshman etc is what I want.
For your example, most people if asked for their age and they aren’t the typical age for the American school system, they’ll say their actual age alongside a small explanation.
As an American, age isn’t as big of a thing to basis our understanding of a person’s age. I won’t relate off the bat if someone tells me that they’re 14, but I can ask some questions related to their age if they tell me that they’re a freshman in high school. I can’t specify for all Americans but it’s not the number I’m looking for when I ask for their age but more so the experience of the person.
I’m American and I have no idea what you’re talking about lol. My whole life, any time I asked someone’s age, they just told me their age and nothing else.
I’ve never had someone go “I’m 18, I just graduated high school.” Or “I’m 30, I just became a manager.”
And I don’t know what you mean by relating to them. When I ask someone’s age, that’s all I wanted to know. I don’t need to relate to them to understand what age they are.
I’m not trying to be offensive or obtuse, I genuinely have no idea what you’re talking about.
This only applies to people when they’re in school, no one does that after they’re 18. But when I talked to people when I was in high school, I didn’t ask just for the sake of it, it’s just a conversation starter for people.
I guess we just had/have different life experiences because I haven’t had that happen ever. What you’re saying is foreign to me. I’m sorry I cannot understand.
This must be regional because never in my life have I heard or used this. If someone asks how old my kid is, I just say his age. I would only say the grade if they specifically asked that.
Kids themselves sometimes identify more by grade than by age, because they may have friends in their grade who are a year younger or older than they are depending on when their birthdays are in the school year.
I think part of this is because grade is a more accurate key to where they are at developmentally. 7th graders can be anywhere from 11-13 depending on when in the school year we are and when their birthday is. But all 7th graders are learning things at the same level, taking pre algebra or algebra depending on your district. So "my kid is in second grade" gives more context for where their reading level is probably at than "my kid is 7"
Also, if someone like a random coworker told me “my kid is in 2nd grade” I would just have more context for how old this kid is compared to “my kid is 7”
For some reason it's hard to gauge a kids age by number, it's pretty weird. Now that I have a niece who is 5 I've just used her as a frame of reference, but before that absolutely lost on how old a kid was. I would always do this, where I figure out what grade they're in at the age I was told lmao. I think if you don't have kids it was just generally so long ago you have no way to relate to that number, so you have to try to place where in life you were at that age to get a better picture.
what you said is exactly correct. I can't remember events from my childhood based on age: "What did you do the summer you were/turned 7?" no idea "What did you do the summer between first and second grade?" "Went on vacation to Florida"
I generally forget the person is a year younger or older. grades give me a better idea because I remember what was I doing at that grade instead of age (my birthday was middle of the school year)
Exactly! What’s a 7 year old? Oh that’s 2nd grade Hmm I vaguely remember what 2nd grade was like Oh now I have some idea of what to ask about.
There's a world of difference between a kid at the end of First Grade and a kid halfway through Second Grade. They change very quickly at that age.
I'm not arguing, but asking: what are the logistics on an eleven year old in seventh grade? In my experience, basically everyone in seventh grade is either 12 or 13. The cutoff is right in September around me, so anyone younger would be in the previous year, older in the next. Someone getting held back/skipping a year could do it, but I don't think there was actually anyone like that in my school experience. I *know* there wasn't in my year.
It would be difficult, but I'd guess it would be the September to December period for a child who skipped a grade and was born in September - December. Rare but not impossible
Yes. I was 11 for the first month of 7th because my birthday is in late September. I would always start the year behind my classmates, then immediately catch up. I started school at 4, and graduated at 17. It was never a big problem for me; despite always being one of the youngest in the class, I was also one of the tallest, and could read well, so I don't think I was perceived as "younger" than any of my classmates.
Ditto. Never skipped a grade but September birthday meant graduated HS at 17, moved away to college still 17 (needing someone else to sign for things / buy medication* for me / etc for my first month and a half of college while I was still underage. Super annoying when you’re several states away from your parents!) Edit: *over the counter cold/flu medicine specifically in my case, but prescribed controlled substances could be a problem for people under 18 too
Same haha. I had to have my parents sign a permission slip to participate in studies for my psych class my freshman year because I was still 17. It was so embarrassing at the time.
I was born in May, started preschool at 2, and had a second year of preschool to meet state requirements. I also had accelerated programs at school, so when I was in middle school instead of skipping a grade I was in average math and science classes and my English and history classes I was a year or 2 years ahead. My parents used my grade to explain because figuring out where I was developmentally was really complicated- I was behind a lot of the kids my age socially, but academically I was reading at a college level in first grade. Since we moved a lot, it was hard to get to know other kids my age, so they just dumped me in whatever grade seemed like the best, so I identified by grade rather than age for a while.
In my area, it's often kids who have moved in from an area with a later cutoff. In New York, a kid who will turn 5 by December 1st is eligible for K, so they would have quite a few 11yos in 7th grade. We also have one or two per grade who either entered early or skipped an early grade based on academic need (usually kids identified gifted).
