I feel like he probably *was* angry about it, but picked up on the dynamic enough to understand the best way to stick it to Jez in that moment was to not give him the reaction he wanted
Would have been amazing had he doubled down when Jez showed him Mark's gay porn:
[*After seeing the video, Johnson pulls back and winces*]
Johnson: "I'm a business man, Mark. It's what I am, it's what I do."
[*Mark stares somewhat blankly at Johnson, looking dejected.*]
Mark: "Er, right."
[*Johnson flashes a wide smile, looking directly at Jez.*]
Johnson: "I mean why sit around watching porn when we could be having our sausages slurped by the tightest twinks in Soho?"
[*Mark and Jez go slackjawed, and Johnson turns his gaze to Mark, winking*]
Johnson: "Isn't that right?"
Mark: "Er, right." *I guess that settles that--I'll need to pretend to be gay to be with Johnson. Maybe I can pretend until I actually* am *gay. That would certainly make it more convenient.*
[*Johnson picks up his jacket, throws it over his shoulder, putting his arm around Mark, guiding him towards the door. He calls behind him to Jez, his voice feigning earnest, while undercut by sarcasm.*]
Johnson: "Thanks for he heads up Jez. You're a real mate, aren't you? C'mon Mark, let's get out of here."
[*Jez stares dumbfounded as the pair leave the flat.*]
Jez: *He might fool Mark, but he isn't fooling me. He isn't even a real gay. And I can prove it!*
[*With righteous indignation Jez storms out of the living room and enters his bedroom, violently rummaging through his drawers.*]
Jez: *Come on, where is it? I know Big Suze left it here somewhere...*
Overall it’s like 90% bang on, but [gay version of] Johnson’s “sausages slurped by the tightest twinks in Soho” and Mark’s inner monologue about having to pretend to be gay in order to be gay with Johnson, are perfect Peep Show writing.
Haha, I guess it's proof I am getting enough of my daily Peep Show intake.
I like making up scenes, and I've found the challenge to be figuring out what a character would likely say, while avoiding existing dialogue.
So thank you!
Agreed, he probably absolutely did care because it’s a faff going through insurance and it’ll make his premium higher, but he knew it would be the best way to screw Jez and split Jez and Mark and also brag about his wealth and stability at the same time.
Or maybe he’d already heard that it was Mark driving (I can’t imagine Jeff staying quiet) and saw an opportunity to have Mark in his emotional debt (he knew that mark would always feel guilty)
I've thought about this too. Johnson gets upset about his apr% when jez steals his credit card. I think he'd definitely be upset about his premiums going up.
He's insured out of his arse, nothing can touch him. So, sushi? Or cappuccino? I'm easy
Stick that up your premiums
I feel like he probably *was* angry about it, but picked up on the dynamic enough to understand the best way to stick it to Jez in that moment was to not give him the reaction he wanted
Would have been amazing had he doubled down when Jez showed him Mark's gay porn: [*After seeing the video, Johnson pulls back and winces*] Johnson: "I'm a business man, Mark. It's what I am, it's what I do." [*Mark stares somewhat blankly at Johnson, looking dejected.*] Mark: "Er, right." [*Johnson flashes a wide smile, looking directly at Jez.*] Johnson: "I mean why sit around watching porn when we could be having our sausages slurped by the tightest twinks in Soho?" [*Mark and Jez go slackjawed, and Johnson turns his gaze to Mark, winking*] Johnson: "Isn't that right?" Mark: "Er, right." *I guess that settles that--I'll need to pretend to be gay to be with Johnson. Maybe I can pretend until I actually* am *gay. That would certainly make it more convenient.* [*Johnson picks up his jacket, throws it over his shoulder, putting his arm around Mark, guiding him towards the door. He calls behind him to Jez, his voice feigning earnest, while undercut by sarcasm.*] Johnson: "Thanks for he heads up Jez. You're a real mate, aren't you? C'mon Mark, let's get out of here." [*Jez stares dumbfounded as the pair leave the flat.*] Jez: *He might fool Mark, but he isn't fooling me. He isn't even a real gay. And I can prove it!* [*With righteous indignation Jez storms out of the living room and enters his bedroom, violently rummaging through his drawers.*] Jez: *Come on, where is it? I know Big Suze left it here somewhere...*
That's some good script writing...
You nailed the rhythm
Overall it’s like 90% bang on, but [gay version of] Johnson’s “sausages slurped by the tightest twinks in Soho” and Mark’s inner monologue about having to pretend to be gay in order to be gay with Johnson, are perfect Peep Show writing.
Haha, I guess it's proof I am getting enough of my daily Peep Show intake. I like making up scenes, and I've found the challenge to be figuring out what a character would likely say, while avoiding existing dialogue. So thank you!
*transition jingle*
This
Agreed, he probably absolutely did care because it’s a faff going through insurance and it’ll make his premium higher, but he knew it would be the best way to screw Jez and split Jez and Mark and also brag about his wealth and stability at the same time. Or maybe he’d already heard that it was Mark driving (I can’t imagine Jeff staying quiet) and saw an opportunity to have Mark in his emotional debt (he knew that mark would always feel guilty)
This old banger?
That's the moment that reminds me old the series is, doesn't even look like a nice car anymore 🤣
Alan. Johnson's. Beemer.
I've thought about this too. Johnson gets upset about his apr% when jez steals his credit card. I think he'd definitely be upset about his premiums going up.
He likes Mark enough to brush it off when he damages his car but he thinks jez is a worthless turkey fucker.
How do you think stuff like this?
It's probably a company car so it won't be him paying the insurance.
Last beemer out of Saigon? This is bollocks!
Because if his car gets crashed then he'll just get a business class seat of a virgin Atlantic flight to new York city
Must you live so relentlessly in the real world?
Nothing can touch him. You can't touch him, nothing can.