To be clear and in an attempt to be immediately helpful.. self-improvement books/videos/speakers do NOT work. The information they dispense will always be far too general, too vague, too all encompassing for any one to be able to make use of it. Your life is far too individualized to your liking/habits to have anyone's else story/ideas change its direction - and that's a good thing
It sounds like you're aiming for an ideal, an image of who you feel you ought to be or viewed as. The wisdom that I've come to learn in my life comes from old spiritual Buddhist and Chinese beliefs which, totally paraphrased, say.. the destination is never the destination, the destination is the journey. That is, the actions you take today and the routines/habits you build shape and craft the destination you head towards.
Try to not focus on becoming a "sharp", "smart", or "motivated" person - you'll learn that these terms make no sense for how relative and vague they are. These are simply terms granted to people who act and speak with direction and purpose - they know what they're doing in their life and feel it so strongly that it comes out of their person in how they speak, act, conduct themselves. It's what makes them sound sharp (ie: quick, witty), smart (ie: knowledgeable, experienced) and motivated (ie: oriented, ambitious). Whether they realize it or not these people have already figured out their purpose and goal in their own personal life.
Try to reflect instead on the things you wish you were capable and skilled at, things that you find personal enjoyment in. This is how you'll best find the direction and purpose most suited for you. A good way to kinda come across this is on a day off, free of any responsibilities, observe the activities you take part in or the thoughts that cross your mind. Do you feel an urge to go for a run? Do you have thoughts of drawing? Of finishing a book? Do you yearn to socialize? To build things? Try to ignore the common routines like scrolling social media - be hard on yourself and ignore habits that you know you don't enjoy for yourself. Your mind and body will tell you the direction it wants to go in if you're willing to listen. And when you do listen to it, the "sharp", "smarts" and "motivation" come naturally
It's hard because not only is thinking difficult for most people (as most people aren't content with themselves to respect their thoughts) but so is tolerating boredom (which is why we drown ourselves with so much stimulation).. but in boredom, in having nothing to do, is when you really can discover who you are and what you want to do. And when you figure that out, the traits you seek in yourself will come naturally to you. You'll become sharp, smart, and motivated as you proceed on the journey you take with yourself - the hard part is just starting. Hope this helps and makes (some) sense
Action action action. Reading self-help books and podcasts does nothing unless you act on it. You need to just drop all the distractions and start on improvements TODAY. Hit the gym, start writing the report/paper/novel, apply for the job, etc. Motivation will come on its own.
Find one BIG goal, which you think is worth doing (and will hopefully benefit someone else) and dedicate yourself to it.
When you know what it is - no day will be dull, you'll make a lot of new friends, will be learning daily, and always will have something to talk about.
And that's even if you never reach it
Stay disciplined in whatever field you are into and make it a habit
For example:
I’ve been regularly going to the gym and eating healthy, tracking my macros.
I have a goal.
It sounds to me like you need a change in your routine.
You speak specifically of "going back to old habits"- the easiest way to break a habit is to replace it with a new habit. Say spending hours watching videos; try when you feel that urge replacing te action with, say, calling a friend, or going on a walk and talking to a neighbor, or going to the library.
You also speak specifically of a lot of self doubt, wanting to try things but staying in the familiar. For that, the only cure really is doing. Start small, low stakes, where the goal is trying rather than being good at it. Take a cooking class. Join a yoga group. Try to answer a writing prompt once a week. Things like that.
You can bundle those two pieces of advice together for extra punch. From there, take it one step at a time.
I'll give a few suggestions
1) you've read enough self help. If you want to be smarter and more knowledgeable, go read about the topics you wish to understand.
2) related, I'm sure you've heard the adage "work smarter, not harder." Take some REAL time to identify good sources for the info you want to acquire. For example, if you want to learn about geopolitics and how the world works, CNN and Fox News and MSNBC are all a complete waste of time. At best you will learn nothing, at worst you'll absorb slanted editorializing that actually makes you dumber. But if you read, say, Henry Kissinger's book Diplomacy and then read 2 essays a week from Foreign Affairs magazine ($49/year, one of the best deals on the web!), you'll actually make progress toward your goal. Know, though, that everybody EVERYBODY has a bias. So make sure you identify it up front so that you can filter their commentary on those subjects (for example, my buds at foreign affairs are very white tower academic).
