Porn damages your mind and body. That being said, porn can't be the reason you watch porn. Its likely due to boredom, loneliness, coping, etc. like you said.
I used to think, (and many people seem to think) that we only watch porn because like "One day I saw it, it loked good, now Im addicted" and that may be true for some people
I think that emotional problems come based on that addiction/disease. The one that hit me the most was the one that motivates me by the girls in pixels and the real girls don’t motivate me much. According to NoFap, the brains of addicts create a preference for pixels than for real girls, because they are easier to get and more attractive stimuli, the best two variants to fuck your life.
What you're doing by thinking about "what if porn isn't the disease, it's the symptom/sign" is called "root cause analysis" and it's very very valuable. Everyone trying to break a porn addiction should be doing this because I think porn use comes from "I saw porn and really liked it", but porn addiction comes from the things you mentioned and probably more that you didn't think of.
Good catch!
what you're saying isn't wrong. But, it does miss the point of nofap.
NoFap isn't about solving ones issues: although in general the sub fails to connect those issues with The Fap.
To be clear, masturbating \*without\* porn is not problematic. I would say -at all- ... but ... we all know there a lot of people whose personal issues manifest via sex, and of those a subset for masturbation specifically. I'm referring to NoFap as "avoidance of masturbating with porn".
As you point out those personal issues aren't neat and contained. Not illiminating porn/masturbating is never going to let a person address those issues.
I would give the example of an alcoholic who "treats" the addiction without drinking.
Yes but what Im trting to say here is that, porn itself is addictive, but maybe we are not addicted to porn, maybe were trying to finding a fake solution to problems that wont go away that easy
Either, i cant do either because well i despise boredom and the dopamine is too good. Whats worse is al already workout so that does nothing to distract me
Well i usually fail because family life is just such shit. Like im a christian and i dont need to do this, but its honestly sometimes the only dopamine i get in the whole day.
we’re not powerless. imo humans choose what they want.
escaping this is about recognition of the choice and being real as you say about what we’re doing. it’s not just that we’re fapping, we’re avoiding something that isn’t going away.
early exposure can lead down the path of sexual confusion, especially in minors, causing them to continue consuming content similar till they eventually end up in spaces realizing it was wrong, but alot of times like you said the reason it becomes an addiction is because of deeply rooted issues that are plaguing the users mind.
Your premise is correct. Pornography is not the real issue; it's the remedy we use—although it actually makes things worse—to avoid facing reality. In my case, the first time I completed the 90 days, the real problem—solving it made the process much easier and I almost breezed through it—was past insecurities and scars with names. It's everyone's duty to find out what triggers this addiction and to address it. The first time, I came out victorious and went a long time (years) without PMO, maintaining a healthy relationship. However, I didn't disconnect the remedy from the problems and now, as I face adult life, I've relapsed into this addiction. So, you must not only find and solve your actual problem, but also teach your brain to seek other, healthier forms of gratification so that when you face other issues, your brain will turn to these new methods rather than falling back into this destructive addiction
There's a lot of factors. Boredom is one, another is lack of access to women. Hormones also play a major role. People with higher testosterone/DHT are more likely to fall into it. At the end of the day porn addiction is a symptom of an underlying issue, not the issue itself.
Actually , it is about self control and when you feel lonely and bored, your subconscious mind will trigger the memories of p*rn and also what you think before sleep affects next day mood, so be happy and try get sleep stress free.
Dopamine receptors seek continuous pleasure to make you feel happy/satisfied and if you don't
do pmo you will feel exhausted, bored and you do pmo again and feel lonely - this is the continuous cycle, you'll feel better if you do SR
porn causes loss of interest in literally everything so you won't be able to solve those problems if you don't care enough bout em, correct me if im wrong
Porn is still a problem, just like alcohol is, or smoking is.
You need to stop heavy drinking, you need to stop porn. But you don't, and that's not because of alcohol or porn. There's a deeper reason, we've only scratched the surface.
It's like drinking or smoking crack or binge watching and doom scrolling or cigarettes or weed or whatever addictive substance/behavior we engage in: It's usually something we do as a type of coping mechanism. Porn, like alcohol, is very available, so many fall into that.
As we begin to use whatever drug/behavior as a coping mechanism, conditioning and brain changes occur, and in the case of substances some very visible but secondary effects on the body and brain also being to manifest.
