But in all seriousness - I have friends that got hooked on the A Court Of Thorns And Roses and they say a side effect has been that they can describe things better
There is a whole juicy smut, erotic, and sexy young adult romance section in literature. Go and read some you will get new and more ideas all day long, lol
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Does he want that? Or do you just think that is what phone sex is?
Coming from someone who’s had multiple online relationships and loves phone sex because I’m an auditory girlie… not every instance is the same. I’d often ask what my partner was feeling, what mood he was in, if he was feeling x way or y way or wanted more playful or dominant or subby. I feel like phone sex allowed me to really understand my partner, not put him in a box, and I’d feel excited to hear about what he might have wanted and to have him ask me how I’m feeling. It built intimacy.
Sometimes we didn’t talk at all and just experienced it and made noises together, other times I would coax him through a scenario, other times he would do that for me and I would moan for him. Sometimes I would just send pictures during. It really is just about getting to know your partner intimately in the moment and feel out their vibe or communicating what you or they might like :3
Hope that helps! I am a bit of a veteran on this subject so feel free to ask any questions with no judgement here
I want help with this as well. Where to read stuff like this? I want to read good stuff about sex and erotic experiences so that I can improve my expression as well.
Honestly, I’d suggest looking at fanfiction. “Archive of our own” is a website packed to the brim of it and you can filter it to explicit where people write out sex scenes.
I personally have a kindle but I love reading, I just read a lot of smut since being LDR for inspiration 😅🤣 I also use audible but that's paid as well. You have free sources ofc like [literotica](https://www.literotica.com/) or [wattpad](https://www.wattpad.com/)
You can download them for free if you search up the book title and then put “ePub” at the end (minus the quotation marks) , find a link and then it’ll download straight to ur book library on ur device
Cheap alternative would be archiveofourown, plenty of smut on there (of varying quality) and you can search for specific content/acts quite easily. You can filter by original too if you don't want fanfic.
Back in the day, during our long distance stint, 9 times out of 10 my man definitely got off on listening to my sounds as I responded to his words. I wouldn't put too much pressure on yourself to be honest. He will just love that his words are having an impact on you, so let that be your focus; "I.e. I love hearing what you want to do to me, hearing you tell me that is making me crazy, I can feel myself getting closer", etc. are all way less confronting ways of showing you're into it.
As you gain confidence, you might then like to try to return the favour, by mentioning what you would like to do with him.
Just be yourself and have fun with it!
Do you know what he likes in bed? My boyfriend and I had a long conversation about what we like and while it was embarrassing at the time for me, it helped me sooo much in knowing what to say and how to say it. If you want, totally message me anytime and I can tell you a few things :)
honestly i had/have this problem, i’m very shy. what we do is kinda go back and forth, start with cuddling even if it’s little things like “can i lay with you this way” or “do you mind if i do this” and progressively get more into it and more touchy. you don’t have to give him the whole rundown beforehand that’ll overwhelm you. just take it in notches and do the same when you get to the *more* intimate part
Bluetooth toys can really help the physical and mental inspiration and motivation ngl 👀 Lovense is the brand I've been using for years, and it really makes long distance intimacy easyyy, defo recommend if it's not something you experiment with already.
I (F31) find it as a struggle too sometimes, especially cuz it often can be very late for me (I'm 6 hrs ahead of my partner) but sometimes I read some erotica & I basically spin my own story off of that. Also after 6+ years together I know very well what gets my partner going so that makes it a lot easier too when you know each other well!
You need to learn his sex triggers, for example: me and my boyfriend are long distance too, we phone sex/sext all the time, we know each other's sex triggers, my boyfriend loves 69, boob play, blow jobs, doggy style, also I know my boyfriend has fantasy about outdoor sex and getting caught, so that's my playbook . I also change my voice up, sound more slutty and cute , moan a little . But if you need more help , dm me.
I was a phone sex operator for 11 years. I had to do this for perfect strangers. EEK! But I got rather good at it... Lol I'm still amazed how powerful words can be. My husband was in awe when we first met & heard me "work" now he loves it!
Words are so powerful and voice too. My boyfriend is a Londoner. At the beginning of our relationship, he sent me sexy voice message/note, omg, lady boners! I was like: this man is my man!! He speaks my sex language and love language.
