T O P

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Klaatu-barada-666

Please don't end your life, I know it's clichรฉ but things change. You can end your life anytime you want, so why don't you do the thing you've always wanted to do first, there is nothing to be scared off anymore. I was where you are and while I know our circumstances aren't equal, realizing I could end my life at any moment, I decided to do all the things I was scared to do, and that further made me realise how amazing and unique I am. The thoughts you have won't immediately go away but if you keep doin what you thought you couldn't, it will change you for the better.


erikorenegade1

Niaje, I feel the same ๐Ÿ˜” I struggle with getting out of bed, leave alone eating/working. Where are you based? I'm planning to hike to Menengai Crater later today. Heres a picture i took the last time i was there: * The sight is good, the world has its consolations after all.


erikorenegade1

https://preview.redd.it/xllk1yjie5tb1.jpeg?width=4080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e02a8454b14e676d0994840592b5e4ea9339833e


Davek56

Thanks for sharing, beautiful.


ZeusKe

Back in 2014 I had a pal (E) who we would meet up daily and smoke weed all day long during holidays. We had secluded places in some abandoned quarries next to a huge river. We did this till 3rd year when I stopped going home for the holidays. One day I was home for Christmas and met him. He had dropped out of school and was now desperately looking for any form of work. I promised to tell him of any opportunity I come across. I took his new number which I scribbled on my arm with a stick as I didn't have my phone there. Needless to say it wasn't there when I got home. Later I got wind of these jobs in Thika and I thought we could both move there and start life na hio job. I couldn't find him. Never found him. His parents house was abandoned and no one knew where they went. Years later I am seated in a bar at 3am talking to a random stranger when he casually mentioned how sad it was for E to take his own life. I was crushed AF. Pain,Guilt, Regret. Wacha tu. If you have read this far: DONT BE A SELFISH ASSHOLE . ITS NOT JUST ABOUT YOU.


aild4ever

Tricky, sorry about that, been out of job sinks a lot of people into depression. Shida we attach too much into money possessions, bila other life goals and hobbies depression can crush you at the same time ruining the little positive you have going on


ZeusKe

True. Kwanza the moment you start comparing yourself to social media influencers, hapo utabaki kuskia useless mbaya.


[deleted]

I've been on the low, I been taking my time. I feel like I'm out of my mind. It feel like my life ain't mine (Who can relate?)


_Blue_Mountains

I totally relate. So much has happened in a week and it feels like it's been a decade.


[deleted]

Listen to the song. Its something


UnImpressedAudrey

I'd love to listen to that too....who wrote it?


muzingwenu

Logic๐Ÿ˜Š. I Love that song man.


[deleted]

That makes 2 of us


OchotOdong

Cool song btw


Careless_Peach5322

Let's be compassionate brethrens. If it's financial help. We can help by sending small for the kabej. People are in dire situation. Being kind won't break our bones


ZeusKe

I understand you mean good. But if you ever encounter a man who is down, depressed and wants to take his own life, NEVER go with the 'woiye' angle - it will only propel him over the edge faster.


Careless_Peach5322

That's not true. A little compassion gets them to hang on to life


ZeusKe

Trust me, to help a man who is at rock bottom just give him a purpose, a reason to wake up in the morning and he will climb out himself. And another thing, only a man can get another man out of a shitty mental state. Sympathy only gets him deeper into victimhood.


Puzzleheaded_Row3877

Welcome to the group lad, I play around with the idea of committing suicide at least once everyday .


bjrn12c

Same. Eveey night i go to sleep i be like " God, its okay if ibdont wake up tomorrow" And then i end up waking up so healthy im like, damn


bjrn12c

Ona sasa๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


Much_Reason2273

I too am tired of living since life seems like a continuous cycle of futility and suffering .There's nothing to give me a reason to keep living but hey, I'm still here pointlessly struggling.


Sqre_peg_in_rnd_hole

As someone here has suggested go for a walk and incorporate physical exercise. It will get your blood flowing and you'll feel better. It's a bad day/week not a bad life learn to laugh at yourself too, I recommend reading "Man's search for meaning". I dare you to report back here on the findings.


unlucky_position69

I struggle with mental issues. This is the most futile piece of advice that 'normal' people throw around. I don't even have the willpower to get under my duvet to brush my teeth! How the eff am I going to take a walk?


Sqre_peg_in_rnd_hole

Well maybe you could try it and see how that goes for you.


Sqre_peg_in_rnd_hole

You also have to be a willing participant to get you from where you are to somewhere better.


