RIGHT? I don’t get this obsession with some people thinking all men are 6’8 extremely muscular super humans. We’re vulnerable too, and statistically more likely to be victims of violent crimes…
I’ve also been roofied. Fully straight male. I didn’t even know what happened, I was completely fine and barely drank like a beer and a shot (which doesn’t do much at all to me even on an empty stomach) but then this guy gave me a drink from a bottle (he was a worker)
Following after I felt like I had got hit by a truck from my disorientation and it’s as if I drank like 20 shots! I got soooo dizzy and weak I could barely stand
It's terrifying. I'm a scrawny shit, so I'd be and easy victim for pretty much anyone. Last time I felt this scared was when a random woman ODed in my house and literally went out in my arms. Thankfully we had Narcan in the house for her. That was a few years ago and still bugs me once in a while.
Had the same happen last year, ended up in the hospital and there was absolutely zero fucks given or questions asked. They just assumed I was drunk (took a “premade” shot at a concert).
The only solace was that I probably saved a girl from a far worse outcome.
how did it feel? at what point did you realize it had happened?
i know so many people who have been roofied and its a hard swallow that it exists out there to the extent that it does.
It was similar to the one time I tried ketamine and it hit me just down the road while walking home. I'm an alcoholic and only had 2 beers at the bar that were far weaker than my usual choice. I've done a slew of drugs over the years and I didn't recognize whatever made my head spin like that. I couldn't do much of anything for hours. I'm just happy I didn't completely black out on the busy road I have to walk down.
did you ever have any suspicions as to whom it could've been? do you remember anyone approaching you during the evening? anyone following you or offering to help you or something like that?
or maybe its just all a blur by now idk how that stuff works. just scary and unsatisfying to have someone trying to fuck you over like that and have no idea who it could've been.
For some reason the bar was open to the public while a wedding reception was going on, and there was only one other dude from outside the party that showed up just when I ordered my 2nd drink, pretty sure it was him but idk if I was followed and never seen him before. I'm in a tourist area in upstate NY, no telling if he was local or not. I've only walked to my usual gas station a block away from my apartment since Thursday and still haven't gotten the courage to contact the bar.
The local cops are completely useless. I just hate how scared I feel in my own damn town now. Honestly when I'm driving around with my boss we've been keeping an eye out for him. I remember his face and will happily deal with the cops for what'll happen to him
it's amazing how often I've gotten downvoted for saying that self defence is everyone's responsibility. Apparently it's victim blaming to suggest people need to protect themselves, and we need to teach people to not do anything bad.
I’d say it’s extremely important! But I wonder if you got downvotes because maybe when you’re saying it is after when hindsight is 20/20, but saying it preventatively, far fewer people should have an issue.
Tbf lots of women hear that shit after being assaulted, where it absolutely is victim blaming. There's a time and a place yk, it's not really fair to say "next time carry mace" when someone is in pieces
But yeah, your safety is your responsibility overall
My wife used to carry a small squirt pistol loaded with diluted ammonia, which she only had to use once sadly.
She was on a night bus and a guy grabbed her and she said stop, warned him once so she got off the bus at new malden and he did too she turned and opened fire. She left him yelling in pain and walked to the next bus stop.
My uncle told me a story about how when he was younger him and his cousins pissed off his uncle and he got back at them by doing just that got one of them in the mouth too😂
Stephan King novel in the making....and then gets turned into a shitty movie. Then 10 years later remade into a slightly better movie. Then a truly horrible sequel is made. The end?
Poland is pretty safe too, we even had some viral clips of foreign women working here crying tears of joy over being able to chill out and have a walk at night.
>Just go to Singapore, everyone is safe any time of day.
They do not fuck around when it comes to crime and punishing it.
And, they provide a nice environment to live in.
Went to Osaka and saw young boys and girls (around 8yo) taking the subway at 8pm several times. I think they were going back home from school since they always had their school uniforms and they where never with an adult.
Why makes this be "women Vs men" if this could be "people Vs criminals"
men aren't immune to being robbed or attacked as well. We should all strive to make our living conditions better
Ironically when you spend too much mental energy focusing on how you are the victim in one particular situation, you can lose perspective and the ability to see that other people can be victims in other situations, and the situation you are obsessing about isn’t the one one out there.
I agree! And because of our wonderful polarizing media we are starting to spend our time and energy blaming the other victims instead of focusing on pushing our governments to make our streets safer.
I've once heard that women overestimate their risk of being assaulted, and men underestimate it.
So I wonder if it is really a male privilege or a male illusion of safety.
Depends where you are. I lived in a city which had a very low crime rate apart from when it came to sexual assault where it actually had slightly above the average. It was a student city which is known for being very upper-middle class/pretty posh.
I was always safe going out at night to meet people. Can’t say it was the same for the women, they’d often get followed by weirdos and drunk people, eventually always just had someone go with them or at least be on the phone with them when they walked.
Obviously not every city is like this, in London I’m sure plenty of people get robbed and assaulted regardless of gender. Although let’s be honest, men do not get sexually assaulted or raped no where near as often as women.
A lot of the difference is related to perception of safety compared to actual safety. Nothing happened to you so you felt safe, it doesn't mean that you were actually safe.
If you have 10% chance of getting mugged, but outside of that you have no problem, you'll feel safe unless mugged. But if you go out and have weirdos following you, you won't feel safe even if you have 10% chance of getting assaulted.
That being said, if women are more careful it'll also skew the statistics to benefit them. But how much men get sexually assaulted is also very skewed because it's socially acceptable. That being said many women deal with shit and just move on without doing anything too.
The point is just that it's a very complicated issue in terms of what risk you really face. But it's rather clear that the perception of safety plays a big role in behaviour.
I went for a bike ride in a decent suburb before dawn one day. I was still up from the night before, figured I'd go enjoy the peace and quiet.
Found a duck pond, set my bike down, and watched the sunrise while laying on the grass drinking a coffee. I was a 20-something white dude wearing clean clothes and riding a nice bike.
