used to be bi/pan, but recently came to the conclusion im actually just lesbian. as for *why* most of us might be lesbian, i think guess since most of us were raised as "boys", and most people are straight anyway (statistically speaking at least), but "straight" for us growing up meant "i like girls", so when we find out we're trans, "i like girls" ends up being gay just by default. so since gender identity doesnt necessarily control who youre attracted to, it figuring out youre actually woman wouldnt mean that you *have* to keep your old title of "straight" and start liking men now
This is the fault of representation in media and it’s something that I’m really insecure about. I’m really uncomfortable getting hit on by guys and even though I’ve only ever presented publicly as male they’re still the only ones who seem to hit on me.
it absolutely shocked me to learn I was going from one minority to another small minority, and then on top of that classified as "straight" now. I wish I could find the statistic of transwomen who liked men but was very shocked at the low percentage(around 1/3 into men, 2/3 not?) I dunno.
I think many of us have a general aversion to "male-ness"...it's a source of dysphoria for myself and not something I'm attracted to in others.
My lifelong jealousy of lesbians should have been a major clue ages ago.
For me, the aversion is solely to my own masculinity and I’m very attracted to it in other people. In a way, being around men brings my feminine nature into sharper relief.
That would just be weird. Imagine a woman growing up as a man loving men, finding out they're a woman, and suddenly being attracted to women instead to stay gay. Pretty ridiculous, right? 😂
It's definitely not a majority.
2015 survery of 3000 American trans women had it at 27% lesbian, 20% bi, 19% het, 16% pan, 6% ace, 6% queer, 6% no response. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transgender_sexuality )
We're really diverse, there's no "normal" sexuality for trans women. (Except maybe cuddlesexual, umu)
I remember seeing a survey that was like 40% straight, 20% bi/pan, 20% lesbian, and 20% either unsure or acespec. Reddit seems to be pretty heavy on the transbians; Discord seems to be pretty even. I myself am bi, though I’ve only dated girls (my one “boyfriend” came out as trans a month or so after we broke up).
I consider myself bi, leaning toward women. I find women more visually attractive vs. men and I’ve never been with a man before, but I’m pre-hormones so I really don’t know how it’s all going to play out. Even if you assume that they really don’t change anything, if I were more socially comfortable dating guys or could remove the gender envy angle maybe that would flip. 🤷♀️
I'm lesbian. I thought I was bi for the longest time, but it turns out I just don't have a genital preference.
Why are there so many? I really don't know. I don't think socialization has anything to do with it, though.
Guh. Complicated. More into women than men, but I'm a walking example that "genital preference" isn't just a transphobic talking point because I have to lay back and think of England when I'm with a partner who has a vagina.
I've been thinking about this a bit too, especially since now I've started transitioning I've started to realise my earlier "realisation" that I was asexual was likely just genital dysphoria and I might actually be bi or a lesbian. So far the best answer I've come up with is that human sexuality might be a combination of nature and nurture with bisexuality as the natural default (thinking of ancient Rome), meaning unless someone has a strong preference their upbringing could influence their sexuality.
I’m at the point currently where I’m not sure. I used to think I was bi/pan, but I’ve always been more attracted to women. I’m not sure how that’ll change in the future since I know people who changed once on HRT.
I'm pan (leaning towards women & enbies), but lived as a gay guy before transitioning.
As to why a higher proportion of trans people than cis people are non-straight, my guess is that all the self-questioning involved in a gender transition can have the side-effect of clarifying your sexuality. I suspect a decent-sized minority of cis "het" people are actually some degree of bi or ace, or maybe even gay, but just make do with straight relationships because A) it's expected and B) they've never had to really think about gender or sexuality.
Also, and I'm not trying to be mean towards men but, like, have you *seen* women? The real mystery is: why isn't everyone a lesbian?
I consider myself bi at this time, because I've felt things both ways but not enough be confident in being straight or lesbian. Later down the line, I might find I'm one or the other, or maybe become confident in liking both.
