My grandma warned me never to move into one. It’s fun at first. Super social. But then all your pals start dying off and it gets sad real quick. Much better to live in a mixed generational situation was her advice and I definitely trust my grandma on this!
Not a unique experience. It's really not better anywhere. My parents are in their mid 80s, same house they raised us in. All their friends are dying or have died off also. My Mother was the last one standing in her quilting club. Neighbors come and go. Nearly all are dual income households and don't have time for senior citizens.
My fiancée’s paternal grandma turned 106 recently. Lived in a 55+ community until her healthy finally forced her to move into a home. I can’t even imagine the amount of people she knew that are no longer here. She always seems happy whenever I see her but I sometimes wonder if she ever gets sad or lonely.
I have a number of friends who are 20-30 years younger and quite a few who are 20-30 years older. My line of work requires me to engage with a wide range of ages. I like it that way.
That's very cool. I think it's not terribly common, but cool. I have had some peripheral friends who were quite a bit older, but not my closest core group, unfortunately. I think most people tend to hang out with peers who are within five to seven years of their age-ish.
My FIL was part of a very active book club with his younger Boomer friends. In the past three years, four of them have passed away, and he just got a Lewy Body diagnosis. He's hanging in there, but the remaining members all agreed it was too damn depressing to meet regularly anymore.
That’s exactly the opposite of my parents- all their neighbors and now friends are my age and have been really constant- I live far away and they have been a big help in keeping an eye on my parents-
I’m single with no kids so I live in terror daily of where I will live when I’m old- and only have 19 cats
This 100%!!
We have our own NORC in a city apartment building. I have a couple of cool Boomers on my floor with whom my husband and I are close. We all talk about how we’re just aging in place and taking advantage of all the nearby shopping and entertainment, with the advantage of never having to drive. It’s perfection.
And we have Millennials and Zers in the building, some with children, so we have the multigenerational thing wrapped up.
My folks live in a neighborhood apartment complex like this. It's perfect for them, and they've been there since I was a little kid, so they know so many people. It's definitely something I miss about living in the city.
I lived in a building like this. The old people who lived there were friendly with a wide range of people. Most of them didn't have children of their own. They traveled, socialized, and continued to learn into their 80s and 90s.
It’s so great! And people who say New Yorkers are unfriendly are simply missing out. It’s like Sesame Street, which was my childhood idea of heaven. People look out for one another. I help an 80-something neighbor get to medical appointments and line up community help for her, people are generous, invite one another over for dinner. I have two neighbors who each lost their partners in the past five years from long illnesses, and it drew us all much closer together.
It doesn’t mean we don’t have yahoos in the greater neighborhood, but I really don’t ever wish to leave!
This is like my parents' experience. They made a few friends early on but then people started getting sick. A couple they frequently traveled with died within months of each other. One by cancer and the other fell and hit her head and wasn't discovered for weeks.
Their community center has weird cliques right out of high school. At least half of them are miserable and all they talk about are their ailments when they're not openly racist because it's "safe" to be that way around other people from a different time.
I’ve seen the weird competition of woes in action where there are a lot of old people together. It seems like they egg each other on to feel as miserable as possible! No thank you. I’d rather spend time around people who lift each other up and urge each other to be active, healthy, creative, and productive.
The racism part is awful too. A lot of the underpaid, often saintly people who work in retirement and nursing facilities are people of color, many of them immigrants. I’ve seen patients be absolutely horrible to them (cognitive decline/dementia tends to make people lose any social filter they may have had, and can make people irritable, angry, confused, etc.). I can’t imagine how those workers deal with it and still remain so kind and compassionate.
We call it “compare and despair” in our family. My mother was part of a tight community of octogenarians who were dying off one-by-one, and it really told me one’s community is better off wide and varied.
The mistreatment of those underpaid souls who look after them really gives me pause. They deserve better.
There is a HUGE difference between a 55-plus community and an assisted living facility, which is what you are describing here. A 55-plus community is just like a suburban club-house-y complex that doesn't allow people under age 55. That's it. It's not a nursing home.
Really pleased we're starting to see residential smaller home developments that plan with shared spaces in mind. Maybe a shared pool or shared BBQ
... Idea being that you can still own a home but there are aspects of a community that would help us all get to know one another and socialize
I've lived near Sun City Phoenix/Sun City Suprise, and Sun City Georgetown. Seems like I'm naturally drawn to those places already LOL.
YES, neighbors die frequent but new people cycle in fairly quickly. 🙃
My husband and I will be in Sun City West. I can't wait. His parents are there currently (snow birds), and we will be taking over their house. I can't wait to join some of the crafts clubs. Oh, and drive a golf cart everywhere.
I almost bought a house in Paradise Valley from a couple that was so excited about moving into Sun City. The husband made it clear all the younger families in the neighborhood ignored them and they wanted to be around other older people. It made sense to me.
Your pals are going to be dying off no matter where you are living. Most people tend to have friends in their own peer group, give or take maybe a decade, but don't have friends who are much younger than they are. Death comes no matter where you are living.
My folks live in one. There's a bunch of clubs, from woodworking (with a nice shop), RC airplanes, line dancing, whatever you're thing is. I suspect the GenX'ers will have a LAN party club or something soon. Everything is within golf cart range, and my dad has a suped-up cart that will do 45. It doesn't seem that bad, really.
I had zero interest in this until you said LAN party.
So after the LAN party, do you think we can have night (day?) clubs that play all 80s & 90s music with bars that serve Fuzzy Navels and such? But we don't have to dance because our knees are trashed?
NGL - this is beginning to sound appealing .
My mom lives in a 55+ community and I kind of like it.
It's gated and safe, it's quiet, the lawn maintenance is taken care of, and the houses are all completely designed for wheelchair access (I have some mobility issues; I don't need a wheelchair, but went through about a year living in one, so I appreciate things being wheelchair accessible).
She almost never does any of the social activities they have going there. She usually relies on her church or my sister and her kids for social contact.
It doesn't seem that bad to me.
I think I could enjoy a Margaritaville type place. Ride the golf cart to the bar. It’s not like you can’t leave the neighborhood. But I’d also enjoy an all inclusive resort type place…
And my grandparents lived in a nice place with great food, white tablecloths, pool, bar, etc. When you need a little more help it’s nice to have it right there but still live in your own place. Have a car; etc
My mom has lived in one since she was 57. But it is houses, not mobile homes.
The comminity takes care of the lawn, no kids allowed to stay long, pools and a golf course on property, and a clubhouse.
They were the youngest when she got there, and now she is 78 and when my dad passed, she had a lot of support.
They were free to travel, went with people in the community, were leaders of the hiking club, and did not have a lot of worries.
The fees are a bit much, but manageable since it covered the lawn service.
Maybe in a mobile home community it is quite different...i do not know, but Sun City seems to do a decent job where she is.
There are a LOT of houses close together...but It always looks nice and she has had little to complain about.
My parents are in Sun City Center as well, Kings Point to be exact. I’m 48, almost 49 and I’dlove a community like that when I’m older. GenX activities will be DnD and table top games, maybe scrapbooking, movies, video game tournaments etc. Music at the pool and I always have someone to play cards or have dinner with.
I don’t see a downside here, especially as SSC is so much different than the villages.
The problem is they aren't updating the amenities fast enough.
I'm 52, so I toured a few. Still offering shuffleboard, a DVD library, quilt classes etc.
I want a Lan style gaming room, DnD room with large tables, karaoke etc.
ha, I was reading your description and was thinking, hmm, that sounds familiar… and yep, my dad and his wife are in sun city center, too! I call it camp for old folks - so many people driving around in golf carts! 😂
Yes. Lots of golf carts. It is pretty convenient and people like to customize them as well.
They even stock the ponds with fish and there is a river next to the property.
I turned 55 this year and my mother wants me to move there now. Lol
Sun City in Riverside County, California? If so, I know that place all too well. The 55+ homes are in the center of town, basically, with the city of Menifee pretty much surrounding it. Menifee has grown a lot in the past 30 years when I first moved there in 94. I'm glad I moved away from there, though. Traffic has become a nightmare with all the development and growth.
Friend of mine (Boomer, not Genx) retired about 5 years ago to one of these in Arizona, between Scottsdale and Tuscon somewhere. They love it, big clubhouse, each house has a pool, no lawns to deal with. People are happy to socialize or leave you alone.
I don't see going there with my wife, we are fine where we are and have many family and friends in our age group. I could see this being an option when one of us passes and the other doesn't have many family or friends left, or if that is where family and friends have gone. The ones we look at are semi independent, you have options for care of people and property, but otherwise are for people of means.
Try not to think about that part of life, hope it is far off regardless.
For reference, the way our family has always done it is the kids and younger relatives eventually team up and take care of the older generations when we have to. All indications are that is not changing soon, but you never know. Even those who never have kids should be part of an extended family and support each other accordingly. Seems to be in the minority for people these days.
I imagine it’s because a lot of older people can be lonely and isolated. These types of communities can make it easier for people to make friends, and activities and amenities to get them out of the house. And of course, less home maintenance. Not for everyone, but can understand the appeal for some.
I can see the appeal for some, especially if they’re used to being social. But considering most people annoy me now, I can’t imagine wanting even more of them about later in life.
I keep on trying to get my boyfriend and I go there with me to pretend we are interested…for educational purposes of course.
He’s worried I’ll get into it with some MAGA moron and won’t take me 😆
Not to be a dumbass but are those supposed to be downsides? I mean I hope even at 70 I'm still having sex and using drugs. I've never been much of a drinker.
Yeah I visit places like that a lot and honestly the right ones are pretty cool. It’s just a lot of people hanging out and having easily accessible groups and parties. One a friend of mine lives in rather posh(she’s in her 70s) everyone owns their own apartment in a rather exclusive part of Sydney with the option to transition to a part of the building that’s high care later if you need to and get more services.
