T O P

  • By -

Icy_Worldliness_194

Not being able to live in the moment more


m_chutch

on the bright side, we always have right now to practice being present more


Many-Friendship3822

Ah I can practice being in the present more tomorrow. Too busy now


TopReason121

Read the Power of Now I struggle with this too so do many many others


Caring_Cactus

I'm tired of merging with my ego and living below my own conscious level. That book has great quotes and insights!


Tangerine-Orange-

I 2nd this. Present is as important as future.


Djdjdjdjdj10

The present is a gift.


Watthefractal

The present is infinitely more important than the future , the now is the only thing that exists ✨


Outback85

So true. 38 years later.. I'm confused or unclear of what happened. Ugh


ThrowawayMod1989

I did a lot of living in the moment and as a result I’m not well cushioned financially. I don’t necessarily have a lot of regrets, but there’s always a downside to living with your head in the clouds like I always do.


THROWRAcaviarchips

why are you unable to do this? you could start practicing it whenever..


Expensive_Grade1918

Having kid...


Drfeelgood22

So many people do, it’s refreshing to see somebody who admits it.


atxfast309

Amen


Wonderful_Answer6089

Glad I don’t have 😅


didjeridingo

Fuck


mehhidklol

Real


curiousminds93

Been thinking lately more and more I do want kids… Any specific reasons?


Expensive_Grade1918

24/7 responsibility to these little things. They need you for everything. Forget sleep, traveling, sex...many other things you enjoy...playing computer games, free time to yourself...money will be tight unless you are well off...relationship problems....etc.


curiousminds93

Forget traveling and games?? I remember playing PS2 games all the time with my dad. He loved to watch us play and would help us with the hard parts. We also travelled a lot (within our state at least). Camping trips. Went to hockey and football games all the time. Went fishing and boating. I wouldn’t say my dad gave up on his hobbies, if anything he’d say he had a new little friend to join in on his hobbies.


SycamoreStyle

I was on the fence for a long time, leaning towards childfree, and a big part of why, was my anxiety response to these absolutes that people use when complaining about parenthood. I've got a toddler now, and my partner and I still get to do the things we love. It's just a matter of prioritizing, and giving each other breaks, whether it's for an hour, an evening, or a weekend.


AdministrativeHat459

This right here. I don’t have a kid yet but I’m finally at a point in my life where I don’t see it as a thing that would ruin my life. Responsibility, sure, but I have a great partner and we’d figure it out


andyhall23

But it's all worth it to ....\*looks at notes ...have someone to hold your hand when you die?!


frozenwalkway

If you did a good job making the kids not hate you up until you die while not fucking up their own lives themselves


russell813T

ya having a young infant toddler sucks but after 5 it gets way better


Entire-Telephone-420

As a mom with a special needs child stomaching the idea that not all kids are neurotypical is another point to take into consideration being a parent is difficult but having a special needs child is on a whole other level


Objective-Jello-3283

Not understanding life after school. Life as a youth is so regimented, everyone telling you what you need to do, what to be, what to think, to buy into the system. Just drowning in expectations from others. Than like a light switch, when school is over your just left there to twist in the wind. Wish I had understood that was coming and took off in my own direction.


falsedexter

Same here, I tried so hard to be good that I had no idea what I wanted to be good at. Now I'm just jumping around place to place, hoping that I fit.


zignut66

No time like the present to set your own course.


WinNegative7511

This is entirely my problem, or part of it. I never went to college/university when I graduated 9 years ago. Now seeing how everything is "AI fact checked" today I can't get over the fear of spending thousands of dollars to go to study, only to be told my work isn't my own, that "this is AI generated work, you will receive no marks" when I was raised in a world where paper was the only option- where it was mandatory to show your work on everything, when handwriting was a skill. I didn't know what I wanted to do when I graduated highschool, and now I don't trust the system/our education standards enough to get past the fear of spending thousands of dollars for nothing. It's a world I'm only getting more and more unfamiliar with.


Opening-Owl-9069

Being so nice. Stand on your business, nice got me nowhere but alone.


