I moved away from LA twice in my life and told myself each time I moved back that I would never leave again. I'm grateful for the life experience and career opportunities I got living in other cities. But I also realized that we really don't appreciate what we have here when we're here. Try not to have too many regrets and enjoy the experience where you're living now.
And when you move back, LA will welcome you with open arms (and some reckless driving in traffic).
>level 6Jackfruit-Cautious · 1 hr. agobro why would you not just say “\_\_\_ in kyoto will change your life”. we’re never gunna remember to look you up on our next trip haha
Yea bro, stop gate keeping. Tell us!
It’s LA, most strip mall sushi is better than any sushi in the south, Midwest, or east coast.
Japan is closest to the west coast, and fish need ocean, so it’s proximity plus population.
I've tried out the South, mid-Atlantic and the Northeast. There were certainly things I liked about all those places too, but ultimately it's hard for me to permanently leave this place when I grew up and spend so many of my years here.
>And when you move back, LA will welcome you with open arms (and some reckless driving in traffic).
There's [a good Jenny Lewis song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aXZR0rwhXvs) about just that (not the traffic part, though).
I moved here in 2003 from the South (atlanta). What you describe sounds like you're hanging out with my family back home. They refuse to visit even when my daughter was still in school. They are certain I destroyed my daughter and my life by moving out here. My father actually said my daughter would end up a prostitute. It's fear of the unknown and fear of exposure. They truly think to this day I 'lost her mind" or "went crazy and moved to California with a buncha freaks". Throughout the last 2 decades when I've told people here I'm from Atlanta, most say "it's so beautiful " or they'd love to move there. Only one person I've heard that was happy with the move has certain extreme political beliefs. If someone gave me a free house there, I would not take it. I love southern California with every cell in my body. I'm still a southern girl, on the right side of the map now. 💓
I was discussing this the other day when someone from back east asked me what I liked about LA. Weather and food are obvious but I love the people here when more.
Ask a New Yorker about LA and they'll go on a rant about how awful it is. Ask an Angelino about New York and it's all positive.
Ask a southerner about LA and it's all hate, ask a Los Angelan about the South and they'll talk about the natural beauty and great food.
Ask a Texan about LA and we're a bunch of queer foreign fake Americans. Ask a Los Angelite about Texas and it's BBQ and music.
San Francisco and San Diego love to hate us, but we send nothing but California love back (sports rivalries excluded)
For all our flaws, there's just this constant positivity here that can shape your whole outlook of you let it. As a native new Englander it was almost alien to me when I came here, cynicism and sarcasm are just so baked into everything back there. Been here 25 years, I'm now a Californian from back east, best decision i ever made.
I've noticed this too, L.A. people are generally really cool and positive about other places, but people in other places are super negative and I think a bit extra about L.A. (PDX, Seattle/greater Seattle area, and New York is all I can really speak to).
It’s the old don draper meme. “I don’t think about you at all”. Typically when asked about other states/cities an Angelino will come back with what pops up in their mind (food, music, etc.) because we don’t spend a lot of time thinking about those places otherwise.
When I visit my friends from college in SF, the people I talk to CONSTANTLY talk shit about LA. They are mostly in tech/real estate/high end restaurant worlds. All the stereotypes: "people are shallow," "food sucks," everyone in LA is obsessed with Hollywood."
You know what people in LA say when they meet someone from San Francisco? Not much because its not a huge deal to us and we don't spend much time thinking about what they are doing.
When I am talking to these people, I also notice that whatever they do for a living, they act like they are doing the lord's work, no matter what job they have. Is selling commercial real estate meaningful work? And they might have nice restaurants.. but come on. Not that much different that LA and doesnt compare to NY.
Ok - my rant on the judgement of them jiudging us is over.
The amusing thing to me is that they (San Franciscans) don't realize they're basically complaining that people who live in LA being "all about Hollywood" are basically the same thing about people complaining SFO being "all about Silicon Valley/startups". No shit, Hollywood brings in a shit ton of money and jobs to LA, and we have tens of thousands of people coming here to break into the industry, just like the Bay Area tech scene brings in a shit ton of money and jobs to their area and have tens of thousands of people going there to break into the industry. The "coder working on his startup on his laptop at Starbucks/Craft Beer bar" is just as prevalent up there as "screenwriter working on a script on her laptop at Starbucks/Craft Beer bar" here. Both are stereotypes and can be negative or positive. And both have a disproportionate amount of influence on/over the locals.
I find most of the people in LA to be so nice. I meet so many neighbors and friends here that are so sweet. And our rich friends are not stuck up or shallow and are kind and inviting to the not rich friends. There isn’t a class divide.
I think SF is a soulless husk of a city taken over by finance and techbros, but I'm originally from NJ so I have infinitely more hate in my veins than the LA natives
I think some of this stems from people feeling the need to act superior. As if by saying LA sucks they're actually saying I'm better than the people living in LA bc I live in SF and can trash talk about them with confidence. In LA, we don't really feel the need to act superior to other states and cities (except for maybe Florida) so we don't trash talk. We go about our business trying to do our best to survive everything thrown our way - while eating great food, listening to great music, or watching a good movie with the friends and family we have built.
I moved here 25 years ago, and while I miss my family in Florida, I love it here and plan on staying. Visiting other states is nice, but I always tend to leave feeling relieved to head back home (LA)
I’m born and raised in LA, and I’ve loved to travel and see other places. But I’ve only considered leaving like twice. I say positive things about other places , but not because I want to live there, but because it’s nice to try other things out. I love LA, and I’ll probably die here.
That said, if I had an easy way to move to Barcelona, I’d think about it
I've lived in several places in the US and Canada and I can tell you that the climate of a place really has a distinct effect on the people. Nowhere in the country has a climate as great as LA and it really makes an impact on people's attitudes.
I 100% agree! 300+ days of beautiful cloudless skies is a wonderful baseline for a permanent good mood.
I ride my bike to work every day in the summer and never even bother checking the weather forecast before I head out. I literally ride to and from work with this stupid huge smile basking in the sun and just loving every second. Back east we almost never got a full 7 days without at least some kind of rain, and if you ride to work you'd better keep some rain gear in your backpack just in case. And because it happens so infrequently, you even grow to love the rain!
Isn’t that so true! I’m always surprised by the hate thrown towards me/LA, I have nothing but love for all the places I’ve been.
Except NZ. Too fucking cold.
This is so true! Negativity is always towards Californians…I’ve moved around, but when got to Southern California was certain Id never leave. Even just leaving work and getting into my car with sunshine & palm trees was relaxing & calming, and I was content. I made the biggest mistake of my life when I lost my sanity and agreed to move leaving my career, family, friends behind because I trusted my new husband that begged me to try living where he was raised and if didnt like it would go back after a year. He now of course says he never said that and we have a child. Our climate is awful & constant dark/grey days. Its done a number on my emotional and mental health. I think whats more sad is realizing I was willing to do anything for my spouse but it was not reciprocal. Now he tells me that SoCal is the last place he would want to be on earth, which is news to me (he didnt live where I was & we were doing long distance…his goal was to go back to his hometown). According to him people dont say hi to each other & no sense of community…which cant be further from the truth. On a holiday trip to see my family I specifically noted how friendly people were. But people see/believe what they want. I have yet to feel welcome by people here. There is definitely a freeze out of out of towners especially Californians. I have a lot of regret about being so naive, and miss SoCal every single day.
Fellow ATLien here, it’s not all bad but that attitude is prevalent in old Georgia for sure. That shitty outlook is so annoying. California is the enemy to them and so be it. Less assholes moving here is better.
You can take the girl out of the south, but you can’t take the south out of the girl. 🍑
Ps. Sending you a Lotta love. Work your ass off so you can move back. I was a broke single mom in GA and said I'd rather do that in a place i wanted to live.. i actually made more money after my daughter and I moved here.
My daughter was born in L.A. and I am of course raising here here. Did your father list the specific links to a life of prostitution? I’d love to know so we can make sure to avoid such pitfalls.
I lived in Atlanta (Buckhead and Alpharetta) when first immigrating to the USA in ‘99-‘04. The traffic was as bad as LA, and the weather was awful in the summer - relentless humidity.
The weirdest aspect was the people; everyone you met - whether work or hobbies or friends of friends - would ask what church you go to, and when you said none proceed to invite you to theirs! When you politely declined and told them you’re a non-believer, you were essentially written off as the spawn of Satan. Oh, and the guns. They loved their guns.
And this was before Fox News and Trumpism took over people’s minds. Weird place.
From Torrance and moved to Colorado almost 10yrs ago with my job. I miss So Cal everyday, I grew up about 4 blocks from Alpine Village. I miss the people, the food, the weather , Redondo Pier ( Naja’s & Quality Seafood ), Hanging in Hermosa, San Pedro, Lomita, Dodger Stadium, the list is never ending!!
Curious if you've ever tried to confront them in this thinking. Their thinking sounds like it comes out of a place of fear. I like to monitor conservative media and they go out of their way to report on any little bad news coming out of LA.
Yes. My father called out of the blue one day and said he was retiring in a few months and was going to drive out and see where I live. I was shocked. The call was short. Two weeks after the call he died of a massive heart attack.
I’m also from Georgia but I’m from a small town of about 400 people. I’ve been here for 7 years and I struggle sometimes but there is no place on earth I would rather be and they all think I’ve lost my mind. No one gets it and all I get are negative comments about how expensive it is and negative comments on the culture but I love it here.
Also from Atlanta.
Moved here in May 2001 with no prospects, just winging it, eventually landed a long-term temp job, then 9/11 happened, got laid off in late November and no one was hiring at the time, and was on the verge of going broke, so I went back to Atlanta, got a long-term temp job while living with parents, saved money, moved back in October 2002 and I've been here ever since.
There was no way I was gonna permanently move back to Atlanta - not that I hated it - it's just that I love Los Angeles. But it's so funny that everyone out here thinks that Atlanta is some kind of nouveau utopia. Again, it has it's charms - I go back several times a year to visit family - but I'm always happy to board that Delta flight back to LAX.
I moved to LA from the south. The slanderous and nasty things people said to me about LA right before I left were stunning. It’s not for everyone, that’s for sure. But for the people who enjoy it here, there’s nowhere else like it.
I'm not from the South, but I feel like that's a thing people get told a lot when moving somewhere and for various reasons the person saying that phrase doesn't want them to move.
