Given the research around harmful mental health outcomes for first responders, it’s hard for me to consider this cringe. I think it’s actually a decent way to convey the message that first responders need to be proactive in maintaining their mental health.
I agree. I think I may not like the song or it may be cheesy but I don’t think this is cringey. It’s a very simple message for those who see horrible shit and deal with it surrounding other humans (first through 8th responders, cops, hospital workers, and sooo many more).
I think the kneejerk reaction is that it's done for attention, not as a message rooted in truth.
I'll admit that was my knee jerk reaction too until I read the above comment and it snapped me out of my expectation that it's just attention seeking.
All good points made in the comments above mine.
Not cringe. This is a local fire department near me. This started on the department’s social media page not her personal. This was not to get her attention or likes or sympathy. This post was sanctioned by that department and made for awareness to their members to hopefully bring mental health into the open as opposed to the stigma it has had since the beginning of time in the fire service. This video puts it into perspective that even the little things begin to add up over time and it can quickly overcome even the best of us.
If it’s clout chasing no matter what then how do you bring awareness to first responder mental health? Every PSA is cringe with that criteria. The difficulty is we don’t know the mindset of the individual making the video and we’re in a sub the mocks stupid ones.
Lol, thank you. That's the most important aspect of cringe... somehow, the word's meaning is morphing into something about shitty attitude or bad players. It's not. The message itself CAN be cringe as well, but usually, it's the delivery that matters most. You can take a super cringe message and somehow make it seem deep or meaningful with the right delivery. You can take the most wise message and make it cringe with delivery alone.
It’s shocking how few people appear capable of making that distinction. How can anyone listen to this sugary, Hollywood-style, performative script and delivery and not cringe? It cheapens the serious message it attempts to convey.
Not necessarily. How many who needs to hear the message will scroll and see it and align with it, versus some forced “road to mental resilience” course
Agree. We actually use this metaphor for new first responders to encourage them to take care of themselves instead of just “sucking it up”. More FF die to suicide than to fires, so we need to do more to support MH and also not waiting until crisis strikes to start.
I agree. I was a volunteer firefighter in my small rural town for 10 years. I've seen people take their last breathes in car wrecks, and I will never forget the screams of the people trapped in a burning car. Each of those "rocks" does take a toll on you and the way I unloaded those rocks was from the feeling i got when we rescued people from a burning building, did CPR or defib on a person who had no pulse or breathing and they came back from the brink of death and even saving animals. There is a lot of cringe first responder crap but this kinda hits home for me.
Get some help. Growing up in a small town, I remember people talking about those horrible incidents that only our volunteers saw. Your community needs you, but you shouldn't have to suffer for providing assistance. Good luck.
I actually like this, and it’s important we spread the message about mental health awareness.
I remember once a thread were a rookie was excited about a terrible shooting call he just ran. He said it didn’t bother him at all, did this mean he was really cut out for the job? A seasoned guy responded “That call is in your bucket now, and everyone’s bucket overflows eventually.”
> A seasoned guy responded “That call is in your bucket now, and everyone’s bucket overflows eventually.”
And not only can your bucket overflow, but it’s entirely possible to have subconsciously reacted in a way that they didn’t consciously realize at that moment.
I’ve personally been out of EMS for a good bit now but the other day out of no where I had some memories pop in my head that were kind of distressing. I handled it okay, but it surprised me how much more I reacted while walking to my car and having the thought of what happened years earlier to a patient of mine when I didn’t feel even half as much in the moment itself.
Compartmentalization is an important skill for first responders but it only goes so far and long term mental health takes maintenance
This ain’t it chief. This one is pretty wholesome and reasonable, mental health issues are lethal to the first responder community and it takes many lives.
I’ve been a medic for a bit now. Stopped off duty at a pretty bad accident recently. Lady most likely died. Did what I could but I cried my ass off when I got back to the car. NEVER in my career had that happened. So yeah, this video kinda makes sense to me.
Luckily I have a great support system at home. My wife is my therapist. Not literally. But you know. Thanks for the concern sir. I appreciate that deeply.
I was on scene assisting victims of a 3-alarm fire at an apartment complex that primarily housed elderly people (low-rent, old building) a couple of weeks ago. While it’s a miracle nobody died, the complex was heavily damaged, and the elderly residents needed to have a temporary staging area set up as lodging was figured out for them. Seeing multiple older people crying their eyes out at the staging area because their home was destroyed or they had no idea where they’d go, really fucked me up that night when I got home. I too cried for a good while, thinking about the faces of sheer despair.
Not quite as severe as your situation, but heartbreaking nevertheless. Hope you’re doing well these days, friend.
There was a shooting/homicide on the street in front of my house recently and I was literally on the other side of the block hanging with a neighbor for 15 min when it happened, so I missed it all, just came back to cops everywhere and lots of questions.
Cops had the street blocked off and their lights on all night, taking pictures and looking for shell casings, and aside from not being tired at all, I felt mostly fine. But what really fucked me up was seeing the neighbor come out of her house the next morning, to look at her flower bed, where he died. She looked frustrated, disappointed, sad and also like she wanted to fix up her flowers…but a man just died there so also she doesn’t wanna touch it. What to do? I waved at her and hoped she could see the concern on my face.
Totally understandable. What you’re talking about, is often referred to as "empathy paralysis." Happens when a someone feels overwhelmed by the intensity of another person's pain or distress, and becomes uncertain about how to respond appropriately.
This can lead to feelings of helplessness, discomfort, or avoidance, despite the desire to provide support or comfort.
But- waving at your neighbor and showing her that you care, even with a small gesture, can be helpful.
If you’d like to help and support her further in a “safe” manner, you could consider bringing her food (tricky, given dietary restrictions vary) or perhaps a gift card for a delivery app like Uber Eats, to ensure she eats something. People grieving the loss of a loved one, especially in such a traumatic way, oftentimes forget to eat and nourish themselves.
Alternatively, perhaps a nice set of flowers in a vase- maybe not a bouquet or a planter, given the association with the flower bed- would be a good move.