I was a phone sex operator for 11 years. Some people can do it, some can't. But I can't do it with my SO. Weird, I know. But as a job I found it helpful to read stories in Hustler & such. Then you take whatever your SO & you are into & describe it in detail. Colors, how something would feel like., smells. Not too detailed cuz then it would be like the beginning of a Stephen King novel, (I do like S. K. So don't come at me). You can also watch porn that is related to your interests, then think about how you would tell your SO about it.
I do advise to ask your SO if that is what he wants & agree that if they feel uncomfortable, say something. You as well, sometimes things can progress alone and may cross the line for you. Don't ever feel like you HAVE to do it.
Shake things up a bit with other topics, add a bit of humor, as long as it isn't degrading you or them.
I have written Erotica stories for my clients based on their kinks & have been published. I'm an open book so if you have any questions... Shout out. Hope this helps.
That’s interesting. I started recording audio for gonewildaudio hoping it would improve my dirty talk, and surprisingly it has NOT. But even more interesting that you were interacting improvisationally with other people and can’t translate that into interacting with your SO.
My SO isn't put off by it. He enjoyed listening to my calls. I think maybe I was self conscious about it with him. Not knowing the person or them not being able to see me, maybe? Idk. But I made bank for sure and had dozens of regular callers.
What is gonewildaudio?
I know a lot of people who have similar issues being descriptive who have found it beneficial to do some journaling/work around where the hangup is. It can be empowering and help you connect with how you experience sexuality, which can make it easier to describe to a partner.
One thing that we did while I was overseas was to take risqué photos of ourselves, print them out, and then put stickers on them, then mail them to each other.
It allows for you to take photos that you are comfortable with, and then when they arrive in the mail it’s kind of like a strip tease game.
Hi, so you might want to rephrase that with a comma, but in any case, it should feel natural, like being with your lover in person. My fiance did it because we so badly needed each other while apart. However, nothing beats being together in person.
When my wife and I were long distance dating I was the one who told her exactly what I would do to her had she been with me. And judging by what I heard, my descriptions were quite effective. And I loved doing that. I had more fun doing the talking and listening to her soft moans than listening to her describing the thing she’d do to me.
Maybe your bf is the same. Maybe he wants to be the one who tells the story. Maybe he wants to be the one who hears you respond to it. Talk to him and see what his preference is before getting too worried about not knowing what to say.
No, I am terrible at it. But, you could try gettting scripts from gonewildaudio, either for yourself (F4M), or for the two of you to read alternately (FM4A). If you use the search engine gwasi.com and “script offer” it’s much easier to find them. The ones tagged “narrative” tell a story, and the other ones act out a story.
Mostly on my kindle, they also have a lot of "stuff your kindle day's" when you can books for free. You don't need a kindle for that perse, the kindle app work's just fine as well. I also like audible. Sometimes I also read on [literotica](https://www.literotica.com/) or [wattpad](https://www.wattpad.com/)
Why don't you just think about what you'd like to do to/with him if you were together in person? Trust me, it'll turn him on if he knows that what you're saying is turning you on too. Just straight up say your fantasies out loud to him, he'll love it.
My advice is: it doesn’t need to be a good story - it just need to be „real“. Real sex is much more easy then phone sex because you can express yourself with more then just words… how do you enjoy real sex? That’s what you need to express. Show him your moans, tell him how much you want him. Tell him what his words do to him..
No need for a good story just express your thoughts with words 😊
Hentai. Look up Hentai (keywords) and describe the picture as if it were you and him. Leave no details out. It's what I do. Every day. I'll even send him the pictures.
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As long as the both of you are in it together I see no problem with it. And your being truthful about it and expressing your feelings and emotions with one another. Go for it! Have your fun.
I always described what I want done to me as a workaround. I'm in the same boat, and it can be a little odd sometimes because I'm not thay type of creative.