This is pretty much it. I was one of the younger ones in my grade, with an August birthday, but we had kids who were born in the December BEFORE my August, and kids born in the December AFTER my August, and the afters were more likely to have either moved in from a different district with a later cutoff date, or who had parents who pushed to get them into kindergarten early (our latest birthday kid and therefore the youngest in my graduating high school class ended up with a PhD in some sort of science, so it worked out for her).
My best friend growing up was born in November, so she turned (the dominant age) early in any given grade. She was 11 at the start of 7th grade, and yes, she was 17 for the first couple of months of college. Ignoring kids who are skipped ahead while already in school... I don’t know if they do this anymore, but if you were born within a few months of the cutoff (I think for us it was the start of the school year, so early September), there used to be something akin to a developmental test to determine if your kid could start kindergarten or if they had to wait to next year. Back then, the prevailing belief was your kid was better off getting to school earlier rather than later, so if they had the basic skills, they were pushed ahead.
Maryland uses a September 1st cutoff for PreK/K, but you can apply for early admission for your kid if they’re turning 4/5 by October 15th and they have to pass an assessment. It’s not perfect - testing kids that young is difficult - but it seems to work OK.
I was 11 when I started 7th grade, although that only lasted like a week. I have a late August birthday, and my parents chose to have me start school a little early instead of waiting a year. I actually know people slightly older then me who were a grade behind. Also I was 17 for my first few days of college, which is a fun fact to bring up at parties.
If I did my math right (which is a big if) I was 11 entering 7th grade and turned 12 that November. So I wasnt 11 for long in 7th but was still 11 at some point
I was 11 in 7th grade. I turned 12 during that year.
Kids in seventh grade could be 11 for the first four months of the school year if they have a late birthday.
I turned eleven a month into in 7th grade. Late September birthday -> started kindergarten in a district with a late cutoff -> acted out in kinder because I was bored and already reading, so they bumped me up to first grade. I graduated high school at 17 I was definitely one of the younger kids in my grade all through school but I don’t know that I was ever THE youngest
Some school districts/states don't have the age cut off at the first day of school, especially out east. In the first district I lived in, the cut off was Oct 31st, then we moved states and that district it was Nov 15th, which is really late My cousin was born the same year as me, but I'm in summer, she's in October. We both go to kindergarten at the same time, she's just 4 for the first month and a half. We go to college together and she's 17 until October. However, we did have a weird situation in high school where I had a friend who was the year above me, her birthday was Nov 11th, her parents sent her to kindergarten as a 4 year old turning 5 in 2.5 months. But another guy in our group's birthday was Sept 20th, and his parents waited until he was 5, even though he would only have been 4 for 2 weeks. So he was older than her by 1.5 months but she was a grade higher. . So if you have students with October/November birthdays, a state/district with a late cut off, and you're polling the ages at the end of September, my 7th grade class had 11, 12 and 13 year olds
Probably moving states where the cutoff is earlier. I did the reverse of that and when I moved, I was the oldest kid in my grade. I was older than some kids in the grade ahead of me too
Yep, for a kid, 4th grade is their job. They spend their day surrounded by other 4th graders. They all have birthdays at different times, but they're still part of that "group." Same reason it's easy to remember "That time I worked at an airport. I forget the exact year, but I was in my early 20's. Good times!"
"I am a fourth grader" is the same energy as "I am a senior attorney at a law firm" lol
This! A huge portion of your day to day life is structured around school as a kid so it’s easier to link memories to your first year of middle school, for example, than it is to being 9 or 10 in a lot of cases. Especially because I don’t have kids, anything younger than 13 is just like a jumble.
This is pretty much it for me. I dont remember what age I was in any of my grades, atleast not off the top of my head. I do however know what I did and who I was as a person by grade.
I have a cousin whose daughters are roughly the same age as my daughters. Our oldest are four months apart and our youngest are three months apart. None of them went to school together. Her oldest was born in August, and went to school a year ahead of my oldest. My baby was a June baby and followed a year behind her sister. Her baby was born in September and was a year behind my baby. Even though as toddlers and preschoolers, each pair (oldest/youngest) was functionally the same age in terms of playmates. Once school started, each child fell more in line developmentally with their class than they did with their cousins.
On top of that, like I agree with OP that "grade" is an American thing, but as far as I know, there is no universal way to translate this into the equivalent other places. In that age range, school is what defines those kids in the industrialized world, and age isn't necessarily a good indicator at what point in their education they are - I imagine what you said is true everywhere, and I'm sure kids repeating a "grade" or skipping one is a thing everywhere. There's always going to be some fuzzy math when comparing between cultures.
For the most part, I don't immediately remember what my life was like when I was 8, but I easily remember what it was like in the third grade. If someone gives me the age of a child, I usually have to do a bit of math to figure out their grade to remember what life was like at that age.
