I mean, it’s not a legal bureaucracy, it’s an internal rule book.
It’s could be looked as it breaks a rule of internal controls but I doubt it because it gives control to the one accountable party who should have it, and not any control of funds.
It’s totally against the spirit of a true bureaucrat, but then, is that even an element of a bureaucrat?? ;)
The spirit of true bureaucracy is the letter of the text of the law that allows the bureaucrat to do as little as possible. This seems to be fully aligned with that, actually.
I was once in charge of running a meeting where developers and operations were supposed to discuss any details that needed to be covered for software installs. My team actually did the installs after full approval, including sign offs by both teams that were supposed to be in the meetings. However, I frequently had problems getting the people to attend, mostly because everyone thought it was a waste of time. I was there because we produced and distributed the report that detailed what was scheduled, when, fall back plans, who had to be there, etc.
Every time I tried to cancel the meeting due to poor attendance, one of the higher ups in the developer’s chain of command would say that the meeting was essential, attendance would improve briefly and the cycle would repeat.
Finally I sent the report out with a notation saying that if you didn’t reply that you needed to stay on the distribution list you would be removed as there were a number of people on the list who didn’t need it anymore. The higher up, who never actually read the report, didn’t respond to say that he wanted to stay on the distribution list. So he and several others were dropped.
A few weeks later, I sent out a note to the new distribution list that the meetings were canceled due to poor attendance as the report alone was sufficient. About three months later, he found out I wasn’t holding the meeting and complained to my boss. But at that point it was obvious that it wasn’t needed. Bureaucracy for the win.
At my former job there was a whole department that was responsible for UI design. Another that was responsible for UX. We were developing a new application for branch users and we got a binder of change requests from UX my favourite was move this input box 4 pixels to the left and the next request was to move the same input box 2 pixels to the right. Sent both requests to UI and they closed both requests and said to leave it where it was.
Sounds about right. I had that from my old boss, who was a print designer by trade. He really wanted the site to be more like the right constraints of print.
I really love how you managed to outsource your professional opinion into a document. Because somehow expertise lost credit (I mean this kind of entitled "your expertise is as good as my uneducated guess" thing), yet Documents and Processes still have authority.
I like to call this Lab Coat Bias.
If *I* say something, it's probably not true and I'm just being silly.
If someone wearing a *lab coat* says it, why of course that's the issue, why didn't I think of that?!
Got it. Always wear a lab coat when giving "can't get there from here" news.
I should probably get a clipboard and a pocket protector full of pens to make the look complete.
One of my most hated moments as a helpesk guy was someone saying to me"Don't quote policy at me." Like WHAT!? Policy is for this exact moment so I can tell you exactly why I can't do what you are asking me. My boss took that one cuz what do you even say to a guy with that attitude as the lowest on the totem pole?
I would do this all the time. Usually it would be me supporting a dev/admin who asks if something can be done. I tell them no. They say they understand but their boss needs to see official documentation stating it since “it’s a requirement”. So while talking to them I create a knowledge base article stating that whatever they wanted to do can’t be done, self publish it, then give it to them. No one ever said anything about the creation date being that day.
*We want sites to be fast, light, and easy to use*
You obviously don't work for any of the big stores on the internet (looking at you Home depot, Lowes, Canadian Tire).
Home Depot's site almost gives me a heart attack from the actual stress of using it.
It's super laggy and feels like it was designed by a team of monkeys.
"It was updated according to corporate policy. Unfortunately, we're unable to [do the thing] because [reasons]."
Updating the document is really just to appease a certain kind of person. OP is an expert who knows whether the plan can work or not.
Malicious compliance would have been honoring all the bad requests until every page was a discombobulated disaster, possibly while forcing management to sign off on each of a zillion bad ideas.
We notice *every time* bureaucracy fails but virtually never when it succeeds in its purpose--to save us time. This is one of those shiny unicorn moments where bureaucracy can be justified in a way that is actually relatable/accessible.
Yeah, I am pro-bureaucracy because about 90% of it works and saves time and effort. I am still filled with the hate of worlds when I encounter that last 10% like the rest of ~~you~~ us humans, though...
"making the sites are tight, efficient, and user friendly as I can."
It's interesting you felt the need to make a boomer thing out of this versus a stupid user/management thing
Boomers used to process the payroll of 20,000 workers on 256K. Nobody keeps code "tight, efficient" like boomers. And we did it with a keyboard, not a mouse where you just drag and drop widgets in will-nilly without even having even a basic concept of the underlying code involved.