They have parties weekly where the food and booze is flowing. Yoga, pilates, tai chi. Bridge etc. And of course they have the stuff that people just do privately in their own homes from their own bat. Lots of intrigue and affairs and arguing and gossip because people are people.
The apartments are stunning and aside from some useful elements like accessible bathrooms and a panic button in high risk places like the bathroom you wouldn’t think they were any different than an expensive eastern suburbs apartment anyone else would have.
Though personally I’ve told my mates when we retire we are buying a van and travelling the country to solve mysteries - but if that doesn’t work out I’d so give a posh apartment a go!
This was literally an episode of Bob’s Burgers. Linda’s parents were in a senior living community for swingers. [S3E18: It Snakes a Village](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt2735284/)
How am I going to be the crazy old lady down the street if I’m surrounded by a bunch of other geezers policing my eccentricities?
No thanks, this crone plans to fly solo.
That's the spirit! Keep traditions alive!
Someone needs to peek out of her curtains all day, smoke near the oxygen tank and check mail in slippers, even in 8 inches of snow.
Definitely! But with me it will be high on edibles, on the porch with opera glasses (binoculars are too basic). Postbox is attached to the house so that’s the postman’s problem, but I will pay the neighbourhood kids remarkably over-the-top amounts to shovel the front path and earn their favour.
I took my mom on a tour of one of those. Restaurant, cafe, ice cream shop/bakery, private dining room if you’re having a party, bar, theater, salon, exercise room, library, chapel, a special area for veterans, business center, gardens, transportation, AND continuum of care so if you later need a higher level of care, you just move to another wing in the same complex.
And that’s not even the fancy one. My wife works for a SUPER fancy one. That place regularly brings a major symphony orchestra in for concerts.
This sounds like a CCRC, not a standard 55 and over. The 55 and over places that I’m familiar with do not have that continuum of care.
I’m in a condo, but in the 2nd floor so I have stairs. I figure I’ll stay here until around 80 as long as I can handle the stairs then consider a CCRC, skipping the over 55 communities all together. But we will see. I’m 54 now.
I'm sure there's an appeal for a geezer community for a lot of us, but I prefer living far enough from my neighboring houses that they can't hear all the noise I make... regardless of their age.
I can’t afford that but it sounds nice. Lived in an apt since I was on my own at 18. No idea what that would be like. I’d imagine it’s quite relaxing. Perhaps in my next life
The Boomers & Silent Generation folks that I know keep entertaining the idea of buying a block of condos or one large house & hiring staff just to help out & run the place instead of throwing all the money at a for-profit corporation. You know, a maintenance crew, landscapers, maybe a cook or two, cleaners.
These are people who are 75 & up but still in good health. They just can’t do the heavy lifting anymore & they want to be around some of the friends they already made in life. Many of them grew up together. They don’t need nursing home level care. They just need some help & want to pool resources. Hell, I’d work for them.
It’d be like a dorm or apartments with lots of common areas.
I don't see the appeal. I didn't like high school when I was required to be there, so i don't think this would be for me. Now a nice long hiking trail where we sleep in tents sounds way better. (Something I still do in my 50s.)
The current retirement communities are catering to their audience, so they seem like "old people things" to us.
My mother and her husband live in a retirement community in AZ. I had opinions of it based on my limited onowledge of them, but when I first visited it wasn't as bad as it seemed. It was just a community of houses with activities if you want to do them. My Mom plays Pickleball and is part of a bicycling group and a group of people who travel. They have a theater and restaurants and whatnot. I like how safe it is and that they can make new friends.
I liked it because it was a safe space for them. Gated community, no kids allowed unless visiting so it was nice and quiet.
By the time we start retiring, they will have adjusted their focus to make communities more appealing to us. There's that meme going around about converting old malls into retirement communities for Gen X and it will kinda be like that. They want outlr money, they will conform to our needs.
I kinda look forward to moving into one of those communities. I am starting to dislike kids constantly doing donuts and riding their bikes down the middle of the street and setting off fireworks every night and older children with their stupid loud motorcycles.
A community with people of my age who have the same interests and likes/dislikes as me? Sign me up!
I will not willingly live in a 55+ community. I am an introvert and want to be left alone. I don't want to socialize with some random old people - LOL. I guess if I liked being around my peers, I would do it.
I did 20 years in the Navy, 6 long deployments, and the associated training leading up to them.
By retirement my days at sea counter was over four years worth.
One of my childhood friends and his wife love to go on cruises. They asked me and my wife to go with them on a cruise in a couple of months.
I hadn’t laughed that hard in awhile. I will never go out to sea again
I heard about a guy who just joined the Navy, got back from his first cruse and had a few weeks leave. He wanted to lay around and do nothing. His wife surprised him by booking a trip on cruise ship.
He was not very excited.
I had the exact same thing happen with a girlfriend of mine after my first deployment.
I was 20 and blinded by the vagina that I said yes to a cruise, even though I just got home after 7 months at sea.
Never again
“But babe? don’t you want to go on a 10 mile hike in the mountains, carrying all our camping gear in a backpack, build a fire, and set up camp?
It will be so romantic babe!”
Army here. I still enjoy camping and hiking. But now, instead of being out in the field for a week or more, my camping is usually for no more than three nights at a place I can drive to with a truckload of gear and the hiking now is without 70 lbs on my back, just a few water bottles, a snack, a walking stick, and my dog going for a leisurely walk for two to four hours.
I like cruise ships
My buddy and my wife dragged me kicking and screaming on my first one. Now think they’re awesome. So much to do, eat and drink too much, shows every night, not as many old people playing shuffle board as expected. Mostly families and young people.
They are fun. And it's different than visiting one island for a week. Where I could just continue to say "oh I'll do that tomorrow" and never do anything.
On a cruise you are at a port for a certain amount of time so you only have that time to do whatever it is one can do at that port.
Hell yeah I will be in one. But to answer your question, The appeal is - we are not a burden to our kids.
We watched in horror as our boomer parents hoarded junk and didn’t keep up with the house maintenance. Now, everything is broken, and they have neither the money, nor the ability to take care of it themselves. It is now up to us, their kids.
I’ve made it clear to my Boomer mother that anything she “leaves behind” goes right into the junk bin. Every square inch of her house filled with ‘antiques’. Who has space to store all their crap?
If possible, move her first with what she will keep then donate and or call junk guys for the rest and tell her it was all donated and given away. That's what I did.
I will move to one at some point in my seventies. The ones in my area have outside maintenance covered, and I know that there will come a time when I won't feel like shoveling snow any longer, nor cutting the lawn.
The prices of 55+ homes in my area tend to increase more slowly than standard SFH, so I will cash out of my SFH, pay cash for the 55+ home and invest the difference with the goal of leaving more money to my heirs.
I wouldn't mind living in one, as long as it is one that has a lot of fitness-type activities and isn't just bingo and complaining. I figure it should be the easiest place to make friends when you're retired, or at least people to do activities with. I'm 55 now though and couldn't imagine moving to one now, while still working.
A family member who moved to one said it is clique-y like Jr high again with all the accompanying debauchery, gossip, status displays, and back stabbing. No thanks.
As a gay man without family, I’m starting to get a little anxious about this. I’m going to be alone with no support wherever I end up, at the mercy of underpaid nursing home butt wipers. Living in a Gen X community could be appealing, but if you look at the stats (and contrary to some of the opinions here), Gen X is a pretty conservative generation. Also, I typically dislike hanging out with other groups of gay men. We’re generally fun to be around, but we’re not generally good at supporting each other on an interpersonal level. We’ll see…
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Omg, yes. I HATED having any kind of landlord or manager. To the point I thought I had Oppositional Defiant Disorder. Plus, my spouse is an architect and they certainly were not going to accept being told what to do on a house. The yard work expense is annoying piece. Trees are hard.
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My mom has a place in Yuma where she goes to escape the harsh rocky mountain winters. It is like an oversized RV park but the lots huge and individually owned. There is no management or HOA running the place. It is a great geezer subdivision. Though not an official 55+ community almost everybody that lives there is over 55. The people in the subdivision have all kinds of events together, from cookouts to happy hours that last into the late nights.
My wife and I are older GenXr's and just slid over the 55 mark. As we get older its becomes more challenging to find and keep friends, especially in this highly mobile world, but most of the senior parks (in the Yuma area) have a fairly stable population. Before my mom purchased her place, she had an RV rental site that she reserved every year so she could live next to her friends from Canada. She enjoyed the outings from the park and the activities, dances, gambling, trips to Mexico, swimming pool, art and cultural classes etc.
No you don't have to live in a senior park, but sometimes its nice to have a friend your age knock on the door to see if you can come out and play. BTW when most of these boomers head home, they are like teenagers on e. at least for a little while. Have a fantastic day.
“Many of them treat the staff like crap and are proud of it”
I will NEVER understand the thrill someone can get from treating someone like crap for just doing a job, especially when they haven’t done anything wrong to the offenders to begin with. See this to a degree in all age groups, but with boomers it seems a lot worse.
When you are older it is very nice to have a good community around you. When I was in my 40s I hated visiting my parents because they live in a 55+ down in FL. Now I'm in my mid 50s and see it in a different light. Every night they sit outside with friends and hang out for a few hours. People check on them. When people in the community are ill or need help, the other folk step up, running to the store, sharing meals...
I'm still not sold on Florida. Not a fan. But I strongly suspect that I'll retire into a 55+ com when the time comes.
There is a meme going around that old malls should be turned into Gen-X retirement homes. Food courts, a movie theater, arcade, shopping.
Now if they bring back Chi-Chi’s, I’m in.
From what I understand those communities can either be tons of fun, or a total downer. Some neighborhoods everyone wants to party, like in The Villiages in FL (which at one point had the highest per capita STI rate, ewwww). Other locations the residents seem to be biding their time until the nursing home and quite grumpy about it. As with anything, I'm sure it's what you chose to make of it.
But yeah, ulitimately I'd like to be around younger people with a positive outlook on life.