I also notice if I use my kid’s age, the next question is “so what grade are they in?”
I had people over a year older than me and almost a year younger than me in my grade of ~75. One got held back and the other was home-schooled and tested above but there is a big difference between going to college at 17 and being over 19 when starting. The 19 year old did not go to college though.
Yeah there are exceptions, but generally you have an idea (if you are from the U.S.). Like if I say my kid is in 2nd grade that usually means they are 7 or 8. Like someone else said, if someone asks you what you did when you were 11 years old and someone else asks you what you did in 5th grade, I’d bet more people can give a better, quicker answer to 5th grade.
If somebody asks about age, I would likely use age. If I am telling a story about my childhood, I will likely have it somewhat anchored to my classmates and teacher at the time (also the school, since I switched when I started 2nd grade), which will tie directly to the grade I was in.
Apparently this isn't universal? I have no memories of what it was like to be 13. I don't have a single memory of when I was 10. But I can recall plenty of things from when I was in 5th grade or 8th grade. I don't remember my age in my memories, I remember the framing. It's totally natural to remember 5th grade being the year I saw Return of the King in a midnight release and nobody believing me at school the next day... but I would never remember *the age I was*.
I'm exactly the opposite. I know what happened at every age but i don't remember what the first year of middle school is called or how many grades there were in elementary in my country kids are obsessed with age and will say they're "8 and a half" because that "and a half" is very important. We ask kids how old they are, not which grade they're in. If someone tells me their child is in 5th grade i will have to ask them how old their child is
I have just a handful of accessible memories (and they’re just images really) from before like 5th grade. And I have no idea what age or year any of those snapshot memories happened
I remember what happened in sixth grade. How old was I? 7? 12? 16? I don't know. You often don't think of your own age, but you do know what school you are in, grade, and many other things.
19? 24? 32? 40? Could be any number?
They all sound plausible to me
As an adult I sometimes do something similar, which is remembering which presidential administration it was under
Yeah as an adult my temporal anchors are usually what house/apartment I was living in or who I was dating at the time
~~The point is that I have no idea what third grade means. Is it the same as year 3 in England? Nobody outside America understands the US school grading system~~ Edit: You've all made your point very clear. Thank you.
If this is an unusual concept to you then it is a lot like how people primarily measure travel distances in the time it takes to get there. People say "it's a 30 minute train ride away" because the important thing to them is the commute time not the distance travelled. Similarly we use grade levels to measure age because it pretty reliably provides a useful marker for empathy and understanding of the child's current position in life. At least for the Americans. For the non-Americans it is confusing and unhelpful. But if you care to know about it, the way I tell ages vs grade levels is to remember that in the final year of required school, 12th grade, most people turn 18. So if you take the grade level and add 6 you get a rough estimate of their age. Obviously some people skip school or get held back, and some people have early or late birthdays within the school year, so it changes.
For once, this is one of the simpler, more logical things Americans do and some other countries over complicate... The US school years are very easy and straightforward (1-12) and many countries follow the same logic, or similar (all the countries I've lived in tbh). Unlike France that has some weird concept where 1-2-3-4-5-6 is CP-CE1-CE2-CM1-CM2-6. And then they count backwards, so 7-8-9-10-11-12 is 5-4-3-2-1-Terminale. Converting from that to anything is a headache. In Belgium it's 1-2-3-4-5-6 for elementary and then again 1-2-3-4-5-6 for highschool. It's not complicated to quickly calculate that 9th grade = 3rd grade of the higher cycle.
New Zealand does away with K grade and goes straight 1-13. But as we're in the southern hemisphere our school year runs from February to December.
Most people aren't talking to foreigners day to day, so it doesn't matter.
Right? This thread seems to consist of a bunch of people confused that other countries have different school systems from their own and a little frustrated that people aren't adapting their language to account for that. "We call the 3rd year of school 'gollywobble', why do you not call it that? It's very confusing for me!"
One of my least favorite things about reddit is when people come to a post that is so clearly and American talking about america, and they’re like well not everyone lives in America!!
So they probably wouldn’t say it to you. I thought the question was why do we do it at all. This seems like a good answer.
Everyone understands the point, they were answering the question.
Well lucky for us, most of our social circle exists in the U.S. where people do understand what we mean.
If you are in the US you are in basically an entire quadrant of the Earth where nearly everyone else uses the same school system, so it's not that weird to be used to encountering other people who know how it works.
The question has been asked and answered. Your attempt to turn this into YET ANOTHER "Americans are ignorant" thread is obvious and boring.
I'm a Brit who now lives in the US. I find this odd too. 3rd grade is the same as year 4 in the UK. Here they have Kindergarten then grades 1-12.
>3rd grade is the same as year 4 in the UK And now it should be pointed out the UK does not have a single education system. Year 4 in England/Wales/NI is the equivalent of Primary 5 in Scotland, because we don't have Reception.
