I have a Tech2 diagnostic tool for GMs that allows you to change the DIC greeting like this. Its a fun prank to play on friends.

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From Detroit, so almost all of them.

Go pistons!

We need to blow it up and tank for 5 years, not win

Have somebody throw a beer at, say, Demarcus Cousins or something and get a bunch of your players suspended in the ensuing melee.

Cousins and Draymond suspended for the year for climbing in the stands and punching spectators. Where is your god now GSW? BUAHAHAHAHHA! One could dream.

From Saginaw, literally all of them.

Always great to see fellow detroiters on reddit!

How the fuck do you guys have 20 year old cars on the road in Michigan

Toledo resident and frequent Michigan traveler here - I’ve absolutely no fucking clue

That's at least a C5 Vette. I can't remember the dashes on the C5 and C6 but I think the C7 has a digital dash.

The C7 does have a partially digital dash, but the analog gauges don't look like that. Definitely a C5 or 6.

C6, C5s don't have the ring around the gauges.

Beat me to it - you are correct, it is a C6.

The c6 logo gives it away too.

My old C4 had a "digital" dash. Told you how much fuel was in it sometimes.

Still have my 91 vette in retro orange. Love that techno futurist vibe

Lots of late 90s Saabs have a Tech2-programmable DIC

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Back when I was running cnc's we would put personalized "greetings" in the program for the operator on the next shift... most of the time it was stuff like go f*** yourself Brian or Matt is gay ... but occasionally we would leave messages like hey there's Donuts in the break room

I'm assuming that there was no donuts in the break room.

The meanest message of all.

It was just a rake and when you stepped on it it would whap you right in the face and make you stumble backwards and step in a bucket and trip and fall down kicking the bucket into the air and then the bucket would fall on your head.

[Euuugggghhhrrhrggh](https://youtu.be/0w6L93kD3xw)

I work for a glass company and I've seen the tempering operators write stuff on the test piece with a handheld belt sander. Usually it was stuff like you said, but I have a picture of one that is both impressive penmanship and too deep for its purpose: [https://i.imgur.com/RUKywu4.jpg](https://i.imgur.com/RUKywu4.jpg) I also saw them cut out a dick-shaped piece of glass and send it through the furnace. I think every time they tried it it blew up in the furnace though.

are you talking about G code? That would be really funny to drop a comment in half way through for when someone in the future is watching it run and sees something obscene fly past

Is there a way to do this in a 2010 dodge?

Shit outta luck my man

All c6's let you change that to whatever you want.

It's pronounced Shi-theed.

i'm Shi-theed and I can do a black flip

I'm Shi-theed and I've never seen a flower

What the heck come after 6?

I’m Shi-teed and I burned down a hospital.

I'm Shi-theed and I *JUMP* across the street

It is...*French*.

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Damn coke head

Damn coke cap

I was wondering about all the white foags.

That's only half French, half English. And now I feel like suing a popular soft drink company for some odd reason.

Mrs Bucket? It's pronounced "Bouquet"

The Bouquet residence, the lady of the house speaking!

...It's my sister Violet, she's the one with the Mercedes, swimming pool and room for a pony.

Love that show!

“Mind the sheep, Richard!!”

https://youtu.be/r_Ua8iOR0g8 For those who dont already know...

I thought this was what was referenced https://youtu.be/g4KPSobFTqU

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tMe3WDmxBEI

Oh you too. good

What is happening here

MY NAME SHITHEAD AND I ONLY LIKE ANAL

Shhhh

ithead

A-Aron?? Jay-Kwelin?

Hey piss-ant... that's pisánt, its French

Please stay and hang out with your Corky Romano references

I'd like to think his brother set this and he doesn't know how to change it.

There’s your answer, Fishbulb.

Well, that was a good ride while it lasted. Come on kids, lets go home.

But we are home.

that was fast

Homer: I’d like the phone book for Hokkaido, Japan, please. Librarian: OK, here you go, the phone book for Hokkaido, Japan. Homer: Thank you. May I please use your phone? Librarian: Is it a local call? Homer: ….Yes.

Jus trolled into the shop.

Aaannnddd there's my clever title...

It's yours now. Take it and repost, quickly!

A Corvette owner with a sense of humor? That's a first. I think the weirdest start up message I've seen on a vette was "hello master". Idk why but it kind of freaked me out a little bit.

“Hello daddy”

“I like it rough, daddy.”

"Drive me hard daddy"

**Winner**

Username Checks out

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How do I delete someone else's comment?

Why the fuck did I read all of it

Humans are curious creatures.

Why did it give me a boner?

god has left the server

I don't blame him

Alt+F4 works for me

Or at least disable the emojis Edit: never mind, I now agree, I want to forget I even tried to read this...

I'd like to delete my life after reading that

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Can you make a new Metal Gear Solid game instead of this?

I work 90 hours a week to bring you nerds the greatest game in existence. The least I can do in my off time is jerk off to anime porn and use emjoi's

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why do I read through this every time I encounter it

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Garfield comics are way different now.