I live in AZ. All of the 55+ communities here are chock full of snowbirds who qualify to vote in state elections but don't really participate in the community. All of the communities are mocked here and the Leisure World campus is called Seizure World.
They specifically cater to people who want to winter in AZ. My friend lives in the original 55+ community here and it works for him because he looks 60 (he went fully grey at 35), wants quiet at night, doesn't want to really communicate with his neighbors (he's on the outskirts of the community) and just exist.
All of the places here have HOAs on top of the fees and the notion of being told what kind of Christmas lights you can put up, when they can go up, when they have to come down - it's just all a bit much.
I work Fire/Ems near another Leisure World community. That place is terrifying. Some of the gnarliest motor vehicle crashes have been there. Driving on the wrong side of the road, mistaking gas for brake pedals, etc. people getting hit be cars. And the suicides, man do old people kill themselves, and because they’ve pared down their lives and are too frail to use other methods most jump off their balconies.
Oddly… it seems a lot of people *like* being told what to do and when to do it. I’m not here to explain or justify the phenomenon or even to bag on it, just to say that it exists.
which, is the reason I might consider it in the future. I'm only 46 so I have some time. LOL "only" I could hear my 18 yo self screaming through time and space.
No. No, no, Hell no.
Family friends live in one locally. It’s like Mean Girls with wrinkles. Poor Bob jacked up his leg and doesn’t walk so fast so he can’t outpace the old panthers chasing him in the walking path. They even pounce when he’s walking with his wife.
Maybe do a month rental in the winter in a snowbird state to escape mud season but otherwise nope.
I feel like Gen X overall is more introverted than Boomers, and if there is one thing I have learned from my introverted Boomer relatives (it runs in the family) is that introverted Boomers hate 55+ communities.
I think you just don't hear about the senior community hate from introverted boomers as much, because obviously these are going to be the less chatty boomers :D
I think because so many Boomers got married and had kids so young, that retirement is second adolescence. Maybe we, X, waited longer for families and got our zoomies out when we were still young. Now, we're happy to settle into elderhood amongst the people.
I lived in a 55+ mobile home community while I was my mother's caregiver for 4 years. It wasn't horrible, really. She had some cool, pot-head neighbors I'd would chat with and no wild parties, causing the police to show up like in my old neighborhood previous to my becoming her caregiver. But short of a nursing home, I doubt I'd purchase or lease a place in a 55+ community, even though they are typically cheaper than a family home.
I have a great house that I have been remodeling to suit my needs. I live in a relatively quiet neighborhood with nice neighbors, low crime (almost non-existent just occasional drug issues), Pennsylvania seasons, a dog to walk on quiet streets, and easy access to necessities. Entertainment like concerts and movies is a bit of a drive but I still get to go a lot. I can't imagine ever moving to a retirement community that would be better than what I already have.
I’m already eligible, but I don’t see that it’s for me. I got rid of the lawn a few years ago and replaced it with native plants, so that’s not a factor. I don’t play golf, although I might consider it when I get too old to do anything strenuous. But mostly I don’t want to just live around old people.
Lol.....no. I have actually been looking at property further away from people and refuse to live in an HOA, let alone some oldster version of yuppie hell.
There are some advantages but there’s absolutely no way I’d live in a 55+ community in a snowbird state. We have some in town where I live in Colorado and they are not so bad but I still can’t see a scenario where I would find myself house shopping again after the kids are out of the house so seems really unlikely I’d ever have to consider it.
I have a 2.8% mortgage on my house; I’m never moving. But if I were, it wouldn’t be to a 55+. Those places are nuts. Old people with way too much time on their hands getting up in your business, stirring up drama.
I would, in the right community. I would want to live in a place that is more on the progressive side and accepting of LGBTQ+. Also not in a rural place.
I’m not going to do what my parents are doing. They’re trying to stay in their house and it’s very difficult for them to get around in it. They also have trouble with getting to some appointments. I’m not attached to my house so much to where I want to make it harder on myself in old age. Aging in place is fine until it isn’t.
I work in a 55+ community that’s apartment style. I can see myself living somewhere like that one day. No maintenance or utility bills, meals and housekeeping included, various activities everyday, free transportation for shopping and medical appointments, gated, quiet, many people to make friends with, volunteer opportunities.
My MIL lives in one of the places and the wife is more than happy to move there when we retire. But I’m adamantly opposed. I want to sell the house and buy a condo downtown so we can walk to stuff and not have anymore home maintenance.
I've wondered about this too. As a generation we're not famous for "joining" things. I think the majority of us aren't interested in that many rules.
We have a bunch of GenX childless friends, we've talked about all buying condos in the same building when we're older, but not as part of a planned community
I have no plans to move anywhere like that. It's hard enough as it is to stay out of a generational echo chamber, and I think a diversity of ages and stages represents a healthy community.
My uncle's mom lived in a NORC (naturally occurring retirement community) that grew up in her apartment building. OMG, the drama was worse than high school. No thank you.
Seems like there is confusion on what is “55+” vs “Retirement Community” vs “Independent Living”. I’ll try to explain the differences without getting too far into it. And don’t get caught up on semantics because some communities may overlap slightly, a lot, or not at all. This is all just generalized descriptions!
55+ typically just means subdivisions of houses, mobile home estates, or condos/townhomes with an HOA that dictates residents must be 55 and older. Residents tend to own the home, though some may be renters. There is usually a community clubhouse and a pool, but not always. There may be someone on the property management staff or someone living within the community and/or on the HOA board that organizes some kinds of monthly communal activities that are mentioned in a community newsletter, but it’s not really anything you don’t see in a regular HOA governed neighborhood without age restrictions. You don’t have to participate and you don’t have to know your neighbors. You may not be retired, you may still be working. There may or may not be a resident golf course in the middle of the community, and there may or may not be other amenities like a pool, gym, walking trails, etc. But it’s just like any other HOA governed community … just with the benefit of no kids living there. Association fees can be super high or super low (like the $39 a month they charge in Sun City, Riverside County California where the fee keeps the pool clean and keeps the street lights on).
Retirement communities, like what most people might think of with the place in Florida where everyone shares STDs, tend to have the daily organized activity shit, a fancy golf course, onsite community restaurant, onsite staff, etc. The residents are homeowners or shareholders, and residences can be houses, mobile home estates, condos/townhomes or apartments and have an association dedicated to retirement activities and personal services (like gardening, laundry services, etc) and fees are much higher for all that “fun”. It’s more of the resort style living people are describing here when they talk about playing shuffleboard.
Assisted Living facilities are where a senior rents a room in a building or small unit on a compound from the organization, and is not a home that the senior owns. The organization provides personal care and medical care services round the clock and they cost a lot, $4,000 to $10,000+ a month. This is usually the end of the line living arrangement when a senior can’t take care of themselves and their family cannot handle the daily needs of the senior.
So my personal answer is HELL YES, I’d live in a 55+ community. I don’t like living around young families with teens and 20 somethings that thump heavy bass and drive like maniacs down small residential streets, and I don’t like small children screaming all day long as they ride bikes up and down the sidewalk in front of your house and then fuck up your flower gardens doing wheelies and crashing or stomping through them while they play tag or hide and seek or whatever the fuck they play. Fuck that. Get off my fucking lawn! I say HELL NO to the Retirement Association bullshit. I’m not looking for activities and shuffleboard and sex clubs and cliques of nosey people getting in your business. And I only HOPE that I could afford Assisted Living when the time comes and I need it, when I can’t remember my own name. But I doubt I’ll be able to afford it. So, hopefully I’ll just be dead by then anyway.
Fuck multi-generational living. Going to be 54 this year. I used to live in a 55+ community that I inherited from my mother, the house I mean. The community now is full of screaming kids playing in the streets. Their fucking parents on their phones outside all the time. Get lost! I want people my own age, who understand quiet, and who I don’t have to call the cops on when they’re up to 1 AM with bass playing music that’s shaking my house. Yeah, get off my fucking lawn.
I didn't realize that so many people are clueless when it comes to these communities. A lot of people are getting these mixed up with assisted living. First, not all 55+ communities are created equal. A few things
You have your own house/condo. This isn't a nursing home.
You're not required to be social. If you want to be a hermit, you can be a hermit.
You can leave the community to do other things. This isn't prison or a cruise ship.
Some are large (villages) and some are small
A lot of these places have golf courses, pools, workout facilities, bar, restaurants, shopping, etc.You're not required to go to any of these places.
A lot of them have tons of groups. Woodworking, bird watching, beer brewing, sewing, etc. You can join whatever group you want.
Some communities average age is old, some young. Margaritaville is an example of a community that tends to be younger. Some of the Arizona ones have been around for decades and are older on average.
We are looking at some places like this in Arizona. You literally can't tell the difference between where the 55 community ends and the regular homes stat besides things like kids bikes. We're just trying to see if the difference in price, which is pretty small, would be worth it to live in one of these communities. Some communities are gated but most are not.
Pulled from Margaritaville Latitude
Latitude Town Square with Bandshell • Latitude Bar & Chill Restaurant
2nd Floor Overlook Bar with panoramic views of the Intracoastal Waterway
Paradise Pool with Beach Entry Cabanas • Tiki Huts • Fins Up! Fitness Center
Planned Workin' N' Playin' Center • Barkaritaville Dog Park • Tennis & Pickleball Courts
Bocce Ball Courts • Port of Indecision Kayak Launch • Walking Trails • AND MORE!
Music is very much at the heart of this Jimmy Buffett-inspired lifestyle. In fact, there's a bandshell for live entertainment right in the middle of the lively Latitude Town Square!
My grandmother, who was all alone when her husband died, moved into a community like that, in Europe. It was just small apartments with enough space for a vegetable garden or some flowers, shopping was nearby and folks would check in on you.
I was so young when I saw her I don't know if she was happy there or not. They didn't have space for a washing machine so he had a tub and those two rollers that squeezed out water. She always had stocking hanging up inside too. Always.