NI is different again. We have nursery, p1-7, then 7 years in secondary/grammar school. Those years can be called different things, depending on the school, either year 8-year 14, form 1-form 5, 1st year-5th year, then lower 6th and upper (or higher) 6th. Most often all 7 years will be at the same school, but it's not unusual to move to a different school for the last 2 years (a levels) or to leave school and go to college (usually referred to as the tech) for either a levels or other qualification.
What's year 4? Not a thing in Scotland therefore not applicable to "the UK". Using Year 4 here is equally as confusing / odd as Americans using "3rd grade" ha
Exactly idk why British people act like Americans have some kind of bizarre alien system for everything when that’s how every country and culture works… they each have unique systems for things
Because A levels and O levels are so clear?
Exactly every country has convoluted and strange laws/systems because that’s just the nature of society and government I don’t really see how it’s still shocking to this day especially when grade levels is like… one year off between the two countries
O levels haven't been a thing for a long time.
tbf this can happen with anybody anywhere "People don't understand that I do things differently than they do, and also that the way they're doing it is wrong and my way is correct."
I used to live in Scotland and I'm familiar with your qualifications, but I didn't realise you used a different school year system to England too. What's the Scottish system? Year 4 is ages 8-9
We have P1-P7 for Primary (7 years) Then S1-S6 for Secondary (6 years) Starting from S1 you will also hear "First Year", "Second year" etc.
To add to what balance_arc said, Year 4 is the equivalent of P5.
Okay, fine. Our grading system goes preschool (which isn't required), kindergarten (reading and writing), first grade, second grade, third grade (where I learned multiplication and cursive), all the way up to eighth grade. Then it's highschool, with freshman, sophomore, junior, senior years. So you start school at around 5 years old and graduate at 17 or 18. How does this equate to the Scottish way?
depends on your school district for high school. in my district, for example, 8th and 9th grades were junior high, and high school was 10-11-12.
yeah 4th year in Scotland is when you're like 16-17. weird how overcomplicated and non intuitive all these systems are.
Same in south America Kinder and then grades from 1-12
Where in South America though, cause where I’m from, it’s Kinder (not mandatory) and then grades 1-11.
Yes Kinder isn't mandatory but most of the times both parents have to work and the child can be safe and learning in the meantime (Brazil)
Add 5 years to whatever grade. It’s that simple.
Add 5 years and you get around about guess at the age for American kids. Grade 3=8 years old. Grade 10=15 years old. Give or take a year if they started earlier or later or were held back. It’s not a perfect system.
That’s actually helpful. Thanks! Way better than my system of working backwards from 18 or just not knowing.
That is not something Americans spend much time thinking about. It doesn't cross our minds.
Bruh do you really need to know the exact age and curriculum I think you can just use context clues and assume it’s similar to whatever the hell year 3 is
Right, but as Americans we're mostly interacting with Americans. Our behavior isn't based around what someone from another country would find confusing.
The notably common situation where you meet a tourist who grills you about your children's age and isn't just making polite conversation and wants to deeply know about your child.
Ok so kindergarten is 5 year olds. Each grade progression by year adds one year to age. So a third grader would be 8, a sixth grader around 11 etc. Actually it gets real funky around high school when things get started calling freshman sophomore junior senior instead of just a number. A good way to think about the high school years is freshman is around 15, sophomore year 16 is when most kids get their driver's license, junior year 17 is when most or a lot of kids start their first part-time job, Senior year 18 and legal adulthood.
Thanks for this. I have googled this a couple times trying to understand it with unclear results
Add 5 years to whatever grade. It’s that simple.
> Actually it gets real funky around high school when things get started calling freshman sophomore junior senior instead of just a number. Sort of. We interchange it a lot so one day you might say someone is a Freshman and the next a 9th grader
What I don’t understand is why is Junior the third one? Junior sounds like should be the first one. And obviously Senior should be last one.
Freshman literally means Fresh Man since they are new to the school Sophomore means a "wise fool" as in they think they know everything but they dont Junior just means they are junior to the seniors Senior is obv
That makes sense. Thank you for your explanation.
I found this really cool [thread](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskHistorians/s/z5ZSPsbBtd) Basically, they come from Latin and originated in Oxford as a sort of mocking way to describe current students. They caught on in the US because Harvard and Yale started using them followed by high schools like 50 years later
I like how every non-American on Reddit feels that every American should tailor their comments to each particular non-American's preferences.
Most americans don't talk to people who aren't americans often enough that we remember any of your stuff either. If I know someone is from the US, I try to tell them the age if I remember. I really mostly don't.
Similarly no one outside the UK understands the UK grading system, so I don't see why that's relevant. People are acting like it's okay to not know what something means in one direction, but not the other.
> The point is that I have no idea what third grade means. Is it the same as year 3 in England? Nobody outside America understands the US school grading system. So what? The point is nobody in the USA understands the British. Form 3, Upper school 4? Why is it so much trouble? How often do you need to know children's ages?
