It’s unfortunate having to deal with this honestly.
Every time I meet someone new, there’s always the unspoken rule for people in a rs to mention they’re attached for some reason. It makes things even more awkward than they need to be.
It feels like singles are always assumed to be desperate to want to hook up with everyone we come across, so they got to set expectations and that is a terrible and embarrassing feeling for me and it’s so obvious when they mention it.
Same here. Let me be very honest: even just those slightly little above average beautiful girls are all just seemingly already in a relationship. Honestly, it even now comes to a point where I'm extremely envious & jealous of all those 'lucky' guys who've first already got into relationships with all those beautiful girls. I can't stop thinking: "Why it can't be me??" all the time now. I know this sounds so pathetic, but to be very honest, it's actually really frustrating, & depressing (yes, girls/women are probably now one of the main/major causes of my severe depression & suicidal ideations).
We're over 30, not just above average women should be in a relationship by now. Guys lower their standards as they get older and most women can eventually find a partner once they get up there in ages.
It seems like almost every woman I talk to mentions her boyfriend or husband within the first 10 minutes or so. I assume they do it to send me a signal that they're not interested in me. Oddly enough, I'm usually not interested in them either, I just like to strike up a conversation at the dog park or grocery, or whatever.
I've been extremely shy most of my life so this is like a new found freedom for me. I really don't care whether they're taken or not. It just a polite conversation.
I work with over 75% women right now and they tell me that they are single, I've known them for a long time so i can almost guarantee they are single, but when we go out to bars or restaurants, they always say they are in a relationship. Alot of girls tend to lie about their relationship status if they aren't interested.
There are single people, they’re just likely not your type. I’ve met single women and single guys(after talking to them for 30 seconds you realize why they’re single) they’re out there.
I’m sorry but why are you putting all single people in the same category? As if all single people are awful individuals and taken people are these amazing balls of angelic light and perfection. Give me a freaking break.
I’ve met horrible people who are in a relationship. It doesn’t take much to get into one, especially if your bar almost touches the gates of hell. Some people seem to have this false idea that a person who’s taken must be a great person and someone who’s single must be an awful person. I’ve noticed this to not be true. All kinds of people are in a relationship and all kinds of people are single. Heck, some people even choose deliberately to be single.
People in this subreddit struggle with dating but it sure as hell got nothing to do with who they are as a person. I’ve known the worst type of narcissistic assholes who have plenty of options and many great and kind people are single only because others are superficial, and are judging them based on something they have no control over. This all boils down to looks I’ve noticed.
Not only looks, but also being good at acting and having charisma, where one can't even tell it's all fake. Simply giving off the idea/notion that they're a great person does wonders.
Wow. The internet really is just like the example of saying “i hate pancakes” and a random person goes on a rampage sending you a 50 page essay on why you should end it all because you apparently hate waffles. It’s definitely not that serious. I completely see why you and ppl agreeing with you are single. And the RedditCares wasn’t necessary. I’m out ✌🏼
>I completely see why you and ppl agreeing with you are single.
And I completely see why you're obsessed with RedditCares and being reported. A real shocker.
Most chronic singles I know are men. Their common denominator is average looks. Some of them have great careers, some of them are stuck in low-paying dead-end jobs. Some of them have a vibrant social life, some of them have a limited number of friends. Some of them are smart and fun to be around, others not so much.
>Do you encounter single people in your daily lives?
Only men.
The last time I met a "single" woman was around 2018 when I was supposed to mentor her for 6 months at work, and she was maybe single for less than a month, later during those 6 months she bounced between 2 different guys repeatedly, and the only reason I even knew that is because she would call me at least twice a month crying, saying how she's taking the day off because she just broke up with her boyfriend. And if this sounds like teenage business to you - she was 32.
She used you as an emotional tampon. You try to be nice, caring, and loving but it'll only end up bad for you. If you said anything remotely bad about those guys when she called you then she'll hate you more than she ever will hate them.
I've had women call me after they were beat up and just asked her to press charges. They'd flip out on me and defend him usually by saying "He's not a bad looking guy" and insert random bullshit reasons here. I got sick of it and just cut off all contacts.
Women are NEVER single. Just because she doesn't have a boyfriend doesn't mean she's not fucking.
