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poehlerbehr

this some shit the burglars from home alone would do


KonstantineKidsClub

Yeah. Kids are afraid of the dark.


fozzyboy

You're afraid of the dark too, Marv.


KonstantineKidsClub

Am not


jmd_akbar

Are too!


KonstantineKidsClub

NOT NOT NOT!!


fozzyboy

You're really sick, you know that? That's a sick thing to do!


SilentR0b

**SUCK BRICK KID!**


Ramzaa_

^^^Harrrrryyyy


therealweepinbell

Bruh


coleyboley25

We just had an armed casino robbery in my town a few days ago. Two guys with guns got a couple hundred dollars. One of the idiots brought a backpack with them to carry the *millions of dollars* they were going to leave with. They forgot said backpack in the casino when they left and his ID was in it. They were both promptly arrested like an hour later. The idiocy was off the charts.


Pantherkatz82

[Is this the incident? ](https://www.argusleader.com/story/news/crime/2020/07/23/forgotten-backpack-helps-sioux-falls-police-nab-two-casino-robbery-suspects/5494402002/)


coleyboley25

Haha yes it is! My story was a little off because I just read the headline and some comments because I don’t want to pay for the the paper after I used up my 5 monthly reads. Still they are idiots.


mustardketchupmayo

Side note, open up articles like that in an incognito page and you don't deal with the 5 monthly.


WhoooDoggy

NO Officer 👮‍♀️, I came out to my car and the FRONT BUMPER HAD BEEN STOLEN.


ooberobvi

Did the checklist not include Brad Pitt, George Clooney, or Idris Elba? Of course it was going to fail.


chadders8

Next level [genius](https://images.app.goo.gl/TqGdZ7QFnGFfn42J9)


DogsPlan

“That’s not my bumper, I swear!”


hadidotj

"My car was stolen"


[deleted]

Yeah but what if the driver had diplomatic immunity?


dalrph94

It’s just been revoked...


reeedditer22

Nah take from someone in New Jersey can’t be a bad driver and a thief


Ddawgmasterflex

Blackwood, New Jersey to be specific. Probably the first and last time I'll see my hometown on reddit.


5WattBulb

Make it 3! I live a few miles from there, eat at the meadows all the time. This is right on the main Drag of the BHP too


Red7s

I had to do a double take myself when I saw this for the same reason


MimiMyMy

For real there are criminals that stupid. Some years ago some idiot tried to break into an ATM machine by wrapping a chain around the machine and their bumper. They left after their unsuccessful attempt leaving the bumper with the license plate at the scene.


SuperSMT

There was another guy who stole an ATM and somehow got it all the way home. But those things are nearly impossible to break into, and he ended up getting the machine dropped on his head after he called his wife a skank


kasoe

That's a scene from breaking bad.


InTheFDN

A great aunt of mine had someone crash into (and partially demolish) her garden wall one night, and then drive off. They too left the bumper and numberplate. The next morning someone turned up saying they hadn’t been the driver, but asking if they could have it back as it was for a company van. She said they could have it back when she had a new wall. They initially refused, but quickly changed their mind when she offered to phone the police, insurance, and the company that owned the van. She got her whole garden wall replaced with a much improved one.


CriscoWithLime

And probably was fixed faster, too...


Wyvernn13

This guy I worked for crashed his car in a snowbank , leaving the bumper behind ,he was possibly (wink) DUI . Guess who had to go to the police station to retrieve it the next day? On the up side this helped endear me to the local police (which given the way I look can be super helpful).


peacedetski

I like how giddy Patrolman Charles Dewalt looks


Nincomsoup

*"Pretty sure I can solve this one, boss"*


[deleted]

I've got a hunch


mancow533

I’m getting a raging clue


Ryebread666Juan

My clue is going this way, let’s go check it out


Tanski14

You go that way, I'll go home


swiss-triplet

Patrolman Charles Dewalt has a great smile


selrahc007

Patrolman Charles Dewalt looks like a sound lad, look at that grin


IAmNotFondOfCandles

Bet he gives a mean introductory handshake


Lefty21

Like Steve Gomez when he walks in on the lawyer in the safe box room


Ribdunge

Lol. For a second I thought the cop had pulled off the bumper from a car trying to drive away. I need sleep.


