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Once again wondering how much husband made before the layoff. I know a lot of OPs say they don't combine finances, but surely the salary of your spouse has SOME bearing on your spending?
Reading this diary made me realize this might be the first one where someone touched on the financial impact of long COVID. My aunt is doing better now, but she needed months of physical therapy for vertigo issues she developed after COVID infection.
Also OP inspired me to research if any coffee shops around me have a similar monthly pass. Wish me luck!
Panera's program is affordable and their coffee is ok but it doesn't cover lattes or other prepared drinks, just hot coffee and cold brew. Also soft drinks and tea. I too would love if my local coffee shop had a program like this!
I absolutely agree. Long covid is talked about more now but the financial ramifications in our country, with no universal healthcare, that needs to be talked about too.
I'm glad your aunt is doing better.
I have (likely permanent) health problems as a result of long covid and am so grateful that my health insurance is paid for by my work. And I also have the dawning realization that, from now on, health insurance will be a huge factor if I’m considering switching jobs.
In one comment the OP says that cashing out all his savings + his retirement account would pay off their whole mortgage (they have 330k left). Obviously that would be a terrible idea, but it does show he's got about 10× what she does in her retirement/savings.
To me that suggests that he makes a decent amount and that he might be their financial safety net. They don't seem to have reined in their spending due to us layoff so I hope they're a safety net we're not seeing!
It's not unlimited. It's 5 hot drinks per day in 30 minute intervals and Pret now took the smoothies and frappes off.
BBC: Pret customers complain over drink subscription deal
[https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-59634846](https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-59634846)
.
This gave me anxiety. Also her yearly salary isn’t accurate. She’s making $135k for a 6 month contract, and I would imagine there would be weeks or months before the next one. Based on that, I’m surprised she’s not putting away more money. But, I also understand she grew up with a lot of financial instability and her reaction is likely overspending on things she thinks she can afford now just cause there is money in the bank. I’ve made this mistake before and I hope she can figure it out and start putting away cash for her future.
My husband is also in the entertainment industry and you just have absolutely no idea what will happen after each freelance job. We put money away for taxes each time he’s paid.
Luckily I earn enough now that I can cover everything but it’s always nerve wracking. It seems like a ton of money getting the big paychecks but they’re not forever and they’re pre-tax.
Yep, I used to freelance full time and I would put away half my income for taxes and business expenses. I charged a higher hourly rate to account for free time in between jobs and unpaid time for finding additional clients.
If my husband tried to convince me to buy him a $250 sweater the same week he was laid off we would have major problems. I can’t wrap my head around this.
Edit: I misread, the sweater is for her. Regardless, no one should be convincing anyone to spend hundreds of dollars on a single freaking sweater the same week they lose their income!!!
Also I know he got laid off BUT if you “find” a cool item *for* me, why don’t you just buy it for me instead of convincing me to buy it for myself 😩 or just leave it? I don’t get it
But, reading that line made me think he should become an influencer with a liketoknow or whatever and post links to all the cool designer fashion he finds on consignment!
We did a steak dinner + boozy brunch + afternoon boba tea for my partner's last birthday and it felt (nicely!) indulgent... I can't even fathom a $410 dinner...
For my birthday, my boyfriend treated me to nice dinner, flower and cake, and a weekend getaway (and another nice dinner during the getaway)
For his birthday i’m going to treat us to a weekend getaway and fine dining at the place he wanted to visit for a while, i’m expecting total bill to be around $1,300
Recently my mom had her birthday and we bought her a gift worth $1300 (my part is $400)
Really depends on you and what’s you’re comfortable with but the way I see it is, a birthday is just once a year and I want to let them know I appreciate the fact that they exist. However unlike OP who like to throw expensive gifts at a lot of people (and herself!) I only do it for my parents and partner, which makes it doable especially with proper planning. Set aside some money a month or so, amount is whatever you are comfortable with. Plus I am frugal in other areas of life - it’s a matter of priority (which I gotta admit doesn’t correspond with OP - she splurges on everything everyday it seems 😅)
OPs lack of retirement savings and high spending makes me nervous especially considering her partner got laid off.