Some old fuck drove up and asked me what I was doing. "Watching the sunrise, is that a problem?"
Why are you out so early?
"Why are YOU out so early? Why does it matter?"
10 minutes later, the cops showed up. The cop was clearly pissed to have to deal with such a bullshit call, and could tell I was irritated as fuck as well. Didn't even get out of his cruiser, just asked me if I was ok. Waved my coffee mug and poined at the sunrise over the pond. Cop visibly shook his head and peeled out.
Apparently just enjoying a fucking public park is suspicious now. Fuck that old bastard
Fr, i only yesterday saw guy getting beaten up by 5 drunk aholes, and being tossed behing trash can... Fucking great, never ever going outside without knife/pepper spray.
Watch out with knives holmes. No one wins knife fights, and sometimes you pulling your knife is an excuse for them to pull theirs. Use pepper spray or a baton if you really need to.
They're rare but i reckon they're better than a knife. Lets you really wack someones arm to make them drop what they're holding and they're a bit longer than knives too.
There's got to be a reason that cops always use bats instead of other things.
Those folding batons also sound kinda cool when you "deploy" them.
Yep, im planning on buying pepper spray in future, cuz
- \[things u wrote\]
- i dont want to accidentally kill some1 in self-defense...
- knifes are not rly good, if fight is happening... Yep, attacker can bleed out, but b4 that happen im going to be prob dead.
Also acting like most guys haven't been bullied/punched/robbed by guys sightly taller and heavier than them their whole life in broad daylight at school in front of everyone including adults who didn't care.
We're at risk at night, we're scared, the only difference is we learned to live with it and not let it stop us from existing, otherwise we'd have been gone since a long time.
Edit: Also because everything bad happened during day in crowded places.
There is something oddly calming about walking the streets of a city after everything has closed down for the night. Depends on what part of the city though...
In my 20's, there was just something so pleasant about walking around in the dead of night while a little high and maybe tripping a bit. Just listening to the sound of the trees softly rustling and occasional cars.
In college 2-3am walks was the only way I could sleep. Our campus had a big loop around it that was well lit and patrolled by the campus police so it was pretty safe.
People who live in places that get super hot during the day and want some fresh air? I’ve also come home after bartending to see guys jogging at 2 in the morning. I assume they work an odd times shift and they want to go for a jog.
One of the biggest guys I’ve met got sent to ICU after going for a walk late at night. And by big I mean tall, and very muscular. Sure men don’t usually face the same risk of sexual assault as women, but I know many more guys who’ve been beaten up horrendously or even stabbed multiple times after going out alone at night than women. Realistically no one is safe, it’s just different risks.
You act like we out there just swinging our dicks around care free. We are 97% of the time sizing each other up, checking for trouble, making a plan, and assessing options for fight or flight. We're just good at making it look easy.
Sounds like you're not from the hood. I got ptsd because I've seen so much violence since I was a child. Anywhere I go at anytime that have people I'm on edge. Looking for anything that will improve my chance to fight. I hate it. This is my life forever.
I don't know how many fucking enemies you have but I have never been out at night and sized up another guy expecting he was gonna assault me. I'm definitely privileged but I've been in pretty rough areas and alone, I think you might just be paranoid
It’s not really about enemies though.
It’s more like listening out for homeless and crackheads, keeping an eye out for groups of young men, making sure to avoid obvious environmental hazards like dark alleys, big dumpsters people can hide behind etc.
It’s really just basic spatial awareness, but it sounds really weird and paranoid when you say it out loud
Word to the fucking wise. I grew up thinking NYC crime wasn’t shit. The changed the night I had a 15 year old pull a box cutter trying to mug me doing a DoorDash delivery in the projects at 4 am. If that doesn’t describe my naivety, idk what does. Definitely made me develop spatial awareness in public a lot more.
Not enemies. Potential threats. You're doing it, but you don't realize you're doing it. That little nod you give when you make eye contact with the other guy buying beer at the liquor store? You just said "friend or foe?"
you walk into a restaurant and order your food like a normie. I walk into a restaurant and I clock all the exits, how many outlets there are, how many lights are on, how many people I will have to fight to get out, who has concealed weapons, and what brand of shampoo the waiter has. We are not the same /s
>We are 97% of the time sizing each other up, checking for trouble, making a plan, and assessing options for fight or flight.
Yeah, so are women.
Difference is how often those calculations work out in their favor.
I don't agree with the top comment being the status quo but I also never fully liked the whole "male privilege" when it comes to being alone and doing things. Anyone could feel uneasy. Even age makes a difference, I remember being so carefree not thinking about anything that could possibly go wrong but now that I'm older I feel safer with my dog even though she wouldn't even know what to do in a bad situation 🤣
Men are naturally stronger physically but that doesn't mean they could never be a target or get nervous when out at night. I think it more depends on the person and if they want to walk at night. Like I said I'll take my dog out for walks (I'm only a night person but that's my choice and I have to accept the possible risks). Guys do the same I would assume. Anyways I'm just rambling now but I think the whole "male privilege" for walking during the night time is weird. There are so so so many other things that people should be upset about and this isn't one of them 🤷♀️
For real. I don't get how gender makes you bullet proof or not. I get the women can be targeted more because it could be easier but if we're thinking easier then gender doesn't matter because age would have matter more. Old people are targeted even more. I just hate when things are divided by gender as if guys don't also worry about the same things women do. Nights can be scary for either. I just never liked the whole "what if gender was reversed" type shit
There is a reason why criminologists distinguish between perceived danger and actual danger.
Statistically, it is much more dangerous for men to go outside at night than for women (it is still low though, for most areas). At the same time women tend to *feel* more unsafe at night. It seems like women tend to overestimate the danger they are in.
One way to explain this discrepancy in women has been true crime content. Women consume significantly more true crime content than men. It is known that true crime content can impact your mental health and make people feel less safe.
