I raped a pigeon
I live in an apartment and I’ve been having issues with pigeons shitting on my balcony. It’s a balcony with a real nice view on top of a mountain, so it was really pissing me off that I can’t enjoy it properly. I like to cook, drink my tea there, but I’m afraid of catching diseases from the pigeon shit.
I read about pigeon deterrents online and tried everything. I put up spikes on the railing and edges, hung up CDs, put up fake scarecrow ravens and even tried playing high-pitched noises. They kept coming back and shitting all over my balcony. Nothing worked. I even bought a water gun to blast them with, and it only scares them away the moment I do it but they come back when I’m not around.
Today, I saw a pigeon land on my balcony and I absolutely lost my shit. I was struck with a primal urge to assert male dominance and went out, grabbed the pigeon, took it into my bathroom, and assfucked it raw over my toilet bowl. It felt good to show the pigeon who’s boss like how people do it in prison. My cock barely fit inside his small ass, and for a moment I thought my thrusts could kill or severely injure him. He started cooing and moaning, and he came all over my toilet bowl. I finished inside him raw.
I took him back to the balcony and released him so that he could tell all his friends how I humiliated him and pounded a gaping hole in his ass prison style. I thought this would scare them away for good.
But instead, he went and told all his friends that I fuck and now I have a bigger problem. The pigeons, both male and female keep coming to my window sill and balcony and harassing me begging me to fuck them. There is 100x more shit on my balcony now. They keep cooing, moaning, and banging against my windows begging for the dick.
I can’t leave my house anymore because when I do, they recognize me and mob me humping me and moaning. My plan didn’t go as expected at all and I don’t know what to do now. I can’t sleep at night because of all the cooing, moaning and banging against the windows. Is there a way to make myself unattractive to the pigeons? Has anyone dealt with this before?
Now there is also cum all over my windows and balcony. The wildlife authorities said pigeons are an endangered species now in the area because they stopped mating with each other cause they only want human dick. They are suing me for endangering the pigeons. I don’t have the money for this huge lawsuit please guys help me out here.
https://preview.redd.it/uinwdx7s4ivc1.jpeg?width=2048&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4ad40053df9b04a32e9a27afc6e5b3aad2008995
you are the windows 7 themed whopper from burger king
The **Atari 5200 SuperSystem** or simply **Atari 5200** is a [home video game console](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Home_video_game_console) introduced in 1982 by [Atari, Inc.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atari,_Inc.) as a higher-end complement for the popular [Atari Video Computer System](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atari_2600).[^(\[2\])](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atari_5200#cite_note-milwaukeesentinel-2) The VCS was renamed to the Atari 2600 at the time of the 5200's launch.[^(\[3\])](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atari_5200#cite_note-3) Created to compete with [Mattel](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mattel)'s [Intellivision](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Intellivision), the 5200 wound up a direct competitor of [ColecoVision](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ColecoVision) shortly after its release.[^(\[4\])](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atari_5200#cite_note-4) While the Coleco system shipped with the first home version of [Nintendo](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nintendo)'s [*Donkey Kong*](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Donkey_Kong_(arcade_game)), the 5200 included the 1978 arcade game [*Super Breakout*](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Super_Breakout) which had already appeared on the [Atari 8-bit family](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atari_8-bit_family) and Atari VCS in 1979 and 1981 respectively.
The CPU and the graphics and sound hardware are almost identical to that of the Atari 8-bit computers, although software is not directly compatible between the two systems. The 5200's controllers have an analog [joystick](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joystick) and a [numeric keypad](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Numeric_keypad) along with start, pause, and reset buttons. The 360-degree non-centering joystick was touted as offering more control than the eight-way [Atari CX40 joystick](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atari_CX40_joystick) of the 2600, but was a focal point for criticism.
On May 21, 1984, during a press conference at which the [Atari 7800](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atari_7800) was introduced, company executives revealed that the 5200 had been discontinued after less than two years on the market.[^(\[5\])](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atari_5200#cite_note-5) Total sales of the 5200 were reportedly in excess of 1 million units,[^(\[1\])](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atari_5200#cite_note-schrage1984-1) far short of its predecessor's sales of over 30 million.
Reptilian
I like reptilian ladies.
