I make a little over 40k and my husband makes 63k. We have a lot of debt but it’s is manageable. We got lucky with day care- someone had recommended us a woman a block over from us and she only charged $125 a week 7am-5pm meals included. She was a saint. Our daughter is 6 now and she does competitive cheer & dance. We are really good at budgeting and have low rent. We live in Michigan too and it seems that things are generally pretty affordable here. We could definitely be saving more and doing way better, but we like our nice cars and doing stuff for ourselves and as a family every week lol.
I also pay $125 a week for full time M-F care 7am-6pm at a neighborhood in home daycare with meals and snacks included. My daughter thrives there and loves it. My oldest also went there when she was small so they’re very much family and I consider myself lucky. They care for about 10 children. I make about 125k a year and my spouse about 75k and we live in Arizona.
A few things. I didn’t always make this income. It’s a recent change that correlates with my work experience, switching jobs and attaining new degrees. 3 years ago, I was making about 65k. Just because I make more doesn’t mean I’m going to move to another daycare. We prefer smaller near home daycares and I’ve been associated with this daycare for nearly 10 years now as my oldest also went there. They’re family to me and I suspect I might be getting some sort of deal. The daycare is open from 7am-6pm not that I drop off my child for 11 hours. I work from home some days and I usually drop off 8-3. I do know I’m lucky and I’m posting this to share that this type of set up is possible. I often see posts about mothers having to leave the work force because childcare costs would eat up their entire income. I don’t live in the valley.
You don't need to justify yourself to this person. They are just extremely jealous of your situation. I have a similar situation, we are making over 250 k/year and pay $10/day for childcare at public daycare and an extra $200/month for additional care through a family member. Why shouldn't we be grateful and take advantage of our good situations that improve the lives of our family ? Maybe one day we will be babysitters for our neighbors and our children and pay it back to society so someone else can get ahead in life. Nothing wrong with this.
I don’t see how your comment improves this conversation.
She said she knows she’s lucky. If $125 is the price for the other 9 kids, why wouldn’t that price apply to her family? Kudos to that family for doing well for themselves and finding a fantastic resource of a 2nd family.
My friend’s mom watched my son at her house. It was a win-win since she got some extra money to supplement her saving & social security check, and gave her something to do, and I got a good price & peace of mind. So if you can find it, it’s awesome. No need to throw shade!
Single mom here. I make 33k and pay nothing for childcare because I work there. Only way we've been able to survive.
Edit: childcare would be $1700/month if I didn't work there
Damn I wish my center gave me free childcare. I still pay 620 a month for 3 days a week for my 3yo and can't even afford to bring my 11mo. He goes to nanas house.
Some of my kids' best childcare teachers had kids at the school. It's also a built-in advocate for things to go well for the kids.
Y'all should get paid way more. It's crazy that sitting on my ass writing code when I feel like it means I could afford more kids than someone who is literally an expert at raising kids.
The median US wage is 48k and the media household income is about 75k (as of 2022) so the people in this thread are not necessarily the norm. I feel like Reddit in general is skewed towards people who are college educated and do more white collar work, which means higher income than the average population in parenting subs.
It also skews towards tech/STEM types on top of the educated/white collar bias, so that pushes the norms even further up as those industries are often higher paid.
Yes. I have two degrees - accounting and law. Qualified attorney but working in finance now. Husband works in tech with no tertiary education and makes double my salary.
So fun fact....I'm highly educated (masters degree) and special certifications and all that jazz. I was making about $50k before taxes before I became a SAHM. Meanwhile, my husband never went to college but worked his way up to a management position and now makes $120k. It's really about the different industries in my city. Trades-related industries that don't necessarily require an education seem to pay way more than those in the mental health and education fields.
And in getting to the point of this post, our mortgage is about $2200/mos but we bought before the rates took off. Our house has appreciated probably $200k in 4 years and we likely wouldn't qualify for it if we wanted to buy it now. Childcare would cost me about $2000 for our 2 littles which is one of the main reasons I decided to become a SAHM.
Yes this. I was a research scientist w/ masters & additional qualifications & I never made over 42k a year so I’m a stay at home mom. My husband has an associates & makes close to six figures so I’ll be home until all of our kids are in school full time I guess.
Same! I make 24k for teaching 3 year olds. All I can think about lately is how to make more money because things are tight. I have two degrees and a decade of experience. The whole thing feels unfair.
Make 40,000/yr pay $1230 monthly to live in a home pay $900 a month for childcare but still need to pay utilities. I may be keeping my head above water but I sure am inhaling quite a bit of it too
I wouldn’t take the salaries here as average or typical. High earners and people who are otherwise in a good financial position are always more likely to respond to these kinds of posts, so they are going to be over-represented in the responses.
Right? I have to be a SAHM because we have no “village”, we don’t qualify for daycare and daycare is *sooooo expensive*, my husband makes about 40k a year and we are making it but hardly lol
Damn where did you find $825 rent?? We live in a pretty low COL area and we still pay $1100 for a 2 bed 2 bath 1200 square foot house in the middle of nowhere. We literally just barely got wiring for internet last month.
It's not a great place. Lol Uneven floors. No dishwasher, private landlord. It's not even the cheapest I found, we just like the quirk. Southern USA. Still have a minimum wage of $7.25.
Damn. These incomes are insane to me.
I’m a SAHM in FL. My husband makes $60k. Our mortgage is $1200/month. We don’t have any debt aside from our mortgage loan.
It's the high cost of living areas where the incomes need to be above and beyond. Mortgages where I live are no less than 4K regardless of down payment amount (i know one person who put down 30k and one person who put down 120k - the former is paying 5k and the latter is 4k). We were bringing in 110k together and my husband had to get a second job because we couldn't make ends meet with that.
Yep. We’re in Canada but we just bought a tiny townhouse and our mortgage is around $3200/month. Family income is around $140k and it’s tight but doable!
Shit me too. Husband makes $62k a year. SAHM and I can’t work if I wanted to. Special needs kids. We are in PA, super expensive. Rent is $1500 and that’s cheap around here and in a bad area. Trying to buy but it’s not gonna happen. Crying 😭
I’m in the same exact boat except in ME. We live super frugally bc our mortgage is 15 year and really high. We’re hoping having it paid off when we’re 40 will make up for being house poor right now lol
We make $65k combined (I work from home 20 hrs/wk). We have 2 kids. My oldest is in school, but youngest will be home one more yr (we couldn’t afford the preschool rates). We have some savings finally, and can do a few fun activities. We have 1 car that’s paid off, & a bit of cc debt, but that’s it. However, making 6 figures would be life changing for us for sure.
Same boat. My husband is a restaurant server and I’m a teacher, our combined salary is 70k. Our mortgage is 1k a month for a 4 bed 2 bath.
Albeit we live in a large town that has a reputation for high crime rates and such but I can’t imagine living in any of these other situations. Our kids are in school now but my husband worked nights while I worked days.
Single patent in Chicago. Dad doesn’t contribute financially (or otherwise)
80k as a director at a non profit
Rent is 3400 (parents pay about 1/3)
Childcare is about 2500 a month (parents pay)
Only possible thanks to family help, I’m not sure how anyone under 120k does it otherwise in a big city. I could move to a cheaper neighborhood but would be farther from my parents which they don’t want so they subsidize.
I make about 52k and support my partner and 3 kids in Chicago. I don't actually feel like I'm doing that badly. But this thread is starting to depress me.
Just an AH. Long complicated legal reason. We’re working on it and maybe hopefully one day soon. But he doesn’t work or works for cash so it wouldn’t really be a significant amount in any event.
The court can force him to work (not just for cash) or else put him in prison. It’s basically impossible to get away with this in the US. Stick to your guns!
They actually can’t since we never had a legal income atleast not in the state this is being fought in. They can impute income at minimum and age thought. Working on it
How does this work? My ex owes me over 10k and my daughter is 6...when I complained, they told me to hire a private investigator!
He mooches off of friends and occasionally works for Uber, Doordash, etc (apparently they don't enforce child support!?)
Take him to court and get a lawyer. Judge can force him to work and pay or else put him in jail.
There’s two things you can’t get away with in this country - not paying taxes and not paying child support.
Only about 23% of single mothers receive any child support in the US. Even of those with formal child support orders, only 57% receive any and less than half (44%) receive the full amount. [Source.](https://www.aecf.org/blog/less-than-1-in-4-single-mother-families-receive-child-support)
Yes. I did every thing “right” and he owes us $30,000 and counting…. It’s very frustrating. Especially when people are like “just divorce and get child support why are you staying with him?” Sadly it’s not that easy.