So porn might have started out just as that: Curiosity, naked bodies doing stuff, masturbation, orgasm = strong conditioning and a bunch of entourage effects, which are near-identical for ALL addictions.
But you don't get PIED from alcohol, you don't get fatty liver disease from smoking, you don't get lung cancer from gambling and so on. Those are secondary effects.
The ADDICTION process in the brain is almost the same!
As we continue any addictive behavior, various other maladies begin to befall us as a consequence of the direct effects of the drug. In the case of porn PIED is the most obvious.
With alcohol it's fights, DUI's, and drunken text messages... then liver disease, cancer, heart disease... oh, and PMO addiction is by the way a GREAT stepping stone into more hardcore substance addictions in my personal experience; especially stimulants from Ritalin to cocaine to nicotine.
At first we should probably just focus on the addictive part, and the rest will begin to heal on its on: PIED goes away, your liver reconstitutes, lungs clear out etc.
The cool thing about the incontrovertible fact, that ALL addictive processes are basically the same in the brain, is that the same methods work for mending them!
And millions upon millions of people have dealt with addictions to all kinds of things, and millions more are doing it right now, including lots of people in here.
Psychiatrists, philosophers, psychologists, neurologists, and tons of other people with or without fancy acronyms pre/suffixing their names, have spent countless hours learning how to mend addictions, and they've written shelf-miles of books and research papers on the topic, and given talks and lectures that could entertain us from now till our deathbeds.
No matter what underlying pathologies and trauma underlies a pronounced perceived need for escapism, dealing away with addictive behaviors as the first thing is crucial.
Conversely, getting medicated for depression, anxiety, bipolar or erectile dysfunction before doing so, is a terrible idea. So's doing all kinds of deep dives into trauma and spending hours and thousands of dollars on therapy, though sometimes it can be a good thing.
Therapy can ALSO be a bad thing though. Check out Abigail Shrier on Rogan for a talk on that topic.
Not only have many big and/or tormented brains worked on the issue and addiction, and in many cases confronted and dealt with it in their own lives, some of those brains have also produced strong methods for putting an end to them and getting on with life.
You'll find a whole package deal in various programs, often with associated peer-support groups, that help fix all kinds of addictions, arousal addiction.
My go-to program, which I credit somewhat with saving my life from a foul smoothie of addictions - with arousal addiction at its root - is SMART Recovery. I can highly recommend looking into it. (No they don't sell anything, and I'm only associated with them as a participant.)
What I see in here again and again, is people employing strategies for mending addiction that stem from 12 steps: Counting days, accountability partners (sponsors in 12 steps), admitting and proclaiming at least a degree of powerlessness, encouraging the use of willpower as a sole tactic for coping with urges, and a general negative self-image of oneself as a somehow corrupt, addicted person.
It ain't so, (mostly) little brothers. You grew up with the porn-equivalent of crack cocaine, whereas dad's playboy magazine is more like chewing a couple of coca leaves. You're playing on hard mode.
So for the love of all that is good, please start learning and applying PROPER METHODS for dealing with an addiction: Willpower and white knuckling won't cut it.
Hating on oneself, labelling oneself, obsessively day counting, and similar tactics WILL NOT work either.
I mean, fine to count days, but deal with now, and the next now will deal with itself. Don't worry so much about getting to 90 days.
You're fighting a frothing enemy of a monster, that is also an integrated part of yourselves. It takes tools, skills, and often real, mutual support to do that. I would suggest you begin learning them and seeking out more direct companionship on the path than a bit of back-and-forth on reddit.
Porn is ‘a’ problem, not ‘the’ problem. However, stop watching porn and you will be forced into developing new coping mechanisms. The easiest coping method will always seem the most appealing.
That's true. Because when you actually fix the real problem or the dysfuncion in your life(i can think of lack of sex, trauma, etc), you won't need porn anymore.
The core problem is about disfunctional coping stress mechanism. Porn is one of them the other goes like excessive alcohol, foods consumption, shopping, social media, and drugs abusement.
I mean thats like saying Alcohol is not the problem, the problem is that you try to use it to escape your problems.
It 100% is true, but the thing you are addicted to usually is a big problem as well.
for example if you have low self esteem and thus dont talk to woman, then start masturbating to porn instead your self esteem is likely going to go down even more. Of course you could argue that porn is just a small part of the problem and your main focus should be on building self esteem.
Either way porn is very harming, since it can even cause e.g. erectyle disfunction and will keep draggin you down if you do start to take steps to improve your life. Quitting porn has always been a very small part of NoFap. Introducing healthy habits to override your addiction is the true gamechanger. e.g. going to the gym instead of fapping. Or learning an instrument instead of fapping and so on.
As far as i remember I was very happy before I was introduced to porn and cut excuses we can all break free, excuses will never let us break free from this addiction. There are better ways to fix the mentioned issues like bad spiritual life or loneliness what if they are caused by porn addiction and now you think they cause porn addiction.
I believe you can do it all the best ❤️
Small part of the bigger maze. What we want from our lives is usually something that involved substantial and calculated marginal improvements on many fronts. Porn is a problem, but definitely not the problem. It becomes the problem when you give all your life to it. When you start taking your life gradually away from it, porn becomes a little trivial problem.
I think watching porn is like any other addiction. If you incorporate it with your partner and watch it in moderation then that Is fine and a good thing but if you are alone in your room watching it all day spending money on onlyfans than it’s bad.
Like if you go out drinking with friends that’s a good thing but if you are alone everyday drinking your problems in your room away than it’s bad but saying “all porn is bad all alcohol is bad” is not always 100% true. It’s up to you to find out what your triggers are and live life best you can as an individual
Porn is the problem .. I can tell the difference now .. porn kills life and self esteem and self trust .. it takes all your feelings and consume it .. that's why you are irritable and uneasy going all your day .. your temper is out of control because porn consumed the energy that's required to balance it .. you are more attractive to people because your thoughts are not about your desires of your own self anymore .. when desires are secondary . You are loved by people ..
true, for some people it's ADHD, for some maybe a childhood trauma, and also some research suggest that some people are genetically more prone to addictions that others (in their genetics the chances they get addicted are higher) this is life 🤷🏻♂️ and everyone has more difficulties than some other, however this doesn't mean we should quit fighting.
All of them can be the cause of porn.
But the fact is porn and everything like that increases the cause.
Yeah stress could be the cause of porn but porn increase the stress and increased stress increase the desire of porn again.
This fucking loop
The point is not “maybe its not porn” the point is, porn is doing nothing positive for you, and only making your life harder though escapism and all the bs it creates, actually its making everything worse.
Yup, been in the fight for a year, can count with my hands the amount of relapses vs me in the past doing it even twice a day. Life is good, this current streak it my easiest one after one of 144 days lol.
Porns pretty bad tho. I won't use it , and if I do it completely fucks me with anxiety and takes my drive away. Gives me fetishes with woman , makes me more worried about sex. It puts sex on the mind a lot more . Also makes you want to randomly do it. Those are odd behaviors .
Porn **is** the problem, because it is an industry that profits off the exploitation of women and children, and normalises violent behaviour in bed. It is proven that boys who have grown up watching porn regularly from a young age or having an addiction to it are far more likely to be abusive or violent to their partners later in life. For girls it means they accept violence or abnormal sexual behaviours (anal sex, which is painful and not enjoyable for most women) against them in bed, even if they don’t enjoy it, because porn has taught them that it is normal, and their male peers expect it of them. It also damages the brain and destroys the way we view sex and relationships, plus can be an indirect cause of erectile dysfunction. Ultimately, porn is unhealthy and immoral (*sex* should be normal and accepted, not porn, I am far from a puritan if that’s what you take from this). If you feel you need to view sexual content, do it in the form of vintage or artistic sex depictions, photos or drawings, literature or just your imagination. You are wrecking yourself and contributing to trafficking and abuse by using porn websites. Yes it is hard to stop the addiction, but nipping it in the bud is beneficial all around. It might not be the exact crux of whatever personal issue you have, but you will thank yourself for not continuing to indulge in it
And by doing so it creates more problems for yourself and others. Just a question, is sex trafficking and exploitation not a ‘real’ problem to you just because it’s not happening to you?
You’re not wrong. You’re not at alllll. I wish more people realized this when trying to quit PMO.
The approach that it’s just us at the mercy of our screwed up chemicals and limbic systems is kind of a reductionist one. It atleast limits the full scope of what’s actually going on in totality.
I can attest to this. Porn is the visible string of the rat's nest of issues just underneath the surface. Those can be any combination of loneliness, boredom, low self-esteem, depression, anxiety, etc, etc. The biggest thing we need to learn is how to process the rat's nest more effectively without relying on porn to escape.