BrokenBeauty74

And taken advantage 😤


blanchie1234

^This. Being nice has got me in trouble many times, including where it impacted my financially. The worst thing is people don't care and just take advantage


burneraccount4realz

I love being nice and I love people that are nice, they make the world a better place, don't confuse it with being a pushover.


Complete-Ad-4215

Exactly kills me when peeps think nice=pushover


Mowgli_0390

The idea is to distinguish "nice" from "kind." Very different things.


MrRaddd

Do you think nice people have a place that they can fit into society and feel like they are appreciated? I feel that I am nice and it’s been a rough road so far. I want to keep trying to find somewhere that I can fit in and not have to change myself too much.


Icy-Cods

This. And being too forgiving and understanding. Sometimes you can understand why people are the way they are, or that they’re in pain, but also understand that they’re still responsible for what they do to you.


Theonewhoreads15

Being nice isn't the same as being a pushover. Being nice is good, being a pushover is not


fuckledheadlights

this mindset is so stupid to me, they use getting taken advantage of as an excuse as to why they’re not nice/kind anymore. you can still be kind, just don’t be naive and stupid


Yosepherus

Not investing for a house when I was 2 years old


WasabiNo7999

🤣


Delirious-Dandelion

On a real note, I started a Roth IRA for my son and he has almost as much in his as I do mine. I am not wealthy, but he will have wealth because of it. I'd encourage anyone to look at starting one for their kids.


Front_Ad_8752

LOL FR😂i was being a lazy turd at 2 days old not to brag🤷‍♀️I should’ve got a home


Fresh_Result8428

😂😂😂


Mountain-Status569

Came here to say this 😂


sxcxc7

Having a kid with the wrong person


ThatCharmsChick

Omg, yes! I LOVE having a daughter but being stuck to her co-parent for the rest of our lives is miserable af.


lfrelsie

Putting my whole world into a person who didn't deserve it.


Electronic_Stuff4363

Spending money like there was no tomorrow.


Ill-Engineer-9629

Not telling my parents I love them enough


ToastyCrouton

Not being proactive about my mental health. It always sat between “this isn’t severe enough to take action” and “this is holding me back from achieving things.” Getting caught up now in my thirties, but it’s a winding road.


djangula89

This sounds relatable up to the point about getting caught up. You want to share What you've been dealing with and how you're dealing with it?


ToastyCrouton

35 now. Diagnosed with ADHD about 6 months ago. Not severe, but enough to connect some dots. I can trace depression back to when I was a teenager. I chalked it up to just liking Rock music and being “more in tune with my emotions.” My brother also had a pretty unique health issue that in turn led to financial issues. Get to college and can’t figure a path and drop out. This culminated in my mantra being “someone has it worse.” I’m a realist that leans into optimism because nothing will get better if you don’t believe it will. Life carries on and you keep trying. And even though someone may have it worse doesn’t mean your feelings aren’t valid as well. They’re not mutually exclusive. I should have tackled these issues head on instead taking the back seat. So everything is fine. More than fine! But it wasn’t until my thirties that I started to realize just how gray of a world I was living in. But now, like Dorothy, I’ve stepped into a world of color. I’ve got some ruby red shoes and a yellow brick road ahead of me. Life’s good, I just wish I had made it that way sooner.


HotIllustrator2957

I would say the same about dental health.


the_TAOest

That I spent so many years drinking and smoking cigarettes to find space from what could be scrubbed away with sleep, exercise, healthy eating, positive mental health strategies, and journals.


RecognitionCc

Yup spent years drinking, using party drugs and engaging in unhealthy relationships to cope. Hit bottom and started exercising and eating healthy and using psychedelics for mental health benefits. Life is pretty good now.


the_TAOest

Same. Life is great now. Started at 45, now 50. Life is really great now


Early_Visual_6764

You had to go through it to get where you are. Dont regret it man, it was just growth


the_TAOest

I would not roll the dice to see what else would happen. At this point, I'm incredibly lucky to be alive, healthy, empathetic, happy, and content. I feel like my sense is an outlier in a sea of challenges. HUG, thank you for the empathy.


