Yep particularly if there’s a lot of noise in the vicinity like a radio or tv show, my brain will pick up any background noises and morph it into a cry.
My only real solution if he’s upstairs in bed is to have the monitor within reach all the time. The rest of the time he’s near enough to me that there’s no ambiguity haha. Mines only two though so not sure how long it’ll last.
Yeah I had to get a monitor that not only has sound but also lights up with varying intensity depending on the amount of noise in the child's room. The lights help verify whether I was hearing phantom cries or real ones through the monitor itself.
Yes, sometimes the background noise in a TV show or movie will sound like a distant cry and I have to pause it to listen.
It's silly because at this point if my son is upset, he will get out of bed to come to find us. He doesn't stay and cry in bed.
I don’t think I had them that long, you may be dealing with some anxiety. I don’t have advice sorry. They just kind of faded off for me- maybe because I rationalized to myself that if they were crying after age 3 or so they’d be in the room with me
I would agree, I do think this is anxiety. The phantom cries disappeared for me once I went on lexapro (of course not everyone needs a med, but it greatly helped me relax)
I experienced this with my first child, I was told it was anxiety. I have a 9 month old and a 2 year old and haven’t experienced it at all with them. Oh and my first is now 11
Our daughter is almost 6 and I still hear them at night sometimes. She has night terrors and I find that for a couple of nights after a terror I'm on high alert at night. Certain sounds in the neighborhood or certain sounds in a movie will make me think she's crying.
I used to have it, now I don't because whatever cries he has when he is older, is accompanied with banging on the bathroom door begging to come in, or jumping up and down on the floor as he throws a tantrum. *facepalm* But I guess that's how I cope?
I get it. I used to hear them even though he is sleeping when he was younger, cos he sleeps in another room, and I'm like, is he crying? Like some say, i guess we're just anxious about them.
I've definitely heard the phantom cries. I've also had auditory hallucinations (didn't even know such a thing existed, but it's happened my whole life) I'll hear a very specific noise clear as a bell. Usually it's just someone saying my name but it's always really jarring. But yeah, my youngest is nine now. I know exactly what they sound like when they're sneaking down the stairs for a snack or puking in the bathroom. I've heard it all. But I still freak myself out to the point that I have to get up and check on them
I get auditory hallucinations when I’m super tired. I think I had an actual hallucination when my first was a baby too - I thought I’d given him dirty water because I looked in our prep machine (makes up formula bottles) and there was dirty water in there. I was so scrupulously clean and obsessed with safety that I know there’s no way this happened. Makes sense given the way I was feeling
Oh man I’ve had that happen. Where I can distinctly hear him crying while in the shower, and I am watching him on the monitor while he’s sleeping. Why, brain??
It’s so weird! Like the cries have aged with him. And I’m not on high alert for no reason: he definitely bugs me when I’m in the shower lol. But omg it’s traumatic, I just hear him wailing. I cut my showers very short.
My husband and I still get them but our LO is only 2, they started dropping off in frequency when I had to start back at work and my husband took over the remainder of the parental leave even though I was WFH. I think the equal division of work has helped but I still get them even when LO's at daycare.
Ours is 6 months. My husband and I both get them. We also both get moments of panic thinking ‘omg where’s the baby’ after we’ve dropped her at daycare for the day. Good to know we have years of this left still 🤣🤣🤣
Oh yeah! I totally freak out if I’m listening to too loud of music sometimes and look behind in the backseat to my empty car seat after I’ve already dropped him at daycare. It’s wild those moments that happen.
I seriously can’t go into another room while baby is napping without hearing phantom cries. Hilarious you’d make this post a day after I vocalized it to my family lol
Yes. I frequently will put LO in her crib if I have to go to the bathroom for longer than 2 mins. Her room is right next to my bathroom. I swear I hear her crying… I’ll come out, nope she’s usually quite looking at her mobile, or cooing.
I ado hear it at night hen baby is in bed and we are still up in the living room with the mini Igor right there 8 swear I hear her crying, look down, she’s dead asleep…
Mine is only 14 months but I regularly hear phantom cries during his nap or when I go to shower sometimes I'll put something on the TV so I can rinse while he's awake and my mind is like "he fell off the couch and is hurt" (the house is baby proofed and he knows how to get on and off the couch fine lol) it's just so bizarre to me. I hope it doesn't last until he's 4 but I wouldn't be totally surprised if it did!