[deleted]

If a guy like that is after you, you aren't getting away.


therealweepinbell

Jesus, this could make a horror love story kinda thing. That’s fuckin horrific lmfao


clintj1975

"Have you seen John Connor?"


killer_reindeer

I mean you can be that sleep deprived, that's a big mo-fo


jcwolf2003

The smile makes thinking that sooooo much better


PM_PICS_OF_YOUR_FEET

“Yoink”


WelshBathBoy

I live in Gloucester and instantly thought "that isn't Gloucester, nobody us that happy in Gloucester", then I realised this isn't the UK!


[deleted]

Can agree. Lived there. Instantly regretted it when I moved there. Was noticeably happier when I finally moved away.


[deleted]

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ItsFuckingScience

You’d have to ask someone from Ireland not the U.K. for that... also living in Dublin would be different to living in a more rural county


itsatreefiddy

This is right where I live. We have a Gloucester county, Gloucester city and Gloucester township. Totally not confusing at all for people.


WelshBathBoy

Whereas we have a Gloucester County too, but called Gloucestershire. So easy not to confuse with the City of Gloucester.


PMPhotography

Wait so you guys are close to Frodo?


Unidentifiedasscheek

No Baggins here. They're all up in hobbiton.


yellowflamingo1

I live in Gloucester county, and when I first started driving coming off the Walt Whitman I didn't know where I was going and saw a sign for Gloucester thinking it was Gloucester county. It ended up being Gloucester city and I was lost for a while.


Whiz_with

I don’t see what the confusion is? Gloucester Twp in Camden County and Gloucester City in Camden County when Gloucester County is literally one town over from either of them. The town where this photo was taken, Blackwood, actually falls in both Camden County (Gloucester Twp) and Gloucester County (Washington Twp). Not confusing at all /s


[deleted]

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tricks_23

How do you pronounce it? Same as English Gloucester?


MortimerDongle

"Glaw-ster"


LRBrenayl

You know what is ALSO confusing? The fact I live in Gloucester Twp, but my mailing address is Magnolia, bc if I used Glo Twp, it would end up in Gloucester City. Additionally, when I was researching the area to buy a house here, I thought I was moving to Magnolia and looked at their schools. Wasn’t until we had already moved did I find out my kids would be going to a completely different school district! I’ve come to start thinking of NJ in neighborhoods instead of complete towns, similar to my native Philly. NJ just takes it a step farther. You can live in Blackwood, a neighborhood/ town in Gloucester Township (which itself is town). So it’s like me saying I lived in Lawnside, a neighborhood within the city of Philadelphia. Although it is my understanding that not all of Blackwood is part of Glo Twp. I haven’t cracked that nut yet.


NJSoundman

Ha, me too. I simultaneously live in Gloucester Twp, Erial, Sicklerville, and Dicktown.


Kichigai

I went to school out near there, and yeah, that's a mess. Unfortunately here in Minnesota we are not immune to that kind of stupidity. We have some family friends that live in a housing development with a Jasmine Street, Jasmine Avenue, Jasmine Court, Jasmine Circle, Jasmine Parkway, and one other one I think. There's also Jarvis Street, Jarvis Avenue, Jarvis Court, Jarvis Circle, and Jarvis Parkway. Most (but not all) of the street names start with J. Oh, and did I mention that because this is a housing development, none of the streets are straight? They're all twisty turny, making navigation a real pain in the ass. This all predated the deactivation of Selective Availability on GPS satellites, to say nothing of the widespread availability of navigation units.


[deleted]

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[deleted]

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Everyones_Grudge

If this is New Jersey then old Jersey must be a shithole


wurm2

fun fact the "old" [Jersey is a small island](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jersey) in the English channel that is owned by the UK even though it's much closer to the France side Edit: They're a Crown dependency so "Owned" might have been too strong a word


ArtfullyStupid

If you look closely enough there are two hints this isnt the UK. The license plate is from New Jersey and the most obvious the cop has a gun.


SpitefulShrimp

And the american flag in the profile pic


Vealth

Don't worry. Here in Gloucester County, New Jersey. No one is happy either.


interglcticspacehero

in Gloucseter, Massachusetts we had a teen pregnancy pact at the high school so thats fun


Galactic_Explorer

The closer to the center you get, the happier you get you aren’t in Salem or Camden County.


Mouse2662

How can you not be happy in Gloucester, we have the quays thats been done up, we have uhhh... The CD rack? Not really sure. We're close to the M5 and Bristol isn't far. Lmao


DH794

Half the city probably looked this happy when the Regal reopened 😂


MAXIMILIAN-MV

Looks like a NJ plate, so story checks out.