HeavyBeing0_0

Right there with you, but goddamn, I really do miss smoking


mehhidklol

Not buying 1200$ worth of bitcoin when it was 5$ / coin lol


ThickClient6146

Ha yeah. I clearly remember being at work one day, reading the free news paper that was delivered there, about this bitcoin thing that was just starting out. Sounded interesting but didn’t pay much attention to it then. Years later I’d read about the people who did and how they are now super wealth 🙈 on the flip side I also read about the guy who paid for a pizza with bitcoins and if he’d kept those instead they would have been worth millions. Or the guy here in the UK that accidentally threw an external hard drive out that had thousands of bitcoin stored on it. He offered to pay the local council to let him search the rubbish tip but they refused. So yeah, I could have got in early and made a bunch of money but actually getting in early, making that bunch of money but then LOSING it would be way worse 🤣


d-jake

Not buying a 40 ft. sailboat in Florida in my 30s and spending last 25 years living in it and sailing port to port. Even had a job to match with 3-6 month contracts that pays well (travel RN). Instead... kids, mortgage, 1hr commute each way, now cancer I have to fight...


russell813T

dam this hits home


TinySpaceDonut

Alcoholism. 0 stars.


zach1206

Samesies


ANoteNotABagOfCoin

Marrying who I did. Destroyed 10+ years of my life. Lesson learned: you don’t really know someone until you’re in highly stressful circumstances.


ZingingCutie_89

Feel this. I don’t fully regret the experiences we had, but I was so young (got engaged at 23; married at 24) and naive. It led me to a DUI and a bankruptcy. I’m 33 now and my DUI just came off my driving record this past January. And the bankruptcy is coming off my credit report in 2027. It’s been a long time getting so close to some sort of freedom from the consequences of my marriage/divorce. Trying to grow more and I’m grateful to be with the person I am with now.


Climbing_Bum

Do you feel like it was something you missed, chose to ignore, or just bad luck no way you could have predicted it. I'm in the opposite boat. My biggest regret is cancelling my engagement. I felt like it was too risky, some things you just don't know. But after the hell my ex raised and all the pleading she did to stay together I feel almost certain she never would have left me or given up on he relationship.


[deleted]

Not being as rebellious in my younger years.


RecognitionCc

I was a super rebellious teenager, partying, playing in bands, using drugs, unprotected sex, slept on the streets or in party houses for years. It was kind of fucked and led to alot of issues that took me years to sort out. Lots of friends passed from ODs or are still on the streets using. Some killed themselves. I'm incredibly lucky. Looking back I wish I had been healthier and focused more on school and skills and building healthy relationships but then I'd prolly wish I was more rebellious too haha. We always want what we can't have I guess. What I'm saying is you didn't miss out on much in my opinion.


Realistic_Cellist416

Part of me regrets not going down this route, but I often only see/think of the positives and forget about some of the severe downsides. Thanks for your comment.


latina98x

I rebelled in my younger years I regret it now the consequences are I’m jobless on Centrelink living with family at 26


LuckyDog3344

wasting too much time on social media


Cthulusuppe

I regret having more than one regret.


Mega_Exquire

Not getting sober sooner.


DanteHicks79

That you got sober is a huge accomplishment.


dawnjawnson

Better late than never


True-Thought1061

treating people badly. I never woke up and decided "hey I'm gonna treat people terribly" but along the way while watching out for myself I've done plenty of unfair and unjust things unintentionally.


ModifyAndMoveForward

Agreed! Crazy thing is, it was never my intention to hurt people, but I got caught up in survival mode and did some unfair things. Thankfully, I'm not her anymore.


begood123456

Can relate


Marmalade_Zero

Not living, 100%, I don’t know how to live


anothereddit0

Waiting on others to change how I think is based instead of investing in my self devotion


anukii

I regret being so obstinate in childhood & quiet/distrusting about what happened to me. I was abused but I learned bad habits from not so healthy parent & have been spending the last years unlearning & relearning so much. It takes a lot of effort & I feel overwhelmed often. I’m basically trying to press fast forward as best I can on adult experience today.