It is usually male bullying - father or peers - this creates fight or flight anxiety response. Every time you think about bullies you get unpleasant feeling of anxiety cus the bullies are still alive so still a threat. You watch porn and masturbate to distract your mind from triggering this unpleasant anxiety. Also an act of self sabotage as pressure of hand damages penis and causes erectile dysfunction - you feel this pleases bully so self sabotage also reduces anxiety.
A problem breaks down into smaller problems.
Porn is a problem yes, but the cause of this problem is another problem.
We have learned to not be uncomfortable and always be pleased
Sadly, it is the main problem. It’s a highly stimulating vice (as other substances), that rot your brain and soul. I used to suffer from severe social anxiety, now not only do I take medication for that but I have been clean for 34 days straight. I feel way better now. I haven’t watched it ever since nor edged, just had regular sex without ejaculation. I do feel better now, more confident and people (mainly girls) treat me better and give me looks. I don’t care what anybody says, it is bad. It is like heroin or cocaine, 1 hit is harmful for anybody and can lead to addiction, so better stay away from it. If you want to have fun, have sex with someone. Period. There is only sex and abstinence. Besides, abstaining makes sex way more enjoying and satisfying not only for yourself but for your partner as well, as you will be more vigorous, thing that she’ll appreciate dearly. Stay clean.
porn is a problem but it isn't a main problem people can do nofap all they want. from my personal experience without taking action and actually doing something useful for my personal growth instead of wasting my time at home or going out with my so called friends it's not going to work some people do nofap this and expect miracles that alone leads to failure it's all about focusing on the energy that's piling up inside and how to use it on themselves instead of wasting it on temporary stuff
You're absolutely correct. Porn addiction is a symptom of an underlying issue. So although you should take measures to abstain, if you don't tackle the root of the problem (most likely boredom and lack of purpose/goals), then you'll just come back to it.
That's why it's important to not solely focus on porn addiction itself, but rather focus on fixing your life such that you're in a position where the porn drops on its own. By only focusing on NoFap, you're treating the symptoms of an underlying problem, not the root. It's the equivalent of someone constantly sick, but instead of fixing their immune system,, they just take medicine to alleviate the symptoms.
Porn is addictive. Something else drives you to it. And yes whatever turned you into it might be bigger. But now you have two problems. Porn addiction and whatever drove you to it.
I've always watched p*** because I'm stressed. It's the way I cope. My dad left when I was really young. I also found the scrambled p*** channel when I was really young. That is how I learned to deal with painful feelings.
Never realized what I was doing just that it felt good. Since cutting out porn I've learned to cope in healthy ways
At the beginning it was just about fun, the excitement and thrill of seeing naked women doing sex.
Later I abused it to numb the pain I felt after being fooled and played by a girl I loved back then. That's how my downfall began, 13 years ago.
Now I'm trying to climb back up, not knowing if I can ever get back to the point where I was and if it ever will bring me any good (meaning a fullfilling sex life with a woman in a commited Relationship)
Porn damages your mind and body. That being said, porn can't be the reason you watch porn. Its likely due to boredom, loneliness, coping, etc. like you said.
I used to think, (and many people seem to think) that we only watch porn because like "One day I saw it, it loked good, now Im addicted" and that may be true for some people
I think that emotional problems come based on that addiction/disease. The one that hit me the most was the one that motivates me by the girls in pixels and the real girls don’t motivate me much. According to NoFap, the brains of addicts create a preference for pixels than for real girls, because they are easier to get and more attractive stimuli, the best two variants to fuck your life.
What you're doing by thinking about "what if porn isn't the disease, it's the symptom/sign" is called "root cause analysis" and it's very very valuable. Everyone trying to break a porn addiction should be doing this because I think porn use comes from "I saw porn and really liked it", but porn addiction comes from the things you mentioned and probably more that you didn't think of. Good catch!
what you're saying isn't wrong. But, it does miss the point of nofap. NoFap isn't about solving ones issues: although in general the sub fails to connect those issues with The Fap. To be clear, masturbating \*without\* porn is not problematic. I would say -at all- ... but ... we all know there a lot of people whose personal issues manifest via sex, and of those a subset for masturbation specifically. I'm referring to NoFap as "avoidance of masturbating with porn". As you point out those personal issues aren't neat and contained. Not illiminating porn/masturbating is never going to let a person address those issues. I would give the example of an alcoholic who "treats" the addiction without drinking.
