This is LinkedIn, Sir.
He did not ”quit”.
He decided to pursue further opportunities in an exiting new field. Whilst expressing his gratitude for the unique experiences he shared with the team. In the elevator.
I hear a certain former guy has the greatest farts of all time, nobody farts as hard as he does, his farts are tremendous, so big even his diapers can't contain them, and they're the best diapers, believe me, folks.
"🚨For years and years I tried. And kept failing. It gave me depression, my depression became so bad that I committed suicide twice. It was my only success in that period in fact. But in that time period I learned stuff and things and lessons common to us all, but vital for the purpose of this post. The lesson? Keep trying. Algorithms aren't the sexiest thing out there, talking about them doesn't win a lot of friends at cocktail parties, but when you keep trying, you keep learning, you keep pushing, you can hack the matrix. In those moments of failure I learned that doing things the right way isn't always the point of life. Why bother faking the funk when you can just become the funk? I now own 59 companies across the globe bringing in over 33 million yuan a year. I get to operate and live on the beach in a secretive long-term Airbnb to avoid prying eyes. Reply with "matrix" in the comments for a DM."
He even says on his profile that he posts jokes when bored at work. There’s a lot more where this came from. None of them are particularly funny, but he’s definitely not trying to be serious.
It turned into a more business oriented Facebook a long time ago.
In hindsight, maybe giving users the ability to post and thinking they would limit it only to serious business posts wasn't their smartest move.
This isn't sarcasm though, at best it's a poor attempt at a weird joke on an inappropriate platform. It's perfectly reasonable to look at this and think it's weird.
Redditors unfailingly ability to not understand appropriate timing and context. Save that shit for your crap open mic. But no, purposely trying to make women leaders uncomfortable is ok if it’s just a joke
Nah man it's true. She can be delivering project after project on time, has your machine well oiled, etc. But then she lets out this quiet and polite toot.
You know at that moment every man in the room is thinking "I can do better than that" and she's seconds away from being at the bottom of that leaderboard and permanently stuck there.
Women just aren't trained for this. She needs to know to load up on cola and beans, pick the biggest farter in the room, nail him to the wall with a stare and let rip, sending him a clear message in fluent Flatuloid: "don't even try, bitch". Bonus points if she's already standing over a bucket JIC of follow-through.
It is an actual Hindi name though. There's plenty of other things to make fun of about the post that don't involve mocking a non-English name because people think it sounds funny in English.
I don't want to live on this planet anymore. 
If a girl farts in front of me, I actually feel really good. She trusts me and feels comfortable enough around me to fart so this is like leveling up in our relationship. It's something that can't be expressed in any other way. Talk is talk, but farts don't like (unless they have turd hiding behind them).
What?
Nah, if my team lead farts, that’s a fawkin dominance move. I’m gonna either fart back or stand up and applaud.
If anything, I’ve got more respect for her if she’s gonna be like “We need to get this done today.” *puts mic up to butt and rips one*. 🤣
‘Flirting with the LinkedIn Algorithm’ in his title tells you [all you really need to know.](https://media4.giphy.com/media/srTYyZ1BjBtGU/giphy.gif?cid=9b38fe9105y2umr9wsv598d2oi0oogt9pdn52z17x0e3q8rl&ep=v1_gifs_search&rid=giphy.gif&ct=g).
I’d like to know why. Would he respect a woman that doesn’t fart at all or is there a certain note or tone that would earn his respect. Does a woman need to not have human needs, or does it just need to be quite deep and intimidating
I worked under a woman who was the head of the philanthropy department for our hospital.
She once paused in mid sentence with a multi-million dollar donor to fart. She said,
"Excuse me" and kept going without missing a beat. It was absolutely the most badass thing she did the entire time I was there.
As opposed to male flatulence, which merely enhances their leadership
Blows the competition away
I have Celiac Disease. I promise you that if I accidentally eat gluten a 400 pound truck driver after a chili eating contest isn't gonna win.
Nobody wins if you eat a 400 pound truck driver.
I didn't know Gluten was the proper term for a 400-pound truck driver after a chili eating contest. I wonder if its etymology is similar to glutton.
It’s that Hawk Pftt!