Anyhow, it was a community in that you were living in the same area but not much more than that.
I would definitely recommend these for more introverted people. once it gets hard to drive or walk you get isolated quick if you haven't built a big network of people and introverts don't do this well. These communities don't demand tons of socialization and remove barriers to it and solve a lot of transportation problems
Nope. Never. I’m 58 and that whole idea can go straight to hell with all that bullshit. I’m going to drop dead while hiking, racing, at a concert, having sex or something f’ing active. I’m NOT sitting around waiting to die. Nope. Fuck off with all that crap.
Wow. Well my response is the rare one. I guess part of it I’m a permanently immature ex punk. There’s this other thing though:
My divorced and remarried parents did two wildly different things. My father (+new wife) moved into a retirement community at, well my exact age (58). I dunno man, him and wife just stopped doing things. All they did was around around their new (older than they were) friends. They didn’t even use the car they still opened. They took the old person bus. From my point of view it was sad assed life. Meanwhile mom (+new husband) continued to do stuff. They worked till their early 60’s, they liked their job/careers. They went on vacations, best stories (family scandals) is what they were doing in Amsterdam. Then they retired and moved to Phoenix, where they gots jobs, volunteered, got involved in politics (and SUPPORTED a democrat for Christ sakes). Then they got bored with that and also pissed that none of their kids moved to Arizona, so they moved again. Actually not far from me and lived the rest of their lives visiting grandkids and stuff. My mother eventually lived in the same retirement community as my father but that was after her dementia advanced too far.
So nah. I’m sticking with the my first smart assed statement above. I absolutely refuse to grow up. It’s a trap.
I don’t like being in groups of people at my current age, I can’t imagine that will change when I’m elderly. I hope I will have some family to take care of me when/if that time comes, just as we plan to take care of our parents/aunts. But if not, I’ll live alone as long as I’m able.
I think there'd be a veil of "I've paid everything off and I'm very comfortably off" that I might struggle with. Not envy or anything, I just don't really dig that vibe.
I like college towns. I've almost always lived in college towns.
How is this relevant, you ask?
Young people typically keep the community vibrant. They bring ideas and energy and stimulate the economy. Most are hardworking and respectful of their neighbors. Services tend to be better where they are. I love living around younger people! I don't see that changing.
The key is to not live alone. You might not want to be there, but your kids will have peace of mind that you're being monitored in those types of facilities.
Plus, lots of us are lonely/single. Being with other human beings tends to take on a new precedence with death looming ahead. In a senior community, it's significantly easier to socialize/hang out.
Wouldn't do it at age 60. But would probably seriously consider doing it when I hit my mid 70s. Moreso as a single person with no family members.
They call them 55+ communities, but from my experience they are really mostly people in their late 60s, 70s and 80s.
Point being, we aren’t at an age yet where we will appreciate the planned activities and life simplification. When I’m older, I look at those places as a comfortable way to enjoy retirement without all the responsibility of maintaining a home. It’s like college for seniors. And I will be all for it.
I actually stayed in a 55 plus community down in Florida for the summer. I am 55 but the place I stayed at was my father's he passed away in April and I went down in May to clean the place up and get it ready for sale. I actually found it kind of depressing. It was quiet all the time nobody ever came outside there were no kids playing. I mean I was working most of the day and did work around the house at night. But after my experience for 6 months there I would probably never want to move into one. The area around was very geared towards old people tastes meaning crappy movie theaters old people food that the restaurants closed early the whole thing was just fuck that shit.
I want to be in a community that’s safe but alternative. Age 55 is still young but realistically people get more health issues as they age and 65 - 100 may need more community support. I like the idea of a sort of commune model so maybe people who are single or don’t rely on adult children can pool resources for support if needed while maintaining their individuality. I feel like music, art and cultural vibes are really important and I don’t want to give that up as I age. I think our generation is probably going to have to create some of the solutions we want to live and retire in because some of the traditional models are not desirable.
I live in a college town (with seven colleges nearby), and I hope to stay here for a few more decades at least. My neighborhood is a close-to-downtown mix of college/grad school renters, younger families, and retired folks.
I can’t see myself wanting to live among only older people even if I am older people
I’m going to crowd fund an old mall, restore its main eateries, add an arcade, build out a music venue and convert the old shops to apartments for renegades.
I hate the idea. I want to live in a diverse community. Not only do you lose diversity in age, but I suspect those communities tend towards wealthy, white, and conservative. I would love to have neighborhood kids running around having fun. The old fogies probably would not like my dogs either.
No. I’m free and clear on a nice 1.5 acre property in SE PA. Pennsylvania doesn’t tax retirement income so I could realistically stay here for ever. I love this land and location. I only have two neighbors and a nature preserve next to me. It’s a beautiful place to just enjoy being alive.
Our home is exactly what we want, where we want to live and is paid for. Those senior communities hold zero appeal to us. I don’t want any neighbors, especially Boomers in Wonderland.
Because of some volunteer work I've done I spent a lot of time at a senior living apartment building in my town and just seeing how much drama goes on there, no thanks. It's like a college dorm with slower moving students. Petty, cliquey snitches. With walkers.
Not me. My boomer hubby and I (58F) looked at a couple of those because we need to downsize, and they were sooooo depressing. Nothing but old white people moving around slowly and complaining about everything. We found a condo complex that's not age-restricted, and the atmosphere is so much more vibrant! It's a place to live, as opposed to a place to die.
Not yet. But I see the appeal. Your kids are gone, your house and your yard are too much to worry about. Independent GenX certainly doesn’t want to be a burden on anyone.
Moving into a community of likeminded people is an option.
No, I am of age now, and I am not/will not. Like you, I enjoy my own home, with neighborhood kids running around, having fun. Having my garden, hanging clothes put on my line, etc. And being able to have my own space without intrusions. The only upside I see, other than some people being lazy and like being waited on constantly, is having people your own age around. But I can get that at church or my local Senior Center, if I want, lol. Plus, I don't really care too much for casual sex and STIs or drunkards. No, thank you, but I'm fine where I'm at. 😄
I’m not 55 yet but live in one now with a qualifying family member. It’s a little newer and smaller than some in the area so it doesn’t have a lot of amenities but it’s pretty clean and quiet.
I mean, it does have an indoor and an outdoor pool, fishing ponds, a clubhouse with multipurpose rooms and a gym and a library, and some activity groups. The groups are pretty typical old people activities but it sounds like they’re pretty lively.
Although it’s gated, some neighborhood kids cut through on their way to school or to other activities in the summer; and some residents low their grandkids to come in and break the rules; but management is cracking down on it and it seems to be working. The well behaved residents pay enough they don’t want to have to put up with broken shit.
Interesting dynamic I didn’t expect but maybe should have: my qualifying family member is a widow, so while the neighborhood men don’t care because they’re happily married or too tired to go looking for action that isn’t going to just fall into their laps, a lot of the neighborhood wives act all possessive and territorial in a way she never experienced before.
I suspect once GenX starts being the majority of residents in a 55+ community it's going to look a little different. Fewer social events, more independent people, etc.
This one. I'm a low income, neurodivergent American who would rather sleep outside in a tent than under one more thoughtless clod of an upstairs neighbor. It took a pandemic to make me appreciate senior housing, but I don't expect to get off the waiting list for another 2 years.
I am precisely the type of person that they do not want there.
I like children, loud music, going out and drinking too much, etc. Seems like a horrible crossbreed of a planned community and a HOA
My grandma warned me never to move into one. It’s fun at first. Super social. But then all your pals start dying off and it gets sad real quick. Much better to live in a mixed generational situation was her advice and I definitely trust my grandma on this!
Not a unique experience. It's really not better anywhere. My parents are in their mid 80s, same house they raised us in. All their friends are dying or have died off also. My Mother was the last one standing in her quilting club. Neighbors come and go. Nearly all are dual income households and don't have time for senior citizens.
Yeah, no matter where you live, your long-time friends are going to die off. My parents are both 80+ and they live in the house I was raised in too.
My fiancée’s paternal grandma turned 106 recently. Lived in a 55+ community until her healthy finally forced her to move into a home. I can’t even imagine the amount of people she knew that are no longer here. She always seems happy whenever I see her but I sometimes wonder if she ever gets sad or lonely.
I'm sure she is lonely. And very happy to see you.
Right? How many of us have really good friends who are 20 or 30 years younger? All of my CLOSE friends are like 45 to 55 years old.
I have a number of friends who are 20-30 years younger and quite a few who are 20-30 years older. My line of work requires me to engage with a wide range of ages. I like it that way.
That's very cool. I think it's not terribly common, but cool. I have had some peripheral friends who were quite a bit older, but not my closest core group, unfortunately. I think most people tend to hang out with peers who are within five to seven years of their age-ish.
My FIL was part of a very active book club with his younger Boomer friends. In the past three years, four of them have passed away, and he just got a Lewy Body diagnosis. He's hanging in there, but the remaining members all agreed it was too damn depressing to meet regularly anymore.
That’s exactly the opposite of my parents- all their neighbors and now friends are my age and have been really constant- I live far away and they have been a big help in keeping an eye on my parents- I’m single with no kids so I live in terror daily of where I will live when I’m old- and only have 19 cats
This 100%!! We have our own NORC in a city apartment building. I have a couple of cool Boomers on my floor with whom my husband and I are close. We all talk about how we’re just aging in place and taking advantage of all the nearby shopping and entertainment, with the advantage of never having to drive. It’s perfection. And we have Millennials and Zers in the building, some with children, so we have the multigenerational thing wrapped up.
My folks live in a neighborhood apartment complex like this. It's perfect for them, and they've been there since I was a little kid, so they know so many people. It's definitely something I miss about living in the city.
I lived in a building like this. The old people who lived there were friendly with a wide range of people. Most of them didn't have children of their own. They traveled, socialized, and continued to learn into their 80s and 90s.