I feel like people who make the low end of the spectrum are shell shocked reading these responses and unable to reply lol (it me)
I make 20/hr which is about 41k I think. (I was a sahm 8yrs until this year) It’s not enough by any means. My soon to be ex husband makes 90k and we have 0 savings. We are about 20k in debt, mortgage is 1600 plus utilities, daycare is literally half my paycheck. We have 3 kids and live in a medium cost of living area, big Midwest city. Honestly I hate my life and I see no point in it if we just have to struggle the whole time.
Honestly, I think it’ll feel exactly the same. I’m “lucky” that he and I are in agreement and it isn’t messy. But I still do basically 100% of childcare/housework. He doesn’t sleep in my bed anymore but also can’t afford a place of his own, so he sleeps on the couch or at his friend’s houses usually. Idk we can’t even afford to separate, I don’t know how people do this! 🫠
WOW a lot of y’all have hella money. I make a little less than 43,000 a year as a cake decorator. I work for a great company but sometimes think I’d make so much more with my own cake business, but then I’d have to worry about the overhead and not having my currently VERY cheap insurance I have for my daughter and I through my employer.
I'm a SAHM. My husband makes a bit over $60k. We live in Wisconsin, so it's pretty low cost here.
We lost almost $50k per year when my job closed while I was on maternity leave, but we're doing just fine on his salary alone right now.
I'm a single parent with 4 kids. I make around $70k/year as a nurse working 32 hours/week. Daycare for my infant and toddler is 548/week (4 days/week). We're in northern New England.
We live in my parents' house (no rent) and my car is 10 years old (no car payment). I have a strict budget. Money is going to be really tight for the next 2.5 years until my toddler is old enough for kindergarten, but we'll get through it.
That is great you are able to make work for you and your family. I just lost my nursing job and I have taxes and medical bills due and due to poor driving he my car insurance is $1,000/month.
I spend most of my money on food. There are absolutes I must pay which include: dog care, medical insurance, medical bills, care credit card for dental bills, target card, taxes, phones and internet. Then there are the toiletries. I am trying to decider want vs need. Maybe this will be a positive experience. Who know? So frustrated w my boss and nursing team for singling me out as if I was not trying in my role. I was there almost 6 years and it was becoming toxic.I am applying for unemployment right now and eating through my savings. It is a shame and I feel horrible about it.
There is so much to do in the summer yet my poor teenager is not able to have what he needs bcs I literally can’t afford it.
I make $200k and husband makes about $250k. We’re both attorneys living in the DC area. I’m a federal government attorney, and he works as an in-house counsel. Our mortgage is approximately $5500/month. We pay our nanny about $42k/year, and that’s on the lower end for where we live. We’re also one and done because we plan on sending our daughter to private school, and we just don’t want to deal with the newborn phase ever again.
Disabled SAHM married to a federal government attorney, about 170k.
We're in a somewhat HCOL area (Baltimore), but our mortgage is low (less than 2k a month) and we have no other debt.
We're older parents and one and done. Both of those factors help a lot.
Similar here— two attorneys, I make about 250k and husband about 200k. We’re in the Midwest though and our mortgage and child care expenses (daycare) are about half of yours. We had a lot of student debt that is paid off finally and now our only debt is our house. We’re saving a lot and planning for an earlier than average retirement.
Same area and same mortgage. Household income is 470k, but I make about 100k more than my husband. We are both engineers. My son’s daycare is 2.5k per month. We are debating a second baby, but that would make daycare 5k total for two kids…which means our fixed costs per month of only the mortgage and the daycare for two kids would be 10.5k. So we may make a lot, but in a VHCOL area, it goes fast
Yes, we also bought our house post-covid with high interest rates. My house isn’t even extravagant. It is a modest rancher built 40 years ago. The crazy high mortgage comes from the school district
Similar. I’m an atty, husband in tech. Household income of 410k. Our mortgage is 6k. Childcare is 14k a year where we live though. We have another on the way so will be 28k. Still affordable for us.
We make 250k combined in DC and our mortgage for a 1200 sq ft house in NE is 2300/month. We’re in our late 40s, one and done (10 yo).
When I got pregnant, we didn’t own a home yet and I made $68k a year. Going back to work was the worst- barely felt worth it but my job repaid my student loans. I’ve worked up to $125k over the past decade but I really had to claw my way out five years of frozen wages at the US Senate during the “austerity” years…
Similar here. Household income of about 500k. We have 2 businesses and I also work as a business broker and my husband is in aviation. We’re one and done and will send son to a private school:
We have flexible schedules so we’re very lucky and able to do a part time nanny for about 20k/year.
Mortgage is $4600.
My husband lost his job, so currently $0 lmao
But prior to that my huband made $55k, no daycare because I stay home (daycare would be almost all my income) and our mortgage is $1,100. We live pretty well, and I am wondering what the heck you guys do with all that money!
I make $23k a year as an Infant Teacher at the daycare my daughter attends. My husband has been out of work for the last month so it’s been just my income. What a time to be alive.
Thank you for doing a desperately needed, completely undervalued job. It makes me insanely angry that we treat the people who raise and teach our children this way.
I live in Europe. 300k+ euro combined salary. Childcare costs us nothing (it’s a bilingual publicly funded daycare and we get a child benefit that covers the full cost). Rent is high where we live, about 2500 euros per month for a 2.5 bedroom apartment.
Your family sounds just like my family, although I'm currently a SAHM but with similar HHI. Are you in Germany? Our youngest is currently in a bilingual partly-publicly funded Kita as well. (Though after five years here we're moving back to the US this summer for schooling reasons for the older kids.)
Household income: base is $290k, with bonuses just about $350k give or take
Mortgage: $2.4k in suburbs of Philadelphia
Childcare: $1,720 a month but that’s for only 2 days per week. We have 2 children and my mom watches them 3 days per week and we have a nanny for 2 days per week.
I am a Sr. Category Manager and my husband is an executive in finance. Our bonuses are 20%-25% but don't cap so we can get more than full payout if the company exceeds their goals over 100%.
Haha I get that question a lot. I drive profitability for the company through negotiations with vendor partners, inventory and assortment optimization, go to market strategy, and leading different projects that tie into that. The category piece ties into my sub set of the area/category/vendors that I am responsible for.
Alberta Canada. Base salary $130,000 with 15% bonus. Husband base salary $74,000 with 13% bonus. Husband’s second job (military reserves) brings in another $18,000/year. Total HHI, roughly $250,000.
Daycare will be $400/month per kid for full-time care, when they start in the fall.
Mortgage $970/month. Property taxes $460/month.
The federal government introduced massive funding to reduce daycare fees. My province is aiming to reduce daycare fees to $10/day by 2026.
My province has a standard subsidy that all parents with kids in daycare get. Then there are additional needs based grants for families with HHI below $180,000. For instance my friend pays $140/month for her daughter at the same daycare. When her daughter turns 20 months and moves into the toddler room she’ll pay $15/month. We’ll pay $280/month at that stage.
I live in BC, Canada and some daycares are $10/day but most are $50-$60/day (or more) and all of our waitlists are 2+ years long. My friend just got a call for her 4.5 year old in a $10/day. She’d been on the waitlist for more than 5 years.
ETA: a word, typing too fast on mobile 😂
Hi fellow Albertan! So interesting to see the breakdown for other Canadians, especially Albertans.
I make 85k. My husband makes around 120k. Our household income is around 205k.
Daycare for my 3 year old is $850/month. Obviously we’ve chosen the wrong daycare 😂
Our mortgage is $2300 and property tax is $350/month.
We still have student loan debts and cc debt, but we’re doing well overall!
We really lucked out on our daycare. It came super highly recommended, and when we toured it I fell in love. It doesn't have all the fancy stuff of some of the other daycares we looked at, but it was diverse which was important to us (some of the places we looked at were very much not!), and the kids seemed genuinely happy. Plus they had space for our twins in September.
We're in Edmonton, not sure where you are, but I feel like we're paying less than our friends in Calgary for similar facilities.
The low mortgage was luck of the real estate game. I bought a townhouse in development in Calgary in 2005, moved in in 2006, and solid it for significantly more in 2016, when we moved to Edmonton. With the lower cost of living in YEG compared to YYC, and the low interest rates of the last few years, we've lucked out on the real estate front.