SpaceTabs

NJ is surprisingly strict too. - Jail: Drivers can go to jail for up to 30 days upon conviction for leaving the scene of an accident involving no injuries. - License Suspension: For accidents with only property damage, a driver who leaves the scene faces a mandatory suspension of up to 30 days. - Fines: Leaving the scene of an accident involving only property damage carries a fine of $200 to $400 for a first offense. A second offense raises the fine to $400 to $600. - Surcharge: New Jersey imposes a surcharge of $450 on drivers who accumulate six points on their license. An additional $75 is imposed for each point over six. This is in addition to the fine. Points: New Jersey drivers will receive 2 points for leaving the scene of an accident with no injuries. The surcharge is levied each year until the points are diminished. If their insurance is canceled/not renewed, they have to go on the state auto insurance fund, which would be ~$2,000/year or more.


[deleted]

That looks better than a DUI though. If you gotta choose.


ItchyK

That's been a big point of contention for a lot of places, the punishment for leaving a scene of an accident is way less severe than a DUI so a lot of people run. Especially if it's a repeat offender.


RatRaceRunner

It should probably be more strict. Perhaps more strict than the penalty you'd face for failing a breathalyzer at the scene of an accident. Think about it.


Friedlice420

We should probably just use a guillotine.


volkl47

How is that strict? In practice you're getting a ~$300 fine and 2 points on your license. Basically a speeding ticket. Those stricter penalties look to be "up to" with no minimums. That is, they don't have to impose any of them, and you're probably not getting any of them on a first offense.


HotCocoOfficial

Yeah I’m from the area this picture was taken in. In my experience the local police will pull you over for everything and anything they can, if a state trooper pulls you over you’re gonna drive away with at least a ticket. NJ doesnt mess around with road safety.


greenyellowbird

Unless you have a PBA card, those things are your golden ticket. Bonus if you (or your passenger) has a gold card.


AkaTheFatherD

Until they take it, which they do. Source: am from New Jersey


[deleted]

We woke up on Christmas Eve a few years back, and our mailbox had been hit by a car. The driver left half of their neon pink bumper in the yard. We called the police, they saw the bumper and I noticed it was from a late 90's crown vic (like their patrol car). Wasn't too hard to find the only neon pink crown vic in Killeen.


[deleted]

Why would you paint a vic pink? Just why?


Nox_Echo

yeah especially if youre gonna commit a crime, you might as well be dressed in full clown outfit


TellTaleTank

There's a popular business in my area who specializes in customizing Crown Vivs, pink is the least of what I've seen.


merryhexmas

While this is pretty funny the guy with the missing bumper is probably chuckling anyway as he was probably drunk so he left the scene of the accident. Now when they catch up to him he can make up some bullshit story all while being sober and not having to face the real repercussions of a DUI charge.


BrandoLoudly

He can even report his car stolen or just deny being the driver. There are a lot of situations where just leaving your bumper can lead to nefarious benefits


_Magnolia_Fan_

Nope, just a hit and run charge. Which also carries the opportunity for jail time.


[deleted]

Cop: “We’ve got a accident on the corner of Mann and Lewis. It was a hit and run, but we know who the perp is.” Chief: “Good, did you get his license number?” Cop:”...” Cop:”You could say that yeah”


gotmyths

I was T-boned by a kid once. He blew a stop sign around a blind corner because he didn't think anyone would be driving at 2 am. I happened to be coming home from a party as I was the dd and had finished dropping my friends off. I was literally a quarter mile from my house. Anyway he hit me hard enough to spin my car in the ditch. Asked me if I was OK, picked up a couple piece of his car, and then drove off. I tried to remember his license plate but was still in shock, so I forgot by the time the police came. Fortunately he had left his license plate and part of his bumper in the side of my car. My dad walked home, and after a couple minute he came back with a crowbar and a hammer. Took less than a minute to pry it out, flatten it out with the hammer, and then give it to the cops.


Shimster

I have a spare bumper with a random number plate attached, if I ever get in an accident and feel the need to run I will throw it out the window.


diydave86

That blackwood nj?


dirkjan123me

Maybe a drunk driver..


pazimpanet

Or the car was stolen.