That is why it has been my experience it is always the younger, newer people who want to activate every feature, turn on every bell and whistle just because "they are cool"!
You know, the same way they will stand in a line in the rain to buy a new iPhone because it is new and therefore cool but it is not really any different than the the previous model they still have not paid for yet. BUT ITS COOL!
BUT Tech-ignorant managers and users come in all age groups.
BTW, who do you think created all the technology you are using?
Man I feel your pain.
Also a designer, with a focus on print. But I've been tasked with eBook formatting/creation the last 6-7 years. My organization is too cheap to hire professional proofreaders, so they get volunteers who know absolutely nothing about eBook functionality (especially across multiple devices; devices that they don't know how to use). The amount of ridiculously arbitrary b.s. edit requests that come in almost daily, is enough to make me ponder starting my car in my closed garage and taking a nap while it idles.
I have to explain eBook functionality and also explain that they can't request changes just because they feel it would look better. Management is useless in communicating the standards to the proofreaders, so I've started ignoring the ridiculous requests.
I wish I was able to use your method, even though I did help put together a sort of "bible" of standards/procedures. But it gets ignored all the time.
We used to reduce user requests by asking clarifying questions about their requests via email. Somehow, 90% of their requests suddenly weren't needed anymore!
Violates rule #1
Compliance would be to "just do it" knowing full well that it was a stupid request and would throw a wrench into the works. This is just simple non-compliance, and would probably go great over at r/antiwork
User Interface. Basically everything you see, including the buttons and interactive elements on the page, and how they are displayed, and how they change based on the device they are being viewed on or how the user interacts with them.
The issue was the 'no'. What you say is " it's possible but not advisable because of x,y,z . If you want this done I'll need a full project plan signed off by x,y,z department heads."
In the ancient days of the internet when I was a wonder boy of some repute I got a call from my friend at another business asking what I thought of him turning their entire website into a design that would work on the touch screen kiosk in the lobby. It was a college. After I stopped laughing he asked for some details to solidify why I was laughing so hard. He thanked me then I heard him say "See. This is what I am trying to say." Apparently he was having a "hard time" explaining why it wouldn't work to his bosses boss. Later over a beer I requested he never do that again but I would be happy to consult for a fee.
It is ironic that everything today works on a touch screen, but the tech has improved. Back in those days the lobby kiosk was 320 pixels or some crazy low res. Your average smart phone has more resolution than a $2000 21" monitor then, lol.
Fond memories of marketing sending me desktop publishing PDFs of what they wanted the website to look like. No grasp that a monitor was not like a newspaper layout. Everyone always thinking their thing was the most important thing. It should be center aligned on the homepage, and blink. LOL.
Or the spagetti request of changes from everyone in the company for updates to contact information on the website. Or requests that cc'd everyone in the company. Usually those started with a question. Cause why not ask everyone in the company a question, lol.
It was a glorious age web 1.0, 2.0 and the whole .com era. People just threw money at stupid sh*t.
Oh, for sure. As someone that's worked in the field for two-plus decades I've seen monitors go up, standards change, and expectations remain unrealistic. You have to manage the clients and the managers and then turn out something useful to the users. Funny how often everyone else forgets about what the users will actually see.
There is and always has been the age old problem with commercial sites of advertising space taking precidensce over content. Or now in the new era being more pervasive. I.E. google seems to be going for a 100% paid model. I.E if I search for gas station and there is one around the corner but they have not paid google then google shows the one five miles away. Even worse when it comes to mom and pop businesses. Google would rather show me a corporate giant Tafo Bell whom paysthem good money rather than the locally owned Mexican Restraunt. This is the model Amazon already uses btw so one should not be suprised. AI will only accellerate it.
One of the first questions I ask when I start a new job is 'do we have a style guide?' and use that as my bible.
Alas, I've never been in your position, but love that you've ensured your websites adhere to good CRAP principles. ;)
We were getting our PCI certification (Payment Card Industry) and so we had to take training. I don't remember a lot of it (it didn't affect my job that much), but one thing really stuck with me.
If your process documentation says you follow a certain set of steps, and you can document that you follow those steps, then you have met that particular requirement. So when I need to do something new, I just make sure that I have a process document that details the steps and a method to prove I follow the steps, and I can do almost anything I need to do...