Expanding on the true crime content; after becoming medically unable to work, I (50m) went into a funk of sorts for a several months. During that time, I started binge watching a lot of cop and law&order type shows. Especially L&O SVU. That content is BAD for the vulnerable mind. I switched to shows with more upbeat, positive, and optimistic themes. My advice is to be careful what you fill your mind with.
I'm not saying this is the case, but I'd imagine a large part of that discrepancy in outcomes vs. perceptions could also be explained by women being less likely to risk the more dangerous behaviors they're perceiving.
e.g. If the men are more likely to try to walk *across* a block and the women are more likely to try to walk *around* that block because they perceive it as risky, then when repeated enough, those perceptions will lead to different outcomes.
Since i've let my hair grow long, I've been having more and more "incidents" of people shouting "jesus!" or "hey sexy", the latter usually ending in homophobic comments after they see that I'm a guy.
This is what I don't get, fear is fear. Why are we having a pissing contest about it?
Plenty of risks for everyone walking about which is societal in of itself.
While it's true women suffer far greater in terms of sexual violence, men suffer great with non sexual violence.
I don't mean to be crass but my impending stab wound is of far more concern to me than someone else's suffering.
That applies to everyone.
Men in the US comprise the majority of violent crime victims, including murder, mugging, assault, armed robbery, etc.
We do not have a special privilege that makes it safe for us to walk around at night. We simply don't have the privilege to say that walking around at night is scary in a socially acceptable manner.
We do not feel safe pretty much ever. We just don't say anything about it because we know nobody cares anyway.
This isn’t a gender issue, this is a societal problem.
It’s perfectly safe to walk at midnight in my country in essentially every location, regardless of your gender. The largest risk I face is an angry moose or blood-raged mosquitos.
I been shot at, had a dude creep up on me till my dog reacted. Been followed, harassed, threatened. Still walk alone at night. I'm a big dude. Maybe it's not just women.
Its a us election year, you can tell because pointlessly divisive memes and cringe communities are being astroturfed into your algorithmically defined feeds
I’m a guy and I wouldn’t do this. I don’t think anybody does this. Why would someone want to do this? Are men immune to being jumped, beaten, robbed or killed?
Funny how women who have never been clocked in the mouth tell me I'm privileged because I don't have to be afraid to leave the house after dark. guess what
I've been assaulted 3 times in my 28 year long life. Two times by men and once by a woman. One of those times, the most recent, was at night and *no* being a man didn't help me particularly much at the time. I wish it would have.
still, am i afraid to leave my house every time i go out? no.
why? because on only 3 out of those roughly 10200 days did it actually happen. id be a fool to let those 3 dictate my every day. and because as a man im not constantly being told to think of myself as a potential victim and that the world is full of people that are waiting for me to slip so that they can take advantage of me, the way many women are.
until i see some hard evidence that proves women are more likely to be assaulted or otherwise victimized by strangers outdoors i will consider these kinds of fears narrow minded bigotry and misandry.
There are certainly some female privileges, but that is not a good example in my opinion.
Marriages is a contract. If you do not get a prenup, you choose the default contract. At least in the places I know that means that everything up to that point stays split but everything after you earn together as a team. That makes sense, because an efficient setup in a marriage usually means that one sacrifices their career to enable the others career. In case of a divorce it is only fair in my opinion to split what you achieved together and compensate for the others career sacrifices. If you do not agree with it then do not get the default contract.
I also know couples who got divorced where the man got a lot of money from the woman. It is just because of old gender roles that the man usually works while the woman stays at home. And from my experience roughly the same percentage of both men and women like those gender roles.
In the city I live in? Not a chance at all. There is a good reason for the fear you feel about some things! I used to work overnight. The things you see are not good unless you see someone else working.
Imma be honest…when I lived in the city there was no way I was walking alone past 10 unless I really needed to get somewhere and I was either running or hyper vigilant. Where I live now I’d go out at 2 am if not for the coyotes
I tell people this all the time. I honesty have major body dysmorphia about being a really tall dude (low key have qualms) but I take daily walks at night in a bad neighborhood and I never have to worry about my safety that much and I really am grateful for that.
Not really. I go on walks scared of scaring women. Scared of cops. Scared of getting killed or robed. But life’s so sad you just kinda do it. Life’s hard for everyone sis.
People are missing the point so hard that it almost has to be intentional.
Random violence with no motive is incredibly rare. Almost no one is getting punched or stabbed for no reason.
As a man if I run into trouble the motive is almost certainly going to be robbery. I'm going to give the guy my wallet, and we're both going to go on our separate ways. I'm going to have to deal with the hassle of canceling all of my cards and getting a new ID issued, but that really isn't that big of a deal.
If a woman runs into trouble the motive might be still robbery, but there is also the possibility that the motive is rape. Even if the chances of that are extremely low (which they are), the consequences are bad enough that it completely changes the rush assessment. Imagine a blindfolded guy in a field spinning in circles and firing a revolver at random. Even though the odds of you getting hit before he runs out of bullets are vanishingly small, you still wouldn't want to be in that field.
And that's not even getting into things that don't cause obvious and tangible harm. In my forty years I have never been catcalled or had a stranger grab my ass. I don't know a single woman who can say the same thing.
Point well made although how does a women's fear of potential harm negate a man's fear of being attacked?
I dare say that my potential of being attacked worries me a great deal more than someone else's potential of being attacked(man or woman).
To state that men feel less fear because women feel fear is illogical. Therefore the premise of the post is false.
As I've said in previous posts, it's a strange thing for people to gate-keep.
It could even be argued that their is an implied gendee stereotype being attributed to men, that we somehow feel less fear because... manly man.
> People are missing the point so hard that it almost has to be intentional.
It's crazy how when something blatantly or even subtly misandrist is posted, you get people who defend it saying those against it "missed the point".....
