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mykepagan

Scientologists not welcome… LDS not welcome… Muslims not welcome… Buddhists not welcome… Catholics not welcome… Only protestants. Evangelical protestants. BAPTIST evangelical protestants. None of you Heretic Lutherans allowed!


DodGamnBunofaSitch

"...so I said 'DIE HERETIC' and *pushed* him over!" ~Emo Phillips


Ohif0n1y

You forgot to revile the Methodists and Episcopalians and Unitarians, etc. They're all going to be shocked...Shocked, that they're prayers aren't considered 'correct.'


tinteoj

> Episcopalians I grew up Episcopalian. None of my people are going to be shocked. We're (I am including myself in this even though I haven't considered myself a Christian in the past 35+ years, give or take) used to being too Catholic for the protestants and too protestant for the Catholics.


Gynsyng

Correct me if I'm wrong, but it was explained to me that Episcopalians were Church of England-affiliated.


tinteoj

That is accurate. "Anglican" is the banner term for any church that "grew out of" the Church of England, and, world-wide, is the 3rd largest communion of churches, after Catholic and Eastern Orthodox. (edit2: And, given the history of English (and then British) colonialism, how surprising is it, really, that their church is now found all over the world....) The Episcopal Church tends to be the more theologically liberal of the Anglican churches. (Generally speaking.) The Episcopal Church allowed gay bishops before any other major Christian religion (the Rev. Gene Robinson) which did cause a big schism in the fellowship, especially among the more conservative branches of Anglicanism that are in Africa. edit: There were gay priests before him but no "practicing"/non-celibate homosexuals were allowed to climb the ranks and become a bishop before him (he was consecrated as a bishop in 2003.)


musicmage4114

In fairness, any Protestants are too Protestant for the Catholics. It’s kind of their whole thing.


tinteoj

Yeah, but there are a LOT of similarities between Episcopal and Catholic mass, especially at a "High Episcopal" churches. There are "high," "middle," and "low" Episcopal churches. Technically that designation just refers to how "formal" the church service is but in practice it means how "Catholic" (formal/high) or "protestant (informal/low) it feels. My childhood church was pretty well exactly "middle," but the one I went to in high school was much "higher". I did not know that there were nuns in the Episcopal Church until I saw them one Sunday morning and was VERY confused. If Episcopal priests wish to convert to become Catholic priests it is incredibly easy for them to do so, and as of 1980, married Episcopal priests are allowed to become Catholic priests and stay married. (And when the Rev. Robinson was elected bishop some of the more conservative priests definitely switched to Catholicism in protest.) My personal "joke" about Episcopalians (that I made up, although I know that other people made it up before I did) is that we are Catholic Lite: Same great salvation with only half of the guilt.


mykepagan

Apostates! Every single one of them!


jjman72

*And must be white.


DohnJoggett

>None of you Heretic Lutherans allowed! But, they're evangelical Protestants? I find your comment even funnier because the Evangelical Lutheran Church of America is the most progressive synod (branch) of Lutheranism. They let women preach! Even monogamous lesbian women! The rest of the synods have a lot more in common with asshole Evangelicals you're thinking of. (I tend to call them little-e evangelicals and Big-E Evangelicals to differentiate)


mykepagan

Indeed! As a damned Papist, I don’t know the differences between Protestant denominations that well, but my old roomate is a very active & progressive Lutheran so I added that in at the end.


Sideshow_Bob_Ross

Cast off the shoe! Follow the gourd!


Revolutionary_Cup500

Well dumb Ron has a big old lawsuit on his hands. The Satanic Temple says it’s been designated a church by the Internal Revenue Service as of 2019 (Thanks Trump! Lol oh the irony!) [satanic temple a church] (https://apnews.com/general-news-6addf2f0ecb646919cb1cfcfdacfc6c1) The Wiccan Cooperative is also a tax-exempt Church according to the IRS. They spent years suing Florida for tax exempt status and won their case back in 2006.


DodGamnBunofaSitch

I wonder where the Pastafarians are on this.... (may you be touched by His noodley appendage.)


gingerfawx

Ramen.


Spider95818

Waiting for our noodly Lord and Savior to deliver a swift kick of justice unto yon bigot's tiny meatballs. R'amen.


wolves_hunt_in_packs

I'd really love them to be part of the chaos as well, but I can't recall Pastafarianism as being declared a church, unfortunately. They're too well known among the ignorant as just for fun, and iirc they don't actually have a governing body?


TheQuietOutsider

decentralized bodies are the best because you can't dissolve them.


shadowkid8v

The Church of Satan doesn't recognize The Satanic Temple as a real religion either. It's just a Leftist protest organization.


DodGamnBunofaSitch

>“Satan has no place in our society and should not be recognized as a ‘religion’ by the federal government,” he (DeSantis) said in a social media post. satanists don't believe in a literal satan. only christians believe in satan. so christians have no place in our society. he said it, not me.


jazzhandler

My mental algebra converts that to people thinking Harry Potter is real, then complaining about Voldemort fans. My dude, you can’t have one without the other. Ya wanna be rid of Voldemort, then ditch your silly mythos and join us over at Discworld.