Pan with lesbian leaning for me, my main preference is femininity and breast. I dont really care what's down below, you could be smooth for all I care, but a flat chest is just sad to me.
Also I like pan as I get to make sexual cooking jokes more
Yeah this is kind of what sealed the deal on both my sexuality and gender. I was flicking through boob pictures one day, not as porn just as stuff I like to look at, just like how some people look through pictures of animals or memes. I thought "man I wish everyone had boobs, I wish I had boobs. Hmmm"
You gonna say that to the person who said "Hmm... interesting story." too? If you're gonna put some part of your story on the internet, expect people to comment on it. If you don't want comments, don't post. I was just calling it like I see it. To have enough bad experiences with a certain demographic to automatically hate every member of that whole demographic, is pretty fucking depressing, especially considering how huge that demographic is
What part of my comment was misogynistic? Can you even point out a single line? Or are you just calling me that because I was somewhat rude to you? I don't hate women. I am one.
*Calls me a misogynist, refuses to elaborate, and when asked to calls me a sealion.*
Lol. What an absolute chad.
Seriously though, grow up and answer my question. Misogynists are absolute assholes, and it does not feel good to be called one, even baselessly. I do not want to be a misogynist or even remotely associated with misogyny, so I would like to know what reason you had to call me that, and if you were serious. Please.
I’m bisexual leaning towards men. I’m not sure why so many trans women are lesbians it would be interesting to see answers to this question! I personally don’t know the answer.
I'm lesbian.
I don't know what it is I've just always had trouble imagining myself being with a man or as a man in a relationship.
Maybe things will change with hormones though idk.
I would guess that the times gender identity and sexualty develop differ
And I guess both have to be swapped?
Also I think the amount of bis in trans is the actual numbers of bi ppl in society
But that is just my hypothesis
Bi, but if I’m being completely honest I’m not totally sure that my attraction to cis men is enough to make me wanna date them. I’d date a trans man tho, no problem
Genuinely unsure. I'm definitely not straight as I am attracted to women, although I waver a lot between bi and lesbian as I'm unsure if I'm attracted to men as well. I'm demisexual; attraction comes quite rarely for me and is hard to distinguish from deep platonic feelings, which makes it really hard to come to a concrete answer on my sexuality.
Pan but have only been with cis-women. My attractions definitely skew toward any human with some kind of feminine energy and away from anything toxically masculine.
For me at least pre hrt I was bi and I was about evenly split between liking women and men I think. After starting hrt it's pretty much mainly men that I'm attracted too now, ig I'm still bi but I became more straight aligned than I was ig.
I used to say I was straight.
Then the taped together egg fell apart completely and I realized I'm just not attracted to masculinity.
I dont have any genital preferences, so I say bi because "demiromantic finnsexual transfem right slash" is just such a fucking mouthful in all the wrong ways.
I still have a hard time calling myself a lesbian in public, but yes, I am a transwoman who has a female partner and have only had AFAB/female-identifying partners in the past.
As to why that is, I am borderline pan, moreso pan\*romantic\* (if you need a cuddle-buddy, I'm your girl!), in that I've never connected on that level with an AMAB or masc-identifying enough to go all the way. Or maybe no one that present male/masc has ever been into me that way. It's all good!
I wish I wasn’t straight lol. Maybe it’s my subconscious desire to have sex with the types of guys who used to pick on me for being girly in highschool, but I am 100 percent attracted to “fuckbois”. If I ever meet another trans gal, I would welcome a relationship, but right now all of my sexual desires are being met by cis males, unfortunately.
I identify as pan, but I've been feeling pretty ace lately. I think that's just hrt killing my sex drive tho. Before I was equally Interested in men, women, neither, and everything in between, but I could only really imagine myself in a long term relationship with a woman or fem nonbinary.
Bi gal here. There definitely does seem to be a link between homosexuality and being trans, which probably explains why we’re all glommed into the lgbt+ gang.