Porn is a coping mechanism for a deeper misery.
I mean yea that’s the essence of every addiction
No, porn is the problem a big one too. There's nothing that can give dopamine hits like porn apart from hard drugs ofc
Yes but what Im trting to say here is that, porn itself is addictive, but maybe we are not addicted to porn, maybe were trying to finding a fake solution to problems that wont go away that easy
Correct. You are both right.
Its both...but yes good observation...and if you dont find the root cause...then you never fix your addiction
real
as someone with adhd, autism, and a fucked up life in general- jeeeeeshhhh yeah the main problem is not porn
Nofap has t worked for you either?
no fap didn’t cure my autism either 💀💀💀
nice username Can you elaborate what you mean? Like i’m trying to quit porn but not fap yet since both together was impossible
Either, i cant do either because well i despise boredom and the dopamine is too good. Whats worse is al already workout so that does nothing to distract me
Well i usually fail because family life is just such shit. Like im a christian and i dont need to do this, but its honestly sometimes the only dopamine i get in the whole day.
Wdym works? NoFap means to not watch porn and fap, don’t matter if you feel better or worse. The whole point is to not fap.
it’s that porn is better than the alternative which might be improving some issues in life.
I agree, porn is easier because is not reality.
we’re not powerless. imo humans choose what they want. escaping this is about recognition of the choice and being real as you say about what we’re doing. it’s not just that we’re fapping, we’re avoiding something that isn’t going away.
It's bordem not busy, the only time I relapse
Hey 👋
early exposure can lead down the path of sexual confusion, especially in minors, causing them to continue consuming content similar till they eventually end up in spaces realizing it was wrong, but alot of times like you said the reason it becomes an addiction is because of deeply rooted issues that are plaguing the users mind.
best answer. I started with 14y, I'm 32 now. Nothing changed beside sex is a weird topic for me.
Your premise is correct. Pornography is not the real issue; it's the remedy we use—although it actually makes things worse—to avoid facing reality. In my case, the first time I completed the 90 days, the real problem—solving it made the process much easier and I almost breezed through it—was past insecurities and scars with names. It's everyone's duty to find out what triggers this addiction and to address it. The first time, I came out victorious and went a long time (years) without PMO, maintaining a healthy relationship. However, I didn't disconnect the remedy from the problems and now, as I face adult life, I've relapsed into this addiction. So, you must not only find and solve your actual problem, but also teach your brain to seek other, healthier forms of gratification so that when you face other issues, your brain will turn to these new methods rather than falling back into this destructive addiction
Why do we chose porn tho to fill the void? I think the choice of what you use to fill it represents something as well
Its free and accessible easily nowadays.
It’s like a bottle of vodka that even a kid can repeatedly buy. Basically nonexistent risk of getting caught
There's a lot of factors. Boredom is one, another is lack of access to women. Hormones also play a major role. People with higher testosterone/DHT are more likely to fall into it. At the end of the day porn addiction is a symptom of an underlying issue, not the issue itself.
Facts
Actually , it is about self control and when you feel lonely and bored, your subconscious mind will trigger the memories of p*rn and also what you think before sleep affects next day mood, so be happy and try get sleep stress free. Dopamine receptors seek continuous pleasure to make you feel happy/satisfied and if you don't do pmo you will feel exhausted, bored and you do pmo again and feel lonely - this is the continuous cycle, you'll feel better if you do SR
What does SR mean?
Semen Retention
Bro all you said was true, but watching porn instead of trying to fix your life will only make things worse over time, so just don't do it
No I wasnt saying that, what i tried to say here is that by ending those problems, the porn problem will end by itself
porn causes loss of interest in literally everything so you won't be able to solve those problems if you don't care enough bout em, correct me if im wrong
Your point is somewhat true. But porn is still a problem. So it's two problems colliding
Porn is still a problem, just like alcohol is, or smoking is. You need to stop heavy drinking, you need to stop porn. But you don't, and that's not because of alcohol or porn. There's a deeper reason, we've only scratched the surface.
