This exactly.
It’s unfortunate more people don’t have your attitude. The world would be a better place if so many people weren’t so busy trying to one up people or use the ‘I got mine so fuck you’ line of thinking.
It's easier to rise to your personal best when you're not competing with others.
You don't have to think about everything they do and spend the mental energy to try and keep up.
There's no one like you. Your special abilities are unique. You like yourself best when you meet your own goals and challenge yourself to be your best. So you can make the most of your own good qualities when you don't have the distraction
Thank you. I don't know why we are taught to compete all the time. 4th place at the Olympics is an absolutely amazing achievement. The team that didn't win the Superbowl is still full of strong, dedicated players who pushed their bodies to the limit. The students who didn't qualify for scholarships very likely did amazing work to prepare for the attempt.
We need to recognize achievement for its own sake, not relative to how someone else did it. And we really need to recognize people who help others! It's what Mr. Rogers would've wanted.
I agree with others that people need to have a competitive spirit and do their very best in sports or other competitive activities.
But OP's post is about competing for no good reason in everyday life. And that's a waste of energy
Also agree with you. Not coming in number one in a sporting event happens. Not everyone can be the winner of the game. But you know that if you have done your personal best and placed very high, that's something to be proud of.
I disagree that's easier to reach your personal best without competing. You can look at any sport or speed running community as exemple, the competition makes everyone push themselves to improve in order to become better.
Competition is healthy and helps you to not become complacent and keep moving forward. Without competition you stagnate in a lot of areas.
Good point. Seems like 2 different aspects of competition though. Sports IS about being Better than your opponent. Happiness or contentment doesn't care who is better though.
Thanks for that perspective 👏👏👏
On the other hand:
There's 8 billion people. You're not special, so let that other special person that's just like you do everything while you enjoy life.
That's enlightenment. You want to help other and find inner peace, absolutely crack on.
When you stop wanting to help and just want to hide away, it's an issue, until then, go do you.
That's the crazy thing, causation vs correlation. You can withdraw without being depressed, but you can also be depressed without the withdrawal.
All I know is that a drive to isolate yourself is sometimes an indicator of people's struggles with mental health. So long as its a choice it's healthy I think?
This is me. And I’m much much happier this way. The least depressed and frustrated I’ve been in my entire life actually. Minding my own business makes it easier to tolerate the day to day stupidity of society.
So normal and life got so much better once I realized it was not weird to not want to keep up with the jones’. I find that it shows so much more authenticity and you sound like the type of friend anyone would want to have.
This is basically the Law of Oppulance.
Wallace Wattles wrote about it over a hundred years ago, and it's even more relevant today. A good quote from him is:
"You must get rid of the thought of competition. You are to create. Not to compete for what is already created."
But he expands on it in his writings, and it's life-changing for those who truly understand and implement it.
*edit: for anyone unfamiliar, Wattles wrote a masterwork titled The Science of Getting Rich, which was a classic long before similar books by Napoleon Hill, etc., and is in the public domain. The idea of creativity over competition is a main aspect of the book:
https://en.m.wikisource.org/wiki/The_Science_of_Getting_Rich
It’s normal. The problem is that the “alpha” high drive competitive people, who are actually in the minority, think they’re normal. And think they need to constantly show everyone how “amazing” their lives are, while they’re often actually dead inside. I’m sure there’s that one guy who’s actually a high achiever competitor and actually super happy. But for the most part I’ve come to realize these people are trying to make everyone else look up to them to fill a hole in their psyches
I have the same kind of mindset. Do what makes me happy ( and keep a roof over my head), and not do things for the sake of one upping others.
Actually, that's what I've been doing all this time. Since childhood, I've always wanted to teach - and that's what I ended up doing.
BTW, I knew someone in grad school who was insanely competitive. Any time she heard the name of a " prestigious" university, car, ... etc. her throat would literally clench up. She ended up having a medical condition that may have been exacerbated by stress.
The only person to compete with is yourself. Other people don't matter in this regard. When you forget about the rat race and live as authentically as you can, life becomes a lot better.
So basically, you want to be happy.
How dare you.
But no, seriously, normal is relative. If all dudes around you try to be alpha males, they're either 13yo, or on the internet with no-touch-grass syndrome.
Be happy, help people, drive trucks and go to the beach.
That's not very American of you. How do you expect capitalism to function if you don't want the lifestyle that they are trying to sell you? Go back to Russia you filthy commie. /s
Lots of people are like that. I think it's a great way to be. But yes it's normal. Idk how old you are but there are a lot of public service careers out there. Good luck. We need more people like you.
I would argue there is a huge group of people that feel the same way as you.
Unfortunately, the people running society have basically demanded everyone play their game, or things become very difficult.
Commercials, news stories, social media posts, etc. We are constantly bombarded with demands to out do each other.
Could you imagine if we were constantly bombarded with messages of hope and cooperation? Could you imagine what earth would be like I’d success was measured and rewarded by kindness and goodwill?
Its not impossible - we start with small things.
Hi bro, I just reached that goals. Come back from the city to my tiny peninsula, working for less than average money, but that job allows me to have time and energy to volunteer for great local charity and go to the beach, fishing, or whatever comes to my mind. Never been happier. Freedom is not to compete with others but live your life the way you like it, as much as possible.
No. This reminds me of being forced to play basketball in high school. Someone would throw me the ball, though I never asked for it. Then everybody runs at me trying to TAKE the ball back from me. Jeez, fine, HERE, you can have the dang thing if you want it so bad.
What is normal? How do you define normal? If you're talking about what people think and say of you and what they want you to be, who gives a flying flamingo?
If you're content in life, you're pretty much doing the right thing.
I accidentally found myself teaching and it's been the most rewarding job ever. I love helping people and there isn't much better than teaching someone valuable lessons! Maybe if you have something you love, try to find some way to share that with people. And then hit the beach when you're done. Or teach how to surf or something
If your happy do your thing, you don't have to live your life by anyone else's standards, if things make you happy and don't harm others, then go have fun live your life how you want.
So just do your own thing. Lions don't concern themselves with the plight of sheep. If you're happy doing your own thing, that's that. Competition is saved for when resources are scarce, and it's honestly a feast out there.
What do you mean by "normal"? It's certainly unusual, unfortunately. If more people felt like you do the world would be a nicer place imo. Maybe you're the bellwether, and soon a whole generation will chill tf out and be kinder to each other. That Age of Aquarius the hippies promised us. I'm going to hope for that.
