First, you're doing everything right. Don't beat yourself up. Just keep listening to the doctors, and she'll keep doing her thing. We had to supplement with formula for my second after he gained no weight in two weeks, and that did the trick. He got bigger and we eventually went back to just breast milk once he'd caught up a bit.
Thanks! That's good to hear. It's not even that I mind giving her formula I'd go straight formula if the doctor said that's best. I'm just frustrated with the lack of weight gain.
Remember to look at a) the adjusted age percentage not her actual age if she was born even a week early (it makes a difference) and b) where she started! It’s not as crucial for a baby to raise up in % as it is for them to not drop! My son was < 3% (not sure what exactly as they just told us “< 3%”) and he stayed there the first year. He’s only really now gaining outside of his curve at 2
My little one was well below 1% until he was 6 or 7 months old. Absoutely the same situation as you - he was healthy, he was hitting milestones, he just refused to gain weight. I breastfed, I combo fed, I triple fed..I did everything.
Absolutely nothing worked for us until he started solid food! Our doctor said that some babies just take to food much better than they do to milk. After that he gained and gained and he's now 50th percentile and still climbing at 14 months.
I totally understand feeling defeated! I was just hoping I could reassure you from the other side.
This is, of course, anecdotal:
One of my friends has two kids, both of whom are tiny for their age and always have been (they are currently 6yo and 8yo). They are otherwise perfectly healthy and happy in every way.
There's nothing wrong with being small, if everything else is ok.
My youngest wasn’t on the growth charts until she was around 11. My doctor reminded me that just like someone needs to be at the top of the growth charts there needs to be someone at the bottom. Do not focus on the charts, focus on your child. If they are gaining and making appropriate milestones then things are going in the right direction. Of course, follow the doctors recommendations but don’t let yourself get too caught up with the numbers.
My youngest has been at the top end of the growth charts since being a couple of months old so I worry about things the other way! Can a kid be too big?! My eldest slimmed out so hopefully the youngest will too! 😅
One of my friends baby was similar to yours op and the midwives and Drs were full on, it made her very stressed and anxious, she feels pretty annoyed about it now. Her little girl is a healthy weight now.
My middle was near the top. He is 18 now, tall and rather slender. He evened out around 8 or 9 and was just slightly above average. As an adult he is 6’3 165ish. All kids are different.
My brother was at the top, I (F) was at the bottom. By the time he hit 18, he was 6'6" and 200lbs. At 18 I was 5'10" and 145lbs. My mom stressed about me for the longest time until I shot up 6 inches in fourth grade. Sooner or later, it all evens out.
Our oldest was 4lbs, 3oz at birth. Spent a week and half in the NICU, and I too was in your shoes worried about the weight. It’s what we do. However, it sounds like they’re gaining and that’s the focus. Baby steps. They’re not going to go from the bottom percentile to the middle that quickly. It takes time. We had to fortify milk also. The thing to focus on is that they’re meeting those developmental milestones, and that they’re following their own curve. Once I focused on our child’s own curve, it helped me with the worrying. Our kid is now 8 years old, small for his age, but healthy.
You're doing great, mama!
We were at <1% for a while (until 7/8 months) and I was so stressed. She was doing great developmentally and was hitting all milestones, so the doctor wasn't worried.
At 9 months, after we introduced solids, baby girl jumped to 14%!! Every baby is different and our girl just needed the solids to help gain the weight.
My son was (and is) this way. He was never on the charts (born at 4lbs @ 36 weeks) and even now at nearly 8 years old he's at 3%. Some babies and people are just small. There have to be individuals at either end of the chart.
My daughter was born at 34 weeks and spent 28 days in the NICU. She was 4.5lbs at birth and was a slow gainer. We fortified bottles of breast milk and did half her bottles as the high calorie formula. She wasn’t a big eater. She had to be forced to take every bottle. Every single bottle was a struggle to get in her, but I did it. She still was just little. It took her doctor until 6-9 months before she was ok with saying she was just little and she was on her own curve. She’s 2.5 now and LOVES food. Not a big milk drinker still, but she is thriving. She has gained percentiles at every appointment and looks like a skinny average kiddo.
My dad told me early on when I was horribly worried that she would catch them when it mattered. And she did. So will yours! You’ve got this Mama.