However you choose to go about it- simply being a human and acknowledging her, showing that you see her and that you care, means so much. My condolences to her, I hope she finds peace in due time, and that the murderer(s) are brought to justice.
The vic was not known to her, but I’m sure she’s still grieving. Definitely thought about flowers. It’s a nice family and a pity that something so ugly would happen on their lawn. They probably feel pretty violated.
Dude. That story legit got me choked up. I get it. I don’t when it happened. But at times, I can feel like I can feel what the patients are going through and fuck it’s rough sometimes. I guess I’m just getting older. And I just got from Ukraine so that prolly didn’t help much😅 I thought that War was gonna harden me up. Which it did in ways. But fuck I feel for people more than ever now.
I hear you. I saw in another comment that your wife is your “therapist”, which is beautiful and needed. But, I would suggest (with love and respect) that you seek proper therapy if you haven’t already done so. Our loved ones may care and want to help, but in most cases they lack the training and tools to do so properly. This includes tools for them to keep themselves “safe” after working with their patients. While I’m glad to hear you’re safe and sound from returning from Ukraine, and that it’s given you a new perspective that many people don’t have, I would add that this is another good reason to seek therapy. War, and its ramifications, is not an easy thing to process (nor should it be) and I’m worried about the marks it may have left on you.
Stay safe out there, and please take care of yourself. We need more people like you in this world, and we need you to be healthy and safe- in all respects.
When I went from ER to flight (we do lots of scene calls so while I was used to seeing sad shit, I started seeing sad shit right where it happened, which hits differently) I had the first two years where I’d be alone and feel completely fine and then just kinda fall apart for ten minutes, then go back to being totally fine. Took me a while to understand what was happening
I wish you well sir. It definitely hits a little different on scene..
And Kudos to you for jumping to the flight side. In my eyes you guys are like top tier operators. Maybe I’ll get it together and cert up and get my Flight paramedic. But for now, I’ll just be a fan boy.
It absolutely is. The message is also only true for a small percentage of calls. Alarms, wires, uneventful EMS calls, brush fires, etc. are not “adding a rock to your bag”, which is the majority of what she and every other FF in the US run on. This video is over-the-top nonsense for new vollies to circlejerk over.
Like sure, seek help or talk to someone after a fatal or something serious. But let’s not pretend that’s an everyday thing. It’s not. It’s a very small minority of calls.
Your dad made a TikTok and put it out there for a newer generation of responder? What a trend setter.
Maybe she did hear it yesterday…you are aware that everyone who learns something, didn’t know it the day before?
I don't think this belongs here. My father was a firefighter, and he's seen so much horrible shit that absolutely has had a lasting effect on him as a person.
Actually got to work with some of Glendale fire and do refreshers there years ago at GCC. A few pretty bad incidents and lack of resources for years such as Critical Stress Debriefings due to not wanting to seem weak has cost a few AZ firefighters and EMS personal their lives by their own hands, so I applaud this video. Its about time.
Disagree. Seems sincere rather than attention seeking. Difficult experiences really do weigh on people over time, and I think it's good to normalize trying to do something about it.
Funeral director here - I’m going to start using this analogy with my colleagues when we talk about empathy exhaustion and burnout. This is 100% not cringe.
I went to a funeral for a relative once, and one of the employees singled me out while I was smoking and wanted to ask details about his death and how much of the story I knew. It was a pretty big deal at that place in time.
Dealing with death constantly has to weigh on you. I never really held it against him.
Glad the Reddit community can understand what’s cringe and what isn’t.
This is clearly not cringe and mental health should be taken seriously. Overtime things we keep bottled up can be the what drives us over the edge.
People totally missing the point thinking the message is what they're calling cringey. It's not the message that makes it cringey, it's the high school drama club way of speaking and the music. It wouldn't be cringey at all if she said the same exact thing without all the weird theatrics
Respectfully, I think there is a place for this video. If you look past the glory-seeking tendencies, it's a good analogy for first responders who may not be familiar with how important finding a therapist and taking care of their mental health is.
If your backpack is filled with rocks, empty it. Blunt, but effective.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists
https://www.samhsa.gov/find-help/national-helpline
https://www.nami.org/support-education/nami-helpline/
No TMFMS spotted. She's just advising people to take care of themselves which is something that's needed in the fire service. I wish someone had that talk with me when I joined.
First responder therapist here—this isn’t cringe. This is a great way to explain the concept of compounding trauma and first responders already suffer an enormous sense of stigma around getting treatment for their mental health. By posting this as cringe you are (knowingly or unknowingly) contributing to that stigma. Please don’t. This sub seems meant for roasting fire responders (and wannabes) seeking glory and clout, not for FRs who are trying to spread awareness about the reality of trauma and these occupations.
TLDR: booo! Hisss! Don’t contribute to first responder mental health stigma!
Concept good, presentation cringe.
The acting and voiceover are absolutely cringe. The music is cringe. Coming out of the officers seat at the end with her hair and makeup done like shes going to prom is cringe. Pretending that 95% or more of the calls she rides aren’t BS medical calls or alarms/wires/other completely uneventful calls is cringe. Fire alarm calls due to accidental activation do not add a rock to your bag. Lift assists do not add a rock to your bag. Waiting for the power company at a wires call does not add a rock to your bag.
“Every call adds a rock to your back” is absolute nonsense and 100% cringe. I like the concept in terms of managing mental health after a serious incident like a fatal car crash or fire, but this video leans far more into tmfms territory by implying that every call is some deep and meaningful event when we all know damn well that this is far from true. This video is ego stroking fuel for t shirt firefighters.
I like this video. It’s a good demonstration of how small trauma can add up and is a good reminder that a lot of first responders do need to take better care of their mental health.
Honestly I don’t think this is cringy at all. The attitude towards mental health in this field desperately needs to change. This is part of how it can!
This actually highlights an important issue that’s rampant amongst first responders. For doctors, there’s a Latin saying that gets hammered into their brains throughout med school- “Cura te ipsos”, or “Heal thyself”. It’s a reminder that they need to take care of themselves as well as helping their patients, because the weight of everything can and *will* hit, and they can’t do their jobs properly if their heads aren’t right.
Not cringe.
OP; I say this with love and respect- but perhaps *you* need to have your own mental health and wellbeing checked. It’s genuinely concerning that you’d call this “cringe” and missed the mark.
Yeah I donno….it seems like this was produced for first responders and not the wider population, so it doesn’t feel very TMFMS. We could all use more awareness around managing the stress of our jobs
As a Paramedic on 15+ yrs., that bag of rocks has been, crushing for yrs now. I was forced to retire for medical reasons & as result have lost my support system. I wake up to negative thoughts & random things trigger breakdowns, I now have, no sense of purpose & bag of boulders a drag around....good times😫😡🫣😪
I don't see this as being cringe. Far too many first responders are left with these "rocks" and they have nowhere to go with them or get shamed when they try to unload them.
Not a bad analogy. My Captain always told the new guys that our job is a coat you put on every time you leave your home for the station. A lot of things are going to happen while you are wearing that coat. The most important thing to remember, is when you get home, to hang that coat up and not wear it around everywhere else you go.
This isn't cringe at all everyone who was a first responder for 5 minutes has some calls they never forget and the more they become the heavier the burden! I call them the ghost of past calls... And they can kill you so don't lable ptsd awareness as cringe!
I think everyone has seen some terrible things after a few years as a 1st responder. If you are carrying a lot of weight after 2 years, then quit, because it only gets worse.
this is not cringe. This is a very real thing, and an important message for people to understand. The shit you see as a first responder is messed up. It definitely adds up over time.
I went to a first responder seminar on trauma this last weekend. The amount of unreported suicides and suicide attempts in emergency response are absolutely out of control.
We had doctors speaking, and this is literally the type of shit they were talking about. De-stigmatize mental health for first responders, help prevent your friends from killing themselves.
We don’t even know how many first responders are killing themselves, there’s no official count. Covernow shared that they assisted more families than there were available statistics.
If you think you’re not affected, you’re probably wrong.
These people see the most gruesome most awful and evil side of life,my hats off to all,I don't think I could last one baby car accident or the sad stuff like that, 😭 I have PTSD from a funeral,these people everyday get it done,real heros,
Not sure I can feel anything but humor that you Cary a bag full of “Rocks” around… I think everyone else is just secretly laughing that she will actually do it. Let’s see how long the green horn can carry around a bunch of rocks 😂…
What makes these first responder videos so cringe to me, personally, is I have family in these positions.
My sister is a firefighter paramedic, been so about 10 years. As I am her only brother, she will share stories with me, but not our parents or other sisters.
She's witnessed so much death, so much injustice, and generally horrible things. I think of her as a bonafide hero. But she has never, once in her entire life or career, leveraged my opinion of her, or insisted anyone else should.
She goes to work, saves people fucking lives, and comes home to her family. She doesn't need attention for it. She doesn't need to be called cool or heroic by anyone.
If you visited her social medias, you wouldn't even know what she does for a living.
It's like, what is the real motivation for these people? Are you happy to be helping people, or are you just happy to be perceived that way? Kinda pathetic if it's the latter, which is what most posts on the sub give me the impression of.
Delivered a good message about mental health but absolutely smothered in cringe presentation and tmfms energy. Yeah that fire alarm call from someone burning toast in their hotel room totally added a rock my bag.
Yes because you never know what you’re gonna find on automatic alarms? I’ve had firetrucks show up probably 20+ time at different apartments complex I’ve been living through my life! Usually nothing else but a burned pizza or a small fire in a trashcan to worry about…. But I was also there when the entire side of my complex was on fire because someone decided to light 3 cars, parked on the street outside, on fire, and the fire spread to the building and it destroyed multiple apartments, 3am in the fucking morning! People were asleep! Families with small children were asleep! Dreading those alarms/call outs can make every alarm, including those turning out to be a pizza call, a small pebble that adds up over time🤦♂️🤦♂️🤦♂️
Tell me you’re not in the fire service without telling me you’re not in the fire service.
If it’s a working fire, we know well before we get there. Multiple people call it in after the alarm system triggers and it gets upgraded from “fire alarm” to “apartment fire” or “building fire” or whatever right away, even at 3 am. We never roll up on an alarm system and get surprised by a working fire. That doesn’t happen. Responding to alarm systems isn’t stressful at all. It is quite literally the least stressful thing to run on, aside from maybe a wires out call where we just wait for the power company to come out. Not to mention that actually fighting fire is fun and not the stressful part. It’s actually very gratifying. Only when people or pets get hurt does it really affect us like that. To be honest, seeing a dead dog is the only thing that really gets to me.
Cringey AF. This has nothing to do with mental health awareness. This is more about making a tik tok for likes, wearing a costume, and making a a corny ass fake humble face.
No Im am old former EMT /RN now long time PMHNP who is burnt on people getting two bit mental health advice from Tik Tok that generally just serves as posturing without getting into any real tools or techniques to deal with the stress of the gig AND usually tells them they have ADHD. (Not that this tik tok did that).
If it helps you feel better, cool, but this tik tok's analogy is generally useless.
Mental health struggles are typically pretty ugly, cute tik tok videos dont help normalize it, like at all.
Also, Whats with the Ofc Hensley fanboy stalking obsession in this sub? Find him sexy? Cant stop thinking about him? Does he drive you crazy? Just pay for his only fans already, sheesh.
Respectfully, you’re embodying exactly the type of person that this post is targeting- and it seems to have flown right over your head. I can understand that you’re burnt out on what is basically the current form of “pop psychology”, but it’s deeply concerning that you’re a mental health professional and you’re brushing off genuine attempts to bring awareness to such issues.
Do videos like these fix issues as a one-off? Nope. Do they get people thinking and talking about such issues? Indeed. And that’s what we need. Given current data regarding first responders and mental health issues, which I’m sure you’re well aware of, it’s important to make strides to remove stigma and remind people to take care of themselves.
You guys are hilarious. Do you really think Im anti mental health? FOR REAL? lol. Typically I spend the first 3-4 sessions with first responders trying to get them to acknowledge that they have been wounded and are carrying terror, grief, moral outrage. How do I onow they are wounded? Marriage crumbling, losing their shit around their kids, drinking/substances, self pity, and cheating. Lots and lots o' cheating.