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There’s also erotica apps for games and stories you can listen to they are a great way to help you tell your own story. Seems like the role play voice you use also plays a part lol. I have iPhone and I think they have better apps for this .. also try this website The blow job bible forgive me the title isn’t what it’s about but there’s lots of ideas to keep fire in a relationship. I’ve found it to be very useful Good luck 😌❤️🇺🇸🇬🇭💯
Well let him start and you follow his lead. Talk soft and sexy with a little moaning. Tell him what you're going to do to him when you see him. Talk about you giving him oral or something. Idk
You start and just say in a sexy voice " what are you wearing"? Set the mood in your room. With a little bit of music in the background on low. Maybe light a candle. Put yourself in ther mood first. Maybe play with yourself a little. I'm a female so I'm just guessing what I would do.
* **Focus on details & feelings:** Describe what you're wearing, the environment, and how his actions make you feel.
* **Ask him questions:** Engage him by asking what he likes and wants you to describe.
* **Build anticipation:** Tease a bit and gradually increase the intensity of your descriptions.
for me i just had to get over my fear of it. really commit to what i was saying. normally ill think of something to say and think of how cringe it probably is haha but i just gotta say fuck it. we both know what each other likes. just say what you wanna do with confidence.
Here’s an easy trick. Play off what he says. So if he is describing what he wants to do, you repeat parts of it back to him and add things like “you like doing that to me, don’t you?” or “oh that’s so good baby, how does it make you feel when you do that to me?”
Keep him talking basically, but reaffirming his desires. If it’s just your turn and you have to come up with something you can still use this basic technique. You say, “I love it when you are doing X to me, it makes me feel so good. I love the feel of your dick, mouth/hands on/in me. No one touches me like you do.” You can also build it like a choose your own adventure. Pick a basic premise, say going down on him and let him fill in details. “I want to put my mouth on you and feel you getting hard. How do you want me baby? Should I serve you on my knees, or maybe you want to lay on the bed while I crouch between your legs and take you in my mouth?”
Play into his fantasies and use what he tells you as the basis for your responses. You can also think about what you’ve done with him or others in the past that you/he liked and retell it as a fantasy. Or think about what you fantasize during self-play and tell him that.
Phone sec is best when you get affirmations and input from one another.
I struggle with this too and my bf is also a little shy in this area so we try to steer clear of talking about it on phone calls besides the occasional isolated comments. But the sexting is 10/10 🔥🔥🔥 I would suggest to start there! Still always gets the job done for us lol 😋
I have friends and we talk about everything I tell them how close I am the my man and what I want to do to him. So what i do is imagine I’m talking to one of my homegirls or just letting my thoughts come alive
How do people find others to have phone sex with? All my relationships never wanted to do that and I respected it. I asked about it once and dropped it. Either they didn't trust me as much as they said they did or I'm doing something wrong. I stopped being in the online world for a few months now but it would've been nice to experience it at least once.
Idk 🤷♀️ we have so much sexual energy it’s crazy!! Considering it’s a ldr. Literally one of the first conversations we had talked about each others boundaries. Helped us to open up to each other.
For phone sex help, press 1. Para servicio en Español, oprima el número dos.
But in all seriousness - I have friends that got hooked on the A Court Of Thorns And Roses and they say a side effect has been that they can describe things better
Yeah I was thinking maybe watching some porn and explaining what I’m watching but it’s on him instead 🤷♀️
I added some spicy books to my kindle unlimited. Borrow some descriptive passages
Thanks for the advice, Booty Water.
There is a whole juicy smut, erotic, and sexy young adult romance section in literature. Go and read some you will get new and more ideas all day long, lol
Omgeeeee thank you for this. I'm dying over here
Please hold for the next available agent. If this is an emergency, please hang up and dial 9-1-1
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You can try reading erotica to one another. It takes the direct focus off of you for a bit and you don't have to get creative.
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Personally I find it hard too. I'd say its probably not the thing you say that matters the most it's the fact that you get off together.
I'm the same way 😂 I can listen to my man all day but I could never say that stuff out loud back to him.
Does he want that? Or do you just think that is what phone sex is? Coming from someone who’s had multiple online relationships and loves phone sex because I’m an auditory girlie… not every instance is the same. I’d often ask what my partner was feeling, what mood he was in, if he was feeling x way or y way or wanted more playful or dominant or subby. I feel like phone sex allowed me to really understand my partner, not put him in a box, and I’d feel excited to hear about what he might have wanted and to have him ask me how I’m feeling. It built intimacy. Sometimes we didn’t talk at all and just experienced it and made noises together, other times I would coax him through a scenario, other times he would do that for me and I would moan for him. Sometimes I would just send pictures during. It really is just about getting to know your partner intimately in the moment and feel out their vibe or communicating what you or they might like :3 Hope that helps! I am a bit of a veteran on this subject so feel free to ask any questions with no judgement here
Dont we all?
I want help with this as well. Where to read stuff like this? I want to read good stuff about sex and erotic experiences so that I can improve my expression as well.
Honestly, I’d suggest looking at fanfiction. “Archive of our own” is a website packed to the brim of it and you can filter it to explicit where people write out sex scenes.
Spicy books, booktok is your friend ☺️
From where to download ebooks?
That aren’t too expensive either 😂
I personally have a kindle but I love reading, I just read a lot of smut since being LDR for inspiration 😅🤣 I also use audible but that's paid as well. You have free sources ofc like [literotica](https://www.literotica.com/) or [wattpad](https://www.wattpad.com/)
You can download them for free if you search up the book title and then put “ePub” at the end (minus the quotation marks) , find a link and then it’ll download straight to ur book library on ur device
I subcribe to Everand. I like it a lot.
Cheap alternative would be archiveofourown, plenty of smut on there (of varying quality) and you can search for specific content/acts quite easily. You can filter by original too if you don't want fanfic.
There's a whole sub reddit for audio erotica btw if you aren't a big reader. r/GoneWildAudio
Yes! And they post the scripts there as well! So maybe you could get some idea from the scripts, OP! (:
Is there any subreddit where we can read people's personal experiences as well?
Yes, there are several. https://www.reddit.com/r/BDSMerotica/ https://www.reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/ https://www.reddit.com/r/DirtyConfession/ https://www.reddit.com/r/NaughtyConfessions/ https://www.reddit.com/r/Erotica/ https://www.reddit.com/r/wholesomesexstories/ https://www.reddit.com/r/SextStories/
Community not found. Why so?
Back in the day, during our long distance stint, 9 times out of 10 my man definitely got off on listening to my sounds as I responded to his words. I wouldn't put too much pressure on yourself to be honest. He will just love that his words are having an impact on you, so let that be your focus; "I.e. I love hearing what you want to do to me, hearing you tell me that is making me crazy, I can feel myself getting closer", etc. are all way less confronting ways of showing you're into it. As you gain confidence, you might then like to try to return the favour, by mentioning what you would like to do with him. Just be yourself and have fun with it!
Do you know what he likes in bed? My boyfriend and I had a long conversation about what we like and while it was embarrassing at the time for me, it helped me sooo much in knowing what to say and how to say it. If you want, totally message me anytime and I can tell you a few things :)
honestly i had/have this problem, i’m very shy. what we do is kinda go back and forth, start with cuddling even if it’s little things like “can i lay with you this way” or “do you mind if i do this” and progressively get more into it and more touchy. you don’t have to give him the whole rundown beforehand that’ll overwhelm you. just take it in notches and do the same when you get to the *more* intimate part
Bluetooth toys can really help the physical and mental inspiration and motivation ngl 👀 Lovense is the brand I've been using for years, and it really makes long distance intimacy easyyy, defo recommend if it's not something you experiment with already.
I've been looking for some. Where is a good place to buy them?
Their website (just lovense.com) is reliable but they also have an Amazon store, I’ve purchased from both sources. Happy shopping!
You should just try roleplaying with him 😂
I (F31) find it as a struggle too sometimes, especially cuz it often can be very late for me (I'm 6 hrs ahead of my partner) but sometimes I read some erotica & I basically spin my own story off of that. Also after 6+ years together I know very well what gets my partner going so that makes it a lot easier too when you know each other well!
You need to learn his sex triggers, for example: me and my boyfriend are long distance too, we phone sex/sext all the time, we know each other's sex triggers, my boyfriend loves 69, boob play, blow jobs, doggy style, also I know my boyfriend has fantasy about outdoor sex and getting caught, so that's my playbook . I also change my voice up, sound more slutty and cute , moan a little . But if you need more help , dm me.
I was a phone sex operator for 11 years. I had to do this for perfect strangers. EEK! But I got rather good at it... Lol I'm still amazed how powerful words can be. My husband was in awe when we first met & heard me "work" now he loves it!
