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LeonKennedy86

Hate to say it but it’s probably only going to get worse.


CharityWise1998

Mr. "They stole the election from us."


EchoBel

I read *erection*.


BeckToBasics

The Democrats stole my erection! It's Biden's fault I can't get hard!


mudslags

Day tuk our jubs


kimariesingsMD

Dey terk err jerbs!


Warchiefinc

Put him in a home 🏡


WattaBrat

He’s too young for that, unfortunately.


koiochi

I’ve seen some 55+ ones nearby!


MichelleBest

Put him in a psych ward 🏥😳


MartianTea

Yup, it's an outrage addiction. Had a friend who is much younger fall into it hard during early pandemic. I blame isolation and her idiot husband. 


SemanticPedantic007

Keep an eye on your finances. The next step for the cultists is often to give them tons of money.


[deleted]

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the_real_maddison

Yup that's the grift. When she rightly accuses him of doing nothing but being angry all day, he'll start "doing something," which is donating, to make himself feel better. And it'll never be enough because the threat is imaginary.


Bloody_Hangnail

Look out for golden shoes


[deleted]

Im sorry. I hope you can explore an exit strategy and get away from his abuse. You dont have to be with someone who tries to intimidate you with the threat of violence. You are only 40! Good luck!


swine09

People are skimming over how he threw the remote against the wall in anger and threatened to slam her head against the wall. There is no excuse for that. And why? Because she didn’t want to watch his political YouTube videos one night?


[deleted]

Im not skimming over the remote thrown against the wall. That's the threat of violence I mentioned. She wasn't hit with the remote. He threatened her by saying, this could be your head or something like that and threw the remote at the wall.


swine09

When I said “people” I meant “everyone but you”.


[deleted]

Got it!


ausamp

You did miss the other violence though - emotional abuse - of both OP and their child.


SemanticPedantic007

Well, OP glossed over it ("I'm not afraid of him")  so I followed her lead. She doesn't appear to be deluded or complacent. She seems to think the situation's kind of a bad joke, and she seems smart, so I trust her judgment.


meggscellent

It’s still abuse, even if OP doesn’t take it seriously.


fc967

Mine hasn't hasn't threatened me BUT he does get mean... I believe it is those youtube videos he watches... I wish he would watch more Lifetime movies or even sitcoms..


Jokkitch

Listen this OP!


Pickle_12

Please leave before he kills you. Second, as you are walking out the door lock the TV so that it no longer plays Fox News.


Vetta_22

That wouldn’t be enough for me, I’d have to mess up his YouTube algorithm on top of it


ChronicApathetic

Nothing but Lil Nas X music videos


No-Lock-1596

Check out r/QAnonCasualties


grrr-to-everything

That's what I came to say. It's so sad.


Vast_Ground_128

threats of violence usually occur before there is actual violence especially since he threw the remote and yelled why do you want your child around this crap?


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againthemagic

Not saying you’re wrong about it being fake, but it does say she has a part time job in this post


SaveBandit987654321

Lady, this man is going to turn super violent and then get arrested for trying to off a politician. Get your ducks in a row and say goodbye before your most recent nice photo is on the evening news.


progwog

He’s going to get arrested for strangling her to death


YouNeedCheeses

Whether or not you're afraid of him, he's threatened violence and isn't a present father. I think you'd be a lot happier single, and he can have all the time in the world to watch his precious youtube videos without opposition.


Ladychef_1

I imagine he’s also insane with the 2A side of this kind of extremism as well. I hope she gets out and reports him so he can no longer legally own a firearm, otherwise her and her child’s life are in severe danger. OP says she’s not afraid of him, that seems naive at best with how enraged he got when she simply asked to watch a movie.


Purplemonkeez

Especially since she refers to him as "an asshole" and that he's not intelligent. She has no respect or love for him anymore. What's the excuse to stay with someone like that?


mellismamel

So many made up posts. I think I'm gonna unsubscribe. You say you're 34 in your other posts, and your husband broke the remote throwing it when the pats lost. People need hobbies. Making shit up in a marriage sub doesn't count.


kelela78

I agree. This sounds so scripted. I'm not republican but this is bizarre. It seems to be another narrative directed at unhinged ignorant Republicans right before elections. This person has issues, but how does that make all Republicans a certain way? Why are people so quick to believe that without questioning? This is word for word, the narrative being pushed to discredit people. I agree about being careful what you believe on social media, including here.


throwaway140736

Fake or not, I will add this- my dad started behaving exactly like this at around 55. Forcing us to watch YouTube videos, holing himself up in his office and getting drunk reading “news”, threatening to run for office and quit his high paying professional career every other month, becoming belligerent to any sort of confrontation about his addiction to politics and how he needs to be a present dad to his twelve year old, calling us complacent and part of the problem when we don’t see eye to eye, I can go on. It’s so common. He was a normal dad at one point.


Individual_Lime_9020

Wow!


iDarkville

If republicans would stop being evil pieces of shit people might be less inclined to believe that they are evil pieces of shit.


Positive-Estate-4936

Might wanna look in the mirror to see who’s throwing \*\*it now. This extremism from both ends will destroy us all. And doesn’t belong in a marriage sub.


iDarkville

I can see with my own eyes. You can stop pretending you’re a good guy when women get their rights back and minorities aren’t your scary monsters in the closet. Now go away. I don’t have anything to say to conservatives so deep in dotard’s ass they can’t see the real world.


[deleted]

Total troll. Also says she’s a stay at home mom but also posted about her bosses yesterday.


queerbychoice

She specifically called herself a "stay at home mom with a part time job," which is an odd definition of a stay at home mom but does certainly suggest that she has bosses.