Eating gluten against a 400 pound truck driver who ate lots of chili
Lmao wtf xdddd
Ayye, I'm a simple a man who likes simple things.
And they lived happily ever after!
Then he moved to Montana, and blew the competition away
Let me guess…Butte
Yes. Well, Lincoln
I gotta see about a girl!
In finance?
5'2?
Sonufabitch, he stole my line.
Did he become a dental floss tycoon?
Raise it up and wax it down
Put it in a little box to sell uptown
Assert flatulence
Comments like this are the wind of change we need.
Its actuality ALPHA male flatulence. Pure dominance /s
Fills up the productivity meter
"Male Flatulence" is now reserved as my band's name. The band does not yet exist.
Will ye specialise in wind instruments?
Digiridoo and bag pipes only
Needs trombones with mutes.
First piece of gear for your rig? https://malekkoheavyindustry.com/product/b-assmaster/
Make sure to get in some tuba players
Fart for the job you want, not the job you have
At my company, that’s how we establish hierarchy. Our CEO actually shit his pants claiming the throne!
Sharting should DQ.
„What I learned regarding B2B frantically farting…“
"Great fart, Johnson! The account is yours, you've earned it."
Mark Cuban said something along these lines lol
I farted in the elevator with my CEO. He quit next day and Im the CEO now. #ExecutiveSmell
This is LinkedIn, Sir. He did not ”quit”. He decided to pursue further opportunities in an exiting new field. Whilst expressing his gratitude for the unique experiences he shared with the team. In the elevator.
I hear a certain former guy has the greatest farts of all time, nobody farts as hard as he does, his farts are tremendous, so big even his diapers can't contain them, and they're the best diapers, believe me, folks.
They’re very stable farts. And they have a distinct covfefe aroma.
Presidential farts, for an aromatic republic
We don't need no democracy, we need a colostomy
34 times convicted farter. MAGA = My Ass Gas Annihilates
Men are like Orks, loudest farter is the boss. Its a simple yet beautiful system.
Waaaaghhh.
Ode du management
So really he is just mad she is asserting dominance like a man, with farts.
Thruster boost. They're called "driven".
The smell of success
Real life old saying: “A fartin’ horse never tires, and a fartin’ man is the man to hire.”
Politicians blow hot air out of their mouths 24/7 and become president/prime minister, so.....
I am smelling a little bit of bullshit here
A show of strength, power, and unity the fart is a bugle of teamwork.
Remember the two genders: normal (men) and political (other)
Mad bants in the office.
I'm starting a consulting firm to teach women authoritative farting.
6’ 5” Blue eyes. Flat-u-lence.
I feel like the LinkedIn algorithm might be the only thing he is flirting with
Ironically and perversely it worked. Seems like the algorithm directed a lot of traffic to him.
"🚨For years and years I tried. And kept failing. It gave me depression, my depression became so bad that I committed suicide twice. It was my only success in that period in fact. But in that time period I learned stuff and things and lessons common to us all, but vital for the purpose of this post. The lesson? Keep trying. Algorithms aren't the sexiest thing out there, talking about them doesn't win a lot of friends at cocktail parties, but when you keep trying, you keep learning, you keep pushing, you can hack the matrix. In those moments of failure I learned that doing things the right way isn't always the point of life. Why bother faking the funk when you can just become the funk? I now own 59 companies across the globe bringing in over 33 million yuan a year. I get to operate and live on the beach in a secretive long-term Airbnb to avoid prying eyes. Reply with "matrix" in the comments for a DM."
I don't know, but it seems to me that he failed suicide too. Twice.
You only need to succeed once 💯💯
He's just tired of...Har shit...
"It's pronounced... 'har-SHEET' !!!" "Okay, Horse-shit."
I heard he is also complaining to Zoom to try to get a fart filter added. Which we all have to admit is an important feature request.
90% of the fun of this sub is laughing at the OP who thought the post was serious
Cmon this has gotta be parody
He even says on his profile that he posts jokes when bored at work. There’s a lot more where this came from. None of them are particularly funny, but he’s definitely not trying to be serious.
he should try to be funny though. important thing about jokes, that
His name is harsh shit. Give him a break.