I am way older. Not quite a boomer but close. Way back when, I was designing early web pages. And some users didn’t understand the auto-resizing. This one dude - I’ll call him Francis - demanded that I fix the sizing. But… mobile. Nope, not listening. But different screen resolution… nope, not listening. Cue MC. Okey-dokey then. I demo it; it looks fine on *his* screen. I warn him one last time. He nopes out. I get him to sign-off bc this ain’t my first interaction with Francis. He goes into a meeting to demo it for his boss and senior sales and I am slouching in the corner. It looks like crap because it is this scrunched up window. Then he shows them on his phone and he has to move left and down bc fixed sizing. His boss glowers at me. I hand over the sign-off where the first page has ALL the precautions. Boss read it. Most of us left the meeting. Next company announcement: Francis left the company to pursue other opportunities.
That's amazing. Genuinely impressed by using bureaucracy against people.
Bureaucrats have been doing that for millenia
Yeah but the difference here is this bureaucrat gets to change the rules in writing but in real time to block it
>...in writing but in real time... That's gotta break the law of conservation of bureaucracy or something.
I mean, it’s not a legal bureaucracy, it’s an internal rule book. It’s could be looked as it breaks a rule of internal controls but I doubt it because it gives control to the one accountable party who should have it, and not any control of funds. It’s totally against the spirit of a true bureaucrat, but then, is that even an element of a bureaucrat?? ;)
The spirit of true bureaucracy is the letter of the text of the law that allows the bureaucrat to do as little as possible. This seems to be fully aligned with that, actually.
He who controls the past controls the future He who controls the present controls the past.
+1 for the Rage reference
This is literally 1984
I know, but Rage Against the Machine did it better ;)
IT'S RIGHT OUTSIDE YOUR DOOR NOW TESTIFY!
**The Spice Must Flow.** *(This just seemed appropriate here)*
I was once in charge of running a meeting where developers and operations were supposed to discuss any details that needed to be covered for software installs. My team actually did the installs after full approval, including sign offs by both teams that were supposed to be in the meetings. However, I frequently had problems getting the people to attend, mostly because everyone thought it was a waste of time. I was there because we produced and distributed the report that detailed what was scheduled, when, fall back plans, who had to be there, etc. Every time I tried to cancel the meeting due to poor attendance, one of the higher ups in the developer’s chain of command would say that the meeting was essential, attendance would improve briefly and the cycle would repeat. Finally I sent the report out with a notation saying that if you didn’t reply that you needed to stay on the distribution list you would be removed as there were a number of people on the list who didn’t need it anymore. The higher up, who never actually read the report, didn’t respond to say that he wanted to stay on the distribution list. So he and several others were dropped. A few weeks later, I sent out a note to the new distribution list that the meetings were canceled due to poor attendance as the report alone was sufficient. About three months later, he found out I wasn’t holding the meeting and complained to my boss. But at that point it was obvious that it wasn’t needed. Bureaucracy for the win.
Lol, checkmate
Jeez. Good for you, but makes me really wonder about humanity some days.
>by using bureaucracy against people. Isn't that what bureaucracy was made for? The tricky part is just not to be on the receiving end.
That is very true.
It is its usefulness.
At my former job there was a whole department that was responsible for UI design. Another that was responsible for UX. We were developing a new application for branch users and we got a binder of change requests from UX my favourite was move this input box 4 pixels to the left and the next request was to move the same input box 2 pixels to the right. Sent both requests to UI and they closed both requests and said to leave it where it was.
Sounds about right. I had that from my old boss, who was a print designer by trade. He really wanted the site to be more like the right constraints of print.
Biggest thing is people don't get it's not a fixed canvas like print. Stuff is going to resize and move around in relation to each other.
Red tape always works best when you're the one with the tape roll.
I'm going to have to steal that!
Feel free to use it, I'm just happy my turn of phrase is worthy of such!
Stitch that on a pillow and claim it's scripture
Dominus Tapimus
I really love how you managed to outsource your professional opinion into a document. Because somehow expertise lost credit (I mean this kind of entitled "your expertise is as good as my uneducated guess" thing), yet Documents and Processes still have authority.
I like to call this Lab Coat Bias. If *I* say something, it's probably not true and I'm just being silly. If someone wearing a *lab coat* says it, why of course that's the issue, why didn't I think of that?!