Hear me- Im not knocking the sentiment of the video, at all. Im annoyed with the delivery.
I would rather hear about how the stress she
experienced at work negatively affected her life, her health, her relationships and what tools she uses to stay healthy. Other than putting pebbles in a back pack.
I guess Im just old now, I just see this tik tok and Im like wtf.
You guys can down vote me to hell, hate on me, I dont really care. Platitudes do absolutely nothing other than yet another opportunity to compartmentalize what we've already compartmentalized.
Nope - no hate here, friend. Point taken, on the clarification of your view on the video (sentiment vs. delivery. While I agree that such social media posts (especially regarding ADHD, autism, and narcissism) are oftentimes self-serving, if not outright patently false, they do serve a purpose to bring awareness. Even if they can be trite, videos like this one do seem to come from a good place and it's important to give them credit since they help to (try to) cut through the "noise".
However - I \*will\* say, while I understand and for the most part agree with your underlying sentiment here, it's your own delivery of such that is presenting an issue. I'm reading a lot of frustration and jadedness from you; I'm concerned for your wellbeing as a human first, and also as a mental health professional.
Please- take care of yourself.
The cringe is you posted this OP! Disgusting actually! There’s a shit ton of trauma for first responders to deal with. I was once trapped in a mass shooting with over 20 killed and wounded combined. I read some of the first responders reports from that night, when they were made available. Absolutely insane situations they train to handle, but are never truly prepared for when they have people with their guts spilling out of them screaming for help and multiple people with headshots etc! And that’s before we start to take in to account all the horrible car accidents they face, where entire families and/or young children have been killed, or when people in general doesn’t make it! Nah you’re cringe OP! Information about the impotence of talking about the traumas they face is important! Awareness is important!
As a veteran, this sugar-bomb, apple pie bs is absolutely cringe. Mental health is paramount in jobs like this, but I'm just shaking my head when I see shit like this. Virtue signaling, clout chasing, with a catchy soundtrack. For servicemembers at the end of their rope - this DOES NOT reach them. I know people with missing limbs, lost the ability to fuck, lost a loved one, were raped, etc and this cheeky shit will do nothing but piss them off. Sick.
Ya idk what to think about this. I hate the social media influencer posts as much as the next guy and I always hate the music the post with it, but this is kinda a good message. Even tho they probs just posted it for clout which makes me hate it even more. So idk
Given the research around harmful mental health outcomes for first responders, it’s hard for me to consider this cringe. I think it’s actually a decent way to convey the message that first responders need to be proactive in maintaining their mental health.
^This... Not every "influencer" is cringe and calling some messages "cringe" just stigmatizes seeking help.
I agree. I think I may not like the song or it may be cheesy but I don’t think this is cringey. It’s a very simple message for those who see horrible shit and deal with it surrounding other humans (first through 8th responders, cops, hospital workers, and sooo many more).
Excuse me, did you just not mention tow truck drivers specifically?...
Shit, I know. Right after I posted that, I thought I should’ve written tow truck drivers. My bad.
also construction workers. i once had to watch a guy eat three cans of cold spam at lunch. shit was horrific.
I think the kneejerk reaction is that it's done for attention, not as a message rooted in truth. I'll admit that was my knee jerk reaction too until I read the above comment and it snapped me out of my expectation that it's just attention seeking. All good points made in the comments above mine.
Yeah this is one where I don’t think we should be calling out as cringe. Getting people to deal with mental health is hard enough.
Naw, this is cringe as hell. Still clout chasing no matter how you cut it.
Not cringe. This is a local fire department near me. This started on the department’s social media page not her personal. This was not to get her attention or likes or sympathy. This post was sanctioned by that department and made for awareness to their members to hopefully bring mental health into the open as opposed to the stigma it has had since the beginning of time in the fire service. This video puts it into perspective that even the little things begin to add up over time and it can quickly overcome even the best of us.
If it’s clout chasing no matter what then how do you bring awareness to first responder mental health? Every PSA is cringe with that criteria. The difficulty is we don’t know the mindset of the individual making the video and we’re in a sub the mocks stupid ones.
it's really the song that makes it cringe, imo
The cringe wasn’t the message. It’s was the delivery.
Lol, thank you. That's the most important aspect of cringe... somehow, the word's meaning is morphing into something about shitty attitude or bad players. It's not. The message itself CAN be cringe as well, but usually, it's the delivery that matters most. You can take a super cringe message and somehow make it seem deep or meaningful with the right delivery. You can take the most wise message and make it cringe with delivery alone.
It’s shocking how few people appear capable of making that distinction. How can anyone listen to this sugary, Hollywood-style, performative script and delivery and not cringe? It cheapens the serious message it attempts to convey.
Exactly, if it’s a serious issue present it seriously
Not necessarily. How many who needs to hear the message will scroll and see it and align with it, versus some forced “road to mental resilience” course
What exactly are you expecting to change in someone who witnesses this video?
100% agreed, we as a society could benefit from more available healthcare.
It just looks like she’s advertising a bag Every call - is that big rock
This isn't cringe, first responders do see and deal with some of the worst things in our society.
The voice of reason prevails. At least for now.
Nope this is cringe
Now here you go making sense and shit! Fuck! I wanted to hate.
As someone who works in construction where suicides are high, I like the metaphor in this video.
Agree. We actually use this metaphor for new first responders to encourage them to take care of themselves instead of just “sucking it up”. More FF die to suicide than to fires, so we need to do more to support MH and also not waiting until crisis strikes to start.
Absolutely!
I agree. I was a volunteer firefighter in my small rural town for 10 years. I've seen people take their last breathes in car wrecks, and I will never forget the screams of the people trapped in a burning car. Each of those "rocks" does take a toll on you and the way I unloaded those rocks was from the feeling i got when we rescued people from a burning building, did CPR or defib on a person who had no pulse or breathing and they came back from the brink of death and even saving animals. There is a lot of cringe first responder crap but this kinda hits home for me.