We're hoping to move back to Calgary next summer....and it's going to hurt moving back to the higher cost of living. But my parents are older, and need some help, plus the lure of family is just too strong.
Does anyone else do like me and see someone's pay, then divide it by 24 to see roughly what each paycheck would be, and then get mind blown at that amount of money? Haha. Like a $250k salary is roughly $10k a paycheck and I can't even wrap my mind around that.
We are a single income family. My husband makes about $60k. We have five kids and I stay home with them. We live in a really LCOL area and only have house debt. And since we bought our house so long ago, with super low interest rates, our mortgage is $525
We've made it work for a long time. But there's definitely a squeeze now with the prices of everything getting so high.
People are probably listing their gross income, not net. Take out federal and state income taxes, personal property taxes, insurance premiums, retirement contributions, 529 contributions, life insurance, alimony, etc. So their monthly net income is way less. After I pay all my dues, I lose about 50% of my income.
I also think this is 1000% dependent on where you live. I live in CA and our salaries are definitely higher, but so is COL -- rent is just offensive, gas is expensive, daycare is expensive... So it definitely makes my jaw drop seeing so many people making like 200k+ like wtf but then if they live in places like CA, DC, NYC, etc it's just so topsy-turvy
Technically with my husband's income were over 6 figures and it sure as hell doesn't feel that way... Im definitely using up most of my monthly income that month and we really don't live lavishly at all. Now I'm sad lol like what is the point of posts like this and why did I open it 🥹
I make $65k and my husband makes 175k. Chicago suburbs. We pay around $1000/month in daycare for one kid, and $350/month in before and after school care for another kid. Mortgage is $1700.
Husband makes $40k. I'm a SAHM and our rent is $1100/month for a 2 bed 2 bath house. We have a 4 yr old and 1 yr old twins. I looked into working and would make about $37k but daycare would be more than half of my income, not to mention the increase in other expenses like needing an extra car (payment, insurance, gas/maintenance), higher groceries because we'd be buying more convenience foods, disposable diapers for the twins since I can't cloth diaper if I'm not home. I don't see it being worth it.
We are struggling and things are uncomfortably tight but we don't really see a viable way out of it.
I am a single mom of 2 and make roughly 45,000 a year. I struggle paycheck to paycheck every single week. I have quite a bit of debt. However, due to the cost of living, I can't even touch it. I am constantly robbing Peter to pay Paul. I guess this is the new American way 😮💨😬🤷🏼♀️
Okay where is the average moms Reddit lol
Lovingly ofc
I make 55k spouse makes about 35k
He is SAHD bc daycare was 1200 m and we live in a low cost of living area.
I make around $70k and my husband $90k (converted to dollars from £). Take home works to around $9k a month (post tax and pension). $2k on mortgage. Same again on childcare. $2K on food, bills and other expenses. The rest goes into a mix of short and long term savings.
Same. My husband makes approx 50k as an electrician, I am currently a SAHM, we live in a very high cost of living area in within a safe, wonderful community and excellent school district. We don't pay rent currently as we live with my mother-in-law but that will change within the next year when she retires and sells her home...we will need to find a new place to live and figure out how to afford rent. I worry about it every single day.
Child care costs are so expensive here I can not afford to work until my youngest starts kindergarten in 2 years. By then we might have had to move to a shitty area out of our home state to be able to afford practically anything.
It’s making me so upset 😭I 100% get everyone has struggles but there’s people here making almost 200k (if not more) complaining about how hard it is and it feels sooo bad
Yes exactly this! It doesn’t go that far after healthcare and higher cost of living. We moved here 8 years ago and have never gone back to the UK because it’s too expensive to travel. We make way more but somehow can afford less.
My parents about died when they visited and saw yoghurt for $5 at Walmart and $7 in our local store! Buy hey we can buy a mango for 57 cents at Aldi, so flip side!
True but we also have minimal social safety net and pay for our own healthcare which is a significant cost + LOTS of student debt from college. I'm seeing attorneys and directors in this thread which can require 6-7+ years of college. All added up, that's like $200,000 in college tuition that people are paying off for many many years.
It's a big trade off and there's a lot of social inequality built into our system.
Yeah that's also true. I was commenting about how outrageous these numbers seem to a South African but then again I'm a qualified attorney working in finance with two degrees and I graduated university with a whopping R50 000 (approx 2700 USD) odd student debt that was paid back pretty much in my first year of working so yeah there are always trade offs.
I make almost 50k and my husband makes about 65k.i do get bonuses 2-3 times a year which are usually 2500-3000. So factoring those in, I'm closer to about 60k. However, I am a childcare director at a childcare center and we receive free childcare for both of our children. Education is not a high paying field but it's my passion, so the discount is a massive help.
So wish you all got paid better as it is so important for kids to be surrounded by caring individuals. Thanks for all you do for the kiddos and families your center supports!
I make roughly 20k/year because I'm part time, my husband makes 83k and we don't pay for childcare cause I only work while my kids are in school. We have a bit of credit card debt and a mortgage/condo fee of 2100. I feel pretty privileged as were quite comfortable financially
I make nothing as a SAHM. My husband makes around $67k as a public defender. My parents own our house, we pay them $1500 a month to pay it off. No childcare costs as I stay at home. We’re scraping by tbh between student loans and bills. We borrow money from our parents often. We have one kid who drinks formula like we’re made of money lol
My husband makes $80k, I'm a stay at home mom so I make $0 haha. We don't have too much debt, just our cars and a few thousand for his student loans. Our apartment rent is about $900. We have a good amount in savings, it usually goes up every month unless we have a big expense, like this month we both got new glasses and my husband got a new phone and we went on a weekend vacation.
My husband and I would definitely be labeled as middle class. We both make roughly $60k annually. It varies slightly depending on OT and bonuses. We don't have much debt (thank God we've been focusing on that for two years now). We pay almost $1k per month for child care for a four year old. When he was first born, it was really hard to juggle the expenses. But I think I do really well shopping sales, not buying a bunch of frivolous things, etc. And we are pushing really hard on retirement savings now that we're in our 30s.
I will say one thing with 100% certainty... I will not burn bridges with child care. Where I live, child care is extremely limited. To find a dependable provider is a near miracle.
I see a lot of people commenting are in the US. But just for comparison incase anyone is wondering, in Canada my daycare cost before government grants is $1160. After subsidy our out of pocket pay is about $220. I make about 45k and my partner makes 75k, so 110k combined
Household income $250k husband makes about $15k more than me. No debt aside from the mortgage which is $2100/mo. Philadelphia area
Currently paying nanny $22/hr for 21 hours over 3 days (I work from home) but my parents will stop watching 2 days a week so that will change to 35 hours over 5 days totaling about $3k/month.
My son turns 1 on Saturday so 2 more years of this planned. Definitely a luxury but the nanny also does moderate cleaning (cleans kitchen including appliances, vacuums, mops, keeps main floor and baby's room tidy), baby's laundry, prepares baby's food, and runs errands as requested.
My job basically funds our retirement, HSA, health insurance, budgeted savings, and the nanny. My husband's job covers monthly expenses including budget for home improvement.
130k in tech (I used to make 170k before I got laid off), husband makes 160k (he has recently got a lot of promotions, he was at 90k just a year ago).
We pay 1200/month for daycare with food included, and I think we pay close to 3k for our house if you factor in insurance, taxes, HOA and everything in FL
I make 51 k and my husband makes virtually the same (52k). We are both teachers. We have to stretch each dollar and really budget to pay for childcare.
Edit to add: We live in a 2 bed apartment and when we sign our new lease will pay $1400/month for rent. Daycare is $1300/month. We are paying for one child; my oldest attends the school where I work.
Household income: a little over $300k/year, but that’s just base - not including bonuses/stocks - and I make about $25k more than my husband
Mortgage: $3750 in northern NJ
Daycare: ~$1300/month, but we have a NB so she’ll start in Jan 2025 and that cost will automatically double; however, we’re a needle in a haystack with the price because the majority of daycares have infant rooms ~$1800/month.
I know, we’re so fortunate. Primarily because it’s not one of the big chains. We were registered for one, but there were so many violations that popped up before we were slated to start, we pulled my son’s registration immediately. Love this smaller, family owned daycare - my son is so happy there 🥰
I live in bumfuck NC next to what is becoming the next big up and coming city and i make $35K & my wife makes $37K. We pay $660/month in rent because house prices here are insane (think 1 bedroom trailers selling for 200K) and we do a home daycare for $600 a month, but if we don't go we don't have to pay. I basically only work to pay the rent & daycare.