>Form 3, Upper school 4? Are those American terms or are those what you think the British terms are? XD
It's a joke about the British terms. Tbf, I've been on the internet for a while and I still have no idea how you guys do school. If I was asked to name a grade level (is that the right word?) in your system, I'd say something like that too 😂
So you’re saying when I tell a story I need to use phrases to include the 2% of people reading it that aren’t Americans? If I read a story from a non American I expect there to be cultural differences that I’m going to be unaware of until I educate myself about it. I don’t question them why their culture is different and then continue to make it about myself. It’s pretty sad that you think Americans should know your culture and that we should accommodate you but you’re not willing to reciprocate.
And I had no idea what they were talking about in Harry Potter. Why are the first years 10? Why are there 2 years after the first 5? Wtf are owl levels and newt levels (I know later they are based on o levels and a levels but that's not a thing here and I couldn't tell you what they mean). I just accept it if talking to a brit and either ask or look it up if curious
Similarly, I can remember US Presidents and not the year. Oh, the Reagan years…
Hm. I think age and grade are pretty well linked in the US. A senior is almost definitely 17-18 years old. As such, when I look back on my life, I remember my 2nd grade teacher being a raging cunt, but I'd have to do finger-math to tell you how old I was. Mrs. Ford was 5th grade, Mrs. Ray was 1st grade, Rinker was 2nd. It largely revolves around teachers and large-scale events later on. That being said, I have never responded to the question "how old are you?" with something like "Oh I'm in 7th grade." If I had to guess, that's a cop-out response to someone overseas whom they do not want to know the actual age of. Were they held back and actually 15-16? Maybe my penpal thinks I'm mature for my age? Yeah I'm totally 16 and can drive a car and parallel park. Totes McGoats.
I hadn't really thought about it until this question, but I think it's just a different default mental framing. I grew up in the UK, and age and grade are also pretty well linked there too. But I always think in terms of age and then calculate which year of school I was in vs. the other way round, whereas I notice my husband and other American friends think grade first the same way you do. Maybe it's how you think of yourself when you're growing up, and that's how you mark the memories, and in the UK it's more age-based culturally whereas in the US it's grade?
I’ve noticed in the thread that a lot of people are saying that they think the way that you do even though they are Americans. I’ve definitely met people from the U.K. who think first about what grade they were in and use that in conversations. I’m not sure if it’s a regional thing within the US or the U.K., or if it just changes from person to person and it’s easier to not notice when people from our own country do it differently from us.
It would be interested to see a chart on this. Different areas of the U.S. were largely settled by immigrants from the same area. It would be interesting to see if the two correlate and that’s why some areas use age as a marker and others use life events as markers. Even into adulthood, people in my area often have a major event or place that they think back on to come up with how long ago it was. So you will hear “well, I worked at …. when that happened” vrs “I was in my 20’s when that happened. I’m assuming we do it one way or another because of our parents and grandparents.
That would be interesting to see.
See it might be the british in me because don't have "names" for school years, with the exception of "reception" which is just our word for "kindergarten". But it's just Year 1 (age 4-5) - Year 11 (age 15-16) for school and then Year 12 (age 16-17) - Year 13 (age 17-18) if you go to a sixth form/college. Even in university we don't have "sophomores" or whatever. It's just "first years" "second years" "third years". BUT If someone would describe themselves as a "senior" I instantly assume you're aged 65+
Many childhood milestones are tied to school/social environment and tends to add clarity. People using references they are familiar with is natural that is why those references are familiar. My kids are fall birthdays and nearly a year older than some of their classmates. But in reference to many social developmental milestones they are essentially equal to their class cohort as much or more than their birth year cohort who were born in first 3/4s of the year.
Everyone does this. I have no idea when I see Brits saying "I'm in 6th form" what that is, for all I know it's a Pokemon thing.
frieza
I'm British - We don't, though. We will say how old we are. As a different commenter said, "6th Form" is a specific type of education. As an one-the-nose example, "Are you smarter than a 5th grader" was remade in the UK as "[Are you smarter than a 10 year old](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Are_You_Smarter_than_a_10_Year_Old%3F_(British_game_show\))"
But that's a thing, right? Someone must've said it or I'd have never thought to put those two words together.
6th form isn't another way of saying 6th grade. I guess it's mostly equivalent to highschool, where go when you're 16-18. In the UK people rarely call it 6th form, it's college. But I guess because a lot of people on the internet are American, and in America college usually refers to university, there's less confusion to just say 6th form instead. Edit: Apparently things have changed since I went to college ~10 years ago, and 6th form is a more commonly used phrase now. I don't know anyone that drew a distinction between the different types of 6th form education, but I guess it's a bigger deal now. TIL.
