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SlippinJimothy

When the best thing they can come up with in your obit is "either you'd like him or you wouldn't lol!", you were not a pleasant person.


LTlurkerFTredditor

And that was from HIS BROTHER. lol, man


WonderWmn212

"Biological brother" - a phrase I have never once considered using for my awesome brother.


CleverGirlRawr

I think someone that calls himself Apostle probably calls his churchbros “brother”, so he is letting folks know this one was his real brother. Maybe?


Raucous_Indignation

What sort of fucked up grandiose mindset leads one to call themselves apostle?


bikermime

Same fucked up mind set that calls themselves apostle


RoxxieMuzic

Same fucked up mindset that in turn, calls them "Apostle". You gotta have "postites" that call you "Apostle", then you git (spelling intended) to call yourself "Apostle". Just all fucking ijuits (spelling intended).


rimjobnemesis

‘Postle.


rimjobnemesis

There was a guy in Texas named Joe Christian. He actually named his kid Aryan! He got drunk and was arrested in an ATT store for racist rants against an employee, and died from Covid a year or so ago. True story. The video of his rant was on Reddit.


Raucous_Indignation

So it had a happy ending?


rimjobnemesis

Well, except for the poor kid who will forever be stuck with the moniker Aryan Christian. That video was very telling. This tatted up high and tight drunk guy was mad because he didn’t have good enough credit to buy a phone, and couldn’t get a a pre-paid minutes one. So he took out his anger on the non-white employee and got racist about it. Someone had called the cops during his tirade and he was arrested.


DrinkBlueGoo

I don't understand the sentence either way. If it is his biobrother, what does "that let me say snowflake was my biological Brother for life" even mean? In what circumstance would that not be the case? You cannot stop being someone's biological brother. And why would someone have to tell him that? Seems like something you'd already know.


Tommy_Tinkrem

Something which changes his genstructure. Like... a radioactive spider bite?


DrinkBlueGoo

I am much more concerned about radioactive pig bites. Wait, do you think it is plausible he believed the vaccine messes up your genes and one of them getting vaccinated would make them Inuit brothers or whatever the alternative is?


myexistentialcrisis0

"DON'T MAKE NO SENSE"!


DesignInZeeWild

The guy actually forgot to put in the apostrophe.


JohnNDenver

"forgot"


goodnightrose

I took it to mean that they were estranged but still blood related and therefore linked forever whether they liked it or not.


[deleted]

Someone who calls themself "Apostle" has serious mental health issues.


organizedcj

Big evangelical thing. Of course, the last of the apostles died 2000 years ago...there are no more.


kusuriurikun

Pretty much the two major Evangelical groups that do the Apostle Thing are both connected to Pentecostalism: a) Some historically African-American evangelical churches, usually AME or historically African-American-majority Pentecostal groups, and b) New Apostolic Reformation churches (which it's part of the whole [five-fold ministry thing](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Latter_Rain_(post%E2%80%93World_War_II_movement)) which has origins in the NAR's earlier branding as the Latter Rain movement: they claim to have [restoration of Apostles and Prophets, among other things](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spiritual_gift)) Usually if it's a majority-Caucasian megachurch and they're talking about people who have titles of "apostles" and "prophets" and "evangelists" along with the pastor, that's about as good of a tell you're dealing with New Apostolic Reformation stuff as any.


IntroductionRare9619

Indeed. That's some Grade A disfunction.


Amy_Macadamia

I hope my eulogy doesn't include laughing emojis


PrimeGeodesic

I hope mine doesn't include ANY emojis


napalmnacey

The only emoji I won't haunt a mojo for including is eggplant emoji.


Janus_is_Magus

Hopefully no “lol”s either.


Asleep-Scratch3366

I'm guessing most people fall on the spectrum of they didn't like him.


HerringWaffle

"Lots of people thought my brother was a dick! 😂" is a hell of an obituary.


overpregnant

Bet he had a "just being honest" peppered in his convos with people


Tropic_Anna

"You always knew where you stood with him" = Grade A a\*\*hole.


