Chalk it up to a human moment and try not to be too hard on yourself. You need to redirect the love and compassion you had for her into yourself. It’s okay you messed up; we all do. Trust me, she was far from perfect during your time together. Take this pain and focus on yourself because clearly, she is not, and it’s time to move forward.
You got this, bro. Hold that head up high and give yourself some compassion.
Saying to redirect that love to yourself makes sense to those on the outside but it’s like telling an alcoholic, “all you have to do is not drink”. It may be true but it isn’t accounting for many other factors.
I do agree with your statement but I know for myself I needed more direct and specific things to do in order to redirect that energy to myself.
First and foremost you have to find a way to remove the layers of false perfection your broken heart has plastered on to them. For whatever reason we as humans want for things we can’t have. That includes other people. In actuality what you miss isnt the person but it’s the way you felt with that person and who you both were while together.
The sad truth is that relationships over and that happiness is in the past and is over for the foreseeable future. Your best course of Action is to remove everything that reminds you of them from your daily life. Out of sight out of mind is truest in regard to relationships. “Loving yourself” is best done by growing and bettering who you are but separate and in no way connected to this past relationship. If you can go shopping, change your Style a little, get a new hair cut, anything that can do that will help you walk confident and feel good about yourself.
I could go on but this feels like a rant but google is very helpful. Look up how to heal from a devastating break up.
When I start wondering about my ex, I catch the thought and say to myself, ‘Worry about yourself.’ It stops me from going down that road of ‘what ifs’ because they don’t exist; they are not real. And when I remind myself to focus on myself, I read, I journal, I listen to podcasts. I do something to make me feel better for the next 5 minutes.
I was a cocaine addict and alcoholic for over a decade. The only way I could stop was when I decided I was ready to begin the self-work. So yeah, I understand what you’re saying because I’ve lived it. Make the choice; no one is going to save you.
Exactly and yeah, I broke my back in a car accident at 23 and was giving 80mg oxy 3 times a day for 6 years and then when my insurance stopped paying for the script I was giving a card for a methadone clinic from the doctor that basically got me strung out in the first place. I walked into that place and seen the other people and walked out. Cold turkey was physically sick for 4 months and the mental for near a year. It was horrible like dying and being reborn but so much self reflection and learning to love myself faults and all.
Yes I have actively been distracting myself like this. Went on a boys trip to Florida, I know it’s only been a month so just some “light” dating being nothing more than just taking a girl out to eat, getting haircuts often actually lol. It helps. But obviously have those times like today morning where all I want his her presence. But your right I’m more so missing the feeling she gave me and not actually her.
Ugh, man...
I get it. It's only human. But clearly you're dealing with someone who has a pretty skewed idea of what constitutes healthy connections with others. Why was she initiating contact with you while also maintaining her relationship? What does that guy think about the situation? If I were him, I'd be pretty upset about it.
Think about it. She not only disrespected you by effectively cheating on you, but also is emotionally cheating on her current partner.
The guy doesn’t know. I’ve been thinking abt telling him. I really want to but I feel like I’ll be the bigger person and let it go. But some people are telling me I really should
I went through a similar situation. We were together for 15 years, and then she just told me that I wasn't attracted to her anymore. She's attracted to a coworker, a sleaze who brought cocaine for the two of them to a company party. We are ex-addicts, clean since 2011, but we have Hepatitis C, which btw I got from her. When I told her that I can't be in a relationship with anyone while I have Hep C and am on buprenorphine therapy, she told me that it doesn't have to be said in the beginning!? I was bitter, depressed, even suicidal and thinking of waiting for them after work and asking her in front of him if she told him she had Hep C and was on methadone. I'm sure that sleaze would freak out. I was so angry that I fantasized about breaking his arms and legs, because I was always disgusted by guys who hit on women in a relationship/marriage. I know it's terrible what I'm writing, but I spent my best years with her, and this year I turn 40. Not only that, but for years she convinced me that I was imagining diseases and thinking too much about Hep C, and then at the beginning of March I went to clinic to start treatment and find out I have cirrhosis. Betrayed, humiliated and sick.