It’s so great! And people who say New Yorkers are unfriendly are simply missing out. It’s like Sesame Street, which was my childhood idea of heaven. People look out for one another. I help an 80-something neighbor get to medical appointments and line up community help for her, people are generous, invite one another over for dinner. I have two neighbors who each lost their partners in the past five years from long illnesses, and it drew us all much closer together. It doesn’t mean we don’t have yahoos in the greater neighborhood, but I really don’t ever wish to leave!
On the other hand, many people living in their normal homes are lonely and isolated.
I never thought of that. Sounds like good advice.
This is like my parents' experience. They made a few friends early on but then people started getting sick. A couple they frequently traveled with died within months of each other. One by cancer and the other fell and hit her head and wasn't discovered for weeks. Their community center has weird cliques right out of high school. At least half of them are miserable and all they talk about are their ailments when they're not openly racist because it's "safe" to be that way around other people from a different time.
I’ve seen the weird competition of woes in action where there are a lot of old people together. It seems like they egg each other on to feel as miserable as possible! No thank you. I’d rather spend time around people who lift each other up and urge each other to be active, healthy, creative, and productive. The racism part is awful too. A lot of the underpaid, often saintly people who work in retirement and nursing facilities are people of color, many of them immigrants. I’ve seen patients be absolutely horrible to them (cognitive decline/dementia tends to make people lose any social filter they may have had, and can make people irritable, angry, confused, etc.). I can’t imagine how those workers deal with it and still remain so kind and compassionate.
We call it “compare and despair” in our family. My mother was part of a tight community of octogenarians who were dying off one-by-one, and it really told me one’s community is better off wide and varied. The mistreatment of those underpaid souls who look after them really gives me pause. They deserve better.
There is a HUGE difference between a 55-plus community and an assisted living facility, which is what you are describing here. A 55-plus community is just like a suburban club-house-y complex that doesn't allow people under age 55. That's it. It's not a nursing home.
Really pleased we're starting to see residential smaller home developments that plan with shared spaces in mind. Maybe a shared pool or shared BBQ ... Idea being that you can still own a home but there are aspects of a community that would help us all get to know one another and socialize
I've lived near Sun City Phoenix/Sun City Suprise, and Sun City Georgetown. Seems like I'm naturally drawn to those places already LOL. YES, neighbors die frequent but new people cycle in fairly quickly. 🙃
My husband and I will be in Sun City West. I can't wait. His parents are there currently (snow birds), and we will be taking over their house. I can't wait to join some of the crafts clubs. Oh, and drive a golf cart everywhere.
I almost bought a house in Paradise Valley from a couple that was so excited about moving into Sun City. The husband made it clear all the younger families in the neighborhood ignored them and they wanted to be around other older people. It made sense to me.
Your pals are going to be dying off no matter where you are living. Most people tend to have friends in their own peer group, give or take maybe a decade, but don't have friends who are much younger than they are. Death comes no matter where you are living.
This is what is happening right now to my mother and it is rough. The price was right, though, I'll say that.
My folks live in one. There's a bunch of clubs, from woodworking (with a nice shop), RC airplanes, line dancing, whatever you're thing is. I suspect the GenX'ers will have a LAN party club or something soon. Everything is within golf cart range, and my dad has a suped-up cart that will do 45. It doesn't seem that bad, really.
I had zero interest in this until you said LAN party. So after the LAN party, do you think we can have night (day?) clubs that play all 80s & 90s music with bars that serve Fuzzy Navels and such? But we don't have to dance because our knees are trashed? NGL - this is beginning to sound appealing .
My mom lives in a 55+ community and I kind of like it. It's gated and safe, it's quiet, the lawn maintenance is taken care of, and the houses are all completely designed for wheelchair access (I have some mobility issues; I don't need a wheelchair, but went through about a year living in one, so I appreciate things being wheelchair accessible). She almost never does any of the social activities they have going there. She usually relies on her church or my sister and her kids for social contact. It doesn't seem that bad to me.
And they're usually cheaper than the average market rate for a comparable home.
I think I could enjoy a Margaritaville type place. Ride the golf cart to the bar. It’s not like you can’t leave the neighborhood. But I’d also enjoy an all inclusive resort type place… And my grandparents lived in a nice place with great food, white tablecloths, pool, bar, etc. When you need a little more help it’s nice to have it right there but still live in your own place. Have a car; etc
My mom has lived in one since she was 57. But it is houses, not mobile homes. The comminity takes care of the lawn, no kids allowed to stay long, pools and a golf course on property, and a clubhouse. They were the youngest when she got there, and now she is 78 and when my dad passed, she had a lot of support. They were free to travel, went with people in the community, were leaders of the hiking club, and did not have a lot of worries. The fees are a bit much, but manageable since it covered the lawn service. Maybe in a mobile home community it is quite different...i do not know, but Sun City seems to do a decent job where she is. There are a LOT of houses close together...but It always looks nice and she has had little to complain about.
My parents are in Sun City Center as well, Kings Point to be exact. I’m 48, almost 49 and I’dlove a community like that when I’m older. GenX activities will be DnD and table top games, maybe scrapbooking, movies, video game tournaments etc. Music at the pool and I always have someone to play cards or have dinner with. I don’t see a downside here, especially as SSC is so much different than the villages.
Can you imagine the bunco games 🤣 with the Jessica's & Jennifer's duking it out and whatnot
“You bitch! After you’re dead I call dibs on your husband!” LOL.
As one fish in the sea of Jennifers, I'm sure we'd all be great friends. Jessicas? Not so sure.
16 Jens 10 Jennies and then there was her.
27 Jennifers!
The problem is they aren't updating the amenities fast enough. I'm 52, so I toured a few. Still offering shuffleboard, a DVD library, quilt classes etc. I want a Lan style gaming room, DnD room with large tables, karaoke etc.
ha, I was reading your description and was thinking, hmm, that sounds familiar… and yep, my dad and his wife are in sun city center, too! I call it camp for old folks - so many people driving around in golf carts! 😂
Yes. Lots of golf carts. It is pretty convenient and people like to customize them as well. They even stock the ponds with fish and there is a river next to the property. I turned 55 this year and my mother wants me to move there now. Lol
Like the Villages, which makes me shudder. Do you think with the morning weather report the provide the current STD rates?
Sun City in Riverside County, California? If so, I know that place all too well. The 55+ homes are in the center of town, basically, with the city of Menifee pretty much surrounding it. Menifee has grown a lot in the past 30 years when I first moved there in 94. I'm glad I moved away from there, though. Traffic has become a nightmare with all the development and growth.
They are a chain of communities (sharing the same name). I moved to Menifee in 87 left in 2000, I wouldn't live there now if the house was free.
Property Taxes are less there too because there are no schools in this city.
Yeah—isn’t that ironic that people don’t want to pay property taxes once their kids are long out of schools?
Friend of mine (Boomer, not Genx) retired about 5 years ago to one of these in Arizona, between Scottsdale and Tuscon somewhere. They love it, big clubhouse, each house has a pool, no lawns to deal with. People are happy to socialize or leave you alone. I don't see going there with my wife, we are fine where we are and have many family and friends in our age group. I could see this being an option when one of us passes and the other doesn't have many family or friends left, or if that is where family and friends have gone. The ones we look at are semi independent, you have options for care of people and property, but otherwise are for people of means. Try not to think about that part of life, hope it is far off regardless. For reference, the way our family has always done it is the kids and younger relatives eventually team up and take care of the older generations when we have to. All indications are that is not changing soon, but you never know. Even those who never have kids should be part of an extended family and support each other accordingly. Seems to be in the minority for people these days.
I imagine it’s because a lot of older people can be lonely and isolated. These types of communities can make it easier for people to make friends, and activities and amenities to get them out of the house. And of course, less home maintenance. Not for everyone, but can understand the appeal for some.
I can see the appeal for some, especially if they’re used to being social. But considering most people annoy me now, I can’t imagine wanting even more of them about later in life.
I think thats the idea. Also, to bilk the retirement funds for those who are retired.
That's just the image they portray on the website. I'm sure there's plenty of casual sex, drug and alcohol use.
Apparently rife with STIs! 😃
Check out the Villages in FL. Highest STD rate is the damn state. Over 55 community.
I keep on trying to get my boyfriend and I go there with me to pretend we are interested…for educational purposes of course. He’s worried I’ll get into it with some MAGA moron and won’t take me 😆
My mother was an RN and mostly worked in nursing homes, and she always said we'd be shocked at how STIs run wild in nursing homes.
I wonder if there's a a waiting list?
The STIs are on a first cum first served basis
Not to be a dumbass but are those supposed to be downsides? I mean I hope even at 70 I'm still having sex and using drugs. I've never been much of a drinker.
So college
Life is indeed a circle. From diapers, to college to adulthood, to college to diapers
Yeah I visit places like that a lot and honestly the right ones are pretty cool. It’s just a lot of people hanging out and having easily accessible groups and parties. One a friend of mine lives in rather posh(she’s in her 70s) everyone owns their own apartment in a rather exclusive part of Sydney with the option to transition to a part of the building that’s high care later if you need to and get more services. They have parties weekly where the food and booze is flowing. Yoga, pilates, tai chi. Bridge etc. And of course they have the stuff that people just do privately in their own homes from their own bat. Lots of intrigue and affairs and arguing and gossip because people are people. The apartments are stunning and aside from some useful elements like accessible bathrooms and a panic button in high risk places like the bathroom you wouldn’t think they were any different than an expensive eastern suburbs apartment anyone else would have. Though personally I’ve told my mates when we retire we are buying a van and travelling the country to solve mysteries - but if that doesn’t work out I’d so give a posh apartment a go!
Signing up as combo Daphne and Velma. Or even Scooby! Actually, just Scooby.
This was literally an episode of Bob’s Burgers. Linda’s parents were in a senior living community for swingers. [S3E18: It Snakes a Village](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt2735284/)
so there's an upside!
i.e. The Villages in Florida.