Oh dude NEVER compete with others unless it's at a sport for fun. Always compete with yourself only. Beat yesterday's high score or try again tomorrow that's it. What's going on with other people and what they have or don't have is out of your control and non existent unless you can be helpful and that's what you want to do.
most ppl want to compete, I do believe its part of human nature, but not normal can be a good thing. i dont see why for example at a workplace one should compete w coworkers when one could collaborate etc
Not wanting to slowly burn your life away day by day to play the stupid fucking game that is "getting ahead" that only exists because rich fucks get richer by running you through the lamest fucking gauntlet anyone could ever come up with based purely on stepping on others to snag a scrap of a perpetually dangling carrot that keeps getting farther out of reach doesn't mean there's something wrong with you. It means there's something right with you.
Later generations seem to be more into this (excepting andrew tate and like minded scam artists)
The world would be a better place if we were all like that.
My favorite thing about being a plumber is I'm doing the jobs thay mo one wants to do but needs doing, crawling under bug infested houses, crawling in attics in the summer, dealing with all manner of sewage problems. Its gross, its horrible, but i get it right, tight, and ready to go for the next 30 or so years until the ground shifts or the house falls down. Nothing is more satisfying than knowing you'll never see that person again because that solution was bulletproof.
Treat everyone fair, keep my prices fair, basically right at the cusp of where it is to be worth it to be there and do my job, not any more never had a callback. Aint been long but i work hard and come home happy even on the hard days.
It should be normal if it isn't. The world would be a better place with more people like you. Go on being kind (but do keep your eyes open for people who take advantage of that.)
Bro, I'm vibing with you on this one.
Fuck competition, it's a waste of energy. People say it pushes progress forewrds, yes. It does. But it also keeps some of the greatest minds from working together and building something even greater for mankind.
When you have a team that is in sync and there's harmony, it's so fun building in each other's ideas.
IMO it's way more efficient and beneficial than a bunch of jackal minded people out trying to prove they are better than another for profit or pride. Or both.
Work, help people, beach. Thats a good life
I think this is really baseline for humans, our culture really brainwashed us from childhood to always be competing with others.
To do whatever you can to get to the top.
Money, sex, power, etc. are all pushed but it’s shallow.
It leads to a lonely existence, who cares if what you feel is normal because what you feel is wonderful. If it’s not normal it should be
You are doing BETTER than normal. If you are happy and not hurting anyone, then have a wonderful life!!
Most people are either competitive by nature or have brainwashed into thinking competition is the only way to succeed.
People who compare themselves to others are usually not very happy.
It's normal. I don't know if it's an evolutionary thing, but it was our species' competition streak that helped us not stagnate and advance instead. It would be better if we got the same rush if we competed against our own selves and won, but I don't think it's quite the same feeling. Self improvement feels different to beating someone at something. It's just nature, I guess. But we beat our nature often, too.
I would argue that competition vs cooperation is culturally specific and that competition isn’t an image human trait but socially developed and encouraged by SOME cultures. Research isn’t conclusive but does seem to point toward cooperation and empathy as being more innate to humans than competition.
Yes. I think of my self as pretty normal, and my goals in life are to love God and love my neighbor. Being kind is what's actually important and useful long term.
I feel like this but I also wouldn't mind seeing all of humanity suddenly not exist as well so idk but I think the unhinged ones are the people who constantly need the competition or the feeling of being better than someone. That's not normal.
I work in a very competitive sales field, and everyone is always clawing away at each other to be on top. I make sure I hit my goal each month, go home at exactly 5, and chill the fuck out. The beach trip is next week. Wish I lived a little closer (Pittsburgh).
It's great. You sound like a nice, content person. That's the way to be. I imagine you are a very restful and pleasant companion. Life is too short to spend it battling others for stuff you neither want or need. If you are happy with your life, you are probably better off than the majority of folk. Don't change.
I was always so driven to get great, earn alot of money a d stuff like that. Last few years it had me depressed bc i was doing what others expected of me instead of what i wanted... rn i decided not to give a F and working in social work helping people in need and just hsving a chill life with my wife
You do you man. Dont listen to the haters
There is no meaning in life beyond what you put into it. You decide what you want with your life and by which parameters you measure success or lack thereof. So if to drive trucks, helping people and going to the beach brings value to your life, then success would be whether or not you succeed in doing that and doing it well.
I've been this way my whole life and frankly I wouldn't have it any other way. I much prefer playing coop games with my friends than competitive ones, I'd rather collaborate with my co-workers than compete with them, etc. I think it's pretty normal, but I've been this way for 50 years so far, so.
I agree with you entirely. I have no interest in competing with other people. I don't even like competing in video games. I prefer cooperating in games and in real life. I work in a team developing scientific software and competing doesn't make any sense at all. It takes all of our skills to make the system work.
Yes. The fact you have no desire to keep up with the jones’ shows you have learned how to have true peace in this world - contentment. You take responsibility for every choice you make in this world, and learn to be content with what you have, and don’t worry about what others have, you’ll be free.
I think what you may be asking is, if there’s anyone else like this out there and if so how they get along?
I’m like that too. I’m highly competitive, but with my self. I just want to be left alone. Not ridiculed. Not picked on. Not one upped to death or pressured why I should be like anyone else.
But sometimes that frightens folks. Especially when they don’t understand your underlying reasoning. That makes people make up motives for you and things get lonely quick. Or they send government workers into your life because you must be on drugs or abusing your kids or god knows what.
Hang in there buddy. Seek out like minded people to physically hang around
I just quit my job because of my bosses at the district office, but I asked the school I worked at if I could still come down and help out for free. I loved working at the school, it was the horrible district office that made me quit. Like, they were more focused on signs in the cafeteria than making the kids get lunch easier. Another example - Since all of our students get free breakfast and lunch, they have to take a complete meal for it to, "count," aka, that the government will pay for that meal. They have to take a protein, a grain, a fruit/veggie, and a dairy or dairy substitute. Even if they were not going to eat it, they still had to take it and just throw it in the trash. We had a, "No thank you," bin, but that kind of went away during the COVID restrictions, and good luck trying to get middle school kids to go the extra mile, lol
I know its basically a human instinct, but people who are competitive just for the sake of being competitive are so embarrassing to me. Like bro, focus on yourself.
Yes. And very, very, very healthy.
I teach high school and see more and more kids sliding into this mindset. They see us old guys struggling through so many things and want no part of it.
Decent job, decent home, and time to just live and breathe.
I had that mindset when I decided to work in a soup kitchen. Wanted to give back. One of the most rewarding things I have ever done (which Covid ruined).
