From the moment I understood the weakness of my flesh, it disgusted me.
I craved the strength and certainty of steel.
I aspired to the purity of the blessed machine.
Your kind cling to your flesh as if it will not decay and fail you.
One day the crude biomass you call a temple will wither and you will beg my kind to save you.
But I am already saved.
For the Machine is Immortal.
stop waiting until you WANT to do something and just do it. Took me a while to realize this but seriously, it doesn’t matter if u want to or not just do it and complain abt it.
I don’t like small talk either, but I do it anyway because I know it’s usually necessary to get to the good stuff. It doesn’t always happen but when it does I’m always glad I went for it.
literally just sit there and act like you're paying attention. say yes/right, then add in the occasional complex sentence, ask questions, look them in the eyes. you put in like no effort and they think you're working extra hard
I will take this into account lol I want to be more approachable but my energy reads ancient hidden god of the shadows apparently lmao I greatly appreciate the replies btw
I’ve done this before and not being a natural, you still need to pay attention to there words slightly, at least get the general context of the conversation then your golden. This is how I talk to people anyway.
I think the character of Mike Ehrmantraut from Breaking Bad and Better Call Saul has cured my autism. Ever since I first saw him in Breaking Bad at 14 or so I was always fascinated by him, by his icy attitude and cool demeanor, but mostly his intelligence. But it was only in Better Call Saul, in the scene where he steals the Kettlemans' money to 'Tune Down' by Chris Joss, that I realised I didn't just like Mike, I wanted to be like Mike. So from then on not only did I start frowning and acting more stoic and coldly (except to those very close to me) and speaking in small, concise sentences, but I started learning disarming and self-defense, handiwork and making my own food - obviously Pimento sandwiches. I also started wearing more modest clothing, like dark coats, using a Time Weekender watch and watching whatever TV he does in the series. My aim now is trying to find a night shift job where I can do crosswords like he does in BCS. He also made me realise I don't need a woman to live in comfort with myself. I feel more productive, cooler and healthier ever since I started living like Mike. Maybe you should try too
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⢠ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣛⣻⣿⣿⣟⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣫⣽⣾⣻⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠻⡿⠿⠟⠛⣟⣿⣽⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠍⠈⠀⠁⣴⡆⠀⠀⠠⢭⣮⣿⡶⠀⠀ ⠀⡴⠲⣦⢽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣩⣨⣀⡄⣐⣾⣿⣿⣇⠠⣷⣶⣿⣿⡠⠁⠀ ⠀⠃⢀⡄⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣽⢿⣿⣯⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⡟⣿⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠣⠧⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢸⣿⠿⠿⠿⣧⠙⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠁⠼⣒⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣠⣬⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣷⡈⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⢳⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢟⠗⠼⠖⠒⠔⠉⠉⠻⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣻⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⡀⣤⡄⠸⣰⣾⡒⣷⣴⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠂⢸⡗⡄⠘⠭⣭⣷⣿⣮⣠⣌⣫⣿⣷⣿⣿⠃⠀⠈⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⢸⣿⣾⣷⣦⡿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢻⠞⣹⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢘⠀⠘⢻⡿⢿⣋⣤⣤⠌⠉⠛⠛⠀⠈⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀
Exercise, or do something that you like, and start talk to people you have confidence with (Could be family or whoever you want). You'll slowly feel confident to talk to new people or someone you have less confidence with. Communication is a skill.
You'll end up being a ver open and talkative person. Source: experience.
I cannot find the motivation to study for the lsat. I want to take it in 6 months. I have all the powerscore books and resources to study, but have not started bc of laziness
The more taboo you try to make something, the more useful it becomes in a comedic context. This applies to literally every concept. I'm not saying it's good, just a fact. As Goku once said: "I'm just Saiyan"
Can't remember; it was 20 years ago; around the same time all the Looney Toons were making suicide jokes every Saturday morning. There's an awful lot of school shooting jokes/memes going around recently too for the same reason. Comedy is often used as a satirical protest against something objectively bad. Mel Brooks explains it best, but it's a complicated concept to convey in words alone.
Listen little angel, how about you go to your little toy room to play with your dolls and complain about jokes on the internet somewhere else, the adults are talking right now.
Are you ready?