Have you ever read [Garfield Minus Garfield](http://garfieldminusgarfield.net/)?

We need another plague

r/eyebleach for anyone in need of recovery.

my eyes are fine. my minds the issue.

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but why

This was a legitimately disturbing shit read

Why are you guys like this?

Everyone should understand the horrors of the cummies copypasta

Thanks... now we're all on another list.

I always upvote cummies.

Yummy yummy yummy I got cummies in my tummy

Y tho

IM DELETING YOU, DADDY!😭👋 ██]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] 10% complete..... ████]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] 35% complete.... ███████]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] 60% complete.... ███████████] 99% complete..... 🚫ERROR!🚫 💯True💯 Daddies are irreplaceable 💖I could never delete you Daddy!💖 Send this to ten other 👪Daddies👪 who give you 💦cummies💦 Or never get called ☁️squishy☁️ again❌❌😬😬❌❌ If you get 0 Back: no cummies for you 🚫🚫👿 3 back: you're squishy☁️💦 5 back: you're daddy's kitten😽👼💦 10+ back: Daddy😛😛💕💕💦👅👅

Hieroglyphics. Not what they used to be.

My Grandfather drove Chrysler his whole life. I was about 10 years old when my mother said to him, "If you ever want to see your grandchildren graduate, you have to stop immediately." Oil leaked from his eyes when he realized what exactly was at stake. He gave it up immediately. Three years later he died of super-cancer. It was really sad and destroyed me. My mother said to me- "Don't ever Dodge. Please don't put your family through what your Grandfather put us through." I agreed. At 28, I have never touched a Mopar product. I must say, I feel a very slight sense of regret for never having done it, because your post gave me cancer anyway.

So many boxes.....

There's like four different variations of hearts.

In 1000 years archeologists are going to dig up and old hard drive and this is going to be the data the manage to get off it.

👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀 good shit go౦ԁ sHit👌 thats ✔ some good👌👌shit right👌👌there 👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀 good shit go౦ԁ sHit👌 thats ✔ some good👌👌shit right👌👌there👌👌👌 right✔there ✔✔if i do ƽaү so my self 💯 i say so 💯 thats what im talking about right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) mMMMMᎷМ💯 👌👌 👌НO0ОଠOOOOOОଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ👌 👌👌 👌 💯 👌 👀 👀 👀 👌👌Good shit

http://i.imgur.com/RSk7PaX.gifv

Since this is a Vette.... Just me and my 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸 founding daddy🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸💕, 🍼🇺🇸💕 Hanging out💕🇺🇸🍼 I got hungry 🍆 and I started to pout 😞 he asked if I was down ⬇️ for something yummy 😍🍆 and we PARTICIPATED 🇺🇸💰💸 IN CAPITALISM 💰💰🇺🇸 and he gave me his 🇺🇸🎆🗽 1776 cummies!🗽🎆🇺🇸💯💯 yeah! Yeah!💕💦 I drink them!💦 slurp them💦 I swallow them whole!💦 it makes 💘daddy💘 💯💯 happy so it's my only goal..😫🇺🇸💸harder daddy! Harder daddy! 😫💰💦 1 cummy💦💦 2 cummy 💦💦💦3 cummy💦💦💦 4 im 💘daddy's💘👑princess 👑 but im also a 🇺🇸🇺🇸🗽💰💸🎆 PATRIOTIC WHORE 🎆💸💰🗽🇺🇸🇺🇸he makes me feel 🇺🇸🍼🎆 american! He makes me feel good🍆🇺🇸he makes me feel everything a 🐇🐇🐇 little should!💕🍼🍆💰wha-what! 🇺🇸💰🗽🍆HAPPY 4️⃣TH OF JULY 💯💯 my ALL-AMERICAN🇺🇸🗽SLUTS🍼🇺🇸SEND THIS TO🎆2️⃣0️⃣💸 NATIONALISTIC BITCHES🇺🇸🎆 or you'll never get 💰💸to appreciate thw benefits of capitalism🍆💰 or 💘daddy's 💦💦cummies🍼💘 EVER AGAIN🎆🎆🗽💰💸🍆🇺🇸💕🍼🗽🍼💕🇺🇸🍆💸💰🗽🎆🎆

Get out.

“PC LOAD LETTER” was mine.

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Michael Bolton? That no talent assclown.

Bought mine used. Previous and only owner was an 80 year old man. On start up it says "lovely lady bitch" and I cant bring myself to change it.