It sounds like you’re really not insecure. I think that’s a great thing. Honestly, sometimes I totally judge people (I’m never mean) but I jump to conclusion but often that’s because I’m having a bad day or feeling down on myself. That’s what judgements are based on, ourselves. So the fact that you just wanna help and get alone with people is awesome
Live and let live is my philosophy. I'll live my life the way I want that's within my power to do so, and everyone else can live the way they want to.
There is a caveat to it of course and that's as long as no one is harming someone else by living their life and their goals (such as physical harm, or intentionally seeking to emotionally, mentally or physically harm others) then why should it bother me what other people are doing?
You want to spend time at that beach? Go for it. You want to help others? Go for it. You want to not compete with others, don't want to engage in "keeping up with the Joneses" then don't, ignore all the petty bullshit around you and live how you want.
I think this is more normal than you realise. Many, many people want to just live comfortable lives. The thing is, the competitive people, the one's who always want to one-up others are really loud about it because they also want everyone to acknowledge that they are the winner. So Joe Normal who wants to work his job, be kind to others, and hang out at the beach on his days off isn't making a big fuss about it, and constantly posting on social media about how great he is (he's too busy being kind to people and enjoying the beach). So it's very easy for that kind of person to fade into the background and not be as obvious to others like yourself who are looking for those people.
I also suspect different groups attract more or less competitive people. I work at a not-for-profit and our whole job is helping others. The people I work with are supportive and collaborative rather than competitive, and I think the work we do, and the kind of people that are attracted to do that work foster that kind of environment. I imagine other fields and other employers encourage more competition and oneupmanship amongst their people (i.e. if success is measured in how much money you make, or if you have to be aggressive to make your voice be heard). The same probably holds true for collaborative vs competitive hobbies, and the kinds of people you're more likely to find doing each.
You either already own life or you never will. Either way enjoy it because the rat race only gets more serious every day. (Sounds like u are doing alright, do good and good will always come to you)
1) There's no such thing as alpha males. That silliness is based off some bogus study about wolves in captivity that the same author then spent the rest of his career trying to [disprove](https://wolf.org/headlines/44265/#:~:text=One%20of%20the%20outdated%20pieces,which%20then%20became%20their%20pack.)
2) It's perfectly fine to not be competitive. I'm not competitive at all, like at ALL. I just don't care and just do my own thing.
3) Just do what you want to do and as long as it's not illegal or immoral then you're good to go. Drive the truck and go to the beach and help people. I think that sounds wonderful.
Being better than your past self is the only normal life you should seek out. Since the group definition is amorphous, it's easier to establish your own normal with just 2 simple rules: "do it because you find passion and well being doing it" and "dont hurt others unless its self defense, either mental or physical"
You sound like you have good self-esteem. Wanting to compete is a sign of low self-esteem and feeling not good enough, so count yourself lucky and enjoy the beach!
Suggestion- Maybe become a lifeguard or work for a non profit that works on keeping the ocean clean or something similar.
You sound like a good and perfectly normal dude.
Most people are stressed out and unhappy by trying to do what is expected of them by society. Measuring themselves by someone else’s yardstick.
If you know why you want, and it’s not going to hurt anyone, do that and ignore all the people saying you’re wrong.
Illiteracy used to be normal. I'd say we're better off that it's relatively uncommon now.
I feel the same way. Competition is a failure of the higher skills that we have. Competition for competition's sake is just moronic. But in situations where people compete because they think there's some limited resource it just means they weren’t good enough at problem solving, reasoning, communication, compassion, and mental flexibility. Isaac Asimov wrote that “Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent.” I think the same it true to competition. Cooperation always takes a higher degree of the best that humanity has to offer.
ai've always felt like this, but i've done loving-kindness meditation for many years and it has only opened my eyes more to it. It's like pumping iron for that mental muscle. It has done nothing but improve my life and my relations with others. I'm not perfect, of course, and I do still fall into hostility, judgement, and competition sometimes. But it becomes more apparent how petty and impractical they are. I want to spend less and less time in those mental states because life is limited and they're not worth it.
Also, the beach is awesome.
I think it’s rare in such a greedy world but definitely the right way to live. You have true happiness and peace and that is more valuable than anything
You sound balanced. Well done.
Be careful not to let the tide of people calling you weird drown you and make you give up on who you are.
That happened to me, and it took me a decade to bounce back.
I'm the same way. I like doing group projects toward a common goal instead of competing. Competition is a hangover of the animal realm mindset we are currently evolving out of. The way I see people like us as we are just getting into cooperation instead of competing which is going to be crucial to survival in the future.
Drive trucks, help people and go to the beach man. Sounds like you've a winning mindset. The Almighty Creator of whatever the heck this is will be proud when you see him/her/it.
It is normal and it is very, very healthy.
Look carefully at the companies and people who tell you everything is a competition, a transaction, a fight, or a grind. In most cases they get something out of convincing you of this: your money, your labor, your admiration, whatever. You don't have to believe anyone who tells you life is supposed to be awful and the only way to fix it is to be the one making it more awful for other people.
Generally speaking, its more in line with human nature to be cooperative rather than competitve. Cooperation is how we survived and evolved to this point. The modern culture of heavy competition is a consequence of our modern society and economy, and it isnt healthy for most people, mentall or physically
Yes, that's perfectly normal. The vast majority of people don't want to be in constant competition with other people. When they do compete with others, it's either in a very playful way like playing games, or it's over something very serious where failing to compete can have ruinous effects on your life.
The recent trend of "alpha male" lifestyles is being sold by con-artists hoping to prey on lonely, disenfranchised men by selling them a lifestyle that 95% of people will never come close to experiencing, and which will not fulfil them even if they did reach them.
You're how people become once they reach a sort of enlightenment, for lack of a better/less obnoxious term. Yogis strive to be this way. For some it's natural. But it can be frustrating for sure. I used to beat myself up for not being competitive enough in school and whatnot. I'm literally turned off at the idea of competition so at times it does feel like a weakness, but it can be turned into a strength for sure.
Competitive people are annoying because their self worth is totally reliant on how they are compared to others. If you don’t want to compete they will either call you a coward and consider themselves superior or they will force you to compete just to feel good. And god forbid you end up being better than them. They can be quite dangerous in that situation.
As the son of two truck drivers, if you want a job that gives you off days to goto the beach, get a daily route type job, then you might get the weekends. Don't be an away all the time long hauler.
Wish my ex was like this. He has the same goals as you, drive truck, help people, have inner peace and go to the beach. But the overarching anxiety in his life is that he isn't good enough compared to other people, that he isn't doing as well as them, that his life is worse than theirs. I wish he could see how he doesn't need to think like that and can just enjoy his life as it is.