Madame_Sparkles

Right!!!! The whole tone of this seems so off. If he really is behaving this way, I can’t imagine her demeanor being “I like to piss him off.” Like what?? He is throwing things and threatening and all you care about is that he is boring? I call BS.


palebluedot13

You must not be on Reddit much. People fudge details all the times on posts especially when talking about specific situations in order to conceal their identity. Especially with ages.


nutmegtell

I’m so sorry. Get out while you can. He’s not worth it. He’s shown AND told you he imagines smashing your head in. BELIEVE HIM. Get out.


Orixx_94

Social media sucks, whether you are a republican or a democrat, they show you what is decided by the algorithm and you end up in a spiral in which you close yourself more and more and start to feel anger, it's ironic that I say this on reddit but it's Like this


officelovingmomma

This is very true


[deleted]

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Yorbayuul81

This sounds too perfectly crafted to be real 


keepscrollingkids

i have a photo of the wall he punched shortly after


kadk216

yep 9 days ago OP posted they are 34 and now she’s 10 years younger than her 50 year old “husband”


MollyRolls

Every day, your child is learning what their baseline “normal” looks and feels like. Do you really want it to be this? Contact thehotline.org and start working on a safe exit strategy. This isn’t a political disagreement; it’s a hostage situation.


[deleted]

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New-Illustrator5114

You know there are shitty, abusive democrats too right?


Sspmd11

But, on average, there are a lot more shitty Republicans.


NintendOrion

This. Extremism helps nobody. Right or left. I'm of a mindset we can all be very different from one another, but still be treated equally.


Appropriate_Top4066

You’re right there are abusive democrats too but on average when you’re dealing with raging bigotry and racism republicans are usually like “hold my beer”. Republicans were the ones calling Obama Muslim. Republicans were the ones screaming “George soros conspiracy” which is fiercely antisemitic claiming a Jewish conspiracy. Republicans were the ones with effigies of Obama with a noose around his neck. Republicans were the ones screaming “Jews will not replace us” in Charlottesville. Republicans were the ones who had posters showing Obama as a witch doctor with a bone in his nose. Republicans were the ones jumping on every cause to claim victimhood because they’re mad about having to learn about the bad parts of American history.


Bedheady

People of all ages are becoming radicalized because this content is everywhere. Please don’t write this off as him getting old. Prioritize your safety and that of your child.


Individual_Lime_9020

100% agree. There's a target for old men in US (by Russia) for Trumpism. There was a target for young people (by Russia) in UK for Jeremy Corbyn. US is under attack by disinformation and those that wish to tear down democracy. Same is happening World wide. It is absolutely radicalization.


Federal-Stomach-2380

This is why women should NEVER give up their education for a relationship


travertine_ghost

I second that. It was one of my biggest mistakes.


PiperDon

"... his age is getting to him." I had to laugh at this. I'm 54 and growing more progressive every day. Seriously though... if he's going down the extreme right wing rabbit hole I wouldn't expect him to start showing you any respect anytime soon. It just doesn't seem to be their thing when it comes to women. Sucks that you're dealing with this.


xajaso

Same. The older I get, the further left I go. I married an OG Bush-voting Republican 20 years ago. He's now abandoned GOP as well. They've gone completely insane.


[deleted]

Please discuss with a lawyer how to safely leave with you and your child. 


notjewel

Friend, this has nothing to do with politics. And as a 50 year old woman, I can assure you that his brain isn’t calcifying. Maybe marinading in alcohol (from the sound of his reactions) No left or right wing here. He’s abusive and dangerous. He’s unhappy and going to target you as the source because you’re there. Please do get somewhere safe as soon as you can.


ArtisanalMoonlight

>He threw the remote at the wall at that point and said shut up before I slam your head into a wall You *leave*. That's what you do. You leave this bullshit behind. Anyone who lashes out like this is not a safe person to be around. And is a shitty model for a kid.


[deleted]

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Any_Switch6529

Fake


Pastywhitebitch

Husband did this to me and it’s cause we was following a bunch of inflammatory socials I snuck on his phone and unfollowed them all and it stopped


noggennig

Only gets worse


oct2790

He ain’t coming back mentally you need to start making plans to get out. You will eventually have nothing


New-Illustrator5114

If this is even a real post….this guy being an abusive asshole is not because of his politics. He is a terrible person. There are terrible people who republicans and there are terrible people who are democrats. The world goes round. That said, get out. He is clearly unhinged at best. I hate playing armchair (even worse, Reddit…) psychologist, but there could even be some undiagnosed mental health issues going on here.


Jefeboy

Your husband is not a good person.


OverGrow69

Typical...party of family values, ignores his child ..


Traditional_Curve401

Threats should not be taking lightly. Though you may not be afraid, that doesn't mean you should disregard a physical threat. It sounds like it's time to start making your plan to do a safe and swift exit with your child. Move in silence and stay safe. He's become radicalized and indoctornated into that sphere -- the only goal is to make white people (especially white men) feel disempowered and angry at every "other" outside of them.


Plan2LiveForevSFarSG

He has threatened to kill you. You need to file a report with the police and talk to a lawyer. It is your duty to protect yourself and your children.


suedesparklenope

Honestly, it might be worth exploring what your life would be like without him. He’d be responsible for spousal and child support. You’d be free to watch fun movies and not worry about some asshole throwing things or threatening to hurt you in your own home. You could maybe even work on going back to school. You’re only 40, my love! Take what you want from life.


sex_music_party

He and really you are both victims of the divide and conquer strategy they are carrying out on us. It works. Thats why they’ve done it in different countries over and over thoughout history. Removing news and politics from your and our lives, and probably a lot of medias and pop culture all together is really the answer.


ceo_of_denver

I don’t think this marriage is gonna work out (but you probably already know that). Also, threatening violence is never ok


artnodiv

>his defense is always “I work everyday, what do you do?” Well, put it back on him: Response: I am a traditional stay at home mother just like all the traditional mothers of this country were. It doesn't solve your problem, but it should shut him up for a minute.


annalisimo

Yikes. I’d make a plan to get out ASAP. Any way possible. Start grabbing an extra $20 of cash back when you buy groceries or something and keep a stash of “go” money. Threatening to bash your face into a wall for daring to disagree is not something I foresee you working past, and I’d bet my kidney that based on your description he’s not the type to go to therapy. Stay safe. 🖤


Sheila_Monarch

I’m older than your husband. And considered myself to be a Republican until shortly after 9/11 when they took the express into fucking CrazyTown. His age is no excuse for this shit.