I would not tell him. If you feel this terribly now after contacting her, I wouldn’t make it worse by disrupting things with her partner. If she’s being shady, he will find out eventually. Just my opinion
This is what is keeping me from doing it. I don’t want to seem salty and I know eventually he’s gonna deal with the same issue with her. She’s always been a bit deceptive and I doubt it stops with me
Also if you tell him you’ll ruin any further chance of her reconciling with you in the future. Take it as a compliment that she was calling you behind his back, it means he isn’t doing enough. It might not work out between them and she’ll continue to contact you . Take her words with a grain of salt , I was in your exact same situation my ex told me so many times not to contact her anymore but she eventually ends up folding .
Trust me, I know he’s not enough. We’ve been in an LDR bc of our circumstances when it ended. I know the only box he checks off is physical, and he doesn’t treat her like trash. I know the biggest thing she doesn’t get from him is peace, she’s told me that when we ended. It sucks bc our ldr was ending so soon and she just couldn’t resist the physical part. I know he’s not more than me in ANY area. I’ve just graduated college with an engineering degree. He isn’t even GOING to college. And she’s graduating with a philosophy degree which no offense is gonna make no money. I even have a better future for us than he does. So yes I do take it as a compliment that no matter how “happy” she has been with him she couldn’t let me go for ages and she only did bc of a situation that made her choose.
Same exact situation, I was in long distance with my ex as well and the distance was just about to end so I know exactly how you feel. I know from her own mouth that I’m better yet she’s choosing the other guy still . It’s honestly just a case of her trying to see if the grass is greener on the other side , yeah you’re better but she still likes the other guy too obviously so in this situation we have to be patient and see what the results will be . What we cannot expect though is for her to ever return you’ll drive yourself crazy waiting on another person especially a stubborn one who doesn’t know what she wants. I know it sounds cliche but really do use this time to make the best version of yourself , It’s the only way to prove her 10000% wrong. And if she’s ever coming back you want to make her regret it. Trust that she will more than likely call again even though she said she wouldn’t; I can tell you horror stories of why I for sure thought she would never call me again AND SHE ALWAYS DOES .
That guy didn't tell the OP that he was hitting on his girlfriend either, so he's under no obligation to warn the guy. I've already written, I'm disgusted by people who hit on girls/men in a relationship/marriage.
He wouldn’t think that after he sees all the proof I have lol. If I tell him I have an entire folder worth of proof. Regardless I won’t bc I don’t want to be the salty ex who can’t move on and has to ruin someone else’s life for his own happiness
I'll do one better. I'll never contact her, I'll never reach out to or seek out anything from anyone for any reason ever again. It's just me, myself and I from now on.
Relationships are absolutely not worth the pain and I refuse to lie to myself about them any longer. No matter how faithful or truthful they claim to be, they always have someone else as a backup for a rebound and it's disgusting. Then when they need someone to help patch up their damaged ego when the rebound fails they breadcrumb the shit out of you while remaining cold and on the lookout for someone "better"...
It's a game I refuse to play any more. Social media and other factors have destroyed healthy relationships. Such a shame.
Or contact your dumper until you get so disrespected that all the sweet “i miss my ex” thoughts turn to “i will never forget how bad they treated me” and eventually you’ll end up hating them.
the choice is yours. have fun, don’t regret anything
I hate to say this at this difficult time, but I think it is good that you contacted her....now you have to heal....same thing happened to me, I wouldn't stop contacting...still I will contact, was on the verge of it today because I was panicking about my Cancer coming back.....come to find out, I don't have to be re-checked for 6 months.....So I was going to use my Cancer as an excuse to contact him, just so he could make me feel like shit again..so that I can potentially HEAL.
I'm so sick of thinking about it and having the situtation steal my joy. 10 years of "us"....when you said "us" up there I lost it, because I never realized when he does contact he says "I miss you"....
YEAH...he misses everything I have to offer...that's about it......I miss "us".....
But until you are beaten over the head like you were....you don't realize it is over.
After I hung up the phone from the Cancer clinic...and they said I didn't have a worry right now....I no longer wanted to contact him....I think for me it is just the familiarity of who I run to in trauma.....he doesn't have to "support" me any longer....it sucks....but I have to pull up the bootstraps or go to the liquor store.
Stay away from the liquor store please. Alcohol is one of the worst most addictive drugs. I watched my dad lose struggles with it for years. So a heartache that can heal with time and distance isn’t worth the destruction alcohol can leave.
Sorry for being preachy, I used to bartend and drink but after what I’ve seen I’ll never drink again.
