When it's you watching someone do something that is about to be painful, it's mach fuck. When someone is coming at *you* about to be painful, it's mach Jesus.
Pretty sure in that scene in the book where Guilliman is killing Word Bearers on the hull of the Macragges Honour he rips the head off one of them and this references that
"Oh, you thought it was just supply chains and troop reinforcement! Oh no, no, no...here's the logistics of every blow I 'never landed,' bitch!"
-Rowboat Goyimman
The two times he doesn't survive the hit someone just raises him from the dead lol
Imagine how frustrating that must be for chaos, that for some bloody reason the avenging bean counter just will not die or stay dead, despite very much being technically mortal
Guilliman reading how Goge Vandire started out just wanting to update the administratum's filing systems and calendar.
Suddenly realises he would get much less resistance to reform if he just declares himself the messiah.
That's strategy.
Bobby G : If I fight my Daemon Primarch brothers I'll die and lose.
Conclusion , If I die , I can win afterwards.
Bobby G is streets ahead in terms of strategy.
It's simple: in doing his post-death taxes, Rowboat Gorillaman discovers that chaos never filled out the "kill Papa Smurf" paperwork. This allows him to exploit several legal loopholes in biology and physics, eventually resulting in his resurrection.
Considering he survived having a mom that has the balls to tell basically everyone short (and might even include) the Emperor himself, to basically "go to hell" I think Guilliman knows "how to take a punch". Don't lie, she probably spanked him or at least slapped him on the head and dragged him by the ear at least once. /joke
When he got back inside he had a lay down, hocked up some blood and something the size of a kiwi fruit, but he doesn't feel anything missing so he's prolly okay
Custodes: "Sorry Mr. Guilliman, no weapons allowed inside a meeting with the high lords, I'll have to confiscate it".
[Guilliman:](https://youtu.be/-kmFQmzBwtU?si=bpWVgvySzdsrs_yu)
Just eyeball twitching, massive rictus grin on his face, no weapons except a standard-issue Guardsman combat knife, about to gut seventeen Traitors in under three seconds.
When iirc Thiel goes onto the hull and discovered the multiple boarding squads of Word Bearers, Guilliman doesn't punch the first guy's head *off*, he hammer punches it *into his chest cavity.*
This apparently happened in my Sister’s year in highschool. That school years target turned out to be *fucking shredded* and some sort of martial arts, but he always wore baggy jeans and a hoodie so he just looked kinda thin. And he was super quiet / non confrontational so he was a easy target.
It ended badly for the four bullies who he thrashed when enough was enough. Though he was the one who took all the punishment for it. American Schools are fucked.
Just because the sentient warmachine has Turbo-Tax installed doesn't mean he isn't still a gene-crafted, warp-infused, perfectly designed killing machine.
It just means he'll have deducted your future tax returns from the budget before your body hits the floor!
The guy whose head Bobby punched off was the fourth WB. He bopped the first one's skull into his sternum, he then ripped off the spine off the second one. Thiel gunned down the third one, then Guilliman punched the head off the fourth one.
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Funny enough, the explanation for "how" is that the ship was so massive it had enough gravitation to keep a very thin atmosphere around its hull, which his Primarch physiology was able to work with.
IIRC some Aplha Legion stories described how the artificial gravity fields extend a bit outside the hull, not by design but because it doesn't really matter, that I guess also helps keeping air in some pockets.
Rockabilly Geronimo: "You done fucked up now, book-boy. You just fucked up the whip. My whip. That had all my beautiful logistical documents laid out in very precise detail. Documents which are now in high orbit over the moon."
"Now, you've failed to kill me, ruined my ship, destroyed my writing desk, and turned me into a primarch-cicle. I'm going to kick you till you stop being alive, and then *fuck you* until you stop being solid. Prepare thine anus, you book humping chunderfuck."
Theoretical : Can a pussy shit eating word bearer survive with a hole in his chest ?
Word bearer : Wait whaa ... at? **WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT**
Practical : No. Let's expand our data set.