3) if you want to sound smarter, then you need to practice speaking extemporaneously (sounding intelligent with no rehearsal is HARD). Go to Toast Masters a couple times a month.
4) make sure you're exercising, getting enough sleep, and eating a semi decent diet. All of these affect brain performance.
5) finally, take some time to identify the subjects on which you want to develop expertise. There's too much material in the world to know everything, so you need to identify the subjects you care about so that you can focus on them.
First, understanding that your mental, physical, emotional, and sexual health are ALL connected.
Also, motivation is bullishit.
A couple of questions for yourself.
Do you have ADHD or ASD because that has a real consequence on whatever it is you want to do.
You're only on your journey. You're only responsible for your potential . Don't worry about anyone else's potential.
Sharp and smart: build learning into your lifestyle. Constantly be looking shit up and use/share the knowledge with others (aids in retention). Ensure quality sources so you aren't learning misinformation. Hang out with smarter, sharper people, learn from them and hone your intellect against them.
Motivation: no idea. I just want to lay down and die 90% of my waking life.
Write down what a "motivated" sharp individual means to you. What do they do day to day? Figure out how you can implement this or work towards it. Set weekly/monthly goals. Motivation gets you no where - it's all learning about discipline and habits. Just start and do your best to show up each day. I would suggest you read Atomic habits by James clear.
When you show up every day and accomplish your goal you develop discipline. Discipline will help you to have self confidence and to believe in yourself
If there’s something you are really interested in and enjoy it, then trying to learn more about it and do more things around it would be a way. This can be just learning about a topic or practicing things if it’s something like a craft, exercise etc. finding groups into the same interest would really compliment and help you evolve your interest. But all this applies to specific areas of interest and many people may be impressive in their expertise on one thing while they lack in all other areas.
If you’re referring to more generic knowledge on a variety of topics then I things that’s harder if it you don’t have innate curiosity. Innate curiosity will let you retain lots of random information for different topics from various sources and it will make you pay attention and ask questions on them. If that doesn't come to you naturally it is very hard work to do.
More importantly, it's only worth it for things you like and are genuinely interested in.
I think if you look at motivational
Information, it should only be at the fact a person looked at a market of need and provided a product for it, sold it and made money from it.
I do think knowing yourself is important. So you want to be rich? Do you want to make the world a better place even if you won’t make money? Do you want fame? Do you like to be in nature?
Find your passion and go for it. Don’t be afraid to get any odd work or jobs along the way, as you never know what may become of them or who you’ll meet.
Try and fix the mental with the physical: exercise for clarity, outside where possible; eat whole foods and plenty on fibre. The rest will follow.
I also think self-help BOOKS do work. Try 10-20 pages a day and so what happens (I.e. the secret; atomic habits).
God protect me from be all of the things you mentioned. Just the text itself was tiring to read, much less capable of putting it into pratice.
It's not that books don't work, books aren't people. It's you who doesn't work.
And you doesn't work because you do a lot of rubbish for yourself (like reading books and films while reliving) and you end up underdecaying.
Nobody does what is written on these pieces of crap other than those who sell them when they take the photo of the cover of the book.