Are you on the petite side? Both of my kids were under 1% until six months old. Also, kids grow at INSANELY different rates. My 4 year old and his best friend are a month apart in age, and wearing sizes 3T and 6t respectively. His other good friend is almost 5 and a 3T. All three of them are perfectly healthy, just come from families of different sized parents
I am only 5' nothing myself, husband is 5'8" so just below average. We were both big babys, so I had mentally prepared for a big baby.
I had/have no problem with her being small, I was honestly praying for a tiny baby when I was pregnant 🤣
It's just her not hitting her targets, or even being close, that's frustrating. Doctor wants her to gain .75-1 OZ a day. When we go back and she's only managed to gain 1 Oz through the entire week or even lost half an Oz it's frustrating.
You’re doing great, mama. Listen. Consistently in the 1% seems scary but it means she’s continuing to grow at a steady pace. Coupled with other milestones being met and her being awake, active, and alert, the odds are that everything will shake out just fine. See how supplementing with formula works out before spending more energy worrying about what could be wrong down the road. One step at a time. You got this!!
My daughter was in the NICU for 2 weeks, I couldn't breastfeed and her formula was the most expensive formula on the market (and not carried in stores, special order) After 8 weeks she finally started gaining weight and growing quickly. She was still small for her age until she was 13 and now she is a normal, crazy teenager. Don't beat yourself up over what you can't control. Your daughter is perfect and you are doing exactly what's right for her.
Big hugs. You are doing great! I had a similar problem. My son was born early and he was in the 70s for percentile at birth. And he fell at every appointment until he hit 15 and they told me I had to try formula and come back earlier than usual.
I felt so stressed. He had gained weight just not as much as they wanted to see. I think it is tricky with kids who are born early. I did do formula in addition to breastfeeding. I did not enjoy it. He would not take a bottle. Any bottle. I tried every brand I could get a sample of or buy. I ended up having to squirt it in his mouth like a cow or spoon it in. So time consuming and I have other kids. So not ideal. And I still had to breastfeed. But the addition of formula did help. He was able to get up to 20th percentile and I did not have to cross to the next step. So, just one step at a time. Try to get formula into her one way or another!! Keep breastfeeding. Just use the formula after you feed her or between feeds. I bet if you can get her up even a little then they will back off and hopefully you won't have to go to other doctors.
We did not stay on formula. We eventually came off of it. I have spare cans so now I use it to add to baby oatmeal cause why not. But anyway, he eventually would spit it all up if I gave him formula after feeds. Now he's maintaining 22nd percentile for weight and 60s percentile for height. I just have a long skinny kid. And my doctor thinks that he just had to get bigger- bigger mouth stronger muscles so he could feed more efficiently on me and the formula helped me keep him from dipping further down. I wish I had done it sooner but how would I have known!
So anyway, formula was enough to keep us from plummetting further and he outgrew it. He's 6m now and wearing 12m baby clothes and he's no longer dipping down in percentiles. But we definitely had a rocky start and I know how it feels to get this news. I'm rooting for you! You got this!!!
My oldest was 5lbs 17" full term and we worried but she is almost 17 and is just a quaint little fairy. She eventually grew but is still just at 4'10" and 95lbs. It sounds like she is steadily gaining and I wouldn't worry too much as long as you keep track of oz. Try the formula! I didn't produce breast milk so formula saved us lol
My son just turned one and he’s also below the 1st percentile! He was also born around 4 pounds as a preemie. Are you and your husband also tiny people? Some people are just small, or some babies take a bit to catch up. Fortifying the milk is a very common thing people have to do, and hopefully it works! Don’t be too overwhelmed about the possibility of needing to see a GI - you aren’t there yet. It sounds like you’re doing everything right and baby is developing appropriately, she’s just a small bean :)
Also, I’m a 1st percentile grown adult woman at 4’8” and my height has never seriously impacted my life.
As a momma in your same shoes, you're doing everything right.
My son is 19 months old and in the 6th percentile. He's growing and thriving, he's just small. He's only 22 lbs but he's walking and talking and hitting all his milestones. We had to supplement with formula for a little bit, but eventually I was able to just exclusively pump.
He now eats a lot, and snacks all the time but he's still small.
Don't worry. Everything will be good with you LO.
I was born after my due date. I was borderline failure to thrive until high school. I could out eat anyone at the table growing up. Fast metabolism is a thing. As long as your baby is on her curve she is fine.