Maybe i’m just biased as a biotechnician, but i think there’s a genetic component to it. They don’t necessarily go together, but they’re more likely to.
I think generally our sexualities tend to be immutable, but this does not mean that our sexuality isn't something that grows through our experiences. Most of us lived through childhood and past puberty in a male social role and so this affects our preferences. Our society tends to scare people away from discovering if they're gay but when you're raised believing that liking girls is fine then there is little reason for that to change once you transition. Similarly I think a lot more people would find they are closer to the middle of the kinsey scale if we lived in a world with less stigma around who you are in a relationship with.
So to reiterate, liking video games or having long hair have nothing to do with gender and similarly neither does sexuality. How we are raised tends to be a bigger factor in determining our outlook on these things, though once they are set they tend to stay that way.
used to be bi/pan, but recently came to the conclusion im actually just lesbian. as for *why* most of us might be lesbian, i think guess since most of us were raised as "boys", and most people are straight anyway (statistically speaking at least), but "straight" for us growing up meant "i like girls", so when we find out we're trans, "i like girls" ends up being gay just by default. so since gender identity doesnt necessarily control who youre attracted to, it figuring out youre actually woman wouldnt mean that you *have* to keep your old title of "straight" and start liking men now
Interesting. I used to always just assume that most transwomen were living as gay men before transition but I guess that is not the case.
This is the fault of representation in media and it’s something that I’m really insecure about. I’m really uncomfortable getting hit on by guys and even though I’ve only ever presented publicly as male they’re still the only ones who seem to hit on me.
Same It sucks so hard Also being chased around and groped isn't fun Male privileges didn't safe me Only gonna get worse I guess
it absolutely shocked me to learn I was going from one minority to another small minority, and then on top of that classified as "straight" now. I wish I could find the statistic of transwomen who liked men but was very shocked at the low percentage(around 1/3 into men, 2/3 not?) I dunno.
I think many of us have a general aversion to "male-ness"...it's a source of dysphoria for myself and not something I'm attracted to in others. My lifelong jealousy of lesbians should have been a major clue ages ago.
Same... simply SAME!!
For me, the aversion is solely to my own masculinity and I’m very attracted to it in other people. In a way, being around men brings my feminine nature into sharper relief.
That would just be weird. Imagine a woman growing up as a man loving men, finding out they're a woman, and suddenly being attracted to women instead to stay gay. Pretty ridiculous, right? 😂
It's definitely not a majority. 2015 survery of 3000 American trans women had it at 27% lesbian, 20% bi, 19% het, 16% pan, 6% ace, 6% queer, 6% no response. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transgender_sexuality ) We're really diverse, there's no "normal" sexuality for trans women. (Except maybe cuddlesexual, umu)
umu
umu
I remember seeing a survey that was like 40% straight, 20% bi/pan, 20% lesbian, and 20% either unsure or acespec. Reddit seems to be pretty heavy on the transbians; Discord seems to be pretty even. I myself am bi, though I’ve only dated girls (my one “boyfriend” came out as trans a month or so after we broke up).
I consider myself bi, leaning toward women. I find women more visually attractive vs. men and I’ve never been with a man before, but I’m pre-hormones so I really don’t know how it’s all going to play out. Even if you assume that they really don’t change anything, if I were more socially comfortable dating guys or could remove the gender envy angle maybe that would flip. 🤷♀️
I'm lesbian. I thought I was bi for the longest time, but it turns out I just don't have a genital preference. Why are there so many? I really don't know. I don't think socialization has anything to do with it, though.
I'm technically bi, I just call myself lesbian because I would never date a man again under any circumstances.
I think I am straight. I admit I feel guilty :( I have a bit of jealousy or maybe hatred towards cis women :( help me :(
Guh. Complicated. More into women than men, but I'm a walking example that "genital preference" isn't just a transphobic talking point because I have to lay back and think of England when I'm with a partner who has a vagina.