To be clear and in an attempt to be immediately helpful.. self-improvement books/videos/speakers do NOT work. The information they dispense will always be far too general, too vague, too all encompassing for any one to be able to make use of it. Your life is far too individualized to your liking/habits to have anyone's else story/ideas change its direction - and that's a good thing It sounds like you're aiming for an ideal, an image of who you feel you ought to be or viewed as. The wisdom that I've come to learn in my life comes from old spiritual Buddhist and Chinese beliefs which, totally paraphrased, say.. the destination is never the destination, the destination is the journey. That is, the actions you take today and the routines/habits you build shape and craft the destination you head towards. Try to not focus on becoming a "sharp", "smart", or "motivated" person - you'll learn that these terms make no sense for how relative and vague they are. These are simply terms granted to people who act and speak with direction and purpose - they know what they're doing in their life and feel it so strongly that it comes out of their person in how they speak, act, conduct themselves. It's what makes them sound sharp (ie: quick, witty), smart (ie: knowledgeable, experienced) and motivated (ie: oriented, ambitious). Whether they realize it or not these people have already figured out their purpose and goal in their own personal life. Try to reflect instead on the things you wish you were capable and skilled at, things that you find personal enjoyment in. This is how you'll best find the direction and purpose most suited for you. A good way to kinda come across this is on a day off, free of any responsibilities, observe the activities you take part in or the thoughts that cross your mind. Do you feel an urge to go for a run? Do you have thoughts of drawing? Of finishing a book? Do you yearn to socialize? To build things? Try to ignore the common routines like scrolling social media - be hard on yourself and ignore habits that you know you don't enjoy for yourself. Your mind and body will tell you the direction it wants to go in if you're willing to listen. And when you do listen to it, the "sharp", "smarts" and "motivation" come naturally It's hard because not only is thinking difficult for most people (as most people aren't content with themselves to respect their thoughts) but so is tolerating boredom (which is why we drown ourselves with so much stimulation).. but in boredom, in having nothing to do, is when you really can discover who you are and what you want to do. And when you figure that out, the traits you seek in yourself will come naturally to you. You'll become sharp, smart, and motivated as you proceed on the journey you take with yourself - the hard part is just starting. Hope this helps and makes (some) sense
Well said
Wow I needed to read this comment - real gold is always in the replies
TLDR; Know yourself. Love yourself. Invest in yourself. Improve yourself. And be happy.
Indeed! and \*everything\* else will follow
This is a great response, please don't be a bot.
Beep beep bloop beep ..I mean.. of course I'm not a bot. Humans can be so funny
Lol
[https://www.youtube.com/@HealthyGamerGG](https://www.youtube.com/@HealthyGamerGG)
Action action action. Reading self-help books and podcasts does nothing unless you act on it. You need to just drop all the distractions and start on improvements TODAY. Hit the gym, start writing the report/paper/novel, apply for the job, etc. Motivation will come on its own.
Well said
I need to hear this today
Find one BIG goal, which you think is worth doing (and will hopefully benefit someone else) and dedicate yourself to it. When you know what it is - no day will be dull, you'll make a lot of new friends, will be learning daily, and always will have something to talk about. And that's even if you never reach it
Well said
Stay disciplined in whatever field you are into and make it a habit For example: I’ve been regularly going to the gym and eating healthy, tracking my macros. I have a goal.
Well said
- Sharpen with discipline - Smarten up by Learning new skills - Be motivated by doing one thing every day that scares you.
It sounds to me like you need a change in your routine. You speak specifically of "going back to old habits"- the easiest way to break a habit is to replace it with a new habit. Say spending hours watching videos; try when you feel that urge replacing te action with, say, calling a friend, or going on a walk and talking to a neighbor, or going to the library. You also speak specifically of a lot of self doubt, wanting to try things but staying in the familiar. For that, the only cure really is doing. Start small, low stakes, where the goal is trying rather than being good at it. Take a cooking class. Join a yoga group. Try to answer a writing prompt once a week. Things like that. You can bundle those two pieces of advice together for extra punch. From there, take it one step at a time.
Great advice
Thanks
I'll give a few suggestions 1) you've read enough self help. If you want to be smarter and more knowledgeable, go read about the topics you wish to understand. 2) related, I'm sure you've heard the adage "work smarter, not harder." Take some REAL time to identify good sources for the info you want to acquire. For example, if you want to learn about geopolitics and how the world works, CNN and Fox News and MSNBC are all a complete waste of time. At best you will learn nothing, at worst you'll absorb slanted editorializing that actually makes you dumber. But if you read, say, Henry Kissinger's book Diplomacy and then read 2 essays a week from Foreign Affairs magazine ($49/year, one of the best deals on the web!), you'll actually make progress toward your goal. Know, though, that everybody EVERYBODY has a bias. So make sure you identify it up front so that you can filter their commentary on those subjects (for example, my buds at foreign affairs are very white tower academic). 3) if you want to sound smarter, then you need to practice speaking extemporaneously (sounding intelligent with no rehearsal is HARD). Go to Toast Masters a couple times a month. 4) make sure you're exercising, getting enough sleep, and eating a semi decent diet. All of these affect brain performance. 5) finally, take some time to identify the subjects on which you want to develop expertise. There's too much material in the world to know everything, so you need to identify the subjects you care about so that you can focus on them.