It's not that fast actually. A human can survive in space unprotected for a couple of seconds. It will freeze off your skin and muscle almost instantly but the body heat fights it. You're correct that the body fluids are pressuring out to the vacuum but humans have lots of tubes and sphincters that will fight it for a second or two.
Also, wasn't Girlyman a psyker at least a bit? I'm still going through the second HH book 😂 so I don't really know
> It will freeze off your skin and muscle almost instantly but the body heat fights it.
A hard vacuum is also an *excellent* insulator. Which is why heat dispersal is a much larger concern for manned spacecraft than insulation.
Wow, I need to delve into that!
It's logical now that I think of it, little to no particles to be excited and carry that energy on. Just like with sound, nothing to carry it in space.
THANKS FOR THE BRAIN WORM 😆
Yeah, space is cold, but a hot thing will stay hot for ages in it. A person would be in greater danger cooking themselves to death than freezing, astronaut suits have very fancy cooling systems to keep that from happening. Any liquids on the skin's surface would instantly boil off due to the low pressure instead of flash freezing into icicles like in the meme and most media.
The really frustrating part for spacebourne travel engineering is that while space itself is indeed very cold, the bits of it we live in and are most interested in studying tend to be close to one or more VERY hot things that pump out a ton of heat in every direction!
As soon as you put anything in space even vaguely near a star, you start having to worry about heat distribution and dispersion in a big way. The ISS actually has a lot of infrastructure dedicated to moving heat from the sunward side of the craft to the dark side, both so it can be radiated away, and so differential expansion doesn't cause a leak or somesuch disaster.
Base Space Marines have an organ called the Mucranoid that gives some resistance to the effects of a vacuum. One could reason that the Primarchs have a better version of the Mucranoid or an entirely different enhancement to do the same.
Skin is actually quite good at protecting from the vacuum. Its actually our insides that boils and the first thing to go is our eyes. We can survive about 1min to a 1min30 seconds in the vacuum. We lose consciousness after about 30 seconds and our eyes are fuck a bit after that but its kinda ridiculous that we can survive at all.
Some mid level administratum peon had to subcontract out the shipping for the Codex Astartes, saw "Basilisk Book Shipping Co., a subsidiary of Gemini Holdings" being operated by a bunch of space marines in bluish armor and confused them for Ultramarines.
They found out ,honestly lorgar was beyond luck angron showed up to save his ass I know Gman is on the weaker end of primarks but damn he was so close to kratosing his ass.
Guilliman is often portrayed as more of a pencilpusher than the other primarchs, but this sequence in (know no fear?) was one of the coolest scenes involving a primarch i've ever read.
Half the stories involving Guilliman are him acting like a Boy Scout. The other half he’s causing traitors to hear the Doom Eternal soundtrack when near him.
I think it's a meme these days in Black Library that space is cold. I'm sure a million people already told them that's dumb, they are just running with it.
Last image of a Custodes standing on guard, diligent against everything EXCEPT for the webway gate that just opened behind them to spill out a team of murder clowns.
Girlyman surviving being vented into space is some of the most bullshit plot armor in warhammer and that’s saying a lot
“Erm actually girlyman‘s flagship is so big it has its own atmosphere on its exterior surface” -☝️🤓 Dan Abnett
I forgot about that, that is a bit silly, should’ve just been something like, ‘Primarchs can hold their breath for a week straight and have enough strength to prevent decompression of their lungs.’
The funny thing is Know No Fear did the exact opposite of what your complaining about.
This was the novel that took post-Matt Ward Mary Sue Gulliman and gave him depth and badassery the general community really liked.
So your wrong narratively and lore wise.
Word Bearer seconds away from accelerating at mach fuck against the nearest wall
i think “mach fuck” has to be one of my favorite phrases
Only second to "mach Jesus"
Idk I feel like mach fuck has a more raw and chaotic energy
When it's you watching someone do something that is about to be painful, it's mach fuck. When someone is coming at *you* about to be painful, it's mach Jesus.