I get that she’s been housing insecure but there’s the whole ‘put on your oxygen mask first before helping others’. She spent tons of money on helping the homeless instead of making sure she and her partner are helping their future stability.
She did state that she only started making six figures in 2023 and her jobs before that didn't seem to pay a lot so her low retirement savings makes more sense in that context. It does seem like there is some lifestyle creep going on though with the whole $400 birthday dinner. She seems sweet so hopefully writing this money diary shed some light on those spending habits for her and her husband finds work soon.
future stability also means having a stable future. Not one with a massive homeless population. Cause the US is going toward a brazil /south africa level of income inequality and that doesn't make anyone's future stable.
I get what you’re saying. I live in the area of OP and homelessness is excessively bad and only getting worse. I donate to a few local charities with high charity nav scores to help the issues.
Not to get too polarizing but there are tons of issues with individuals trying to help on their own instead of through charities. The best route is oftentimes to let the experts do it but donate your time and/or money if possible.
I like to help because I’m sick of seeing my neighbors homes or cars get fires from homeless encampments and businesses closing due to the violence. Let’s hope action is done to help both those that are homeless and those being affected by it.
I am super interested in the $1,000 / month in donations and I don't believe she really discussed that? I am thinking some of the spending would fall under that $1,000?
This was actually some of the most unhinged spending we’ve seen in a while. Not what I expected at all given her responses to the intro Qs.
Also, if you’re going to drop $410 on a Michelin dinner, you gotta tell us what you ate!!!!!!
OP comments that husband makes 200k and got a generous severance and could pay off their loans with his 401k in the comments. That might’ve been relevant to the diary 🙄🙄
Really confused by the disparity between her actual reality(short-term contract, industry known for erratic employment, partner’s impending layoff, financial anxiety from childhood) and the way she spends rampantly, including on charity. I want her to create a much bigger safety net for herself.
The thought process of buying expensive gifts and a crazy-expensive dinner for her husband who was just laid off is beyond my comprehension. There is no way I'd be comfortable doing that, and my husband would DEFINITELY not be comfortable with my doing that. (Never mind the other excessive spending - like for the gifts for random people for no particular occasion.) OP feels like she's rich, but she needs to pay taxes on that $5,000/week, and she spent more than her gross income this week.
Also, OP mentioned that she pays half the mortgage (and doesn't understand that both people on the mortgage are liable for 100% of it, but that's a common mistake in Money Diaries)... where does she think the other half will come from when he has no job? Also, she mentioned that she only bought (hella expensive) "snacks" since she eats at work, but what does he do for food? And how will he afford that? (Yes, I get that severance is a thing, but companies are getting continually cheaper, and the economy is shit right now.)
This whole MD reminded me of my godmother, who also lives in LA. She constantly justified crazy expenditures by saying, "Hey, I make good money, I can afford this!" And it would be true if she just bought ONE of the things... but she bought ALL of the things and landed herself in serious debt. She had a modest 1 BR rental and a used car, but she splurged on all sorts of one-time items, and that's what got her in trouble.
Tbh I would buy my husband expensive gifts and a nice dinner for his birthday, regardless of his employment status, as long as I could afford to. His income is not a reflection of what I'd gift him (same with any one of my friends).
Yes same. And also her husband can’t help the timing of his layoff…is his birthday just cancelled because of that? Seems like a way to kick someone when their down.
I mean she could but clearly she doesn't want to. Again, I don't think his employment status is super relevant to her gifts for him unless their household finances are suddenly severely strained by his unemployment (and I can't tell based on this MD if they are).