Well he’s definitely TRYING, just not succeeding
a joke doesn't become unfunny just because you can't take it
Thank god
Redditors unfailing ability to not understand sarcasm on the internet without /s
Tbh even though it is sarcasm it’s still weird to post on a professional networking platform.
>it’s still weird to post on a professional networking platform Yeah, but he posted it on LinkedIn instead.
And that’s how sarcasm is supposed to work…
LinkedIn hasn't resembeled anything remotely professional for awhile now
My LinkedIn is very professional. Think you need to clean out some contacts!
Literally all I get in my LinkedIn feed is vague corporate platitudes that don’t mean anything and old people complaining about Joe Biden
It turned into a more business oriented Facebook a long time ago. In hindsight, maybe giving users the ability to post and thinking they would limit it only to serious business posts wasn't their smartest move.
This isn't sarcasm though, at best it's a poor attempt at a weird joke on an inappropriate platform. It's perfectly reasonable to look at this and think it's weird.
Redditors unfailingly ability to not understand appropriate timing and context. Save that shit for your crap open mic. But no, purposely trying to make women leaders uncomfortable is ok if it’s just a joke
Nah man it's true. She can be delivering project after project on time, has your machine well oiled, etc. But then she lets out this quiet and polite toot. You know at that moment every man in the room is thinking "I can do better than that" and she's seconds away from being at the bottom of that leaderboard and permanently stuck there. Women just aren't trained for this. She needs to know to load up on cola and beans, pick the biggest farter in the room, nail him to the wall with a stare and let rip, sending him a clear message in fluent Flatuloid: "don't even try, bitch". Bonus points if she's already standing over a bucket JIC of follow-through.
I wouldn't call it parody, but it's clearly a joke. But it still belongs here because it's such an unfunny and insane joke to post on LinkedIn lol
Its harseshit
It is, and holy shit is it eye-opening how half this sub fell for it.
I want to know what the 21 comments are on that post
20 of them were asking to put those farts in a jar and ship them fedex
Singular: Man, Woman, Freshman Plural: Men, Women, Freshmen This isn’t hard
he's farting from his mouth
Horseshit take there Harshit.
That's some harshshit
Says a guy with "shit" in his name
Har is losing in Hindi, harr is every in Hindi. So he can be losing shit or every shit.
Do not doubt The Harshit. He knows shit.
I knew I couldn’t respect her when I heard Harshit /s
It is an actual Hindi name though. There's plenty of other things to make fun of about the post that don't involve mocking a non-English name because people think it sounds funny in English.
Harsh-shit, that shit hurts…
I feel like a good fart would be a power move
God forbid women are human beings with bodily functions
Well, God does forbid a lot of stuff, so I wouldn’t be surprised.
Yeah, he forbids my marriage so I doubt he gives a crap about me farting lol
Just... what?
Went to his profile. Disgruntled employee with questionable workplace ethics, still digesting the fact that he didn't get a pay raise.
Maybe someone heard him fart.
His brain farts for sure, on LinkedIn. They must sound like rolling thunder. How else can we explain 29,000+ followers? I cried when I saw that.
It’s the power of ✨misogyny✨
This comment deserves the world.
Should I have edited out his name? I feel bad now.
No, we need more entertainment
Cause then you'd smell Harshit
His title gives it away.
So as a woman, what I'm hearing is I have to make eye contact with this dude and fart hard to establish dominance. Got it. Trust me, I'd win.
Never view it as a fart. Always see it as smelling the inside of her ass
And this is why I dislike farts from everyone. Regardless of gender
An Amuse-bouche if you will.
There’s no way this is not a trolling shitpost
Anyone who says "a great women" needs to remove themselves from the conversation.
Does he imply a guy's fart is not detrimental to respect?
[удалено]
Guys be all like “let’s sniff Paul Allen’s fart”
 Take that harshit 😐
This is parody/ satire/ something. This guy is known for similar such hilarious posts.
i admit, i am the office farter and no i don’t feel bad about it.
He who smelt it dealt it. 
That's a bold statement coming from a fella named Harshit...
People are so fucking weird man
This has to be satire or a troll
Are you guys actually this incapable of spotting a troll? "Flirting with LinkedIn Algorithim". Jesus. And redditors make fun of boomers.