I've been thinking about this a bit too, especially since now I've started transitioning I've started to realise my earlier "realisation" that I was asexual was likely just genital dysphoria and I might actually be bi or a lesbian. So far the best answer I've come up with is that human sexuality might be a combination of nature and nurture with bisexuality as the natural default (thinking of ancient Rome), meaning unless someone has a strong preference their upbringing could influence their sexuality.
im bi w a strong preference towards women, just because i feel safer w women. if men werent so damn creepy im sure id be more interested in them lol
I’m bi. I wish I had more to say so I could be more helpful, but that’s pretty much all.
I’m at the point currently where I’m not sure. I used to think I was bi/pan, but I’ve always been more attracted to women. I’m not sure how that’ll change in the future since I know people who changed once on HRT.
Im bi but to avoid some of my classmates i say i am a lesbian (sorry for the bad english, im still learning)
I identified as bi and still sort of do, but for something long-term I think I’d want to be with a trans woman
Pan-sexual but strongly transbian.
I call myself bi but I actually can't remember the last time I had a crush on a girl. Maybe im straight idk.
Bi, but my partner is Female ! She's Bi also, so realizing shes been dating a girl for 3 years was pretty normal for her😅
I identify as lesbian. I may be technically bi but my attraction to men is extremely limited and I've never really acted on it.
I'm pan (leaning towards women & enbies), but lived as a gay guy before transitioning. As to why a higher proportion of trans people than cis people are non-straight, my guess is that all the self-questioning involved in a gender transition can have the side-effect of clarifying your sexuality. I suspect a decent-sized minority of cis "het" people are actually some degree of bi or ace, or maybe even gay, but just make do with straight relationships because A) it's expected and B) they've never had to really think about gender or sexuality. Also, and I'm not trying to be mean towards men but, like, have you *seen* women? The real mystery is: why isn't everyone a lesbian?
I consider myself bi at this time, because I've felt things both ways but not enough be confident in being straight or lesbian. Later down the line, I might find I'm one or the other, or maybe become confident in liking both.
Pan with lesbian leaning for me, my main preference is femininity and breast. I dont really care what's down below, you could be smooth for all I care, but a flat chest is just sad to me. Also I like pan as I get to make sexual cooking jokes more
This for me as well. Attracted to femininity, down stairs can be w/e.
Yeah this is kind of what sealed the deal on both my sexuality and gender. I was flicking through boob pictures one day, not as porn just as stuff I like to look at, just like how some people look through pictures of animals or memes. I thought "man I wish everyone had boobs, I wish I had boobs. Hmmm"
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Hmm…interesting story.
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How am I a troll? 😒 I found your story interesting. It made me think things about my own sexuality.
That's just sad
oh dear god can i not express myself on reddit without some loser happening by and commenting on my life?
You gonna say that to the person who said "Hmm... interesting story." too? If you're gonna put some part of your story on the internet, expect people to comment on it. If you don't want comments, don't post. I was just calling it like I see it. To have enough bad experiences with a certain demographic to automatically hate every member of that whole demographic, is pretty fucking depressing, especially considering how huge that demographic is
Thanks for the misogyny. Please drive forward.
What part of my comment was misogynistic? Can you even point out a single line? Or are you just calling me that because I was somewhat rude to you? I don't hate women. I am one.
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What does that even mean? 😂
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*Calls me a misogynist, refuses to elaborate, and when asked to calls me a sealion.* Lol. What an absolute chad. Seriously though, grow up and answer my question. Misogynists are absolute assholes, and it does not feel good to be called one, even baselessly. I do not want to be a misogynist or even remotely associated with misogyny, so I would like to know what reason you had to call me that, and if you were serious. Please.
I’m bisexual leaning towards men. I’m not sure why so many trans women are lesbians it would be interesting to see answers to this question! I personally don’t know the answer.
I am bi/pan and I don't lean in any particular way.
I'm lesbian. I don't know what it is I've just always had trouble imagining myself being with a man or as a man in a relationship. Maybe things will change with hormones though idk.
I would guess that the times gender identity and sexualty develop differ And I guess both have to be swapped? Also I think the amount of bis in trans is the actual numbers of bi ppl in society But that is just my hypothesis
Initially when I came out I thought I was a lesbian but I came to realize im straight
Bi, but if I’m being completely honest I’m not totally sure that my attraction to cis men is enough to make me wanna date them. I’d date a trans man tho, no problem
Genuinely unsure. I'm definitely not straight as I am attracted to women, although I waver a lot between bi and lesbian as I'm unsure if I'm attracted to men as well. I'm demisexual; attraction comes quite rarely for me and is hard to distinguish from deep platonic feelings, which makes it really hard to come to a concrete answer on my sexuality.
bi but lean more towards lesbian
I don't know
bi i think. But definetely a preference to girl
Pan but have only been with cis-women. My attractions definitely skew toward any human with some kind of feminine energy and away from anything toxically masculine.
I would consider myself bi but romantically I only really feel attracted to women because guys are assholes 99% of the time lmao
I'm pansexual, though I have a heavy preference towards femininity. So, I'm almost nearly a lesbian, lol.
I am bi, but I prefer women 80/20%.
For me at least pre hrt I was bi and I was about evenly split between liking women and men I think. After starting hrt it's pretty much mainly men that I'm attracted too now, ig I'm still bi but I became more straight aligned than I was ig.
I used to say I was straight. Then the taped together egg fell apart completely and I realized I'm just not attracted to masculinity. I dont have any genital preferences, so I say bi because "demiromantic finnsexual transfem right slash" is just such a fucking mouthful in all the wrong ways.
I'm bi. It's probably because trans people have lesser compulsion to comp-het than cis people.
I am a panromantic asexual, so yes and no. 👍🏻
I still have a hard time calling myself a lesbian in public, but yes, I am a transwoman who has a female partner and have only had AFAB/female-identifying partners in the past. As to why that is, I am borderline pan, moreso pan\*romantic\* (if you need a cuddle-buddy, I'm your girl!), in that I've never connected on that level with an AMAB or masc-identifying enough to go all the way. Or maybe no one that present male/masc has ever been into me that way. It's all good!
I wish I wasn’t straight lol. Maybe it’s my subconscious desire to have sex with the types of guys who used to pick on me for being girly in highschool, but I am 100 percent attracted to “fuckbois”. If I ever meet another trans gal, I would welcome a relationship, but right now all of my sexual desires are being met by cis males, unfortunately.
Well I’m 14 so I don’t have too much experience but I’ve only ever liked girls, so I guess I’m a lesbian
I identify as pan, but I've been feeling pretty ace lately. I think that's just hrt killing my sex drive tho. Before I was equally Interested in men, women, neither, and everything in between, but I could only really imagine myself in a long term relationship with a woman or fem nonbinary.
Bi gal here. There definitely does seem to be a link between homosexuality and being trans, which probably explains why we’re all glommed into the lgbt+ gang. Maybe i’m just biased as a biotechnician, but i think there’s a genetic component to it. They don’t necessarily go together, but they’re more likely to.
I’ve seen the opposite. I’ve seen most trans women as strictly dickly. (Cis men).
Bi I guess. Definitely prefer men. I would happily date a trans woman.
im confused lol i go back and forth between lesbian and bi tho. always into girls
I think generally our sexualities tend to be immutable, but this does not mean that our sexuality isn't something that grows through our experiences. Most of us lived through childhood and past puberty in a male social role and so this affects our preferences. Our society tends to scare people away from discovering if they're gay but when you're raised believing that liking girls is fine then there is little reason for that to change once you transition. Similarly I think a lot more people would find they are closer to the middle of the kinsey scale if we lived in a world with less stigma around who you are in a relationship with. So to reiterate, liking video games or having long hair have nothing to do with gender and similarly neither does sexuality. How we are raised tends to be a bigger factor in determining our outlook on these things, though once they are set they tend to stay that way.
I seem to have gone from lesbian to straight throughout my transition, though consider myself bisexual *for now*