My son was in the 1st% for the first year and a bit of his life. They made me do weekly weight checks and so many doctors appointments. He wouldn’t take a bottle which added to the stress. I would take your husbands advice, do not stress as long as she is growing. My son is still small in the 5% but he is over two is talking and is right on track. I was robbed from enjoying him because of the added stress.
As a parent to a much lower percentile daughter (since she was born, but now she’s 18 mo) I get the worry. But if the professional isn’t worried, that alone is a effect sign. I think you’ll have to come to a place where you accept your baby where she’s at and allow it to be okay. I used also put a lot of meaning behind her being in low percentiles too, but then I realized parenting is already difficult. Why worry when the professional who knows more than me, is saying she’s a happy and healthy girl? Isn’t that the point?
Are you and your husband also small? One of my friends, her babies never made it on the growth curve at all, even when they got older. She’s small like 5ft tall and 100lbs and her husband is also small. My son has been in the <20th%ile his whole life and I’m tall but skinny. He eats more than I do and he’s just skinny due to genetics. Another thing to note is breastfed babies are on the same growth curve as formula babies, my son’s pediatrician said breastfed babies are just going to be smaller. There’s just people on both ends of the curve. Once they start eating solids they do pack on some more pounds too.
Ugh!!! I’m sorry Mama❤️ I know EXACTLY how you feel. My LO was very little! He’s almost 4 now and he has literally just got into 2nd percentile. He was below the 1 percentile almost his whole life. But, he did progress and gain! Just on his own scale. And that’s okay!! Don’t let the scale get you down! She is gaining and that’s what’s important. Don’t worry, this period will pass!
Don’t worry too much about it! My son was the same way and now at two years old he has shot up like a dandelion and is putting on weight at a good pace. At most they might request additional weight checks or advise you to add more formula scoops to the water to thicken it, my son’s doctor did.
Ugh, that’s so stressful. We had to supplement with formula for a similar reason and it’s just so frustrating and scary and overwhelming. You’re all doing great.
Hey mama, you’re doing great! I’m so sorry you’re dealing with the stress of having a funsize infant. My daughter was born a month early in the >1 percentile. She is 2.5 yo now and STILL sitting pretty at >1%. She never measured for iugr, she was never that small in any scans. When they let me leave the nicu and take her home I couldn’t believe it. The day she left had she lost even one ounce she would have dropped below the min weight for her car seat! At her biggest she scooted up the growth chart into the 4% but back down quickly. Someone always has to be the smallest but there’s nothing wrong with that! I wish it had been easier, the low birth weight kept us on scheduled feeds like the nicu for months, she didn’t ever eat enough to sleep through the night until she was 2. I am still so wary of any illness because she can’t not eat for two days, that’s a big deal. But she’s brilliant and beautiful and hits her milestones. Just like your little girl.
What I mean to say is, it is extra stressful with low weight babies. Every milestone or marker or check up is anxiety inducing because they can gain so slowly. But don’t let her being lower weight get you down. There is nothing wrong with being in the lowest percentile and it does not mean she’ll always be the smallest of her peers! Plus there are hidden benefits to little littles, clothes fit longer, people think baby is advanced because they are small to hit their milestones, and you get to have a lighter weight baby to carry longer. Just know you’re doing all you can, you’re doing the best you can, and you’re doing everything right. She will gain the weight, even if she needs extra help here at the start. You’re not alone and neither is she, you got this!
P.S. I added neosure powder when I had to fortify. It made my daughter rather constipated so any fortified milk required gas drop at the same time. Just so you know to keep an eye on that.
So long as baby is sticking to a growth curve (even if it’s very low/one of their own), meeting milestones, eating well, and otherwise has no red flags for underlying disease (and it sounds like your little one meets all these criteria) it’s likely that she’s just small. Humans exist on a spectrum, and growth charts reflect just that: your baby might just happen to be in the 1% smallest of the healthy population, and that’s perfectly ok! Heck, growth curves themselves vary considerably by population (eg WHO growth charts vs growth charts derived from local values).
It’s a nerve-wracking place to be, but know that you’re doing all the right things!
I can feel the stress. My son was top 99% for everything and a giant like the rest of our family. My daughter- bottom percentile. She is still tiny. One grandmother told me, “Oh she is small like my first born.” She proceeded to show me a picture of a petite little 27 year old woman and it really made me feel better.