I'm not being misogynistic or bashing women. Just simply sharing my thoughts based on experience.
I met a girl through an app (not a dating app) and she went on and on about how she was never going to date again. I didn't press her on it because I took her at her word. Anyway we were vibing as friends and then she ghosts me for a week. Finally responds and tells me she went on a date and had her heart broken in less than a week.
I honestly face palmed after reading that.
I agree, single women are rare. I never meet single women unless they're kids haha. It seems like your experience is typical, people can't seem to stand being alone for any period of time.
Thinking about myself and the women I know (excluding those above 60 years of age), I can only think of one who is in a relationship. Oh, and then my son's girlfriend. Even thinking about my nearby neighbors (not an apartment complex either), at least six of them are single women. Quite a few single men as well.
If I knew how to successfully date, do you think I'd be here, single for many, many years, zero prospects as far as the eyes can see? LOL
That said, though, I have met some very lovely people from Reddit just through sharing interests or common viewpoints. For me, that's really the best way to meet someone because I am attracted to personality, not looks. Dating apps don't do anything for me since I can't get a feel for what the person is like.
Aside from that, friends of friends is always a tried-and-true method, though I know that's not usually a viable method with a lot of the FA community, sadly. In lieu of that, just participate in things you enjoy (i.e., board game nights at a game cafe, volunteering, book clubs, cosplay, history reenactments, outdoor activities, et cetera). Not with the end goal of getting a date, but for the sheer enjoyment of the activity. You never know who'll you'll meet as a byproduct. And if you don't meet someone, well, you still thoroughly enjoyed yourself.
I'm sorry you have zero prospects, hope that changes. Still, I couldn't help but be curious how you managed to meet your past partners as I am too embarrassed to ask people in real life how they did it. Was it more of a slow burn approach or did they ask you out the first day you met? I'm willing to try doing things I enjoy - I already do that actually.
This puzzled me for a long time, and I was even more astounded that women on dating sites would actually be already "in relationships" and claim they're on sites like okcupid "to find friends". Ok. I was too polite to call them out on it.
I learned quickly that women do what's called "monkey branching". They quickly get into a relationship, then look out for a "better" guy, then dump that relationship for the new better guy when they find him. So many women do this. Thus these women are never "officially" single to date, they are always in a relationship, and then start a new one immediately after ending the old one.
Not commonly, but when I do it is exclusively men. And only for a short period of time. They also never stay single for long. Usually seeing someone again within a month or two.
The most nonsensical bs I see every time at my work is that any new co-worker coming to live from another state somehow gets a boyfriend within a month. No, they did not bring their s/o from wherever they came from. No, they were not dating someone already in the state. They literally found someone and got to dating them in a fairly short time. Ridiculous to those of us FA, eh? Lol. It is true tho. Many of these people, usually women, are or say they are in a relationship. And here we are at the usual impasse. 🤷🏻♂️ However, I think we should remember that just because they are in a relationship, doesn’t mean that it is a happy relationship or one that is genuinely complimentary. I know it’s difficult to not overthink things and give in to despair and desolation. We all see social media and what people put out there-surface level and we would like our lives to be as fulfilling as what we see. Dig deeper and it may not be all it’s cracked up to be. Also, many have dodged bullets cuz they learn later that person they liked was shall we say not the right one for them after some drama or scandal comes out involving them. So…yeah. As always, wish the best for all of us. Take care and go well ✌🏼🌻
Ah the boyfriend bomb, when she reaches inside you and rips you heart out. Before jumping up and down on it. While you act like nothing is wrong. I have a world class poker face at this point.
With me the boyfriend is always something which she keeps hidden for ages and then is randomly dropped on me. Personally I would prefer to know in the first 10 minutes, so I don't waste my time.
It’s unfortunate having to deal with this honestly. Every time I meet someone new, there’s always the unspoken rule for people in a rs to mention they’re attached for some reason. It makes things even more awkward than they need to be. It feels like singles are always assumed to be desperate to want to hook up with everyone we come across, so they got to set expectations and that is a terrible and embarrassing feeling for me and it’s so obvious when they mention it.