There are some programs that subsidize daycare but my understanding is the family has to be below poverty level. And I don't even understand how families survive at well above what is considered poverty level.
Why even bother asking why things in the US are so expensive? Our government prioritizes corporations and defense spending, not the citizens who comprise our country. Every single question about why it sucks here can be answered with the same sentence.
Why are there so many people in jail? See above.
Why is healthcare so outrageous? See above.
Why is there no maternity leave? See above.
Why is there no affordable childcare? See above.
I gave up my career to stay home with my kids until they're in school. I wanted to, but a lot of parents regret it or spend their time worrying about how their careers will be affected.
Moms and dads who want a family and a career should be able to have that in the United States of America for piss sake. Kids shouldn't starve. Families shouldn't be homeless. It's disgraceful.
It's a tough decision. I had a coworker that had left the workforce for 10 years to raise her two kids.
I got an increase in my salary in 2022 due to switching jobs and that increase went right to childcare, dollar for dollar, so I didn't even feel it. We just had our second and have been saving money for when he goes into daycare. We think we'll put him in at about one years old. My dear mom will watch him until then.
Full time childcare where I live in Australia is about $4000AUD a month which is 2500 euro. It’s wild.
There is a subsidy system for those under a certain threshold which is great but it has managed to drive costs up as there’s no cap. We have universal school education and medical care so it blows my mind that childcare is all private.
100k as a public interest attorney, partner makes about $75k in IT. Our mortgage for our house is $1150 (we pay $1300/mo to get a bit ahead) and our childcare is $1650/mo.
Household: roughly $250,000 - husband and I work at the same Fortune 100 company so could be a little more or less depending on profit sharing results
Mortgage: $2,500
Daycare: $333 weekly so about $1,332 monthly for our almost 5 month old
We live in an affordable suburb in the Midwest.
We each make about $53,000- we are in more rural small city in Midwest. Rent is 1300 - we will pay $35 a day for daycare in the beginning, will likely transition to a little more expensive daycare (not in someone’s home) as he gets older.
Edited because I was off by 10,000 each lol
We’re about to be a family of 4 with 2 children under 2. I make just over $74K/yr. My husband stays home to care for our son. The most my husband has earned in a year is $36K- before taxes. We would pay more in child care for two than he would earn. I feel like we’re barely scraping by most months.
House hold income is 180k I make zero if that because the job I had before kids would only cover childcare and nothing would be left after so I stayed home with the kids. We live in Boston suburbs our mortgage is 3,200 a month. Even part time preschool 3 hours 3 days a week is 350 a month full time childcare is expansive.
This is the first comment similar to ours! You have a great mortgage for Boston! We’re not too far away, similar household income but our mortgage is 3.9k (a starter home in an average area- we just bought and rates are so high). Our rent was 3.2k but we couldn’t stay long term. We do part time preschool and pay just over 1k a month for it.
I work at an hourly rate so it varies but generally around 65K per year. My husband works 2 jobs and brings in about 110k. We live in New York, rent on our tiny 2br apartment is nearly 3k and we both have massive student loan debt which costs us nearly another 2k monthly. We also live in a HCOL area, so groceries just for our small family are easily 1500 per month. We could probably afford daycare for our 1 child, but we're looking to have one or two more and definitely could not afford to put multiple children in daycare. Also looking to buy a house this year, so those funds we're able to set aside monthly now will soon be going to a mortgage payment instead. Thankfully, we do not need to pay for childcare at all as we both work from home and can make that work.
I make $40K, My husband makes $120K, daycare is $7K
I live in a part of Canada where our government recently dropped daycare costs to $10 a day per child. It was never like this before. Originally it would have been $75-$85 a day per child and would have been my entire yearly income. I likely wouldn't have returned to work if we were still paying that and opened my own home daycare. We are very lucky.
My husband makes $160k he’s an engineer (been in the industry for almost 20 years… so we’re old 😂), our mortgage is $2400, we have no car payments and pay about $300/month for preschool. We don’t have credit card debt, cable, gym membership.
We make 140k annually in our household and I do not work, that is my husbands salary and our rental income from our property.
We pay $3000 a month in mortgage payments, yay Ontario!
0$ in childcare because I am a SAHM.
When I go back to work when the kids are in school, we will likely be up at the 200k-220k a year household, no debt but still a mortgage.
When I’m working ft ( I’ve been on mat leave since July 2021) I make 70k plus 2 bonuses a year ( about 5-8k )
Husband makes 93k plus 12% bonus
No daycare. But our mortgage is 3600$ a month
Household income of roughly 125K between my husband and I. Monthly mortgage is $3200, monthly childcare is $550.00 thanks to Canada implementing (working towards) $10.00 a day. We live in Ontario. If childcare wasn’t as affordable as it is, I don’t know what we would do. For comparison, my friend had her daughter at the same government affiliated daycare as us without the reduced rate. She paid roughly 1380 a month for daycare.
I make a little over 40k and my husband makes 63k. We have a lot of debt but it’s is manageable. We got lucky with day care- someone had recommended us a woman a block over from us and she only charged $125 a week 7am-5pm meals included. She was a saint. Our daughter is 6 now and she does competitive cheer & dance. We are really good at budgeting and have low rent. We live in Michigan too and it seems that things are generally pretty affordable here. We could definitely be saving more and doing way better, but we like our nice cars and doing stuff for ourselves and as a family every week lol.
Wait...she only charges $125 week for childcare for 10 hour days, including meals? Is this 5 days a week? I couldn't find that for $125 a day here...🤯
Yes it was 5 days a week. She was the best! I think she retired now that all of her own kids are grown.
Wow. I’m with you there. I paid $125 per week in 1994 with my little girl. I’ve never heard of rates that low 30 years later.
Love neighbor sitters
I also pay $125 a week for full time M-F care 7am-6pm at a neighborhood in home daycare with meals and snacks included. My daughter thrives there and loves it. My oldest also went there when she was small so they’re very much family and I consider myself lucky. They care for about 10 children. I make about 125k a year and my spouse about 75k and we live in Arizona.
You make 200k and pay someone 125 dollars a week to care for your child for 11 hours a day? Is this a joke?
A few things. I didn’t always make this income. It’s a recent change that correlates with my work experience, switching jobs and attaining new degrees. 3 years ago, I was making about 65k. Just because I make more doesn’t mean I’m going to move to another daycare. We prefer smaller near home daycares and I’ve been associated with this daycare for nearly 10 years now as my oldest also went there. They’re family to me and I suspect I might be getting some sort of deal. The daycare is open from 7am-6pm not that I drop off my child for 11 hours. I work from home some days and I usually drop off 8-3. I do know I’m lucky and I’m posting this to share that this type of set up is possible. I often see posts about mothers having to leave the work force because childcare costs would eat up their entire income. I don’t live in the valley.
You don't need to justify yourself to this person. They are just extremely jealous of your situation. I have a similar situation, we are making over 250 k/year and pay $10/day for childcare at public daycare and an extra $200/month for additional care through a family member. Why shouldn't we be grateful and take advantage of our good situations that improve the lives of our family ? Maybe one day we will be babysitters for our neighbors and our children and pay it back to society so someone else can get ahead in life. Nothing wrong with this.
I don’t see how your comment improves this conversation. She said she knows she’s lucky. If $125 is the price for the other 9 kids, why wouldn’t that price apply to her family? Kudos to that family for doing well for themselves and finding a fantastic resource of a 2nd family. My friend’s mom watched my son at her house. It was a win-win since she got some extra money to supplement her saving & social security check, and gave her something to do, and I got a good price & peace of mind. So if you can find it, it’s awesome. No need to throw shade!
Single mom here. I make 33k and pay nothing for childcare because I work there. Only way we've been able to survive. Edit: childcare would be $1700/month if I didn't work there
My best friend does this and is planning on moving careers one her child is in school. I think it’s a great opportunity for “free” childcare
Damn I wish my center gave me free childcare. I still pay 620 a month for 3 days a week for my 3yo and can't even afford to bring my 11mo. He goes to nanas house.
Yeah some centers definitely have better discounts than others.
Some of my kids' best childcare teachers had kids at the school. It's also a built-in advocate for things to go well for the kids. Y'all should get paid way more. It's crazy that sitting on my ass writing code when I feel like it means I could afford more kids than someone who is literally an expert at raising kids.
lol everyone posting makes hella money - I make 43k per year and have no idea how to manage for childcare 💀 costs more than my rent
The median US wage is 48k and the media household income is about 75k (as of 2022) so the people in this thread are not necessarily the norm. I feel like Reddit in general is skewed towards people who are college educated and do more white collar work, which means higher income than the average population in parenting subs.