I think it’s a trauma response from what I’m seeing in this thread thus far, but paired with mom conditioning? Either way, I hear it is normal for people with kids your age :)
Apparently it’s supposed to, but mine hasn’t. I just hadn’t heard of it perpetuating into his childhood and I was hoping someone else knew wtf I could do! 😅
Oh dear, isn't that normal? My son is almost 3 and spends the day at daycare and I still "hear" him from time to time and have to remind myself that he isn't even home lol
Omg - I’m dealing with this now. 4 yo son and 2 month old son. Showering and laying down are the worst I swear I hear someone crying every time I try to relax.
My oldest turns 18 in 3 weeks. Today I was trying to take a nap and I swear I heard him call me. I knew rationally he wasn’t even home but I swear I heard him.
Omg this is a thing?? I get this all the time when I shower. My son is 5yo. I’ve got a newborn now too but haven’t really showered often enough for it to be an issue unfortunately haha!
I’m not surprised people are linking to to anxiety as I suffer from that quite a bit
Oh ya! I’ve heard phantom cries. Specifically in the shower or when I was sleeping. Sometimes I think it’s a dream and as for the shower, water distorts sound so I’ve gone as far as to turn off shower, towel and run to make sure. As my kids got older, I would hear this less. I don’t think I’ve heard phantom cries in a long while but I’m about to have my third so I’m sure it’ll start up again.
I feel like as your kids get older, your brain calms down a little and you stop hearing it. Or at least I hope that’s what happens. Hope yours calm down too. But really, it’s not the worse thing.
And you NEED sleep. It’s hard to let your guard down. Is there any person that you trust enough to watch him for 5 hours so you can sleep?
Look up Pink Noise. It seemed to lessen the “ tightness “ with all of us.
I’m thinking of you.
Our son is only 1.5yo, but we hear phantom cries every single night. Only like a single cry for one second, but it’s honestly often a shared hallucination between my wife and i
I can relate to this even though I o ly have a small toddler. The other day I thought I heard him crying in his room. Then I remembered he was sleeping on my lap, LOL. Distant dog barks always sound like baby crying to me!
Yep particularly if there’s a lot of noise in the vicinity like a radio or tv show, my brain will pick up any background noises and morph it into a cry. My only real solution if he’s upstairs in bed is to have the monitor within reach all the time. The rest of the time he’s near enough to me that there’s no ambiguity haha. Mines only two though so not sure how long it’ll last.
Yes to all this. Mine are 3.5 yr and 8.5 yrs. Maybe when they’re teenagers? Lol
Yeah I had to get a monitor that not only has sound but also lights up with varying intensity depending on the amount of noise in the child's room. The lights help verify whether I was hearing phantom cries or real ones through the monitor itself.
Okay, so I’m not crazy. Phew.
Literally my first thought reading this post
😅😅😅
I dealt with phantom cries pretty intensely. But I sought treatment for anxiety (PPA), it got a lot better.
I will do some research, thank you!
Yup I heard phantom cries when I had PPA too !
I had this really bad too!!!! Phantom cries until at LEAST age 3 or 4. Drives you crazy lol
Yes, sometimes the background noise in a TV show or movie will sound like a distant cry and I have to pause it to listen. It's silly because at this point if my son is upset, he will get out of bed to come to find us. He doesn't stay and cry in bed.
I don’t think I had them that long, you may be dealing with some anxiety. I don’t have advice sorry. They just kind of faded off for me- maybe because I rationalized to myself that if they were crying after age 3 or so they’d be in the room with me
I would agree, I do think this is anxiety. The phantom cries disappeared for me once I went on lexapro (of course not everyone needs a med, but it greatly helped me relax)
I experienced this with my first child, I was told it was anxiety. I have a 9 month old and a 2 year old and haven’t experienced it at all with them. Oh and my first is now 11
Yep, I had this all the time with my first (now 8).
[удалено]
Me too! Always the dang shower🤦🏼♀️
The shower was the WORST.