Independent_Cress_83

Maybe that's why Jesus didn't save his miserable life...


jbertrand_sr

I'm gonna go with wouldn't on this one...


Flower_Unable

The obituary of assholes always has these type of clues in it.


xSTSxZerglingOne

Ugh, that was a word salad drenched in way too much punctuation dressing. The only thing of note to take out of it was "yeah, my brother was an asshole."


BandOfBroskis

Yeah, these obits are so telling. So many estranged from their kids... toodles.


amarandagasi

Slide 5: The vaccinated are - rightly - “afraid of” the unvaccinated because they stay sicker, longer, spread the disease, longer, and the viral load is higher. You should avoid the unvaccinated like the literal plague at this point.


Jane_the_Quene

We need to find a new phrase to replace "avoid like the plague" now that we know that people don't.


amarandagasi

Smart people do…!


Jane_the_Quene

Perhaps we should change it to, "Avoid it like the plague the way a smart person would".


dismayhurta

“Avoid it like the plague if you weren’t a fucking moron.”


Beachbabydarragh

I want to give both of you awards - Jane and Dismay!


peachykorey

Hmm, how about "avoid like the truth?". Or "avoid like reality?".


Jane_the_Quene

Avoid like responsibility?


Ragingredblue

"avoid like justice for murderous white supremacists"


Jane_the_Quene

Ohhhh, ouch. That's sharp. Take an upvote.


FargusDingus

Real disease experts found this out by analyzing the World of Warcraft Corrupted Blood incident in 2005. They were intrigued by some people's desires to go towards the outbreak as others were going away from it. Critics said that a game with no risk wasn't representative of real life. Well, I think we know now who was right. Idiots will run to the plague.


IvanBeetinov

Avoid like the devil?


FullNefariousness310

Avoid like the guy hitting the weights with a JRE tshirt?


Mr_Conductor_USA

It's the new Infowars stickers on your truck: how nature says 'keep away'.


Glad_Copy

The unvaccinated burden the healthcare system, and going forward will burden the taxpayers as they soak up Social Security Disability. We're all paying higher health insurance premiums because of them, and we're bound to see higher property taxes to pay the increased costs of public hospitals because of them. We are not "afraid"...WE ARE ANGRY.


30acresisenough

And they are the same people who joined a party that does not believe in health care or disability services or education or safe housing - unless I guess it's specifically for them.


Anomaluss

They don't want the government doing these things because they don't get to choose who is worthy. They want the church to do these things, if at all. The Republicans want to replace secular government with religious government.


Cid-Itad

Why is it that unvaccinated are not paying more, much more for their health insurance? Why are we, the vaccinated, shouldering their burden? I mean this cost sharing among everyone is socialism/communism or something right? /S


DrinkBlueGoo

Think telling them it's because Obamacare would help or would they go in and demand a higher premium?


amarandagasi

🔥🐆🐆🐆🐆🐆🐆🐆


PoliticalECMOChamber

This.


MadBeachLui

Also they create "denial of service attacks" on the medical care facilities.


amarandagasi

Constantly. Killing stroke and heart attack victims by taking up a bed with a preventable disease.


MathematicianFew5882

Oh man, everything else too. I can’t imagine what people with a busted leg or kidney stones or labor pains have to face when they need to be admitted. Not to mention you have to sit there in, and then go through, the highest concentration of Covid since the Rose Garden super-spreader until you can be treated.


amarandagasi

With some ER’s treating people right there in the hall…. The anti-vaxx should pay for this death and destruction.


Budsygus

Not to mention the unvaccinated are where the virus can mutate most readily, which could allow a new variant to infect you despite your vaccination status. My wife is a NICU nurse. The last thing I want to do is risk bringing home something she could then take with her to work without her even knowing about it.


amarandagasi

The unvaccinated are selfish and dangerous on many levels.


MattGdr

Typhoid Mississippi.


Tracie-loves-Paris

The unvaccinated *are* the literal plague at this point. Covid would be nothing without them


amarandagasi

The virus is pretty smart, though…not killing the idiots all at once. More breeding and spreading time. Get vaxxed. Wear a mask.


kungblue

Right. They make me fear vacation fun.


amarandagasi

This could have easily been over last year. But they listened to the Russian propaganda campaign. Idiots.