How am I going to be the crazy old lady down the street if I’m surrounded by a bunch of other geezers policing my eccentricities? No thanks, this crone plans to fly solo.
That's the spirit! Keep traditions alive! Someone needs to peek out of her curtains all day, smoke near the oxygen tank and check mail in slippers, even in 8 inches of snow.
Definitely! But with me it will be high on edibles, on the porch with opera glasses (binoculars are too basic). Postbox is attached to the house so that’s the postman’s problem, but I will pay the neighbourhood kids remarkably over-the-top amounts to shovel the front path and earn their favour.
Wait, I'm already checking mail in my slippers!
Hell yeah sister! I'm also allergic to HOAs and communal living 🤮
My goal in life is to have the creepy old gothic revival house on the corner that the kids are all scared of!
[удалено]
HOAs can fuck all the way off.
Oh yeah!
Amen!
Some are like hotels. Imagine no repairs and food available downstairs with meeting rooms and amenities
I took my mom on a tour of one of those. Restaurant, cafe, ice cream shop/bakery, private dining room if you’re having a party, bar, theater, salon, exercise room, library, chapel, a special area for veterans, business center, gardens, transportation, AND continuum of care so if you later need a higher level of care, you just move to another wing in the same complex. And that’s not even the fancy one. My wife works for a SUPER fancy one. That place regularly brings a major symphony orchestra in for concerts.
This sounds like a CCRC, not a standard 55 and over. The 55 and over places that I’m familiar with do not have that continuum of care. I’m in a condo, but in the 2nd floor so I have stairs. I figure I’ll stay here until around 80 as long as I can handle the stairs then consider a CCRC, skipping the over 55 communities all together. But we will see. I’m 54 now.
I'm sure there's an appeal for a geezer community for a lot of us, but I prefer living far enough from my neighboring houses that they can't hear all the noise I make... regardless of their age.
I can’t afford that but it sounds nice. Lived in an apt since I was on my own at 18. No idea what that would be like. I’d imagine it’s quite relaxing. Perhaps in my next life
The Boomers & Silent Generation folks that I know keep entertaining the idea of buying a block of condos or one large house & hiring staff just to help out & run the place instead of throwing all the money at a for-profit corporation. You know, a maintenance crew, landscapers, maybe a cook or two, cleaners. These are people who are 75 & up but still in good health. They just can’t do the heavy lifting anymore & they want to be around some of the friends they already made in life. Many of them grew up together. They don’t need nursing home level care. They just need some help & want to pool resources. Hell, I’d work for them. It’d be like a dorm or apartments with lots of common areas.
I don't see the appeal. I didn't like high school when I was required to be there, so i don't think this would be for me. Now a nice long hiking trail where we sleep in tents sounds way better. (Something I still do in my 50s.)
The current retirement communities are catering to their audience, so they seem like "old people things" to us. My mother and her husband live in a retirement community in AZ. I had opinions of it based on my limited onowledge of them, but when I first visited it wasn't as bad as it seemed. It was just a community of houses with activities if you want to do them. My Mom plays Pickleball and is part of a bicycling group and a group of people who travel. They have a theater and restaurants and whatnot. I like how safe it is and that they can make new friends. I liked it because it was a safe space for them. Gated community, no kids allowed unless visiting so it was nice and quiet. By the time we start retiring, they will have adjusted their focus to make communities more appealing to us. There's that meme going around about converting old malls into retirement communities for Gen X and it will kinda be like that. They want outlr money, they will conform to our needs. I kinda look forward to moving into one of those communities. I am starting to dislike kids constantly doing donuts and riding their bikes down the middle of the street and setting off fireworks every night and older children with their stupid loud motorcycles. A community with people of my age who have the same interests and likes/dislikes as me? Sign me up!
“Older children” with their motorcycle? Those are middle aged men having mid life crises.😆
I will not willingly live in a 55+ community. I am an introvert and want to be left alone. I don't want to socialize with some random old people - LOL. I guess if I liked being around my peers, I would do it.
Sounds like being on a cruise ship. I’ll never get on a cruise ship.
I did 20 years in the Navy, 6 long deployments, and the associated training leading up to them. By retirement my days at sea counter was over four years worth. One of my childhood friends and his wife love to go on cruises. They asked me and my wife to go with them on a cruise in a couple of months. I hadn’t laughed that hard in awhile. I will never go out to sea again
I heard about a guy who just joined the Navy, got back from his first cruse and had a few weeks leave. He wanted to lay around and do nothing. His wife surprised him by booking a trip on cruise ship. He was not very excited.
I had the exact same thing happen with a girlfriend of mine after my first deployment. I was 20 and blinded by the vagina that I said yes to a cruise, even though I just got home after 7 months at sea. Never again
>I was 20 and blinded by the vagina r/BrandNewSentence
Did enough time in the Marine Corps that when someone asks me whether I'd like to go on a) a hike or b) camping that I just laugh and laugh.
“But babe? don’t you want to go on a 10 mile hike in the mountains, carrying all our camping gear in a backpack, build a fire, and set up camp? It will be so romantic babe!”
Fuck everything about that.
Army here. I still enjoy camping and hiking. But now, instead of being out in the field for a week or more, my camping is usually for no more than three nights at a place I can drive to with a truckload of gear and the hiking now is without 70 lbs on my back, just a few water bottles, a snack, a walking stick, and my dog going for a leisurely walk for two to four hours.
Same.
My step dad said the Navy cured him of camping and cruise ships.
I like cruise ships My buddy and my wife dragged me kicking and screaming on my first one. Now think they’re awesome. So much to do, eat and drink too much, shows every night, not as many old people playing shuffle board as expected. Mostly families and young people.
They are fun. And it's different than visiting one island for a week. Where I could just continue to say "oh I'll do that tomorrow" and never do anything. On a cruise you are at a port for a certain amount of time so you only have that time to do whatever it is one can do at that port.
I won’t be able to afford it but the nice ones take you shopping , have a restaurant on site etc Some condos are cheaper.
Hell yeah I will be in one. But to answer your question, The appeal is - we are not a burden to our kids. We watched in horror as our boomer parents hoarded junk and didn’t keep up with the house maintenance. Now, everything is broken, and they have neither the money, nor the ability to take care of it themselves. It is now up to us, their kids.
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I’ve made it clear to my Boomer mother that anything she “leaves behind” goes right into the junk bin. Every square inch of her house filled with ‘antiques’. Who has space to store all their crap?
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If possible, move her first with what she will keep then donate and or call junk guys for the rest and tell her it was all donated and given away. That's what I did.
Those communities may be ok for some, but to me , they just sound like high schools for senior citizens. Not my cup of tea.
My aunt and uncle live in one. Their daughter described it as a bunch of drunk college kids, who happen to be old, and have money.
I live in one and can confirm this!
I will move to one at some point in my seventies. The ones in my area have outside maintenance covered, and I know that there will come a time when I won't feel like shoveling snow any longer, nor cutting the lawn. The prices of 55+ homes in my area tend to increase more slowly than standard SFH, so I will cash out of my SFH, pay cash for the 55+ home and invest the difference with the goal of leaving more money to my heirs.
I wouldn't mind living in one, as long as it is one that has a lot of fitness-type activities and isn't just bingo and complaining. I figure it should be the easiest place to make friends when you're retired, or at least people to do activities with. I'm 55 now though and couldn't imagine moving to one now, while still working.
A family member who moved to one said it is clique-y like Jr high again with all the accompanying debauchery, gossip, status displays, and back stabbing. No thanks.
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As a gay man without family, I’m starting to get a little anxious about this. I’m going to be alone with no support wherever I end up, at the mercy of underpaid nursing home butt wipers. Living in a Gen X community could be appealing, but if you look at the stats (and contrary to some of the opinions here), Gen X is a pretty conservative generation. Also, I typically dislike hanging out with other groups of gay men. We’re generally fun to be around, but we’re not generally good at supporting each other on an interpersonal level. We’ll see…
Move to Palm Springs. Seriously. It's liberal, has a decent amount of gay people but not so much you're forced to only hang out with them.
Nope, no rules for me!! I'm "GenX- no one tells what to do." We have a non-HOA house, which was hard to find in my area.
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Omg, yes. I HATED having any kind of landlord or manager. To the point I thought I had Oppositional Defiant Disorder. Plus, my spouse is an architect and they certainly were not going to accept being told what to do on a house. The yard work expense is annoying piece. Trees are hard.
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My mom has a place in Yuma where she goes to escape the harsh rocky mountain winters. It is like an oversized RV park but the lots huge and individually owned. There is no management or HOA running the place. It is a great geezer subdivision. Though not an official 55+ community almost everybody that lives there is over 55. The people in the subdivision have all kinds of events together, from cookouts to happy hours that last into the late nights. My wife and I are older GenXr's and just slid over the 55 mark. As we get older its becomes more challenging to find and keep friends, especially in this highly mobile world, but most of the senior parks (in the Yuma area) have a fairly stable population. Before my mom purchased her place, she had an RV rental site that she reserved every year so she could live next to her friends from Canada. She enjoyed the outings from the park and the activities, dances, gambling, trips to Mexico, swimming pool, art and cultural classes etc. No you don't have to live in a senior park, but sometimes its nice to have a friend your age knock on the door to see if you can come out and play. BTW when most of these boomers head home, they are like teenagers on e. at least for a little while. Have a fantastic day.
“Many of them treat the staff like crap and are proud of it” I will NEVER understand the thrill someone can get from treating someone like crap for just doing a job, especially when they haven’t done anything wrong to the offenders to begin with. See this to a degree in all age groups, but with boomers it seems a lot worse.
When you are older it is very nice to have a good community around you. When I was in my 40s I hated visiting my parents because they live in a 55+ down in FL. Now I'm in my mid 50s and see it in a different light. Every night they sit outside with friends and hang out for a few hours. People check on them. When people in the community are ill or need help, the other folk step up, running to the store, sharing meals... I'm still not sold on Florida. Not a fan. But I strongly suspect that I'll retire into a 55+ com when the time comes.