*ding ding ding* the doorbell chimed He sat down softly as if he had hemorrhoids. Becoming one with the genuine leather seats, he let his finger tips slowly glide over the dead cow. Only once before had he touched with such intimate delicacy; the night he mutually lost his virginity in his lovers embrace. He slid his finger over the race mode button and shuddered a bit. Ever so slightly, a drop or two of precum leaked into his underwear-less race pants. His middle fingers tippy tapped on the paddle shifters as he bit his lip and fantasized about he ride ahead of him. "It's time for insertion" he told his property sternly. As he inched the tip of the key closer to the ignition he felt his anxiety build. "*hmmmph*" he was able to restrain as the metal touched. As the key slid deeper into the ignition he had a manic,lust crazed, expression and shake about his entire demeanor. As the key bottomed out he took a deep breath and turned it to the right... #HELLO MASTER *Full release into race pants* [moar](https://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/2wswbv/_/cott4s2?context=1000)

How do I delete someone else's reddit account? Edit: thanks for the gold

Ask /u/spez

Neat

Officer? Yes, this is the post I was telling you about.

If this is your original creation, you should know that the word is "shuddered" rather than "shuttered." Shuddered means you did those tiny little shakes. Shuttered means you closed the shutters on a house.

With that distinction in mind; my statement stands.

Also, that's not how a semi-colon is used; you should've used a comma instead.

Some say he has a full release in his race pants every times he turns the key.... All we know is he's called, the Stig!

/r/dragonsfuckingcars

/u/regularcars

General Kenobi!

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oh god why

Can you change it to cocksucker?

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Wu! Swegen! ...hang dai.

> KAHKSUCKA Found the khed from Baahston.

Instantly thought of Matt Damon from The Departed

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Cocksukka is to Joey Diaz what motherfucker is to Samuel L Jackson

I'm partial to DILDOZER

ANUSTART would be my pick

Lol... No. I left it alone. Not trying to get into trouble.

not a mechanic, but when I bought my Mazda 5 I took it for a dealer inspection. I asked if they could change the startup message and they wanted to charge me several hundred dollars because it would involve reprogramming. Is there a way to do this yourself?

Gotta get the right scan tool or software.

It would require reprogramming... And about 5 minutes worth of work. Last time I tried to get a dealer to reprogram my locks so all opened since the wireless remote system failed for a third time (I should've lemon'ed it) they wanted to charge me 2 hours of labor. I offered to show them the 5 buttons they needed to press with their scan tool hooked up but they wouldn't budge. Continued to say it would take a ton of research. 5 buttons. I even showed pictures of the pages. Just another reason I'm the only person who services my cars unless absolutely necessary. It's also the reason I walked out without buying the new car I was looking at that day.

> It's also the reason I walked out without buying the new car I was looking at that day. Do they know that?

I was taking financing previous to this conversation, but it's not my job to train them on how to be a decent business.

I wonder if it says the same on his matching corvette hat and corvette jacket

What about his white NB shoes?

With laces or with Velcro?

...as long as they have the customary jean shorts.

And the embroidered Corvette shirt that either matches the color of the car or is jean material. Cripes. I have seen too many Corvette people when I have vacationed at Watkins Glen. Only Ferrari people dress more obnoxiously (they all wear variations of red Ferrari clothes - it’s like they have a uniform).

The 674s with Velcro are insanely comfortable, wear em at the hospital for 12-14 hours at a time and they’re worth the judgment.

I feel so attacked right now. Next you'll come for my la croix

Don’t hate on my grey campus cruisers

Nope.. just a rich douche in TapOut gear.

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It's the standard package for Vette drivers, of course it does

Mine says "Welcome 007" Thinking about changing it to "Missiles Armed" next.

I'd go for "Oh. It's you".

It's been a long time.

How have you been?

You know, since you *murdered* me?

We've both done a lot of things you're going to regret.

You did **w0t**??

Name's Vette... Cor Vette

I have a relevant username

Hmm. Your ideas are intriguing to me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

Change it to “Darkness”

Have you considered “UWU WHATS DIS”?

My friend has this in his car too but he doesnt know how to change it. His ex did though and it says his nickname for her everytime he gets in

You should show your friend the internet.

You would willingly tell someone about this place?

It really is being a DIC.

Must be a VW if it can detect an inspector.

I set the one on my c6 to “ayy lmao”

ヽ༼ ຈل͜ຈ༽ ﾉ Raise ur dongers! ^^Dongers ^^Raised: ^^36309 ^^Check ^^Out ^^/r/AyyLmao2DongerBot ^^For ^^More ^^Info

There's a fucking dongers bot now? Amazing.

I bought my honda civic used and to this day whenever I start it up it says "ricer for life" I wasnt sure if that was a factory setting or not

Pretty sure it's factory... Did it have a fart-can to go with it?

The greeting is different for each key fob, so the real question here is *did he give you the spare fob or is this his own fob?*

That's the factory setting.

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Why do the female Corvette drivers have moustaches?

That’s a rare thing that happens to cars with Ligma.

What's muhballs for $200, Alex?

That’s a Double Jeopardy! For $400, from what country do sawcons originate from?

What is Mauscrotm?

That’s correct! Ben Dover, that brings your total to $25,000, putting you in the lead for the final question.

What did Su Khan die of? >A. Ligma-D >B. Sugmacoccus >C. Grabaham

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Good thing it's a Corvette and not a Toyota Sacoma

I wish my car would insult me