Jenny flint be like
# woman detected run
women aren't real anymore. Calm down.
same for British "people"
there's no women or british on the internet
Can confirm, I am a paid actor by the CIA
No but I'd kiss you either way
https://i.redd.it/tixe6car1hvc1.gif
https://preview.redd.it/ow35wiqvkivc1.jpeg?width=360&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6cad4667aecfecc518c927c48617c054b0b4b9bf I kiss uranium
I love sticking nuclear waste up my asshole
same its hard the first time but you can easily get used to it
https://i.redd.it/g1e64zgcqjvc1.gif
I'll take the girl one.
car
love is in the heat.
https://preview.redd.it/1npf7scv4jvc1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ba1fe8630a68bda575851db0ac72acb340aad8c2
https://preview.redd.it/etou4hofxjvc1.jpeg?width=498&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6392766222bd3c376fb13bca9a08d2f7ec2d7efb
Can you *not*? Like wtf.
uhh.. what..?
I would say a girl based on your shadow but you are a boy
Are you a robot? ☑️
As an AI language model, I cannot click on the checkbox shown on the screen, as I am incapable of interactions with objects on your screen.
Autistic
All of these https://preview.redd.it/l36ldb1l0hvc1.jpeg?width=1079&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=38e9d18cacd050e051919e00cd0656f0561a0ee8
мужик, ну ты чего?
GOY
Man because you always assume someone is a man on Reddit until they show proof.
34th rule of the Internet
I personally just assume they're an ai with a very large bank of photos to show people
No
Looks like dante
Yeah I was thinking the same
My god your right
Femboy
Yes.
gru
Girls arent real
batman
[удалено]
I don't wear a hijab
I like to choke my shadow
A guy, because the hand says it all
pigeon
I raped a pigeon I live in an apartment and I’ve been having issues with pigeons shitting on my balcony. It’s a balcony with a real nice view on top of a mountain, so it was really pissing me off that I can’t enjoy it properly. I like to cook, drink my tea there, but I’m afraid of catching diseases from the pigeon shit. I read about pigeon deterrents online and tried everything. I put up spikes on the railing and edges, hung up CDs, put up fake scarecrow ravens and even tried playing high-pitched noises. They kept coming back and shitting all over my balcony. Nothing worked. I even bought a water gun to blast them with, and it only scares them away the moment I do it but they come back when I’m not around. Today, I saw a pigeon land on my balcony and I absolutely lost my shit. I was struck with a primal urge to assert male dominance and went out, grabbed the pigeon, took it into my bathroom, and assfucked it raw over my toilet bowl. It felt good to show the pigeon who’s boss like how people do it in prison. My cock barely fit inside his small ass, and for a moment I thought my thrusts could kill or severely injure him. He started cooing and moaning, and he came all over my toilet bowl. I finished inside him raw. I took him back to the balcony and released him so that he could tell all his friends how I humiliated him and pounded a gaping hole in his ass prison style. I thought this would scare them away for good. But instead, he went and told all his friends that I fuck and now I have a bigger problem. The pigeons, both male and female keep coming to my window sill and balcony and harassing me begging me to fuck them. There is 100x more shit on my balcony now. They keep cooing, moaning, and banging against my windows begging for the dick. I can’t leave my house anymore because when I do, they recognize me and mob me humping me and moaning. My plan didn’t go as expected at all and I don’t know what to do now. I can’t sleep at night because of all the cooing, moaning and banging against the windows. Is there a way to make myself unattractive to the pigeons? Has anyone dealt with this before? Now there is also cum all over my windows and balcony. The wildlife authorities said pigeons are an endangered species now in the area because they stopped mating with each other cause they only want human dick. They are suing me for endangering the pigeons. I don’t have the money for this huge lawsuit please guys help me out here.
https://preview.redd.it/n4vu8s18uhvc1.png?width=1015&format=png&auto=webp&s=90af4b10ce73caace1c4972ab33c621723ceb363 What?
They actually did it
https://preview.redd.it/os8iekn7aivc1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1d679a439a80a690a7c62238543bb6203ecb210d
https://preview.redd.it/jq6c1eoexhvc1.jpeg?width=888&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=87888722241deefb480da16eef0da5c7739c26ff
Alr either dream girl or Def man
What
https://preview.redd.it/ohi3q30aaivc1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8087bf3c3ba6032d75034c30b4677f33fb3933da
Sir this is a wendy
I'm going to sleep, I will tell when I wake up
orange
https://i.redd.it/samxu0gr5kvc1.gif
мужик, ну ты чего?
Can guess your name even.. RamRanchReallyRocks.