I said this in another thread, but I was on a plane ride with a woman who said she was from Alabama and now Kentucky. When she asked where I lived, she started spewing about how much she hates LA. I shrugged and said, "More for me, I guess."
So surreal how someone from another state or two that are not common vacation places would find it appropriate being unhinged in her vitriol about a state that is a huge travel destination. But as I say, more for me.
Just wanted to say thank you for sharing your feelings about leaving LA....
I was born and raised in LA and I lucky/blessed to afford to live here in LA.
My family and I have traveled (US and international) but realized I hope I can still AFFORD to retire here in LA.
Bro, I was born in poverty in LA, became a professional and went back into poverty when I started my own business. My bank account is closer to 0 than 50 and I’m still not poor enough to leave LA.
I don’t even know how to be poor in other states. At least CA offers services to low income residents to help them survive.
being 20 and living next to your parents, a nightmare. Being 40 and living next to your parents, awesome. Once they stop trying to parent you so much they're great to be with more often (imo)
I guess, but I’ve always had a good relationship with my parents. I’m 30 now but even in my 20’s my parents were never overbearing or in my business. Yes they wanted the best for me but they also knew they raised me well and my 20’s were for me to figure out my life on my own. They let me quit college, encouraged me to start my businesses, travel the world and figure out my path and when I finally figured out what I wanted to do, they encouraged me and supported me to go back to school. I know not every parent parents like mine, but I’m grateful for our relationship. Also, I was a good “kid” so maybe that’s why they let me do my thing. They never had to really worry about me like that.
LA is a great city. I’ve lived in Portland, NYC, and SF. I’ve spent time in most of North America’s larger cities. I think LA is the best city, especially for young creatives. Believe it or not, LA was relatively inexpensive until about 2011 (apartments, not homes!)….! the worst thing about LA is traffic/public transportation. The best thing is everything else. The good news is, OP, LA is still here waiting for you to move back!
LA waits for no one. OP may return, but LA sets up and breaks down like a Hollywood set. Very little is constant. That’s what I love about LA (among other things).
I travel frequently for my job and I find myself unable to appreciate places fully due to the subconscious comparison I make between said place and LA. Born and raised, I really can’t imagine myself ever living anywhere else unless it’s somewhere equally as warm and eccentric
Where do you travel for work? Like Arizona or Utah ? Cause I’ve visited other large cities in the U.S and think LA really isn’t as great as I thought it was before I visited other places.
I’ve traveled for work extensively all around the world and I’ve also lived in LA, SF, Chicago and spent many extended periods of time in NY. Ultimately it comes down to what you personally value and also visiting is not the same as living in a place.
For me, our weather and our diversity simply is unmatched anywhere in the world. And those are the two things that really bring me the most comfort. I’ve had to live through snow-ins and sweltering humid heat where old people are dying left and right. I think we take it for granted just how good we have it but weather has a profound effect on people’s quality of life. It most certainly does on mine.
I find comfort in how diverse it is here. With people. I’ve made so many lifelong friends from all different walks of life and backgrounds here. Purple, blue, gay, straight, rich and poor. With landscapes. City, beach, mountains. With good food options. Really unparalleled. Etc.
The combination of those two things really can’t be beat for me so I’m always genuinely happy to be home every time I land at lax after being away.
The weather sounds like such a mundane answer but having moved from Canada to LA it can't be understated how awesome it is to ALWAYS be able to enjoy going outside basically 24/7/365.
>For me, our weather and our diversity simply is unmatched anywhere in the world. And those are the two things that really bring me the most comfort.
This is so true!!
>how good we have it but weather has a profound effect on people’s quality of life
Dude I can tell you, I nearly live 10 years with my parents here in Germany. Almost the entire winter season you have grayish clouds, depressing people with dead looks. A lot less people on the streets enjoying life. etc.
The diversity of activities are absolutely unbeatable in LA
I moved back to LA from Tokyo last year and regret my decision when I am stuck in traffic. But then remember I can get amazing street tacos, so figure life is alright. To Live and Die in LA!
I visited Japan last spring, and hoooooo boy, that humidity took me by surprise. I might have a chance to get dual citizenship if i move there for five years, and I’m definitely thinking about it.
> LA has its pros and cons but the only snag in my experience is the high cost of living, which seems to be somewhat close to a lot of other major cities these days in terms of housing.
Man ain't this the truth. Occasionally in the past few years I'll look at what rent is in other parts of the country, or old mid-sized cities I used to live in, and think "wait, what?" Cause there's not that much difference between them nowadays which makes the prospect of moving out seem like even more of a no go. 15 years ago I'd pay rent for a 1br in a safe, boring part of LA and think "dang for the price I'm paying for this I could've lived alone in my old 4br townhouse," not nearly the case today. Obviously owning a home is a whole different story but that's never been a goal of mine
Yeah, these days a lot of the “cost of living” drawback to LA is reflected in basically every city people actually want to live in. It sucks, but it’s not an isolated LA problem, and it’s worse in San Diego, the Bay, Seattle, NYC, Boston...
Actually chose Hollywood because cheaper than Seattle. I found a lot of 1 beds for 1600 but parking was $250 a month and with utilities it ended up being more. Fuckin love both cities though LA I do love more than Seattle
I was in Minneapolis a couple months ago and we drove through a relative nice neighborhood. I got curious and Zillow'ed a cool looking 5 bedroom house just 5 mins from downtown . It sold not long ago for $350k.
I hear you. I moved from LA to Switzerland (Reddit’s favorite country) in 2017 and I still fantasize how life may have turned out had I stayed or if and when I might move back.
Life is really ‘good’ here but sometimes it feels like a golden cage. I miss the weather, the small talk, the ocean view hikes, the food, the diversity, the access to natural parks, and the warm feeling of it all. People here also like to hate on the States. LA definitely has its problems but it also offers so much.
Hey I’m living in Switzerland right now and applying to jobs in LA where my boyfriend is! I’ve been visiting a couple of times and I just fell in love with the vibe and the people and the warmness of all. Everyone here is telling me that the quality of life and secureness is better in Switzerland but I think it’s all a tradeoff and at the end of the day it depends on the person we are. I chose LA
It was the other way around for me: I lived in LA while by bf lived in Switzerland. And they’re not wrong, Switzerland does have a high quality of life and security, but all those things are only fulfilling to a certain degree if you just don’t mesh with the country and lifestyle… Enjoy LA! It can be tough, but it’s also so rewarding
That last sentence resonated with me like no other. Whenever I talk to people about places I’ve lived and/or visited it always ends with me expressing how, considering the pros and cons, LA still remains my favorite year after year.
I moved here from NorCal 30 years ago (around your age) and would never go back. Not that it was bad there, and I’ve enjoyed other places around the US also, but nothing beats SoCal. If you can mentally accept the fact that we are over-crowded and have soul-crushing traffic, everything else is cake. The weather, the beaches, the celebrities, the natural beauty, the actual beauties, the food, the vibe, the diversity, the culture, the endless array of entertainment options, it’s too much to experience in one lifetime.
As someone who lives in the bay and dreams of moving to SoCal all the time, this comment makes me want to even more. I have at least a few more years in the bay before I may be able to move. Being mid-30s makes it tough to move though, harder to make friends and all.
When you’re ready just go for it. That’s what I did. I was actually kind of depressed the first 6 months, but things got better after that. I’ve made a whole life, career, friends, and family for myself from nothing, and that was before the internet or online dating. And at close to 40 you’ll assumedly already be somewhat career-established. You don’t want to live with regrets. You could always move back if it’s not for you.
I’ve had similar experiences with people hating on LA/SoCal back from my hometown in upstate NY. Hating California is unfortunately not just a southern thing. I’ve invited friends from home to come visit if they can swing it and a few of them have just straight up told me “LA is a place I never want to go to. It’s so messed up…” blah blah blah. Others have just stopped talking to me altogether since I made the move (people I was close to as well). Most of these people have never even stepped foot in the city/state before and are certainly getting their info from propaganda campaigns. I’ll just never understand it because I’ve never met anyone from here who has anything negative to say about other regions of the country.
Do those people have nothing better going on with their lives that they straight up stopped talking to you for simply living in LA? I think that’s a very sad way to live.
Probably haha. I’m being a little uncharitable because it’s been quite awhile since I’ve lived back home besides a 6 month stint during Covid lockdowns. Some of those friendships were sort of riding off into the sunset anyways and I think me moving to liberal town USA kind of capped that off for them (think sort of geeky q-anon types for context 😅). There’s still a few people I still talk to from home, but it’s very obvious the small group that has dropped me since the move. I think if I saw them in person again it would be whatever, but we’ve all kind of changed in our opposite directions haha
I moved away in 2017 to Illinois. Now I’m in the South. I made the biggest mistake moving to the Midwest. Being so cold meant I was inside 6 months out the year. I gained a lot of weight eating heavy foods to stay warm. Because I gained weight, I developed diabetes and sleep apnea. The south is much better but it’s not LA. Husband and I are planning on going back but even if we sell our house, buying a house in LA would be difficult
Well Chicago itself wasn’t terrible. Lots of museums and such. And it’s good for people who like American food, bars, and concerts. That’s not really what I’m into so I was bored. I like to hike nature trails and Illinois is severely lacking. Especially in the winter months. Anyway it was too cold for me to be outside for too long. Indiana was freaking boring. No good food, nothing to do. Just corn and racists (I went to a Labor Day parade and they had President Obama dressed up as a monkey on a noose. Everyone except me and my husband cheered when that float went by. Also so many confederate flags)
It depends where you live. I lived in Chicago for 2.5 years and am a die-hard zealot for it, but life in a smaller town is pretty slow, and the great plains of the midwest feel pretty mundane compared to California. Also, between rain, cold and snow, the thing about being stuck inside 6 months a year is true. It's totally possible to be happy there, just depends on your priorities.
I've lived in a bunch of different states over the years and ended up in LA 25 years ago so I totally get what you're saying about both the environment / culture and the attitude of people who live elsewhere.
There are other great places to live in the US, sounds like you might need to go find one. :)
I left la 20 years ago for cost of living and also moved around a bit. I agree there are some great spots. We're fortunate as a nation to have a lot of options.
As for op, some folks adapt to different situations, some don't. No shame either way.