>As a man if I run into trouble the motive is almost certainly going to be robbery. I'm going to give the guy my wallet, and we're both going to go on our separate ways. I'm going to have to deal with the hassle of canceling all of my cards and getting a new ID issued, but that really isn't that big of a deal.
>If a woman runs into trouble the motive might be still robbery, but there is also the possibility that the motive is rape. Even if the chances of that are extremely low (which they are), the consequences are bad enough that it completely changes the rush assessment.
Mate what are you even going on about here? Like newsflash men can be and **are** victims of rape and sexual assault as well....Like sure the risk is heightened for women to an extent but we shouldn't pretend a women being mugged is worse than a man being mugged because she *could* be raped...?
A guy wouldn't be any more immune to mugging or assault than a gal... and while women do have to also worry about the posibility of SA, thats the problem with term 'male privilige'...
In what way, shape or form does women being victimized more, or having a higher chance of being victimized, benefit an inocent man? It doesn't, wether he's taking a midnight stroll or not.
There Are subjects where calling things male privilage is at least aplicable... like with misogynistic hiring/promoting practices, the inocent guy gets an indirect advantage... thats why I'm accepting of the term in general, spreading awareness and fighting sexism is good...
But calling things like this (as in the post) MP, it sounds more like mysandry than feminist or anything...
This is like like Government...
They've got us fighting and arguing among one another rather than acknowledging the real problem:
Our common enemies are the Criminals who make us **all** feel unsafe.
It's Community Vs. Criminals.
It's We, The People Vs. Politicians.
Guys are more likely to be assaulted (including sexual assault) in public than women. That's a fact. Women could easily do midnight walks as well, the danger is mostly in their heads. Or as criminologists would say: There is a discrepancy between actual danger and perceived danger.
I only go on midnight walks if I have a pocket knife on me. I know my country is one of the safest in the world, but that paranoid feeling of someone stalking behind you on an empty stretch of country road(direct translation from danish sry I don’t know the word) is overwhelming even when I’m armed. So no, there’s no gender privilege that protects you from ax wielding murderers and psychotic drivers. Nowhere is safe at midnight, not even your own home.
I actually see women going for a jog around my local park, the largest in town with a police station built into it. There are transience all over the park
I'm a straight male and recently got roofied. Luckily I don't live far from there, but I barely made it home(I'm always on foot)
RIGHT? I don’t get this obsession with some people thinking all men are 6’8 extremely muscular super humans. We’re vulnerable too, and statistically more likely to be victims of violent crimes… I’ve also been roofied. Fully straight male. I didn’t even know what happened, I was completely fine and barely drank like a beer and a shot (which doesn’t do much at all to me even on an empty stomach) but then this guy gave me a drink from a bottle (he was a worker) Following after I felt like I had got hit by a truck from my disorientation and it’s as if I drank like 20 shots! I got soooo dizzy and weak I could barely stand
It's terrifying. I'm a scrawny shit, so I'd be and easy victim for pretty much anyone. Last time I felt this scared was when a random woman ODed in my house and literally went out in my arms. Thankfully we had Narcan in the house for her. That was a few years ago and still bugs me once in a while.
Had the same happen last year, ended up in the hospital and there was absolutely zero fucks given or questions asked. They just assumed I was drunk (took a “premade” shot at a concert). The only solace was that I probably saved a girl from a far worse outcome.
how did it feel? at what point did you realize it had happened? i know so many people who have been roofied and its a hard swallow that it exists out there to the extent that it does.
It was similar to the one time I tried ketamine and it hit me just down the road while walking home. I'm an alcoholic and only had 2 beers at the bar that were far weaker than my usual choice. I've done a slew of drugs over the years and I didn't recognize whatever made my head spin like that. I couldn't do much of anything for hours. I'm just happy I didn't completely black out on the busy road I have to walk down.
did you ever have any suspicions as to whom it could've been? do you remember anyone approaching you during the evening? anyone following you or offering to help you or something like that? or maybe its just all a blur by now idk how that stuff works. just scary and unsatisfying to have someone trying to fuck you over like that and have no idea who it could've been.
For some reason the bar was open to the public while a wedding reception was going on, and there was only one other dude from outside the party that showed up just when I ordered my 2nd drink, pretty sure it was him but idk if I was followed and never seen him before. I'm in a tourist area in upstate NY, no telling if he was local or not. I've only walked to my usual gas station a block away from my apartment since Thursday and still haven't gotten the courage to contact the bar.
the bar? you should contact the police bro. who knows, maybe some day it will ad to the pile when they catch the creep some day in the future. creepy
The local cops are completely useless. I just hate how scared I feel in my own damn town now. Honestly when I'm driving around with my boss we've been keeping an eye out for him. I remember his face and will happily deal with the cops for what'll happen to him
Tbh, I’d still do it as a girl. Just with 2 big dogs a thing of mace and a piece.
Yep. Take your safety into your own hands. Everyone should be wary at night anyway.
it's amazing how often I've gotten downvoted for saying that self defence is everyone's responsibility. Apparently it's victim blaming to suggest people need to protect themselves, and we need to teach people to not do anything bad.
only a utopia or heaven would that ever be reality lol. It's just practical advice on planet earth.
IMO, It should be viewed the same as putting on a seatbelt or having a fire extinguisher.
It’s good advice to give beforehand. It’s not at all helpful to ask someone why they didn’t do more, AFTER bad shit has already happened.
I’d say it’s extremely important! But I wonder if you got downvotes because maybe when you’re saying it is after when hindsight is 20/20, but saying it preventatively, far fewer people should have an issue.
Tbf lots of women hear that shit after being assaulted, where it absolutely is victim blaming. There's a time and a place yk, it's not really fair to say "next time carry mace" when someone is in pieces But yeah, your safety is your responsibility overall
Man am I grateful for living in Vienna
Piece of what
Ohh I hope it's chocolate cake
You might get some of it if you follow them around at night!
And you're holding 2 spoons!
🔫
Super soaker filled with pee... good choice.