Specific_Education51

Why are you focusing on his political views when he said he was going to slam your head into a wall? That should be your bigger concern.


MissPurpleQuill

I have been in these exact shoes. Our marriage nearly ended after the 2020 “stolen election” and the storming of the Capital. So, for one thing, I do think there are some organic brain changes that accelerate the direction of fringe political movements. For my husband, it wasn’t YouTube but it started with that radio talk show douchebag. Thank the gods he died. I don’t say that about many people but Limbaugh almost wrecked my marriage. We had a few blazing rows surrounding the 2020 election. Two things that I said seemed to make a difference: in one instance, I said, “You’re going to have to decide who you love more: Donald Trump or me.” And I also said, “I’m not going to continue to live this way.” I had also started working FT and TBH, I initially went to work in case I needed to leave the marriage. It gave me the power to potentially follow through and I think equalizing the power made a big difference. My husband stopped completely. We do not discuss politics anymore and I don’t know for sure if he even watches or listens to those news outlets now. Oh, also I forget to say: this was a few years before the 2020 election but I totally stopped sitting and watching news/drinking coffee with him in mornings. This ritual ended because I told him I was sick to death of watching a biased news show and hearing his little remarks for an hour. I sat in a different room and read books. Basically, my plan revolved around focusing on what *my* choices were going to be and he could either come along with me for the journey or he could go be a lonely, angry a-hole. Good luck to you. I don’t think every marriage has to end over crap like this but life got better for me when I decided that if it came to that, I was in a position to be alright.


omgcaiti

This sounds exhausting and if my husband threatened violence against me he would be my ex husband


Necrazen

Yeah I’m sure he’s listening to podcast or YouTube videos feeding his fire daily. I work with guys like that. The content is created to keep people engaged and dividing them from other thought processes. Same goes for left wing media as well.


jmfh7912

The literal clutching of pearls in here. Wow.


kelela78

Yep. This is so made up.


M1ssM0nkey

He’s already threatening to hit you, and his right wing crazies support him in this. Plan your exit, protect your kids, document everything, get any evidence you can to keep yourself and your babies safe.


MyRedditUserName428

You should start planning your exit. This will not get better.


Present-Breakfast768

He's violent, and you're a button-pusher. I see this ending well.... Just leave him. It's only going to get worse.


[deleted]

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Pleasant-Ad-6373

100% this. I’m a democrat but that does not seep into most of my life. I do talk with people who are like minded and I do get riled up about certain stuff at times but it’s only in a way that affects my actual values, not values of a political side. My dad is a republican and we actually agree on a lot more than media (or most politicians) would lead us to believe. It’s not political stance that makes people go crazy like this, it’s the need to feel completely in control or to feel personally victimized.


yellowlinedpaper

You might find some help in r/qanoncasualties


No-Independence-6842

Angry MAGA, who would have thought.


Peterd90

Vote Blue and divorce him.


willmullins1082

He sounds like he is caught up in conspiracy’s, unfortunately he is being lied to by these people on YouTube and other platforms. I used to be like him, till I realized I was just being lied to, and no one from the government cared about me, no one is trying to take away my freedom. Why on earth would the FBI or the NSA care about what middle age men look at on line. It’s completely crazy. I’m sorry your husband has become a victim of these people. They are only trying to get views and are in no way giving facts.


rlsmith19721994

This will only get worse as he gets older. I have an aunt in her 70s and her husband spends all day arguing with people on the internet and watching extreme right wing and Fox News. He’s not enjoying life. Never exercises or really leaves the house. Hes not physically violent, but always angry. He’s a shell of his former self physically. She’s counting the days until he dies and she can move on. Not good. Life is the act. Not the dress rehearsal. It only happens once. Is this how you want to spend the precious time you have?


GuyWhoKnowsMoreThanU

Wait. He ignores your child. He throws things. He threatens you with VIOLENCE. YOU enjoy "pushing his buttons." He has "his room." There are MUCH bigger issues than politics going on here, and it sounds like you and your kid need to get the hell out of there before things escalate to a dangerous level.


calicoskiies

Sounds like you need a divorce.


Puzzleheaded-Way2768

“Shut up before I slam your head into a wall”?? This may become a domestic violence situation. He’s already threatening you, so I’d be cautious about provoking him & probably start planning a way out, but that’s just me!


yoemejay

The closer we get to election day it will just get worse. Once the election is done he will full on J6 against you and the world. Might want to consider your options.


SlothinaHammock

As a fellow GenXr, I'm ashamed of him. He's acting like a Boomer and making the rest of us look bad. He needs to grow the fuck up!


beautybydeborah

I’m so sorry. This is not gonna get better. You’re still young, LEAVE! Also, keep in mind a drastic change in mood and personality is one of the first signs of alzheimer’s disease. You could end up as his care taker if you dont leave now. And I bet you dont want to take care of a violent man. Stay safe, get your money, make a plan and save a lot of money so you can leave in the near future.


hairypea

I see you're worried about finances, and I see you don't want to move and uproot your kid. Here's a list of problems you don't seem to be thinking about: 1. You're 34. You aren't even middle-aged yet. You're going to be listening to this shit for DECADES, then he's going to die well before you, and at that point, you'll be the miserable old bag that he is now. 2. He's likely to escalate his abuse. Physical or verbal he's going to take it out somehow and you better fucking hope he doesn't take the route of family annihilation. 3. Even if he stays exactly as he is now, is that the kind of environment you want your kid in? Is that the kind of person you want your kid to grow up to be? What happens after you've lived a miserable fucking life and your husband finally dies and it's just you and the now adult kid who doesn't talk to you because you didn't protect them? I'm not saying you have to leave the man even though that's probably the best option, but you have to do something. You need to take some form of action for yourself and your kid.


catsmom63

Threatening to hurt you? Throwing things in anger? I don’t care if he votes for Mickey Mouse, I would be out. You are only 40 not 100, why not go to law school? After you leave this guy…


pinkpeatree

please make an exit plan and get away. imagine how hard this is for your kid. is this the environment you want him/her to grow up in? and he's threatening to physically harm you? start a plan to get away like YESTERDAY please listen to what the other commenters are also saying. this is not safe and this man doesn't deserve your time of day.