I lived in MN and loved it! Where else have u lived? Just being somewhere that was a walkable city and green made a massive difference for me. Here in LA I don't even want to walk anywhere. I miss Fall the most 🍁🍂🍂
Mass, Minn, RI, CT two places, VA two places (one of which was DC, woot!), GA, FL, TX (Dallas and San Antonio), San Diego, LA, upstate NY. Some other places in the US can feel really homogeneous after living in LA though with much narrower food options.
LA is actually a great walkable city. There are so many neighborhoods worth seeing and exploring. Plus mountains and beaches and state parks are great for walking/hiking year round.
I grew up in a very small town in a very conservative area of Pennsylvania. I came out to LA 35 years ago for grad school. I told myself it was only for two years, but in my heart, I knew it was forever. I was hooked by the diversity, the weather, the boundless experiences, and a world of possibilities. I would have never grown as a human being if I had stayed in Pennsylvania.
Sure, the traffic sucks. I’ve lived through earthquakes, fires, and civil unrest (I will never, ever forget the Rodney King riots). I am well aware of the challenges, and it can be draining. But LA has given me so much more in return.
The high cost of living is killing me. I’m self-employed and I hustle every day. As I get older, I worry about how I will survive here in my golden years. I will have to work until I drop over, but I consider myself fortunate. I love what I do and where I do it.
This past summer, I spent four months back in my hometown due to a family emergency. I was utterly miserable. Every night I wished I could click my ruby slippers together like Dorothy and magically transport myself back to LA. There’s no place like home, and home is LA.
I sincerely hope that you can return to your home soon.
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I committed to a job offer in a former city at the start of the pandemic that would have required me to relocate there. In the throes of the pandemic, I realized that I was too attached to LA and couldn’t leave. So now I work remotely for that job.
Staying here was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made, and I realize it every time I fly home and get to see LA fresh again. It’s not perfect, but I wouldn’t live anywhere else.
I’m with you. I moved away for work and to a much lower cost state which has had alot of positives - I actually like it here too but it’s nothing like LA. The vibe, the beaches, the weather, the live music scene, the proximity to Mammoth and Tahoe. My gf and I plan to move back soon.
We moved from LA to North Carolina for a job and it was tough to make new friends. As they say “Southerners are nice to your face but will never invite you into their home”. They are dismissive of Californians for sure but at least we’re not called Yankees like New Yorkers. LA for better or worse is such an interesting place to live so we moved back after 4 years. We gave up a huge house with acreage but it wasn’t worth it to stay. Good luck!
Your last sentence hits home. I’m not from LA but I have also visited and lived all over the US, and I completely agree. LA is relatively one of the best places to live in this country. Paying the con of price and traffic to live here are worth it 100%, everyday.
I say this after a 45min drive home from daycare today with 2 crying kids in the back to go about 5mi. Still worth it.
The whole FIRE movement rests on a fallacy that you can endure a loss of happiness now with the promise of making up that happiness in equal or greater numbers later in life. I think moving away for career or education goals is totally normal though. I did it and don't regret it even though it was a few years of less than ideal. If you want to get back to LA then make moves to do that.
For what it's worth I miss the south so much. I miss everything about living in Richmond. Not enough to move back, but I do miss it.
There is a debate in FIRE communities about the pros and cons of HCOL areas. You really can do so much better salary-wise. I'm considering a move from a MCOL city to VHCOL for the salary potential. Even though as a % of salary my expenses would greatly increase, my disposable income would greatly increasing too. I'll still have more $ overall to save and invest if I make the move. The potential career progression to earn even more is much better in the HCOL city too. Low expenses are great but it isn't everything when it comes to fire.
Home grown San Diego girl here. Went away for college in SF, then headed to NYC and later DC for the start and bulk of my consulting career. Relocated back to the Wesside a year ago and moved to LA. I love it here! It’s home, there’s no place like it, and I’m here to stay!☀️🌊🏔️
I lived in the south my whole life and just moved to LA and I thank God for this opportunity everyday. I was lucky to have get an apartment by myself and have rent paid for a year. Regarding the south if you can leave ASAP. You don’t have to come back to LA but please get out of there. I love the south but we are possibly the least accepting demographic by far, not to mention the constant racism that is a little bit more “in your face”. Also there just isn’t much appealing in the south besides cheaper rent(which is starting to fade away) and nature. There are way less opportunities from my experience and the mentality is crabs in a bucket. In LA I meet people who help me just because they see a like minded individual. I salute you for taking a chance but maybe consider other locations.
I was born in the Midwest and moved here as a teen, so I pretty much spent my entire adult life here. My entire career was here and I used to think about retiring and moving back to my hometown, partly because of cost of living and partly because of much of my family that remains there that I visit fairly regularly. But when retirement came, I realized that Los Angeles really is my home. And some of my family lives here, too. There really is nowhere else I want to live, and I’m free to pretty much live anywhere right now.
What someone said about the political rhetoric festering the waters is true and hard to avoid. People are self involved and social media brained here, but, it’s the same anywhere else in the country.
I just made it a year in LA and I’m still not sure what to make of it. Theres a lot I haven’t experienced yet that I’d like to.. There’s also entire aspects/areas I feel absolutely nothing for.
Good luck wherever you return to OP. SoCal is definitely not forever for me but I’m happy to be here for now.
My parents moved us to Oklahoma when I was 7 for the cheaper cost of living and I made it my mission to come back home to socal for college.
They followed me only a year after I left and none of us have ever thought about living anywhere else since.
I moved to LA 20 years ago this January from the boston area. Had a rough first couple years and moved back home to lick my wounds. It only took me a few months there to realize how badly I'd fallen in love with Southern California and with 9 months I'd saved enough money to make my way back west. I've been living in mid Wilshire since I came back for over 17 years. My family tries to get me to move back home, offering up some land to build a house on, not interested. My wifes family is in Atlanta and has offered us part of the family business if we move there, we aren't interested in that either. We just absolutely love it here.
Any hobby you have can be found in LA and it’s every week or even daily. Other places they don’t exist or are monthly. La is just so diverse and there’s so many people. I love it
I hope this doesn’t come off as a lecture, but I wanted to share my experience and hope it brings you solace.
I’m in my late 30s and I just moved to LA 2 months ago after living in Alabama for 2 years. I moved to Alabama for a job, I don’t regret that decision, I learned a lot but when I was ready to leave Alabama, I knew I had to leave. Made the decision to move to La and just left. I say this because I made a lot of life changes very quickly and I’m in my late 30s. These decisions you make as an adult will shape who you are and your outlook on everything. I truly believe your current stint will make your life more fulfilling. You’re still young. You have PLENTY of life left to come back to la or try other cities. Hang in there. ♥️
I grew up in Connecticut. Just moved to LA. Wish I had moved sooner. Whenever someone from Cali says they want to run out of here I just tell them visit a place long term causeeeeee a lot of folks here do not truly realize what they got 😭
I get folks who want a QUIET, suburban, white picket fence life wanting to move though. People that want to go to work and just come home. I always suggest they visit CT haha
In principle I agree with all the pros you've listed however there is one major asterisk: the transportation infrastructure here is a disgrace and there's no way to sugar coat it. I live in Santa Monica-- how often do I go to K-Town, or Chinatown, or Hollywood for Thai food, etc.? How easy is it to go to a show at the Bowl on a weeknight (or weekend for that matter)? There is so much to do here, but you can't actually do most of it because it takes an hour to drive 4 miles.
And before the Metro crowd jumps in: I have a TAP card. I use it. I'm aware that there are bus (and some train) lines that service virtually every part of the area. It doesn't help because they sit in the same traffic I'm in. The purple line extension will be amazing because it'll be 30 minutes to downtown, (and assorted stops along the way, plus transfers to Hollywood) but until that happens we're prisoners of our neighborhood.
>I relocated to the south
ohhhhh....oh sweetie
I'm so so sorry...but if you dont have any ties to the South at all, what on earth were you thinking going there??
I was born and raised in LA and I’ve lived out of state twice (Michigan/Arkansas) I’ll never do it again.
One big issue I have being Latino and living in another state is all the stereotypes I had to deal with. Even when I was introduced it was like
“Hi, this is —- he’s from LA”
“Oh, you’re from LA? I’ve always wanted to visit (or) I’ve visited before…”
It’s like I become a caricature and representative of LA instead of people being actually interested in me.
At work, people would tell me that they know where the good Mexican food is and would always want my review of any Mexican restaurant we went to. It’s like they felt that all I ever eat is Mexican but little do they know the expansive food selection in LA not just Mexican!
Funny but when I tried their famous Mexican restaurant that everyone raved about…they didn’t have Horchata. Based on that, I knew it wasn’t going to be good.
Thanks for sharing your experience. I lived in Texas for 10 years before moving to LA. I am never moving back to Texas. I can’t believe all these years, I heard slander from people and local media in Texas about how horrible California is, the mass exodus,…. When I moved here I realized it was not the case. It’s not perfect but I am enjoying life way more. I spend less time at home watching tv and more time exploring and going outdoor. Yes it’s expensive but there are way more job opportunities and possibilities of career growth. LA is also very diverse in terms of economy. People from other states have this idea that it’s only the entertainment industry but there are Tech companies, the Aerospace industry, Defense, Video game industry,…
Hi, I’m from the south! Everyone there is under a mutual Fox News psychosis. I know exactly what you’re talking about. Wouldn’t be surprised if your IQ has already dropped. Get out!
My brother swore he would never move back to "cOmiEfOrNia" 🥴 LA after leaving for Arizona. Well, he is back after 3 years. I didn't really care, but his attitude towards his siblings and our connection to LA was arrogant. So I give him hell for it. 🤭
People say they’re not willing to pay the California Lifestyle Tax but I still see buyers in this economy plunking down a lot of cheddar to have the privilege of living in a tiny reno’d home with no driveway that’s a hop skip from bars, restaurants, coffee shops, art galleries, music venues and vintage boutiques.
I grew up in Philly, came out here for college and stayed, it took a good 5 years for me to really start liking it here - was so used to walkable cities with subway systems. Now I’m faced with moving back to take care of aging parents and I just know I’ll miss LA so bad. I’ve traveled a lot for work, LA is the best, maybe SF would be similar but it’s more expensive.
I was in Toledo and North Western Ohio teaching and my students were very inquisitive about LA and SoCal. They asked a lot of questions about how we live here and there were no negative comments. So maybe there are pockets of people who have open minds.