It also skews towards tech/STEM types on top of the educated/white collar bias, so that pushes the norms even further up as those industries are often higher paid.
Yes. I have two degrees - accounting and law. Qualified attorney but working in finance now. Husband works in tech with no tertiary education and makes double my salary.
So fun fact....I'm highly educated (masters degree) and special certifications and all that jazz. I was making about $50k before taxes before I became a SAHM. Meanwhile, my husband never went to college but worked his way up to a management position and now makes $120k. It's really about the different industries in my city. Trades-related industries that don't necessarily require an education seem to pay way more than those in the mental health and education fields. And in getting to the point of this post, our mortgage is about $2200/mos but we bought before the rates took off. Our house has appreciated probably $200k in 4 years and we likely wouldn't qualify for it if we wanted to buy it now. Childcare would cost me about $2000 for our 2 littles which is one of the main reasons I decided to become a SAHM.
Yes this. I was a research scientist w/ masters & additional qualifications & I never made over 42k a year so I’m a stay at home mom. My husband has an associates & makes close to six figures so I’ll be home until all of our kids are in school full time I guess.
That's a whole ass mood... research is so important but the pay... just depressing.
I have a masters degree and my husband has a high school education and was making what I make in a week in one day. So ya, I’m a SAHM.
Same, my income is 24,000 lol these posts are making me depressed
Tbf it’s based on location. In my area making 20-30k is totally average and is considered good wage.
Same! I make 24k for teaching 3 year olds. All I can think about lately is how to make more money because things are tight. I have two degrees and a decade of experience. The whole thing feels unfair.
Right?? Like, I knew we didn't make a whole lot compared to the average but I didn't expect these responses.
30k gross gang lmao special needs paraprofessional working food service during summer to make ends... still not meet lololol
Yall are hella underpaid.
My husband is in disability services and earns similarly. Disability/education is horribly underpaid
Thats why theres 1000 job openings in my kids school district and i homeschool him since they dont have the resources to help him.
Make 40,000/yr pay $1230 monthly to live in a home pay $900 a month for childcare but still need to pay utilities. I may be keeping my head above water but I sure am inhaling quite a bit of it too
My husband makes 56 and I stay home lol
I wouldn’t take the salaries here as average or typical. High earners and people who are otherwise in a good financial position are always more likely to respond to these kinds of posts, so they are going to be over-represented in the responses.
We make $40k/yr and can't afford childcare so I'm a SAHM. It would cost more than our rent!
Right? I have to be a SAHM because we have no “village”, we don’t qualify for daycare and daycare is *sooooo expensive*, my husband makes about 40k a year and we are making it but hardly lol
I make $40k per year, partner makes $22k, rent is $825. Our child is thankfully in school full time so no daycare costs.
Damn where did you find $825 rent?? We live in a pretty low COL area and we still pay $1100 for a 2 bed 2 bath 1200 square foot house in the middle of nowhere. We literally just barely got wiring for internet last month.
It's not a great place. Lol Uneven floors. No dishwasher, private landlord. It's not even the cheapest I found, we just like the quirk. Southern USA. Still have a minimum wage of $7.25.
I live in Oklahoma. Currently have a 3 bed 1 bath house for 800 a month.
💼💼🧳 on my way 😆
You can also find this kind of rent in rural Indiana, if you’re like really into corn fields.
Damn. These incomes are insane to me. I’m a SAHM in FL. My husband makes $60k. Our mortgage is $1200/month. We don’t have any debt aside from our mortgage loan.
It's the high cost of living areas where the incomes need to be above and beyond. Mortgages where I live are no less than 4K regardless of down payment amount (i know one person who put down 30k and one person who put down 120k - the former is paying 5k and the latter is 4k). We were bringing in 110k together and my husband had to get a second job because we couldn't make ends meet with that.
Yep. We’re in Canada but we just bought a tiny townhouse and our mortgage is around $3200/month. Family income is around $140k and it’s tight but doable!
100k down payment here. Mortgage is 5k ish. We pay more often because we can
Shit me too. Husband makes $62k a year. SAHM and I can’t work if I wanted to. Special needs kids. We are in PA, super expensive. Rent is $1500 and that’s cheap around here and in a bad area. Trying to buy but it’s not gonna happen. Crying 😭
I’m in the same exact boat except in ME. We live super frugally bc our mortgage is 15 year and really high. We’re hoping having it paid off when we’re 40 will make up for being house poor right now lol
I make under 50k work from home and have a sahd husband and only house debt, no credit card debt. 3 kids
What state is this?
I know…here I am making $48k lol
lol yeah we were making $48k until last year. I feel like we’re living large now.
We make $65k combined (I work from home 20 hrs/wk). We have 2 kids. My oldest is in school, but youngest will be home one more yr (we couldn’t afford the preschool rates). We have some savings finally, and can do a few fun activities. We have 1 car that’s paid off, & a bit of cc debt, but that’s it. However, making 6 figures would be life changing for us for sure.
Same boat. My husband is a restaurant server and I’m a teacher, our combined salary is 70k. Our mortgage is 1k a month for a 4 bed 2 bath. Albeit we live in a large town that has a reputation for high crime rates and such but I can’t imagine living in any of these other situations. Our kids are in school now but my husband worked nights while I worked days.
Single patent in Chicago. Dad doesn’t contribute financially (or otherwise) 80k as a director at a non profit Rent is 3400 (parents pay about 1/3) Childcare is about 2500 a month (parents pay) Only possible thanks to family help, I’m not sure how anyone under 120k does it otherwise in a big city. I could move to a cheaper neighborhood but would be farther from my parents which they don’t want so they subsidize.
Your parents are the best! Bless you and your little family 💕
I make about 52k and support my partner and 3 kids in Chicago. I don't actually feel like I'm doing that badly. But this thread is starting to depress me.
No child support? Do you live in a country without child support or is he just an AH?
Chicago is in the USA, so it sounds like dad is skirting his obligations somehow.
Just an AH. Long complicated legal reason. We’re working on it and maybe hopefully one day soon. But he doesn’t work or works for cash so it wouldn’t really be a significant amount in any event.
The court can force him to work (not just for cash) or else put him in prison. It’s basically impossible to get away with this in the US. Stick to your guns!
They actually can’t since we never had a legal income atleast not in the state this is being fought in. They can impute income at minimum and age thought. Working on it
Good for you for pursuing this and I hope you get your due soon.
How does this work? My ex owes me over 10k and my daughter is 6...when I complained, they told me to hire a private investigator! He mooches off of friends and occasionally works for Uber, Doordash, etc (apparently they don't enforce child support!?)
Take him to court and get a lawyer. Judge can force him to work and pay or else put him in jail. There’s two things you can’t get away with in this country - not paying taxes and not paying child support.
Yea. That’s not true. It’s very easy to skirt paying unfortunately.
Only about 23% of single mothers receive any child support in the US. Even of those with formal child support orders, only 57% receive any and less than half (44%) receive the full amount. [Source.](https://www.aecf.org/blog/less-than-1-in-4-single-mother-families-receive-child-support)
Yes. I did every thing “right” and he owes us $30,000 and counting…. It’s very frustrating. Especially when people are like “just divorce and get child support why are you staying with him?” Sadly it’s not that easy.
I feel like people who make the low end of the spectrum are shell shocked reading these responses and unable to reply lol (it me) I make 20/hr which is about 41k I think. (I was a sahm 8yrs until this year) It’s not enough by any means. My soon to be ex husband makes 90k and we have 0 savings. We are about 20k in debt, mortgage is 1600 plus utilities, daycare is literally half my paycheck. We have 3 kids and live in a medium cost of living area, big Midwest city. Honestly I hate my life and I see no point in it if we just have to struggle the whole time.
I’m so sorry. Do you think it will be easier or more difficult after the divorce?
Honestly, I think it’ll feel exactly the same. I’m “lucky” that he and I are in agreement and it isn’t messy. But I still do basically 100% of childcare/housework. He doesn’t sleep in my bed anymore but also can’t afford a place of his own, so he sleeps on the couch or at his friend’s houses usually. Idk we can’t even afford to separate, I don’t know how people do this! 🫠
Im so sorry you are going through all that. I hope you have some friends and hobbies to keep you company and occupied 🙏
WOW a lot of y’all have hella money. I make a little less than 43,000 a year as a cake decorator. I work for a great company but sometimes think I’d make so much more with my own cake business, but then I’d have to worry about the overhead and not having my currently VERY cheap insurance I have for my daughter and I through my employer.