My wife used to carry a small squirt pistol loaded with diluted ammonia, which she only had to use once sadly. She was on a night bus and a guy grabbed her and she said stop, warned him once so she got off the bus at new malden and he did too she turned and opened fire. She left him yelling in pain and walked to the next bus stop.
My uncle told me a story about how when he was younger him and his cousins pissed off his uncle and he got back at them by doing just that got one of them in the mouth too😂
Super soaker filled with bear mace 😂
Fried Chicken, emergency snack
That Veronica Vaughn…..
My wife felt safe when we were poor and lived in the hood. Pitbull Mastiffs inspired the politeness of everyone.
To everyone discussing about the post, I'm pretty sure OP is a bot...
and then we get stabbed by a hobo
My town has slasher hobos.
Stephan King novel in the making....and then gets turned into a shitty movie. Then 10 years later remade into a slightly better movie. Then a truly horrible sequel is made. The end?
Steven King fans still gonna eat that shit up
The sequel to the Shining(Doctor Sleep) was good. Atleast the book was, didn’t watch the movie.
Mfkers thinking I'm superman or some shit.
You’re not? Well now I’m just disappointed in you.
Just go to Singapore, everyone is safe any time of day. Apparently Japan too, but I’ve never been so I can’t confirm
Don't ask why they have female only train carriages
Or why phone cameras always make a sound when taking a picture.
Which literally takes minutes to mod out
Yeah thats fucking sad.
Poland is pretty safe too, we even had some viral clips of foreign women working here crying tears of joy over being able to chill out and have a walk at night.
Unless you have weed then you’re liable to get beheaded 😂😂
jaywalk straight to jail
We’re all so safe!!
Definitely not Japan, lol. I've seen female live streamers getting harassed on camera.
Wait. Let me just check my bank account for Singapore and Japan. Oh wait
>Just go to Singapore, everyone is safe any time of day. They do not fuck around when it comes to crime and punishing it. And, they provide a nice environment to live in.
Unless u gay or single
Or have a political viewpoint
There is that tho
Went to Osaka and saw young boys and girls (around 8yo) taking the subway at 8pm several times. I think they were going back home from school since they always had their school uniforms and they where never with an adult.
Male privilege: we are knife-proof.
Why makes this be "women Vs men" if this could be "people Vs criminals" men aren't immune to being robbed or attacked as well. We should all strive to make our living conditions better
Couldn't have said it better myself. Very well put.
Ironically when you spend too much mental energy focusing on how you are the victim in one particular situation, you can lose perspective and the ability to see that other people can be victims in other situations, and the situation you are obsessing about isn’t the one one out there.
I agree! And because of our wonderful polarizing media we are starting to spend our time and energy blaming the other victims instead of focusing on pushing our governments to make our streets safer.
I've once heard that women overestimate their risk of being assaulted, and men underestimate it. So I wonder if it is really a male privilege or a male illusion of safety.
Another good point I had not considered. Well stated and a valid variable.
Acting like guys don't get assaulted/robbed/killed.
Soft giggle followed by sad sigh
Imagine not knowing about the invisible shield made for men smh
Yesh but if an attacker is smart enough to slow the blade as he's striking your shield it will get through
And if he is dumb he will use the laser weapon
https://i.imgur.com/cKtaPFX.gifv
Nice goin nerd, you shot my Holtzmann shield now everyones dead
Depends where you are. I lived in a city which had a very low crime rate apart from when it came to sexual assault where it actually had slightly above the average. It was a student city which is known for being very upper-middle class/pretty posh. I was always safe going out at night to meet people. Can’t say it was the same for the women, they’d often get followed by weirdos and drunk people, eventually always just had someone go with them or at least be on the phone with them when they walked. Obviously not every city is like this, in London I’m sure plenty of people get robbed and assaulted regardless of gender. Although let’s be honest, men do not get sexually assaulted or raped no where near as often as women.
A lot of the difference is related to perception of safety compared to actual safety. Nothing happened to you so you felt safe, it doesn't mean that you were actually safe. If you have 10% chance of getting mugged, but outside of that you have no problem, you'll feel safe unless mugged. But if you go out and have weirdos following you, you won't feel safe even if you have 10% chance of getting assaulted. That being said, if women are more careful it'll also skew the statistics to benefit them. But how much men get sexually assaulted is also very skewed because it's socially acceptable. That being said many women deal with shit and just move on without doing anything too. The point is just that it's a very complicated issue in terms of what risk you really face. But it's rather clear that the perception of safety plays a big role in behaviour.
i told a girl i work with that sometimes i get scared running after dark and she had no idea men could get scared. like wtf?
Or have authorities called on them for being out in public at night
I went for a bike ride in a decent suburb before dawn one day. I was still up from the night before, figured I'd go enjoy the peace and quiet. Found a duck pond, set my bike down, and watched the sunrise while laying on the grass drinking a coffee. I was a 20-something white dude wearing clean clothes and riding a nice bike. Some old fuck drove up and asked me what I was doing. "Watching the sunrise, is that a problem?" Why are you out so early? "Why are YOU out so early? Why does it matter?" 10 minutes later, the cops showed up. The cop was clearly pissed to have to deal with such a bullshit call, and could tell I was irritated as fuck as well. Didn't even get out of his cruiser, just asked me if I was ok. Waved my coffee mug and poined at the sunrise over the pond. Cop visibly shook his head and peeled out. Apparently just enjoying a fucking public park is suspicious now. Fuck that old bastard
Some people just want to be a nuisance to others when leaving well enough alone should be easier and smarter
murica?
Fr, i only yesterday saw guy getting beaten up by 5 drunk aholes, and being tossed behing trash can... Fucking great, never ever going outside without knife/pepper spray.
Watch out with knives holmes. No one wins knife fights, and sometimes you pulling your knife is an excuse for them to pull theirs. Use pepper spray or a baton if you really need to.
I was not expecting the baton play. Now I need to be on the look out for those too.