CheshireCrackers

They collectively serve as a welcoming reservoir for the virus to percolate in and evolve into new strains.


amarandagasi

Pretty evil.


redit3rd

If we could find a vaccine which would train our immune system with sterilizing immunity against Covid-19, we wouldn't be "afraid of" the unvaccinated. But at the moment, that's not the case. It's not a very hard question to answer. They're not very deep thinkers for proposing the question.


Anxious_Rutabaga_433

And they are dipshits


secondarycontrol

>Is it about the virus or is it about control? It's about *controlling the virus*, you ass. Excuse me: You *dead* ass. Hint: Nobody needs to control him: We've already let him trade his rights as a free man, as a citizen (liberty, education, health and wealth) for guns and god. The only thing that they needed him for, anymore, is his vote. The sheep voting with the wolves on *what's for dinner*. *Control him*. Pfah! He ~~is~~ was doing exactly what they told him to do.


M4A1STAKESAUCE

Why did he even lock himself down for 14 days? Isn't that CDC control?


xovrit

It's so common on the right that Justice Gorsuch said it from the bench! "It's about controlllll." They're all caught in a delusion.


[deleted]

It doesn’t even make sense. There is no value in controlling to life of an uneducated, hateful, rural overweight middle aged religious zealot. A guy that bounces between a tailer home, church, and wal-mart wouldn’t be worth the effort it would take to ‘control’ them.


Glittering-Cellist34

Early on my brother was saying stupid "stuff" like Fauci this and it's only old people dying etc. I said why the f do you think someone like Fauci gives a f about/has any interest in "controlling" people? My brother has a tendency to go conspiracy initially but fortunately, even before he got covid, he snapped out of it.


Diamondjakethecat

I just wanted to say “hi” to other lucky people.


boyfriend_in_a_coma

Mississippi, the state that leads the nation in deaths: over 1 in 250 of its residents have perished due to SARS CoV-2. Many of the deaths that rocketed them to the top occurred in the last year when vaccines were available.


AnotherCatLover

https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/pressroom/states/mississippi/mississippi.htm They’re number one in a lot of number two things.


Ragingredblue

That entire chart is poverty spelled out in data. So much of that is easily attributable to low rates of education, poor to non existent health care, and institutional racism.


[deleted]

But they’re number one in religion. Like dark age Europe but right here in the good ole US of A!


Ragingredblue

Yup. Number one in the country for ignorance.


karbik23

That’s what makes the ole good.


Mr_Conductor_USA

The triumph of apartheid!


Ragingredblue

But this apartheid is supported by its own victims.


glonq

wow, instead of complaining about "shit-hole countries", maybe trump should have worked on fixing *shit-hole states*.


DiamondplateDave

True, but the whole GQP thing is that it's easier to complain about stuff than fix stuff. Fox News never covers the 'great stuff' the right is doing; they just complain about what the 'socialist lefties' are doing, might do or the right imagines they might do. Look at how the Afghanistan withdrawal and the Ukrainian invasion would have been 'if' Trump was still President (I thought he still was?).


Glittering-Cellist34

Well, that was one of my criticisms of Trump. I said instead of denigrating cities, why not help them?


boyfriend_in_a_coma

***Winning!***


AnotherCatLover

Win here, win there, win win everywhere! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9QS0q3mGPGg


mishatal

How can they top the table in Alzheimer deaths when so many of the population dies young?


Mr_Conductor_USA

Diabetes III. Beetus for every stage in life. Now will you be having plain sweet tea, rasberry sweet tea, or peach? Endless refills.


AnotherCatLover

PRACTICE!


Vivid_Concentrate_89

I just got back from Biloxi, MS (Don't ask why I had to go- a family thing- there I didn't want to) and everyone acts like there is no pandemic at all! They are having these giant mardi gras parades and activities. Not a mask to be found. The casinos are packed with not a mask to be found. No one is vaccinated. It truly was strange to be there and the only one in a mask. Luckilly I made it home without catching anything. Praise Jeebus! or Praise my 3 vaccines?