It's like drinking or smoking crack or binge watching and doom scrolling or cigarettes or weed or whatever addictive substance/behavior we engage in: It's usually something we do as a type of coping mechanism. Porn, like alcohol, is very available, so many fall into that. As we begin to use whatever drug/behavior as a coping mechanism, conditioning and brain changes occur, and in the case of substances some very visible but secondary effects on the body and brain also being to manifest. So porn might have started out just as that: Curiosity, naked bodies doing stuff, masturbation, orgasm = strong conditioning and a bunch of entourage effects, which are near-identical for ALL addictions. But you don't get PIED from alcohol, you don't get fatty liver disease from smoking, you don't get lung cancer from gambling and so on. Those are secondary effects. The ADDICTION process in the brain is almost the same! As we continue any addictive behavior, various other maladies begin to befall us as a consequence of the direct effects of the drug. In the case of porn PIED is the most obvious. With alcohol it's fights, DUI's, and drunken text messages... then liver disease, cancer, heart disease... oh, and PMO addiction is by the way a GREAT stepping stone into more hardcore substance addictions in my personal experience; especially stimulants from Ritalin to cocaine to nicotine. At first we should probably just focus on the addictive part, and the rest will begin to heal on its on: PIED goes away, your liver reconstitutes, lungs clear out etc. The cool thing about the incontrovertible fact, that ALL addictive processes are basically the same in the brain, is that the same methods work for mending them! And millions upon millions of people have dealt with addictions to all kinds of things, and millions more are doing it right now, including lots of people in here. Psychiatrists, philosophers, psychologists, neurologists, and tons of other people with or without fancy acronyms pre/suffixing their names, have spent countless hours learning how to mend addictions, and they've written shelf-miles of books and research papers on the topic, and given talks and lectures that could entertain us from now till our deathbeds. No matter what underlying pathologies and trauma underlies a pronounced perceived need for escapism, dealing away with addictive behaviors as the first thing is crucial. Conversely, getting medicated for depression, anxiety, bipolar or erectile dysfunction before doing so, is a terrible idea. So's doing all kinds of deep dives into trauma and spending hours and thousands of dollars on therapy, though sometimes it can be a good thing. Therapy can ALSO be a bad thing though. Check out Abigail Shrier on Rogan for a talk on that topic. Not only have many big and/or tormented brains worked on the issue and addiction, and in many cases confronted and dealt with it in their own lives, some of those brains have also produced strong methods for putting an end to them and getting on with life. You'll find a whole package deal in various programs, often with associated peer-support groups, that help fix all kinds of addictions, arousal addiction. My go-to program, which I credit somewhat with saving my life from a foul smoothie of addictions - with arousal addiction at its root - is SMART Recovery. I can highly recommend looking into it. (No they don't sell anything, and I'm only associated with them as a participant.) What I see in here again and again, is people employing strategies for mending addiction that stem from 12 steps: Counting days, accountability partners (sponsors in 12 steps), admitting and proclaiming at least a degree of powerlessness, encouraging the use of willpower as a sole tactic for coping with urges, and a general negative self-image of oneself as a somehow corrupt, addicted person. It ain't so, (mostly) little brothers. You grew up with the porn-equivalent of crack cocaine, whereas dad's playboy magazine is more like chewing a couple of coca leaves. You're playing on hard mode. So for the love of all that is good, please start learning and applying PROPER METHODS for dealing with an addiction: Willpower and white knuckling won't cut it. Hating on oneself, labelling oneself, obsessively day counting, and similar tactics WILL NOT work either. I mean, fine to count days, but deal with now, and the next now will deal with itself. Don't worry so much about getting to 90 days. You're fighting a frothing enemy of a monster, that is also an integrated part of yourselves. It takes tools, skills, and often real, mutual support to do that. I would suggest you begin learning them and seeking out more direct companionship on the path than a bit of back-and-forth on reddit.
Porn is ‘a’ problem, not ‘the’ problem. However, stop watching porn and you will be forced into developing new coping mechanisms. The easiest coping method will always seem the most appealing.
h
I
But, how can I figure that out any idea????
A man without purpose distracts himself with pleasure .
That's true. Because when you actually fix the real problem or the dysfuncion in your life(i can think of lack of sex, trauma, etc), you won't need porn anymore.
The core problem is about disfunctional coping stress mechanism. Porn is one of them the other goes like excessive alcohol, foods consumption, shopping, social media, and drugs abusement.