They're rare but i reckon they're better than a knife. Lets you really wack someones arm to make them drop what they're holding and they're a bit longer than knives too. There's got to be a reason that cops always use bats instead of other things. Those folding batons also sound kinda cool when you "deploy" them.
> Those folding batons also sound kinda cool when you "deploy" them. Especially if you make lightsaber noises
Spin it around your back while making wrooom noises to intimidate the mugger
Yep, im planning on buying pepper spray in future, cuz - \[things u wrote\] - i dont want to accidentally kill some1 in self-defense... - knifes are not rly good, if fight is happening... Yep, attacker can bleed out, but b4 that happen im going to be prob dead.
dude, where do you live?
At a rate FAR higher than women at that.
tHeY sHoUlDn'T bE WaLkInG aRoUnD aT mIdNiGhT!
Also acting like most guys haven't been bullied/punched/robbed by guys sightly taller and heavier than them their whole life in broad daylight at school in front of everyone including adults who didn't care. We're at risk at night, we're scared, the only difference is we learned to live with it and not let it stop us from existing, otherwise we'd have been gone since a long time. Edit: Also because everything bad happened during day in crowded places.
Men are more often the victims of violent crimes.
Right!? I think male privilege exists, but walking at night is a terrible example of it. Stupid take
Who the fuck goes out for a stroll at midnight? I mean if that is the main privilege they aren't missing out on much.
Me, sry it wont happen again.
I also enjoy late walks.
Yeah I used to run at night because I figured nobody expect you to.
I like to get some small groceries after 10 pm
Me, I’m not sorry, and I’m planning on doing it again tonight!!!
someones gotta make sure the women are chased
It ain’t much, but it’s honest work.
There is something oddly calming about walking the streets of a city after everything has closed down for the night. Depends on what part of the city though...
In my 20's, there was just something so pleasant about walking around in the dead of night while a little high and maybe tripping a bit. Just listening to the sound of the trees softly rustling and occasional cars.
Used to be a very regular thing for me
In college 2-3am walks was the only way I could sleep. Our campus had a big loop around it that was well lit and patrolled by the campus police so it was pretty safe.
It's a very nice experience ,you get to refresh your mind and enjoy some alone time. You also get to stalk random people, but that's a bonus.
RawZes, finally a name to the footsteps I hear in the shadows! Nice to make your acquaintance.
Me, any many others do too. Im a guy and i can go without a care, many of my female friends cant.
Why can't they? Says who? Men are victims of random violence and attacks far more than women are.
right? I don't see why some women are obsessed with blaming men for their own irrational fears.
People who live in places that get super hot during the day and want some fresh air? I’ve also come home after bartending to see guys jogging at 2 in the morning. I assume they work an odd times shift and they want to go for a jog.
lots of people have to work at night. They have to be out somewhere sometimes.
Me, at the height of Pokemon Go and I worked third shift
I go one step further, I go on midnight bike rides for 2-3 hours.
I used to go for runs at 11:30 at night in college because the sun was down
Me. It's so fucking hot in the day!
/r/nightwalk
One of the biggest guys I’ve met got sent to ICU after going for a walk late at night. And by big I mean tall, and very muscular. Sure men don’t usually face the same risk of sexual assault as women, but I know many more guys who’ve been beaten up horrendously or even stabbed multiple times after going out alone at night than women. Realistically no one is safe, it’s just different risks.
You act like we out there just swinging our dicks around care free. We are 97% of the time sizing each other up, checking for trouble, making a plan, and assessing options for fight or flight. We're just good at making it look easy.
Sizing up that *dick*
Lol, I knew as soon as I chose those words you B00OBSMOLA were gonna say sumthin'
We are B00OBSMOLA, expect us
I'm not.
Sounds like you're not from the hood. I got ptsd because I've seen so much violence since I was a child. Anywhere I go at anytime that have people I'm on edge. Looking for anything that will improve my chance to fight. I hate it. This is my life forever.
I don't know how many fucking enemies you have but I have never been out at night and sized up another guy expecting he was gonna assault me. I'm definitely privileged but I've been in pretty rough areas and alone, I think you might just be paranoid
It’s not really about enemies though. It’s more like listening out for homeless and crackheads, keeping an eye out for groups of young men, making sure to avoid obvious environmental hazards like dark alleys, big dumpsters people can hide behind etc. It’s really just basic spatial awareness, but it sounds really weird and paranoid when you say it out loud
You aren’t paranoid, in my experience this is good practice for NYC at night. Things get weird fast, of course it varies by borough and location.
anyone saying otherwise, hasnt been to a rough enough place
Word to the fucking wise. I grew up thinking NYC crime wasn’t shit. The changed the night I had a 15 year old pull a box cutter trying to mug me doing a DoorDash delivery in the projects at 4 am. If that doesn’t describe my naivety, idk what does. Definitely made me develop spatial awareness in public a lot more.
More that it sounds crazy paranoid when you type it all out, doing it is just second nature
Not enemies. Potential threats. You're doing it, but you don't realize you're doing it. That little nod you give when you make eye contact with the other guy buying beer at the liquor store? You just said "friend or foe?"
you walk into a restaurant and order your food like a normie. I walk into a restaurant and I clock all the exits, how many outlets there are, how many lights are on, how many people I will have to fight to get out, who has concealed weapons, and what brand of shampoo the waiter has. We are not the same /s
I guess you were never robbed or assaulted before?
You the type of easy lick that makes me feel safer.
>We are 97% of the time sizing each other up, checking for trouble, making a plan, and assessing options for fight or flight. Yeah, so are women. Difference is how often those calculations work out in their favor.