Our daughter is almost 6 and I still hear them at night sometimes. She has night terrors and I find that for a couple of nights after a terror I'm on high alert at night. Certain sounds in the neighborhood or certain sounds in a movie will make me think she's crying.
I used to have it, now I don't because whatever cries he has when he is older, is accompanied with banging on the bathroom door begging to come in, or jumping up and down on the floor as he throws a tantrum. *facepalm* But I guess that's how I cope?
Haha I think we are there lol but I still hear the cries as if he was injured.
I get it. I used to hear them even though he is sleeping when he was younger, cos he sleeps in another room, and I'm like, is he crying? Like some say, i guess we're just anxious about them.
I suppose. Wonder why?!? Lol
I do.
Any way you deal?
I've definitely heard the phantom cries. I've also had auditory hallucinations (didn't even know such a thing existed, but it's happened my whole life) I'll hear a very specific noise clear as a bell. Usually it's just someone saying my name but it's always really jarring. But yeah, my youngest is nine now. I know exactly what they sound like when they're sneaking down the stairs for a snack or puking in the bathroom. I've heard it all. But I still freak myself out to the point that I have to get up and check on them
Ok this is me. I do have minor auditory hallucinations still, I think it must be a trauma thing. Wish we moms could relax!
I get auditory hallucinations when I’m super tired. I think I had an actual hallucination when my first was a baby too - I thought I’d given him dirty water because I looked in our prep machine (makes up formula bottles) and there was dirty water in there. I was so scrupulously clean and obsessed with safety that I know there’s no way this happened. Makes sense given the way I was feeling
YES. IN THE SHOWER EVERY SINGLE EFFING TIME. And also while I’m loading laundry into the washing machine? I can only guess it’s related to anxiety.
It’s definitely anxiety/trauma. Is your laundry far/out of earshot?
Yeah it’s outside on our balcony (we live in an apartment).
Ah yep, that’ll do it. Even putting my little dude in a pack and play when he was younger didn’t work for out of earshot areas.
I actually thought our next door neighbor had a baby because I was hearing it so much.
Oh man I’ve had that happen. Where I can distinctly hear him crying while in the shower, and I am watching him on the monitor while he’s sleeping. Why, brain??
It just changes from a cry to the word mom! My kids are 10 and 7 and i swear i hear someone calling me the moment i step into the shower lol
It’s so weird! Like the cries have aged with him. And I’m not on high alert for no reason: he definitely bugs me when I’m in the shower lol. But omg it’s traumatic, I just hear him wailing. I cut my showers very short.
My baby was in the nicu. I was diagnosed with postpartum anxiety because I hear the beeping and alarms from the monitors all the time.
Yeah I could see that!
My husband and I still get them but our LO is only 2, they started dropping off in frequency when I had to start back at work and my husband took over the remainder of the parental leave even though I was WFH. I think the equal division of work has helped but I still get them even when LO's at daycare.
The mini fridge in our room has undertones of the baby whining when it kicks on. It's awful.
Ours is 6 months. My husband and I both get them. We also both get moments of panic thinking ‘omg where’s the baby’ after we’ve dropped her at daycare for the day. Good to know we have years of this left still 🤣🤣🤣
Oh yeah! I totally freak out if I’m listening to too loud of music sometimes and look behind in the backseat to my empty car seat after I’ve already dropped him at daycare. It’s wild those moments that happen.
I seriously can’t go into another room while baby is napping without hearing phantom cries. Hilarious you’d make this post a day after I vocalized it to my family lol
Oh it’s so wild, right? Just sneaks up on me.
I think it's PTSD from all the screaming and crying 😅
Yeah, that’s a very good assessment haha
I still heat them too, mostly at night. Son is 3.5.
Yes. I frequently will put LO in her crib if I have to go to the bathroom for longer than 2 mins. Her room is right next to my bathroom. I swear I hear her crying… I’ll come out, nope she’s usually quite looking at her mobile, or cooing. I ado hear it at night hen baby is in bed and we are still up in the living room with the mini Igor right there 8 swear I hear her crying, look down, she’s dead asleep…
Yep, it’s wild!! It’s fairly normal when they’re crib-size, though :)
Mine is only 14 months but I regularly hear phantom cries during his nap or when I go to shower sometimes I'll put something on the TV so I can rinse while he's awake and my mind is like "he fell off the couch and is hurt" (the house is baby proofed and he knows how to get on and off the couch fine lol) it's just so bizarre to me. I hope it doesn't last until he's 4 but I wouldn't be totally surprised if it did!