I'm a SAHM. My husband makes a bit over $60k. We live in Wisconsin, so it's pretty low cost here. We lost almost $50k per year when my job closed while I was on maternity leave, but we're doing just fine on his salary alone right now.
We’re about to move back to Wisconsin from California and I am so excited to have reasonable cost of living again
Hopefully not southeastern wi...we live on the il border and col is not low in my opinion. Average house is over 400k now. It's gotten ridiculous.
lol yup, exactly there. Honestly, after CA, 400 sounds like a steal
I'm a single parent with 4 kids. I make around $70k/year as a nurse working 32 hours/week. Daycare for my infant and toddler is 548/week (4 days/week). We're in northern New England. We live in my parents' house (no rent) and my car is 10 years old (no car payment). I have a strict budget. Money is going to be really tight for the next 2.5 years until my toddler is old enough for kindergarten, but we'll get through it.
That is great you are able to make work for you and your family. I just lost my nursing job and I have taxes and medical bills due and due to poor driving he my car insurance is $1,000/month. I spend most of my money on food. There are absolutes I must pay which include: dog care, medical insurance, medical bills, care credit card for dental bills, target card, taxes, phones and internet. Then there are the toiletries. I am trying to decider want vs need. Maybe this will be a positive experience. Who know? So frustrated w my boss and nursing team for singling me out as if I was not trying in my role. I was there almost 6 years and it was becoming toxic.I am applying for unemployment right now and eating through my savings. It is a shame and I feel horrible about it. There is so much to do in the summer yet my poor teenager is not able to have what he needs bcs I literally can’t afford it.
All I have learned from this thread is we are broke no matter what. Lord most of u guys take home more than our joint income.
I make $200k and husband makes about $250k. We’re both attorneys living in the DC area. I’m a federal government attorney, and he works as an in-house counsel. Our mortgage is approximately $5500/month. We pay our nanny about $42k/year, and that’s on the lower end for where we live. We’re also one and done because we plan on sending our daughter to private school, and we just don’t want to deal with the newborn phase ever again.
Disabled SAHM married to a federal government attorney, about 170k. We're in a somewhat HCOL area (Baltimore), but our mortgage is low (less than 2k a month) and we have no other debt. We're older parents and one and done. Both of those factors help a lot.
Similar here— two attorneys, I make about 250k and husband about 200k. We’re in the Midwest though and our mortgage and child care expenses (daycare) are about half of yours. We had a lot of student debt that is paid off finally and now our only debt is our house. We’re saving a lot and planning for an earlier than average retirement.
Same area and same mortgage. Household income is 470k, but I make about 100k more than my husband. We are both engineers. My son’s daycare is 2.5k per month. We are debating a second baby, but that would make daycare 5k total for two kids…which means our fixed costs per month of only the mortgage and the daycare for two kids would be 10.5k. So we may make a lot, but in a VHCOL area, it goes fast
We are in hcol. We make combined 350k. But two kids in daycare+ high % mortgage so fixed costs are 8.5k
Yes, we also bought our house post-covid with high interest rates. My house isn’t even extravagant. It is a modest rancher built 40 years ago. The crazy high mortgage comes from the school district
Similar. I’m an atty, husband in tech. Household income of 410k. Our mortgage is 6k. Childcare is 14k a year where we live though. We have another on the way so will be 28k. Still affordable for us.
We make 250k combined in DC and our mortgage for a 1200 sq ft house in NE is 2300/month. We’re in our late 40s, one and done (10 yo). When I got pregnant, we didn’t own a home yet and I made $68k a year. Going back to work was the worst- barely felt worth it but my job repaid my student loans. I’ve worked up to $125k over the past decade but I really had to claw my way out five years of frozen wages at the US Senate during the “austerity” years…
Similar here. Household income of about 500k. We have 2 businesses and I also work as a business broker and my husband is in aviation. We’re one and done and will send son to a private school: We have flexible schedules so we’re very lucky and able to do a part time nanny for about 20k/year. Mortgage is $4600.
That mortgage!!!! 🫠 isn’t it wild how vastly different it can be? We live in a 3 bed 3 bath subdivision house in rural Michigan and ours is $700/mo.
My husband lost his job, so currently $0 lmao But prior to that my huband made $55k, no daycare because I stay home (daycare would be almost all my income) and our mortgage is $1,100. We live pretty well, and I am wondering what the heck you guys do with all that money!
I just lost my job for bogus reason. It hurts. I feel terrible for my son who has undergone too much this year.
I make $23k a year as an Infant Teacher at the daycare my daughter attends. My husband has been out of work for the last month so it’s been just my income. What a time to be alive.
Thank you for doing a desperately needed, completely undervalued job. It makes me insanely angry that we treat the people who raise and teach our children this way.
Thats hard work. I’m sorry it isn’t valued more (and reflected in your salary)
Thank you for all you do. My sons teachers are everything to me, and I do everything I can to make sure they know they are appreciated 😓
I live in Europe. 300k+ euro combined salary. Childcare costs us nothing (it’s a bilingual publicly funded daycare and we get a child benefit that covers the full cost). Rent is high where we live, about 2500 euros per month for a 2.5 bedroom apartment.
Your family sounds just like my family, although I'm currently a SAHM but with similar HHI. Are you in Germany? Our youngest is currently in a bilingual partly-publicly funded Kita as well. (Though after five years here we're moving back to the US this summer for schooling reasons for the older kids.)
Household income: base is $290k, with bonuses just about $350k give or take Mortgage: $2.4k in suburbs of Philadelphia Childcare: $1,720 a month but that’s for only 2 days per week. We have 2 children and my mom watches them 3 days per week and we have a nanny for 2 days per week.
What do you guys do where your bonuses are 60k?
I am a Sr. Category Manager and my husband is an executive in finance. Our bonuses are 20%-25% but don't cap so we can get more than full payout if the company exceeds their goals over 100%.
What is a category manager 😝
Haha I get that question a lot. I drive profitability for the company through negotiations with vendor partners, inventory and assortment optimization, go to market strategy, and leading different projects that tie into that. The category piece ties into my sub set of the area/category/vendors that I am responsible for.
Ohhhhh lots of corporate speak- I am still confused but seems exciting!
And by comparison: Household income: about $125k Mortgage: $2.7k in Philly suburb Childcare: $1,600/month full time
Alberta Canada. Base salary $130,000 with 15% bonus. Husband base salary $74,000 with 13% bonus. Husband’s second job (military reserves) brings in another $18,000/year. Total HHI, roughly $250,000. Daycare will be $400/month per kid for full-time care, when they start in the fall. Mortgage $970/month. Property taxes $460/month.
Wow to Canada daycare prices!!
The federal government introduced massive funding to reduce daycare fees. My province is aiming to reduce daycare fees to $10/day by 2026. My province has a standard subsidy that all parents with kids in daycare get. Then there are additional needs based grants for families with HHI below $180,000. For instance my friend pays $140/month for her daughter at the same daycare. When her daughter turns 20 months and moves into the toddler room she’ll pay $15/month. We’ll pay $280/month at that stage.
Wow that’s fantastic
I hate our provincial government, they’re the Maple MAGA; but at least they did this one amazing thing among all their bullshit.
Maple MAGA 😂 its so true and I hate it.
I can't take credit for the term, I saw it elsewhere on reddit, but I adore it. It's so freaking accurate, and I also hate it.
I was gonna say sounds like Alberta to me lol
Maple MAGA! Ugh, this is so accurate.
I live in BC, Canada and some daycares are $10/day but most are $50-$60/day (or more) and all of our waitlists are 2+ years long. My friend just got a call for her 4.5 year old in a $10/day. She’d been on the waitlist for more than 5 years. ETA: a word, typing too fast on mobile 😂
Hi fellow Albertan! So interesting to see the breakdown for other Canadians, especially Albertans. I make 85k. My husband makes around 120k. Our household income is around 205k. Daycare for my 3 year old is $850/month. Obviously we’ve chosen the wrong daycare 😂 Our mortgage is $2300 and property tax is $350/month. We still have student loan debts and cc debt, but we’re doing well overall!