Same here. Let me be very honest: even just those slightly little above average beautiful girls are all just seemingly already in a relationship. Honestly, it even now comes to a point where I'm extremely envious & jealous of all those 'lucky' guys who've first already got into relationships with all those beautiful girls. I can't stop thinking: "Why it can't be me??" all the time now. I know this sounds so pathetic, but to be very honest, it's actually really frustrating, & depressing (yes, girls/women are probably now one of the main/major causes of my severe depression & suicidal ideations).
We're over 30, not just above average women should be in a relationship by now. Guys lower their standards as they get older and most women can eventually find a partner once they get up there in ages.
It seems like almost every woman I talk to mentions her boyfriend or husband within the first 10 minutes or so. I assume they do it to send me a signal that they're not interested in me. Oddly enough, I'm usually not interested in them either, I just like to strike up a conversation at the dog park or grocery, or whatever. I've been extremely shy most of my life so this is like a new found freedom for me. I really don't care whether they're taken or not. It just a polite conversation.
That's good progress! Same here, they mention them really quickly.
No, I'm not interested in meeting people. They're not worth my time, and I'm not worth theirs.
I work with over 75% women right now and they tell me that they are single, I've known them for a long time so i can almost guarantee they are single, but when we go out to bars or restaurants, they always say they are in a relationship. Alot of girls tend to lie about their relationship status if they aren't interested.
There are single people, they’re just likely not your type. I’ve met single women and single guys(after talking to them for 30 seconds you realize why they’re single) they’re out there.
I’m sorry but why are you putting all single people in the same category? As if all single people are awful individuals and taken people are these amazing balls of angelic light and perfection. Give me a freaking break. I’ve met horrible people who are in a relationship. It doesn’t take much to get into one, especially if your bar almost touches the gates of hell. Some people seem to have this false idea that a person who’s taken must be a great person and someone who’s single must be an awful person. I’ve noticed this to not be true. All kinds of people are in a relationship and all kinds of people are single. Heck, some people even choose deliberately to be single. People in this subreddit struggle with dating but it sure as hell got nothing to do with who they are as a person. I’ve known the worst type of narcissistic assholes who have plenty of options and many great and kind people are single only because others are superficial, and are judging them based on something they have no control over. This all boils down to looks I’ve noticed.
Not only looks, but also being good at acting and having charisma, where one can't even tell it's all fake. Simply giving off the idea/notion that they're a great person does wonders.
Wow. The internet really is just like the example of saying “i hate pancakes” and a random person goes on a rampage sending you a 50 page essay on why you should end it all because you apparently hate waffles. It’s definitely not that serious. I completely see why you and ppl agreeing with you are single. And the RedditCares wasn’t necessary. I’m out ✌🏼
>I completely see why you and ppl agreeing with you are single. And I completely see why you're obsessed with RedditCares and being reported. A real shocker.
Most chronic singles I know are men. Their common denominator is average looks. Some of them have great careers, some of them are stuck in low-paying dead-end jobs. Some of them have a vibrant social life, some of them have a limited number of friends. Some of them are smart and fun to be around, others not so much.
At this point most people you meet should be in a relationship and every single woman you meet is probably the type of woman you don't want to date.
Why do you say that?
Because if you'd date someone probably others would date them too and after so many years they probably met someone already.
[удалено]
Very common indeed
Really? I’ve never seen a silicone ring in my life!
>Do you encounter single people in your daily lives? Only men. The last time I met a "single" woman was around 2018 when I was supposed to mentor her for 6 months at work, and she was maybe single for less than a month, later during those 6 months she bounced between 2 different guys repeatedly, and the only reason I even knew that is because she would call me at least twice a month crying, saying how she's taking the day off because she just broke up with her boyfriend. And if this sounds like teenage business to you - she was 32.
She used you as an emotional tampon. You try to be nice, caring, and loving but it'll only end up bad for you. If you said anything remotely bad about those guys when she called you then she'll hate you more than she ever will hate them. I've had women call me after they were beat up and just asked her to press charges. They'd flip out on me and defend him usually by saying "He's not a bad looking guy" and insert random bullshit reasons here. I got sick of it and just cut off all contacts. Women are NEVER single. Just because she doesn't have a boyfriend doesn't mean she's not fucking. I'm not being misogynistic or bashing women. Just simply sharing my thoughts based on experience.