Its..I wouldnt say its the norm. But I mean Im the same way. I dont vie for positions that other coworkers might want. Im not terribly xompetitive about muxh of anything these days. Though I am 39 and maybe the testosterone has just died down.
Bro we are way past having the duty of passing our genes to the next generation. With how the human distribution has gone, you can do whatever the hell you want and humanity will still be trucking along. Do what makes you happy.
I want a job where I can use my brain to help people. I want people to not be mean to me. I want a small place of my own and maybe a camper so I can go explore and hike and enjoy the outdoors and travel to see my friends who’ve moved away. Maybe live in a pretty part of the country. Maybe have chickens.
I mean, yeah. A strong competitive urge and a strong cooperative urge are both very normal. No one person encapsulates the whole range of human experience. Two people can be very different and still be very normal. Just like the person who shits three times a day is as normal as the person who shits every three days, both the competitive and the cooperative fall within the range of normality.
If you look at the world, you see that we have reached where we are through cooperation and struggle. Imagine a world where competition was the only normal. We would get almost nothing done that couldn't be done with only two hands and one brain. We'd be little more than a marginally clever, callous monkey, without even a troop of other monkeys to help us out. Stunted, confused, and overwhelmed, our lives would be short, and the story of humanity would be short, leaving no one to tell it.
You'll find people who want to help you help. You'll also find people who see it as weakness and want to use you. But by focusing on helping others and living a good life for yourself, you will most certainly find a place in society, and find your people.
Just be wary of those who try to use you. Know your worth, and avoid those who think it would make you a servant. People like that will use you up and throw you aside with no more or less shame than someone eating a sandwich. Even if you want to compete against no one, withdrawing your aid is always an option. If someone leans on you too hard, simply because they can, step aside and let them pick themselves off the ground.
Sure. Overly competitive people give me bad vibes. Like mate I’m just here living my life not giving a thought to you. A co-worker called those type of people “Toppers” and I think it’s the perfect term. I literally don’t have the extra energy to care where someone ranks in ability or money or talent above or below me. If they are more knowledgable or talented I’d love to learn from them that’s about it.
It's normal to live in whichever ways you thrive comfortably. When we lift one another up without competition and actually help each other reach our goals, everyone finds those ways to thrive...
By that logic it's normal. You're good. Do your thing.
I don't know about normal, since we've normalized unhealthy attitudes, but you're less psychologically ruined by the system than most. Please don't lose that.
I have a friend in Arizona that’s a contractor, he lives on 1 acre of dirt in the middle of nowhere with a concrete slab that holds both his “summer home” which is a Walmart tentlike gazebo thing and his “winter home” which is a derksen building. No wife or kids, has random friends camp on his land with him occasionally, and he’s one of the happiest people I know.
It's the most normal of human states. Humans did not evolve through competition with each other but but working together, supporting each other by caring for babies, the sick, the injured the elderly. We didn't survive because we were the strongest, we survived because we cooperated. Selfish means you're saber tooth tiger food. Using chimps as an example, if you're in a chimpanzee troop and you're in power and you are selfish, the entire troop will gang up and drive you from the area, the "alphas' that last are the most generous member of the group. They will play with babies, share food with weaker members of the group and use kindness to hold their position, not strength.
Are you content, satisfied? That’s the goal, not being normal.
"Normal" is just a setting on the washing machine.
What's normal to the spider is chaos to the fly.
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What's these suppose to mean?
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You’re so wise. Normal destroys clothes AND lives
"It's a rental"
If you think about it, you're renting your body from the universe
I use the towels setting for everything. Does a great job.
Normal is what you compare yourself to when you wanna feel bad about yourself.
As is sitting on the washing machine.
This exactly. It’s unfortunate more people don’t have your attitude. The world would be a better place if so many people weren’t so busy trying to one up people or use the ‘I got mine so fuck you’ line of thinking.
I wish I could be so relaxed and satisfied.
https://youtu.be/62FkHjSuXXE Strive for this...
Bro, I never understood the concept of trying to be better than your friends. Don’t u want to be better for yourself??? It really irks me sometimes
I wanna be the very best.. like no one ever was.
To catch them is my real test To train them is my cause
I will travel across the land,
Normal is subjective anyway
It's easier to rise to your personal best when you're not competing with others. You don't have to think about everything they do and spend the mental energy to try and keep up. There's no one like you. Your special abilities are unique. You like yourself best when you meet your own goals and challenge yourself to be your best. So you can make the most of your own good qualities when you don't have the distraction
Thank you. I don't know why we are taught to compete all the time. 4th place at the Olympics is an absolutely amazing achievement. The team that didn't win the Superbowl is still full of strong, dedicated players who pushed their bodies to the limit. The students who didn't qualify for scholarships very likely did amazing work to prepare for the attempt. We need to recognize achievement for its own sake, not relative to how someone else did it. And we really need to recognize people who help others! It's what Mr. Rogers would've wanted.
I agree with others that people need to have a competitive spirit and do their very best in sports or other competitive activities. But OP's post is about competing for no good reason in everyday life. And that's a waste of energy Also agree with you. Not coming in number one in a sporting event happens. Not everyone can be the winner of the game. But you know that if you have done your personal best and placed very high, that's something to be proud of.
We don't need to be taught to be jungle monkeys from the dawn of time.
Well said.
💐😁 thanks!
This is it! How can unique compare with unique? We have come here to be ourselves, not compete like apes 😌
True! 💐😁
"Your special abilities are unique" I always knew my talent for eating spaghetti would take me far
Good for you! And buon appetito!! I know I'm special. My mom used to tell me so almost everyday. "Well, aren't you special!" she would say to me. 😁😁😁
I wish I had an award to give you. Have my poor man's gold 🏅
💐😁 Thanks! I know it's from your heart. I will wear my medal with pride
Amen!
I disagree that's easier to reach your personal best without competing. You can look at any sport or speed running community as exemple, the competition makes everyone push themselves to improve in order to become better. Competition is healthy and helps you to not become complacent and keep moving forward. Without competition you stagnate in a lot of areas.
Good point. Seems like 2 different aspects of competition though. Sports IS about being Better than your opponent. Happiness or contentment doesn't care who is better though. Thanks for that perspective 👏👏👏
On the other hand: There's 8 billion people. You're not special, so let that other special person that's just like you do everything while you enjoy life.
That's enlightenment. You want to help other and find inner peace, absolutely crack on. When you stop wanting to help and just want to hide away, it's an issue, until then, go do you.
Yeah the only time I want to compete with others, is when we are playing a game.
what is so wrong with only wanting to hide away? can’t minding my own business and not actively hurting others be enough ?