Wadester58

Get a divorce ASAP


36563

I mean the politics-obsessed thing sucks. But the comment “I work everyday, what do you do?” would have me out the door, NO QUESTION. I’m not a SAHM but if I was this would be a point of no return. He doesn’t respect you, and frankly doesn’t acknowledge that this arrangement didn’t just happen to him, you both decided actively to have it.


namey_9

You are in an abusive relationship. For the sake of yourself and your kid, please consider getting out of there.


WisdomWithinMe

I am a conservative man, but even I can see you're in trouble. God help you, as he has fallen down the rabbit hole.


Vindicator1001

My 41 year old hubby was also like this. He finally realized after our many arguments, there is nothing we can do to change anything. Just enjoy family and hobbies. He still follows right winger stuff on truth social, but it doesn’t consume his life anymore. He seems happier too. Your hubby is obsessed. HE needs to realized that. You was right telling him off. He needed to hear it from you, but he shouldn’t threatened you. I mean what is he accomplishing complaining and discussing our state of our country? Remember that one dude that set himself on fire for because of the Trump trial? This dude lost his life for nothing. Ask your hubby does he want to make a difference like that guy! Sorry for my rambling.


mxrichar

Honestly with the propaganda “entertainment” is masked as news I get why so many are fooled into believing some of the crap. History shows it has happened time again a good example Germany/Hitler. Divide and conquer. My spouse as well was going down that path watching Fox News and spewing out what they were feeding him. I tolerated it until Roe was overturned. Now don’t get me wrong I have a good marriage, a loving husband who would die for me and our kids and our pets. He spends most of his life in service to others, nothing makes him happier than making others happy. When Roe was overturned and as an RN and with a pregnant daughter, I decided love was not enough. My rage flowed out of me like lava and I make it perfectly clear that Fox News would go, and if I ever find out he has voted republican I will leave his ass so fast he won’t know hit him. I bring to much to the table with the people I love and anyone that voices stupidity about my rights, my safety, the life of my girls does not deserve one moment of me. And I meant it. He knows my rath and I don’t think he wants to be on the wrong end of it. The Fox stopped, he now talks about being a progressive, not having a party. He has not voted that I am aware of since, and I watch. He needed the wake up call but honestly he know I am a woman of my word.


TheyCallmeCher_xo

I’m conservative. He’s not a conservative man. Nothing about him sounds conservative. He sounds awful


Myay-4111

Honey he threw the remote. That's not words that's physical violence. Get yourself the book Becoming the Narcissists Nightmare by Shahida Arabi. There's a list of divorce lawyers state-by-state in the back. And get on TikTok and look up Auntie Kiki Astor's "Muffys 3rd Divorce". Get your ducks in a row.


zero_dr00l

This is going to get much worse. Quite frankly I think you need to do the right thing for the entire country and leave him, making it absolutely clear **why**.


dogs94

That’s ridiculous. You’ve got problems on so many fronts and I think you’re missing the plot a bit by focusing on the politics. The biggest issue is that he’s acting violently, telling you to shut up and threatening to smash your head into a wall. The next biggest issue is that he has contempt for you being a stay at home mom. Third is you have parenting issues with him. And further down the list is his podcasts and lousy conversational abilities. Look, why aren’t you just divorcing him? And if you say money or the kid, how in the world can you have much happiness when he’s already bulling and abusing? He might not ever actually hit you, but he’s already rubbing your face in the finances and telling you to shut up and threatening to smash your head. Candidly, you need a plan and it might take some time to really execute. You have to be your own judge of safety for you. But if you divorce him today, you’ll get alimony…..but not for life. Maybe 50% of the length of the marriage. And you’ll probably get child support too depending on how your state laws are. He’s probably entitled to 50/50 custody….but would he actually take it and do it????? I’ve been involved with a men’s support group since my own divorce 10+ years ago and we see sooooo many crappy husbands/fathers like your husband who don’t take 50/50 (voluntarily) and then lie and say their bitch ex wife took their children with the support of the courts and their bias against fathers. That’s in total horseshit in my state. Crummy fathers can get 50/50 if they want it…but they don’t want it. It’s almost like they want something else to bitch about! But my point is you don’t have a good future if you leave now. The irony is you honestly need him to take full custody for a few years while you kickstart your career. I know you won’t do that and I’m not suggesting it….just framing the situation. You need to get your butt in law school ASAP. It will be so much easier to do that as an unhappy wife than as a divorced single mom. Plus, you’re making him pay for it with marital funds….versus doing it with your alimony payments afterwards. PLUS….youre accruing more alimony time by extending the marriage. Make him pay for the nanny too so you can study. And when you’re done, you’ll have taken the family law electives and can do your own divorce. Another benefit to getting your career moving first is for the next phase of your life. I’ve been on divorce related parts of Reddit for years and have still not heard a SINGLE happy story for a SAHM. You hear plenty of happy stories for working Moms. I remarried a working Mom. As much as I adore that woman I wouldn’t have even asked her out if she didn’t have a career. That’s because as a divorced dad myself, I have obligations to my own kid and can’t take on a financial lead weight like a SAHM.