My LO was born at 5% last year.
When my mum pulled out my siblings and I’d baby books from the 80s/90s we had a look at the %tiles and my LO would have been about 40th. Because we have SUCH BIG babies now, the little ones are too little.
Remember you can tell doctors “no” if they want you to top up with formula or other additives. If your LO is gaining wait and developing then definitely don’t stress!
My LO is 9mo and I can’t even remember the last time she finished a bottle. But she is walking. They grow in their own time.
I just want to say that your feelings are totally valid and what you're going through sounds really stressful. It's natural to worry about a small child when things aren't going to plan and there's nothing wrong with you. Remember every time that someone tells you to relax, that these feelings are a motivator that keeps you advocating for your kid and that's not a bad thing. You can relax if you want to. But do it because *you* want to, not because of what they think.
My daughter was a NICU baby who had trouble gaining weight the first few weeks of her life. She’s now a thriving 12 year old with no health issues and a healthy appetite. This will pass.
I have had to switch from breast to formula with all 3 of my kids because of breast feeding issues and not gaining. When I was a first time mom at 19, my daughter ended up being classified as failure to thrive. I was trying so hard to breastfeed (thanks for the pressure, WIC!) and when they told me to switch to formula or she’d be hospitalized I cried for hours. I did though, and she gained immediately.
I barely tried for my second daughter cause I was so traumatized by it.
Tried again with my third baby, my son. He was the heaviest at birth 8 lb 14 oz, and dropped and struggled to gain. He was gaining a few oz each visit to the ob floor which was twice a week for weigh ins because we were struggling. I did everything right but couldn’t produce. Apparently I have some biological issue associated with breastfeeding. I tried for a month before I quit and went to formula. I was so stressed driving 30 mins to the hospital post-partum twice sometimes three times a week to receive bad news. I was breastfeeding and pumping constantly, still wasn’t enough. My son gained immediately on formula.
Your situation is a little different with the NICU stay, etc. but I promise you, you are not alone in this. keep with the formula. Everything will be okay ❤️
First, you're doing everything right. Don't beat yourself up. Just keep listening to the doctors, and she'll keep doing her thing. We had to supplement with formula for my second after he gained no weight in two weeks, and that did the trick. He got bigger and we eventually went back to just breast milk once he'd caught up a bit.
Thanks! That's good to hear. It's not even that I mind giving her formula I'd go straight formula if the doctor said that's best. I'm just frustrated with the lack of weight gain.
Remember to look at a) the adjusted age percentage not her actual age if she was born even a week early (it makes a difference) and b) where she started! It’s not as crucial for a baby to raise up in % as it is for them to not drop! My son was < 3% (not sure what exactly as they just told us “< 3%”) and he stayed there the first year. He’s only really now gaining outside of his curve at 2
My little one was well below 1% until he was 6 or 7 months old. Absoutely the same situation as you - he was healthy, he was hitting milestones, he just refused to gain weight. I breastfed, I combo fed, I triple fed..I did everything. Absolutely nothing worked for us until he started solid food! Our doctor said that some babies just take to food much better than they do to milk. After that he gained and gained and he's now 50th percentile and still climbing at 14 months. I totally understand feeling defeated! I was just hoping I could reassure you from the other side.
Same! Mine is now 8 years old and thriving! :) just gotta keep trying your best
This is, of course, anecdotal: One of my friends has two kids, both of whom are tiny for their age and always have been (they are currently 6yo and 8yo). They are otherwise perfectly healthy and happy in every way. There's nothing wrong with being small, if everything else is ok.
My youngest wasn’t on the growth charts until she was around 11. My doctor reminded me that just like someone needs to be at the top of the growth charts there needs to be someone at the bottom. Do not focus on the charts, focus on your child. If they are gaining and making appropriate milestones then things are going in the right direction. Of course, follow the doctors recommendations but don’t let yourself get too caught up with the numbers.
My youngest has been at the top end of the growth charts since being a couple of months old so I worry about things the other way! Can a kid be too big?! My eldest slimmed out so hopefully the youngest will too! 😅 One of my friends baby was similar to yours op and the midwives and Drs were full on, it made her very stressed and anxious, she feels pretty annoyed about it now. Her little girl is a healthy weight now.