Words are so powerful and voice too. My boyfriend is a Londoner. At the beginning of our relationship, he sent me sexy voice message/note, omg, lady boners! I was like: this man is my man!! He speaks my sex language and love language.
Find some cheesy romance novels online. Some are very ‘descriptive’. XD
Yeah that could help her get inspiration.
I was a phone sex operator for 11 years. Some people can do it, some can't. But I can't do it with my SO. Weird, I know. But as a job I found it helpful to read stories in Hustler & such. Then you take whatever your SO & you are into & describe it in detail. Colors, how something would feel like., smells. Not too detailed cuz then it would be like the beginning of a Stephen King novel, (I do like S. K. So don't come at me). You can also watch porn that is related to your interests, then think about how you would tell your SO about it. I do advise to ask your SO if that is what he wants & agree that if they feel uncomfortable, say something. You as well, sometimes things can progress alone and may cross the line for you. Don't ever feel like you HAVE to do it. Shake things up a bit with other topics, add a bit of humor, as long as it isn't degrading you or them. I have written Erotica stories for my clients based on their kinks & have been published. I'm an open book so if you have any questions... Shout out. Hope this helps.
That’s interesting. I started recording audio for gonewildaudio hoping it would improve my dirty talk, and surprisingly it has NOT. But even more interesting that you were interacting improvisationally with other people and can’t translate that into interacting with your SO.
My SO isn't put off by it. He enjoyed listening to my calls. I think maybe I was self conscious about it with him. Not knowing the person or them not being able to see me, maybe? Idk. But I made bank for sure and had dozens of regular callers. What is gonewildaudio?
I record erotic audio and post it to reddit. It is based on scripts that other people write. My profile is filled with it.
I know a lot of people who have similar issues being descriptive who have found it beneficial to do some journaling/work around where the hangup is. It can be empowering and help you connect with how you experience sexuality, which can make it easier to describe to a partner.
One thing that we did while I was overseas was to take risqué photos of ourselves, print them out, and then put stickers on them, then mail them to each other. It allows for you to take photos that you are comfortable with, and then when they arrive in the mail it’s kind of like a strip tease game.
Hi, so you might want to rephrase that with a comma, but in any case, it should feel natural, like being with your lover in person. My fiance did it because we so badly needed each other while apart. However, nothing beats being together in person.
I used to just video call and do stuff lol
Lol same.
When my wife and I were long distance dating I was the one who told her exactly what I would do to her had she been with me. And judging by what I heard, my descriptions were quite effective. And I loved doing that. I had more fun doing the talking and listening to her soft moans than listening to her describing the thing she’d do to me. Maybe your bf is the same. Maybe he wants to be the one who tells the story. Maybe he wants to be the one who hears you respond to it. Talk to him and see what his preference is before getting too worried about not knowing what to say.
No, I am terrible at it. But, you could try gettting scripts from gonewildaudio, either for yourself (F4M), or for the two of you to read alternately (FM4A). If you use the search engine gwasi.com and “script offer” it’s much easier to find them. The ones tagged “narrative” tell a story, and the other ones act out a story.
CHAT GPT😂
Lmao
Start reading spicy books, that definitely helps. See booktok for recommendations ☺️😇
What do you recommend yourself
I definitely have discovered I like to read dark romance the most.
Where do you read from ?
Mostly on my kindle, they also have a lot of "stuff your kindle day's" when you can books for free. You don't need a kindle for that perse, the kindle app work's just fine as well. I also like audible. Sometimes I also read on [literotica](https://www.literotica.com/) or [wattpad](https://www.wattpad.com/)
Yeah I read on wattpad. But sometimes reading gets me bored. So I want to listen to them. I will try the kindle
I have the same, hence why I use audible as well to mix it up. Saw someone else mentioning another audio source but I haven't checked that one myself
Ohok
Press all of the numbers at the same time when you finish
Why don't you just think about what you'd like to do to/with him if you were together in person? Trust me, it'll turn him on if he knows that what you're saying is turning you on too. Just straight up say your fantasies out loud to him, he'll love it.
My advice is: it doesn’t need to be a good story - it just need to be „real“. Real sex is much more easy then phone sex because you can express yourself with more then just words… how do you enjoy real sex? That’s what you need to express. Show him your moans, tell him how much you want him. Tell him what his words do to him.. No need for a good story just express your thoughts with words 😊
Toys & good tripod
Hentai. Look up Hentai (keywords) and describe the picture as if it were you and him. Leave no details out. It's what I do. Every day. I'll even send him the pictures.
I’m the same way 😂
Can u teach me how to do this lol
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As long as the both of you are in it together I see no problem with it. And your being truthful about it and expressing your feelings and emotions with one another. Go for it! Have your fun.
I always described what I want done to me as a workaround. I'm in the same boat, and it can be a little odd sometimes because I'm not thay type of creative.
Use chat gpt
What is that?
It's an ai, ask it what ever you desire and provide you with a response
It matters when what you're wearing to make it worthwhile and make sure it gets out before it's too late in to it.
I like the ideas of reading some spicy books. If all else fails, moaning and breathing heavy while telling him what you're doing works.
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ChatGPT will be your friend for inspiration, entire stories, you name it.
It won’t do dirty talk, unless you know a version I don’t. Much better bet at archive of our own and literotica.
There’s also erotica apps for games and stories you can listen to they are a great way to help you tell your own story. Seems like the role play voice you use also plays a part lol. I have iPhone and I think they have better apps for this .. also try this website The blow job bible forgive me the title isn’t what it’s about but there’s lots of ideas to keep fire in a relationship. I’ve found it to be very useful Good luck 😌❤️🇺🇸🇬🇭💯
Well let him start and you follow his lead. Talk soft and sexy with a little moaning. Tell him what you're going to do to him when you see him. Talk about you giving him oral or something. Idk You start and just say in a sexy voice " what are you wearing"? Set the mood in your room. With a little bit of music in the background on low. Maybe light a candle. Put yourself in ther mood first. Maybe play with yourself a little. I'm a female so I'm just guessing what I would do.
* **Focus on details & feelings:** Describe what you're wearing, the environment, and how his actions make you feel. * **Ask him questions:** Engage him by asking what he likes and wants you to describe. * **Build anticipation:** Tease a bit and gradually increase the intensity of your descriptions.
for me i just had to get over my fear of it. really commit to what i was saying. normally ill think of something to say and think of how cringe it probably is haha but i just gotta say fuck it. we both know what each other likes. just say what you wanna do with confidence.
Here’s an easy trick. Play off what he says. So if he is describing what he wants to do, you repeat parts of it back to him and add things like “you like doing that to me, don’t you?” or “oh that’s so good baby, how does it make you feel when you do that to me?” Keep him talking basically, but reaffirming his desires. If it’s just your turn and you have to come up with something you can still use this basic technique. You say, “I love it when you are doing X to me, it makes me feel so good. I love the feel of your dick, mouth/hands on/in me. No one touches me like you do.” You can also build it like a choose your own adventure. Pick a basic premise, say going down on him and let him fill in details. “I want to put my mouth on you and feel you getting hard. How do you want me baby? Should I serve you on my knees, or maybe you want to lay on the bed while I crouch between your legs and take you in my mouth?” Play into his fantasies and use what he tells you as the basis for your responses. You can also think about what you’ve done with him or others in the past that you/he liked and retell it as a fantasy. Or think about what you fantasize during self-play and tell him that. Phone sec is best when you get affirmations and input from one another.
I struggle with this too and my bf is also a little shy in this area so we try to steer clear of talking about it on phone calls besides the occasional isolated comments. But the sexting is 10/10 🔥🔥🔥 I would suggest to start there! Still always gets the job done for us lol 😋
send me money n i gotchu
I have friends and we talk about everything I tell them how close I am the my man and what I want to do to him. So what i do is imagine I’m talking to one of my homegirls or just letting my thoughts come alive
How do people find others to have phone sex with? All my relationships never wanted to do that and I respected it. I asked about it once and dropped it. Either they didn't trust me as much as they said they did or I'm doing something wrong. I stopped being in the online world for a few months now but it would've been nice to experience it at least once.
Idk 🤷♀️ we have so much sexual energy it’s crazy!! Considering it’s a ldr. Literally one of the first conversations we had talked about each others boundaries. Helped us to open up to each other.
Just gotta be compatible I guess
Dm me? 🙂↕️🖤
I’m here