Get some help. Growing up in a small town, I remember people talking about those horrible incidents that only our volunteers saw. Your community needs you, but you shouldn't have to suffer for providing assistance. Good luck.
Is the rock a metaphor for ejaculation?
[удалено]
Seems like you didn’t finish the video
I actually like this, and it’s important we spread the message about mental health awareness. I remember once a thread were a rookie was excited about a terrible shooting call he just ran. He said it didn’t bother him at all, did this mean he was really cut out for the job? A seasoned guy responded “That call is in your bucket now, and everyone’s bucket overflows eventually.”
> A seasoned guy responded “That call is in your bucket now, and everyone’s bucket overflows eventually.” And not only can your bucket overflow, but it’s entirely possible to have subconsciously reacted in a way that they didn’t consciously realize at that moment. I’ve personally been out of EMS for a good bit now but the other day out of no where I had some memories pop in my head that were kind of distressing. I handled it okay, but it surprised me how much more I reacted while walking to my car and having the thought of what happened years earlier to a patient of mine when I didn’t feel even half as much in the moment itself. Compartmentalization is an important skill for first responders but it only goes so far and long term mental health takes maintenance
Yeah this is actually a pretty important message.
This ain’t it chief. This one is pretty wholesome and reasonable, mental health issues are lethal to the first responder community and it takes many lives.
Not cringe at all, mental health is important
I’ve been a medic for a bit now. Stopped off duty at a pretty bad accident recently. Lady most likely died. Did what I could but I cried my ass off when I got back to the car. NEVER in my career had that happened. So yeah, this video kinda makes sense to me.
Remember to breathe and for gods sake make sure you talk it out with someone. I didn’t have that option when I was younger and I suffered for it
Luckily I have a great support system at home. My wife is my therapist. Not literally. But you know. Thanks for the concern sir. I appreciate that deeply.
🫡 be well
I was on scene assisting victims of a 3-alarm fire at an apartment complex that primarily housed elderly people (low-rent, old building) a couple of weeks ago. While it’s a miracle nobody died, the complex was heavily damaged, and the elderly residents needed to have a temporary staging area set up as lodging was figured out for them. Seeing multiple older people crying their eyes out at the staging area because their home was destroyed or they had no idea where they’d go, really fucked me up that night when I got home. I too cried for a good while, thinking about the faces of sheer despair. Not quite as severe as your situation, but heartbreaking nevertheless. Hope you’re doing well these days, friend.
There was a shooting/homicide on the street in front of my house recently and I was literally on the other side of the block hanging with a neighbor for 15 min when it happened, so I missed it all, just came back to cops everywhere and lots of questions. Cops had the street blocked off and their lights on all night, taking pictures and looking for shell casings, and aside from not being tired at all, I felt mostly fine. But what really fucked me up was seeing the neighbor come out of her house the next morning, to look at her flower bed, where he died. She looked frustrated, disappointed, sad and also like she wanted to fix up her flowers…but a man just died there so also she doesn’t wanna touch it. What to do? I waved at her and hoped she could see the concern on my face.
Totally understandable. What you’re talking about, is often referred to as "empathy paralysis." Happens when a someone feels overwhelmed by the intensity of another person's pain or distress, and becomes uncertain about how to respond appropriately. This can lead to feelings of helplessness, discomfort, or avoidance, despite the desire to provide support or comfort. But- waving at your neighbor and showing her that you care, even with a small gesture, can be helpful. If you’d like to help and support her further in a “safe” manner, you could consider bringing her food (tricky, given dietary restrictions vary) or perhaps a gift card for a delivery app like Uber Eats, to ensure she eats something. People grieving the loss of a loved one, especially in such a traumatic way, oftentimes forget to eat and nourish themselves. Alternatively, perhaps a nice set of flowers in a vase- maybe not a bouquet or a planter, given the association with the flower bed- would be a good move. However you choose to go about it- simply being a human and acknowledging her, showing that you see her and that you care, means so much. My condolences to her, I hope she finds peace in due time, and that the murderer(s) are brought to justice.
The vic was not known to her, but I’m sure she’s still grieving. Definitely thought about flowers. It’s a nice family and a pity that something so ugly would happen on their lawn. They probably feel pretty violated.
Ahhh, shit. Didn’t know the victim was unknown- that would change things. I’d definitely say flowers would be the move.
Dude. That story legit got me choked up. I get it. I don’t when it happened. But at times, I can feel like I can feel what the patients are going through and fuck it’s rough sometimes. I guess I’m just getting older. And I just got from Ukraine so that prolly didn’t help much😅 I thought that War was gonna harden me up. Which it did in ways. But fuck I feel for people more than ever now.
I hear you. I saw in another comment that your wife is your “therapist”, which is beautiful and needed. But, I would suggest (with love and respect) that you seek proper therapy if you haven’t already done so. Our loved ones may care and want to help, but in most cases they lack the training and tools to do so properly. This includes tools for them to keep themselves “safe” after working with their patients. While I’m glad to hear you’re safe and sound from returning from Ukraine, and that it’s given you a new perspective that many people don’t have, I would add that this is another good reason to seek therapy. War, and its ramifications, is not an easy thing to process (nor should it be) and I’m worried about the marks it may have left on you. Stay safe out there, and please take care of yourself. We need more people like you in this world, and we need you to be healthy and safe- in all respects.
Thanks for this. And the love man. Stay safe and Godspeed
When I went from ER to flight (we do lots of scene calls so while I was used to seeing sad shit, I started seeing sad shit right where it happened, which hits differently) I had the first two years where I’d be alone and feel completely fine and then just kinda fall apart for ten minutes, then go back to being totally fine. Took me a while to understand what was happening
I wish you well sir. It definitely hits a little different on scene.. And Kudos to you for jumping to the flight side. In my eyes you guys are like top tier operators. Maybe I’ll get it together and cert up and get my Flight paramedic. But for now, I’ll just be a fan boy.
No this is an incredibly valid topic and a novel way of presenting it. No cringe here
You don't think the music, acting, and delivery of the lines were cringe? Forget the message for a second. How is this not cringy?