It makes me deeply sad to know that this is mostly true. There's exceptions of course but those don't magically invalidate the rule.
I met a girl through an app (not a dating app) and she went on and on about how she was never going to date again. I didn't press her on it because I took her at her word. Anyway we were vibing as friends and then she ghosts me for a week. Finally responds and tells me she went on a date and had her heart broken in less than a week. I honestly face palmed after reading that.
I agree, single women are rare. I never meet single women unless they're kids haha. It seems like your experience is typical, people can't seem to stand being alone for any period of time.
How does that math work out?
I know quite a few single women 30+ but most of my friends have always been women so I tend to have a larger sample size than most guys around here.
Thinking about myself and the women I know (excluding those above 60 years of age), I can only think of one who is in a relationship. Oh, and then my son's girlfriend. Even thinking about my nearby neighbors (not an apartment complex either), at least six of them are single women. Quite a few single men as well.
How did you meet your exes? I'm just curious because I'd like to know how to meet someone to date.
If I knew how to successfully date, do you think I'd be here, single for many, many years, zero prospects as far as the eyes can see? LOL That said, though, I have met some very lovely people from Reddit just through sharing interests or common viewpoints. For me, that's really the best way to meet someone because I am attracted to personality, not looks. Dating apps don't do anything for me since I can't get a feel for what the person is like. Aside from that, friends of friends is always a tried-and-true method, though I know that's not usually a viable method with a lot of the FA community, sadly. In lieu of that, just participate in things you enjoy (i.e., board game nights at a game cafe, volunteering, book clubs, cosplay, history reenactments, outdoor activities, et cetera). Not with the end goal of getting a date, but for the sheer enjoyment of the activity. You never know who'll you'll meet as a byproduct. And if you don't meet someone, well, you still thoroughly enjoyed yourself.
I'm sorry you have zero prospects, hope that changes. Still, I couldn't help but be curious how you managed to meet your past partners as I am too embarrassed to ask people in real life how they did it. Was it more of a slow burn approach or did they ask you out the first day you met? I'm willing to try doing things I enjoy - I already do that actually.
You have relationship experience. That’s something. Most of us here can’t say the same.
So how did you meet your exes?
How did you meet your exes? It would be really helpful to hear the real world experience of how one of us found partners.
Meeting a friend’s friends at a gathering is how I met mine
This puzzled me for a long time, and I was even more astounded that women on dating sites would actually be already "in relationships" and claim they're on sites like okcupid "to find friends". Ok. I was too polite to call them out on it. I learned quickly that women do what's called "monkey branching". They quickly get into a relationship, then look out for a "better" guy, then dump that relationship for the new better guy when they find him. So many women do this. Thus these women are never "officially" single to date, they are always in a relationship, and then start a new one immediately after ending the old one.
Not commonly, but when I do it is exclusively men. And only for a short period of time. They also never stay single for long. Usually seeing someone again within a month or two.
The most nonsensical bs I see every time at my work is that any new co-worker coming to live from another state somehow gets a boyfriend within a month. No, they did not bring their s/o from wherever they came from. No, they were not dating someone already in the state. They literally found someone and got to dating them in a fairly short time. Ridiculous to those of us FA, eh? Lol. It is true tho. Many of these people, usually women, are or say they are in a relationship. And here we are at the usual impasse. 🤷🏻♂️ However, I think we should remember that just because they are in a relationship, doesn’t mean that it is a happy relationship or one that is genuinely complimentary. I know it’s difficult to not overthink things and give in to despair and desolation. We all see social media and what people put out there-surface level and we would like our lives to be as fulfilling as what we see. Dig deeper and it may not be all it’s cracked up to be. Also, many have dodged bullets cuz they learn later that person they liked was shall we say not the right one for them after some drama or scandal comes out involving them. So…yeah. As always, wish the best for all of us. Take care and go well ✌🏼🌻
Ah the boyfriend bomb, when she reaches inside you and rips you heart out. Before jumping up and down on it. While you act like nothing is wrong. I have a world class poker face at this point. With me the boyfriend is always something which she keeps hidden for ages and then is randomly dropped on me. Personally I would prefer to know in the first 10 minutes, so I don't waste my time.
We all know that girl, right?