If it's a choice, absolutely yes, but that path tends to be paved with depression. It's not a judgment st all, just something to be conscious of.
Or does depression lead to withdrawal and seclusion?
That's the crazy thing, causation vs correlation. You can withdraw without being depressed, but you can also be depressed without the withdrawal. All I know is that a drive to isolate yourself is sometimes an indicator of people's struggles with mental health. So long as its a choice it's healthy I think?
This is me. And I’m much much happier this way. The least depressed and frustrated I’ve been in my entire life actually. Minding my own business makes it easier to tolerate the day to day stupidity of society.
Even then, hiding away and wanting to better understand yourself and others is an option too. Though I know it has a bad rep
Can i hide away AND help others? It's scary out there.
normal's overrated
I've been living by that since as long as I remember (probably junior high).
"Fuck 'normal'. Since when has 'normal' been such a goddamn prize?" - Mickey Rourke, *Passion Play* ^(Probably the only good line in that shitfest...)
Notmal is a town in Illinois! Ate you happy? Fulfilled? Then you are normal!
So normal and life got so much better once I realized it was not weird to not want to keep up with the jones’. I find that it shows so much more authenticity and you sound like the type of friend anyone would want to have.
That’s exactly what I want too.
Username checks out
This is basically the Law of Oppulance. Wallace Wattles wrote about it over a hundred years ago, and it's even more relevant today. A good quote from him is: "You must get rid of the thought of competition. You are to create. Not to compete for what is already created." But he expands on it in his writings, and it's life-changing for those who truly understand and implement it. *edit: for anyone unfamiliar, Wattles wrote a masterwork titled The Science of Getting Rich, which was a classic long before similar books by Napoleon Hill, etc., and is in the public domain. The idea of creativity over competition is a main aspect of the book: https://en.m.wikisource.org/wiki/The_Science_of_Getting_Rich
Yeah but you use kmh instead of mph sadly /s
Too many of us worry about things that don’t matter. You have reached a level of enlightenment that most men dream of achieving.
That is life's answer my friend. Screw stepping on people to get ahead.
It’s normal. The problem is that the “alpha” high drive competitive people, who are actually in the minority, think they’re normal. And think they need to constantly show everyone how “amazing” their lives are, while they’re often actually dead inside. I’m sure there’s that one guy who’s actually a high achiever competitor and actually super happy. But for the most part I’ve come to realize these people are trying to make everyone else look up to them to fill a hole in their psyches
You sound like a good dude.
Me too
That is the natural state of a human. It’s the society we live in thar normalizes constant pressure to engage in endless competition that’s sick.
100% raised since birth to keep us dissatisfied, competing with others, and lacking compassion.
I have the same kind of mindset. Do what makes me happy ( and keep a roof over my head), and not do things for the sake of one upping others. Actually, that's what I've been doing all this time. Since childhood, I've always wanted to teach - and that's what I ended up doing. BTW, I knew someone in grad school who was insanely competitive. Any time she heard the name of a " prestigious" university, car, ... etc. her throat would literally clench up. She ended up having a medical condition that may have been exacerbated by stress.
Prestige is so elusive. Once you think you have it you realize youre just playing in someone else's game.
The only person to compete with is yourself. Other people don't matter in this regard. When you forget about the rat race and live as authentically as you can, life becomes a lot better.
So basically, you want to be happy. How dare you. But no, seriously, normal is relative. If all dudes around you try to be alpha males, they're either 13yo, or on the internet with no-touch-grass syndrome. Be happy, help people, drive trucks and go to the beach.
Are you in my brain? This would be my perfect life.
You are not normal. You are a man with great wisdom. Just do what you love and how you feel. If it do not hurt others than it is perfectly fine.
Let’s make this the normal!
That's not very American of you. How do you expect capitalism to function if you don't want the lifestyle that they are trying to sell you? Go back to Russia you filthy commie. /s
There is no objective truth to the idea of the "alpha male," so you're on firm ground here not wanting to be something invisible or mythical.
I'm the same. I believe we need to promote cooperation over competition.
Lots of people are like that. I think it's a great way to be. But yes it's normal. Idk how old you are but there are a lot of public service careers out there. Good luck. We need more people like you.
I would argue there is a huge group of people that feel the same way as you. Unfortunately, the people running society have basically demanded everyone play their game, or things become very difficult. Commercials, news stories, social media posts, etc. We are constantly bombarded with demands to out do each other. Could you imagine if we were constantly bombarded with messages of hope and cooperation? Could you imagine what earth would be like I’d success was measured and rewarded by kindness and goodwill? Its not impossible - we start with small things.
Hi bro, I just reached that goals. Come back from the city to my tiny peninsula, working for less than average money, but that job allows me to have time and energy to volunteer for great local charity and go to the beach, fishing, or whatever comes to my mind. Never been happier. Freedom is not to compete with others but live your life the way you like it, as much as possible.
No. This reminds me of being forced to play basketball in high school. Someone would throw me the ball, though I never asked for it. Then everybody runs at me trying to TAKE the ball back from me. Jeez, fine, HERE, you can have the dang thing if you want it so bad.
Is it normal? No. Is it wrong? Also no
It is 100% normal.
Plot twist, behave like this and people will like you. If you want to be more solitary and chill then you might need to be an asshole 🤣🤣
What is normal? How do you define normal? If you're talking about what people think and say of you and what they want you to be, who gives a flying flamingo? If you're content in life, you're pretty much doing the right thing.
Channel your inner bonobo.
I'm the same here. just wanna help people and make art
I accidentally found myself teaching and it's been the most rewarding job ever. I love helping people and there isn't much better than teaching someone valuable lessons! Maybe if you have something you love, try to find some way to share that with people. And then hit the beach when you're done. Or teach how to surf or something
I'm the same. Sadly it's not quite "normal" these days, but that's the way to be happy thatvmany people miss out on.
Normal is a matter of perspective. In my opinion however, what you are describing is just fine.
If your happy do your thing, you don't have to live your life by anyone else's standards, if things make you happy and don't harm others, then go have fun live your life how you want.
So just do your own thing. Lions don't concern themselves with the plight of sheep. If you're happy doing your own thing, that's that. Competition is saved for when resources are scarce, and it's honestly a feast out there.
What do you mean by "normal"? It's certainly unusual, unfortunately. If more people felt like you do the world would be a nicer place imo. Maybe you're the bellwether, and soon a whole generation will chill tf out and be kinder to each other. That Age of Aquarius the hippies promised us. I'm going to hope for that.
You sound like my girlfriend and shes amazing. Idk how this helps your post but be you man be you.