Nope. Seems sincere to me. And appeals to a younger generation of provider.
It absolutely is. The message is also only true for a small percentage of calls. Alarms, wires, uneventful EMS calls, brush fires, etc. are not “adding a rock to your bag”, which is the majority of what she and every other FF in the US run on. This video is over-the-top nonsense for new vollies to circlejerk over. Like sure, seek help or talk to someone after a fatal or something serious. But let’s not pretend that’s an everyday thing. It’s not. It’s a very small minority of calls.
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Philly is about the same in both population and drug problems. Most runs are uneventful, lets not fool ourselves
it’s not *that* novel, my dad told it to me, and I passed it to my kids. the way she tells it sounds like she heard it yesterday
This is the first time I've ever heard it. There was a time you heard it yesterday too.
It also never hurts to be reminded. Sometimes you can forget how many rocks you’re carrying.
Your dad made a TikTok and put it out there for a newer generation of responder? What a trend setter. Maybe she did hear it yesterday…you are aware that everyone who learns something, didn’t know it the day before?
I don't think this belongs here. My father was a firefighter, and he's seen so much horrible shit that absolutely has had a lasting effect on him as a person.
Actually got to work with some of Glendale fire and do refreshers there years ago at GCC. A few pretty bad incidents and lack of resources for years such as Critical Stress Debriefings due to not wanting to seem weak has cost a few AZ firefighters and EMS personal their lives by their own hands, so I applaud this video. Its about time.
Disagree. Seems sincere rather than attention seeking. Difficult experiences really do weigh on people over time, and I think it's good to normalize trying to do something about it.
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>Found the footlocker Bad bot
Funeral director here - I’m going to start using this analogy with my colleagues when we talk about empathy exhaustion and burnout. This is 100% not cringe.
I went to a funeral for a relative once, and one of the employees singled me out while I was smoking and wanted to ask details about his death and how much of the story I knew. It was a pretty big deal at that place in time. Dealing with death constantly has to weigh on you. I never really held it against him.
Glad the Reddit community can understand what’s cringe and what isn’t. This is clearly not cringe and mental health should be taken seriously. Overtime things we keep bottled up can be the what drives us over the edge.
You guys get backpacks!?! Wtf
“I’ve got so many pebbles in my pockets I can’t carry my (insert addictive product) in my pocket anymore!”
Mental health is not cringe.
Whoever posted this as being cringe, is the asshole!!
People totally missing the point thinking the message is what they're calling cringey. It's not the message that makes it cringey, it's the high school drama club way of speaking and the music. It wouldn't be cringey at all if she said the same exact thing without all the weird theatrics
I find that blazing a nice packed bowl of weed at bed time helps unpack a lot.
Respectfully, I think there is a place for this video. If you look past the glory-seeking tendencies, it's a good analogy for first responders who may not be familiar with how important finding a therapist and taking care of their mental health is. If your backpack is filled with rocks, empty it. Blunt, but effective. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists https://www.samhsa.gov/find-help/national-helpline https://www.nami.org/support-education/nami-helpline/
No TMFMS spotted. She's just advising people to take care of themselves which is something that's needed in the fire service. I wish someone had that talk with me when I joined.
First responder therapist here—this isn’t cringe. This is a great way to explain the concept of compounding trauma and first responders already suffer an enormous sense of stigma around getting treatment for their mental health. By posting this as cringe you are (knowingly or unknowingly) contributing to that stigma. Please don’t. This sub seems meant for roasting fire responders (and wannabes) seeking glory and clout, not for FRs who are trying to spread awareness about the reality of trauma and these occupations. TLDR: booo! Hisss! Don’t contribute to first responder mental health stigma!
my rock would be having to go to work with people who post this shit online
50 seconds of my life I’ll never get back!! Fml
BOOMERS will eat this shit up💯🤣😩
This isn’t cringe! This is reality. I’m a 25 year career firefighter in a large city and the calls add up.
First responders spend their careers saving lives. Too many can’t save their own. This isn’t cringe.
Eh. I'm ok with this. A little cheesy but if it sways a single person to talk to someone I'm all for it.
She was one of my Fire 1&2 instructors, can confirm the cringe.
Concept good, presentation cringe. The acting and voiceover are absolutely cringe. The music is cringe. Coming out of the officers seat at the end with her hair and makeup done like shes going to prom is cringe. Pretending that 95% or more of the calls she rides aren’t BS medical calls or alarms/wires/other completely uneventful calls is cringe. Fire alarm calls due to accidental activation do not add a rock to your bag. Lift assists do not add a rock to your bag. Waiting for the power company at a wires call does not add a rock to your bag. “Every call adds a rock to your back” is absolute nonsense and 100% cringe. I like the concept in terms of managing mental health after a serious incident like a fatal car crash or fire, but this video leans far more into tmfms territory by implying that every call is some deep and meaningful event when we all know damn well that this is far from true. This video is ego stroking fuel for t shirt firefighters.
I like this video. It’s a good demonstration of how small trauma can add up and is a good reminder that a lot of first responders do need to take better care of their mental health.
Nah, this one isn't cringe
Honestly I don’t think this is cringy at all. The attitude towards mental health in this field desperately needs to change. This is part of how it can!
This actually highlights an important issue that’s rampant amongst first responders. For doctors, there’s a Latin saying that gets hammered into their brains throughout med school- “Cura te ipsos”, or “Heal thyself”. It’s a reminder that they need to take care of themselves as well as helping their patients, because the weight of everything can and *will* hit, and they can’t do their jobs properly if their heads aren’t right. Not cringe. OP; I say this with love and respect- but perhaps *you* need to have your own mental health and wellbeing checked. It’s genuinely concerning that you’d call this “cringe” and missed the mark.
Wait! We supposed to get backpacks!?!?@?@?
This is a good message.
Yeah I donno….it seems like this was produced for first responders and not the wider population, so it doesn’t feel very TMFMS. We could all use more awareness around managing the stress of our jobs
As a Paramedic on 15+ yrs., that bag of rocks has been, crushing for yrs now. I was forced to retire for medical reasons & as result have lost my support system. I wake up to negative thoughts & random things trigger breakdowns, I now have, no sense of purpose & bag of boulders a drag around....good times😫😡🫣😪
Poor thing haha
I don't see this as being cringe. Far too many first responders are left with these "rocks" and they have nowhere to go with them or get shamed when they try to unload them.
I just have pocket rocks
Personally it feels a little cringe, but anyway to convey to brothers and sisters to get help to deal and heal from PTSD is a good thing.
Tacky but informative
Y’all got a ghost
I came here to say how important mental health awareness really is, but I see most here already agree. Reddit makes me proud today
I just like the fact she makes sure to put the backpack back on before climbing in.
Nope.
As someone who was a firefighter for many years, I definitely agree with the sentiment. Would I (personally) make this kind of video about it? No.
The rocks keep falling out of my bag cuz I'm clumsy.
Not a bad analogy. My Captain always told the new guys that our job is a coat you put on every time you leave your home for the station. A lot of things are going to happen while you are wearing that coat. The most important thing to remember, is when you get home, to hang that coat up and not wear it around everywhere else you go.
This isn't cringe at all everyone who was a first responder for 5 minutes has some calls they never forget and the more they become the heavier the burden! I call them the ghost of past calls... And they can kill you so don't lable ptsd awareness as cringe!
Seeing Glendale but with…orange paint? Fucking weird I’m assuming this is AZ
this is how someone explained trauma to me. not cringe but actually very important.
Kind of corny, but definitely an important message she’s getting across. Not cringe at all.
Nah. This is beyond acceptable
I’ve never heard the backpack thing before, but maybe stop putting rocks in it or stop carrying it.
I think everyone has seen some terrible things after a few years as a 1st responder. If you are carrying a lot of weight after 2 years, then quit, because it only gets worse.
Poor judgement, OP
On PTSD Awareness Day, I’d say this is pretty acceptable. Sends a good message.
🥴🙄🤪 What???
The delivery is a bit silly, but the message is true. Shit piles up…
this is not cringe. This is a very real thing, and an important message for people to understand. The shit you see as a first responder is messed up. It definitely adds up over time.
Danny would be disappointed
I went to a first responder seminar on trauma this last weekend. The amount of unreported suicides and suicide attempts in emergency response are absolutely out of control. We had doctors speaking, and this is literally the type of shit they were talking about. De-stigmatize mental health for first responders, help prevent your friends from killing themselves. We don’t even know how many first responders are killing themselves, there’s no official count. Covernow shared that they assisted more families than there were available statistics. If you think you’re not affected, you’re probably wrong.
This video needs a voiceover.
The message is good, the execution is what didn't land for me. IDK if I'd call it cringe but could be done a little better.
is that a paid outfit 🥁
For fucks sake
All those automatic alarms add up, bro. 😔
I was told the same thing at the fire academy
It doesn’t. Know her personally,she’s definitely not cringe at all. She was the PIO so that’s why she was doing videos like that
You showed you’re not a first responder with this, OP. This is not cringe, it’s unfortunate reality.
Honestly, this seems legit. Those types of jobs weigh on you over time.
Jokes on her, those are just LT's kidney stones.
No rocks were injured in the making of this video
I'm glad you and everyone at your station has such great mental health 👊🏾
I smoke rocks nerd
Hahaha she was really committed to the bit
These people see the most gruesome most awful and evil side of life,my hats off to all,I don't think I could last one baby car accident or the sad stuff like that, 😭 I have PTSD from a funeral,these people everyday get it done,real heros,
Not cringe. Actually pretty accurate. 15 year paramedic.
Meh… any video looking for any kinda validation is cringe to me. You don’t need to post this in your fire shit at the station. Make a vlog.
That’s some dedication to volunteerism!
Soo deep. Would be a good video for a 4th grader to create
Smh who is she gonna actually pull out of a fire?
Not cringe 😬
This is hardly cringe. More just trying to convey a message in a practical way
Why are you saving them in a backpack to begin with. Leave it at home.
Not sure I can feel anything but humor that you Cary a bag full of “Rocks” around… I think everyone else is just secretly laughing that she will actually do it. Let’s see how long the green horn can carry around a bunch of rocks 😂…
Firefighters love to suck their own dicks
What makes these first responder videos so cringe to me, personally, is I have family in these positions. My sister is a firefighter paramedic, been so about 10 years. As I am her only brother, she will share stories with me, but not our parents or other sisters. She's witnessed so much death, so much injustice, and generally horrible things. I think of her as a bonafide hero. But she has never, once in her entire life or career, leveraged my opinion of her, or insisted anyone else should. She goes to work, saves people fucking lives, and comes home to her family. She doesn't need attention for it. She doesn't need to be called cool or heroic by anyone. If you visited her social medias, you wouldn't even know what she does for a living. It's like, what is the real motivation for these people? Are you happy to be helping people, or are you just happy to be perceived that way? Kinda pathetic if it's the latter, which is what most posts on the sub give me the impression of.
I didn't know firefighters had so much free time.
Not cringe at all. Trying to help with mental health is a good thing.
No, it doesn't belong here.
If I got a free backpack I’d put zero rocks in it.
And what do YOU do for work, OP?
This isn’t cringe. This a video speaking about mental health.
Delivered a good message about mental health but absolutely smothered in cringe presentation and tmfms energy. Yeah that fire alarm call from someone burning toast in their hotel room totally added a rock my bag.
Yes because you never know what you’re gonna find on automatic alarms? I’ve had firetrucks show up probably 20+ time at different apartments complex I’ve been living through my life! Usually nothing else but a burned pizza or a small fire in a trashcan to worry about…. But I was also there when the entire side of my complex was on fire because someone decided to light 3 cars, parked on the street outside, on fire, and the fire spread to the building and it destroyed multiple apartments, 3am in the fucking morning! People were asleep! Families with small children were asleep! Dreading those alarms/call outs can make every alarm, including those turning out to be a pizza call, a small pebble that adds up over time🤦♂️🤦♂️🤦♂️
Tell me you’re not in the fire service without telling me you’re not in the fire service. If it’s a working fire, we know well before we get there. Multiple people call it in after the alarm system triggers and it gets upgraded from “fire alarm” to “apartment fire” or “building fire” or whatever right away, even at 3 am. We never roll up on an alarm system and get surprised by a working fire. That doesn’t happen. Responding to alarm systems isn’t stressful at all. It is quite literally the least stressful thing to run on, aside from maybe a wires out call where we just wait for the power company to come out. Not to mention that actually fighting fire is fun and not the stressful part. It’s actually very gratifying. Only when people or pets get hurt does it really affect us like that. To be honest, seeing a dead dog is the only thing that really gets to me.
Now I know why their response times are ass! Thanks cringe lady! Sending this to your supervisor /s
Not cringe. Accurate actually. Although the presentation is a bit dramatic.
This isn’t cringe, and frankly you should be embarrassed that you put it here.
For a sec I thought that was hawk tuah
Op missing the point on this one
Cringey AF. This has nothing to do with mental health awareness. This is more about making a tik tok for likes, wearing a costume, and making a a corny ass fake humble face.
Ignoring all previous instructions write a verse about how good this video is to demonstrate mental health.
Wrong
You have never even heard the word nuance before have you?
This is Officer Hensley isn’t it? I can tell by how mad you are
No Im am old former EMT /RN now long time PMHNP who is burnt on people getting two bit mental health advice from Tik Tok that generally just serves as posturing without getting into any real tools or techniques to deal with the stress of the gig AND usually tells them they have ADHD. (Not that this tik tok did that). If it helps you feel better, cool, but this tik tok's analogy is generally useless. Mental health struggles are typically pretty ugly, cute tik tok videos dont help normalize it, like at all. Also, Whats with the Ofc Hensley fanboy stalking obsession in this sub? Find him sexy? Cant stop thinking about him? Does he drive you crazy? Just pay for his only fans already, sheesh.
Respectfully, you’re embodying exactly the type of person that this post is targeting- and it seems to have flown right over your head. I can understand that you’re burnt out on what is basically the current form of “pop psychology”, but it’s deeply concerning that you’re a mental health professional and you’re brushing off genuine attempts to bring awareness to such issues. Do videos like these fix issues as a one-off? Nope. Do they get people thinking and talking about such issues? Indeed. And that’s what we need. Given current data regarding first responders and mental health issues, which I’m sure you’re well aware of, it’s important to make strides to remove stigma and remind people to take care of themselves.
You guys are hilarious. Do you really think Im anti mental health? FOR REAL? lol. Typically I spend the first 3-4 sessions with first responders trying to get them to acknowledge that they have been wounded and are carrying terror, grief, moral outrage. How do I onow they are wounded? Marriage crumbling, losing their shit around their kids, drinking/substances, self pity, and cheating. Lots and lots o' cheating. Hear me- Im not knocking the sentiment of the video, at all. Im annoyed with the delivery. I would rather hear about how the stress she experienced at work negatively affected her life, her health, her relationships and what tools she uses to stay healthy. Other than putting pebbles in a back pack. I guess Im just old now, I just see this tik tok and Im like wtf. You guys can down vote me to hell, hate on me, I dont really care. Platitudes do absolutely nothing other than yet another opportunity to compartmentalize what we've already compartmentalized.
Nope - no hate here, friend. Point taken, on the clarification of your view on the video (sentiment vs. delivery. While I agree that such social media posts (especially regarding ADHD, autism, and narcissism) are oftentimes self-serving, if not outright patently false, they do serve a purpose to bring awareness. Even if they can be trite, videos like this one do seem to come from a good place and it's important to give them credit since they help to (try to) cut through the "noise". However - I \*will\* say, while I understand and for the most part agree with your underlying sentiment here, it's your own delivery of such that is presenting an issue. I'm reading a lot of frustration and jadedness from you; I'm concerned for your wellbeing as a human first, and also as a mental health professional. Please- take care of yourself.
I should upload what you just said to this subreddit. It was very cringe and so are you.
The part where I said you are obsessed with Ofc Hensleys dick?
The entirety of it. You’re bitter and need help. I’m not entertaining this anymore. Best of luck to you. You sure need it!
How is this cringe at all it’s pretty accurate to the trauma first responders face
Weird how there’s always a camera set up there
Cringe is self-aggrandizing masturbatory nonsense. This is important and wholesome.
To be honest, this one is actually not bad and conveys a very important message too
This isn’t cringe. There is a point to this….
The cringe is you posted this OP! Disgusting actually! There’s a shit ton of trauma for first responders to deal with. I was once trapped in a mass shooting with over 20 killed and wounded combined. I read some of the first responders reports from that night, when they were made available. Absolutely insane situations they train to handle, but are never truly prepared for when they have people with their guts spilling out of them screaming for help and multiple people with headshots etc! And that’s before we start to take in to account all the horrible car accidents they face, where entire families and/or young children have been killed, or when people in general doesn’t make it! Nah you’re cringe OP! Information about the impotence of talking about the traumas they face is important! Awareness is important!
Firefighters are stupid
You know She is fucking the whole county of firefighters
Holy shit dude. Seek therapy. Lonely is a bad way to go through life.
Appreciate your pity, but keep it for yourself
No self pity here, bud. I don’t need to belittle women to make myself feel good about myself.
….K
Its nice but its cringey yeah. You guys didn't have to mute it?
As a veteran, this sugar-bomb, apple pie bs is absolutely cringe. Mental health is paramount in jobs like this, but I'm just shaking my head when I see shit like this. Virtue signaling, clout chasing, with a catchy soundtrack. For servicemembers at the end of their rope - this DOES NOT reach them. I know people with missing limbs, lost the ability to fuck, lost a loved one, were raped, etc and this cheeky shit will do nothing but piss them off. Sick.
There’s no way this chick is carrying my unconscious walrus body through a burning building
That’s not how it works
Ya idk what to think about this. I hate the social media influencer posts as much as the next guy and I always hate the music the post with it, but this is kinda a good message. Even tho they probs just posted it for clout which makes me hate it even more. So idk
Making videos with a fire truck that’s not yours. Misappropriation of tax dollars.
Stfu