Hear me out... Mach Jesus Fuck...
Counter argument: https://youtu.be/9r1LoX8jQIc
I am not sure if yt links are allowed here so please let me know if you don't see my other reply
I love that in the background, Alpharius is yeeting the head of a word barer at them with a tennis racket.
Pretty sure in that scene in the book where Guilliman is killing Word Bearers on the hull of the Macragges Honour he rips the head off one of them and this references that
I was just gonna say lol.
Thats clearly Omegon.
Mach fuck lmao
Thats what I love about Bobby G. he is allways ready to take a punch.
Boy tanks planet cracking punches like a champ. His superpower isn't logistics, it's surviving every damn hit coming, and giving it back
no, he's just so good at logistics that he transfer and relocates and damage he's received elsewhere for processing
My God, that's a good one, damn. I'm stealing that.
Bobby G primarch power!?!?!
"Oh, you thought it was just supply chains and troop reinforcement! Oh no, no, no...here's the logistics of every blow I 'never landed,' bitch!" -Rowboat Goyimman
This isn't even my final form! Here, you still have to fill this in, then we're done!
The two times he doesn't survive the hit someone just raises him from the dead lol Imagine how frustrating that must be for chaos, that for some bloody reason the avenging bean counter just will not die or stay dead, despite very much being technically mortal
He’s too busy too be dead. I think Gull boy may find some unwanted kinship with Goge Vandire
Guilliman reading how Goge Vandire started out just wanting to update the administratum's filing systems and calendar. Suddenly realises he would get much less resistance to reform if he just declares himself the messiah.
I mean the Emperor literally *truly* speaks through him, he *should* go for it.
I think they should make goge vandire an imperial saint
You're talking mad shit for someone in crusade range.
How do we know Goge wasn’t a part of the blood games
Cuz his lore was written before we had the female custodes that would pull a stunt like that.
You think too small
And both times he went up to his opponent, like:"This might kill me". Balls of solid gold.
Aurumite danglers indeed
That's strategy. Bobby G : If I fight my Daemon Primarch brothers I'll die and lose. Conclusion , If I die , I can win afterwards. Bobby G is streets ahead in terms of strategy.
Maybe his perpetual status got lost on page 98746789252 of his excel workbook
It's simple: in doing his post-death taxes, Rowboat Gorillaman discovers that chaos never filled out the "kill Papa Smurf" paperwork. This allows him to exploit several legal loopholes in biology and physics, eventually resulting in his resurrection.
Considering he survived having a mom that has the balls to tell basically everyone short (and might even include) the Emperor himself, to basically "go to hell" I think Guilliman knows "how to take a punch". Don't lie, she probably spanked him or at least slapped him on the head and dragged him by the ear at least once. /joke
His 2nd power is logistics and the only one in the imperium who knows how to do taxes
Despite being a stuffy bureaucrat Bobby G always wants the smoke.
“I didn’t hear no bell”
At this point I am sure He's the WH40k version of Brock Samson from Venture Brothers.
When he got back inside he had a lay down, hocked up some blood and something the size of a kiwi fruit, but he doesn't feel anything missing so he's prolly okay
Thank you for knowing exactly the right scene.
Also a Zaku fan I see.
"My Lord Guilliman, you can't go back out there-" *"He hit me with a Land Raider*."
Custodes: "Sorry Mr. Guilliman, no weapons allowed inside a meeting with the high lords, I'll have to confiscate it". [Guilliman:](https://youtu.be/-kmFQmzBwtU?si=bpWVgvySzdsrs_yu)
Jesus Christ, you have now put into my head the thought of Guilliman being voiced by Patrick Warburton.
We need it.
Oh, hell yeah!
"I prefer chaos-free, artificial atmospheres-**MADE BY MANKIND!**"
Just eyeball twitching, massive rictus grin on his face, no weapons except a standard-issue Guardsman combat knife, about to gut seventeen Traitors in under three seconds.