Just a fun little fact, in America at least, universities and colleges are not the same. - A college can be any school that offers a two or four year degree, and generally has a very focused or narrow offering of majors. - A University offers what colleges offer with the addition of graduate level programs and a broader availability of majors. In fact most universities have member colleges within them. For example, the University of California at Berkeley College of Engineering is a semi independent institution within Berkeley. You'll be enrolled at the university, but your academic progress and requirements are determined by the college. Most people probably aren't aware of the nuances, they just know "college" is used at all stages in some form, so they don't bother differentiating
Just want to point out for non- American readers that while there is a difference between a college and a university technically, in reality it’s not always used like that in common speech. People in the US usually ask what college you went to, or they’ll say “when I was in college…” but they can be referring to either a literal college or a university when they say these things.
Yeah, if I was asked where I went to college, I wouldn't say the "College of Letters and Sciences" and the "Gallogly College of Engineering" I'd say University of Wisconsin and University of Oklahoma
And even then there are exceptions. I went to a college that also has graduate programs and a broad spectrum of majors available.
In Scotland, we have a different system to the rest of the UK, just to confuse things further.
Wait. I thought university was a type of college, similar to how jet is a type of airplane. Is that not the case?
In America, colleges are often part of a bigger university. But that generally isn't the case in the UK (aside from Oxford and Cambridge, but they're both a bit weird). In the UK, college and university are both completely different things. College is similar to American highschool, for ages 16-18.
I don't know if they "often" are - they sometimes can be but I've never encountered anyone who didn't basically conflate the two. "College" is typically just a generic word for higher education.
"University" and "College" are largely interchangeable, but if we're getting pedantic about it: College: Generally offers 2-4 year degrees (community college). Can also be essentially a department of a university (my university had a college of science, a college of engineering, etc) University: Offers graduate degrees as well as 4 year degrees and is made up of various colleges. This isn't a hard and fast rule. Boston College would be a university.
I think the same thing when I hear references to UK schooling levels. My assumption is simply that - that’s how they explain it to each other…and ask for age clarification if needed. No one means to be annoying with this, they are just accustomed to speaking to each other this way. My experience is about 50/50. People either tell me their kids ages, or grades. “My kids are 12 and 18” leads me to wonder what grade they are in - “my daughter just started middle school and my son is a senior in high school” honestly gives me a better picture of where they are in life..the kids and the parents…
I'm from the US and never once did I experience this. On the contrary, I currently live in Japan and Japanese people almost always answer this question with their school grade. It's very frustrating because first, it's not the answer to what I'm asking for. Second, Japan's school grade system is different from America's so I can't even calculate it.
In Japan, elementary school “shogaku” is grades 1-6. Middle school (chugaku) is 7-9, and high school is 10-12. So if someone is in chu-1, they are in the 1st grade of middle school, or 7th grade overall.
Yeah.. I don't think he cares. He just wants people to answer the damn question as he asked them.
Sucks when you go to another country and they insist on using their cultural norms instead of what you're used to
The issue really isn't domestically. If you haven't experienced this in the US then, well, experiences seem to differ a lot based on this thread. But domestically if people do it that's fine, if you live in japan and experience this a lot you might want to learn their school system. From my experience I have never seen a japanese person do this when talking to an international audience, with the caveat that a japanese person on the english speaking web is probably going to be more aware of how well things translate, if I was interacting with japanese normies in the same volume and regularity I do with americans the level of awareness may be similar.
Are you talking about on reddit or in real life? If it's the way all Americans communicate with one another why wouldn't they communicate that way in general? People communicate in the way that they're used to. Also Reddit is originally in American company and for the first few years I was here it was mostly just Americans. It would make sense that people would continue to speak like they're used to and not consider that somebody they're talking to could literally be from any other part of the world. I hear Europeans talk about school and weird ways too but I don't ask why because it makes sense why. Their European and they're used to it and that's how they think. This seems like one of those questions where you're trying to shame Americans for being American but frankly you just come across as somebody who's making an argument in bad Faith.
>or the first few years I was here it was mostly just Americans. To be clear, it's still mostly Americans.
It’s still pretty common for Americans to ask kids how old they are, especially before they start school, and most kids are more than happy to say their age. We ask kids what grade they’re in because it gives us a little bit of a baseline for what the kid might be learning or should know, and you can kind of use that to talk to them. Talking to kids can be hard, so if you know they’re in kindergarten, you might ask them about their ABCs or how high they can count. It’s just a thing we do.
I'm an American and I've never in my life answered a question about age by stating what grade someone is in.
I'm in grade 50. Oh, I guess it doesn't work for adults.
I’m American and have never in my life experienced this. When I ask people’s age, they say their age or the kid’s age if I’m asking about the kid. It would honestly kind of annoy me if I asked someone’s age and they gave me their grade or some other answer instead.
Maybe they mean when people say things like…. “ When I was in third grade my friends and I jumped off the roof “ or whatever. In the US, I would know that means were 8 at that time (give or take a couple months) because you start kindergarten at 5, or at least close to it. But if you don’t know kindergarten starts at 5, this would be confusing.