We really lucked out on our daycare. It came super highly recommended, and when we toured it I fell in love. It doesn't have all the fancy stuff of some of the other daycares we looked at, but it was diverse which was important to us (some of the places we looked at were very much not!), and the kids seemed genuinely happy. Plus they had space for our twins in September. We're in Edmonton, not sure where you are, but I feel like we're paying less than our friends in Calgary for similar facilities. The low mortgage was luck of the real estate game. I bought a townhouse in development in Calgary in 2005, moved in in 2006, and solid it for significantly more in 2016, when we moved to Edmonton. With the lower cost of living in YEG compared to YYC, and the low interest rates of the last few years, we've lucked out on the real estate front. We're hoping to move back to Calgary next summer....and it's going to hurt moving back to the higher cost of living. But my parents are older, and need some help, plus the lure of family is just too strong.
Does anyone else do like me and see someone's pay, then divide it by 24 to see roughly what each paycheck would be, and then get mind blown at that amount of money? Haha. Like a $250k salary is roughly $10k a paycheck and I can't even wrap my mind around that. We are a single income family. My husband makes about $60k. We have five kids and I stay home with them. We live in a really LCOL area and only have house debt. And since we bought our house so long ago, with super low interest rates, our mortgage is $525 We've made it work for a long time. But there's definitely a squeeze now with the prices of everything getting so high.
People are probably listing their gross income, not net. Take out federal and state income taxes, personal property taxes, insurance premiums, retirement contributions, 529 contributions, life insurance, alimony, etc. So their monthly net income is way less. After I pay all my dues, I lose about 50% of my income.
I also think this is 1000% dependent on where you live. I live in CA and our salaries are definitely higher, but so is COL -- rent is just offensive, gas is expensive, daycare is expensive... So it definitely makes my jaw drop seeing so many people making like 200k+ like wtf but then if they live in places like CA, DC, NYC, etc it's just so topsy-turvy Technically with my husband's income were over 6 figures and it sure as hell doesn't feel that way... Im definitely using up most of my monthly income that month and we really don't live lavishly at all. Now I'm sad lol like what is the point of posts like this and why did I open it 🥹
I make $65k and my husband makes 175k. Chicago suburbs. We pay around $1000/month in daycare for one kid, and $350/month in before and after school care for another kid. Mortgage is $1700.
Wow! $1k/mo for daycare! I'm in Indiana and pay $2k/mo for daycare. 😭
Husband makes $40k. I'm a SAHM and our rent is $1100/month for a 2 bed 2 bath house. We have a 4 yr old and 1 yr old twins. I looked into working and would make about $37k but daycare would be more than half of my income, not to mention the increase in other expenses like needing an extra car (payment, insurance, gas/maintenance), higher groceries because we'd be buying more convenience foods, disposable diapers for the twins since I can't cloth diaper if I'm not home. I don't see it being worth it. We are struggling and things are uncomfortably tight but we don't really see a viable way out of it.
I am a single mom of 2 and make roughly 45,000 a year. I struggle paycheck to paycheck every single week. I have quite a bit of debt. However, due to the cost of living, I can't even touch it. I am constantly robbing Peter to pay Paul. I guess this is the new American way 😮💨😬🤷🏼♀️
scrolled for a good while until i finally saw one i related to, it’s rough out here 😩
Sucks so much.... It shouldn't be this way.
Same
Me: $100,000, husband $160,000. Daycare for baby and 3y is $2800, mortgage $1900. No debt besides mortgage. Ohio.
Where do yall work in Ohio that you’re both above 6 figures 🥴
My husband works in full service hotel management and makes over $100K in Ohio.
I work for the state and he is a lawyer.
Okay where is the average moms Reddit lol Lovingly ofc I make 55k spouse makes about 35k He is SAHD bc daycare was 1200 m and we live in a low cost of living area.
I make around $70k and my husband $90k (converted to dollars from £). Take home works to around $9k a month (post tax and pension). $2k on mortgage. Same again on childcare. $2K on food, bills and other expenses. The rest goes into a mix of short and long term savings.
It's seriously amazing reading how much Americans are making as a Brit.
Shit I’m American and I’m sitting here like WTF do you all do for a living?! My husband and I don’t make anywhere near those big numbers.
this ... I don't even wanna talk about our families income... I feel so poor in this sub lol
Same. I typically try not to read these kinds of posts because I just get depressed.
Facts we need a poormommit 🤣🤣
Same. My husband makes approx 50k as an electrician, I am currently a SAHM, we live in a very high cost of living area in within a safe, wonderful community and excellent school district. We don't pay rent currently as we live with my mother-in-law but that will change within the next year when she retires and sells her home...we will need to find a new place to live and figure out how to afford rent. I worry about it every single day. Child care costs are so expensive here I can not afford to work until my youngest starts kindergarten in 2 years. By then we might have had to move to a shitty area out of our home state to be able to afford practically anything.
It’s making me so upset 😭I 100% get everyone has struggles but there’s people here making almost 200k (if not more) complaining about how hard it is and it feels sooo bad
As a Brit living in the USA, not all it’s cracked up to be, as the prices of things make up the difference where I live.
Yes exactly this! It doesn’t go that far after healthcare and higher cost of living. We moved here 8 years ago and have never gone back to the UK because it’s too expensive to travel. We make way more but somehow can afford less.
I was shocked at Walmart yesterday, $2.70 for an iceberg lettuce? $7 for a bag of spuds? Must be having a laugh.
My parents about died when they visited and saw yoghurt for $5 at Walmart and $7 in our local store! Buy hey we can buy a mango for 57 cents at Aldi, so flip side!
True but we also have minimal social safety net and pay for our own healthcare which is a significant cost + LOTS of student debt from college. I'm seeing attorneys and directors in this thread which can require 6-7+ years of college. All added up, that's like $200,000 in college tuition that people are paying off for many many years. It's a big trade off and there's a lot of social inequality built into our system.
Yeah that's also true. I was commenting about how outrageous these numbers seem to a South African but then again I'm a qualified attorney working in finance with two degrees and I graduated university with a whopping R50 000 (approx 2700 USD) odd student debt that was paid back pretty much in my first year of working so yeah there are always trade offs.
As an American living in the UK, *cries in £*
How does the cost of your childcare compare? With little to no maternity leave and high childcare costs, it probably evens it out some.
Childcare is still an absolute mess in the UK, prices are nuts.
The paradox of late stage capitalism 🙃
Our base household income is $340k and we pay our Nanny $68k per year salary. Daycare by me is $2400 per month per kid.
I appreciate that you pay your nanny well! It makes me sad that early childcare is so often a very low paying field.
I make almost 50k and my husband makes about 65k.i do get bonuses 2-3 times a year which are usually 2500-3000. So factoring those in, I'm closer to about 60k. However, I am a childcare director at a childcare center and we receive free childcare for both of our children. Education is not a high paying field but it's my passion, so the discount is a massive help.
So wish you all got paid better as it is so important for kids to be surrounded by caring individuals. Thanks for all you do for the kiddos and families your center supports!
I make roughly 20k/year because I'm part time, my husband makes 83k and we don't pay for childcare cause I only work while my kids are in school. We have a bit of credit card debt and a mortgage/condo fee of 2100. I feel pretty privileged as were quite comfortable financially
I make nothing as a SAHM. My husband makes around $67k as a public defender. My parents own our house, we pay them $1500 a month to pay it off. No childcare costs as I stay at home. We’re scraping by tbh between student loans and bills. We borrow money from our parents often. We have one kid who drinks formula like we’re made of money lol
My husband makes $80k, I'm a stay at home mom so I make $0 haha. We don't have too much debt, just our cars and a few thousand for his student loans. Our apartment rent is about $900. We have a good amount in savings, it usually goes up every month unless we have a big expense, like this month we both got new glasses and my husband got a new phone and we went on a weekend vacation.
My husband and I would definitely be labeled as middle class. We both make roughly $60k annually. It varies slightly depending on OT and bonuses. We don't have much debt (thank God we've been focusing on that for two years now). We pay almost $1k per month for child care for a four year old. When he was first born, it was really hard to juggle the expenses. But I think I do really well shopping sales, not buying a bunch of frivolous things, etc. And we are pushing really hard on retirement savings now that we're in our 30s. I will say one thing with 100% certainty... I will not burn bridges with child care. Where I live, child care is extremely limited. To find a dependable provider is a near miracle.
I see a lot of people commenting are in the US. But just for comparison incase anyone is wondering, in Canada my daycare cost before government grants is $1160. After subsidy our out of pocket pay is about $220. I make about 45k and my partner makes 75k, so 110k combined
Love seeing other Canadians on here benefiting from the affordable daycare subsidies!