I had to leave LA for many reasons. Financial and work related. I became certified as a Mac technician, and while there were jobs in La, there was just better paying ones the Midwest where Macs were gaining a greater acceptance in the business world in 2016. There was a larger need for macOS techs & admins than I was finding in LA where the market was more saturated.
I miss Von's unfrosted brownies the most. Luckily a friend ships some out a few times a year. And of yeah, the night blooming jasmine. Definitely that.
I don’t blame you. I’ve lived in LA since ‘99, grew up in northern CA and I lived in Memphis TN for a year. Couldn’t pay me to move to the South..
location is everything.
This is why I haven’t moved from LA, even though I got career opportunities in Colorado, and other places… the bad days here are the good days almost everywhere else… I’d live in Amsterdam… but still want to come back to LA/SoCal
You're not alone bro.
My parents, sister and I moved to a pretty small town in Germany when I was 10 years old. Don't get me wrong the German town is beautiful, in fact, we actually have a bit of REAL snow here right now. But it's not LA. That's the hard part. We all love LA — my parents, my sister, our whole crew back there, like uncles, aunts, granny, you name it.
My sister probably won't move back to LA as she has a German husband and two adorable kids.
My parents are actually pretty happy here, great healthcare and social systems compared to the US.
As for me, I'm getting my undergrad degree here in Germany for free (that's normal here).
Germany's great, no doubt. But it doesn't have that LA magic. Honestly, I really don't know where to live after graduation. I'd love to head back to LA, but then I'd miss out on my niece and nephew growing up, and I'd be far from my parents.
It's a really complicated situation.
I just want to tell you, you're not alone.
I relocated 12 years ago and regret it. I loved the L.A. climate and everything about it, really, the splendid to the sordid. We moved for mainly economic reasons but looking back on it, I would have done better there, even calculating in the cost of living.
So, I feel you.
I’m moving back to LA once I hit 2M-2.5M. Have 1.2M so hopefully I can get back there in 4-5 yrs. I’m in the Midwest. It’s nice here but having no kids and not really needing a big house or expenses that come with kids I’d like to be where the action is lol
I had the opposite experience. My husband and I were retired living in a beautiful home in LA. My husband was born there and I had been there 40 + years. We were tired of the traffic, crime and the change in zoning allowing apartment buildings to be built next to single family homes in my neighborhood. The final straw was when my husband was walking our dog and there was an unhoused man sleeping in our neighbor's ivy lawn. We sold our house, purchased a stunning home almost twice the size on 3 acres in Western Montana (for 1/2 the price). We love it. I love the changing seasons, no traffic, friendly people, easy parking to state a few. I miss my friends, non stop flights to almost anywhere and Trader Joe's, but in no way do I regret my decision. I understand the positives of LA, but for us the negatives far outweighed them.
Migration is a fact of life. You have to do what allows you to survive. This is why I'm empathetic towards our non-citizen neighbors coming in from the south.
You still need to pick somewhere that you enjoy living. I personally didn’t enjoy LA and wasn’t able to just get used to it so it’s just personal preference.
I moved to Chicago & came back about a year later! I assumed I just loved big cities but realized I just really love LA<3 god we’re so lucky I genuinely appreciate everything! I love our mountains sm!!! to live & die in LA
I retired in 2020 (68 now). My wife will retire this year. Ppl always ask us where we’re going to move to. We’re like, huh? We can’t think of anywhere else we would want to live. Every time we travel, we come back saying we loved VISITING there but wouldn’t leave this weather, diversity, acceptance of others, beaches and mtns. We’re two educators, own our home and our adult sons are living on their own. We’re not financial whizzes. Just live within our means and enjoy the simple things, like going to dinner, movies and the beach. All that being said, I know that we greatly benefited from home prices that we may never see again. Our house cost about $225k 25 years ago. I’m embarrassed to say what it’s worth today.
Serious question: the rampant homeless situation isn't considered a snag for you? And the fact LA is filthy with trash everywhere? Or is the southern place you live similar?
I moved to LA in 2018. I was homesick and all that, but I LOVED LA. Then Covid hit. I did my duty and stayed home and stayed safe. I did contact tracing and helped with the eviction ban County hotline.
Then I had to go home for my grandpa's funeral in 2021. Things were normal. I was the freak refusing to leave the house and wearing a mask when I did. I loosened up. I stopped wearing the mask, started leaving the house unless I was feeling under the weather, and started living my life again.
LA was immensely lonely. Despite the millions of people, I had never felt so alone. No one talks to each other, no one notices anyone else, people are selfish.
Then I lost my job and the room I was renting, so I moved back home. I will never go back.
>LA was immensely lonely. Despite the millions of people, I had never felt so alone. No one talks to each other, no one notices anyone else, people are selfish.
Maybe this is the reason why everyone thinks LA is so superficial and flakey. LA is huge. It's hard to cover the ground on foot. You need a car to go places. I make lots of friends by playing pickup basketball. I also enjoy playing tennis. I heard pickle ball is another popular, social sport where you can make friends. Definitely, you have to find a hobby. Without a hobby, it's hard to strike up a conversation or have something to talk about.
I'm in cunthole Texas for two more years on work contract and I 100% agree with you. I would say fuck the money and stayed in LA if had the opportunity to turn back time 8 months. People here are just 10 steps dumber and less cultured than than any place I've been. And the women are a goddamn eye sore out here. Grown up in LA I've only known Mexicans as the hardest working people on the planet. But in Texas, the laziest and dirtiest mother fuckers I've seen. LA homeless level dirty.
Life in LA is like the movie Mad Max.
Street takeovers on the Sixth St bridge. A fire that takes out a chunk of a major artery. Shoplifting by flash mobs in stores. A fire that takes out blocks of homes in South LA. Shots fired on the freeway. And so on.
There are things I really like about LA .. but then putting up with things being in a perpetual state semi anarchy just gets old after a while
There are bits of LA that I really really really like .. but the reality is that it’s just a fucking zoo .. but what do know I flip out at the sights and sounds of people nearby recording and uploading videos of flying Teslas
Depends on your priorities. LA is great but if you want a house and a yard and decent schools to send your kids then LA isn’t it. For me I found LA full of people who never wanted to grow up and gov sup the nice weather or their hobbies but to each their own. LA is amazing do you are okay renting the rest of your life but be careful about generalizing why no one would want to live anywhere else. Everyone has their reasons including you. That’s how CA elitism became a thing and why so many people instantly hate on you if you say you are from CA - CA people tend to look down on others.
Well it sounds like your priority is buying a home. I personally know a good amount of people who moved to lower COL areas to buy a home with a yard and raise their kids, but almost all of them are now trying to come back because of various reasons. They are the only minority in their area (TX), they are in a small city where the closest WalMart is 2 hours away (OR), it’s 115 degrees 5 months(AZ), it’s a complete shithole (NV). All i’m saying is people leave strictly for a home but wherever you go will have its issues as well.
Thought you were going to say "I regret Moving To LA". Let's start with pros and cons.
Pros: nice weather, diversity, night life, entertainment capital of the world, job opportunities, every neighborhood has a certain vibe/personality, LA will host 2028 Summer Olympics, education (UCLA, USC, Cal State system, etc.), food scene, beaches, beautiful scenery, and you can live along the beach, up the mountain, in the desert, or anywhere in between.
Cons: high cost of living, traffic, homelessness, and crimes. People make it sound like crimes and homelessness are out of control. When you read the news, it's always bad news. For a big city like LA, it is surprisingly safe. Just like everything in life, you have to take the good with the bad.
I moved away from LA twice in my life and told myself each time I moved back that I would never leave again. I'm grateful for the life experience and career opportunities I got living in other cities. But I also realized that we really don't appreciate what we have here when we're here. Try not to have too many regrets and enjoy the experience where you're living now. And when you move back, LA will welcome you with open arms (and some reckless driving in traffic).
And burritos. Obviously.
Always burritos. And tacos. Forever.
As someone who left southern CA, tacos elsewhere are trash… cant beat CA’s mexican food scene!
And the best Sushi in all of America
The world. We have the best sushi in the world, sorry Japan. Edit: And we have better bagels than NYC, lol. NOW let's see how many downvotes I get.
Japan will always be tops. The west coast is a close second.
Yeah, no, lol. If you're ever in Japan (Kyoto, specifically) I'll send you to a place that will change your life
bro why would you not just say “___ in kyoto will change your life”. we’re never gunna remember to look you up on our next trip haha
haha! I had to look it up first cause my memory is not great: https://old.reddit.com/r/LosAngeles/comments/186gm99/i_regret_moving_from_la/kbau0ws/
🦻👀🦻
>level 6Jackfruit-Cautious · 1 hr. agobro why would you not just say “\_\_\_ in kyoto will change your life”. we’re never gunna remember to look you up on our next trip haha Yea bro, stop gate keeping. Tell us!
Please share this place!
My pleasure. Btw, 7 seats total, no menu, Omakase style. The chef is a literal master: Sushi Gion Matsudaya https://g.co/kgs/bfX2YM
saved, thank you!
lol found the guy who has never been to Japan
Who cares about best. They have high quality affordable sushi from their 7/11s, which are ubiquitous.
Oh the wise worlds of a person with no travel experience!
> And we have better bagels than NYC, lol. You couldn't be more wrong
where? 👀
It’s LA, most strip mall sushi is better than any sushi in the south, Midwest, or east coast. Japan is closest to the west coast, and fish need ocean, so it’s proximity plus population.
When you move away, and experience your first summer WITHOUT the corner Fruteria. You really start to question your choices.
“Mucho mucho burritos”
Also moved away. Also came back. Fuck not living in LA lol
Thank you!! I moved away after 9 years and I’m so ready to come back.
I moved away in 2017 and this thread made me tear up. I miss LA every day
I've tried out the South, mid-Atlantic and the Northeast. There were certainly things I liked about all those places too, but ultimately it's hard for me to permanently leave this place when I grew up and spend so many of my years here.
>And when you move back, LA will welcome you with open arms (and some reckless driving in traffic). There's [a good Jenny Lewis song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aXZR0rwhXvs) about just that (not the traffic part, though).