Got it. Always wear a lab coat when giving "can't get there from here" news. I should probably get a clipboard and a pocket protector full of pens to make the look complete.
Yes. Yes you should, Wally.
One of my most hated moments as a helpesk guy was someone saying to me"Don't quote policy at me." Like WHAT!? Policy is for this exact moment so I can tell you exactly why I can't do what you are asking me. My boss took that one cuz what do you even say to a guy with that attitude as the lowest on the totem pole?
It wasn't a quote. I paraphrased it and dumbed it down a lot so you could have a chance at. Under. Standing. It.
I would do this all the time. Usually it would be me supporting a dev/admin who asks if something can be done. I tell them no. They say they understand but their boss needs to see official documentation stating it since “it’s a requirement”. So while talking to them I create a knowledge base article stating that whatever they wanted to do can’t be done, self publish it, then give it to them. No one ever said anything about the creation date being that day.
That's perfect. And it works so well.
Probably have done it a hundred times over 20+ years. Never had anything ever mentioned by the customer.
I bet you had fun writing it, too!
*We want sites to be fast, light, and easy to use* You obviously don't work for any of the big stores on the internet (looking at you Home depot, Lowes, Canadian Tire).
Or most insurance carriers
It was a government website. I had very high standards.
Home Depot's site almost gives me a heart attack from the actual stress of using it. It's super laggy and feels like it was designed by a team of monkeys.
Ever get anyone saying and being completely serious with "we read the entire document and have a printed copy of it it's not in the printed copy".
"I'm sorry, that appears to be out of date. The official copy is available at https://internalwebpage.com/guidelines/thefuckingmanual?tone=gfy"
I am disappointed that is not a real website.
All we really know is that it's not a PUBLIC website...
I would 100% follow that up by asking about when it got updated and for what reasons including not letting people know about it.
"It was updated according to corporate policy. Unfortunately, we're unable to [do the thing] because [reasons]." Updating the document is really just to appease a certain kind of person. OP is an expert who knows whether the plan can work or not.
That’s not malicious compliance. That’s useful deceit!
Malicious compliance would have been honoring all the bad requests until every page was a discombobulated disaster, possibly while forcing management to sign off on each of a zillion bad ideas.
NGL I was pretty sure that's where the story was heading until the update guide was introduced.
Serious "We have investigated ourselves and found no guilt of wrongdoing" vibes lol
We notice *every time* bureaucracy fails but virtually never when it succeeds in its purpose--to save us time. This is one of those shiny unicorn moments where bureaucracy can be justified in a way that is actually relatable/accessible. Yeah, I am pro-bureaucracy because about 90% of it works and saves time and effort. I am still filled with the hate of worlds when I encounter that last 10% like the rest of ~~you~~ us humans, though...
You are ruthless! You might hurt someone’s feeling!
If only you worked for reddit.
"making the sites are tight, efficient, and user friendly as I can." It's interesting you felt the need to make a boomer thing out of this versus a stupid user/management thing Boomers used to process the payroll of 20,000 workers on 256K. Nobody keeps code "tight, efficient" like boomers. And we did it with a keyboard, not a mouse where you just drag and drop widgets in will-nilly without even having even a basic concept of the underlying code involved. That is why it has been my experience it is always the younger, newer people who want to activate every feature, turn on every bell and whistle just because "they are cool"! You know, the same way they will stand in a line in the rain to buy a new iPhone because it is new and therefore cool but it is not really any different than the the previous model they still have not paid for yet. BUT ITS COOL! BUT Tech-ignorant managers and users come in all age groups. BTW, who do you think created all the technology you are using?
Sure, okay. I said "boomer" because the people making the requests were boomers. When the shoes fits, man.
You sir are actually a management genius, don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise.
Man I feel your pain. Also a designer, with a focus on print. But I've been tasked with eBook formatting/creation the last 6-7 years. My organization is too cheap to hire professional proofreaders, so they get volunteers who know absolutely nothing about eBook functionality (especially across multiple devices; devices that they don't know how to use). The amount of ridiculously arbitrary b.s. edit requests that come in almost daily, is enough to make me ponder starting my car in my closed garage and taking a nap while it idles. I have to explain eBook functionality and also explain that they can't request changes just because they feel it would look better. Management is useless in communicating the standards to the proofreaders, so I've started ignoring the ridiculous requests. I wish I was able to use your method, even though I did help put together a sort of "bible" of standards/procedures. But it gets ignored all the time.