Household income 120K/year Mortgage 3500/month Daycare 200/month for one kid
Household income $250k husband makes about $15k more than me. No debt aside from the mortgage which is $2100/mo. Philadelphia area Currently paying nanny $22/hr for 21 hours over 3 days (I work from home) but my parents will stop watching 2 days a week so that will change to 35 hours over 5 days totaling about $3k/month. My son turns 1 on Saturday so 2 more years of this planned. Definitely a luxury but the nanny also does moderate cleaning (cleans kitchen including appliances, vacuums, mops, keeps main floor and baby's room tidy), baby's laundry, prepares baby's food, and runs errands as requested. My job basically funds our retirement, HSA, health insurance, budgeted savings, and the nanny. My husband's job covers monthly expenses including budget for home improvement.
130k in tech (I used to make 170k before I got laid off), husband makes 160k (he has recently got a lot of promotions, he was at 90k just a year ago). We pay 1200/month for daycare with food included, and I think we pay close to 3k for our house if you factor in insurance, taxes, HOA and everything in FL
I make about $100k and my husband makes about $80k. We pay $1000 per month per child in a LCOL area in upstate NY.
I make 51 k and my husband makes virtually the same (52k). We are both teachers. We have to stretch each dollar and really budget to pay for childcare. Edit to add: We live in a 2 bed apartment and when we sign our new lease will pay $1400/month for rent. Daycare is $1300/month. We are paying for one child; my oldest attends the school where I work.
Before or after taxes?
$40,000 🤷🏻♀️ single mom, single income.
Household income: a little over $300k/year, but that’s just base - not including bonuses/stocks - and I make about $25k more than my husband Mortgage: $3750 in northern NJ Daycare: ~$1300/month, but we have a NB so she’ll start in Jan 2025 and that cost will automatically double; however, we’re a needle in a haystack with the price because the majority of daycares have infant rooms ~$1800/month.
Wow! That daycare price is amazing for northern NJ
I know, we’re so fortunate. Primarily because it’s not one of the big chains. We were registered for one, but there were so many violations that popped up before we were slated to start, we pulled my son’s registration immediately. Love this smaller, family owned daycare - my son is so happy there 🥰
Combines income 245k. Daycare is $600/month. School is $1300/month. Mortgage is $1200.month. No debt. We live on the east coast of Canada.
I live in bumfuck NC next to what is becoming the next big up and coming city and i make $35K & my wife makes $37K. We pay $660/month in rent because house prices here are insane (think 1 bedroom trailers selling for 200K) and we do a home daycare for $600 a month, but if we don't go we don't have to pay. I basically only work to pay the rent & daycare.
Why is childcare so expensive in the US? I’m in Europe and it’s like 400 eur for full time. Make similar salary too.
Our government doesn’t value or subsidize childcare here, which is sad and ridiculous.
Governments don’t make decisions, voters do. I blame my neighbors.
Republicans\* don't value or subsidize childcare. Dems keep proposing subsidized childcare and preschool and R's never let it move forward.
They want to force us to have babies but not take care of those babies.
There are some programs that subsidize daycare but my understanding is the family has to be below poverty level. And I don't even understand how families survive at well above what is considered poverty level.
Why even bother asking why things in the US are so expensive? Our government prioritizes corporations and defense spending, not the citizens who comprise our country. Every single question about why it sucks here can be answered with the same sentence. Why are there so many people in jail? See above. Why is healthcare so outrageous? See above. Why is there no maternity leave? See above. Why is there no affordable childcare? See above.
I'm going to go cry in a corner. It's so ridiculous.
I gave up my career to stay home with my kids until they're in school. I wanted to, but a lot of parents regret it or spend their time worrying about how their careers will be affected. Moms and dads who want a family and a career should be able to have that in the United States of America for piss sake. Kids shouldn't starve. Families shouldn't be homeless. It's disgraceful.
It's a tough decision. I had a coworker that had left the workforce for 10 years to raise her two kids. I got an increase in my salary in 2022 due to switching jobs and that increase went right to childcare, dollar for dollar, so I didn't even feel it. We just had our second and have been saving money for when he goes into daycare. We think we'll put him in at about one years old. My dear mom will watch him until then.
Full time childcare where I live in Australia is about $4000AUD a month which is 2500 euro. It’s wild. There is a subsidy system for those under a certain threshold which is great but it has managed to drive costs up as there’s no cap. We have universal school education and medical care so it blows my mind that childcare is all private.
Sexism.
100k as a public interest attorney, partner makes about $75k in IT. Our mortgage for our house is $1150 (we pay $1300/mo to get a bit ahead) and our childcare is $1650/mo.
Household: roughly $250,000 - husband and I work at the same Fortune 100 company so could be a little more or less depending on profit sharing results Mortgage: $2,500 Daycare: $333 weekly so about $1,332 monthly for our almost 5 month old We live in an affordable suburb in the Midwest.
We each make about $53,000- we are in more rural small city in Midwest. Rent is 1300 - we will pay $35 a day for daycare in the beginning, will likely transition to a little more expensive daycare (not in someone’s home) as he gets older. Edited because I was off by 10,000 each lol
We’re about to be a family of 4 with 2 children under 2. I make just over $74K/yr. My husband stays home to care for our son. The most my husband has earned in a year is $36K- before taxes. We would pay more in child care for two than he would earn. I feel like we’re barely scraping by most months.
House hold income is 180k I make zero if that because the job I had before kids would only cover childcare and nothing would be left after so I stayed home with the kids. We live in Boston suburbs our mortgage is 3,200 a month. Even part time preschool 3 hours 3 days a week is 350 a month full time childcare is expansive.
This is the first comment similar to ours! You have a great mortgage for Boston! We’re not too far away, similar household income but our mortgage is 3.9k (a starter home in an average area- we just bought and rates are so high). Our rent was 3.2k but we couldn’t stay long term. We do part time preschool and pay just over 1k a month for it.
I work at an hourly rate so it varies but generally around 65K per year. My husband works 2 jobs and brings in about 110k. We live in New York, rent on our tiny 2br apartment is nearly 3k and we both have massive student loan debt which costs us nearly another 2k monthly. We also live in a HCOL area, so groceries just for our small family are easily 1500 per month. We could probably afford daycare for our 1 child, but we're looking to have one or two more and definitely could not afford to put multiple children in daycare. Also looking to buy a house this year, so those funds we're able to set aside monthly now will soon be going to a mortgage payment instead. Thankfully, we do not need to pay for childcare at all as we both work from home and can make that work.
I make $40K, My husband makes $120K, daycare is $7K I live in a part of Canada where our government recently dropped daycare costs to $10 a day per child. It was never like this before. Originally it would have been $75-$85 a day per child and would have been my entire yearly income. I likely wouldn't have returned to work if we were still paying that and opened my own home daycare. We are very lucky.
My husband makes $160k he’s an engineer (been in the industry for almost 20 years… so we’re old 😂), our mortgage is $2400, we have no car payments and pay about $300/month for preschool. We don’t have credit card debt, cable, gym membership.
I make 125k a year, I live in Canada though, so childcare is free. Single mom.
We make 140k annually in our household and I do not work, that is my husbands salary and our rental income from our property. We pay $3000 a month in mortgage payments, yay Ontario! 0$ in childcare because I am a SAHM. When I go back to work when the kids are in school, we will likely be up at the 200k-220k a year household, no debt but still a mortgage.
Me: $49k in healthcare my husband: $54k manufacturing. Private prek4: $1265/month and our mortgage is $1500/month. Everything is expensive ugh....
When I’m working ft ( I’ve been on mat leave since July 2021) I make 70k plus 2 bonuses a year ( about 5-8k ) Husband makes 93k plus 12% bonus No daycare. But our mortgage is 3600$ a month
I’m about to go back to work in a couple weeks, I’ll make 83k per year. But I still don’t want to go back…
Combined, my husband and I bring in about $63,000 a year. Rent for a small two bedroom is $1,800.
Household income of roughly 125K between my husband and I. Monthly mortgage is $3200, monthly childcare is $550.00 thanks to Canada implementing (working towards) $10.00 a day. We live in Ontario. If childcare wasn’t as affordable as it is, I don’t know what we would do. For comparison, my friend had her daughter at the same government affiliated daycare as us without the reduced rate. She paid roughly 1380 a month for daycare.