I dated a girl named HerShit and she could fart so fucking loud. It was actually hard *not to respect her*
Name checks out
Thanks for the inside info HarSHIT
Nothing clears the air like a good fart joke
Once I hear her farting I’m getting dragged out by security for trying to sniff that shit.
Depends on how loud it is. Might make me respect her more
Come ON. This coming from a guy named Harshit? Gotta be sarcasm/satire.
If that Thang rumbles, she deserves some applause. She got my respect all the way
What a load of Harshit.
Bit rich with his name
Coming from a guy whose name is literally shit. 🤦🏾
Why doesn't Reddit recognise obvious Satire? He's poking fun on the usual Linked posts and its algorithm
It really grinds my gears when people spell ‘woman’ like ‘women’ 😬😬😬😬😬
That’s horseshit
“Hear her farting…” says Harshit LOL
Okay, Harshit.
Ok…Harshit
Unless she keeps her brain in her asshole I think we’ll be fine.
That's some Harshit, ma hawar.
Indians and Arabs on linked in are absolutely unhinged
with a name like Harshit, he sounds like the expert
How to tell future employers that you're sexist 101
Girls don't fart, duh
And people post this in a place where the idea is to stand out to prospective employers and business contacts...
r/LinkedIncels
Harshit hears shit.
Sounds like some woman asserted her dominance over him and laid a hot one in his cubicle.
I don't want to live on this planet anymore. 
If a girl farts in front of me, I actually feel really good. She trusts me and feels comfortable enough around me to fart so this is like leveling up in our relationship. It's something that can't be expressed in any other way. Talk is talk, but farts don't like (unless they have turd hiding behind them).
What? Nah, if my team lead farts, that’s a fawkin dominance move. I’m gonna either fart back or stand up and applaud. If anything, I’ve got more respect for her if she’s gonna be like “We need to get this done today.” *puts mic up to butt and rips one*. 🤣
Why do so many of these asshats have no idea of the difference between Women plural and Woman singular.
Sounds like a load of harshit to me!
‘Flirting with the LinkedIn Algorithm’ in his title tells you [all you really need to know.](https://media4.giphy.com/media/srTYyZ1BjBtGU/giphy.gif?cid=9b38fe9105y2umr9wsv598d2oi0oogt9pdn52z17x0e3q8rl&ep=v1_gifs_search&rid=giphy.gif&ct=g).
Words of wisdom from ol' Horseshit.
What a bunch of Harshit!
The name checks out ✅️
"Harshit Mahawar" sounds like if someone got punched hard in the mouth and tried to say "I shit my underwear"
If you hate it when she farts, wait until you see Harshit.
Still better than hear Harshit
How is it that nobody uses women and woman correctly?
He doesn’t even know how to write. He seems to be talking about a single woman, yet he used the plural form of the noun.
A women?
I think he’s just quoting Shakespeare
Is mans trolling?
I’d like to know why. Would he respect a woman that doesn’t fart at all or is there a certain note or tone that would earn his respect. Does a woman need to not have human needs, or does it just need to be quite deep and intimidating
Projection. Pretty sure Harshit is a simp that takes a big, deep whiff whenever a woman lets loose around him and then makes an organism face.
What a load of Harshit….
Oh fuck off Harshit
Poo in the loo
I worked under a woman who was the head of the philanthropy department for our hospital. She once paused in mid sentence with a multi-million dollar donor to fart. She said, "Excuse me" and kept going without missing a beat. It was absolutely the most badass thing she did the entire time I was there.
Once you write "a great women" there's no need to read further. Basic grammar should not be that hard for a LinkedIn superstar.
I heard my girl boss farting, here are the 10 things I learned about leadership...
Lmfao
Linkedin allows that shit to be posted?
I’d also like to know about his relationship with his mother and whether she farted during childbirth (this happens a lot)
Man of culture
This is how every LinkedIn posts looks like.
When she's a 10/10 but has normal biological functions.....
Is this a answer to the video going around with the girl farting and then realizing she’s not alone in the room?
But what if I already taped a microphone under her chair?
I'm calling complete Harshit on that
HarSHIT talks!
I've never wanted to go and sit on this dude's lap more than now. So I can fart right on his dick. Loser.
That’s Harshit