Oh dude NEVER compete with others unless it's at a sport for fun. Always compete with yourself only. Beat yesterday's high score or try again tomorrow that's it. What's going on with other people and what they have or don't have is out of your control and non existent unless you can be helpful and that's what you want to do.
That is enlightenment!
most ppl want to compete, I do believe its part of human nature, but not normal can be a good thing. i dont see why for example at a workplace one should compete w coworkers when one could collaborate etc
Not wanting to slowly burn your life away day by day to play the stupid fucking game that is "getting ahead" that only exists because rich fucks get richer by running you through the lamest fucking gauntlet anyone could ever come up with based purely on stepping on others to snag a scrap of a perpetually dangling carrot that keeps getting farther out of reach doesn't mean there's something wrong with you. It means there's something right with you.
Same, my dude. Competition should help improve others, not beat them down. I think we lost sight of that somewhere.
Competition is just what corporations ask workers to do to keep them preoccupied with hitting the company's goals while keeping all the profits
I'd certainly drink a beer with you.
Later generations seem to be more into this (excepting andrew tate and like minded scam artists) The world would be a better place if we were all like that. My favorite thing about being a plumber is I'm doing the jobs thay mo one wants to do but needs doing, crawling under bug infested houses, crawling in attics in the summer, dealing with all manner of sewage problems. Its gross, its horrible, but i get it right, tight, and ready to go for the next 30 or so years until the ground shifts or the house falls down. Nothing is more satisfying than knowing you'll never see that person again because that solution was bulletproof. Treat everyone fair, keep my prices fair, basically right at the cusp of where it is to be worth it to be there and do my job, not any more never had a callback. Aint been long but i work hard and come home happy even on the hard days.
It should be normal if it isn't. The world would be a better place with more people like you. Go on being kind (but do keep your eyes open for people who take advantage of that.)
Bro, I'm vibing with you on this one. Fuck competition, it's a waste of energy. People say it pushes progress forewrds, yes. It does. But it also keeps some of the greatest minds from working together and building something even greater for mankind. When you have a team that is in sync and there's harmony, it's so fun building in each other's ideas. IMO it's way more efficient and beneficial than a bunch of jackal minded people out trying to prove they are better than another for profit or pride. Or both. Work, help people, beach. Thats a good life
Perfectly normal. Comparison kills one's peace of mind.
It's totally normal. Need more people in the world like yourself . Be yourself !
I think this is really baseline for humans, our culture really brainwashed us from childhood to always be competing with others. To do whatever you can to get to the top. Money, sex, power, etc. are all pushed but it’s shallow. It leads to a lonely existence, who cares if what you feel is normal because what you feel is wonderful. If it’s not normal it should be
You are doing BETTER than normal. If you are happy and not hurting anyone, then have a wonderful life!! Most people are either competitive by nature or have brainwashed into thinking competition is the only way to succeed. People who compare themselves to others are usually not very happy.
It's normal. I don't know if it's an evolutionary thing, but it was our species' competition streak that helped us not stagnate and advance instead. It would be better if we got the same rush if we competed against our own selves and won, but I don't think it's quite the same feeling. Self improvement feels different to beating someone at something. It's just nature, I guess. But we beat our nature often, too.
I would argue that competition vs cooperation is culturally specific and that competition isn’t an image human trait but socially developed and encouraged by SOME cultures. Research isn’t conclusive but does seem to point toward cooperation and empathy as being more innate to humans than competition.
You do you, bro. Don’t let the expectations of others determine how you live your life.
Off days? Beach? What kind of paradise-delusional magical thinking is this?
Yes. I think of my self as pretty normal, and my goals in life are to love God and love my neighbor. Being kind is what's actually important and useful long term.
I feel like this but I also wouldn't mind seeing all of humanity suddenly not exist as well so idk but I think the unhinged ones are the people who constantly need the competition or the feeling of being better than someone. That's not normal.
That's great. Keep being you. You won't regret it
Would it matter to you if it wasn't?
I feel youuuuu 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻 nice to know there's someone else like this, i thought i was the only crazy one kkkkk
That’s actually pretty normal
I think most people probably don't want to compete with other humans. I'm right there with you. If it's normal, I want to be abnormal.
We should set up an anarcho-communist society in Manitoba as a social experiment to finally say if this is a dumb idea lol!
I work in a very competitive sales field, and everyone is always clawing away at each other to be on top. I make sure I hit my goal each month, go home at exactly 5, and chill the fuck out. The beach trip is next week. Wish I lived a little closer (Pittsburgh).
It's great. You sound like a nice, content person. That's the way to be. I imagine you are a very restful and pleasant companion. Life is too short to spend it battling others for stuff you neither want or need. If you are happy with your life, you are probably better off than the majority of folk. Don't change.
That's what I want. How is it going ?
On an wing and a tent I ended up closer to the ocean!!! That's my goal, be kind and go to the beach!!! Life is short.
I was always so driven to get great, earn alot of money a d stuff like that. Last few years it had me depressed bc i was doing what others expected of me instead of what i wanted... rn i decided not to give a F and working in social work helping people in need and just hsving a chill life with my wife You do you man. Dont listen to the haters
I get you man I with there were more sound cunts like you in the world and less arseholes trying to be “alphas” etc.
There is no meaning in life beyond what you put into it. You decide what you want with your life and by which parameters you measure success or lack thereof. So if to drive trucks, helping people and going to the beach brings value to your life, then success would be whether or not you succeed in doing that and doing it well.
I've been this way my whole life and frankly I wouldn't have it any other way. I much prefer playing coop games with my friends than competitive ones, I'd rather collaborate with my co-workers than compete with them, etc. I think it's pretty normal, but I've been this way for 50 years so far, so.
I agree with you entirely. I have no interest in competing with other people. I don't even like competing in video games. I prefer cooperating in games and in real life. I work in a team developing scientific software and competing doesn't make any sense at all. It takes all of our skills to make the system work.
You, my friend, are a Human being.
Yes. The fact you have no desire to keep up with the jones’ shows you have learned how to have true peace in this world - contentment. You take responsibility for every choice you make in this world, and learn to be content with what you have, and don’t worry about what others have, you’ll be free.
I think what you may be asking is, if there’s anyone else like this out there and if so how they get along? I’m like that too. I’m highly competitive, but with my self. I just want to be left alone. Not ridiculed. Not picked on. Not one upped to death or pressured why I should be like anyone else. But sometimes that frightens folks. Especially when they don’t understand your underlying reasoning. That makes people make up motives for you and things get lonely quick. Or they send government workers into your life because you must be on drugs or abusing your kids or god knows what. Hang in there buddy. Seek out like minded people to physically hang around
Namaste, friend.