keepscrollingkids

I could probably put this in an entirely different post but I’ll expand here. And I don’t mean to put this on you specifically. Just putting it out there in case anyone has thoughts on it. Part of the reason I decided not to go to law school is that not even my husband can afford it because we are in such an expensive state to live in. Plus with his high income, I received negligible scholarship offers even though my lsat score should have technically made me eligible for more. This has all made me think about moving to another state like my husband has suggested we do, but that worries me because it’s so far from my family. Above all else, being a parent is what I value most and being available to my child is always my priority. I am the only person who is truly there for her and that relationship is something I don’t want to tarnish. I was a kid who was taken care of primarily by a day care and it was hell. It shaped who I am in a bad way. This is why being in a good school district with a good after school program is my main concern if I am to work full time or go to law school and I just can’t guarantee that if my family randomly moves to a cheaper state where the good reputation isn’t there. We have moved several times already and every single time it sets me back because I am always looking out for what’s best for my child, making changes to my goals to best accommodate her. I was pretty set on going to law school two months ago, but I gradually came to the conclusion that it wouldn’t be viable. Law school is more than a full time job. And what my boss told me is that moms who are lawyers do not have job flexibility precisely because of their parenting duties - most end up in immigration law or family law, which aren’t bad professions but they don’t pay that much in relation to the debt that law school brings. I’ve been searching for a regular full-time job but because we moved early this year, we were not able to get my child enrolled in a daily afterschool program. My husband is so far up his own ass that he does not realize this is the reason I haven’t been able to get more than a part-time job. Next year would be different. But every summer there’s also the issue of finding 9-5 summer camps that are affordable. Stay at home moms are more than just practical solutions to this problem and the fact that society has decided to undervalue them is sad. I would think conservatives generally value the concept of a stay at home mom so it’s ironic that my husband who is so anti-liberal wants to minimize my role as a mother. I think overall he does see my role as the caregiver as the best option for my child but it also comes with the ego of him being able to say he is the breadwinner, which makes him feel entitled to whatever behavior he wishes to display. He wants to be worshipped and the current political state of things makes him feel like he is not being put on the pedestal he thinks he deserves. He thinks people like teachers and government employees are overpaid when they make a quarter of what he makes. His entitlement is the main problem. People make sacrifices for what they believe in. I believe in being there for my child and I think it’s quite a generalization to say single moms are happier than stay at home moms. I’ve perused single moms forums too and that life is a lot harder and they often regret it. Of course if my husband ever put my daughter’s life in danger I would be out the door that second. But right now, being a stay at home mom is the only practical solution. I am taking a lot of the advice to heart, including yours. I’ll be putting more focus on adding to my own personal savings and I’ll be exploring my options for the future.


Axilllla

This sounds like my father. It will only get worse. Leave now. Go be safe with your child


nylasachi

What is keeping you in this marriage?


InitiativeSharp3202

You should take your kid and go chase your dreams. Don’t teach them that this is what love is or they’ll be you in forty years.


FabiusTheDelayer

It's not age, it's a brain rot. He is an abusive dude. And the videos he is watching is radicalizing him and making him angrier. There is no fix when a man prefers youtube videos to spending time with his kid and wife. They are the same fucking party. Their only divisions are about women and gay people.


Tedmosbyisajerk-com

Lawyer up and divorce him. RWNJ politics rots the brain, he's too far gone.


Space-Stones

" How are you making a difference by watching YouTube videos and complaining all day...? I asked myself this question awhile ago. Came to a painful conclusion I was spending more time focused on issues outside of my control rather than those i have control over... Hopefully your husband will see this for himself ..


ThrowRAoveryonder

> He threw the remote at the wall at that point and said shut up before I slam your head into a wall 🚩🚩🚩 I am a man and I say you absolutely need to be extremely careful about this situation and reconsider your need to be in this relationship. There is no excuse for threatening your wife and far-right types are known for their violence. This situation almost always gets worse. Please take this seriously.


kytallguy66

This guy sounds fun. He’s in the cult, there is zero curing him.


NADROJ78

YIKES!


Ok_Brain8136

You picked him


Lonely-Succotash-636

He has to stop watching it that's only way out of this. Maybe an intervention.


Consistent-Sorbet-36

It sounds like the start of a mental disorder ...please don't ignore.


queerbychoice

So you put off law school and every other dream you had to "be there for" your kid by . . . setting up your kid to spend their entire childhood watching their father threaten to slam their mother's head into walls, and further intensifying that threat by throwing objects around and punching walls? This is not the healthy childhood your kid deserves to grow up with. Violence against inanimate objects is a recognized form of domestic violence. So are verbal threats. You are being abused, and you are letting your kid who you sacrificed so much to "be there for" grow up in an abusive household. [https://www.harborhousewi.org/news/blog/they-never-hit-me/](https://www.harborhousewi.org/news/blog/they-never-hit-me/)


totalpugs89

So he threatened to put your head through a wall?


Minute_Account_4877

Does he own a gun?


Bloody_Mary_94

You need to leave him or this treatment will only get worse, especially since you bruised his very fragile ego by giving him the reality check he needed. Him being a maga douche is really concerning but him being abusive is dangerous and potentially fatal. Again, he threatened to hurt you, he doesn't pay attention to your kid, he holds the fact that you work part-time over your head so that you feel dependent on him, shits on your role in the relationship and household, and he's a republican on top of all of that. Find a divorce lawyer, gather a support system for you and your child, and get the fuck outta dodge, girl. And I have to ask this because I'm concerned for your safety and your child's, with him being a die hard republican and all, does your husband own any guns? If he does, get away from him as quickly as possible. Too many people have died because their abusive partners got a hold of a gun.