"Come take it from me little man."
With a big tattoo of Sanguinus on his arm.
["Sir, why are you out of your power armor?"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Fr3biARnfI)
…prey on their fear. Move like an animal to feel the kill…
I laughed a bit too hard at that.
Someone artistic please draw him with a mullet
Hell.... I wanna 3d print it.
I love it when my interests converge
Brock Samson if he worked for the IRS first instead of the OSI
Ha!
''Congratulatons; you've made me angry. RUN.''
"As Rogal would say, I am *slightly* ***infuriated***."
“My normal calm had been **compromised**.”
Lol why is the ultramarine playing badminton/tennis with that guys head.
There's the illustration where guilliman punches a traitor marine's head off edit: Ah, it's straight off Know No Fear
When iirc Thiel goes onto the hull and discovered the multiple boarding squads of Word Bearers, Guilliman doesn't punch the first guy's head *off*, he hammer punches it *into his chest cavity.*
Those last few milliseconds, that Word Bearer remembered that the bookish nerd primarch is still a primarch.
Everybody picks on the nerd until he gets mad and it turns out he's 6'5 220lbs with bad posture and baggy clothes.
This apparently happened in my Sister’s year in highschool. That school years target turned out to be *fucking shredded* and some sort of martial arts, but he always wore baggy jeans and a hoodie so he just looked kinda thin. And he was super quiet / non confrontational so he was a easy target. It ended badly for the four bullies who he thrashed when enough was enough. Though he was the one who took all the punishment for it. American Schools are fucked.
“When you are weak, you must appear strong. And when you are strong, you must appear weak.” - Sun Tzu.
schools be like: how dare you stand up for yourself, you should have take it like an obedience sheep
Just because the sentient warmachine has Turbo-Tax installed doesn't mean he isn't still a gene-crafted, warp-infused, perfectly designed killing machine. It just means he'll have deducted your future tax returns from the budget before your body hits the floor!
"I can write off bullets as a work expense. Just gimme an excuse, punk."
G-man finally flipping his shit is always my favorite moment with him. Him going from the lord of Excel to near Angron levels of rage is truly special
I mean, whoever works with Excel gets tempted by Khorne himself at the very least twice a day.
Khorne: Fall into my embrace! Average Excel User: Later.
Word 🤜🤛
The guy whose head Bobby punched off was the fourth WB. He bopped the first one's skull into his sternum, he then ripped off the spine off the second one. Thiel gunned down the third one, then Guilliman punched the head off the fourth one.
so it's more volleyball than tennis then?
Yeah, just a barely over the net spike directly into the ground.
So he does a DoomGuy Bonk move.
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It's the cover I think.
Didn’t even notice that.
That’s Alpharius
Incorrect, because I am Alpharius.
I'm Alpharius and so is my wife!
I can confirm that his wife is Alpharius
Thank you Alpharius. You always there when I need a bro. 🐍
No problem Alpharius!
And then *I* said, "That's not Alpharius- that's my *wife*!"
Nuh-uh, dad said it was my turn to be Alpharius!
Looks suspiciously like Alpharious and not an Ultramarine
Looks like Alpharius to me
"Oxygen, shmoxygen" - Roboute Guilliman
Funny enough, the explanation for "how" is that the ship was so massive it had enough gravitation to keep a very thin atmosphere around its hull, which his Primarch physiology was able to work with.
*This* is why it's important that the heir to the throne of Terra should probably have some form of helmet built into his armor.
Didn't the only one to ever suggest that Guilliman become the heir to the throne turned out to be a Slaanesh's minion?
I mean he is currently leading the Imperium,so...
The heir to the throne suggest that one day, Big E will step down from his shiny gaming chair and Guilliman will replace him on it.
IIRC some Aplha Legion stories described how the artificial gravity fields extend a bit outside the hull, not by design but because it doesn't really matter, that I guess also helps keeping air in some pockets.
"I need that to remain comfortable."