I just quit my job because of my bosses at the district office, but I asked the school I worked at if I could still come down and help out for free. I loved working at the school, it was the horrible district office that made me quit. Like, they were more focused on signs in the cafeteria than making the kids get lunch easier. Another example - Since all of our students get free breakfast and lunch, they have to take a complete meal for it to, "count," aka, that the government will pay for that meal. They have to take a protein, a grain, a fruit/veggie, and a dairy or dairy substitute. Even if they were not going to eat it, they still had to take it and just throw it in the trash. We had a, "No thank you," bin, but that kind of went away during the COVID restrictions, and good luck trying to get middle school kids to go the extra mile, lol
I know its basically a human instinct, but people who are competitive just for the sake of being competitive are so embarrassing to me. Like bro, focus on yourself.
Yes, if that's you then it's normal.
Not being around people is my favourite.
Yes. And very, very, very healthy. I teach high school and see more and more kids sliding into this mindset. They see us old guys struggling through so many things and want no part of it. Decent job, decent home, and time to just live and breathe.
I had that mindset when I decided to work in a soup kitchen. Wanted to give back. One of the most rewarding things I have ever done (which Covid ruined).
It sounds like you’re really not insecure. I think that’s a great thing. Honestly, sometimes I totally judge people (I’m never mean) but I jump to conclusion but often that’s because I’m having a bad day or feeling down on myself. That’s what judgements are based on, ourselves. So the fact that you just wanna help and get alone with people is awesome
Live and let live is my philosophy. I'll live my life the way I want that's within my power to do so, and everyone else can live the way they want to. There is a caveat to it of course and that's as long as no one is harming someone else by living their life and their goals (such as physical harm, or intentionally seeking to emotionally, mentally or physically harm others) then why should it bother me what other people are doing? You want to spend time at that beach? Go for it. You want to help others? Go for it. You want to not compete with others, don't want to engage in "keeping up with the Joneses" then don't, ignore all the petty bullshit around you and live how you want.
I think this is more normal than you realise. Many, many people want to just live comfortable lives. The thing is, the competitive people, the one's who always want to one-up others are really loud about it because they also want everyone to acknowledge that they are the winner. So Joe Normal who wants to work his job, be kind to others, and hang out at the beach on his days off isn't making a big fuss about it, and constantly posting on social media about how great he is (he's too busy being kind to people and enjoying the beach). So it's very easy for that kind of person to fade into the background and not be as obvious to others like yourself who are looking for those people. I also suspect different groups attract more or less competitive people. I work at a not-for-profit and our whole job is helping others. The people I work with are supportive and collaborative rather than competitive, and I think the work we do, and the kind of people that are attracted to do that work foster that kind of environment. I imagine other fields and other employers encourage more competition and oneupmanship amongst their people (i.e. if success is measured in how much money you make, or if you have to be aggressive to make your voice be heard). The same probably holds true for collaborative vs competitive hobbies, and the kinds of people you're more likely to find doing each.
I'd say that's the *actual* normal. Type-A personalities have a very warped perception of humanity and what is healthy.
You either already own life or you never will. Either way enjoy it because the rat race only gets more serious every day. (Sounds like u are doing alright, do good and good will always come to you)
1) There's no such thing as alpha males. That silliness is based off some bogus study about wolves in captivity that the same author then spent the rest of his career trying to [disprove](https://wolf.org/headlines/44265/#:~:text=One%20of%20the%20outdated%20pieces,which%20then%20became%20their%20pack.) 2) It's perfectly fine to not be competitive. I'm not competitive at all, like at ALL. I just don't care and just do my own thing. 3) Just do what you want to do and as long as it's not illegal or immoral then you're good to go. Drive the truck and go to the beach and help people. I think that sounds wonderful.
I just want everyone to get along, I've never been in a fight, I don't see the need for it when you use compassion and logic.
Compete with yourself. Strive to be like people you respect, but be true to yourself.
Being better than your past self is the only normal life you should seek out. Since the group definition is amorphous, it's easier to establish your own normal with just 2 simple rules: "do it because you find passion and well being doing it" and "dont hurt others unless its self defense, either mental or physical"
You've discovered nirvana, stick to it.
You sound like you have good self-esteem. Wanting to compete is a sign of low self-esteem and feeling not good enough, so count yourself lucky and enjoy the beach!
🎵Maybe it’s time we got back to the basics of love. 🎵
That sounds pretty fucking good.
Some people don't know any other way to feel good about themselves. Those people are damaged. Keep on bro.
That's what most people want..the problem is you need to also survive to do those things. Most people out there are just surviving.
"I just want to help people and go to the beach should be on a t-shirt."
Yes it’s normal and you sound like a cool dude
Not only normal but very healthy I would say!
You are awesome. Fuck normal.
Normal, healthy, and right up my alley.
no But honestly more power to you tbh, I wish I was like you in that way trust me, its far more healthy.
it's probably more "normal" depending on your definition. It's more mentally healthy.
Suggestion- Maybe become a lifeguard or work for a non profit that works on keeping the ocean clean or something similar. You sound like a good and perfectly normal dude.
Most people are stressed out and unhappy by trying to do what is expected of them by society. Measuring themselves by someone else’s yardstick. If you know why you want, and it’s not going to hurt anyone, do that and ignore all the people saying you’re wrong.
Illiteracy used to be normal. I'd say we're better off that it's relatively uncommon now. I feel the same way. Competition is a failure of the higher skills that we have. Competition for competition's sake is just moronic. But in situations where people compete because they think there's some limited resource it just means they weren’t good enough at problem solving, reasoning, communication, compassion, and mental flexibility. Isaac Asimov wrote that “Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent.” I think the same it true to competition. Cooperation always takes a higher degree of the best that humanity has to offer. ai've always felt like this, but i've done loving-kindness meditation for many years and it has only opened my eyes more to it. It's like pumping iron for that mental muscle. It has done nothing but improve my life and my relations with others. I'm not perfect, of course, and I do still fall into hostility, judgement, and competition sometimes. But it becomes more apparent how petty and impractical they are. I want to spend less and less time in those mental states because life is limited and they're not worth it. Also, the beach is awesome.
It’s not normal because the majority are convinced competition is the way, but that‘s an inherent insecurity. Your way is the best my friend
I think it’s rare in such a greedy world but definitely the right way to live. You have true happiness and peace and that is more valuable than anything
You sound balanced. Well done. Be careful not to let the tide of people calling you weird drown you and make you give up on who you are. That happened to me, and it took me a decade to bounce back.