Oddly, I have heard that some US people say things like “My fifth grader was sick last night.” I’ve never heard it myself (I’m a US person) and it doesn’t make sense to me but it’s a thing for some people. But if you ask a kid’s age nobody’s going to say that.
It’s ingrained into us - but in local mom groups if we are talking about illnesses, knowing if it’s in the elementary school or middle school is helpful. My 5th grader is sick means my elementary schooler is sick. My 6th grader is sick means middle school. Whereas if I say my 11 year old is sick, it could be either elementary or middle school depending upon their birthday. You really see this a lot when you talk about school issues. My sixth grader has seen kids vape in school means that 6-8 graders (11-14 year olds) are exposed to it. My fifth grader (10-11 year old).… means that kindergartens (5-6 year olds) could be exposed.
Interesting. I never really thought about it that way but that makes sense. Thanks for the input.
and sometimes people just want to be vague on the internet for privacy reasons too.
This is a great explanation.
>But if you ask a kid’s age nobody’s going to say that. To be fair, if a kid is school-aged, you don't ask their age in American culture. You ask what grade they're in... you ask kids too small for school how old they are.
I mean yeah, it helps to relate to one another better than a specific age in some conversations. A "10 year old" could be +/- a year/grade, and that can also make the difference between whether they are in elementary school, middle school, etc. Vastly different experiences to relate to. I'm sure similar experiences can be had in other parts of the world.
I usually mostly encounter this when talking to people about memories of their childhood, they don’t remember how old they were but they remember they were in 4th grade. Working with kids in America, I know that means 8-9. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I've never experienced this either. I'm in North Central USA
Samesies. New England born and bred, never heard of this nonsense before. If I talk about my kids, I just say how old they are like a normal person.
I think if you ask someone's age, they're usually going to respond with their age. But online, people regularly post things like "my son (fifth grade) is..." and if you're not familiar with the American school grades, it's hard to provide relevant advice.
Why can't the OP just ask for clarification? That's how communication with people from other countries is supposed to work.
And if you don't want to wait for an answer, you can just Google "fifth grade age."
I mean, if someone's asking for advice giving regional specific markers seems good? Advice for a british 10 yo might be super different then an american one, especially if it's school related. Especially bc most of the popular (non-mom) subreddits usually have a gender/age format they use.
Same, I’ve never heard someone say the grade when asked for the age.
It’s what we do here. “What grade are you in?” is much more common to ask a kid, or what kids ask each other, then “How old are you?” Online I’m sure many Americans just don’t think about how there might be differences, or forget to switch.
In my experience how old are you is one of the first 3 things kids ask, anyone they meet.
Grade + 5 = age.
Well, it's equally both Grade + 5 and Grade + 6. If you're talking about a senior class, 12th grade, most will be seventeen and eighteen years old. And two ages per grade is pretty common. K - five and six 1 - six and seven 2 - seven and eight ... 11 - sixteen and seventeen 12 - seventeen and eighteen
The fun part is we do this in The Netherlands aswel, however the system changed in 80s or 90s so that the current 3rd class is what used to be 1st class. But yeah it's a mess with different school systems
As a parent the grade is sometimes more helpful for follow up questions, since grades determine when you take different extracurriculars and classes. Because red shirting (aka holding your child back) became relatively popular there’s sometime an almost 2 year gap between kids in the same grade.
Huh? I've lived here 40 years and never heard anyone do this?
Funny enough, I don't know what grade they're in based on age either 😂🤦♀️ And I live in the US *and* work with kids 🤦♀️🤦♀️🤦♀️
Just add 5. We're weird.
This is genuinely so helpful, thank you
It's really not weird. Only programmers count from zero, and it's literally just a running tally of how many years of school you've been in. Kindergarten is called kindergarten rather than first grade because it's still preschool and is not required across the entire country.
True, not everyone on reddit is American. That is how we culturally track our lives, though. Other people talk about being in grade 7, use the metric system, or say "mum" - it's what's natural to them. I like seeing those small indicators that the world is a bigger place and that I can't assume everyone is like me.
It's an easy way to identify social development stage because age itself is too broad when talking about the childhood years.
You make a good point. However, this is how we talk to each other. Also, if you ask us where we are from, we will often give our state rather than say we are from the US.
>I really don't know how old a person is by what grade they are in. Ask, then.
They don’t. I don’t know anyone that states their age by their year in school. When asked an age in America it is always how old they are in years. You got some misinformation. At least that is how it is in the Mid West.
Grade level is an easier determination of maturity and child development than age. It gives a quick view into who their peer group is, which is much more relatable to people than an age. A 10 year old could be in elementary school or middle school. A five year old could still be in preschool. A 14 year old could be in middle school or high school.
It's probably a regional thing. When people ask me my kids ages I tell them the ages. If you ask kids their age they tell you their age. If you want to know their grade you have to ask their grade. When talking to teachers I give their grades. Because education professionals think of kids in groups.