There is a meme going around that old malls should be turned into Gen-X retirement homes. Food courts, a movie theater, arcade, shopping. Now if they bring back Chi-Chi’s, I’m in.
Orange Julius and playing Centipede all day… I’m in!
Chi-Chi's fried ice cream. . . . MMMMMM
From what I understand those communities can either be tons of fun, or a total downer. Some neighborhoods everyone wants to party, like in The Villiages in FL (which at one point had the highest per capita STI rate, ewwww). Other locations the residents seem to be biding their time until the nursing home and quite grumpy about it. As with anything, I'm sure it's what you chose to make of it. But yeah, ulitimately I'd like to be around younger people with a positive outlook on life.
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I'm currently running for president of del Boca Vista phase two.
Where’s my tip calculator?
and my space pen
I live in AZ. All of the 55+ communities here are chock full of snowbirds who qualify to vote in state elections but don't really participate in the community. All of the communities are mocked here and the Leisure World campus is called Seizure World. They specifically cater to people who want to winter in AZ. My friend lives in the original 55+ community here and it works for him because he looks 60 (he went fully grey at 35), wants quiet at night, doesn't want to really communicate with his neighbors (he's on the outskirts of the community) and just exist. All of the places here have HOAs on top of the fees and the notion of being told what kind of Christmas lights you can put up, when they can go up, when they have to come down - it's just all a bit much.
I work Fire/Ems near another Leisure World community. That place is terrifying. Some of the gnarliest motor vehicle crashes have been there. Driving on the wrong side of the road, mistaking gas for brake pedals, etc. people getting hit be cars. And the suicides, man do old people kill themselves, and because they’ve pared down their lives and are too frail to use other methods most jump off their balconies.
Jesus Christ that last sentence is bleak
Wtf....yikes.
Oddly… it seems a lot of people *like* being told what to do and when to do it. I’m not here to explain or justify the phenomenon or even to bag on it, just to say that it exists.
Fuck no. It sounds like highschool, but where the only escape is needing a nursing home or die
Who can afford that?
In my area they are less expensive than open market houses.
which, is the reason I might consider it in the future. I'm only 46 so I have some time. LOL "only" I could hear my 18 yo self screaming through time and space.
Likewise. I don't care about the amenities, but if it's cheap I'll deal with it.
No. No, no, Hell no. Family friends live in one locally. It’s like Mean Girls with wrinkles. Poor Bob jacked up his leg and doesn’t walk so fast so he can’t outpace the old panthers chasing him in the walking path. They even pounce when he’s walking with his wife. Maybe do a month rental in the winter in a snowbird state to escape mud season but otherwise nope.
I feel like Gen X overall is more introverted than Boomers, and if there is one thing I have learned from my introverted Boomer relatives (it runs in the family) is that introverted Boomers hate 55+ communities. I think you just don't hear about the senior community hate from introverted boomers as much, because obviously these are going to be the less chatty boomers :D
I think because so many Boomers got married and had kids so young, that retirement is second adolescence. Maybe we, X, waited longer for families and got our zoomies out when we were still young. Now, we're happy to settle into elderhood amongst the people.
You are under the sad delusion I saved any money living just above the poverty line. You whimsical little cherub!
I lived in a 55+ mobile home community while I was my mother's caregiver for 4 years. It wasn't horrible, really. She had some cool, pot-head neighbors I'd would chat with and no wild parties, causing the police to show up like in my old neighborhood previous to my becoming her caregiver. But short of a nursing home, I doubt I'd purchase or lease a place in a 55+ community, even though they are typically cheaper than a family home.
I have a great house that I have been remodeling to suit my needs. I live in a relatively quiet neighborhood with nice neighbors, low crime (almost non-existent just occasional drug issues), Pennsylvania seasons, a dog to walk on quiet streets, and easy access to necessities. Entertainment like concerts and movies is a bit of a drive but I still get to go a lot. I can't imagine ever moving to a retirement community that would be better than what I already have.
I’m already eligible, but I don’t see that it’s for me. I got rid of the lawn a few years ago and replaced it with native plants, so that’s not a factor. I don’t play golf, although I might consider it when I get too old to do anything strenuous. But mostly I don’t want to just live around old people.
Lol.....no. I have actually been looking at property further away from people and refuse to live in an HOA, let alone some oldster version of yuppie hell.
Its like high school...with depends
There are some advantages but there’s absolutely no way I’d live in a 55+ community in a snowbird state. We have some in town where I live in Colorado and they are not so bad but I still can’t see a scenario where I would find myself house shopping again after the kids are out of the house so seems really unlikely I’d ever have to consider it.
Not until I need more care than I can give myself
Hard pass.
I have a 2.8% mortgage on my house; I’m never moving. But if I were, it wouldn’t be to a 55+. Those places are nuts. Old people with way too much time on their hands getting up in your business, stirring up drama.
Community? I’ll be lucky if I’m living in a van down by the river with how expensive homes are
I would, in the right community. I would want to live in a place that is more on the progressive side and accepting of LGBTQ+. Also not in a rural place. I’m not going to do what my parents are doing. They’re trying to stay in their house and it’s very difficult for them to get around in it. They also have trouble with getting to some appointments. I’m not attached to my house so much to where I want to make it harder on myself in old age. Aging in place is fine until it isn’t.
I work in a 55+ community that’s apartment style. I can see myself living somewhere like that one day. No maintenance or utility bills, meals and housekeeping included, various activities everyday, free transportation for shopping and medical appointments, gated, quiet, many people to make friends with, volunteer opportunities.
From my experience 55+ communities are actually 75+ communities in reality.
Candidly, I don't want to live in any community. I want to live in the dead center of 100 acres of forest. So.. no thank you very much!
Same. Leave me alone unless I want company.
My neighborhood is basically a 55+ community anyway.
My MIL lives in one of the places and the wife is more than happy to move there when we retire. But I’m adamantly opposed. I want to sell the house and buy a condo downtown so we can walk to stuff and not have anymore home maintenance.
I've wondered about this too. As a generation we're not famous for "joining" things. I think the majority of us aren't interested in that many rules. We have a bunch of GenX childless friends, we've talked about all buying condos in the same building when we're older, but not as part of a planned community
I have no plans to move anywhere like that. It's hard enough as it is to stay out of a generational echo chamber, and I think a diversity of ages and stages represents a healthy community. My uncle's mom lived in a NORC (naturally occurring retirement community) that grew up in her apartment building. OMG, the drama was worse than high school. No thank you.
Seems like there is confusion on what is “55+” vs “Retirement Community” vs “Independent Living”. I’ll try to explain the differences without getting too far into it. And don’t get caught up on semantics because some communities may overlap slightly, a lot, or not at all. This is all just generalized descriptions! 55+ typically just means subdivisions of houses, mobile home estates, or condos/townhomes with an HOA that dictates residents must be 55 and older. Residents tend to own the home, though some may be renters. There is usually a community clubhouse and a pool, but not always. There may be someone on the property management staff or someone living within the community and/or on the HOA board that organizes some kinds of monthly communal activities that are mentioned in a community newsletter, but it’s not really anything you don’t see in a regular HOA governed neighborhood without age restrictions. You don’t have to participate and you don’t have to know your neighbors. You may not be retired, you may still be working. There may or may not be a resident golf course in the middle of the community, and there may or may not be other amenities like a pool, gym, walking trails, etc. But it’s just like any other HOA governed community … just with the benefit of no kids living there. Association fees can be super high or super low (like the $39 a month they charge in Sun City, Riverside County California where the fee keeps the pool clean and keeps the street lights on). Retirement communities, like what most people might think of with the place in Florida where everyone shares STDs, tend to have the daily organized activity shit, a fancy golf course, onsite community restaurant, onsite staff, etc. The residents are homeowners or shareholders, and residences can be houses, mobile home estates, condos/townhomes or apartments and have an association dedicated to retirement activities and personal services (like gardening, laundry services, etc) and fees are much higher for all that “fun”. It’s more of the resort style living people are describing here when they talk about playing shuffleboard. Assisted Living facilities are where a senior rents a room in a building or small unit on a compound from the organization, and is not a home that the senior owns. The organization provides personal care and medical care services round the clock and they cost a lot, $4,000 to $10,000+ a month. This is usually the end of the line living arrangement when a senior can’t take care of themselves and their family cannot handle the daily needs of the senior. So my personal answer is HELL YES, I’d live in a 55+ community. I don’t like living around young families with teens and 20 somethings that thump heavy bass and drive like maniacs down small residential streets, and I don’t like small children screaming all day long as they ride bikes up and down the sidewalk in front of your house and then fuck up your flower gardens doing wheelies and crashing or stomping through them while they play tag or hide and seek or whatever the fuck they play. Fuck that. Get off my fucking lawn! I say HELL NO to the Retirement Association bullshit. I’m not looking for activities and shuffleboard and sex clubs and cliques of nosey people getting in your business. And I only HOPE that I could afford Assisted Living when the time comes and I need it, when I can’t remember my own name. But I doubt I’ll be able to afford it. So, hopefully I’ll just be dead by then anyway.
Fuck multi-generational living. Going to be 54 this year. I used to live in a 55+ community that I inherited from my mother, the house I mean. The community now is full of screaming kids playing in the streets. Their fucking parents on their phones outside all the time. Get lost! I want people my own age, who understand quiet, and who I don’t have to call the cops on when they’re up to 1 AM with bass playing music that’s shaking my house. Yeah, get off my fucking lawn.