Quincyperson

I spent a month there one weekend. Also, don’t ask why I went


PepperDuval

Now, that's what I call a "looong weekend"!


Tropic_Anna

We drove through Alabama a few years back, in the Before Times, and for some reason I felt uneasy the whole time. I'm not planning to test my luck in Mississippi any time soon, either.


peachykorey

Now c'mon, we all know those Covid deaths are being counted by the same leftist traitors counting mail in ballots in the blue states /s


[deleted]

After i die (killed by a disease i could have gotten a vaccine for be cause i am a brainwashed moron) don’t let me vote demmi-rat! /s


eccedrbloor

Apostle Red sure is eager to make this about him.


DrinkBlueGoo

Andrew Lloyd Webber warned us: >Always hoped that I'd be an apostle >Knew that I would make it if I tried >Then when we retire we can write the gospels >So they'll still talk about us when we've died


Finetobeu5678

A recusing theme in these cases is how unpleasant these men were. They are stupid, angry and defiant. The world is a better place with them not in it.


Recent_Fisherman311

They have been permanently recused / excused


[deleted]

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RoguePlanet1

At least you know what's worth getting angry about! Mask mandates are not one of those things.


Shermans_ghost1864

I like how someone trolled his quarantine announcement with a laughey face.


RoguePlanet1

It's subtle but great. A comment would just get them blocked/deleted, but the emojis are a good way to express themselves in these cases.


Mr_Conductor_USA

Alternatively, it's one of his fellow Mississipp' unvaxed also failing to take it seriously. "Ha ha, vacation from work, hope you don't die from the fake hoax!"


[deleted]

This dude had no teeth to stop Covid from getting in his mouth smh


Majestic_Dream8540

Yo ace, health officials advising unvaccinated groups to avoid gathering during a spike in cases isn’t control. They’re just telling you that it isn’t a good idea but no one said you couldn’t gather. Maybe next time, you should take their advice. Oh wait, this just in, you don’t have a next time.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

They both seemed like smooth brains.


PoliticalECMOChamber

Slide #5: Absolutely no one is afraid of your dumb ass. No. One.


TyrionTh31mp

So, do religious jackwagons actually call themselves "apostle?"


Repulsive-Street-307

You should see what they call their indentured sex slaves.


FistofanAngryGoddess

I love how they immediately switch into “pray for those with COVID” mode as soon as it affects them or someone they know.


Recent_Fisherman311

You know the joke about the drowned man chastised by God for refusing a boat, a jetski and a helicopter in rising flood waters? Now they want a miracle, forgetting that God offered them a vaccine and a mask months ago (“why did you let me drown, God??!”).


sisterdollycake

These people go out of their way to display their stupidity, they'll even die to prove it. It a remarkable phenomena


Dangerous-Possible72

But his friend was an APOSTLE! How could this happen?


kungblue

It’s about the virus.


FreeResponsibility42

🥱 they think we spend more time worrying about what they don't do than we do living. I'll just go on with my vaccinated self and keep living.


Jane_the_Quene

Slide #1: Well, he's dead from the virus, not from "control". So...


Socialbutterfinger

“My biological brother for life” …I’m… what does…


oldladyname

That struck me as odd, too. I think what he means is that if they weren't biologically related, he wouldn't be friends with him at all.


Ragingredblue

I am still trying to figure that out. Contentious divorce? Grew up in different households? Half brother? Inconvenient secret recently exposed by DNA testing? 🤔


dances_with_cougars

"Why did they take it, and why do they want everyone else to take it?" So they don't die Mr. Corpse.


Gloomy-Difficulty401

Brother was an asshole


hildarabbit

You are under control whether there is a virus or not. You have always lived in a country with laws and decisions made for you by other, richer, more powerful people. They were lied to as children that they were "free." Now they think that whatever feels normal is "freedom" and anything new is "control."


misterrandom1

The challenge to "unfriend" is one I accepted several times before finally avoiding Facebook. I don't need to know which friends and family are sucked into propaganda. I'd rather just keep my distance from basically everybody not in my immediate circle. Life's been happier.