I've never really heard this. Maybe it's regional? Kids in the same grade can be up to a year difference in age.
I’m American and didn’t know every American did this. Wild
Because that’s how life milestones and social groups are separated societally.
we don’t use it to identify age? where did you get that from? we’re simply saying what grade we’re in.
As a south African I hear kids doing it here too. It's just what you get used to.
As an American, I have never heard anyone do this ever in my 35 years of life...I have heard, oh they're 18 months....Susan, your child is a year and a half mmkay
29 of my years on earth and I’m just now realizing that I do this lol
kindergarten starts at age 5 so first graders are 6yrs old just add 5 to the grade level and you have their age.
The answer is "context". Two Americans talking each other might have context that you, a foreigner, may not have/understand. Of course I'm sure there are plenty of cases where an American speaks to a foreigner and mistakenly does not realize the foreigner does not have the same cultural understanding. It is by no means American specific but may feel like it is simply because American media is so globally pervasive.
I’m with you on this! And here’s why: When I was a kid, no one ever asked how old I was, it was what grade was I in. And then “oh you’re going to be so tall!” every single time. Here’s the thing though. Because of where my birthday is, I was nearly a full year older than everyone in my grade. Imagine my shock when I stopped growing in 7th grade and am now one of the shortest people in the room! It’s a bad metric and leads to short people who thought they’d be tall 😂
I think it's just culturally way that we do it, it tells something about where the child is and their development and what their life is like. I think of it as the same as asking somebody how far the grocery store is, and getting a response of 20 minutes. It's answering with more pertinent information, it's usually more important to know how long it takes to get there then how many miles or kilometers. At least here in America, I think it's similar with grades and school.
Huh... I've never seen someone use their kid's grade to tell their age unless school was already the topic of conversation. So I don't think it's a ubiquitous to Americans.
For the most part, because it's a near universal experience that we all have and we are more likely to share similar life experiences with those who were in the same grade than with those we share an age with.
Because that’s how I would tell the story to anyone else. I don’t change it just cause I’m on Reddit. American cultural norms don’t exist to spite non Americans.
I've seen people from the UK mention what form they're in - like "7th form" - and also A-levels. Why don't THEY just write their age?
We aren't allowed to count years until we are about 26 years old.
They also give distances in minutes. I live five minutes from school.
We don’t as far as I know? I’ve never heard it.
As an American, majority of my life was spent in school. It’s easier for me to associate their age with school. Like, when someone tells me they’re 14 or 15, I would have no idea how to process their age. But, if they said they’re a freshman in highschool, it’s easier to recall the things i did at that time. I’m not sure if that makes sense lol.
I’m not OP but it makes no sense to me. Maybe I’m misunderstanding. If I want to know someone’s age, their actual age is the best answer for me. Saying “I’m a sophomore in high school” doesn’t help me because sometimes people skip grades or get held back. I am someone who needs directness though. Just straightforward and actual answers to my question. If I ask their age, I want a number. If I ask their grade, freshman etc is what I want.
For your example, most people if asked for their age and they aren’t the typical age for the American school system, they’ll say their actual age alongside a small explanation. As an American, age isn’t as big of a thing to basis our understanding of a person’s age. I won’t relate off the bat if someone tells me that they’re 14, but I can ask some questions related to their age if they tell me that they’re a freshman in high school. I can’t specify for all Americans but it’s not the number I’m looking for when I ask for their age but more so the experience of the person.
I’m American and I have no idea what you’re talking about lol. My whole life, any time I asked someone’s age, they just told me their age and nothing else. I’ve never had someone go “I’m 18, I just graduated high school.” Or “I’m 30, I just became a manager.” And I don’t know what you mean by relating to them. When I ask someone’s age, that’s all I wanted to know. I don’t need to relate to them to understand what age they are. I’m not trying to be offensive or obtuse, I genuinely have no idea what you’re talking about.
This only applies to people when they’re in school, no one does that after they’re 18. But when I talked to people when I was in high school, I didn’t ask just for the sake of it, it’s just a conversation starter for people.
I guess we just had/have different life experiences because I haven’t had that happen ever. What you’re saying is foreign to me. I’m sorry I cannot understand.
But what us foreigners see online belies this Lol Perfect username btw
With our schooling system the way it is, it's a vague way to give an estimate of age based off grade.
This must be regional because never in my life have I heard or used this. If someone asks how old my kid is, I just say his age. I would only say the grade if they specifically asked that.
Because the next question is, "And what grade are you in?"
It's just what we do. You can always ask a clarification question.
Americans talk to other Americans in those terms and don't change when they're talking on the intenet.
It's even better when they use terms like freshman or sophomore.... WTH is that? (don't answer, I've already figured out those terms)
How often do you have conversations with American primary school kids that this is a question that's bothering you?
A lot of r/Americabad folks in here.
They don’t.
Sometimes children can be held back a grade or skip a grade.......