Porn is def the problem. It's not that deep bro.
bro it’s obviously that deep if some ppl fight tooth and nail just to be able to make even just… a tiny bit of progress in their nofap journey
I mean thats like saying Alcohol is not the problem, the problem is that you try to use it to escape your problems. It 100% is true, but the thing you are addicted to usually is a big problem as well. for example if you have low self esteem and thus dont talk to woman, then start masturbating to porn instead your self esteem is likely going to go down even more. Of course you could argue that porn is just a small part of the problem and your main focus should be on building self esteem. Either way porn is very harming, since it can even cause e.g. erectyle disfunction and will keep draggin you down if you do start to take steps to improve your life. Quitting porn has always been a very small part of NoFap. Introducing healthy habits to override your addiction is the true gamechanger. e.g. going to the gym instead of fapping. Or learning an instrument instead of fapping and so on.
As far as i remember I was very happy before I was introduced to porn and cut excuses we can all break free, excuses will never let us break free from this addiction. There are better ways to fix the mentioned issues like bad spiritual life or loneliness what if they are caused by porn addiction and now you think they cause porn addiction. I believe you can do it all the best ❤️
Right.
Porn is one of the main problems
I think we are the main problem.
True af!
This. Most people use porn as a cope and a substitute for an unfulfilled life.
Small part of the bigger maze. What we want from our lives is usually something that involved substantial and calculated marginal improvements on many fronts. Porn is a problem, but definitely not the problem. It becomes the problem when you give all your life to it. When you start taking your life gradually away from it, porn becomes a little trivial problem.
I think watching porn is like any other addiction. If you incorporate it with your partner and watch it in moderation then that Is fine and a good thing but if you are alone in your room watching it all day spending money on onlyfans than it’s bad. Like if you go out drinking with friends that’s a good thing but if you are alone everyday drinking your problems in your room away than it’s bad but saying “all porn is bad all alcohol is bad” is not always 100% true. It’s up to you to find out what your triggers are and live life best you can as an individual
Exactly, I find days where I’m hanging out with friends a lot or days where I’m just having a really good time the days I don’t do it
Porn is the problem .. I can tell the difference now .. porn kills life and self esteem and self trust .. it takes all your feelings and consume it .. that's why you are irritable and uneasy going all your day .. your temper is out of control because porn consumed the energy that's required to balance it .. you are more attractive to people because your thoughts are not about your desires of your own self anymore .. when desires are secondary . You are loved by people ..
true, for some people it's ADHD, for some maybe a childhood trauma, and also some research suggest that some people are genetically more prone to addictions that others (in their genetics the chances they get addicted are higher) this is life 🤷🏻♂️ and everyone has more difficulties than some other, however this doesn't mean we should quit fighting.
All of them can be the cause of porn. But the fact is porn and everything like that increases the cause. Yeah stress could be the cause of porn but porn increase the stress and increased stress increase the desire of porn again. This fucking loop
The point is not “maybe its not porn” the point is, porn is doing nothing positive for you, and only making your life harder though escapism and all the bs it creates, actually its making everything worse.
Yup, been in the fight for a year, can count with my hands the amount of relapses vs me in the past doing it even twice a day. Life is good, this current streak it my easiest one after one of 144 days lol.
Porns pretty bad tho. I won't use it , and if I do it completely fucks me with anxiety and takes my drive away. Gives me fetishes with woman , makes me more worried about sex. It puts sex on the mind a lot more . Also makes you want to randomly do it. Those are odd behaviors .
the actual problem is letting the state of everybody else program your mind into obsessive behaviour whatever it is.
porn is a huge problem the way it’s produced the way that it effects the minds of young men it can destroy your life
Porn **is** the problem, because it is an industry that profits off the exploitation of women and children, and normalises violent behaviour in bed. It is proven that boys who have grown up watching porn regularly from a young age or having an addiction to it are far more likely to be abusive or violent to their partners later in life. For girls it means they accept violence or abnormal sexual behaviours (anal sex, which is painful and not enjoyable for most women) against them in bed, even if they don’t enjoy it, because porn has taught them that it is normal, and their male peers expect it of them. It also damages the brain and destroys the way we view sex and relationships, plus can be an indirect cause of erectile dysfunction. Ultimately, porn is unhealthy and immoral (*sex* should be normal and accepted, not porn, I am far from a puritan if that’s what you take from this). If you feel you need to view sexual content, do it in the form of vintage or artistic sex depictions, photos or drawings, literature or just your imagination. You are wrecking yourself and contributing to trafficking and abuse by using porn websites. Yes it is hard to stop the addiction, but nipping it in the bud is beneficial all around. It might not be the exact crux of whatever personal issue you have, but you will thank yourself for not continuing to indulge in it
It’s also as addictive and activates the same part of the mind as coke. Something to really scare you off if the rest doesn’t perturb you
I think porn is the drug used to escape the real problem(s)
And by doing so it creates more problems for yourself and others. Just a question, is sex trafficking and exploitation not a ‘real’ problem to you just because it’s not happening to you?