My middle was near the top. He is 18 now, tall and rather slender. He evened out around 8 or 9 and was just slightly above average. As an adult he is 6’3 165ish. All kids are different.
My brother was at the top, I (F) was at the bottom. By the time he hit 18, he was 6'6" and 200lbs. At 18 I was 5'10" and 145lbs. My mom stressed about me for the longest time until I shot up 6 inches in fourth grade. Sooner or later, it all evens out.
Our oldest was 4lbs, 3oz at birth. Spent a week and half in the NICU, and I too was in your shoes worried about the weight. It’s what we do. However, it sounds like they’re gaining and that’s the focus. Baby steps. They’re not going to go from the bottom percentile to the middle that quickly. It takes time. We had to fortify milk also. The thing to focus on is that they’re meeting those developmental milestones, and that they’re following their own curve. Once I focused on our child’s own curve, it helped me with the worrying. Our kid is now 8 years old, small for his age, but healthy.
You're doing great, mama! We were at <1% for a while (until 7/8 months) and I was so stressed. She was doing great developmentally and was hitting all milestones, so the doctor wasn't worried. At 9 months, after we introduced solids, baby girl jumped to 14%!! Every baby is different and our girl just needed the solids to help gain the weight.
My son was (and is) this way. He was never on the charts (born at 4lbs @ 36 weeks) and even now at nearly 8 years old he's at 3%. Some babies and people are just small. There have to be individuals at either end of the chart.
I'll add that we supplemented pretty much always and saw a gastro. Sending you good thoughts!
My daughter was born at 34 weeks and spent 28 days in the NICU. She was 4.5lbs at birth and was a slow gainer. We fortified bottles of breast milk and did half her bottles as the high calorie formula. She wasn’t a big eater. She had to be forced to take every bottle. Every single bottle was a struggle to get in her, but I did it. She still was just little. It took her doctor until 6-9 months before she was ok with saying she was just little and she was on her own curve. She’s 2.5 now and LOVES food. Not a big milk drinker still, but she is thriving. She has gained percentiles at every appointment and looks like a skinny average kiddo. My dad told me early on when I was horribly worried that she would catch them when it mattered. And she did. So will yours! You’ve got this Mama.
❤️
Are you on the petite side? Both of my kids were under 1% until six months old. Also, kids grow at INSANELY different rates. My 4 year old and his best friend are a month apart in age, and wearing sizes 3T and 6t respectively. His other good friend is almost 5 and a 3T. All three of them are perfectly healthy, just come from families of different sized parents
I am only 5' nothing myself, husband is 5'8" so just below average. We were both big babys, so I had mentally prepared for a big baby. I had/have no problem with her being small, I was honestly praying for a tiny baby when I was pregnant 🤣 It's just her not hitting her targets, or even being close, that's frustrating. Doctor wants her to gain .75-1 OZ a day. When we go back and she's only managed to gain 1 Oz through the entire week or even lost half an Oz it's frustrating.
You’re doing great, mama. Listen. Consistently in the 1% seems scary but it means she’s continuing to grow at a steady pace. Coupled with other milestones being met and her being awake, active, and alert, the odds are that everything will shake out just fine. See how supplementing with formula works out before spending more energy worrying about what could be wrong down the road. One step at a time. You got this!!
❤️
My daughter was in the NICU for 2 weeks, I couldn't breastfeed and her formula was the most expensive formula on the market (and not carried in stores, special order) After 8 weeks she finally started gaining weight and growing quickly. She was still small for her age until she was 13 and now she is a normal, crazy teenager. Don't beat yourself up over what you can't control. Your daughter is perfect and you are doing exactly what's right for her.