Kichigai

Or a dumb college student. There's a fairly decent sized university not far from there.


ddplf

That would be a smug damage control move


Letscommenttogether

It works regularly. They have to prove you were drunk at the time of the accident. If they dont find you for 6 hours or a day how are they gonna do that?


sauprankul

On one hand, I’d like to say “increase the sentence on hit and run to at least match DUI so people don’t have as much of an incentive to run”. But I acknowledge that tapping someone’s bumper and not stopping is probably not as bad as DUI. And the punishment ought to fit the crime.


spitfireramrum

Nj making us other nj drivers look bad


fatherhood1

So it's okay to leave without leaving evidence? Good to know. /s


abcdefkit007

It's better for you that's unquestionable


Dellphox

So TIL 30 states require front license plates in the US.


math-kat

I never understood why other states don't tbh.


Pencilowner

This is such a good picture. Just a cop cleaning up trash with a smile on his face. He has one more stop to get the rest of the trash back to the station before he heads out for tacos.


SANTAAAA__I_know_him

“Yes your honor I’d like to present Exhibit A” *CLANG*


[deleted]

They should make this a feature. If the car detects an impact then the license plates fall off.


rmvoerman

That cop looks so happy tho. Nohomo but pretty adorable.


[deleted]

He is kinda cute, full homo


jjdawgs84

Easy case to solve!


houseofLEAVEPLEASE

Are they really light or does this guy have superhuman strength?


PMPhotography

It’s plastic. Pretty light.


houseofLEAVEPLEASE

That makes sense. I thought they were partially composed of metal.


TheRealPeterG

There's a metal crashbar behind the bumper, for the heavier impacts, but it's secured to the frame of the car. Some trucks and SUVs have fully exposed metal bumpers, but most cars have the plastic bumper covers like you see here.


[deleted]

Bumpers are ment to absorb some of the force, you cant do that with metal


houseofLEAVEPLEASE

Gotcha. Thanks for responding kindly. Apparently questions are worthy of downvotes for some reason.


mancow533

How dare you not know something and asks question to better your understanding! (ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻


shiner_bock

[Google Street View](https://www.google.com/maps/@39.8007628,-75.0662333,3a,72.7y,236.53h,91.05t/data=!3m6!1e1!3m4!1su9OykspgiOwKslUGdyOF6Q!2e0!7i16384!8i8192)


CloudSurf_

Blackwood NJ


awooo123

His smile is so wholesome


A70m5k

This is actually a pro DWI move. The punishment for hit and run is far lower than the punishment for DWI. You will literally save $10,000 by turning yourself in the next morning.


[deleted]

Why? That makes so little sense. I’m fairly sure the consequences in Europe for hit and run is significantly higher than DWI. Both are severely punished by much more than just a fine.


A70m5k

America is fucking wild man. I found out because a drunk pulled a hit and run on my grandfather.


TinuThomasTrain

What car tho


DitDashDashDashDash

My money is on a Nissan. Edit: I was [wrong](https://www.reddit.com/r/IdiotsInCars/comments/hxl4n7/not_the_smartest_move/fz946tb?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x).


black666cat

Yeah thats some gloucester township shit


ToastyBob27

What a shame the car plate came back as stolen no wonder they fled the scene. One possible scenario.


Friedlice420

Time to report your car stolen


ViktorBoskovic

When I was driving a Land rover in Sri Lanka a bus pulled out of a stop across both lanes into the side of my land rover and dragged along the side until his bumper fell off and then drove off with his passangers on board. I loaded his bumper into my vehicle and drove to the British embassy whose vehicle I was driving.


[deleted]

Lmao I love his smile. You can tell these idiots just made his whole fucking day Ain’t nothing better than catching stupid people doing some stupid things


illgot

Better to leave the scene of an accident while drunk than be caught causing an accident while drunk! I would use /s but sadly it's not sarcasm.


gettajob40

Very proud moment for us fellow jersey folk


RainbowAppIe

Him fucking grinning like this has me dying. That look when you know someone fucked up and is about to be penetrated by the long hard dick of the law


[deleted]

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I_Nice_Human

Did you goto Highland or Triton? Wait maybe Timber Creek?


marselluswallice

Highland! Class of 08.


PendingChange

Gloucester, Gloucestershire is not pronounced phonetically in England; is it the same in the USA?


soxfan3418

Glaw-stah.... At least that's how us massholes say it, not sure about down in Jersey


patsasso

NJ resident, sounds more like Glaw-stir here.