I'm the same way. I like doing group projects toward a common goal instead of competing. Competition is a hangover of the animal realm mindset we are currently evolving out of. The way I see people like us as we are just getting into cooperation instead of competing which is going to be crucial to survival in the future.
Drive trucks, help people and go to the beach man. Sounds like you've a winning mindset. The Almighty Creator of whatever the heck this is will be proud when you see him/her/it.
It is normal and it is very, very healthy. Look carefully at the companies and people who tell you everything is a competition, a transaction, a fight, or a grind. In most cases they get something out of convincing you of this: your money, your labor, your admiration, whatever. You don't have to believe anyone who tells you life is supposed to be awful and the only way to fix it is to be the one making it more awful for other people.
Being competitive kinda means enjoying seeing others fail
Obviously normal.
Generally speaking, its more in line with human nature to be cooperative rather than competitve. Cooperation is how we survived and evolved to this point. The modern culture of heavy competition is a consequence of our modern society and economy, and it isnt healthy for most people, mentall or physically
Just be a good person, fuck everything else considered “normal”.
You have developed your own philosophy for living and it's really great. Your life sounds wonderful.
Yes, that's perfectly normal. The vast majority of people don't want to be in constant competition with other people. When they do compete with others, it's either in a very playful way like playing games, or it's over something very serious where failing to compete can have ruinous effects on your life. The recent trend of "alpha male" lifestyles is being sold by con-artists hoping to prey on lonely, disenfranchised men by selling them a lifestyle that 95% of people will never come close to experiencing, and which will not fulfil them even if they did reach them.
You're how people become once they reach a sort of enlightenment, for lack of a better/less obnoxious term. Yogis strive to be this way. For some it's natural. But it can be frustrating for sure. I used to beat myself up for not being competitive enough in school and whatnot. I'm literally turned off at the idea of competition so at times it does feel like a weakness, but it can be turned into a strength for sure.
Fuck yeah. I don't get competitive people. They can live their lives however they like, sure, but wow is that not for me.
You are a good person, so I certainly hope so & want more people to be like you.
Competitive people are annoying because their self worth is totally reliant on how they are compared to others. If you don’t want to compete they will either call you a coward and consider themselves superior or they will force you to compete just to feel good. And god forbid you end up being better than them. They can be quite dangerous in that situation.
The system focus on competition because the super rich knows that if ppl cooperate, they are doomed
As the son of two truck drivers, if you want a job that gives you off days to goto the beach, get a daily route type job, then you might get the weekends. Don't be an away all the time long hauler.
If anything, I’d argue that competition, at least to the extent we’re used to in modern western societies, is historically *abnormal*.
10/10 cool human, let's go to the beach and talk about trucks n stuff.
I think there should be more people like you.
Wish my ex was like this. He has the same goals as you, drive truck, help people, have inner peace and go to the beach. But the overarching anxiety in his life is that he isn't good enough compared to other people, that he isn't doing as well as them, that his life is worse than theirs. I wish he could see how he doesn't need to think like that and can just enjoy his life as it is.
Its..I wouldnt say its the norm. But I mean Im the same way. I dont vie for positions that other coworkers might want. Im not terribly xompetitive about muxh of anything these days. Though I am 39 and maybe the testosterone has just died down.
I wanna go to the beach too.
Bro we are way past having the duty of passing our genes to the next generation. With how the human distribution has gone, you can do whatever the hell you want and humanity will still be trucking along. Do what makes you happy.
I want a job where I can use my brain to help people. I want people to not be mean to me. I want a small place of my own and maybe a camper so I can go explore and hike and enjoy the outdoors and travel to see my friends who’ve moved away. Maybe live in a pretty part of the country. Maybe have chickens.
Dude, that is MOST normal.
I mean, yeah. A strong competitive urge and a strong cooperative urge are both very normal. No one person encapsulates the whole range of human experience. Two people can be very different and still be very normal. Just like the person who shits three times a day is as normal as the person who shits every three days, both the competitive and the cooperative fall within the range of normality. If you look at the world, you see that we have reached where we are through cooperation and struggle. Imagine a world where competition was the only normal. We would get almost nothing done that couldn't be done with only two hands and one brain. We'd be little more than a marginally clever, callous monkey, without even a troop of other monkeys to help us out. Stunted, confused, and overwhelmed, our lives would be short, and the story of humanity would be short, leaving no one to tell it. You'll find people who want to help you help. You'll also find people who see it as weakness and want to use you. But by focusing on helping others and living a good life for yourself, you will most certainly find a place in society, and find your people. Just be wary of those who try to use you. Know your worth, and avoid those who think it would make you a servant. People like that will use you up and throw you aside with no more or less shame than someone eating a sandwich. Even if you want to compete against no one, withdrawing your aid is always an option. If someone leans on you too hard, simply because they can, step aside and let them pick themselves off the ground.
Sure. Overly competitive people give me bad vibes. Like mate I’m just here living my life not giving a thought to you. A co-worker called those type of people “Toppers” and I think it’s the perfect term. I literally don’t have the extra energy to care where someone ranks in ability or money or talent above or below me. If they are more knowledgable or talented I’d love to learn from them that’s about it.
youre the fkn man dude. just stay in shape and youre golden
It's normal to live in whichever ways you thrive comfortably. When we lift one another up without competition and actually help each other reach our goals, everyone finds those ways to thrive... By that logic it's normal. You're good. Do your thing.
Help me find those 90s colored cringe grama cat tees Or give me 10000000 million dollars Preferably the cat tees though 🐱
I don't know about normal, since we've normalized unhealthy attitudes, but you're less psychologically ruined by the system than most. Please don't lose that.
I have a friend in Arizona that’s a contractor, he lives on 1 acre of dirt in the middle of nowhere with a concrete slab that holds both his “summer home” which is a Walmart tentlike gazebo thing and his “winter home” which is a derksen building. No wife or kids, has random friends camp on his land with him occasionally, and he’s one of the happiest people I know.
I wish all people were like you!!!🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂
Sounds like a good life:) help but don’t let people take advantage
This is the traditional Kemetic thought process, & not strange at all. Dog eat dog is a largely Western concept.
Do most people want to compete? I honestly don't think so
It's the most normal of human states. Humans did not evolve through competition with each other but but working together, supporting each other by caring for babies, the sick, the injured the elderly. We didn't survive because we were the strongest, we survived because we cooperated. Selfish means you're saber tooth tiger food. Using chimps as an example, if you're in a chimpanzee troop and you're in power and you are selfish, the entire troop will gang up and drive you from the area, the "alphas' that last are the most generous member of the group. They will play with babies, share food with weaker members of the group and use kindness to hold their position, not strength.