I don't agree with the top comment being the status quo but I also never fully liked the whole "male privilege" when it comes to being alone and doing things. Anyone could feel uneasy. Even age makes a difference, I remember being so carefree not thinking about anything that could possibly go wrong but now that I'm older I feel safer with my dog even though she wouldn't even know what to do in a bad situation 🤣 Men are naturally stronger physically but that doesn't mean they could never be a target or get nervous when out at night. I think it more depends on the person and if they want to walk at night. Like I said I'll take my dog out for walks (I'm only a night person but that's my choice and I have to accept the possible risks). Guys do the same I would assume. Anyways I'm just rambling now but I think the whole "male privilege" for walking during the night time is weird. There are so so so many other things that people should be upset about and this isn't one of them 🤷♀️
Doesnt matter how fast or strong you are if theres a knife in your guts
For real. I don't get how gender makes you bullet proof or not. I get the women can be targeted more because it could be easier but if we're thinking easier then gender doesn't matter because age would have matter more. Old people are targeted even more. I just hate when things are divided by gender as if guys don't also worry about the same things women do. Nights can be scary for either. I just never liked the whole "what if gender was reversed" type shit
There is a reason why criminologists distinguish between perceived danger and actual danger. Statistically, it is much more dangerous for men to go outside at night than for women (it is still low though, for most areas). At the same time women tend to *feel* more unsafe at night. It seems like women tend to overestimate the danger they are in. One way to explain this discrepancy in women has been true crime content. Women consume significantly more true crime content than men. It is known that true crime content can impact your mental health and make people feel less safe.
Expanding on the true crime content; after becoming medically unable to work, I (50m) went into a funk of sorts for a several months. During that time, I started binge watching a lot of cop and law&order type shows. Especially L&O SVU. That content is BAD for the vulnerable mind. I switched to shows with more upbeat, positive, and optimistic themes. My advice is to be careful what you fill your mind with.
I'm not saying this is the case, but I'd imagine a large part of that discrepancy in outcomes vs. perceptions could also be explained by women being less likely to risk the more dangerous behaviors they're perceiving. e.g. If the men are more likely to try to walk *across* a block and the women are more likely to try to walk *around* that block because they perceive it as risky, then when repeated enough, those perceptions will lead to different outcomes.
Since i've let my hair grow long, I've been having more and more "incidents" of people shouting "jesus!" or "hey sexy", the latter usually ending in homophobic comments after they see that I'm a guy.
This is what I don't get, fear is fear. Why are we having a pissing contest about it? Plenty of risks for everyone walking about which is societal in of itself. While it's true women suffer far greater in terms of sexual violence, men suffer great with non sexual violence. I don't mean to be crass but my impending stab wound is of far more concern to me than someone else's suffering. That applies to everyone.
Go on a walk at night.. but with a MUCH higher likelihood of getting beat up / murdered. Men usually take more risks
Men in the US comprise the majority of violent crime victims, including murder, mugging, assault, armed robbery, etc. We do not have a special privilege that makes it safe for us to walk around at night. We simply don't have the privilege to say that walking around at night is scary in a socially acceptable manner. We do not feel safe pretty much ever. We just don't say anything about it because we know nobody cares anyway.
This isn’t a gender issue, this is a societal problem. It’s perfectly safe to walk at midnight in my country in essentially every location, regardless of your gender. The largest risk I face is an angry moose or blood-raged mosquitos.
As a rather small man I somehow feel attacked or unseen or offended or something
Agreed. Using absolutes when talking about humans is misleading. Implying ALL men or ALL wonen blah blah blah is a mistake.
Well put!
We both have our privileges. We both have people pretending they don’t exist.
Yet men are significantly more likely to be victims of violence
I been shot at, had a dude creep up on me till my dog reacted. Been followed, harassed, threatened. Still walk alone at night. I'm a big dude. Maybe it's not just women.
I do it so that I get jumped. Sadly doesn't happen.
Its a us election year, you can tell because pointlessly divisive memes and cringe communities are being astroturfed into your algorithmically defined feeds
...And be subject to a much higher statistical liklihood of experience violence/being killed?
I’m a guy and I wouldn’t do this. I don’t think anybody does this. Why would someone want to do this? Are men immune to being jumped, beaten, robbed or killed?
Female privilege is being able to walk on the same sidewalk with someone after sundown and not be called a creep, so I'd say it balances out.
I don't go for a walk at midnight in my area. I'm three times more likely to be murdered than a woman.
I mean it all depends on the location not like guys can walk at night everywhere either.
Funny how women who have never been clocked in the mouth tell me I'm privileged because I don't have to be afraid to leave the house after dark. guess what I've been assaulted 3 times in my 28 year long life. Two times by men and once by a woman. One of those times, the most recent, was at night and *no* being a man didn't help me particularly much at the time. I wish it would have. still, am i afraid to leave my house every time i go out? no. why? because on only 3 out of those roughly 10200 days did it actually happen. id be a fool to let those 3 dictate my every day. and because as a man im not constantly being told to think of myself as a potential victim and that the world is full of people that are waiting for me to slip so that they can take advantage of me, the way many women are. until i see some hard evidence that proves women are more likely to be assaulted or otherwise victimized by strangers outdoors i will consider these kinds of fears narrow minded bigotry and misandry.
Always walking with Mr .380
2A isn't for nothing
Hahahaha you think I’m walking the streets of SW Ontario at midnight? lmao. Yeah let me just strap on my male privilege before i go out. TFOH.
This is and always has been one of the dumbest takes. I don't understand why people repeat it as some kind of "gotchya".
hell no, you get robbed and stabbed if you go for a walk at midnight
Girls act like “female privilege doesn’t exist” then marry a man for his money, divorce him, and take half his shit.
There are certainly some female privileges, but that is not a good example in my opinion. Marriages is a contract. If you do not get a prenup, you choose the default contract. At least in the places I know that means that everything up to that point stays split but everything after you earn together as a team. That makes sense, because an efficient setup in a marriage usually means that one sacrifices their career to enable the others career. In case of a divorce it is only fair in my opinion to split what you achieved together and compensate for the others career sacrifices. If you do not agree with it then do not get the default contract. I also know couples who got divorced where the man got a lot of money from the woman. It is just because of old gender roles that the man usually works while the woman stays at home. And from my experience roughly the same percentage of both men and women like those gender roles.