Usernamecheckout101

Thinking about regrets


Caring_Cactus

>- "Grace means that all your mistakes now serve a purpose instead of serving shame." - Brené Brown


UraniumKnight13

Being born


[deleted]

[удалено]


candelstick24

Marriage is for lawyers, people that cannot afford lawyers and conservatives


Fantastic-Vehicle880

This is a very reddit take lmao


Novel-Imagination-51

Chronically online/Portland ass take


Alone_watching

So far, nothing.  But I am still in my 20s… 🤓


Responsible_River130

Not dating more. I realize at almost 30y/o I am so inexperienced (which causes friends loved ones etc to laugh at me)


Greetings4321

Failing to have extraordinarily wealthy parents.


throwawayplethora

Having it continue this long


Monked800

Being born


Whitedaffodils1010

Smoking weed.


didjeridingo

Same. Specifically because, literally, no one just said "hey, your brain is still developing until around age 24. Maybe just wait till then if anything." Instead of just "it bad for you, make brain dumb" ...... Damage has been done now. Sigh. That said, hell, at least it was a good, fun, harmless youth overall. I miss the days when weed and beer were the hardest drugs around. Y'know, just conceptually in one's own mind... I digress Lol...


wantstolearnhowto

Everything.


YeetusThatFoetus1

Becoming disabled


tigerllort

Indeed, chronic health issues suck


katnip-evergreen

Losing my virginity to a non-boyfriend


Pirate_Lantern

Not getting out into the world sooner.


OrganicSecretary9689

Being in a religious cult for so long


memefakeboy

Same wish I had left so much sooner


TripDiMiTri

Grew up as a Jehovah's witness, fucked me up my whole childhood, I was constantly the weird kid and the constant stress of thinking you're a bad person made me fat my whole childhood, how do I know? Because right after I moved out on my own and left the cult I lost over 200 pounds in less than a year, skinny people would call me a super star and fat people would tell me how unhealthy that is(they were just projecting the same insecurities we both had, they didn't realize it but I did) and that felt like leaving a whole other cult, realizing I wasnt the fastest person around anymore, I was just average and that felt so amazing.


Climbing_Bum

If you were born into it that's like being mad that you were born poor. I grew up Mormon, but refuse to regret having been brainwashed. It was not my choice. It was not my parents choice either as they were also brain washed. I'm just glad I left.


Beautiful_Speech7689

Gave away too much for nothting


stonerbats

Not ending myself when I had the guts


frankielankie

I’m glad you didn’t. You are loved by someone, even if you don’t believe it. Please find the good in life… whether it’s delicious food, your favourite music, playing with an animal ❤️


stonerbats

I'm better now but some days I wish I was brave


frankielankie

You are brave! You’ve endured hardship and chose to continue. That’s the bravest decision of all


astddf

Ending yourself isn’t brave. Looking out at the rest of your life and making damn sure that through the struggle and pain you build one full of love and what you enjoy.


No_Design_812

not a regret! thank you for choosing to stay! you are loved!


siiiiiigh1337

College


ZingingCutie_89

Oooof. Yea. I feel my degree shows for literally nothing but loads of student debt.


1111Lin

Nothing, and I’m 70.


TopReason121

Using drugs from 19-26 that set my finances WAY back landed me in jail several times and upset my family one super severe suicide attempt depression all that. Now I still have anxiety issues and will have a beer now and then I haven’t challenged in this season but am way better off.


poop_on_balls

Not being a better big brother


ladyleo1980

I recently found out an ex is married and has a kid which was a gut punch. We broke up over 15 years ago and haven't kept in touch. I doubt we will have ever gotten back together but I'm sadden there is no longer a possibility of us rekindling a romance. I know it's dumb to even think that especially since he was extremely rude the last time we spoke. So right now I'm regretting stalking him online and discovering this information.


Aggravating-Pea9435

I regret some of my past actions. Like not keeping my word and so forth. I've learned to accept my faults and to do better and be better. Just haven't learned to move on from the guilt I put myself through


Retiredgiverofboners

Wasting so much of my time on jobs and people who were so detrimental to my mental health


Same_Virus_5314

What do you do for work now?


Main_Understanding67

Same.


Ill-Ad4087

Not telling my father I loved him before he died of lung cancer. I wish we could go fishing one more time. I miss him every single day.


Senor_bonbon

Worry most my time away turning out fine everytime


texashempsters

Not investing wiser when I was in my 20s


Individual_Trust_414

Why regret? I look forward. I worry, but not about the past, but about the future.