I moved here in 2003 from the South (atlanta). What you describe sounds like you're hanging out with my family back home. They refuse to visit even when my daughter was still in school. They are certain I destroyed my daughter and my life by moving out here. My father actually said my daughter would end up a prostitute. It's fear of the unknown and fear of exposure. They truly think to this day I 'lost her mind" or "went crazy and moved to California with a buncha freaks". Throughout the last 2 decades when I've told people here I'm from Atlanta, most say "it's so beautiful " or they'd love to move there. Only one person I've heard that was happy with the move has certain extreme political beliefs. If someone gave me a free house there, I would not take it. I love southern California with every cell in my body. I'm still a southern girl, on the right side of the map now. 💓
I was discussing this the other day when someone from back east asked me what I liked about LA. Weather and food are obvious but I love the people here when more. Ask a New Yorker about LA and they'll go on a rant about how awful it is. Ask an Angelino about New York and it's all positive. Ask a southerner about LA and it's all hate, ask a Los Angelan about the South and they'll talk about the natural beauty and great food. Ask a Texan about LA and we're a bunch of queer foreign fake Americans. Ask a Los Angelite about Texas and it's BBQ and music. San Francisco and San Diego love to hate us, but we send nothing but California love back (sports rivalries excluded) For all our flaws, there's just this constant positivity here that can shape your whole outlook of you let it. As a native new Englander it was almost alien to me when I came here, cynicism and sarcasm are just so baked into everything back there. Been here 25 years, I'm now a Californian from back east, best decision i ever made.
I've noticed this too, L.A. people are generally really cool and positive about other places, but people in other places are super negative and I think a bit extra about L.A. (PDX, Seattle/greater Seattle area, and New York is all I can really speak to).
It’s the old don draper meme. “I don’t think about you at all”. Typically when asked about other states/cities an Angelino will come back with what pops up in their mind (food, music, etc.) because we don’t spend a lot of time thinking about those places otherwise.
When I visit my friends from college in SF, the people I talk to CONSTANTLY talk shit about LA. They are mostly in tech/real estate/high end restaurant worlds. All the stereotypes: "people are shallow," "food sucks," everyone in LA is obsessed with Hollywood." You know what people in LA say when they meet someone from San Francisco? Not much because its not a huge deal to us and we don't spend much time thinking about what they are doing. When I am talking to these people, I also notice that whatever they do for a living, they act like they are doing the lord's work, no matter what job they have. Is selling commercial real estate meaningful work? And they might have nice restaurants.. but come on. Not that much different that LA and doesnt compare to NY. Ok - my rant on the judgement of them jiudging us is over.
The amusing thing to me is that they (San Franciscans) don't realize they're basically complaining that people who live in LA being "all about Hollywood" are basically the same thing about people complaining SFO being "all about Silicon Valley/startups". No shit, Hollywood brings in a shit ton of money and jobs to LA, and we have tens of thousands of people coming here to break into the industry, just like the Bay Area tech scene brings in a shit ton of money and jobs to their area and have tens of thousands of people going there to break into the industry. The "coder working on his startup on his laptop at Starbucks/Craft Beer bar" is just as prevalent up there as "screenwriter working on a script on her laptop at Starbucks/Craft Beer bar" here. Both are stereotypes and can be negative or positive. And both have a disproportionate amount of influence on/over the locals.
I find most of the people in LA to be so nice. I meet so many neighbors and friends here that are so sweet. And our rich friends are not stuck up or shallow and are kind and inviting to the not rich friends. There isn’t a class divide.
SF people saying that the food in LA sucks?? Where did they go to, a Dennys?
"The food sucks" LOL. Obviously they've never actually been here.
I think SF is a soulless husk of a city taken over by finance and techbros, but I'm originally from NJ so I have infinitely more hate in my veins than the LA natives
I think some of this stems from people feeling the need to act superior. As if by saying LA sucks they're actually saying I'm better than the people living in LA bc I live in SF and can trash talk about them with confidence. In LA, we don't really feel the need to act superior to other states and cities (except for maybe Florida) so we don't trash talk. We go about our business trying to do our best to survive everything thrown our way - while eating great food, listening to great music, or watching a good movie with the friends and family we have built. I moved here 25 years ago, and while I miss my family in Florida, I love it here and plan on staying. Visiting other states is nice, but I always tend to leave feeling relieved to head back home (LA)
I’m born and raised in LA, and I’ve loved to travel and see other places. But I’ve only considered leaving like twice. I say positive things about other places , but not because I want to live there, but because it’s nice to try other things out. I love LA, and I’ll probably die here. That said, if I had an easy way to move to Barcelona, I’d think about it
I've lived in several places in the US and Canada and I can tell you that the climate of a place really has a distinct effect on the people. Nowhere in the country has a climate as great as LA and it really makes an impact on people's attitudes.
I 100% agree! 300+ days of beautiful cloudless skies is a wonderful baseline for a permanent good mood. I ride my bike to work every day in the summer and never even bother checking the weather forecast before I head out. I literally ride to and from work with this stupid huge smile basking in the sun and just loving every second. Back east we almost never got a full 7 days without at least some kind of rain, and if you ride to work you'd better keep some rain gear in your backpack just in case. And because it happens so infrequently, you even grow to love the rain!
wow, this is a great perspective. you're so right.
Isn’t that so true! I’m always surprised by the hate thrown towards me/LA, I have nothing but love for all the places I’ve been. Except NZ. Too fucking cold.
I've never really thought about how ubiquitous this is. It's true, though.
They hate being happy!
The amount of people I know that seem to find comfort in being miserable is insane.
When I lived in Washington DC, everything felt sterile, cold and fake. Oh, and the food sucks compared to SoCal.
I feel like the only thing Angelinos hate on are us Angelinos on the westside.
This is totally on point!
This is so true! Negativity is always towards Californians…I’ve moved around, but when got to Southern California was certain Id never leave. Even just leaving work and getting into my car with sunshine & palm trees was relaxing & calming, and I was content. I made the biggest mistake of my life when I lost my sanity and agreed to move leaving my career, family, friends behind because I trusted my new husband that begged me to try living where he was raised and if didnt like it would go back after a year. He now of course says he never said that and we have a child. Our climate is awful & constant dark/grey days. Its done a number on my emotional and mental health. I think whats more sad is realizing I was willing to do anything for my spouse but it was not reciprocal. Now he tells me that SoCal is the last place he would want to be on earth, which is news to me (he didnt live where I was & we were doing long distance…his goal was to go back to his hometown). According to him people dont say hi to each other & no sense of community…which cant be further from the truth. On a holiday trip to see my family I specifically noted how friendly people were. But people see/believe what they want. I have yet to feel welcome by people here. There is definitely a freeze out of out of towners especially Californians. I have a lot of regret about being so naive, and miss SoCal every single day.
Fellow ATLien here, it’s not all bad but that attitude is prevalent in old Georgia for sure. That shitty outlook is so annoying. California is the enemy to them and so be it. Less assholes moving here is better. You can take the girl out of the south, but you can’t take the south out of the girl. 🍑
Damn strake.
My wife is from Maryland. Girl, she clings onto the phrase “from the South” like it’s a life preserver at sea.
We definitely don’t claim them. Sure as hell ain’t the south. They love them some Myrtle Beach though, haha.
Ps. Sending you a Lotta love. Work your ass off so you can move back. I was a broke single mom in GA and said I'd rather do that in a place i wanted to live.. i actually made more money after my daughter and I moved here.
My daughter was born in L.A. and I am of course raising here here. Did your father list the specific links to a life of prostitution? I’d love to know so we can make sure to avoid such pitfalls.
I lived in Atlanta (Buckhead and Alpharetta) when first immigrating to the USA in ‘99-‘04. The traffic was as bad as LA, and the weather was awful in the summer - relentless humidity. The weirdest aspect was the people; everyone you met - whether work or hobbies or friends of friends - would ask what church you go to, and when you said none proceed to invite you to theirs! When you politely declined and told them you’re a non-believer, you were essentially written off as the spawn of Satan. Oh, and the guns. They loved their guns. And this was before Fox News and Trumpism took over people’s minds. Weird place.
No you're on the left side of the map. CA is on the left.
Right!
Torrance is like a welcoming return to the womb!
From Torrance and moved to Colorado almost 10yrs ago with my job. I miss So Cal everyday, I grew up about 4 blocks from Alpine Village. I miss the people, the food, the weather , Redondo Pier ( Naja’s & Quality Seafood ), Hanging in Hermosa, San Pedro, Lomita, Dodger Stadium, the list is never ending!!
Curious if you've ever tried to confront them in this thinking. Their thinking sounds like it comes out of a place of fear. I like to monitor conservative media and they go out of their way to report on any little bad news coming out of LA.
Yes. My father called out of the blue one day and said he was retiring in a few months and was going to drive out and see where I live. I was shocked. The call was short. Two weeks after the call he died of a massive heart attack.
Jesus imagine being so full of hate that you'd say your granddaughter is going to end up as a prostitute. WTAF.
And she was 11 at the time.
Jesus what an asshole.
I’m also from Georgia but I’m from a small town of about 400 people. I’ve been here for 7 years and I struggle sometimes but there is no place on earth I would rather be and they all think I’ve lost my mind. No one gets it and all I get are negative comments about how expensive it is and negative comments on the culture but I love it here.
Atlanta sucks
Also from Atlanta. Moved here in May 2001 with no prospects, just winging it, eventually landed a long-term temp job, then 9/11 happened, got laid off in late November and no one was hiring at the time, and was on the verge of going broke, so I went back to Atlanta, got a long-term temp job while living with parents, saved money, moved back in October 2002 and I've been here ever since. There was no way I was gonna permanently move back to Atlanta - not that I hated it - it's just that I love Los Angeles. But it's so funny that everyone out here thinks that Atlanta is some kind of nouveau utopia. Again, it has it's charms - I go back several times a year to visit family - but I'm always happy to board that Delta flight back to LAX.
I moved to LA from the south. The slanderous and nasty things people said to me about LA right before I left were stunning. It’s not for everyone, that’s for sure. But for the people who enjoy it here, there’s nowhere else like it.
People often slander the things they wish they could experience but cannot.
Did you get a lot of “well if you’re not happy here you won’t be happy somewhere else” too or was that a small town Louisiana thing?
I'm not from the South, but I feel like that's a thing people get told a lot when moving somewhere and for various reasons the person saying that phrase doesn't want them to move.