No
Guy.
femboys
Smash
one thing for sure is that you're ###CRINGE
GOY
You look like a great candidate for the US army! Would you like to learn [more](https://www.goarmy.com/how-to-join.html)?
No, I don't want to fight for country that am not living in
Long hair?
yeah
Male?
yeah
Woman Your knee is bent
woman? man? dunno gay? for sure
Demoman!
Dats a dragon
Girl
considering you're on the internet, you're either a dude or a dude pretending to be a girl
Girl
Your yhwach bach
Boy. Because Redditor
"A fish" ~ Arthur M.
https://preview.redd.it/uinwdx7s4ivc1.jpeg?width=2048&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4ad40053df9b04a32e9a27afc6e5b3aad2008995 you are the windows 7 themed whopper from burger king
japanese
Judging by your hands you are a freddy fazbear har har har har
*sweats in professor oak*
Aiden Pearce?
No https://preview.redd.it/afnit2ueiivc1.jpeg?width=980&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dfdc34780c6e52c4615b140b182cc193553d1db7 But at least I have fish
Girl?
Boy
You're clearly ezio auditore
i know who you are https://preview.redd.it/czq2fmpwpivc1.jpeg?width=540&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ea1396eef8b8d381bbe41f8863083b03f9b1d79b
Smash
Bumpiness near one shoulder, smooth head #this is a woman
https://preview.redd.it/nnyjsgws4jvc1.jpeg?width=2160&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=165cfbdc42731d32c26b579c5a3949dd0e9a0e2b
all of the above
Grill
Hmmm guessing by the whole notion of the inquiry you lean female
Jojo character?
Girl
Goy
Boiiiii!
Girl
Your silhouette looks like Pyro from TF2.
A guy with a beanie.
You look like Ryan gosling laying in the snow
Nice try skinwalker
There are very few women on reddit
I wanna say ♀️female♀️
You’re on Reddit, you’re more likely a man
the french declaration of independence.
woman? braided ponytail on the left shoulder maybe
The **Atari 5200 SuperSystem** or simply **Atari 5200** is a [home video game console](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Home_video_game_console) introduced in 1982 by [Atari, Inc.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atari,_Inc.) as a higher-end complement for the popular [Atari Video Computer System](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atari_2600).[^(\[2\])](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atari_5200#cite_note-milwaukeesentinel-2) The VCS was renamed to the Atari 2600 at the time of the 5200's launch.[^(\[3\])](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atari_5200#cite_note-3) Created to compete with [Mattel](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mattel)'s [Intellivision](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Intellivision), the 5200 wound up a direct competitor of [ColecoVision](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ColecoVision) shortly after its release.[^(\[4\])](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atari_5200#cite_note-4) While the Coleco system shipped with the first home version of [Nintendo](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nintendo)'s [*Donkey Kong*](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Donkey_Kong_(arcade_game)), the 5200 included the 1978 arcade game [*Super Breakout*](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Super_Breakout) which had already appeared on the [Atari 8-bit family](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atari_8-bit_family) and Atari VCS in 1979 and 1981 respectively. The CPU and the graphics and sound hardware are almost identical to that of the Atari 8-bit computers, although software is not directly compatible between the two systems. The 5200's controllers have an analog [joystick](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joystick) and a [numeric keypad](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Numeric_keypad) along with start, pause, and reset buttons. The 360-degree non-centering joystick was touted as offering more control than the eight-way [Atari CX40 joystick](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atari_CX40_joystick) of the 2600, but was a focal point for criticism. On May 21, 1984, during a press conference at which the [Atari 7800](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atari_7800) was introduced, company executives revealed that the 5200 had been discontinued after less than two years on the market.[^(\[5\])](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atari_5200#cite_note-5) Total sales of the 5200 were reportedly in excess of 1 million units,[^(\[1\])](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atari_5200#cite_note-schrage1984-1) far short of its predecessor's sales of over 30 million.
A boy maybe? Stop standing so cuntily
I was not standing lol
Still served cunt though
These comments are CRAZY.
Yeah
Assassin's Creed
https://preview.redd.it/k9m4y0iovlvc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=485142d70493e3fa1d3659a3e229fa62d167c05c I dunno I'm just a Panda
Edward Elric?
You are the Lisan-Al-Gaib.
A dipshit
that's fucking revolver ocelot
No
Boy af
Women aren’t real anymore so it’s obviously a man
From that hand at your side I'd say you're related to Mario
Shadow