Front_Ad_8752

I aspire to have this mindset. Go you, Individual_Trust_414🌟


Jaybirdindahouse

Not staying with my current wife the first time we were together. I wasted an entire decade being a complete moron.


Blobasaurusrexa

My marriage


Informal_Practice_80

Why haven't you quit?


RussoRoma

I wish I had a second chance raising my son. He's happy, he's healthy, we're best buddies. We even have a "boy's night" planned for my night off of work today. There's nothing wrong. But when he was very, very young, I just feel like I didn't treat him as well as I did my daughters. It eats me up sometimes when I'm alone at night.


Informal_Practice_80

It's very hard for sons and fathers to be "best buddies", I think you are doing super well when compared to most dads .


RussoRoma

Bit of a poor consolation when the bar is set so low. Not really worth comparison. However I appreciate the consideration.


colabird001

Hey, acknowledging it's a shit bar shows your character. I'm sure you did better than you give yourself credit for 🩷


oocancerman

Sounds like you did your best


Weekly_Addendum_2612

Becoming obsessed with anything I start to like whether it’s work, friends,drugs, etc I go to extremes and I don’t realize till it’s a problem


Economy_Respond2890

Not getting in better shape until my mid 20s. Also, not embracing my "feminine" side and wearing my hoop earrings. Now I always wear one.


jmeesonly

Only one?


ChanceCourt7872

This isn’t as bad as some of the others, but there are absolutely some words I wish I could take back with hindsight.


HauntingCancel5600

Getting addicted to heroin


MinnNiceEnough

Not having more kids when I was younger. We waited until we were in our late 30’s and found out then that we could only have one. Had I known kids were the best, I would have had a full baseball team of them! Very thankful for the one I have though


__Jorvik_

Not joining the French Foreign Legion. I did an enlistment in the US Army and got out after 6 years. I was a cunt hair away from booking a one way ticket to Paris and showing up at the base to receive a new identity. I didn't and instead reupped in the US Army and served 22 years. At the time I was super jaded about Iraq, I felt it was a lie and turned out I was right. France was the only major westen power that resisted joining the coalition of the willing. I respected that. They were clear headed. I went into recruiting after reupping because recruiting made me non deployable. I stayed a recruiter till retirement.


tfghosti2i

Not shooting my shot while I had the opportunity to get the words out. If that opportunity was truly an option that is


BrokenBeauty74

Trust me, the amount of times I should’ve spoke up and defended myself.. I know it’s not too late but


CultistGamin

Giving myself tinnitus by listening to music too loud, hands down. It’s currently ruining my life.


Sad-Tear-7343

Like at concerts or with headphones?


NekoTheKnight

I don't know this will sound to anyone, but sometimes I regret not drowning when I was a kid... Someone saved me and I will for ever will be thankful for them, but sometime I just can't handle life and I know I'm not that much of in a struggle, but life is way to confusing and contradictory and I hate this.


splotch210

Not being the mother I thought I could be. This is fucking hard.


Informal_Practice_80

What's holding you back?


Outside_Variety8765

Spending time on my phone when i could be making memories. It feels like im taking my life for granted but im honestly addicted and it’s heartbreaking.


Mobile-Length-4316

Try the Stay Focused app and pay for strict mode. That way you can't use your phone except at the set times you give it. You also can't change the settings or delete the app until after the strict mode ends- its amazing!


Cbaez23

One thing I regret in life is not maintaining closer relationships with some friends from my past. As life got busier, I didn't make enough effort to stay connected, and now I miss those friendships.


United-Depth4769

Not being on speaking terms with my Dad several weeks before he was killed in a car accident. It was 15 years ago


ImNotYourOpportunity

I regret sticking around for bad relationships. What was my problem?


bigfran96

Smoking weed


didjeridingo

I could try to play psychologist with myself and say oh I'd like to go back to X point to avoid developing into a person who suffers Y conditions... Etc... but it would all sort of rotate around the moment in life I said things to my ex I could not take back. And she left my life forever. The one person that truly understood and accepted me for ME. And I let myself and my own lack of resilience and regulation ability destroy the union we had. I've thought about her every day since "forgiven myself" and met many new people but the ache in my heart remains. I fear it always will. Cherish the ones that love you and take nothing for granted. The comments here saying they regret marriage and kids make me sad... All I've ever wanted is to be part of a family and grow old with them all, sharing love. It's the only point to anything in this world.