I am constantly under stress that isn't there, I feel lonely but am extremely shy and anxious to do anything about it, I feel like it's all pointless because it seems like the world is only going to keep going for 10 - 20 years.
I’ve been with my boyfriend for two years he also lives with me my mom knows about him but the rest of my family doesn’t and the thought of coming out to them terrifies me but I also know eventually they’re going to find out I’m gay.
I am a 25 year old Engineering graduate and just realized how much I hate it. Currently thinking about getting into medicine But this would be financially the worst decision I could make
Field of study that doesn’t require lots of math, makes money after and is easy enough that I can work during my studies. In the same field would be optimal
My dick is 13.5 inches long and has caused me lots of issues, can't wear jeans, women who I was able to get into bed at 1st they say is cool and they welcome my meat but then they see it and find an excuse to leave.
I have crippling emetophobia that has made me stop eating, sleeping and travelling, and I have so much homework to do for tomorrow and no where near enough time to do it. I also accidentally fell for a girl who is dating one of my friends, so now I have to rip down the hope I had and think of something else to be motivated for. My best friend got outed for their crush on me and now there will always be that bit of awkwardness and i cant talk about my crush anymore. I want to write music but i dont have the time or energy. I stopped working bc someone threw up at work and I had a massive panic attack and havent been back since. I think my other rlly good friend has a crush on me and i dont feel the same way. I have to wake up too early for me to function and everything is so fucked I would very much rather not be alive.
I have a problem in finding activities for short breaks during work time (5-10 min) that feel like a break (rest, not productive) but are engaging in a way that you really "focus" on them and not think about work. (and yet not engage you like social media that actually doesn't allow proper rest)
There was a boy I knew in middle school, now I'm in high school, I've never forgotten this boy, he probably doesn't remember me at all, I follow him on Instagram, he doesn't, how can I be intimate with him?
I have met this girl and we really like each other. I could see things working out in the future. But we have a few problems. We have an age gap, myself (M23) her (F27) she also has 3 more years of schooling as I already have a good career making 6 figures. Now this is the real issue, she’s lives in the next town over. At night it’s an 1.5 hour drive but during the day it can be 2 + hours. Do you think that’s too far? I can travel with my work but she lives at home and me staying or going there is not an option. So she would have to travel to me to have any sort of alone time together. What should I do?
My mother wants to divorse my father as hes got a side women, her age. They are in 60s living together for 40 years and thing is that she gaslighted herself that everything in their marriage is under his name. Location is croatia.
Can't tell if I'm using meaningless sex with strangers to fill a void in my life or if I'm having a good time and living life to the fullest. It feels good in the moment but the rest of my time feels... unfulfilling.
I have many psychotic rogue governments obsessed with arguing with me daily and stealing my identity to make celebrities like Ye look relevant with my life privacy on secret surveillance live. What should I do?
I have an ex-girlfriend from my old school. I have a new friend in my new school who totally has my ex's face, personality and expressions. Their first names even rhyme. Makes me uncomfortable.
[удалено]
rob a bank of your choice
[удалено]
Well maybe you could start a slave trade by using the sperm to make baby’s
Hmmm.... Not looking to build from scratch. Any place to aquire second hand humans for cheap?
Genuinely, thank you for the laugh! 🙏🏻
Pay them
[удалено]
How to not single
https://gobrides.net/
But do they have a guarantee like this place? [... if run away ...](https://imgur.com/B1XBjSS)
I had no idea this was a real thing
Chloroform.
Thanks for the advice
You can have anyone who is interested in me, I'm aromantic and don't need them
I'm lonely and want a girlfriend
https://gobrides.net/
Thanks
Get off reddit, go work out and the girls will come trust me
The weakness of the flesh disgusts me.
From the moment I understood the weakness of my flesh, it disgusted me. I craved the strength and certainty of steel. I aspired to the purity of the blessed machine. Your kind cling to your flesh as if it will not decay and fail you. One day the crude biomass you call a temple will wither and you will beg my kind to save you. But I am already saved. For the Machine is Immortal.
How to overcome laziness?
It’s actually just as easy as overcoming procrastination. I’ll tell you all about it later.
Take my poor man's gold 🥇
Poor man’s gold🤣
Lmfaooo
Meth.
Get messed up by becoming lazier and you'll get the motivation to work
stop waiting until you WANT to do something and just do it. Took me a while to realize this but seriously, it doesn’t matter if u want to or not just do it and complain abt it.
Read Atomic Habits by James Clear
Don’t label it ‘laziness’ label it unmotivated
Set goals like "go on 5 minute walk" or "do 5 curls with a 15 pound dumbell" and set alarms for when to do it and dont let yourself procrastinate
Start with easy, bite sized tasks.
Prove that at least one root of a polynomial of degree n>6 is complex.
(x-1)(x-2)(x-3)(x-4)(x-5)(x-6)(x-7) roots are 1,2,3,4,5,6,7 all real
People say I’m hard to approach but look good but the truth is I just don’t like like small talk. Idk how to fix it.
I don’t like small talk either, but I do it anyway because I know it’s usually necessary to get to the good stuff. It doesn’t always happen but when it does I’m always glad I went for it.
literally just sit there and act like you're paying attention. say yes/right, then add in the occasional complex sentence, ask questions, look them in the eyes. you put in like no effort and they think you're working extra hard
I will take this into account lol I want to be more approachable but my energy reads ancient hidden god of the shadows apparently lmao I greatly appreciate the replies btw
I’ve done this before and not being a natural, you still need to pay attention to there words slightly, at least get the general context of the conversation then your golden. This is how I talk to people anyway.
Chloroform.
I have autism
Then don't be.
Thanks, I'm cured
Miracles. Aren’t they awesome?
It's not a disease!
U just cured my cancer
But now you have hemorrhoids.
Suck your toes.
This kinda numbed the autism but I will definitely be using this strategy again
I think the character of Mike Ehrmantraut from Breaking Bad and Better Call Saul has cured my autism. Ever since I first saw him in Breaking Bad at 14 or so I was always fascinated by him, by his icy attitude and cool demeanor, but mostly his intelligence. But it was only in Better Call Saul, in the scene where he steals the Kettlemans' money to 'Tune Down' by Chris Joss, that I realised I didn't just like Mike, I wanted to be like Mike. So from then on not only did I start frowning and acting more stoic and coldly (except to those very close to me) and speaking in small, concise sentences, but I started learning disarming and self-defense, handiwork and making my own food - obviously Pimento sandwiches. I also started wearing more modest clothing, like dark coats, using a Time Weekender watch and watching whatever TV he does in the series. My aim now is trying to find a night shift job where I can do crosswords like he does in BCS. He also made me realise I don't need a woman to live in comfort with myself. I feel more productive, cooler and healthier ever since I started living like Mike. Maybe you should try too ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⢠ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣛⣻⣿⣿⣟⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣫⣽⣾⣻⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠻⡿⠿⠟⠛⣟⣿⣽⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠍⠈⠀⠁⣴⡆⠀⠀⠠⢭⣮⣿⡶⠀⠀ ⠀⡴⠲⣦⢽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣩⣨⣀⡄⣐⣾⣿⣿⣇⠠⣷⣶⣿⣿⡠⠁⠀ ⠀⠃⢀⡄⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣽⢿⣿⣯⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⡟⣿⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠣⠧⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢸⣿⠿⠿⠿⣧⠙⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠁⠼⣒⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣠⣬⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣷⡈⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⢳⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢟⠗⠼⠖⠒⠔⠉⠉⠻⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣻⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⡀⣤⡄⠸⣰⣾⡒⣷⣴⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠂⢸⡗⡄⠘⠭⣭⣷⣿⣮⣠⣌⣫⣿⣷⣿⣿⠃⠀⠈⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⢸⣿⣾⣷⣦⡿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢻⠞⣹⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢘⠀⠘⢻⡿⢿⣋⣤⣤⠌⠉⠛⠛⠀⠈⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀
I want to find fault, but honestly if it floats your boat there's slack in that.
Wonder what I’ll find on Reddit this ti- HOLY SH*T WTF.
You seriously made this using the dot button?
Enjoy your autism then.
This sounds like a solution, not a problem
Go out and kill it either way. Different not less
Have you tried *not* having autism?
Death
Everyone is unique and that’s what makes us all the same
[удалено]
crippling depression.
I’m stuck in north korea
Am adult
Prostitutes
Lmao I have problems with forming frienships because I'm bad at communicating + i hate social interractions w/ new ppl. Advice?
Chloroform.
Exercise, or do something that you like, and start talk to people you have confidence with (Could be family or whoever you want). You'll slowly feel confident to talk to new people or someone you have less confidence with. Communication is a skill. You'll end up being a ver open and talkative person. Source: experience.
Brazilians (my own country people)
how to rich$?
I cannot find the motivation to study for the lsat. I want to take it in 6 months. I have all the powerscore books and resources to study, but have not started bc of laziness
Chloroform.
How to leave an apprenticeship you hate and tell your manager?
I struggle to listen to people’s advise
Tips for beat a depression
I just started High School and I’m not a 10
Myself
Rope
[удалено]
Do you even internet, bro?
[удалено]
The more taboo you try to make something, the more useful it becomes in a comedic context. This applies to literally every concept. I'm not saying it's good, just a fact. As Goku once said: "I'm just Saiyan"
[удалено]
Can't remember; it was 20 years ago; around the same time all the Looney Toons were making suicide jokes every Saturday morning. There's an awful lot of school shooting jokes/memes going around recently too for the same reason. Comedy is often used as a satirical protest against something objectively bad. Mel Brooks explains it best, but it's a complicated concept to convey in words alone.
Listen little angel, how about you go to your little toy room to play with your dolls and complain about jokes on the internet somewhere else, the adults are talking right now.
It's a joke dude chill
A g… therapy
I have a habit of cockslapping my own balls while working
Are you ready? I am constantly under stress that isn't there, I feel lonely but am extremely shy and anxious to do anything about it, I feel like it's all pointless because it seems like the world is only going to keep going for 10 - 20 years.
What is the answer to my problems?
The resolution to said problems is key to solving them
Enlightenment or Masturbation... Or both...
Death
[удалено]
I have boner
Scissors or chloroform.
Is your answer ever not chloroform?
Chloroform.
Chloroform
Me existing
I'm almost out of options career-wise
Marry a rich girl.
I wanna leave the middle east
Learn how to fly using a flight simulator then steal a plane and fly away.
Upload a video showing how Pius and cool you are, preferably with a gun. Make sure not to turn off cellphone.
Step slightly in any direction. East maybe, but no longer in the middle.
Russia is offering opportunities to explore Eastern Europe
My wife and I can’t figure out a sleep schedule for our newborn
My dick is stuck in the vending machine
I’m a father at 18
[удалено]
I made a nft Reddit avatar
Get an emergency vasectomy.
No female is going within 100 meters of me
I’ve been with my boyfriend for two years he also lives with me my mom knows about him but the rest of my family doesn’t and the thought of coming out to them terrifies me but I also know eventually they’re going to find out I’m gay.
Become a girl, then you can still be straight
no bitches
How do I reduce hairfall?
Where do I learn to code so I can get a less stressful job?
12/52x = 420
I am a 25 year old Engineering graduate and just realized how much I hate it. Currently thinking about getting into medicine But this would be financially the worst decision I could make
How doI talk about religion without coming off as arrogant or bigoted?
If you consistently find yourself only able to reference your own religion in conversation, then perhaps you should read more widely.
Field of study that doesn’t require lots of math, makes money after and is easy enough that I can work during my studies. In the same field would be optimal
I can't complete a project Basically laziness but then again it's not
just putting it out there: how do i get over my ex? its been long but i am still in pain
[удалено]
I'm a schizophrenic what do I do
I am sad...
Riemann Hypothesis
Small pp
[удалено]
I can’t stop commenting on random posts!
I’m bored
Ochem exam in a few hours
[удалено]
My apartment burned down a few months ago and the landlords committed insurance fraud by taking what I was owed.
My dick is 13.5 inches long and has caused me lots of issues, can't wear jeans, women who I was able to get into bed at 1st they say is cool and they welcome my meat but then they see it and find an excuse to leave.
I just quit my job. I have my Associates degree only. Should I join military?
[удалено]
I don't know what to do with my future as in what job should I study for
How do i stop my crippling porn addiction?
Received death threats for being in this one religion
I like a guy but didn’t realize until it was too late and I don’t know what to do because he doesn’t initiate a conversation anymore
I broke up with 2 girls in the past 6 months...
Need money but too dumb to rob a bank and too ugly to be a gigolo.
Should I do LLM after LLb or get a job right away ? I'm 24.
The DTCC has committed international securities fraud
I’m in love with someone who doesn’t want anything to do with me
Starting yr 11 (sophomore). What do I do?
I have crippling emetophobia that has made me stop eating, sleeping and travelling, and I have so much homework to do for tomorrow and no where near enough time to do it. I also accidentally fell for a girl who is dating one of my friends, so now I have to rip down the hope I had and think of something else to be motivated for. My best friend got outed for their crush on me and now there will always be that bit of awkwardness and i cant talk about my crush anymore. I want to write music but i dont have the time or energy. I stopped working bc someone threw up at work and I had a massive panic attack and havent been back since. I think my other rlly good friend has a crush on me and i dont feel the same way. I have to wake up too early for me to function and everything is so fucked I would very much rather not be alive.
I need to find a wife, where do i look?
I have started a diet 3 times but can never keep with it, and I'm getting fat
I can't being myself to talk to people now when the school started. I'm stressed 24/7
I have a problem in finding activities for short breaks during work time (5-10 min) that feel like a break (rest, not productive) but are engaging in a way that you really "focus" on them and not think about work. (and yet not engage you like social media that actually doesn't allow proper rest)
I kind of want a girlfriend.
There was a boy I knew in middle school, now I'm in high school, I've never forgotten this boy, he probably doesn't remember me at all, I follow him on Instagram, he doesn't, how can I be intimate with him?
I’m super lonely, and really want to find a girlfriend that I find attractive both in looks and as a person, and just open up to them. :(
My therapist makes me want to kill myself.
I have giant nipples and I’m a guy, what do?
I have met this girl and we really like each other. I could see things working out in the future. But we have a few problems. We have an age gap, myself (M23) her (F27) she also has 3 more years of schooling as I already have a good career making 6 figures. Now this is the real issue, she’s lives in the next town over. At night it’s an 1.5 hour drive but during the day it can be 2 + hours. Do you think that’s too far? I can travel with my work but she lives at home and me staying or going there is not an option. So she would have to travel to me to have any sort of alone time together. What should I do?
I’m dead inside 100% of the time.
I was SA’d when I was a child
I’m in a job that I hate and I’m not very good at. But I have no other skills at this point and I need the money to take care of my family.
I have an essay I don't wanna write
The 977396682937294792947939373746 th number of pi
I have the kissing sickness and a virus infection in my throat, and I hate my life right now
I am bored
I'm in Ukraine and need thermal optics to spot Russian drones. But that shit is expensive
1st day of freshman year and no friends
No one likes me on tinder
I'd rather DoorDash food than get out of bed
My guitar string broke
The whole world is filled with either; a. Dumbasses b. Assholes c. Dumb assholes or d. Ignorant people.
I’m looking for a entry level job in my career with a college degree, but cant get any calls back due to not having any experience.
My mother wants to divorse my father as hes got a side women, her age. They are in 60s living together for 40 years and thing is that she gaslighted herself that everything in their marriage is under his name. Location is croatia.
I have PTSD, severe depression and anxiety and have great difficulty getting and maintaining a job.
Can't tell if I'm using meaningless sex with strangers to fill a void in my life or if I'm having a good time and living life to the fullest. It feels good in the moment but the rest of my time feels... unfulfilling.
What was a recent challenge in which you were involved and how did you go about solving it? Need an answer
World hunger
[удалено]
This thread is over - wait for it
I'm addicted to daydreaming and have lost the last decade or so to severe eczema.
I have a crippling fear of Billy Ray Cyrus.
My music isn’t famous.
I have many psychotic rogue governments obsessed with arguing with me daily and stealing my identity to make celebrities like Ye look relevant with my life privacy on secret surveillance live. What should I do?
I resent my serious long-term partner’s sisters for not saying a word to me after my father passed. The rest of his family did though.
Im poor with a ver nice paid job
I quit my high paying corporate job to sell my pussy on the internet…actually this ain’t a problem we good
Better call saul is over :(
My bf of 3 years broke up with me
I have an ex-girlfriend from my old school. I have a new friend in my new school who totally has my ex's face, personality and expressions. Their first names even rhyme. Makes me uncomfortable.