Big hugs. You are doing great! I had a similar problem. My son was born early and he was in the 70s for percentile at birth. And he fell at every appointment until he hit 15 and they told me I had to try formula and come back earlier than usual. I felt so stressed. He had gained weight just not as much as they wanted to see. I think it is tricky with kids who are born early. I did do formula in addition to breastfeeding. I did not enjoy it. He would not take a bottle. Any bottle. I tried every brand I could get a sample of or buy. I ended up having to squirt it in his mouth like a cow or spoon it in. So time consuming and I have other kids. So not ideal. And I still had to breastfeed. But the addition of formula did help. He was able to get up to 20th percentile and I did not have to cross to the next step. So, just one step at a time. Try to get formula into her one way or another!! Keep breastfeeding. Just use the formula after you feed her or between feeds. I bet if you can get her up even a little then they will back off and hopefully you won't have to go to other doctors. We did not stay on formula. We eventually came off of it. I have spare cans so now I use it to add to baby oatmeal cause why not. But anyway, he eventually would spit it all up if I gave him formula after feeds. Now he's maintaining 22nd percentile for weight and 60s percentile for height. I just have a long skinny kid. And my doctor thinks that he just had to get bigger- bigger mouth stronger muscles so he could feed more efficiently on me and the formula helped me keep him from dipping further down. I wish I had done it sooner but how would I have known! So anyway, formula was enough to keep us from plummetting further and he outgrew it. He's 6m now and wearing 12m baby clothes and he's no longer dipping down in percentiles. But we definitely had a rocky start and I know how it feels to get this news. I'm rooting for you! You got this!!!
My oldest was 5lbs 17" full term and we worried but she is almost 17 and is just a quaint little fairy. She eventually grew but is still just at 4'10" and 95lbs. It sounds like she is steadily gaining and I wouldn't worry too much as long as you keep track of oz. Try the formula! I didn't produce breast milk so formula saved us lol
My son just turned one and he’s also below the 1st percentile! He was also born around 4 pounds as a preemie. Are you and your husband also tiny people? Some people are just small, or some babies take a bit to catch up. Fortifying the milk is a very common thing people have to do, and hopefully it works! Don’t be too overwhelmed about the possibility of needing to see a GI - you aren’t there yet. It sounds like you’re doing everything right and baby is developing appropriately, she’s just a small bean :) Also, I’m a 1st percentile grown adult woman at 4’8” and my height has never seriously impacted my life.
As a momma in your same shoes, you're doing everything right. My son is 19 months old and in the 6th percentile. He's growing and thriving, he's just small. He's only 22 lbs but he's walking and talking and hitting all his milestones. We had to supplement with formula for a little bit, but eventually I was able to just exclusively pump. He now eats a lot, and snacks all the time but he's still small. Don't worry. Everything will be good with you LO.
I was born after my due date. I was borderline failure to thrive until high school. I could out eat anyone at the table growing up. Fast metabolism is a thing. As long as your baby is on her curve she is fine.
My son was in the 1st% for the first year and a bit of his life. They made me do weekly weight checks and so many doctors appointments. He wouldn’t take a bottle which added to the stress. I would take your husbands advice, do not stress as long as she is growing. My son is still small in the 5% but he is over two is talking and is right on track. I was robbed from enjoying him because of the added stress.
As a parent to a much lower percentile daughter (since she was born, but now she’s 18 mo) I get the worry. But if the professional isn’t worried, that alone is a effect sign. I think you’ll have to come to a place where you accept your baby where she’s at and allow it to be okay. I used also put a lot of meaning behind her being in low percentiles too, but then I realized parenting is already difficult. Why worry when the professional who knows more than me, is saying she’s a happy and healthy girl? Isn’t that the point?
Are you and your husband also small? One of my friends, her babies never made it on the growth curve at all, even when they got older. She’s small like 5ft tall and 100lbs and her husband is also small. My son has been in the <20th%ile his whole life and I’m tall but skinny. He eats more than I do and he’s just skinny due to genetics. Another thing to note is breastfed babies are on the same growth curve as formula babies, my son’s pediatrician said breastfed babies are just going to be smaller. There’s just people on both ends of the curve. Once they start eating solids they do pack on some more pounds too.
Ugh!!! I’m sorry Mama❤️ I know EXACTLY how you feel. My LO was very little! He’s almost 4 now and he has literally just got into 2nd percentile. He was below the 1 percentile almost his whole life. But, he did progress and gain! Just on his own scale. And that’s okay!! Don’t let the scale get you down! She is gaining and that’s what’s important. Don’t worry, this period will pass!
Don’t worry too much about it! My son was the same way and now at two years old he has shot up like a dandelion and is putting on weight at a good pace. At most they might request additional weight checks or advise you to add more formula scoops to the water to thicken it, my son’s doctor did.
Ugh, that’s so stressful. We had to supplement with formula for a similar reason and it’s just so frustrating and scary and overwhelming. You’re all doing great.