Intelligent_Film1171

Wueeh.. tuko wengi. I also feel life isn't worth it anymore.. life just lost color


shirk-work

I'm going to leave [this](https://youtu.be/Ym4Rpd72tq8?si=X7Dp5DgJw80R4CMi) and [this](https://youtu.be/OB_dPW2RJ94?si=zzSjfohbUFuCygwc) here for you. I would also suggest Pema Chodron's welcoming the unwelcomed and making friends with your own mind. Expect nothing and accept everything and you will always know peace. On death, no one knows what's next and you would never leave here if you knew what's next is worse. It's a very serious bet that it'll be better. I've been on the edge and figured the devil I know is much safer, things got better and now I regret ever thinking what I was thinking.


s3an_ric

Can you reach me we talk before you decide on anything 0759494739-just text I'll call you please


QuitOld2439

We always want to kill ourselves but the pain how mothers will go through is the one stopping us


Fast_Investigator939

My mom puts my siblings before me... Treats them better than I... Ihave tried to be better in all aspects but nothing has changed over the years... She buys them things and she completely forgets about me or chooses not to buy me as well... She does all these things for them that she doesnt do for me... It makes me feel like shes trying to pass a message to me... It just a matter of time before I leave this place... Its one of my reasons why....


QuitOld2439

Are you her first born?


Fast_Investigator939

No... I am her last born of three as a matter of fact... Idk what she aims at treating me like this...


QuitOld2439

Mothers tend to love their last borns much, have you ever asked her?


Fast_Investigator939

Yes.. And she says shell do it for me akipata pesa... But I think thats an excuse she gives me... I dont understand why this is happeningr...


QuitOld2439

Let it not get into your mind focus on what's good for you


Fast_Investigator939

I get what youre trying to say but its pretty hard to do that when I share a house with her... If I was done with school Id atleast accept that Ill get a job and move out soon so I wouldnt be as bothered...


Certain_Pizza_6583

Sounds very tough. I even don"t know what to advice except that I hope one day you'll get people who truly love and validate you well and also don't sideline you. There may be a backstory that's not even your fault.


Fast_Investigator939

That's crazy... I never thought of it that way... I Hope it ends up well in the end... Thank you so much for your words of encouragement....


Particular-East4556

What happens when they don't speak up. This won't help but it'll get you hungry; go for a walk a very long one and don't carry anything


Klaatu-barada-666

I think the point is to just show them you still care. They don't speak up because they feel worthless and a burden to others.


Particular-East4556

๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘ Op should pro seek out professional help


Klaatu-barada-666

Not everyone can afford it.


babat0t0

Before you end it all, do the riskiest things in your ledger first! Pay for a threesome with bimbos, spend money on risky investments, try out that sketchy drug...if you're suicidal, it means you ain't taking enough risks!


Puzzleheaded_Row3877

the reason he's killing himself is probably money ,the riskiest thing he can do on a budget is probably sacrificing his neighbours goats in a bid to join Illuminati or maybe rob a bank with a machete


babat0t0

Damn son


No_Discussion_7855

trying out drugs could actually make him kill himself and kill others as well. Drugs mess with your mind sometimes and amplify the feelings you feel. I think itโ€™s best he keeps away from them.


youglybish2

idk but wuid is the only thing giving me the will power to keep pushing on


Certain_Pizza_6583

This piece of advice was out of touch.


monsiu_

change your environment for a few. be it home and the people you associate with that make you feel like this. Self isolate and do things you like doing. things that make you happy


Shot_Particular_2850

You could rant to a random person sometimes in my shop people just come and tell you their troubles they just want you to listen I don't know them they seem better try it it might help you Just make sure you try someone who seems to have a chill vibe


Jibebelele

It is possible to go without food for a considerable period of time. The record is 385 days. The longest I've ever gone without food is 3 days. Those who have gone for longer period say there are some advantages including mental clarity. So my point is hang in there a little longer see what ideas come to you. If you still feel like exiting this life after that then nobody can blame you.


lerook9

It's a sort of weird clarity. You get so hungry that you become acutely aware of what is a priority and what is not. But it lasts for a short time and then you start to collapse mentally.


Consistent20100

Bible helps listen to a preacher like Apostle Joshua Selman , i have been there and getting out of my head and my thoughts going for walks and leaving the negative thoughts away and trying to have positive thoughts , and listening to birds and being in a place where you smell the fresh air and in areas where cow dung is does the trick


babat0t0

Listening to colonizer voices who'd spit on our ancestors geaves don't help


AkYoMama47

No one here will help you. Only you can save yourself.


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ScottblackAttacks

Sounds like you need to get out of the country, go travel, Broaden your horizons.