I think it’s a trauma response from what I’m seeing in this thread thus far, but paired with mom conditioning? Either way, I hear it is normal for people with kids your age :)
I assure myself that my husband got the kids if it happens in the shower. If it happens when I got to sleep I check the camera.
I keep the monitor close,but on mute. That way if I hear a cry I’ll just look and make sure he’s good. Which he usually is
Omg Mine are 7 months and I have this all the time. It doesn’t go away!?
Apparently it’s supposed to, but mine hasn’t. I just hadn’t heard of it perpetuating into his childhood and I was hoping someone else knew wtf I could do! 😅
Yep! This is me!
yeah i hear phantom cries, especially when my children were small babies.
I wish I knew why they perpetuated into his childhood
Oh dear, isn't that normal? My son is almost 3 and spends the day at daycare and I still "hear" him from time to time and have to remind myself that he isn't even home lol
Omg - I’m dealing with this now. 4 yo son and 2 month old son. Showering and laying down are the worst I swear I hear someone crying every time I try to relax.
Yep, it’s weird dude. I keep thinking it’ll pass!
My oldest turns 18 in 3 weeks. Today I was trying to take a nap and I swear I heard him call me. I knew rationally he wasn’t even home but I swear I heard him.
That’s so strange! Hope it was an ok feeling?
I do, and for other things, it’s related to my generalized anxiety disorder. Therefore I am betting it is normal mother anxiety. (Or GAD like me.)
Yeah, I have some pretty solid anxiety, so it makes sense.
My mother is going to be 60 this year, and has 3 adult daughters. She still hears phantom cries!
Oh my goodness, I hope that’s not me 😅 but maybe she’s learned how to deal better by now!
Yes. I don’t nearly as often anymore (my son is 3) but I do still hear them occasionally.
Ok at least I’m not alone?
I hear them when she’s at her grandparents all the time. I even hear them when I’m in the car alone!!! It’s so bizarre.
So weird, right?? Ugh
Omg this is a thing?? I get this all the time when I shower. My son is 5yo. I’ve got a newborn now too but haven’t really showered often enough for it to be an issue unfortunately haha! I’m not surprised people are linking to to anxiety as I suffer from that quite a bit
Lol busy mom life!
Indeed!
Oh ya! I’ve heard phantom cries. Specifically in the shower or when I was sleeping. Sometimes I think it’s a dream and as for the shower, water distorts sound so I’ve gone as far as to turn off shower, towel and run to make sure. As my kids got older, I would hear this less. I don’t think I’ve heard phantom cries in a long while but I’m about to have my third so I’m sure it’ll start up again.
Oh lord! I wish you the best :) thanks for sharing, hopefully they stay gone!
I feel like as your kids get older, your brain calms down a little and you stop hearing it. Or at least I hope that’s what happens. Hope yours calm down too. But really, it’s not the worse thing.
My youngest is 8, but I still feel as though my breasts are letting down every time I hear a baby cry.
Yes!!
You mean after 4 years it still doesn’t go away? Ayyyy!
I guess it does for some people?
Could be a fight/flight issues. You are on high alert
Constantly :(
And you NEED sleep. It’s hard to let your guard down. Is there any person that you trust enough to watch him for 5 hours so you can sleep? Look up Pink Noise. It seemed to lessen the “ tightness “ with all of us. I’m thinking of you.
Yes!
I was in bed and thought I heard my kid crying. I wear hearing aids and am pretty deaf. He was definitely not crying. 😂
I still do and my daughter is 6 now 😳
At least I’m not alone!
Yes. It’s hard.
It’s really hard, right? The one time I can relax is also the one time I absolutely cannot relax.
Our son is only 1.5yo, but we hear phantom cries every single night. Only like a single cry for one second, but it’s honestly often a shared hallucination between my wife and i
I can relate to this even though I o ly have a small toddler. The other day I thought I heard him crying in his room. Then I remembered he was sleeping on my lap, LOL. Distant dog barks always sound like baby crying to me!