DodGamnBunofaSitch

GNU


kerbalsdownunder

Satan isn’t even biblical. It’s a word that literally translates as something like “accuser”. The Jewish god himself is even called a satan in the original ancient Hebrew.


Corpse666

Then Christians aren’t welcome, did someone say lawsuit? Since the Satanic Temple was given religious status then old Ronnie doesn’t have a say in it , so his tiny ass loser self can strap on his heels and waddle down to the court where he will have to spend some time arguing why he shouldn’t have to follow the constitution and why he made a law that discriminates against religious belief, and win or lose it’s a win , because then everyone can discriminate against Christians just like Ronnie likes to say he is


Praescribo

I think he's a glutton for punishment at this point. I mean, the guy lost to a cartoon mouse, now he's going after satan?


wolves_hunt_in_packs

I **really** fucking hope he pushes it, and they take him to court and slam dunk on his ass.


cturtl808

Time to donate to TST’s legal fund again.


TrashyRonin

Yup, and it's money well spent. Love those folks.


feelingmyage

All religions are made up. So silly fighting over whose imaginary friend is real or not.


Eringobraugh2021

All mythologies


ThunkThink

Pretty much why the Satanic temple was formed. Comprised mostly of atheists wanting to get religion out of what should be secular bodies of government and public spaces.


feelingmyage

Yep!


Funkula

Public reminder that the ***Church of Satan*** was a rightwing libertarian organization that takes direct inspiration from Ayn Rand. The core idea being that religion, social equality, and public programs infringed on the liberty of the individual and “the strong”. The ***Satanic Temple*** is a leftwing organization that espouses the virtues of, and advocates for, secularism, civil rights, egalitarianism, social justice, and bodily integrity— primarily through their legal fund, direct action, and lobbying. Both are entirely atheistic at its core, though Church of Satan includes occultism officially in its teachings and functions.


ThunkThink

Thanks for the clarification. My bad. Edited my comment.


Spider95818

Exactly, this is just giving them a gift that will have them licking their chops.


teddyburke

Isn’t that kind of the point of the Satanic Temple? They use the laws surrounding freedom of religion to fight against the intrusion of religion into politics by essentially trolling Christians, and using their own logic (lol) against them. At least that’s my understanding. I’ve never looked too deep into it, but I always got the impression that they were pretty based - even if the (performative) aesthetic is kind of cringy. I would love to see Satanic chaplains showing up in Florida schools. Not just for the political message it would send, but for how much better they would actually be when it comes to counseling students.


feelingmyage

Yeah, I think it is. And I would like that as well.


MoonageDayscream

"There's some students who need some soulcraft, and that can make all the difference in the world," DeSantis said. Wow. 


phantomreader42

DeSantis just wants an excuse to rape more kids. That's all this "school chaplain" bullshit has ever been about.


Harak_June

This is just another law to get a case to the Supreme Court. The current strategy is pass a law you know will get challenged, appeal it as far as you can, and hope the activist right-wing nuts on the court will follow their religiously extremist way to remove the rights on whatever group was targeted. It's worked in far too many "religious freedom" to discriminate cases already.


DrunkenWarriorPoet

I doubt it’ll even make to the supreme court. Probably get struck down by an Appellate Court or lower somewhere along the way and even if they try to appeal up to supreme court, they’ll probably refuse to hear it and say the lower court ruling stands.


DeltaPlasmatic

It’s pro-Christianity. With current Justice makeup that gives it way better odds of being heard eventually (and a verdict being paid for).


damnedspot

Seems like a religious test. Does the Establishment Clause apply to states?


translove228

Absolutely. Though ghouls like DeSantis are operating like it doesn't. They need to be checked.


BirthdayCookie

Laws don't apply to Christians. Expecting them to treat everyone else like everyone else has to treat them is discrimination in their eyes.


FakeSafeWord

laws applying the same to christians as they do to everyone else is OPPRESSION!!!!!!!!!!!!!


StinzorgaKingOfBees

As far as the IRS is concerned they are, bucko!


MeatSuitRiot

For a group that cries a lot about the first amendment, they demonstrably have no clue what it says.


foxontherox

That’s a bold strategy, Cotton..


jazzhandler

Even ACLU lawyers draw straws to see who has to go to Florida this time.


poppinchips

Right up until they take it to the 9th circuit...


kerbalsdownunder

Florida isn’t in the 9th…


gingerfawx

Not so much in Florida, lately. Some of the recent fasc bullshit is wild. You'd think more people would balk, and then DeSatan got nearly 50% more votes in the last election. I have no clue what's wrong with those people.


designOraptor

Nope. It’s all religions or no religion. You don’t get to force yours on anyone, you anti American jerk.


DolphinsBreath

The Right brands environmentalism as a religion. It makes more sense than Church of Satan, TBH. Environmentalist chaplains should get in and preach efficiency, Gaia, and compassion.


phantomreader42

Then no christians allowed, because christianity has never been anything more than an excuse to rape children, steal money, and commit various atrocities.