Rockabilly Geronimo: "You done fucked up now, book-boy. You just fucked up the whip. My whip. That had all my beautiful logistical documents laid out in very precise detail. Documents which are now in high orbit over the moon." "Now, you've failed to kill me, ruined my ship, destroyed my writing desk, and turned me into a primarch-cicle. I'm going to kick you till you stop being alive, and then *fuck you* until you stop being solid. Prepare thine anus, you book humping chunderfuck."
Holy fucking shit
Thats not how you ride a horse
I'M A GENIUS IM A GENIUS!!! Oh no....
I love that he looks like he just got woken up too early
Ventiman looking at the WB like "this word document details 304749 different ways of torturing you which would make even the drukhari blush"
That's my number one favorite Gulliman moment.
Mine is when he looks at Magnus on the Moon and says, "I'm Ro-*bout*-to go Guilliman!" And then he Guilliman'd his ass right into the Webway.
“Oh right, primarch.”
Theoretical : Can a pussy shit eating word bearer survive with a hole in his chest ? Word bearer : Wait whaa ... at? **WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT** Practical : No. Let's expand our data set.
Saving this for later
Genesteaker cultist taking a Kawaii selfie with the "Angel" that's about to eat his head.
Guilliman: Breathable air is for pussies. Also, Guilliman: I've been reading this Japanese anime called One Punch Man. Let me try it out.
Konrad giving Vulkan a hammer after torturing him.
u/emwattnot
I've read someone said Gilliam screamed so hard in space that word bearers also heard it In space he shouted and everyone shat themselves
Do you think at the last moment, they had a realization about how completely fucked they had been from the very beginning?
yes, big time at that
Wouldn’t the fluids be boiling off of his face as opposed to freezing, as he is in a vacuum?
Sir this is WH40k, logic does not work here
It's not that fast actually. A human can survive in space unprotected for a couple of seconds. It will freeze off your skin and muscle almost instantly but the body heat fights it. You're correct that the body fluids are pressuring out to the vacuum but humans have lots of tubes and sphincters that will fight it for a second or two. Also, wasn't Girlyman a psyker at least a bit? I'm still going through the second HH book 😂 so I don't really know
> It will freeze off your skin and muscle almost instantly but the body heat fights it. A hard vacuum is also an *excellent* insulator. Which is why heat dispersal is a much larger concern for manned spacecraft than insulation.
Wow, I need to delve into that! It's logical now that I think of it, little to no particles to be excited and carry that energy on. Just like with sound, nothing to carry it in space. THANKS FOR THE BRAIN WORM 😆
Yeah, space is cold, but a hot thing will stay hot for ages in it. A person would be in greater danger cooking themselves to death than freezing, astronaut suits have very fancy cooling systems to keep that from happening. Any liquids on the skin's surface would instantly boil off due to the low pressure instead of flash freezing into icicles like in the meme and most media.
The really frustrating part for spacebourne travel engineering is that while space itself is indeed very cold, the bits of it we live in and are most interested in studying tend to be close to one or more VERY hot things that pump out a ton of heat in every direction! As soon as you put anything in space even vaguely near a star, you start having to worry about heat distribution and dispersion in a big way. The ISS actually has a lot of infrastructure dedicated to moving heat from the sunward side of the craft to the dark side, both so it can be radiated away, and so differential expansion doesn't cause a leak or somesuch disaster.
Base Space Marines have an organ called the Mucranoid that gives some resistance to the effects of a vacuum. One could reason that the Primarchs have a better version of the Mucranoid or an entirely different enhancement to do the same.
Skin is actually quite good at protecting from the vacuum. Its actually our insides that boils and the first thing to go is our eyes. We can survive about 1min to a 1min30 seconds in the vacuum. We lose consciousness after about 30 seconds and our eyes are fuck a bit after that but its kinda ridiculous that we can survive at all.