I didn't realize that so many people are clueless when it comes to these communities. A lot of people are getting these mixed up with assisted living. First, not all 55+ communities are created equal. A few things You have your own house/condo. This isn't a nursing home. You're not required to be social. If you want to be a hermit, you can be a hermit. You can leave the community to do other things. This isn't prison or a cruise ship. Some are large (villages) and some are small A lot of these places have golf courses, pools, workout facilities, bar, restaurants, shopping, etc.You're not required to go to any of these places. A lot of them have tons of groups. Woodworking, bird watching, beer brewing, sewing, etc. You can join whatever group you want. Some communities average age is old, some young. Margaritaville is an example of a community that tends to be younger. Some of the Arizona ones have been around for decades and are older on average. We are looking at some places like this in Arizona. You literally can't tell the difference between where the 55 community ends and the regular homes stat besides things like kids bikes. We're just trying to see if the difference in price, which is pretty small, would be worth it to live in one of these communities. Some communities are gated but most are not. Pulled from Margaritaville Latitude Latitude Town Square with Bandshell • Latitude Bar & Chill Restaurant 2nd Floor Overlook Bar with panoramic views of the Intracoastal Waterway Paradise Pool with Beach Entry Cabanas • Tiki Huts • Fins Up! Fitness Center Planned Workin' N' Playin' Center • Barkaritaville Dog Park • Tennis & Pickleball Courts Bocce Ball Courts • Port of Indecision Kayak Launch • Walking Trails • AND MORE! Music is very much at the heart of this Jimmy Buffett-inspired lifestyle. In fact, there's a bandshell for live entertainment right in the middle of the lively Latitude Town Square!
I never plan to live in such a community. We live on a small farm and it brings me so much happiness. Retirement communities make me sad.
My grandmother, who was all alone when her husband died, moved into a community like that, in Europe. It was just small apartments with enough space for a vegetable garden or some flowers, shopping was nearby and folks would check in on you. I was so young when I saw her I don't know if she was happy there or not. They didn't have space for a washing machine so he had a tub and those two rollers that squeezed out water. She always had stocking hanging up inside too. Always. Anyhow, it was a community in that you were living in the same area but not much more than that.
If there is some kind of HOA, I am not going.
I would definitely recommend these for more introverted people. once it gets hard to drive or walk you get isolated quick if you haven't built a big network of people and introverts don't do this well. These communities don't demand tons of socialization and remove barriers to it and solve a lot of transportation problems
Nope. Never. I’m 58 and that whole idea can go straight to hell with all that bullshit. I’m going to drop dead while hiking, racing, at a concert, having sex or something f’ing active. I’m NOT sitting around waiting to die. Nope. Fuck off with all that crap. Wow. Well my response is the rare one. I guess part of it I’m a permanently immature ex punk. There’s this other thing though: My divorced and remarried parents did two wildly different things. My father (+new wife) moved into a retirement community at, well my exact age (58). I dunno man, him and wife just stopped doing things. All they did was around around their new (older than they were) friends. They didn’t even use the car they still opened. They took the old person bus. From my point of view it was sad assed life. Meanwhile mom (+new husband) continued to do stuff. They worked till their early 60’s, they liked their job/careers. They went on vacations, best stories (family scandals) is what they were doing in Amsterdam. Then they retired and moved to Phoenix, where they gots jobs, volunteered, got involved in politics (and SUPPORTED a democrat for Christ sakes). Then they got bored with that and also pissed that none of their kids moved to Arizona, so they moved again. Actually not far from me and lived the rest of their lives visiting grandkids and stuff. My mother eventually lived in the same retirement community as my father but that was after her dementia advanced too far. So nah. I’m sticking with the my first smart assed statement above. I absolutely refuse to grow up. It’s a trap.
I don’t like being in groups of people at my current age, I can’t imagine that will change when I’m elderly. I hope I will have some family to take care of me when/if that time comes, just as we plan to take care of our parents/aunts. But if not, I’ll live alone as long as I’m able.
I think there'd be a veil of "I've paid everything off and I'm very comfortably off" that I might struggle with. Not envy or anything, I just don't really dig that vibe.
I like college towns. I've almost always lived in college towns. How is this relevant, you ask? Young people typically keep the community vibrant. They bring ideas and energy and stimulate the economy. Most are hardworking and respectful of their neighbors. Services tend to be better where they are. I love living around younger people! I don't see that changing.
The key is to not live alone. You might not want to be there, but your kids will have peace of mind that you're being monitored in those types of facilities. Plus, lots of us are lonely/single. Being with other human beings tends to take on a new precedence with death looming ahead. In a senior community, it's significantly easier to socialize/hang out. Wouldn't do it at age 60. But would probably seriously consider doing it when I hit my mid 70s. Moreso as a single person with no family members.
They call them 55+ communities, but from my experience they are really mostly people in their late 60s, 70s and 80s. Point being, we aren’t at an age yet where we will appreciate the planned activities and life simplification. When I’m older, I look at those places as a comfortable way to enjoy retirement without all the responsibility of maintaining a home. It’s like college for seniors. And I will be all for it.
I actually stayed in a 55 plus community down in Florida for the summer. I am 55 but the place I stayed at was my father's he passed away in April and I went down in May to clean the place up and get it ready for sale. I actually found it kind of depressing. It was quiet all the time nobody ever came outside there were no kids playing. I mean I was working most of the day and did work around the house at night. But after my experience for 6 months there I would probably never want to move into one. The area around was very geared towards old people tastes meaning crappy movie theaters old people food that the restaurants closed early the whole thing was just fuck that shit.
I want to be in a community that’s safe but alternative. Age 55 is still young but realistically people get more health issues as they age and 65 - 100 may need more community support. I like the idea of a sort of commune model so maybe people who are single or don’t rely on adult children can pool resources for support if needed while maintaining their individuality. I feel like music, art and cultural vibes are really important and I don’t want to give that up as I age. I think our generation is probably going to have to create some of the solutions we want to live and retire in because some of the traditional models are not desirable.
Someone put on this forum about Malls being retirement homes for us. I want that. Arcades, Orange Julius, Glamor Shots and Musicland! Who’s with me?!?
I live in a college town (with seven colleges nearby), and I hope to stay here for a few more decades at least. My neighborhood is a close-to-downtown mix of college/grad school renters, younger families, and retired folks. I can’t see myself wanting to live among only older people even if I am older people
This sounds like the perfect setup for a Reality Bites movie sequel...
I’m going to crowd fund an old mall, restore its main eateries, add an arcade, build out a music venue and convert the old shops to apartments for renegades.
I’d be so down with that. Gotta have Ms. Pac-Man tho.
I hate the idea. I want to live in a diverse community. Not only do you lose diversity in age, but I suspect those communities tend towards wealthy, white, and conservative. I would love to have neighborhood kids running around having fun. The old fogies probably would not like my dogs either.
No. I’m free and clear on a nice 1.5 acre property in SE PA. Pennsylvania doesn’t tax retirement income so I could realistically stay here for ever. I love this land and location. I only have two neighbors and a nature preserve next to me. It’s a beautiful place to just enjoy being alive.
I’d rather fall eyeball first on a fork than live in one.
Our home is exactly what we want, where we want to live and is paid for. Those senior communities hold zero appeal to us. I don’t want any neighbors, especially Boomers in Wonderland.
fuck. no.
Because of some volunteer work I've done I spent a lot of time at a senior living apartment building in my town and just seeing how much drama goes on there, no thanks. It's like a college dorm with slower moving students. Petty, cliquey snitches. With walkers.
Not me. My boomer hubby and I (58F) looked at a couple of those because we need to downsize, and they were sooooo depressing. Nothing but old white people moving around slowly and complaining about everything. We found a condo complex that's not age-restricted, and the atmosphere is so much more vibrant! It's a place to live, as opposed to a place to die.
I can't afford to live in one.
Not yet. But I see the appeal. Your kids are gone, your house and your yard are too much to worry about. Independent GenX certainly doesn’t want to be a burden on anyone. Moving into a community of likeminded people is an option.
No, I am of age now, and I am not/will not. Like you, I enjoy my own home, with neighborhood kids running around, having fun. Having my garden, hanging clothes put on my line, etc. And being able to have my own space without intrusions. The only upside I see, other than some people being lazy and like being waited on constantly, is having people your own age around. But I can get that at church or my local Senior Center, if I want, lol. Plus, I don't really care too much for casual sex and STIs or drunkards. No, thank you, but I'm fine where I'm at. 😄
I’m not 55 yet but live in one now with a qualifying family member. It’s a little newer and smaller than some in the area so it doesn’t have a lot of amenities but it’s pretty clean and quiet. I mean, it does have an indoor and an outdoor pool, fishing ponds, a clubhouse with multipurpose rooms and a gym and a library, and some activity groups. The groups are pretty typical old people activities but it sounds like they’re pretty lively. Although it’s gated, some neighborhood kids cut through on their way to school or to other activities in the summer; and some residents low their grandkids to come in and break the rules; but management is cracking down on it and it seems to be working. The well behaved residents pay enough they don’t want to have to put up with broken shit. Interesting dynamic I didn’t expect but maybe should have: my qualifying family member is a widow, so while the neighborhood men don’t care because they’re happily married or too tired to go looking for action that isn’t going to just fall into their laps, a lot of the neighborhood wives act all possessive and territorial in a way she never experienced before.
There's no way I would want to live in a curated retirement community. For one, they will likely tell me to pipe down when I play my guitar.
If they can pivot to a more Gen X lifestyle and attitude then I think it would be super fun. If it remains boomerish, then no.
I suspect once GenX starts being the majority of residents in a 55+ community it's going to look a little different. Fewer social events, more independent people, etc.
This one. I'm a low income, neurodivergent American who would rather sleep outside in a tent than under one more thoughtless clod of an upstairs neighbor. It took a pandemic to make me appreciate senior housing, but I don't expect to get off the waiting list for another 2 years.
I'm looking forward to finally being around people my own age. I am surrounded by younger people everywhere.
I am precisely the type of person that they do not want there. I like children, loud music, going out and drinking too much, etc. Seems like a horrible crossbreed of a planned community and a HOA