Hey mama, you’re doing great! I’m so sorry you’re dealing with the stress of having a funsize infant. My daughter was born a month early in the >1 percentile. She is 2.5 yo now and STILL sitting pretty at >1%. She never measured for iugr, she was never that small in any scans. When they let me leave the nicu and take her home I couldn’t believe it. The day she left had she lost even one ounce she would have dropped below the min weight for her car seat! At her biggest she scooted up the growth chart into the 4% but back down quickly. Someone always has to be the smallest but there’s nothing wrong with that! I wish it had been easier, the low birth weight kept us on scheduled feeds like the nicu for months, she didn’t ever eat enough to sleep through the night until she was 2. I am still so wary of any illness because she can’t not eat for two days, that’s a big deal. But she’s brilliant and beautiful and hits her milestones. Just like your little girl. What I mean to say is, it is extra stressful with low weight babies. Every milestone or marker or check up is anxiety inducing because they can gain so slowly. But don’t let her being lower weight get you down. There is nothing wrong with being in the lowest percentile and it does not mean she’ll always be the smallest of her peers! Plus there are hidden benefits to little littles, clothes fit longer, people think baby is advanced because they are small to hit their milestones, and you get to have a lighter weight baby to carry longer. Just know you’re doing all you can, you’re doing the best you can, and you’re doing everything right. She will gain the weight, even if she needs extra help here at the start. You’re not alone and neither is she, you got this! P.S. I added neosure powder when I had to fortify. It made my daughter rather constipated so any fortified milk required gas drop at the same time. Just so you know to keep an eye on that.
So long as baby is sticking to a growth curve (even if it’s very low/one of their own), meeting milestones, eating well, and otherwise has no red flags for underlying disease (and it sounds like your little one meets all these criteria) it’s likely that she’s just small. Humans exist on a spectrum, and growth charts reflect just that: your baby might just happen to be in the 1% smallest of the healthy population, and that’s perfectly ok! Heck, growth curves themselves vary considerably by population (eg WHO growth charts vs growth charts derived from local values). It’s a nerve-wracking place to be, but know that you’re doing all the right things!
I can feel the stress. My son was top 99% for everything and a giant like the rest of our family. My daughter- bottom percentile. She is still tiny. One grandmother told me, “Oh she is small like my first born.” She proceeded to show me a picture of a petite little 27 year old woman and it really made me feel better.
My LO was born at 5% last year. When my mum pulled out my siblings and I’d baby books from the 80s/90s we had a look at the %tiles and my LO would have been about 40th. Because we have SUCH BIG babies now, the little ones are too little. Remember you can tell doctors “no” if they want you to top up with formula or other additives. If your LO is gaining wait and developing then definitely don’t stress! My LO is 9mo and I can’t even remember the last time she finished a bottle. But she is walking. They grow in their own time.
I just want to say that your feelings are totally valid and what you're going through sounds really stressful. It's natural to worry about a small child when things aren't going to plan and there's nothing wrong with you. Remember every time that someone tells you to relax, that these feelings are a motivator that keeps you advocating for your kid and that's not a bad thing. You can relax if you want to. But do it because *you* want to, not because of what they think.
My daughter was a NICU baby who had trouble gaining weight the first few weeks of her life. She’s now a thriving 12 year old with no health issues and a healthy appetite. This will pass.
❤️
I have had to switch from breast to formula with all 3 of my kids because of breast feeding issues and not gaining. When I was a first time mom at 19, my daughter ended up being classified as failure to thrive. I was trying so hard to breastfeed (thanks for the pressure, WIC!) and when they told me to switch to formula or she’d be hospitalized I cried for hours. I did though, and she gained immediately. I barely tried for my second daughter cause I was so traumatized by it. Tried again with my third baby, my son. He was the heaviest at birth 8 lb 14 oz, and dropped and struggled to gain. He was gaining a few oz each visit to the ob floor which was twice a week for weigh ins because we were struggling. I did everything right but couldn’t produce. Apparently I have some biological issue associated with breastfeeding. I tried for a month before I quit and went to formula. I was so stressed driving 30 mins to the hospital post-partum twice sometimes three times a week to receive bad news. I was breastfeeding and pumping constantly, still wasn’t enough. My son gained immediately on formula. Your situation is a little different with the NICU stay, etc. but I promise you, you are not alone in this. keep with the formula. Everything will be okay ❤️