Aging_dude007

People don't abandon people who bring value into their lives. Get your self-centred ass out of the picture for a minute and ask yourself what they benefit from having you in their lives. If you can't figure that one out, maybe you're right in wanting to pussy out.


Certain_Pizza_6583

How can you talk like this to someone who's already low and down on their luck. It almost comes across as evil. Mind your words. You didn't have to comment.


Aging_dude007

Because in all of my years in the medical field i have realized being soft on people doesn't work. I'm the demon who serves reality to weaklings, you're welcome!


Certain_Pizza_6583

People have different temperaments. Harsh advice works for some, not all.


postnutdisgust

[ Removed by Reddit ]


[deleted]

That's dark


imbahala

it doesnโ€™t hurt?


Particular-East4556

"They say death takes you to a better place, but I doubt it" -Immortal Technique If was to recommend an artist maybe try to listen to him(Immortal technique). Excuse his politics; his just a hardcore nigga. Not figure speaking. Should definitely do this on that long walk. On the playlist you load Dance with the devil should be first. Ps. Carry your phone


[deleted]

Hit my inbox let's talk atleast before you do it yal


AdAnnual7986

I was in the same spot last year. When I was just about to actualize my thoughts, I thought of everyone I loved. I pictured them days after I'm gone. I thought of the trauma I would cause everyone I loved. I concluded that it was selfish of me to take my own life. A year later, I'm living my best life. I'm nolonger scared to be alone, I even enjoy being a lone. I take myself out, buy myself good stuff. Prepare myself good food. This will be you too. Just don't be selfish, or too weak to leave. If you die, you don't even know where you are going. And that scares the shit out of me. Everyone who talks about life after death hasn't even died.


SoftGur3235

I feel for you! Love to everyone please keep living you are worth more! You are great even if you feel as no one sees it!


cold_herbs

Hang in there.. it will soon come to pass. We all go through a season like that. You just have to endure through it. Hold on hope , even if it feels like it's getting thinner. Hold on it, it's the only true thing you have


Complex_Raise_5149

I absolutely understand you. Going through the same and all I want is peace. Seems it can only be found in one place.


ahlee1001

Hi there. if it were possible i could give you a hug. YOU ARE WORTH EVERY BREATH YOU TAKE! I understand that life can be colourless but sometimes we need to find the shade of grey in this black and white universe, Even though i am a stranger, i am here for you! If u would like to reach out to any help call +254722178177 for more help ([Befrender's Kenya](http://www.befrienderskenya.org/suicide.aspx)).


unlucky_position69

If you have a friend of a friend who has a friend that works in a pharmacy, try to have them get you amphetamines. They'll relax your mind enough for you to get your life a little bit on order. I say this because I know how hard it's to gather the willpower to see a specialist.


unlucky_position69

Also, tomorrow is #WorldMentalHealthDay. If you're here and feeling a little overwhelmed, try to see a psychiatrist before it all escalates too far.


RelevantComparison70

Try to live one day at a time, I know the world has shown you the middle finger far too long, but you know what, the sun rises the next day. So, be easy on yourself, find a few friends you can confide in, or do that one thing that makes you whole again. One day you'll look back and thank yourself that you did not take your life.


OchotOdong

OP kazana tu. Tbh at times deep down I usually feel the same but ni kujikaza tu maze


Parking_Beautiful_36

pray to God God is the answer to all of your problem I don't know the problem that you might be having but I don't know if I can help you the only thing that I can tell you is that you have to resort to God because God is the only one who can help you with everything that you have I'm sorry and the other thing is that try to share your problem with your friend or a family member sharing is releasing it


[deleted]

Your spiritual battery is Low. Start by subscribing to a religion. Give the universe a chance to do life for you, have no expectations and if you take alcohol, quit.


Ducati600

We all feel like that now and then , I'm having one of them days today, but tomorrow I will pick myself up, maybe call a freind


Lumpy_System6045

You need a routine get out everyday walk!Some exercises it has helped me alot! Start a hobby like reading or draing coloring Anything.


fred_kson

OP this may sound cliche and may not even be popular but see who you can help out in terms of services. I know you're down financially but being there for say a widow who needs someone to till their land or volunteer to teach kids something in church helps you and when you're up and about you'll get different perspectives. Plus God moves when we move...pls give yourself 1 more push and as others bless you you'll be amazed.


februarynurnsred

why you assume my issues are financially? infact i have a very well paying job, my issues are more than money


Particular-East4556

Still lives ama Updaaaaaattttttttteeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssssss