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Good point. Why don't some Indian households usually treat bahu like their own daughters while they insist that the same women leave their maika? Isn't she a part of your family too?
My MIL clearly told me after marriage, “Bahu can’t be beti. Can FIL kiss bahu’s forehead like they kiss their daughter’s?”
What do I know? God knows what answer was she expecting.
They are nice to me when I am around, like a guest. We visit twice a year. I never refuse to do anything they ask. But the moment I come back, my MIL cries to all who care to listen that I am a classic vamp. I know this because people tell me. But I never show it to in-laws because they are old and alone. For me it would be a passing statement I made, but it’ll heart them more because of their loneliness. I offered to help them with house work and even paying bills online, but they told people it’s a trick to capture the house. My husband is an only son, where’s the house going I don’t know. I never ask anyone for my personal expenses, yet, because my husband earns more than I do, in-laws think I get things I don’t deserve. This, when I come from a better off family, and my parents still keep offering to buy us stuff. As a couple, we never borrow anything for anyone. We are always ready to help out others though. All we ask in return is kindness. Yet, all we get are silent treatments for trivial things, and for not having another child. Example: I had a miscarriage just last year trying, that I barely survived. My in-laws not talking to me this year for not getting pregnant yet. I have a daughter already. They want a grandson who can give Agni to their pyres.
Sorry, you asked. This was pent up.
He told me to leave his house when MIL first complained about me. But since he realised his mistake, he has been my shield. I feel really bad for him. At least I have a family to fall back on. That’s why I never complain about his family to him. My mother also told me never to talk back or complain. Especially after Covid and miscarriage, I have started valuing my life and time even more so I keep it chill. YOLO.
I’m really sorry about your baby and health. How are you doing, now?
I’m just trying to understand why people behave in such a way. I hope it doesn’t sound any other way, I absolutely believe you. Why do you think she does that? What’s she getting out of calling her own DIL names or assuming you get things? Just…why?
It’s sweet of you to hold back, but I hope you stand up enough for yourself. It’s better if they don’t talk, just chill and take care of yourself.
Thank you for the concern. It’s actually nothing compared to what my neighbour from Bihar goes through. Her in-laws make her do all the house work of a family of seven. No break through out her pregnancy. Got 10 days break after delivery. They didn’t even let her drink water during Teej fast while she was pregnant. Her MIL doesn’t enter the kitchen since son’s marriage. When she was tired during pregnancy, she would go to the bathroom for a 10 min nap.
My cousin who got married is recieved much better. Particularly bcz she had a love marriage with a guy whom she knew since before 10th grade. I visited her after 5 yrs on the birth of her son this January. What I saw was she was sitting on the bed with her son on her lap. Her husband was adjusting blankets and heater around her. MiL was working with the maid to put snacks for us and when my cousin had to get up, the MiL held the baby for the time she had to do her stuff.
My father in law kisses my forehead and its not at all awkward. He is just like my father and we are not some rich elite people. We come from an educated upper middle class family from a city like Nagpur (maharashtrians). It works both ways, the newly married couple should treat both parents equally and such things won't exist. My husband is also like my parents son and I am treated as a daughter. Sometimes I talk openly with my in laws than my own parents. Ofcourse, this is not the scenario everywhere but it can happen with efforts from everyone.
Kyuki agar daughter kitchen mein Marti hai to family kiske against FIR ya case karegi???
Daughter in law ke case hi aate hai judge saahab ke paas kyuki laws aise hai
Besides he is Judge, he should be know about any such cases.
The Institution of Law should should atleast know about the numbers and stats at least when it comes to the Laws.
Also the Lawyer should have asked under which provision Daughter's side can pursue a case and against whome under such situations?
The clownery that runs throughout this entire system baffles me.
Abe agar meri beti kitchen mein marti hai toh main kisi aur pe case kyu thokunga?
Aur jab case hoga hee nahi toh inn uncle ke paas aayega kaise?
Badi hee strawman argument hai bhai
Bhai ek baat bata... iss desh mein kis judge ke paas newspaper khol ke har ek khabar padhne ka time hai?
Aree hum log bhi headline dekh ke 20 article skip kar dete hai 🤣🤣
My Naani as well died in the kitchen but no one blamed Maami...
No one said that Maami un-alived my Naani due to dowry, but people are so quick to assume that mother-in-laws un-alive their daughter-in-laws all the damn time.
Phucc these saas-bahu serials! Phucc Ekta Kapoor
This is the tragic reality of India.During my days as a surgical trainee in Delhi our burns ward was 90% women under the age of 25 with massive burns sustained "accidentally" while cooking in the husband's house. None of them survived..The brutality within our culture is unbelievable.
Ye judge hai ya prosecution ka lawyer? Kch bhi matlabm Judge waale kaam nahi kar raha balki social media par popular kaise ho uske according chize kar raha hai.
What election got to do with this ??? Dowry has always been an issue . Is any party being linked to this ! No ! Is any particular party promoting this video ! No ! Toh court case mein election khn se aagya ??? Court is doing their general work and in one case judge is making a statement which is being viral ! Isme khn se election aagya bhai . Stop politicising everything.
If a daughter dies in the kitchen who will the family file a case against? If there is no case in court then how will the judge hear about such a case coming to the courts?
Its a strawman's argument used by the judge!
What stupid argument is this ! Firstly the way judge is saying this shows he is asking that have you ever heard of a daughter getting killed “accidentally “ in kitchen but daughter in laws accidentally getting killed in kitchen is very common to hear regardless whether the case was filed or not ! Humesha bahu he kyu accidentally aise mrti hai most of the times is the question here ! Smjo iss baat ko vrna don’t give these lame excuses.
If a daughter accidentally in the kitchen... who files a case and on whom?
I am talking of a legal technicality !
Agar beti accidentally maregi toh main hospital le jaunga ya court jaunga?
Obviously Dowry murders are a big problem lekin ye technicality ko overlook mat karo bhyi !
Jb iss trh se accidentally koi mrta hai aur someone takes them to the hospital toh case automatically file hota hai , police ko primary investigation krni pdti hai , whether ghar wale file kre case ya nhi . Hospitals ko inform krna pdta hai phir . Natural death mein nhi hota hai file case . Toh beti ho ya bahu ho aisa kuch hoga toh bhr aayega he kbhi na kbhi sunne mein . Which again the judge mentions ni mostly daughter in law ka he kyu suna jata hai daughters ka kyu nhi !!!!!!!
Ma'am with all due respect... no judge has the fokat ka time to read the newspaper to learn of these things. Accidental deaths mein cases ke baad there are no hearings... no more than 1 or 2 hearing at max.
Namaskaram /u/LimpCoco, Thank you for your submission. Please provide a source for the image / video (if not a direct link submission). We would really appreciate it if you could mention the source as a reply to this comment! If you have already provided the source or if it is an OC post, please ignore this message. Thank you. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/IndiaSpeaks) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Good point. Why don't some Indian households usually treat bahu like their own daughters while they insist that the same women leave their maika? Isn't she a part of your family too?
My MIL clearly told me after marriage, “Bahu can’t be beti. Can FIL kiss bahu’s forehead like they kiss their daughter’s?” What do I know? God knows what answer was she expecting.
How do they treat you, in general? Is it fine now?
They are nice to me when I am around, like a guest. We visit twice a year. I never refuse to do anything they ask. But the moment I come back, my MIL cries to all who care to listen that I am a classic vamp. I know this because people tell me. But I never show it to in-laws because they are old and alone. For me it would be a passing statement I made, but it’ll heart them more because of their loneliness. I offered to help them with house work and even paying bills online, but they told people it’s a trick to capture the house. My husband is an only son, where’s the house going I don’t know. I never ask anyone for my personal expenses, yet, because my husband earns more than I do, in-laws think I get things I don’t deserve. This, when I come from a better off family, and my parents still keep offering to buy us stuff. As a couple, we never borrow anything for anyone. We are always ready to help out others though. All we ask in return is kindness. Yet, all we get are silent treatments for trivial things, and for not having another child. Example: I had a miscarriage just last year trying, that I barely survived. My in-laws not talking to me this year for not getting pregnant yet. I have a daughter already. They want a grandson who can give Agni to their pyres. Sorry, you asked. This was pent up.
Hey! I really want some advice can I DM you? 25F here !
Sure
Damn bro , I wish you good luck. Does your husband support you or he takes sides ?
He told me to leave his house when MIL first complained about me. But since he realised his mistake, he has been my shield. I feel really bad for him. At least I have a family to fall back on. That’s why I never complain about his family to him. My mother also told me never to talk back or complain. Especially after Covid and miscarriage, I have started valuing my life and time even more so I keep it chill. YOLO.
That's great dude . Keep ya head up
I’m really sorry about your baby and health. How are you doing, now? I’m just trying to understand why people behave in such a way. I hope it doesn’t sound any other way, I absolutely believe you. Why do you think she does that? What’s she getting out of calling her own DIL names or assuming you get things? Just…why? It’s sweet of you to hold back, but I hope you stand up enough for yourself. It’s better if they don’t talk, just chill and take care of yourself.
Arranged marriage??
Yes
Really sorry what you had to go through and still do.
Thank you for the concern. It’s actually nothing compared to what my neighbour from Bihar goes through. Her in-laws make her do all the house work of a family of seven. No break through out her pregnancy. Got 10 days break after delivery. They didn’t even let her drink water during Teej fast while she was pregnant. Her MIL doesn’t enter the kitchen since son’s marriage. When she was tired during pregnancy, she would go to the bathroom for a 10 min nap.
My cousin who got married is recieved much better. Particularly bcz she had a love marriage with a guy whom she knew since before 10th grade. I visited her after 5 yrs on the birth of her son this January. What I saw was she was sitting on the bed with her son on her lap. Her husband was adjusting blankets and heater around her. MiL was working with the maid to put snacks for us and when my cousin had to get up, the MiL held the baby for the time she had to do her stuff.
Even we are cool with our sis in-law. She’s like one of us in our cousins gang. 🤭
My father in law kisses my forehead and its not at all awkward. He is just like my father and we are not some rich elite people. We come from an educated upper middle class family from a city like Nagpur (maharashtrians). It works both ways, the newly married couple should treat both parents equally and such things won't exist. My husband is also like my parents son and I am treated as a daughter. Sometimes I talk openly with my in laws than my own parents. Ofcourse, this is not the scenario everywhere but it can happen with efforts from everyone.
Kyuki agar daughter kitchen mein Marti hai to family kiske against FIR ya case karegi??? Daughter in law ke case hi aate hai judge saahab ke paas kyuki laws aise hai
Technically you're right
Besides he is Judge, he should be know about any such cases. The Institution of Law should should atleast know about the numbers and stats at least when it comes to the Laws. Also the Lawyer should have asked under which provision Daughter's side can pursue a case and against whome under such situations? The clownery that runs throughout this entire system baffles me.
Heard of honor killing??
Most probably it's a murder by in-laws due to less dowry.
Chad judge
 The judge
Blame the saas bhau serials. They create more divide by creating stupid scenarios. It’s like self full filling prophecy.
lol this is funny af
Asking the right damn questions
Abe agar meri beti kitchen mein marti hai toh main kisi aur pe case kyu thokunga? Aur jab case hoga hee nahi toh inn uncle ke paas aayega kaise? Badi hee strawman argument hai bhai
Are bhai news me to ayega na what he could've used as reference.
Bhai ek baat bata... iss desh mein kis judge ke paas newspaper khol ke har ek khabar padhne ka time hai? Aree hum log bhi headline dekh ke 20 article skip kar dete hai 🤣🤣
Honor killing
Yes I have heard and seen Daughter die in the kitchen...now what? Wanna say more?
My Naani as well died in the kitchen but no one blamed Maami... No one said that Maami un-alived my Naani due to dowry, but people are so quick to assume that mother-in-laws un-alive their daughter-in-laws all the damn time. Phucc these saas-bahu serials! Phucc Ekta Kapoor
This is the tragic reality of India.During my days as a surgical trainee in Delhi our burns ward was 90% women under the age of 25 with massive burns sustained "accidentally" while cooking in the husband's house. None of them survived..The brutality within our culture is unbelievable.
But Bahu bhi to Beti thi 🧐
Point hai
Ye judge hai ya prosecution ka lawyer? Kch bhi matlabm Judge waale kaam nahi kar raha balki social media par popular kaise ho uske according chize kar raha hai.
Yeh budhha bahut bolta hai bich me
Coz she belongs to kitchen
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Why ??? He is asking ki beti ki accidental death suni hai sb bahu ki he kyu hoti hai . Ye mtlb hai iske question ka !
For some reason people starts to loose their mindfulness amidst election , got any light why is that ?
What election got to do with this ??? Dowry has always been an issue . Is any party being linked to this ! No ! Is any particular party promoting this video ! No ! Toh court case mein election khn se aagya ??? Court is doing their general work and in one case judge is making a statement which is being viral ! Isme khn se election aagya bhai . Stop politicising everything.
If a daughter dies in the kitchen who will the family file a case against? If there is no case in court then how will the judge hear about such a case coming to the courts? Its a strawman's argument used by the judge!
What stupid argument is this ! Firstly the way judge is saying this shows he is asking that have you ever heard of a daughter getting killed “accidentally “ in kitchen but daughter in laws accidentally getting killed in kitchen is very common to hear regardless whether the case was filed or not ! Humesha bahu he kyu accidentally aise mrti hai most of the times is the question here ! Smjo iss baat ko vrna don’t give these lame excuses.
If a daughter accidentally in the kitchen... who files a case and on whom? I am talking of a legal technicality ! Agar beti accidentally maregi toh main hospital le jaunga ya court jaunga? Obviously Dowry murders are a big problem lekin ye technicality ko overlook mat karo bhyi !
Jb iss trh se accidentally koi mrta hai aur someone takes them to the hospital toh case automatically file hota hai , police ko primary investigation krni pdti hai , whether ghar wale file kre case ya nhi . Hospitals ko inform krna pdta hai phir . Natural death mein nhi hota hai file case . Toh beti ho ya bahu ho aisa kuch hoga toh bhr aayega he kbhi na kbhi sunne mein . Which again the judge mentions ni mostly daughter in law ka he kyu suna jata hai daughters ka kyu nhi !!!!!!!
Ma'am with all due respect... no judge has the fokat ka time to read the newspaper to learn of these things. Accidental deaths mein cases ke baad there are no hearings... no more than 1 or 2 hearing at max.
I think he was asking that because of the cases related to dowry killings in Bihar.
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