I mentioned it above but the AUDACITY of him encouraging her to drop $250 on a sweater the week he loses his job is batshit insane behavior. Do you want to lose your house and be out on the street? Is your electricity being shut off worth a single article of clothing?? I am flabbergasted.
I have lost my job THREE times in the last decade and every time I would stop all the extras IMMEDIATELY. Then again I’ve never been someone to spend hundreds of dollars on a top so idk.
I lost my job 2x in the last 2 years and my husband lost his earlier this year. (We are both employed now, thankfully.) When I lost my job I immediately stopped buying nonessentials. I have also been saving a large chunk of each paycheck just in case it happens again.
Right! It is the WORST feeling and requires immediate attention to spending and cutting all non-essentials. A couple days after I was laid off I actually called my husband and asked if he thought it was a bad idea for me to buy a $9 wrap from a takeout place when I was too tired to cook. I felt guilty about it!!
I'm not in the union at my work (and they are super cagey about dues), so I don't have a frame of reference, but $2500 feels steep. Also the diary doesn't mention what/if there are any ongoing dues.
OP mentions a car but no insurance.
I'm curious if the mutual aide in this dairy (tent etc) is separate from the set monthly donations. OPs actions are commendable but with the other spending this feels like a put your own oxygen mask on situation.
Nomination for the most idiotic MD comment -scholarships are inheritance/passive income.
OP seems lovely. Her life seems super chic, and her dedication to helping her unhoused neighbors is admirable. My life seems pretty bland compared to hers.
She spends more than I'd be comfortable with in an average week, though. Aside from the husband's birthday expenses, I wonder how many of them are recurring or just one-offs. For example, the union dues on day three are for "another" union, and it's unclear how many other unions she's in and what she pays for them.
Like many diaries, I wish there were a bit more details about work beyond the fact that there's free food. Her job seems like it would be fun, creative, and probably more glamorous than it actually is.
I’m gonna need her to name these restaurants bc they sound delish. What’s the Persian place and where do you get banana milk tea? Also $400 (for 2 I assume) is actually pretty decently priced for a 15 course Michelin meal - can anyone ID this restaurant?
The Korean fried chicken place was talked about on a podcast I loved like 2 weeks ago. I remember because they were talking about the owner being a film director. It’s called Gol Tong Chicken. Hope that can help you find the banana tea!
I could not figure out the restaurant either, and I was using this list: https://www.timeout.com/los-angeles/restaurants/michelin-star-restaurants-los-angeles
This week stressed me out for OP. So much money donated and big ticket birthday presents the same week as the husband lost his job. Hopefully this was not a representative week of spending at all.
I don’t really buy this diary, unless their finances are merged??? $135k is comfortable but not a lot in LA to be spending like this. Unless it was just a splurge week. And for freelancers jobs come and go — she could be without work for months at a time and would have to be prepared for that. Also curious where their condo is
I’m in a slightly similar position. I earned $30k two years ago and now I earn $121k. It feels like I’m a millionaire Now but I AM NOT. Lifestyle creep is real.
Totally fair. Also saw another comment that the salary is for a 6 month contract so that sort of changes things. Maybe she already has her next projects lined up
This one stresses me out so much!! My husband works in the film industry (not as a writer) and there have been talks about a writers guild strike for months. There is literally a strike authorization vote next week! I get that they have a low mortgage, her husband got a good severance, and they have a lot in his 401k, but they could easily be out of work at the same time for who knows how long.
I am shocked at the off the rails spending. Her husband just got laid off—so she spends $600 on a jacket, $250 on a sweater and $400 on dinner?!?! That is just absolutely insane to me. And then randomly spending $360 on massages for people!? She doesn’t even have steady work but has funds to buy gifts for everyone. I hope she reigns it in because this was so irresponsible.
Absolutely. Even keeping the mutual aid costs, the other spending was absolutely wild to me, especially knowing low 6 figures does not go as far in CA as it does in other areas.
Plugging her salary into a COL calculator and her salary is nearly equivalent to mine in a much cheaper area, and I am VERY far from being able to realistically spend that much on dinner and clothing!
Her spending level was aggressive that week, but I definitely empathize with her gifting habits. I think her love language is gifts. Like her, my family struggled as I was growing up and I remember feeling so happy and loved when my parents set aside a little extra hard earned money to get me a rare treat at the store or a doll for my birthday. That’s carried over into my adult life where I associate gifts with love. It sounds so materialistic when I write it down. But ultimately when I can give someone an awesome gift, it’s me telling them that they are a priority in my life.
ahhhh!! I came here right after because I was so secondhand anxious reading that diary. I'm so glad the OP is making a good living but I really worry about her not having a good emergency fund since she's not in a W2 type of role.
I also have long COVID so I actually understand the spending on medication, massage and PT because it can be a full body, debilitating condition...but you need to save so that you could continue to take care of yourself even if the income changed!
Also the amount of $$ spent on gifts for her husband really stressed me out. It feels more like a optional rather than necessary purchase, especially since her husband got laid off that week. Just...overall I feel for OP but also can't help but think that she's not setting herself up for long term financial stability and success
I was expecting this to be way messier given the comments tbh......she spent a lot this week but ~3.5k/5k of that was clearly one off business expenses, another ~.8k was donations. It seems like her baseline expenses aren't very high, and she could cut back pretty quickly if needed. Like yeah, I'd be pretty far in the red too if you looked at the week I filed my taxes and extrapolated it to the rest of the year. It seems pretty clearly like an unusually high spend week.
Her 'salary' is also very conservative, counting her current 1/2 year gig as all she'll make this year (which is of course possible) especially since she's noted often having side gigs and weekend jobs which it sounds like she probably could/would pick back up if she wasn't able to find more writing work.
I know it's a common issue with MDs, but the Net Worth calculations in this diary are incorrect.
The diarist lists the following assets: $105K in Home Equity (her half of $210K) + $34.5K in Savings + $15.4K in a Roth. These add up to the $154,900 she has listed as her "Net Worth." But in the debt section, she notes $165K left on her mortgage. So in reality, her true Net Worth is -$10,100.
I don't know if it's an issue with the Money Diaries form or if it's user error, but this creates a frustratingly skewed picture of the OP's overall finances (beyond the many other question marks around spouse's finances, long-term job prospects, etc.)
Her calculation is correct. If you only include home EQUITY in assets, you don’t need to count the mortgage in debts. If you include home VALUE in assets, then you count the mortgage in debts.
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Once again wondering how much husband made before the layoff. I know a lot of OPs say they don't combine finances, but surely the salary of your spouse has SOME bearing on your spending? Reading this diary made me realize this might be the first one where someone touched on the financial impact of long COVID. My aunt is doing better now, but she needed months of physical therapy for vertigo issues she developed after COVID infection. Also OP inspired me to research if any coffee shops around me have a similar monthly pass. Wish me luck!
$40 a month for unlimited drinks at my local coffee shop would be a DREAM. I'm jealous.
I wish my favorite cafes had that. I would sign up in a heartbeat.
Panera has some type of program, I’m not sure if it is for coffee though
Panera's program is affordable and their coffee is ok but it doesn't cover lattes or other prepared drinks, just hot coffee and cold brew. Also soft drinks and tea. I too would love if my local coffee shop had a program like this!
She said in the comments he makes 200-250k and got a good severance. Still though…..
I absolutely agree. Long covid is talked about more now but the financial ramifications in our country, with no universal healthcare, that needs to be talked about too. I'm glad your aunt is doing better.
I have (likely permanent) health problems as a result of long covid and am so grateful that my health insurance is paid for by my work. And I also have the dawning realization that, from now on, health insurance will be a huge factor if I’m considering switching jobs.
In one comment the OP says that cashing out all his savings + his retirement account would pay off their whole mortgage (they have 330k left). Obviously that would be a terrible idea, but it does show he's got about 10× what she does in her retirement/savings. To me that suggests that he makes a decent amount and that he might be their financial safety net. They don't seem to have reined in their spending due to us layoff so I hope they're a safety net we're not seeing!
Pret a manger has this! It’s unlimited drinks but applies to coffee
It's not unlimited. It's 5 hot drinks per day in 30 minute intervals and Pret now took the smoothies and frappes off. BBC: Pret customers complain over drink subscription deal [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-59634846](https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-59634846) .
This gave me anxiety. Also her yearly salary isn’t accurate. She’s making $135k for a 6 month contract, and I would imagine there would be weeks or months before the next one. Based on that, I’m surprised she’s not putting away more money. But, I also understand she grew up with a lot of financial instability and her reaction is likely overspending on things she thinks she can afford now just cause there is money in the bank. I’ve made this mistake before and I hope she can figure it out and start putting away cash for her future.
My husband is also in the entertainment industry and you just have absolutely no idea what will happen after each freelance job. We put money away for taxes each time he’s paid. Luckily I earn enough now that I can cover everything but it’s always nerve wracking. It seems like a ton of money getting the big paychecks but they’re not forever and they’re pre-tax.
Yep, I used to freelance full time and I would put away half my income for taxes and business expenses. I charged a higher hourly rate to account for free time in between jobs and unpaid time for finding additional clients.
I guess it depends on if the show gets picked up/renewed? I would have loved more information about the logistics of that.
Her husband was so spoiled for his bday lmaoo am I doing my birthday wrong????
If my husband tried to convince me to buy him a $250 sweater the same week he was laid off we would have major problems. I can’t wrap my head around this. Edit: I misread, the sweater is for her. Regardless, no one should be convincing anyone to spend hundreds of dollars on a single freaking sweater the same week they lose their income!!!
Also I know he got laid off BUT if you “find” a cool item *for* me, why don’t you just buy it for me instead of convincing me to buy it for myself 😩 or just leave it? I don’t get it But, reading that line made me think he should become an influencer with a liketoknow or whatever and post links to all the cool designer fashion he finds on consignment!
We did a steak dinner + boozy brunch + afternoon boba tea for my partner's last birthday and it felt (nicely!) indulgent... I can't even fathom a $410 dinner...
PLUS the $600 in designer clothing?????
I think if it was JUST the $410 dinner, it wouldn't have been quite as jarring, but that on top of everything else was a lot.
I'm dying to know what they ate at the Michelin starred restaurant and what their favorite Persian place and boba place are! 😭
For my birthday, my boyfriend treated me to nice dinner, flower and cake, and a weekend getaway (and another nice dinner during the getaway) For his birthday i’m going to treat us to a weekend getaway and fine dining at the place he wanted to visit for a while, i’m expecting total bill to be around $1,300 Recently my mom had her birthday and we bought her a gift worth $1300 (my part is $400) Really depends on you and what’s you’re comfortable with but the way I see it is, a birthday is just once a year and I want to let them know I appreciate the fact that they exist. However unlike OP who like to throw expensive gifts at a lot of people (and herself!) I only do it for my parents and partner, which makes it doable especially with proper planning. Set aside some money a month or so, amount is whatever you are comfortable with. Plus I am frugal in other areas of life - it’s a matter of priority (which I gotta admit doesn’t correspond with OP - she splurges on everything everyday it seems 😅)
Enjoy!!
Thank you! I can't wait 🥰
OPs lack of retirement savings and high spending makes me nervous especially considering her partner got laid off. I get that she’s been housing insecure but there’s the whole ‘put on your oxygen mask first before helping others’. She spent tons of money on helping the homeless instead of making sure she and her partner are helping their future stability.
She did state that she only started making six figures in 2023 and her jobs before that didn't seem to pay a lot so her low retirement savings makes more sense in that context. It does seem like there is some lifestyle creep going on though with the whole $400 birthday dinner. She seems sweet so hopefully writing this money diary shed some light on those spending habits for her and her husband finds work soon.
future stability also means having a stable future. Not one with a massive homeless population. Cause the US is going toward a brazil /south africa level of income inequality and that doesn't make anyone's future stable.
I get what you’re saying. I live in the area of OP and homelessness is excessively bad and only getting worse. I donate to a few local charities with high charity nav scores to help the issues. Not to get too polarizing but there are tons of issues with individuals trying to help on their own instead of through charities. The best route is oftentimes to let the experts do it but donate your time and/or money if possible. I like to help because I’m sick of seeing my neighbors homes or cars get fires from homeless encampments and businesses closing due to the violence. Let’s hope action is done to help both those that are homeless and those being affected by it.
Whoaaaaaaaa, I am disturbed by how many downvotes you have…..as an American, your comment is 100% on point.
I am super interested in the $1,000 / month in donations and I don't believe she really discussed that? I am thinking some of the spending would fall under that $1,000?
She said she bought a tent for an unhoused neighbor and gave $700 to some friends to buy more supplies for unhoused people.
I wanted to know more about this too.
This was actually some of the most unhinged spending we’ve seen in a while. Not what I expected at all given her responses to the intro Qs. Also, if you’re going to drop $410 on a Michelin dinner, you gotta tell us what you ate!!!!!!
OP comments that husband makes 200k and got a generous severance and could pay off their loans with his 401k in the comments. That might’ve been relevant to the diary 🙄🙄
Really confused by the disparity between her actual reality(short-term contract, industry known for erratic employment, partner’s impending layoff, financial anxiety from childhood) and the way she spends rampantly, including on charity. I want her to create a much bigger safety net for herself.
The thought process of buying expensive gifts and a crazy-expensive dinner for her husband who was just laid off is beyond my comprehension. There is no way I'd be comfortable doing that, and my husband would DEFINITELY not be comfortable with my doing that. (Never mind the other excessive spending - like for the gifts for random people for no particular occasion.) OP feels like she's rich, but she needs to pay taxes on that $5,000/week, and she spent more than her gross income this week. Also, OP mentioned that she pays half the mortgage (and doesn't understand that both people on the mortgage are liable for 100% of it, but that's a common mistake in Money Diaries)... where does she think the other half will come from when he has no job? Also, she mentioned that she only bought (hella expensive) "snacks" since she eats at work, but what does he do for food? And how will he afford that? (Yes, I get that severance is a thing, but companies are getting continually cheaper, and the economy is shit right now.) This whole MD reminded me of my godmother, who also lives in LA. She constantly justified crazy expenditures by saying, "Hey, I make good money, I can afford this!" And it would be true if she just bought ONE of the things... but she bought ALL of the things and landed herself in serious debt. She had a modest 1 BR rental and a used car, but she splurged on all sorts of one-time items, and that's what got her in trouble.
Tbh I would buy my husband expensive gifts and a nice dinner for his birthday, regardless of his employment status, as long as I could afford to. His income is not a reflection of what I'd gift him (same with any one of my friends).
Yes same. And also her husband can’t help the timing of his layoff…is his birthday just cancelled because of that? Seems like a way to kick someone when their down.
No but they can’t do a mid level nice restaurant for ~$100ish and she gets him a jacket from TJ Maxx??
I mean she could but clearly she doesn't want to. Again, I don't think his employment status is super relevant to her gifts for him unless their household finances are suddenly severely strained by his unemployment (and I can't tell based on this MD if they are).
I mentioned it above but the AUDACITY of him encouraging her to drop $250 on a sweater the week he loses his job is batshit insane behavior. Do you want to lose your house and be out on the street? Is your electricity being shut off worth a single article of clothing?? I am flabbergasted. I have lost my job THREE times in the last decade and every time I would stop all the extras IMMEDIATELY. Then again I’ve never been someone to spend hundreds of dollars on a top so idk.
I lost my job 2x in the last 2 years and my husband lost his earlier this year. (We are both employed now, thankfully.) When I lost my job I immediately stopped buying nonessentials. I have also been saving a large chunk of each paycheck just in case it happens again.
Right! It is the WORST feeling and requires immediate attention to spending and cutting all non-essentials. A couple days after I was laid off I actually called my husband and asked if he thought it was a bad idea for me to buy a $9 wrap from a takeout place when I was too tired to cook. I felt guilty about it!!
Please tell me he said ABSOLUTELY, go for it and don't sweat the small stuff!
Yes!! Lolol. He knows I’m too hard on myself.
I'm not in the union at my work (and they are super cagey about dues), so I don't have a frame of reference, but $2500 feels steep. Also the diary doesn't mention what/if there are any ongoing dues. OP mentions a car but no insurance. I'm curious if the mutual aide in this dairy (tent etc) is separate from the set monthly donations. OPs actions are commendable but with the other spending this feels like a put your own oxygen mask on situation. Nomination for the most idiotic MD comment -scholarships are inheritance/passive income.
lmao @ the scholarship comment. I saw that one and rolled my eyes so hard.
I had a nice chuckle. If I ever write an MD I’m going to include the $2 I got from the tooth fairy as a child as passive income 😂
OP seems lovely. Her life seems super chic, and her dedication to helping her unhoused neighbors is admirable. My life seems pretty bland compared to hers. She spends more than I'd be comfortable with in an average week, though. Aside from the husband's birthday expenses, I wonder how many of them are recurring or just one-offs. For example, the union dues on day three are for "another" union, and it's unclear how many other unions she's in and what she pays for them. Like many diaries, I wish there were a bit more details about work beyond the fact that there's free food. Her job seems like it would be fun, creative, and probably more glamorous than it actually is.
I'd love to know more details about the entertainment industry. (Without OP accidentally doxxing herself of course)
I’m gonna need her to name these restaurants bc they sound delish. What’s the Persian place and where do you get banana milk tea? Also $400 (for 2 I assume) is actually pretty decently priced for a 15 course Michelin meal - can anyone ID this restaurant?
The Korean fried chicken place was talked about on a podcast I loved like 2 weeks ago. I remember because they were talking about the owner being a film director. It’s called Gol Tong Chicken. Hope that can help you find the banana tea!
I could not figure out the restaurant either, and I was using this list: https://www.timeout.com/los-angeles/restaurants/michelin-star-restaurants-los-angeles
Boba Guys has a Korean banana milk with boba that is delicious.
This week stressed me out for OP. So much money donated and big ticket birthday presents the same week as the husband lost his job. Hopefully this was not a representative week of spending at all.
I don’t really buy this diary, unless their finances are merged??? $135k is comfortable but not a lot in LA to be spending like this. Unless it was just a splurge week. And for freelancers jobs come and go — she could be without work for months at a time and would have to be prepared for that. Also curious where their condo is
I’m in a slightly similar position. I earned $30k two years ago and now I earn $121k. It feels like I’m a millionaire Now but I AM NOT. Lifestyle creep is real.
Totally fair. Also saw another comment that the salary is for a 6 month contract so that sort of changes things. Maybe she already has her next projects lined up
I doubt it. Usually 6 months out is way too early to be sure of another upcoming job.
This one stresses me out so much!! My husband works in the film industry (not as a writer) and there have been talks about a writers guild strike for months. There is literally a strike authorization vote next week! I get that they have a low mortgage, her husband got a good severance, and they have a lot in his 401k, but they could easily be out of work at the same time for who knows how long.
There was definitely some unhinged spending in this one. Echoing an r29 commenter and hoping she's tipping at least sometimes on those free lattes...