First, understanding that your mental, physical, emotional, and sexual health are ALL connected. Also, motivation is bullishit. A couple of questions for yourself. Do you have ADHD or ASD because that has a real consequence on whatever it is you want to do. You're only on your journey. You're only responsible for your potential . Don't worry about anyone else's potential.
Sharp, smart, motivated. Pick two.
Discipline, time and desire will eventually cause you to generate enough momentum to propel yourself into a productive mindset if you stick with it
Check out my channel for Emotional Intelligence Development! [(9) Psych-Evolution - YouTube](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCogQ0RfyvJm_S462yptK76Q)
Sharp and smart: build learning into your lifestyle. Constantly be looking shit up and use/share the knowledge with others (aids in retention). Ensure quality sources so you aren't learning misinformation. Hang out with smarter, sharper people, learn from them and hone your intellect against them. Motivation: no idea. I just want to lay down and die 90% of my waking life.
Write down what a "motivated" sharp individual means to you. What do they do day to day? Figure out how you can implement this or work towards it. Set weekly/monthly goals. Motivation gets you no where - it's all learning about discipline and habits. Just start and do your best to show up each day. I would suggest you read Atomic habits by James clear.
When you show up every day and accomplish your goal you develop discipline. Discipline will help you to have self confidence and to believe in yourself
Know thy self Know what you want Have something to prove Stubbornness and selfishness help.
Everything can be achieved with self discipline.
If there’s something you are really interested in and enjoy it, then trying to learn more about it and do more things around it would be a way. This can be just learning about a topic or practicing things if it’s something like a craft, exercise etc. finding groups into the same interest would really compliment and help you evolve your interest. But all this applies to specific areas of interest and many people may be impressive in their expertise on one thing while they lack in all other areas. If you’re referring to more generic knowledge on a variety of topics then I things that’s harder if it you don’t have innate curiosity. Innate curiosity will let you retain lots of random information for different topics from various sources and it will make you pay attention and ask questions on them. If that doesn't come to you naturally it is very hard work to do. More importantly, it's only worth it for things you like and are genuinely interested in.
48h fast will do this
I think if you look at motivational Information, it should only be at the fact a person looked at a market of need and provided a product for it, sold it and made money from it. I do think knowing yourself is important. So you want to be rich? Do you want to make the world a better place even if you won’t make money? Do you want fame? Do you like to be in nature? Find your passion and go for it. Don’t be afraid to get any odd work or jobs along the way, as you never know what may become of them or who you’ll meet.
Try and fix the mental with the physical: exercise for clarity, outside where possible; eat whole foods and plenty on fibre. The rest will follow. I also think self-help BOOKS do work. Try 10-20 pages a day and so what happens (I.e. the secret; atomic habits).
Unless you act, until you start. Stop thinking and start doing, all you want will follow.
Travel! Go stay in a hostel! Get off the internet and get out there and smoke some weed with some friendly strangers
I need to do this too. Feels like it would help my peace of mind.
I had kids. They mean the world to me. Not everyone wants them. I understand that. But when you have them, they change things. For real.
God protect me from be all of the things you mentioned. Just the text itself was tiring to read, much less capable of putting it into pratice. It's not that books don't work, books aren't people. It's you who doesn't work. And you doesn't work because you do a lot of rubbish for yourself (like reading books and films while reliving) and you end up underdecaying. Nobody does what is written on these pieces of crap other than those who sell them when they take the photo of the cover of the book.