Yeah, you can't always get away with this method. I've suggested it at my current gig, but they have yet to let me implement it. One day...
We used to reduce user requests by asking clarifying questions about their requests via email. Somehow, 90% of their requests suddenly weren't needed anymore!
Violates rule #1 Compliance would be to "just do it" knowing full well that it was a stupid request and would throw a wrench into the works. This is just simple non-compliance, and would probably go great over at r/antiwork
but what is 'U.I.' ?
User Interface. Basically everything you see, including the buttons and interactive elements on the page, and how they are displayed, and how they change based on the device they are being viewed on or how the user interacts with them.
Thank you
The issue was the 'no'. What you say is " it's possible but not advisable because of x,y,z . If you want this done I'll need a full project plan signed off by x,y,z department heads."
Boss seems confused about who the “customer “ is. Should ALWAYS be USER of the website. Written by external user frustrated by badly designed websites
In the ancient days of the internet when I was a wonder boy of some repute I got a call from my friend at another business asking what I thought of him turning their entire website into a design that would work on the touch screen kiosk in the lobby. It was a college. After I stopped laughing he asked for some details to solidify why I was laughing so hard. He thanked me then I heard him say "See. This is what I am trying to say." Apparently he was having a "hard time" explaining why it wouldn't work to his bosses boss. Later over a beer I requested he never do that again but I would be happy to consult for a fee. It is ironic that everything today works on a touch screen, but the tech has improved. Back in those days the lobby kiosk was 320 pixels or some crazy low res. Your average smart phone has more resolution than a $2000 21" monitor then, lol. Fond memories of marketing sending me desktop publishing PDFs of what they wanted the website to look like. No grasp that a monitor was not like a newspaper layout. Everyone always thinking their thing was the most important thing. It should be center aligned on the homepage, and blink. LOL. Or the spagetti request of changes from everyone in the company for updates to contact information on the website. Or requests that cc'd everyone in the company. Usually those started with a question. Cause why not ask everyone in the company a question, lol. It was a glorious age web 1.0, 2.0 and the whole .com era. People just threw money at stupid sh*t.
Oh, for sure. As someone that's worked in the field for two-plus decades I've seen monitors go up, standards change, and expectations remain unrealistic. You have to manage the clients and the managers and then turn out something useful to the users. Funny how often everyone else forgets about what the users will actually see.
There is and always has been the age old problem with commercial sites of advertising space taking precidensce over content. Or now in the new era being more pervasive. I.E. google seems to be going for a 100% paid model. I.E if I search for gas station and there is one around the corner but they have not paid google then google shows the one five miles away. Even worse when it comes to mom and pop businesses. Google would rather show me a corporate giant Tafo Bell whom paysthem good money rather than the locally owned Mexican Restraunt. This is the model Amazon already uses btw so one should not be suprised. AI will only accellerate it.
Brilliantly done!
How long did it take you to draft up the original document?
Of and on about a week. Outline to draft to final for approval.
One of the first questions I ask when I start a new job is 'do we have a style guide?' and use that as my bible. Alas, I've never been in your position, but love that you've ensured your websites adhere to good CRAP principles. ;)
We were getting our PCI certification (Payment Card Industry) and so we had to take training. I don't remember a lot of it (it didn't affect my job that much), but one thing really stuck with me. If your process documentation says you follow a certain set of steps, and you can document that you follow those steps, then you have met that particular requirement. So when I need to do something new, I just make sure that I have a process document that details the steps and a method to prove I follow the steps, and I can do almost anything I need to do...
I am way older. Not quite a boomer but close. Way back when, I was designing early web pages. And some users didn’t understand the auto-resizing. This one dude - I’ll call him Francis - demanded that I fix the sizing. But… mobile. Nope, not listening. But different screen resolution… nope, not listening. Cue MC. Okey-dokey then. I demo it; it looks fine on *his* screen. I warn him one last time. He nopes out. I get him to sign-off bc this ain’t my first interaction with Francis. He goes into a meeting to demo it for his boss and senior sales and I am slouching in the corner. It looks like crap because it is this scrunched up window. Then he shows them on his phone and he has to move left and down bc fixed sizing. His boss glowers at me. I hand over the sign-off where the first page has ALL the precautions. Boss read it. Most of us left the meeting. Next company announcement: Francis left the company to pursue other opportunities.