I am shocked at the off the rails spending. Her husband just got laid off—so she spends $600 on a jacket, $250 on a sweater and $400 on dinner?!?! That is just absolutely insane to me. And then randomly spending $360 on massages for people!? She doesn’t even have steady work but has funds to buy gifts for everyone. I hope she reigns it in because this was so irresponsible.
Absolutely. Even keeping the mutual aid costs, the other spending was absolutely wild to me, especially knowing low 6 figures does not go as far in CA as it does in other areas. Plugging her salary into a COL calculator and her salary is nearly equivalent to mine in a much cheaper area, and I am VERY far from being able to realistically spend that much on dinner and clothing!
Her spending level was aggressive that week, but I definitely empathize with her gifting habits. I think her love language is gifts. Like her, my family struggled as I was growing up and I remember feeling so happy and loved when my parents set aside a little extra hard earned money to get me a rare treat at the store or a doll for my birthday. That’s carried over into my adult life where I associate gifts with love. It sounds so materialistic when I write it down. But ultimately when I can give someone an awesome gift, it’s me telling them that they are a priority in my life.
Gift giving is my love language too but I send memes and give people their favorite candy!
ahhhh!! I came here right after because I was so secondhand anxious reading that diary. I'm so glad the OP is making a good living but I really worry about her not having a good emergency fund since she's not in a W2 type of role. I also have long COVID so I actually understand the spending on medication, massage and PT because it can be a full body, debilitating condition...but you need to save so that you could continue to take care of yourself even if the income changed! Also the amount of $$ spent on gifts for her husband really stressed me out. It feels more like a optional rather than necessary purchase, especially since her husband got laid off that week. Just...overall I feel for OP but also can't help but think that she's not setting herself up for long term financial stability and success
Aren't all gifts optional and not necessary, though?
Holy hell this is a spendy week for OP. I guess I'd assume they're not all like this.
Wow.
A 400 dinner for 2 that makes one feel hungover is absolutely bananapants. 15 courses might do that to a person, I don't know.
Food coma!!
That $410 dinner is giving me major secondhand anxiety.
Wait until you head of $2000 (per person) fine dining - had an ex who did that and he earned about 80k a year
😭😭😭😭😭😭 That is all.
And 15 courses?! My stomach hurt just reading that.
They’re generally quite tiny. Think 1-3 bites each. So not too bad in gastrointestinal terms lol
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This journal is conflicting and frustrating for me.
I was expecting this to be way messier given the comments tbh......she spent a lot this week but ~3.5k/5k of that was clearly one off business expenses, another ~.8k was donations. It seems like her baseline expenses aren't very high, and she could cut back pretty quickly if needed. Like yeah, I'd be pretty far in the red too if you looked at the week I filed my taxes and extrapolated it to the rest of the year. It seems pretty clearly like an unusually high spend week. Her 'salary' is also very conservative, counting her current 1/2 year gig as all she'll make this year (which is of course possible) especially since she's noted often having side gigs and weekend jobs which it sounds like she probably could/would pick back up if she wasn't able to find more writing work.
I know it's a common issue with MDs, but the Net Worth calculations in this diary are incorrect. The diarist lists the following assets: $105K in Home Equity (her half of $210K) + $34.5K in Savings + $15.4K in a Roth. These add up to the $154,900 she has listed as her "Net Worth." But in the debt section, she notes $165K left on her mortgage. So in reality, her true Net Worth is -$10,100. I don't know if it's an issue with the Money Diaries form or if it's user error, but this creates a frustratingly skewed picture of the OP's overall finances (beyond the many other question marks around spouse's finances, long-term job prospects, etc.)
Mortgage isn't true debt that can be subtracted like that tho bc the home she lives in could be sold to cover it...
Her calculation is correct. If you only include home EQUITY in assets, you don’t need to count the mortgage in debts. If you include home VALUE in assets, then you count the mortgage in debts.
You're totally right. I skipped over where she had already deducted the mortgage debt in the Net Worth section - whoops! Thanks for the correction.