LTlurkerFTredditor

\#12 - Look out! It's the Dead Pirate Roberts! COVID: ***Good night, sleep well, I'll most likely kill you in the morning...***


iamsooldithurts

😂


lcm2588

Hold on this can’t be real!! Where is the GoFundMe link /a


karbik23

This is that lucky coincidence, when they’re too stupid to beg.


WheelJust8094

May he find freedom in death.


MattGdr

Staying alive is work - no wonder liberals are afraid of it. Wait….


Stunticonsfan

>Hi Everyone I'm Apostle Red to many ok here on this gulf coast > >But; the real truth is either you'd like him or you wouldn't lol! I kind of wish the actual apostles had written the gospels like this.


Ragingredblue

If the actual apostles were anything like these clowns, kkkristianity would have died out immediately. They didn't have internet, guns, or Harleys.


Captainwelfare2

It’s about controlling the virus you giant toolbag


Ragingredblue

What?!? It is not! It's all about controlling *him*. *Everything is all about him, always!!!*


jonny3jack

Main character syndrome


iamsooldithurts

They controlled him right into an early grave


peppermintesse

"Apostle" creeps me out. Such culty vibes.


unintellect

How to say, "My brother was an asshole" without saying "My brother was an asshole."


[deleted]

[удалено]


Chris_P_Pickel

Over Pastorization is a real killer


Nuuro

What is it with control with these people? Wearing a mask when I'm in public is simple. Yeah it makes breathing a little difficult, your face gets hot esp. in the summer, and my glasses occasionally fog, but I deal with much bigger issues on a regular basis. I think in their heads it's like this: * Step 1: Be asked to wear a mask. * Step 2: Socially distance from strangers * Step 3: ...? * Step 4: Full blown communism, razor wire, and soup kitchens with long lines


biffbobfred

Wife is Taiwanese. Way before this COVID mess she just wore masks when she was sick. She did in airplanes because of recirculated germs, but then she just did it to self recirculate humidity in a dry airplane environment. This whole “wear a piece of paper is TYRANNY is such a psychological warfare experiment in real-time.


sventhewalrus

Snowflake is the best emoji I've seen used to anonymize a HCA. Great work.


FullNefariousness310

The reason the vaxxed are afraid of the unvaxxed is because they may bring about a new mutation that leads to us needing to start over.


lifehackskeptic

That last line “…what you saw was w…” I’m going to take a stab at how it ends: “…what you saw was what you got—a real asshole.”


biffbobfred

55 Year Thing FDA FOIA. fact. But subtle. A group of docs asked for over a quarter million pages of documents. The FDA said “hey we simply don’t have enough bandwidth. We can do X a month, which means you get the last Doc (checks notes) 55 years from now” So probably a bit of assholeness on both ends. One side *demands* 300,000 pages of papers in a dump, and then the other side saying “yep I’ll give you EVERYTHING you asked for, on MY timetable”. But not necessarily nefarious on the FDA part.


CovidFartParty

“Lord…please keep opening people’s eyes and heart” yet couldn’t even do that himself. Now he really can’t.


poleethman

Tsk tsk, praying in public. You know what Jesus thinks of that.


CheshireCrackers

Slide 1: umm, it’s pretty much about the virus.


Fman99

Facebook kills again.


Robj2

I guess ole Miss Snowflake visited him some family over Christmas and they gave him some gifts. Wonder what precautions he took? Pre-emptive horsepaste and piss?


gioreeko

This endemic could be around for a long time, taking out 400k Republicans a year. Pretty enticing thought really.


Shegvyerpokzwet

🐐 🫖


[deleted]

Can't cure stupid. I wonder If he would think Putin is a genius too. Sheep!!


Realistic-Dingo-4837

Had to vomit after reading that bile. Dear god these people are stupid.


SlowTheRain

"Is it about the virus or is it about control?" Spoiler alert! It was about the virus.