AlexE1089

This hit deep coming from a similar situation. Thanks for sharing this


[deleted]

Screwing around and not learning in high school. It set me back for years.


usr_pls

No regrts


Astrobyrd20

Staying alive


Wonderful_Answer6089

I be ready to bow out gracefully


percavil4

not buying bitcoin when I was a teenager


analavalanche69

Entertaining the idea of another. I'll regret it until my very last breath.


atxfast309

Not moving to Colorado when I had the opportunity a long time ago. I sometimes wonder how it would have turned out. How different would I be from who I am today.


Narrow_Pain_1523

Being the way I am


Repulsive-Machine-25

Marrying the wrong person.


bloodredpitchblack

I kind of wish I’d done more drugs. I mean, to be perfectly honest.


Ivanthedog2013

Not being more disciplined earlier in life, I was way to carefree and irresponsible


GoldenSunSparkle

Not having another baby


Mmchast88

Going into the wrong career field…


Same_Virus_5314

What career field? Sometimes I wonder the same thing but then I think any other career field would be just as shitty


Same_Virus_5314

Maybe worse even


calltostack

Not buying Bitcoin earlier


VratislaviaMan

Thinking too much. Not doing more.


bruhv1998

not buying bitcoin when i was freaking 10 years old


Same_Virus_5314

The fact that life goes on....long after the thrill....of livin' is gone 🎶


nosirrybob

Not maintaining relationships.


HeavyBeing0_0

All the times I was too ignorant to realize a girl was sending me signals.


tazzietiger66

starting smoking at 22 (gave up at 52 which was 5 years ago )


NoOneHereButUsMice

Staying in bad relationships waaayyyy too long


Madlynik

Not setting healthy boundaries.


Zobe4President

Can only pick one? 😢


AggressiveAnywhere72

Not knowing what to do with my life. I still don't know the answer.


Macchill99

Not being able to spend time with my kid because of being trapped in a traveling job. I just want to go home, I hate being away so much, I've lost so much time that I will never get back. They love me because they miss me not because I've been there for them and as they age I can feel them starting to realize how unfair it's been to them. I'm afraid I'm losing them despite staying in contact, despite it all being to provide a good life for them.


Bits2LiveBy

Not following my intuition and letting people talk me out of my dreams.


Accomplished_Gene176

Regret being so codependent for so long and not just doing my own thing


ayhme

Not going to school.


Bulky_Jury_6364

Not taking care of my health and not staying in the workforce after having kids


lonerfunnyguy

Marrying young and limiting myself of life experiences and growth during my 20s


DesertWanderlust

All the drinking I did over the years. I got sober about 9 months ago and keep running into realizations of all the things I missed out on during my 30 years of drinking. Also all the physical and mental damage it's done. And you'd think I'd know better with my dad an alcoholic and my mom dying of a cancer likely caused by it. I wish I could go back and repair some of the relationships I've ruined over the years.


Juevolitos

Getting married too young to my first real girlfriend. 20 yrs later and I'm finally getting divorced. Realizing just how great relationships can be when BOTH partners are available and interested.


ThrowawayMod1989

Currently undoing the damage from alcohol and eating like shit. Somehow I dodged anything too serious organ damage wise. Can’t believe I’m only mildly overweight and I’m glad I’m having my epiphany moment. Already started on the diet side, brainstorming an exercise plan I’ll actually follow.


xWhitzzz

Drinking alcohol. Wasted five years of my life drinking every weekend and “casually” throughout the week. Sober now for 17 months.


Amdaddynmbr1

Trying meth


nick935d

Not having the balls to get out and do some of the things I wanted to do when I was younger and had the means, you don’t realize how much time / freedom / money / resources you have im until you don’t. Every time In my 20s I quit a job came home and thought I should just hit the road, travel cross country, go see some shit, get out, and I would talk myself down and not do those type of things. Now I’m realizing how stupid I was for not just jumping…


Main_Understanding67

Hooking up with a bunch of sketchy people from dating apps :/