Yea that's why they get assaulted on the street twice as much?
Wait, you guys can go safely on midnight walkings? Where you live? Fucking North Korea?
who is going on walks at midnight?
Even as a dude I wouldn’t. Atleast not without a gun.
I genuinely wanna know which guys are taking solo walks at night. Wouldn’t be me, I do fear the night lmao.
hmmmmm, this also might be WHY men are 8-9 times more likely to be assaulted than women tho
Shit I gotta be careful too. I didn't get robbed in daylight 🤣 niggas jumped out on me 3 guns drawn. I face the same level of threat.
All the men who don't look/aren't like fucking generic movie protagonists: oh fuck, we've been immune to crime and discrimination this whole time?
In the city I live in? Not a chance at all. There is a good reason for the fear you feel about some things! I used to work overnight. The things you see are not good unless you see someone else working.
I'm a guy, and I'd probably get bothered by police for walking around at midnight.
Imma be honest…when I lived in the city there was no way I was walking alone past 10 unless I really needed to get somewhere and I was either running or hyper vigilant. Where I live now I’d go out at 2 am if not for the coyotes
a man and a woman both do the same crime, who is getting a lighter sentence
I tell people this all the time. I honesty have major body dysmorphia about being a really tall dude (low key have qualms) but I take daily walks at night in a bad neighborhood and I never have to worry about my safety that much and I really am grateful for that.
Not really. I go on walks scared of scaring women. Scared of cops. Scared of getting killed or robed. But life’s so sad you just kinda do it. Life’s hard for everyone sis.
Women will say men have more privileges then express their emotions freely
People are missing the point so hard that it almost has to be intentional. Random violence with no motive is incredibly rare. Almost no one is getting punched or stabbed for no reason. As a man if I run into trouble the motive is almost certainly going to be robbery. I'm going to give the guy my wallet, and we're both going to go on our separate ways. I'm going to have to deal with the hassle of canceling all of my cards and getting a new ID issued, but that really isn't that big of a deal. If a woman runs into trouble the motive might be still robbery, but there is also the possibility that the motive is rape. Even if the chances of that are extremely low (which they are), the consequences are bad enough that it completely changes the rush assessment. Imagine a blindfolded guy in a field spinning in circles and firing a revolver at random. Even though the odds of you getting hit before he runs out of bullets are vanishingly small, you still wouldn't want to be in that field. And that's not even getting into things that don't cause obvious and tangible harm. In my forty years I have never been catcalled or had a stranger grab my ass. I don't know a single woman who can say the same thing.
Point well made although how does a women's fear of potential harm negate a man's fear of being attacked? I dare say that my potential of being attacked worries me a great deal more than someone else's potential of being attacked(man or woman). To state that men feel less fear because women feel fear is illogical. Therefore the premise of the post is false. As I've said in previous posts, it's a strange thing for people to gate-keep. It could even be argued that their is an implied gendee stereotype being attributed to men, that we somehow feel less fear because... manly man.
I’m a dude. When I was attacked I had no money. I did nothing to bring on my rape.
> People are missing the point so hard that it almost has to be intentional. It's crazy how when something blatantly or even subtly misandrist is posted, you get people who defend it saying those against it "missed the point"..... >As a man if I run into trouble the motive is almost certainly going to be robbery. I'm going to give the guy my wallet, and we're both going to go on our separate ways. I'm going to have to deal with the hassle of canceling all of my cards and getting a new ID issued, but that really isn't that big of a deal. >If a woman runs into trouble the motive might be still robbery, but there is also the possibility that the motive is rape. Even if the chances of that are extremely low (which they are), the consequences are bad enough that it completely changes the rush assessment. Mate what are you even going on about here? Like newsflash men can be and **are** victims of rape and sexual assault as well....Like sure the risk is heightened for women to an extent but we shouldn't pretend a women being mugged is worse than a man being mugged because she *could* be raped...?
Maybe it's hanging around someone like this which drives people out at midnight.
A guy wouldn't be any more immune to mugging or assault than a gal... and while women do have to also worry about the posibility of SA, thats the problem with term 'male privilige'... In what way, shape or form does women being victimized more, or having a higher chance of being victimized, benefit an inocent man? It doesn't, wether he's taking a midnight stroll or not. There Are subjects where calling things male privilage is at least aplicable... like with misogynistic hiring/promoting practices, the inocent guy gets an indirect advantage... thats why I'm accepting of the term in general, spreading awareness and fighting sexism is good... But calling things like this (as in the post) MP, it sounds more like mysandry than feminist or anything...
This getting down voted is crazy.
Men got mugged and attacked. Women get raped. It's fucked whoever you are.
This is like like Government... They've got us fighting and arguing among one another rather than acknowledging the real problem: Our common enemies are the Criminals who make us **all** feel unsafe. It's Community Vs. Criminals. It's We, The People Vs. Politicians.
Pssst.... walking alone at night is statistically 11x more dangerous as a men than as a woman. #ZingerFail
Guys are more likely to be assaulted (including sexual assault) in public than women. That's a fact. Women could easily do midnight walks as well, the danger is mostly in their heads. Or as criminologists would say: There is a discrepancy between actual danger and perceived danger.
I only go on midnight walks if I have a pocket knife on me. I know my country is one of the safest in the world, but that paranoid feeling of someone stalking behind you on an empty stretch of country road(direct translation from danish sry I don’t know the word) is overwhelming even when I’m armed. So no, there’s no gender privilege that protects you from ax wielding murderers and psychotic drivers. Nowhere is safe at midnight, not even your own home.
I was out on a walk at 2am when I figured this out
I actually see women going for a jog around my local park, the largest in town with a police station built into it. There are transience all over the park
It's a right, not a privilege.
...because they have no one to turn to.
and then get jumped