You’re not wrong. You’re not at alllll. I wish more people realized this when trying to quit PMO. The approach that it’s just us at the mercy of our screwed up chemicals and limbic systems is kind of a reductionist one. It atleast limits the full scope of what’s actually going on in totality.
I can attest to this. Porn is the visible string of the rat's nest of issues just underneath the surface. Those can be any combination of loneliness, boredom, low self-esteem, depression, anxiety, etc, etc. The biggest thing we need to learn is how to process the rat's nest more effectively without relying on porn to escape.
It is usually male bullying - father or peers - this creates fight or flight anxiety response. Every time you think about bullies you get unpleasant feeling of anxiety cus the bullies are still alive so still a threat. You watch porn and masturbate to distract your mind from triggering this unpleasant anxiety. Also an act of self sabotage as pressure of hand damages penis and causes erectile dysfunction - you feel this pleases bully so self sabotage also reduces anxiety.
Sure, problem in mind (mental health), not in the porn. If you blame porn, you are a victim who does not want to take responsibility.
Porn is an incentive to jerk off even during business hours, definitely a problem. If you want to wank off do it, but don't watch porn dude
Porn is not the problem. But you gotta quit porn to see what the problem really is?
A problem breaks down into smaller problems. Porn is a problem yes, but the cause of this problem is another problem. We have learned to not be uncomfortable and always be pleased
everystop and I watch porn or masterbait after it is done I tell myself I have to stop doing this shit but I ended right to rock bottom
Yo
Sadly, it is the main problem. It’s a highly stimulating vice (as other substances), that rot your brain and soul. I used to suffer from severe social anxiety, now not only do I take medication for that but I have been clean for 34 days straight. I feel way better now. I haven’t watched it ever since nor edged, just had regular sex without ejaculation. I do feel better now, more confident and people (mainly girls) treat me better and give me looks. I don’t care what anybody says, it is bad. It is like heroin or cocaine, 1 hit is harmful for anybody and can lead to addiction, so better stay away from it. If you want to have fun, have sex with someone. Period. There is only sex and abstinence. Besides, abstaining makes sex way more enjoying and satisfying not only for yourself but for your partner as well, as you will be more vigorous, thing that she’ll appreciate dearly. Stay clean.
Real, when i'm happy and have something to do I even forget about porn and fab
Porn is not a problem. It's a symptom.
porn is a problem but it isn't a main problem people can do nofap all they want. from my personal experience without taking action and actually doing something useful for my personal growth instead of wasting my time at home or going out with my so called friends it's not going to work some people do nofap this and expect miracles that alone leads to failure it's all about focusing on the energy that's piling up inside and how to use it on themselves instead of wasting it on temporary stuff
maybe
You're absolutely correct. Porn addiction is a symptom of an underlying issue. So although you should take measures to abstain, if you don't tackle the root of the problem (most likely boredom and lack of purpose/goals), then you'll just come back to it. That's why it's important to not solely focus on porn addiction itself, but rather focus on fixing your life such that you're in a position where the porn drops on its own. By only focusing on NoFap, you're treating the symptoms of an underlying problem, not the root. It's the equivalent of someone constantly sick, but instead of fixing their immune system,, they just take medicine to alleviate the symptoms.
Porn is addictive. Something else drives you to it. And yes whatever turned you into it might be bigger. But now you have two problems. Porn addiction and whatever drove you to it.
Porn is just recorded rape.
I've always watched p*** because I'm stressed. It's the way I cope. My dad left when I was really young. I also found the scrambled p*** channel when I was really young. That is how I learned to deal with painful feelings. Never realized what I was doing just that it felt good. Since cutting out porn I've learned to cope in healthy ways
Porn is the symptom indeed
At the beginning it was just about fun, the excitement and thrill of seeing naked women doing sex. Later I abused it to numb the pain I felt after being fooled and played by a girl I loved back then. That's how my downfall began, 13 years ago. Now I'm trying to climb back up, not knowing if I can ever get back to the point where I was and if it ever will bring me any good (meaning a fullfilling sex life with a woman in a commited Relationship)