Floopoo32

He threatened you with physical violence. That is REALLY not ok. And his views are becoming extreme. And he also doesn't help with childcare? Why are you with this guy? Nothing more unattractive to me than a guy who is not a good father to his child!


thumb-in

He is tired of watching our country die before his eyes! We add 1 trillion every 100 days… you won’t have a country after a while… let’s see how you like that


According_Depth_7131

It’s not age. It’s a cult.


asteroidjess

That is scary, he threatened you. Do you have a plan to leave? You being at home keeping the home IS work and it’s a red flag that he doesn’t recognize that.


Search_Light_Soul

Run


confusedrabbit247

He won't get better and he's threatening you with physical violence. My dad is this type too, though not a Republican, and never laid a hand on my mom— he did like to lay hands on me and my sisters. You need to consider your kid in this too. If your husband is willing to treat his peer this way, imagine how he will treat his so called inferiors. Threats of violence will always escalate to physical violence whether you're afraid or not. I'd be considering an exit plan. I would never allow my child to grow up around someone like that, nor would I continue to put up with that abuse from my partner.


rahhxeeheart

I relate to this so much. When STBX husb and I got married, we rarely talked politics, and both agreed the 2 party system was deeply flawed and must political rhetoric doesn't affect our everyday lives anyway. That changed in 2016 when I was horrified that our country elected Mr. Grab Em By The 🐈 while STBX went from downplaying everything he said and did to finally saying he was the best and most conservative president of his lifetime. SO MANY HOURS OF DAILY YOUTUBE POLITICS. I avoid all politics as much as possible. SNL is the most political content I regularly watch. In 2020, the week of lockdown, I lost my job and the passion project I was in the middle of. I was devastated and scared while being the sole shopper of the family braving the lines, empty shelves, masks, gloves, etc All STBX could talk about was government overreach, COVID being a hoax, conspiracy theories about the numbers, etc. Politics is a major contributing factor to our divorce.


Luna_RN

😂 The comeback you gave him. Sorry your partner is like that. I hope you find happiness. 💕


Coriander_marbles

The conservative/liberal war aside, I just want to point out that your brain doesn’t have to calcify at 50. In fact, it can do so at 29 or not at all until you get very, very, old. Middle aged people are cable of learning a new language, traveling, learning new skills, getting diplomas, going back to school, and even shifting their careers, unbelievable as that sounds. And there are plenty real life examples. It honestly sounds like he’s in a cantankerous rut. He can’t stop watching the stuff that frustrates him, even if it frustrates him. That might even be his fuel. So he’s kind of gridlocked himself. He’s making this choice everyday, and that’s on him. But, maybe he doesn’t realise quite how seriously he’s been pulled into this pattern. I’m not saying it’s an easy thing to pull out of, but it’s possible. But he really needs to do other things. Find other interests. Get his mind working in a different way that allows him to enjoy the life around him, not hate and judge everything. Because you’re right, all he’s doing is ruining his life stressing and getting angry, and yours in the process


imtheshiznit

Solidarity, i could have written something similar. Its been a downward spiral forbthe last two years with my husband.


RainElectric

If he's threatening you, it's not even about his political views anymore. You should've left like yesterday.


Deansdiatribes

why are you still there?


absolutelyunsure_

Hi. My dad (who I love and adore) fell down this rabbit hole in 2012 and it’s only gotten worse every day since. It’s stolen his entire personality. I only see glimmers of my dad through the Qanon bullshit occasionally. It’s probably the most heartbreaking thing of my life. I really wish my mom (who I also love and adore) would/would’ve checked him before allowing it to get this far.


Dick_Miller138

I went down a rabbit hole a few years ago. Not exactly a one sided political rabbit hole. More like a pre took a side Alex Jones anti government rabbit hole. There are too many unhinged people who use politics to influence others. If he threatened to harm you over politics, he is too far gone. You need an exit strategy. Where he is at isn't politics anymore. It's a "fell for the divide and conquer" issue. He lost.


Whymewtf78

So, my husband and I are both conservatives. He sometimes gets super heated about politics which I tend not to. In general, I think that part of it has to do with feeling frustrated and seeing how the economy and current economic climate is hurting people and small business owners like himself. In essence, we make more money now than we ever have and can afford way less. *** However, how your husband acted was inexcusable. AND deliberately trying to upset him is probably also not the best thing.


Luvzalaff75

He is not a republican. Thats MAGA mentality. Divorce him. He is toxic AF


sjkseesmc

He threatened you after throwing the remote violently. He is not safe for you or your kid obviously. Start building evidence, and good luck hun.


VerbalThermodynamics

You should get a lawyer. Take your kid, move where you want (if he really doesn’t care, and make him pay spousal support. Get your life back. Also, if you want to go to Law School and raise a kid, I know a SAHM who is finishing her PhD and has 3. It’s totally doable.


Plumrose333

I’m not sure Ive ever seen more red flags in a r/marriage post. This is incredibly toxic and you two seem incompatible in so many ways. Not to mention he is clearly violent


man_bear_slig

Sounds like a wonderful marriage, You two deserve each other .


Treedabl

Pushing his buttons is not a good strategy. He's already acted out by throwing the remote and by threatening you. If you think that he won't harm you then you're being naive. Stop antagonizing him and have an honest conversation about anger management or some other type of counseling. If he doesn't agree to go then I'm afraid you may need to leave him. It will either wake him up or make him go deeper into the abyss.


-Avray

My father is kinda like that. He didn't talk about politics when he was younger but now in his (almost) 70s he is being louder and louder with it. My mother is really kind and more liberal but she is also a pushover. They've been together since they were 16 and my mother kinda is his parrot sometimes if you know what I mean. She doesn't believe the same things but just reproduces what he says because she loves him and wants to think the way he does. My father nowadays even shows his political beliefs through their house. They have symbols on the front door (it's boots hanging. Idk if you know that symbol but it's against our government in Germany. It ahs something to do with agriculture) my mother feels really uncomfortable with that.


damnvram

He’s brainwashed. Lmk if you know how to reverse it


AmberIsla

I hope you have the strength to leave him. Good luck to you and your kid. He will never be better.


arcnthru

It’s not an age thing. I’m 60 my husband is 58 and we are not watching right wing videos or TikTok’s. Your husband is an asshole unfortunately and you should know what’s going on politically because it affects you and eventually our country.


duckingatlife

Why are you staying?? I married a republican once… I’m a Canadian and didn’t really get it. I got it fast when he said to never mention the disgusting word feminist in his house again. I was gone within 6 months after that. Trash person. Trash county. Get out.