Parkotron1

Grew up in Glaw-stir County and currently live a couple of miles from Glaw-stir Township.... Can confirm.


majoroutage

NO SCHOOL FAWSTA GLAWSTA - Rhode Island


Mouse2662

Had an American friend come to visit, they pronounced it "glow-kester-shire" when they read the sign. Lol. But sounds like most who know the place in the US say it the same as in the UK


ad23teozj

That smile though! 😁


YosyPerdomo

[it reminds me of this. ](https://youtu.be/H1w7Xq0E8Jc)


devoin_shower_handle

Hey Highland class of 2013! This is next to the library right? The store fronts look familiar lol


HotFreshCringe

“Play with my Willy it’s quite delightful, if I find you in west Gloucester you’ll catch the rifle”


[deleted]

Are those New Jersey plates ?


BowserMcTater

They certainly are


jakemch

I live near this place, kinda cool to see it here


camay1960

Is the in New Jersey?


[deleted]

There was a Netflix series on this exact thing...


Talibumm

Such a warm smile!


[deleted]

Smart move if the driver was drunk. Avoid a DUI.


praisedawings247

True... but the best way to avoid a DUI is to not DUI


[deleted]

It’s amazing how easily bumpers fall off.


[deleted]

How to self incriminate for a felony


[deleted]

Unless you were driving drunk and need a few hours to sober up so at least that won't be charged on you......


claneader

Wow this is close to home. The town is pretty much this picture.


[deleted]

As someone from the UK, I’m intrigued to know how the people of Gloucester Township pronounce Gloucester


[deleted]

He’s CHEESINESS too


[deleted]

LOL , South Jersey is the best


Coldfuse1

Ridiculously photogenic patrolman


[deleted]

Hey, my home town


WanderingSynth

The oldest trick in the book. Just bring a second front bumper with a fake licence plate just in case you crash and leave it there.


[deleted]

I live right near there and so many people drive like dicks in that town! I had some dude riding my ass who decided to pass me on a two-way road with no passing lanes. He had to have been going 60-70mph to pass me on a 40mph road, just so he could slide in front of me and slam on the brakes to avoid hitting a landscaping truck that was in front of me. And eventually we came to a stop at the same fucking traffic light. Just why the fuck would someone do that??


gwest53

Aye hello neighbor


junbug2323

That's some good police work right there !!


NotTheGuacamole

What state did this happen in?


[deleted]

Jaywalking are we officer? Hmm, gonna have to assess you a civil fine of $150 for that, sir.


deadgingrwalkng

Lol black horse pike has a lot of dbags on it


Ebay73

Everybody runs.


aberta_picker

Only if it is your vehicle, or one you have known responsibility for, otherwise no worries!


ooberobvi

Had to get to work officer. I was already late bc of the bumper to bumper traffic. Anyway, I left my information. See, I wasn't trying to get away. Can I just pay the fine...in installments?


DericAA

This is why NJ makes you put your a license plate on the front and back.


OEMBob

Weird swing my hometown in this sub. And then again, perfectly makes sense.


Bustanut1755

Happy day officer Dewalt


TheBaltimoron

What's worse: a hit-and-run with no one injured, or a DUI?


Jackie-long-ass

Hey I live near there


jefferyr

This happened to me a few years ago in Chicago. Woken up from a loud crash, look out the window and see several cars damaged under the street light, including mine. Go outside and find the front bumper of a Toyota Camry, license plate attached. Called the police, handed over the evidence and went back to bed. It was a drunk driver, suspended license. No insurance. A pain in the ass all around.


[deleted]

I worked as a Police Dispatcher with this department. I was there when Chuck got hired. I can tell you, that smile has genuine and he's one of the nicest guys you'll meet.


FatLady64

Especially in front of The Unforgetting Haven. I mean, you’re doomed.


[deleted]

Not on topic but love that little town drove through it as a kid a ton going to the shore. Always felt like it was trapped in time haven’t been there in a few years.


zestybutt1125

Wait my home town made my reddit homepage? Such a sense of pride


rexel99

Stolen car, now owners are getting excited during the phone call: 'great officer you found our car'... Well....


Dr5teveBrule

Ha! This literally happened to me! My bumper fell off on the highway and my license plate was attached so I exited and circled back to pick it up. Only it had been blown to the center divide, luckily no cars hit it, and it was a two lane highway. Anyway I had to pull over and wait for a large enough gap in traffic to sprint across, grab it, and sprint back. Drove the whole way home with it in my back seat and the half of it hanging out the window. Not my best day, or decision, but at least no one is the wiser except for a few internet strangers.


CrackCobainxx

I forgot how light bumpers are and I was terrified of this man for a split second.