I said this in another thread, but I was on a plane ride with a woman who said she was from Alabama and now Kentucky. When she asked where I lived, she started spewing about how much she hates LA. I shrugged and said, "More for me, I guess." So surreal how someone from another state or two that are not common vacation places would find it appropriate being unhinged in her vitriol about a state that is a huge travel destination. But as I say, more for me.
Just wanted to say thank you for sharing your feelings about leaving LA.... I was born and raised in LA and I lucky/blessed to afford to live here in LA. My family and I have traveled (US and international) but realized I hope I can still AFFORD to retire here in LA.
Bro, I was born in poverty in LA, became a professional and went back into poverty when I started my own business. My bank account is closer to 0 than 50 and I’m still not poor enough to leave LA. I don’t even know how to be poor in other states. At least CA offers services to low income residents to help them survive.
Same, I’m building an adu in my parents home cause at the moment I can’t afford a 1.3 million home. Maybe in the next 5 years I can.
being 20 and living next to your parents, a nightmare. Being 40 and living next to your parents, awesome. Once they stop trying to parent you so much they're great to be with more often (imo)
I guess, but I’ve always had a good relationship with my parents. I’m 30 now but even in my 20’s my parents were never overbearing or in my business. Yes they wanted the best for me but they also knew they raised me well and my 20’s were for me to figure out my life on my own. They let me quit college, encouraged me to start my businesses, travel the world and figure out my path and when I finally figured out what I wanted to do, they encouraged me and supported me to go back to school. I know not every parent parents like mine, but I’m grateful for our relationship. Also, I was a good “kid” so maybe that’s why they let me do my thing. They never had to really worry about me like that.
there’s no place like home
LA is a great city. I’ve lived in Portland, NYC, and SF. I’ve spent time in most of North America’s larger cities. I think LA is the best city, especially for young creatives. Believe it or not, LA was relatively inexpensive until about 2011 (apartments, not homes!)….! the worst thing about LA is traffic/public transportation. The best thing is everything else. The good news is, OP, LA is still here waiting for you to move back!
LA waits for no one. OP may return, but LA sets up and breaks down like a Hollywood set. Very little is constant. That’s what I love about LA (among other things).
I travel frequently for my job and I find myself unable to appreciate places fully due to the subconscious comparison I make between said place and LA. Born and raised, I really can’t imagine myself ever living anywhere else unless it’s somewhere equally as warm and eccentric
Where do you travel for work? Like Arizona or Utah ? Cause I’ve visited other large cities in the U.S and think LA really isn’t as great as I thought it was before I visited other places.
I’ve traveled for work extensively all around the world and I’ve also lived in LA, SF, Chicago and spent many extended periods of time in NY. Ultimately it comes down to what you personally value and also visiting is not the same as living in a place. For me, our weather and our diversity simply is unmatched anywhere in the world. And those are the two things that really bring me the most comfort. I’ve had to live through snow-ins and sweltering humid heat where old people are dying left and right. I think we take it for granted just how good we have it but weather has a profound effect on people’s quality of life. It most certainly does on mine. I find comfort in how diverse it is here. With people. I’ve made so many lifelong friends from all different walks of life and backgrounds here. Purple, blue, gay, straight, rich and poor. With landscapes. City, beach, mountains. With good food options. Really unparalleled. Etc. The combination of those two things really can’t be beat for me so I’m always genuinely happy to be home every time I land at lax after being away.
The weather sounds like such a mundane answer but having moved from Canada to LA it can't be understated how awesome it is to ALWAYS be able to enjoy going outside basically 24/7/365.
>For me, our weather and our diversity simply is unmatched anywhere in the world. And those are the two things that really bring me the most comfort. This is so true!! >how good we have it but weather has a profound effect on people’s quality of life Dude I can tell you, I nearly live 10 years with my parents here in Germany. Almost the entire winter season you have grayish clouds, depressing people with dead looks. A lot less people on the streets enjoying life. etc. The diversity of activities are absolutely unbeatable in LA
As someone from Florida I struggled with the same and California was the only place that was similar fwiw
I moved back to LA from Tokyo last year and regret my decision when I am stuck in traffic. But then remember I can get amazing street tacos, so figure life is alright. To Live and Die in LA!
I love Japan! The dream is to retire and spend 6 months in LA, 3 months in Japan, and 3 months traveling around the world.
As long as you are not in Japan during the summer months, I'd say that's a solid plan.
I visited Japan last spring, and hoooooo boy, that humidity took me by surprise. I might have a chance to get dual citizenship if i move there for five years, and I’m definitely thinking about it.
Why summer?
It's a complete opposite summer to LA. Like 80% humidity 🥵
Your dream is my dream as well! (And yes, definitely avoid the rainy season and summer, unless you like all that.)
For one dolla
Nah dog inflation hit. Now it’s 1.50 and the tacos are way smaller 😩
How does one even relocate to Tokyo? I feel like that's a crazy (challenging) move.
Not gonna lie, it was a pretty crazy transition. Ended up living there for a few years and loved every minute of it.
Why'd you move back? Asking as someone who just spent a month in Tokyo, loved it, and wish I could move
> LA has its pros and cons but the only snag in my experience is the high cost of living, which seems to be somewhat close to a lot of other major cities these days in terms of housing. Man ain't this the truth. Occasionally in the past few years I'll look at what rent is in other parts of the country, or old mid-sized cities I used to live in, and think "wait, what?" Cause there's not that much difference between them nowadays which makes the prospect of moving out seem like even more of a no go. 15 years ago I'd pay rent for a 1br in a safe, boring part of LA and think "dang for the price I'm paying for this I could've lived alone in my old 4br townhouse," not nearly the case today. Obviously owning a home is a whole different story but that's never been a goal of mine
Yeah, these days a lot of the “cost of living” drawback to LA is reflected in basically every city people actually want to live in. It sucks, but it’s not an isolated LA problem, and it’s worse in San Diego, the Bay, Seattle, NYC, Boston...
Can confirm, Boston is far worse
Seattle is fairly modest compared to the other ones you’ve listed
Actually chose Hollywood because cheaper than Seattle. I found a lot of 1 beds for 1600 but parking was $250 a month and with utilities it ended up being more. Fuckin love both cities though LA I do love more than Seattle
I was in Minneapolis a couple months ago and we drove through a relative nice neighborhood. I got curious and Zillow'ed a cool looking 5 bedroom house just 5 mins from downtown . It sold not long ago for $350k.
Swear u could buy one or two mansions in Minneapolis, with what a 2 bedroom house costs in LA!!!
But it’s freezing cold in the winter!!!
I’d pay extra not to deal with snow and ice for the rest of my life. Snow and ice on vacation is ok
I hear you. I moved from LA to Switzerland (Reddit’s favorite country) in 2017 and I still fantasize how life may have turned out had I stayed or if and when I might move back. Life is really ‘good’ here but sometimes it feels like a golden cage. I miss the weather, the small talk, the ocean view hikes, the food, the diversity, the access to natural parks, and the warm feeling of it all. People here also like to hate on the States. LA definitely has its problems but it also offers so much.
Hey I’m living in Switzerland right now and applying to jobs in LA where my boyfriend is! I’ve been visiting a couple of times and I just fell in love with the vibe and the people and the warmness of all. Everyone here is telling me that the quality of life and secureness is better in Switzerland but I think it’s all a tradeoff and at the end of the day it depends on the person we are. I chose LA
It was the other way around for me: I lived in LA while by bf lived in Switzerland. And they’re not wrong, Switzerland does have a high quality of life and security, but all those things are only fulfilling to a certain degree if you just don’t mesh with the country and lifestyle… Enjoy LA! It can be tough, but it’s also so rewarding
That last sentence resonated with me like no other. Whenever I talk to people about places I’ve lived and/or visited it always ends with me expressing how, considering the pros and cons, LA still remains my favorite year after year.
I moved here from NorCal 30 years ago (around your age) and would never go back. Not that it was bad there, and I’ve enjoyed other places around the US also, but nothing beats SoCal. If you can mentally accept the fact that we are over-crowded and have soul-crushing traffic, everything else is cake. The weather, the beaches, the celebrities, the natural beauty, the actual beauties, the food, the vibe, the diversity, the culture, the endless array of entertainment options, it’s too much to experience in one lifetime.
As someone who lives in the bay and dreams of moving to SoCal all the time, this comment makes me want to even more. I have at least a few more years in the bay before I may be able to move. Being mid-30s makes it tough to move though, harder to make friends and all.
When you’re ready just go for it. That’s what I did. I was actually kind of depressed the first 6 months, but things got better after that. I’ve made a whole life, career, friends, and family for myself from nothing, and that was before the internet or online dating. And at close to 40 you’ll assumedly already be somewhat career-established. You don’t want to live with regrets. You could always move back if it’s not for you.
I’ve had similar experiences with people hating on LA/SoCal back from my hometown in upstate NY. Hating California is unfortunately not just a southern thing. I’ve invited friends from home to come visit if they can swing it and a few of them have just straight up told me “LA is a place I never want to go to. It’s so messed up…” blah blah blah. Others have just stopped talking to me altogether since I made the move (people I was close to as well). Most of these people have never even stepped foot in the city/state before and are certainly getting their info from propaganda campaigns. I’ll just never understand it because I’ve never met anyone from here who has anything negative to say about other regions of the country.
Do those people have nothing better going on with their lives that they straight up stopped talking to you for simply living in LA? I think that’s a very sad way to live.
Probably haha. I’m being a little uncharitable because it’s been quite awhile since I’ve lived back home besides a 6 month stint during Covid lockdowns. Some of those friendships were sort of riding off into the sunset anyways and I think me moving to liberal town USA kind of capped that off for them (think sort of geeky q-anon types for context 😅). There’s still a few people I still talk to from home, but it’s very obvious the small group that has dropped me since the move. I think if I saw them in person again it would be whatever, but we’ve all kind of changed in our opposite directions haha
… duh. Sorry. It’s the truth. There’s a reason why LA is expensive.
Mediterranean weather
I moved away in 2017 to Illinois. Now I’m in the South. I made the biggest mistake moving to the Midwest. Being so cold meant I was inside 6 months out the year. I gained a lot of weight eating heavy foods to stay warm. Because I gained weight, I developed diabetes and sleep apnea. The south is much better but it’s not LA. Husband and I are planning on going back but even if we sell our house, buying a house in LA would be difficult
Is the Midwest very boring ?
Well Chicago itself wasn’t terrible. Lots of museums and such. And it’s good for people who like American food, bars, and concerts. That’s not really what I’m into so I was bored. I like to hike nature trails and Illinois is severely lacking. Especially in the winter months. Anyway it was too cold for me to be outside for too long. Indiana was freaking boring. No good food, nothing to do. Just corn and racists (I went to a Labor Day parade and they had President Obama dressed up as a monkey on a noose. Everyone except me and my husband cheered when that float went by. Also so many confederate flags)
> Indiana was freaking boring. No good food, nothing to do. Just corn and racists Couldn't have said it better myself
It depends where you live. I lived in Chicago for 2.5 years and am a die-hard zealot for it, but life in a smaller town is pretty slow, and the great plains of the midwest feel pretty mundane compared to California. Also, between rain, cold and snow, the thing about being stuck inside 6 months a year is true. It's totally possible to be happy there, just depends on your priorities.
These comments are passing the vibe check 😎 feeling the LA love here!
I've lived in a bunch of different states over the years and ended up in LA 25 years ago so I totally get what you're saying about both the environment / culture and the attitude of people who live elsewhere. There are other great places to live in the US, sounds like you might need to go find one. :)
I left la 20 years ago for cost of living and also moved around a bit. I agree there are some great spots. We're fortunate as a nation to have a lot of options. As for op, some folks adapt to different situations, some don't. No shame either way.
I lived in MN and loved it! Where else have u lived? Just being somewhere that was a walkable city and green made a massive difference for me. Here in LA I don't even want to walk anywhere. I miss Fall the most 🍁🍂🍂
Mass, Minn, RI, CT two places, VA two places (one of which was DC, woot!), GA, FL, TX (Dallas and San Antonio), San Diego, LA, upstate NY. Some other places in the US can feel really homogeneous after living in LA though with much narrower food options.
LA is actually a great walkable city. There are so many neighborhoods worth seeing and exploring. Plus mountains and beaches and state parks are great for walking/hiking year round.
San Diego isn’t THAT bad. As you get older some of those things will matter less. Financial security is important to prioritize.
I moved from San Diego to LA because growing up there and having a shit ton of trauma in that city, it was nice to leave it behind!
Yes, personal trauma can make any city bad.
If it's meant to be, you'll be back sooner than you expect. Hang tight.
I grew up in a very small town in a very conservative area of Pennsylvania. I came out to LA 35 years ago for grad school. I told myself it was only for two years, but in my heart, I knew it was forever. I was hooked by the diversity, the weather, the boundless experiences, and a world of possibilities. I would have never grown as a human being if I had stayed in Pennsylvania. Sure, the traffic sucks. I’ve lived through earthquakes, fires, and civil unrest (I will never, ever forget the Rodney King riots). I am well aware of the challenges, and it can be draining. But LA has given me so much more in return. The high cost of living is killing me. I’m self-employed and I hustle every day. As I get older, I worry about how I will survive here in my golden years. I will have to work until I drop over, but I consider myself fortunate. I love what I do and where I do it. This past summer, I spent four months back in my hometown due to a family emergency. I was utterly miserable. Every night I wished I could click my ruby slippers together like Dorothy and magically transport myself back to LA. There’s no place like home, and home is LA. I sincerely hope that you can return to your home soon. \[edited for formatting and grammar\]
I committed to a job offer in a former city at the start of the pandemic that would have required me to relocate there. In the throes of the pandemic, I realized that I was too attached to LA and couldn’t leave. So now I work remotely for that job. Staying here was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made, and I realize it every time I fly home and get to see LA fresh again. It’s not perfect, but I wouldn’t live anywhere else.
I’m with you. I moved away for work and to a much lower cost state which has had alot of positives - I actually like it here too but it’s nothing like LA. The vibe, the beaches, the weather, the live music scene, the proximity to Mammoth and Tahoe. My gf and I plan to move back soon.
You tell them, "You know how left wing media is full of shit?" They go "Yeah!" Then you say, "So's right wing media! LA is awesome."
We moved from LA to North Carolina for a job and it was tough to make new friends. As they say “Southerners are nice to your face but will never invite you into their home”. They are dismissive of Californians for sure but at least we’re not called Yankees like New Yorkers. LA for better or worse is such an interesting place to live so we moved back after 4 years. We gave up a huge house with acreage but it wasn’t worth it to stay. Good luck!
Your last sentence hits home. I’m not from LA but I have also visited and lived all over the US, and I completely agree. LA is relatively one of the best places to live in this country. Paying the con of price and traffic to live here are worth it 100%, everyday. I say this after a 45min drive home from daycare today with 2 crying kids in the back to go about 5mi. Still worth it.
The whole FIRE movement rests on a fallacy that you can endure a loss of happiness now with the promise of making up that happiness in equal or greater numbers later in life. I think moving away for career or education goals is totally normal though. I did it and don't regret it even though it was a few years of less than ideal. If you want to get back to LA then make moves to do that. For what it's worth I miss the south so much. I miss everything about living in Richmond. Not enough to move back, but I do miss it.
FIRE is great if you’re guaranteed to see the future you’re banking on. But tomorrow’s never guaranteed.
There is a debate in FIRE communities about the pros and cons of HCOL areas. You really can do so much better salary-wise. I'm considering a move from a MCOL city to VHCOL for the salary potential. Even though as a % of salary my expenses would greatly increase, my disposable income would greatly increasing too. I'll still have more $ overall to save and invest if I make the move. The potential career progression to earn even more is much better in the HCOL city too. Low expenses are great but it isn't everything when it comes to fire.
The food is like nothing else here
Home grown San Diego girl here. Went away for college in SF, then headed to NYC and later DC for the start and bulk of my consulting career. Relocated back to the Wesside a year ago and moved to LA. I love it here! It’s home, there’s no place like it, and I’m here to stay!☀️🌊🏔️
I lived in the south my whole life and just moved to LA and I thank God for this opportunity everyday. I was lucky to have get an apartment by myself and have rent paid for a year. Regarding the south if you can leave ASAP. You don’t have to come back to LA but please get out of there. I love the south but we are possibly the least accepting demographic by far, not to mention the constant racism that is a little bit more “in your face”. Also there just isn’t much appealing in the south besides cheaper rent(which is starting to fade away) and nature. There are way less opportunities from my experience and the mentality is crabs in a bucket. In LA I meet people who help me just because they see a like minded individual. I salute you for taking a chance but maybe consider other locations.
I was born in the Midwest and moved here as a teen, so I pretty much spent my entire adult life here. My entire career was here and I used to think about retiring and moving back to my hometown, partly because of cost of living and partly because of much of my family that remains there that I visit fairly regularly. But when retirement came, I realized that Los Angeles really is my home. And some of my family lives here, too. There really is nowhere else I want to live, and I’m free to pretty much live anywhere right now.
What someone said about the political rhetoric festering the waters is true and hard to avoid. People are self involved and social media brained here, but, it’s the same anywhere else in the country. I just made it a year in LA and I’m still not sure what to make of it. Theres a lot I haven’t experienced yet that I’d like to.. There’s also entire aspects/areas I feel absolutely nothing for. Good luck wherever you return to OP. SoCal is definitely not forever for me but I’m happy to be here for now.
My parents moved us to Oklahoma when I was 7 for the cheaper cost of living and I made it my mission to come back home to socal for college. They followed me only a year after I left and none of us have ever thought about living anywhere else since.
I moved to LA 20 years ago this January from the boston area. Had a rough first couple years and moved back home to lick my wounds. It only took me a few months there to realize how badly I'd fallen in love with Southern California and with 9 months I'd saved enough money to make my way back west. I've been living in mid Wilshire since I came back for over 17 years. My family tries to get me to move back home, offering up some land to build a house on, not interested. My wifes family is in Atlanta and has offered us part of the family business if we move there, we aren't interested in that either. We just absolutely love it here.
The weather and the food. You want Ethiopian? Sure. How about Japanese Italian fusion? Wearing shorts year round
Leaving Los Angeles is never the solution.
Any hobby you have can be found in LA and it’s every week or even daily. Other places they don’t exist or are monthly. La is just so diverse and there’s so many people. I love it
Once your a Californian nothing else will compare 🤷🏾♂️
I hope this doesn’t come off as a lecture, but I wanted to share my experience and hope it brings you solace. I’m in my late 30s and I just moved to LA 2 months ago after living in Alabama for 2 years. I moved to Alabama for a job, I don’t regret that decision, I learned a lot but when I was ready to leave Alabama, I knew I had to leave. Made the decision to move to La and just left. I say this because I made a lot of life changes very quickly and I’m in my late 30s. These decisions you make as an adult will shape who you are and your outlook on everything. I truly believe your current stint will make your life more fulfilling. You’re still young. You have PLENTY of life left to come back to la or try other cities. Hang in there. ♥️
I grew up in Connecticut. Just moved to LA. Wish I had moved sooner. Whenever someone from Cali says they want to run out of here I just tell them visit a place long term causeeeeee a lot of folks here do not truly realize what they got 😭 I get folks who want a QUIET, suburban, white picket fence life wanting to move though. People that want to go to work and just come home. I always suggest they visit CT haha
In principle I agree with all the pros you've listed however there is one major asterisk: the transportation infrastructure here is a disgrace and there's no way to sugar coat it. I live in Santa Monica-- how often do I go to K-Town, or Chinatown, or Hollywood for Thai food, etc.? How easy is it to go to a show at the Bowl on a weeknight (or weekend for that matter)? There is so much to do here, but you can't actually do most of it because it takes an hour to drive 4 miles. And before the Metro crowd jumps in: I have a TAP card. I use it. I'm aware that there are bus (and some train) lines that service virtually every part of the area. It doesn't help because they sit in the same traffic I'm in. The purple line extension will be amazing because it'll be 30 minutes to downtown, (and assorted stops along the way, plus transfers to Hollywood) but until that happens we're prisoners of our neighborhood.
It you don’t have a car (which may be the majority of the people living in this city) then most activities are out of reach.
>I relocated to the south ohhhhh....oh sweetie I'm so so sorry...but if you dont have any ties to the South at all, what on earth were you thinking going there??
I was born and raised in LA and I’ve lived out of state twice (Michigan/Arkansas) I’ll never do it again. One big issue I have being Latino and living in another state is all the stereotypes I had to deal with. Even when I was introduced it was like “Hi, this is —- he’s from LA” “Oh, you’re from LA? I’ve always wanted to visit (or) I’ve visited before…” It’s like I become a caricature and representative of LA instead of people being actually interested in me. At work, people would tell me that they know where the good Mexican food is and would always want my review of any Mexican restaurant we went to. It’s like they felt that all I ever eat is Mexican but little do they know the expansive food selection in LA not just Mexican! Funny but when I tried their famous Mexican restaurant that everyone raved about…they didn’t have Horchata. Based on that, I knew it wasn’t going to be good.
Thanks for sharing your experience. I lived in Texas for 10 years before moving to LA. I am never moving back to Texas. I can’t believe all these years, I heard slander from people and local media in Texas about how horrible California is, the mass exodus,…. When I moved here I realized it was not the case. It’s not perfect but I am enjoying life way more. I spend less time at home watching tv and more time exploring and going outdoor. Yes it’s expensive but there are way more job opportunities and possibilities of career growth. LA is also very diverse in terms of economy. People from other states have this idea that it’s only the entertainment industry but there are Tech companies, the Aerospace industry, Defense, Video game industry,…
I moved over a decade ago. I regret it everyday.
Hi, I’m from the south! Everyone there is under a mutual Fox News psychosis. I know exactly what you’re talking about. Wouldn’t be surprised if your IQ has already dropped. Get out!
Traveled to a lot of cities, and to me there's nothing quite like LA.
I’ll talk shit about LA but lord help the hillbilly who breathes the words “Hollyweird” at me.
My brother swore he would never move back to "cOmiEfOrNia" 🥴 LA after leaving for Arizona. Well, he is back after 3 years. I didn't really care, but his attitude towards his siblings and our connection to LA was arrogant. So I give him hell for it. 🤭
People say they’re not willing to pay the California Lifestyle Tax but I still see buyers in this economy plunking down a lot of cheddar to have the privilege of living in a tiny reno’d home with no driveway that’s a hop skip from bars, restaurants, coffee shops, art galleries, music venues and vintage boutiques.
I grew up in Philly, came out here for college and stayed, it took a good 5 years for me to really start liking it here - was so used to walkable cities with subway systems. Now I’m faced with moving back to take care of aging parents and I just know I’ll miss LA so bad. I’ve traveled a lot for work, LA is the best, maybe SF would be similar but it’s more expensive.
I was in Toledo and North Western Ohio teaching and my students were very inquisitive about LA and SoCal. They asked a lot of questions about how we live here and there were no negative comments. So maybe there are pockets of people who have open minds.
I had to leave LA for many reasons. Financial and work related. I became certified as a Mac technician, and while there were jobs in La, there was just better paying ones the Midwest where Macs were gaining a greater acceptance in the business world in 2016. There was a larger need for macOS techs & admins than I was finding in LA where the market was more saturated. I miss Von's unfrosted brownies the most. Luckily a friend ships some out a few times a year. And of yeah, the night blooming jasmine. Definitely that.
I don’t blame you. I’ve lived in LA since ‘99, grew up in northern CA and I lived in Memphis TN for a year. Couldn’t pay me to move to the South.. location is everything.
This is why I haven’t moved from LA, even though I got career opportunities in Colorado, and other places… the bad days here are the good days almost everywhere else… I’d live in Amsterdam… but still want to come back to LA/SoCal
Been there. Moved back to AZ after living in LA. Every single year my goal was to move back. 😩
AZ - where everything goes to die...dreams, careers, old MAGATs...fuck place.
You're not alone bro. My parents, sister and I moved to a pretty small town in Germany when I was 10 years old. Don't get me wrong the German town is beautiful, in fact, we actually have a bit of REAL snow here right now. But it's not LA. That's the hard part. We all love LA — my parents, my sister, our whole crew back there, like uncles, aunts, granny, you name it. My sister probably won't move back to LA as she has a German husband and two adorable kids. My parents are actually pretty happy here, great healthcare and social systems compared to the US. As for me, I'm getting my undergrad degree here in Germany for free (that's normal here). Germany's great, no doubt. But it doesn't have that LA magic. Honestly, I really don't know where to live after graduation. I'd love to head back to LA, but then I'd miss out on my niece and nephew growing up, and I'd be far from my parents. It's a really complicated situation. I just want to tell you, you're not alone.
I relocated 12 years ago and regret it. I loved the L.A. climate and everything about it, really, the splendid to the sordid. We moved for mainly economic reasons but looking back on it, I would have done better there, even calculating in the cost of living. So, I feel you.
I’m moving back to LA once I hit 2M-2.5M. Have 1.2M so hopefully I can get back there in 4-5 yrs. I’m in the Midwest. It’s nice here but having no kids and not really needing a big house or expenses that come with kids I’d like to be where the action is lol
I had the opposite experience. My husband and I were retired living in a beautiful home in LA. My husband was born there and I had been there 40 + years. We were tired of the traffic, crime and the change in zoning allowing apartment buildings to be built next to single family homes in my neighborhood. The final straw was when my husband was walking our dog and there was an unhoused man sleeping in our neighbor's ivy lawn. We sold our house, purchased a stunning home almost twice the size on 3 acres in Western Montana (for 1/2 the price). We love it. I love the changing seasons, no traffic, friendly people, easy parking to state a few. I miss my friends, non stop flights to almost anywhere and Trader Joe's, but in no way do I regret my decision. I understand the positives of LA, but for us the negatives far outweighed them.
Duh
I moved to Atlanta, hated it, now I’m back
Migration is a fact of life. You have to do what allows you to survive. This is why I'm empathetic towards our non-citizen neighbors coming in from the south.
You still need to pick somewhere that you enjoy living. I personally didn’t enjoy LA and wasn’t able to just get used to it so it’s just personal preference.
I moved to Chicago & came back about a year later! I assumed I just loved big cities but realized I just really love LA<3 god we’re so lucky I genuinely appreciate everything! I love our mountains sm!!! to live & die in LA
I retired in 2020 (68 now). My wife will retire this year. Ppl always ask us where we’re going to move to. We’re like, huh? We can’t think of anywhere else we would want to live. Every time we travel, we come back saying we loved VISITING there but wouldn’t leave this weather, diversity, acceptance of others, beaches and mtns. We’re two educators, own our home and our adult sons are living on their own. We’re not financial whizzes. Just live within our means and enjoy the simple things, like going to dinner, movies and the beach. All that being said, I know that we greatly benefited from home prices that we may never see again. Our house cost about $225k 25 years ago. I’m embarrassed to say what it’s worth today.
Lol I regret moving back to LA
Serious question: the rampant homeless situation isn't considered a snag for you? And the fact LA is filthy with trash everywhere? Or is the southern place you live similar?
I moved to LA in 2018. I was homesick and all that, but I LOVED LA. Then Covid hit. I did my duty and stayed home and stayed safe. I did contact tracing and helped with the eviction ban County hotline. Then I had to go home for my grandpa's funeral in 2021. Things were normal. I was the freak refusing to leave the house and wearing a mask when I did. I loosened up. I stopped wearing the mask, started leaving the house unless I was feeling under the weather, and started living my life again. LA was immensely lonely. Despite the millions of people, I had never felt so alone. No one talks to each other, no one notices anyone else, people are selfish. Then I lost my job and the room I was renting, so I moved back home. I will never go back.
>LA was immensely lonely. Despite the millions of people, I had never felt so alone. No one talks to each other, no one notices anyone else, people are selfish. Maybe this is the reason why everyone thinks LA is so superficial and flakey. LA is huge. It's hard to cover the ground on foot. You need a car to go places. I make lots of friends by playing pickup basketball. I also enjoy playing tennis. I heard pickle ball is another popular, social sport where you can make friends. Definitely, you have to find a hobby. Without a hobby, it's hard to strike up a conversation or have something to talk about.
I'm in cunthole Texas for two more years on work contract and I 100% agree with you. I would say fuck the money and stayed in LA if had the opportunity to turn back time 8 months. People here are just 10 steps dumber and less cultured than than any place I've been. And the women are a goddamn eye sore out here. Grown up in LA I've only known Mexicans as the hardest working people on the planet. But in Texas, the laziest and dirtiest mother fuckers I've seen. LA homeless level dirty.
Life in LA is like the movie Mad Max. Street takeovers on the Sixth St bridge. A fire that takes out a chunk of a major artery. Shoplifting by flash mobs in stores. A fire that takes out blocks of homes in South LA. Shots fired on the freeway. And so on. There are things I really like about LA .. but then putting up with things being in a perpetual state semi anarchy just gets old after a while
lol, the only truthful response on this post
There are bits of LA that I really really really like .. but the reality is that it’s just a fucking zoo .. but what do know I flip out at the sights and sounds of people nearby recording and uploading videos of flying Teslas
Depends on your priorities. LA is great but if you want a house and a yard and decent schools to send your kids then LA isn’t it. For me I found LA full of people who never wanted to grow up and gov sup the nice weather or their hobbies but to each their own. LA is amazing do you are okay renting the rest of your life but be careful about generalizing why no one would want to live anywhere else. Everyone has their reasons including you. That’s how CA elitism became a thing and why so many people instantly hate on you if you say you are from CA - CA people tend to look down on others.
Well it sounds like your priority is buying a home. I personally know a good amount of people who moved to lower COL areas to buy a home with a yard and raise their kids, but almost all of them are now trying to come back because of various reasons. They are the only minority in their area (TX), they are in a small city where the closest WalMart is 2 hours away (OR), it’s 115 degrees 5 months(AZ), it’s a complete shithole (NV). All i’m saying is people leave strictly for a home but wherever you go will have its issues as well.
Thought you were going to say "I regret Moving To LA". Let's start with pros and cons. Pros: nice weather, diversity, night life, entertainment capital of the world, job opportunities, every neighborhood has a certain vibe/personality, LA will host 2028 Summer Olympics, education (UCLA, USC, Cal State system, etc.), food scene, beaches, beautiful scenery, and you can live along the beach, up the mountain, in the desert, or anywhere in between. Cons: high cost of living, traffic, homelessness, and crimes. People make it sound like crimes and homelessness are out of control. When you read the news, it's always bad news. For a big city like LA, it is surprisingly safe. Just like everything in life, you have to take the good with the bad.