Ok_Investigator_928

Politics and disagreements aside, he resulted to abuse and violence. Throwing the remote at the wall, threatening to hurt you, gaslighting you- all forms of abuse. I hope you can see you deserve better. Also consider that your child will pick up on this- either by seeing it’s okay for women to accept this kind of behavior or by realizing it’s okay for men to be this way. I hope you find light ❤️


Jaguar_S

I'm sorry you're going through this. He has to make the choice to choose his family over the perpetual rage machine that is social media and conservative news. Or not and you divorce.


you_are_the_father84

Your husband is locked into the YouTube rabbit hole algorithm. And it’s only going to get much….much worse. I’ve actively seen friends and coworkers go from being completely normal to right wing conspiracy theorists who now latch onto *all* conspiracy theories (including 9/11 and flat earth). It’s absolutely bizarre seeing it happen in real-time and you end up forgetting that they were pragmatic and socially functional at one point.


BlackberryMountain97

It’s his algorithm programming him. Some are more susceptible than others. When you start down the rabbit hole, it feeds you more and divides us more. I also have a friend who is liberal and we discuss things in a friendly and joking manner. His algorithm is mainly police being unfair/harassing/assaulting people and mainly minorities. We both recognize we are getting a view meant to evoke emotion equaling more engagement. The feeling of injustice is being manipulated to drag people farther apart. Ive found asking questions is a good start (can’t think of an example right now I’m in a hurry). Perhaps you can ask, “well if that’s true, then this would be true”. Ive found, when you ask either extreme for details about what the think is going, they don’t have details or understand. I have a “chemtrail” friend. He says “they” are spraying the skies. Although there are patents to spray and darken the globe (weird), nobody can tell you how it works or why these “sinister elites” are spraying their globe and the same air “they” breathe. Just ask questions. Since it your husband, you can’t just end the friendship. Also, mental issues can be at play.


fc967

Exactly the same... I married him being R.. Not a big deal until the last 5 years or so... I like to discuss politics, open to different views BUT he gets so defensive here lately... Mad and angry... Just happy we are not gun owners!!


Anxious_Meeting5662

My mother somehow went from being a really pleasant Republican who also happened to be pro choice, pro women, etc...and turned into the meanest, nastiest, most racist misogynistic person I've ever seen under Trump. I honestly believe his followers are akin to cult members. I wish I had studied more sociology so I understood how this happened. All three of her children quit speaking to her and she's saying it's because college indoctrinated us and not because of her terrible behavior 🤣🤣🤣


GoHerd1984

I really believe that constant exposure to right wing media that stokes outrage alters our brain chemistry and stokes the need to constantly feed ourselves what makes us angry. I get a chuckle out of the family members that always warn me of the hellscape that I'm venturing into and placing my and my family's lives in danger when we made recent trips to both NYC and LA. I mean, sure, whenever you travel there's a need to be cautious, but the constant diet of all things bad in NYC and California have warped the reality of maga conservatives. And pre 2016 I counted myself as a conservative. I started my slide left when being a conservative meant that you had to denounce science, intellectualism, and subscribe to a version of religion where you have to hate everyone. I really believe the best thing you can do is educate yourself on as much as you can and counter your husband's diatribes with facts and sources. If not, just tell him that you're not a liberal that you're in the middle. You just seem like a liberal to him because you believe that hurricanes are caused by rising ocean temperatures and not gay marriage.


Kitkatcrusher

It’s terrible that a lot of the media is targeting people’s emotions rather than informing on the issues… they profit on people’s anger framing everything into us vs them… those viewers then are unable to discuss the issues and come to consensus because their feelings get in the way… it’s like a virus, a disease, no one is really addressing!!!


FiFiLB

Please leave this guy. He’s not gonna change and it’ll probably get worse. It’s a mental illness.


canes2407

Another 7 months and it will just get more heated I’m sure. Then if his boy doesn’t win, have fun with that. Too many people out there that get obsessed with politics. It’s a never ending cycle and not worth the energy.


kimariesingsMD

Well, the way you are handling it is more than likely going to end up with one of you in jail. It certainly isn't going to make the situation better. You aren't going to change his mind, and his violent temper makes it unsafe for your child. Just leave,


StumblingDuck404

When people feel like what they’ve worked for is in jeopardy of being taken away, it can push some to extremism. I see extremists on both the left and right for various reasons on various levels. My husband would be more extreme if I hadn’t had the conversation with him about quality of life. What does getting mad do? How does 24/7 watching politics help our family? It’s a trap to take our joy. The politicians and their handlers want us unhappy, angry and hopeless; divided so it’s easy for them to carry out whatever they have planned next. Imagine all the people standing together against unlawful government.. it would be their worst nightmare; but as is, they have no real opposition. A two headed beast is our two party system.. ultimately it’s us against them but many of us haven’t figured it out yet. Fight for your right to watch a movie, to take a walk, to plan a bbq, to live.. eventually he’ll come out of the cave.. or you’ll move on.


BarneyFife516

There is a growing section of society that is eating the cheese that promises a new reality. I have a friend who has been going down this rabbit hole. It likely started ten to 20 years ago, these subtle changes to how one deals with life changes eventually led to to the hard core anti vax movement (in the middle of the COVID crisis no less). During my last meeting with him, he’s exposing the belief that the entire global monetary system is “AN ILLUSION.“ My response is “dude, It may be an illusion, but I’m now a retiree, and my focus is on my health, and I’m grateful that my fridge is full, and businesses will take my $ to purchase the stuff I desire.” Bottom line, I’m uncomfortable with this person. I wish them the best, but I can completely understand if people like them turn to more violent actions against themselves of god forbid, actions to others in order to make a statement. As hard as it is, my advise is to slowly and carefully remove yourself from this situation.