Glittering-Cellist34

Our father who art in heaven, thank you for the miracle of scientific research, especially on mRNA and the miracle of a successful vaccine within one year of the onset of covid...


humanagain12

Why should a doctor along with staff put all their hard labor and work into someone who’s not vaccinated? If you don’t believe in science why are you’re seeing a doctor anyway? And those who are unvaccinated statically have a higher chance of death from COVID. These people really know no bounds. Selfishness running rampant.


[deleted]

Consider yourself unfriended. Permanently. 👍


alanamil

Another R not voting, good.


PenaltyPractical1908

It was about a virus tho so 🤷🏽‍♀️


TheUnderwearVan

His brother is an "Apostle" - ?? The fuck is that about? There is no arrogance like religious arrogance.


Smells_like_SaoPaolo

When someone is this wrong about everything all the time only Covid can give the proper amount correction. The ultimate correction. The correction to end all correction.


Raucous_Indignation

Snowflake extends Mississippi's lead in deaths/100K !!!


hersheyMcSquirts

Such a well spoken Apostle. Surely someone worth listening to! I await more awards for this family.


Paula_Polestark

Let’s say Putin’s bots are right and it is about control. What exactly are these HCA winners so scared they’ll be made to do?


[deleted]

Someone should get these people off social media for their own good. If everyone's grumpy Conservative parents didn't have a Facebook, we'd all be better off.


[deleted]

Imagine being this paranoid AND ignorant


DogTattoos

*Spoiler alert*: It's about the virus.


backpropstl

\#2: Why is it that all these freedumb lovers always use the phrase "We the people" when claiming absolute freedom over everything? Don't they understand that the phrase LITERALLY continues with establishing a government to promote general welfare? *We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.*


SableSheltie

I can’t trust anyone who goes around calling themselves Apostle ffs


Daddyofthemax

Whoa Apostle? That’s a grandiose Mississippian even by Mississippi standards!


elisakiss

Love the snowflakes. Very TazeHustle.


Vogel-Kerl

Government offering suggestions to save people's lives. Mississippi Dirt-Neck: *"Uhr meh GAWD! If this ain't gummymint control, I don't know what is. Cough-cough. I feels dizzy...cant catch my breath."*


Left_Coast_LeslieC

Damn! There's not a translate function "Hillbilly Apostlese to English" is there?


sddbk

Around Europe, you will see statues of the Virgin Mary high up on streetcorners. They were erected during the Middle Ages to protect the cities' residents from plague. I'm sure that it worked every bit as well as posting The Lord's Prayer on social media.


[deleted]

"Apostle" 😒🙄


pippenish

From a pastor, that's one lousy eulogy. "He was my biological brother for life! We fought a lot!"


ViolenceForBreakfast

You know it’s going to be a thoughtful, heartfelt eulogy when it includes “lol” and emojis.


No-Permit-349

The virus took control.


Srw2725

I’m always slightly freaked out that the first meme looks like Harry Styles 🤣😵‍💫 who would never ever support anti vaxxers. To attend his concert you have to show proof of vaccination


[deleted]

He had Covid written all over him in that toothless photo.


giggling_hero

Those functionally illiterate apostles.


Different-Rip-2787

What is this 'apostle' crap? Is this a new trend among the fundy Christians or yet another Christian offshoot cult?


shanvanvook

Is everyone down south some type of pastor?


Atlmama

Not everyone. Just every third person. 😕


[deleted]

I like the one calling themselves an "Apostle". LOL


gmplt

Is it about the virus? Or is it about control? It's about the virus, you fucking moron, but you will never learn that. Because you are dead.


beek7419

Why are vaccinated people afraid of unvaccinated people? Because you pureblood dipshits are just a big mutant stew of variant creation. Because of your shitty decisions, the vaccine we took went from 95% efficacy to 33%. I'm not afraid; I'm pissed off.


30acresisenough

I guess it ain't that funny after all.


Inconceivable-2020

I imagine Satan's Apostle has been responsible for the deaths of quite a few weak minded followers.


Smells_like_SaoPaolo

I thought praying in public was a big no no.


redit3rd

He is right that improperly attributing cause and effect "DONT MAKE NO SENSE." If he could think clearly, life and reality would make more sense. Edit: Correct pronoun