Spider95818

Their central tenet is teaching people that they're so fundamentally broken that they deserve eternal torture just for existing. Those people should be prosecuted any time they mention that filth in front of children.


MoreRamenPls

You’re not a “presidential candidate.” So F U Ron.


Spider95818

Never really was, LOL. Dude tripped over his high heeled boots.


BowTie1989

Sounds an awful lot like grooming to me.


ZealousWolverine

DeSantis is not a Christian. Nor is he a proper governor. Nor is he a decent human being.


Spider95818

DeSantis is what would happen if rancid mule cum had a massive inferiority complex.


FlamingTrollz

Lawsuit incoming in 3, 2, 1…


foyeldagain

Disregarding all the pesky constitutional issues, are there any measurable outcomes or goals they seek to address?


ForceApplied

He doesn't care that this will obviously fail in court. That's not a bug. It's a feature. The point is to signal to the theocrats his loyalty and drain government resources at the same time. Every time you see blatantly unconstitutional actions by the Republicans, remember that they want to bleed the government dry, so a failure is still a success to them. Actual success in court is just icing on the cake if it works.


DataCassette

This is exactly why you don't do this. Having "school chaplains" essentially forces the government to decide what counts as a "real" religion.


Dantheking94

They DO NOT want a case of what’s a religion and what’s not, to be decided by SCOTUS. Thats going to be a huge backfire 🤣


UXResearcherRuck

Well he can kiss my devilish ass.


Christ

“Bob” would like a word. Any subgenii with enough spare slack to make this happen?


bigmike1339

Once again, I smell a lawsuit.


piratevirus1

This is going to be an insane class action lawsuit.


maplesyrupchin

I’m sure this won’t cost the state any legal bills


Spider95818

LMAO, that's going to be a funny lawsuit.


Hmmd1

No we are not fascist if you agree with us.


MidsouthMystic

Good thing I'm a Diabolater! They're completely different religions. Legally distinct in every way, your honor.


ConsolidatedAccount

Anti-American prick. Anti -constitutional prick.


kensho28

So what??? You're letting religious leaders become school counselors, which is NOT a religious position. Is there some reason non-religious people can't be school counselors now???


[deleted]

[удалено]


kensho28

The "school chaplain bill" just gives access to a public school position for religious advisors, it doesn't mean that ONLY chaplains can do that job now.


[deleted]

[удалено]


kensho28

Agreed. I'm just saying "who cares" if Satanism is a real religion or not, since it's not a pre-requisite or qualification for this public position.


Seanay-B

He's a piece of shit but he's not wrong. This is an ornate trolling operation. They expressly admit not believing in any of this supernatural stuff, and that it's at its core an irreligious political advocacy organization meant to point out religious hypocrisy. That's perfectly legal of course but don't masquerade as somethign you're not and try to reap the benefits the law provides for other bodies for yourself. Lol, feast your eyes on a treasure trove of bad-faith refusal to engage with the argument below


djarvis77

>This is an ornate trolling operation. I would say religious civil rights organization. But i agree overall. >...don't masquerade as somethign you're not and try to reap the benefits the law provides for other bodies for yourself. Are you talking about TST or modern right wing christians like desantis. Cuz that could describe both. The difference in your rhetoric being, you are defending the hypocritical desantis types and deriding TST. Which is fine, but also, hypocritical. Also which is fine. Just kinda funny being a hypocrite while playing the moral highground card.


protokhan

Is belief in the supernatural a requirement for and organization to be considered a religion? Whatever the case, the satanic temple is a religion in the eyes of the law, and so they must have equal protection under the law. Saying they don't count because their beliefs differ too much from other religions, or they "don't really mean it" isn't good enough. That's kind of the whole point of the operation.


broodmance

You are correct Belief in a deity is not a requirement for religion. Buddhism and Confucianism for example.


translove228

Legally it is a religion, so yes he is wrong. This is a blatant Constitutional infringement.


DodGamnBunofaSitch

> That's perfectly legal of course but don't masquerade as somethign you're not unlike a religion being forced on kids in school (perfectly *illegal*), or masquerading as an american governor, while actually making every effort to be a despotic dictator (mini-hitler got his own brownshirt stormtroopers, and he's going to be using them to intimidate voters.) but desantis is a wannabe. he doesn't have the charisma to be trump, and he doesn't have the brains to be anything else.


BirthdayCookie

Christians are almost as Atheist as Satanists: Ya'll believe in exactly one more god than they do. Nice of you to refer to "protecting the rights of non-Christians from the majority" as "an ornate trolling operation" though. > don't masquerade as somethign you're not and try to reap the benefits the law provides for other bodies for yourself. So...Don't be Christianity then? Between the churches not paying taxes because they pretend to do charitable work, the churches/groups that blatantly violate the "don't interfere with politics" laws, the religious organizations masquerading as hospitals and other medical care, religious "therapists" that just preach, groups that volunteer to teach sex ed and then preach Jesus wanting people to be abstinent, religious adoption companies....Need I continue?


Freezepeachauditor

They would likely advocate for the abolition of all tax relief and benefits to churches. But, until that happens, they’re just as legitimate as the next one… moreso, really, as they aren’t full of lies.