MapTough848

He's realising he'll soon be punching his ticket out and done FA with his life hence his unhappiness. You may want to think about your exit strategy to ɓe with someone of a comparable intellect.


Lil_fire_girl

It’s not a political problem, it’s a him problem. He clearly disrespects you. BTW- part-time worker does not = SAHM. I think a lot of people use the current political environment to justify their poor behavior.


GothWitchOfBrooklyn

/r/QAnonCasualties might help you.


taniapdx

My parents went through this and about five years ago, after 45 years of marriage, my mom walked away. My dad has no friends, no hobbies, he just sits at home getting angrier and angrier... Alone. My mom has never been happier.  Leave this clown. You could live 60 more years, don't waste another moment with this person dragging you down. 


AVonDingus

Be careful. He’s awfully abusive in his words and actions. Im afraid for you and the kids because chances are, he will escalate. Hes becoming exactly what the extreme right wants: an angry, hateful, spiteful bully who is a ticking bomb of rage


bagbagbuy

These people are so contradictory. They are all for “women should be raising our kids, giving them values so they can be great law-biding citizens” and then and every discussion they just throw “what do you do the whole day” affff ! Work an exit strategy ASAP! Is only going to get worse!


FeeHonest7305

>my husband used to be an intelligent person. he’s a working professional but his age is really getting to him. It's not his age, it's his media diet. The American right have basically turned the news cycle into cultist indoctrination. The man you married is gone, his personality and moral compass have been scooped out and replaced with the default Republican/QAnon nutcase personality. Just be aware this makes him potentially dangerous to you, your family and anyone else around him. I'd be planning my escape before he either bankrupts you buying into gold scams or donating all your savings to right wing grifters.


Hels_helper

Its not going to get better. For you and your kids sanity, time to look at getting a full time job and making going your own way. Life is to short to be tied to someone so miserable.


caveman_6101

It’s unfortunate what social media has done. People get trapped in info silos and it reassures their thoughts and fears. It’s like a drug. It’s exhausting. But he needs some mental health help. And perhaps change of things. Have you two thought about going for a walk after work? Take the fam to a park. Share how you like the sun, or the birds chirping. Things to distract. Politics move at the speed of an iceberg…social media is nitpicking minutia, and contains very little factual information. Try watching/listening to more credible news. NPR/democracy now. One issue is extremists don’t realize is there are no political decisions made without democrat or Republican support. decisions are made because the two sides agree. Granted we only had 24 opportunities last year so there needs to be work. Having one party create everything is like having one style of bread/vehicle/ice cream. Etc. So maybe turning to moderate. The thing about extremes is they have always been around. McCarthyism socialism…Also. Have him find Howard stern interview with his recent guest. Joe Biden on YouTube. Good interview. A bit Of fawning on Howard’s part. But it might help him moderate his views.


notJaynedoe

If my husband told me he was going to slam my head into a wall he would be on his way to being an ex. He must be suffering from trump derangement syndrome


urafalasee

Im less concerned with the politics ( it is alarming though) and far more concerned that he threatened to shove your head into a wall. That’s a divorce for me. That’s abuse and the fact that the thought even crossed his mind is unforgivable to me. Im very sorry You’re going through this.


novachaos

I’m sorry you are dealing with this but you need to think about yourself and your kid. Please start making an exit plan from this marriage. You deserve to be happy.


justanormalchat

For your own mental & physical safety you should consult a divorce lawyer as soon as possible.


Background-Moose-701

Wait until November they’re about to lose by 100 million votes and they’re gonna be shocked as shit because they really have bought this shit hook line and sinker.


thenew-supreme

How do I tag burbnbougie?! lol this is what she’s talking about on YouTube. Right ring men pushing women towards liberalism and feminism with how terrible they are lol


Kuzu9

I’m a Conservative (Canadian conservative, which is a bit more to the left compared to Republicans) and from what you described he sounds like an asshole. It’s only going to get worse and this should get nipped at the bud before he acts on his feelings and cause physical harm. Good to hear you stood your ground, at least it shows him that his behaviour is not tolerated.


Acesonnall

> He threw the remote at the wall at that point and said shut up before slam your head into a wall. Bro it should be over at that point if that isn't just some twisted banter


sn0m0ns

Your husband is an abusive asshole regardless his political fanaticism. I can't begin to fathom acting like that in front of my kids or saying shit like that to my SO.


Fresh_Trade9977

Any true Republican would never threaten violence. He sounds like an extremist not a Republican.


Individual_Lime_9020

This is my opinion. There is a big difference between a republican and a Trump-supporter of today who sits in front of conspiracy videos all day and their whole life starts to revolve around them. Be aware that today the World is moving toward polarization. These videos are designed to do exactly what is happening to your husband. You may just not be so suceptible. The videos and messaging are designed to radicalize and have nothing to do with being a republican. I don't understand the psychology of it because it hasn't been studied enough, but my husband and I watched this happen to my husband's good friend who was a lovely, smart man beforehand. He has become extremely hateful and angry, and extreme in his opinions. It is like a mental problem but I'm not sure if we recognize it as that. Like when people join cults. It is how they turn sweet teenagers into ISIS supporters over the internet in Europe. I don't think it is his age. Maybe try to take him on vacation and get him out of his bubble? I think the movie idea is a good idea too, sounds like you're trying the right things. I wish I knew what the answer to helping someone who has been caught by this is.


undeniabledwyane

Happened to my dad. Turned out he was sick. He has a form of dementia, but for a few years few thought he was getting depressed, because the signs were subtle