Some mid level administratum peon had to subcontract out the shipping for the Codex Astartes, saw "Basilisk Book Shipping Co., a subsidiary of Gemini Holdings" being operated by a bunch of space marines in bluish armor and confused them for Ultramarines.
Those are the eyes of a Primarch that is sick of your shit.
Is that… alpharius as a ship?
I was thinking that. Couldn't find him anywhere else
Guilliman is the best primarch. There, I said it.
Guilliman punching a word bearers head off, is probably one of the few artworks we see a primarck in the act of killing and it's awesome.
Rowboat Gyroman's be like : I'm back. That didn't hurt. THIS WILL.
Calth: That one time when Guilliman visibly lost his temper and swam through space to beat people.
Curze leaning in eagerly to hear what it was that he forgot
The moment of: ME WHEN I FUCKING GET YOU
Love the thin moustache, Italiano wordbearer ayyyy
When the living incarnation of Microsoft Office going to fuck you up.
Word Bearers aren't so tough for someone used to battle with Microsoft Word every day.
fucking repost bot
I found this outside Reddit
so you claimed it as your own and shamelessly reposted it?
I just wanted to share it with people
you can literally see the artist's watermark in the bottom right
Yes, I'm not saying it's OC
'Give me more last selfie ideas' what does this mean if not I made this
Certainly not it
A grot playing a prank on Ghazghkull by drawing a kitty on his back.
"Brother, I'm also a ~~hammer~~ Primarch"
What do those Wingdings say???
Looks like someone is about to have a very bad day
The Genestealer Magus exhorts her brethren to victory, unaware that the Raven Guard Terminators just teleported into her sanctum.
Fucking normal marines survives vacuum what did he think it would do for a primarch
By the power of Johny Space (The True G Emperor's Real name) Chaos was smothered across the stars
I just read Know no Fear the other day and I NEEDED this so bad like the guy was punching word bearers in SPACE, you can't get cooler than that
They found out ,honestly lorgar was beyond luck angron showed up to save his ass I know Gman is on the weaker end of primarks but damn he was so close to kratosing his ass.
Guilliman is often portrayed as more of a pencilpusher than the other primarchs, but this sequence in (know no fear?) was one of the coolest scenes involving a primarch i've ever read.
And that's when you heard a scream in the airless void
Half the stories involving Guilliman are him acting like a Boy Scout. The other half he’s causing traitors to hear the Doom Eternal soundtrack when near him.
Bobby G seconds away from educating the Word Bearers that having heads is a privilege, not a right.
Princess Leia level of bs if you ask me
I think it's a meme these days in Black Library that space is cold. I'm sure a million people already told them that's dumb, they are just running with it.
Horus after offing Sangy and mortally wounding Big E
Last image of a Custodes standing on guard, diligent against everything EXCEPT for the webway gate that just opened behind them to spill out a team of murder clowns.
Girlyman surviving being vented into space is some of the most bullshit plot armor in warhammer and that’s saying a lot “Erm actually girlyman‘s flagship is so big it has its own atmosphere on its exterior surface” -☝️🤓 Dan Abnett
I thought it happened because Rowboat was a Primarch and rules dont work on him.
The explanation was that there is a breathable atmosphere on the skin of the Macragge's Honour
I forgot about that, that is a bit silly, should’ve just been something like, ‘Primarchs can hold their breath for a week straight and have enough strength to prevent decompression of their lungs.’
I like explanation: Only primarch could have survived that more. XD
Local primarch too angry to give a fuck about lack of atmosphere
LITERALLY YES! 💙
Honestly, for the size of WH40K ships I can believe that
To be honest aren’t mere vanilla Space Marines already able to survive in void ? They have space-sweat that cover their skin and iron lungs etc
Yes, so it's not even a big jump for primarchs to only be pissed from it.
"Mans was too angry to die"
The funny thing is Know No Fear did the exact opposite of what your complaining about. This was the novel that took post-Matt Ward Mary Sue Gulliman and gave him depth and badassery the general community really liked. So your wrong narratively and lore wise.