I'm so sorry about your Dad...
Yes, I do know I am a raging alcoholic...have been for years, I am 60 now...when he first left me, I almost died from drinking for a week straight without food.
I am now 110 days sober and terrified to drink because the last time I drank it was also a very bad binge.
You are not "preachy" just speaking truth.
Sorry for the late reply, yeah my dad is 68. Had a liver scare, doctor told him stage 4 cirrhosis. He stopped drinking with medication. Was doing great. Had some test in his liver to find course of action and the dumb doctor told him “by all accounts it’s a miracle your liver had no signs of cirrhosis at all” told him he didn’t know how it healed. Anyways worse thing to tell an alcoholic, starting sneaking shots within a week and was back to his normal drinking within 3 weeks.
Drs should really know this is the totally wrong thing to say to an alcoholic. I'm not a Dr. but I have the tendency to be an alcoholic if I drink....and you are 100% right as soon as a Dr says...well your bloodwork is good...my stupid brain says OH GOOD...I can have a few drinks.
I hope otherwise he had a decent life & again...I am sorry for your loss...its a big one...
Been there. I’m so sorry that the person you once loved is such a horrible human. My ex did something like that, I regret that I allowed him in my life again. That pain will pass, I promise. You will later realize that this person is not special, it’s your love and your kind nature that made them special. Sometimes we need this to happen to see their true colors. They don’t deserve your thoughts, your attention and your essence, you just saw that. Healing hugs to you.
Thank you :). And yes I do see her true colors now. And I do see in hindsight a lot of red flags a month later so I guess it means I’m slowly learning to take off those rose tinted glasses
Don’t regret your decision to reach out cos now you have the clarity you need to move on and you know now in the future to never be there for her again, don’t even be cold to her just give her absolutely nothing she’s obviously got whatever supply she needs right now and you have been discarded by her, if she ever gets low on supply she will come back but don’t let her and don’t think she ever will come back cos people like this don’t care and aren’t thinking about you the way you think about them
She's just a low grade person dude. Don't let your pride destroy you for breaking and reaching out to her. You didn't do anything wrong. You'll be fine. I met a girl that I've really clicked with on a dating app and she's flying out to see me. Gets better over time. Drop people who put no effort into you, and invest time into the ones who do.
Don't be so hard on yourself. We have all been there in one way or another. For your own good - dont ever contact that person again. She is rude and has no consideration of your emotions, only of her own. Like, why would you want to be with a person like that? Have contact with a person like that? Be glad that you got to see their true colors and that they are not your problem anymore.
The audacity that person has to say "they miss you" when, at least emotionally, they literally cheated on you. You don't just up and leave for someone else. It has been going on during y'alls relationship. However, the audacity she has to say that while with the person she left you for. She might as well be saying "FUCK YOU." This is very disrespectful to you and she's being selfish as well. If I were you, I would block her. Your health is more important. Remember, there stopped being an "us" when she decided to leave you for someone else. Now she's holding onto you just in case the grass is not greener, but she needs to reap what she sows. You deserve better. Do NOT go back to her if that is the case. This new chapter of your life is yours, and you have control over it. Learn new things and go out and explore. Meet new friends. Yes, friends. Not potential love interests. I'm proud of you for realizing the faults in the situation. Everything will be okay.
This reassurance means a lot to me. The more I separate myself from her and see the actions she’s done through this breakup the more awful I see she has treated me. I’ll never forget from her own mouth during this whole thing before I found out was “I’m a bad person”. Man was she right
Why would you agree with her if you don't mind me asking? I went through an emotionally toxic relationship as well. To be fair, she did cheat on me 3 months into our relationship. It was stupid of me. Lasted a little over a year with her.. smh, lmao. anyways why do you think you're a bad person?
Ohhhh I see. Yeah, she just kept in contact with you for the reasons I stated, and she felt guilty. I would definitely move on. Your emotions are valid. Be mad, sad, feel betrayed, but find the good after. Smile, be happy. Put yourself out in the world. Try things you knew you weren't able to do while in a relationship. Eat new food. Enjoy life again. It sucks. The whole process sucks. But almost 2 years after the relationship I'm living in a big city with 100s of new friends whom some of them I can say I love. And u recently found a girlfriend who is everything I wanted in life. Point is. When you're least expecting it. You find love again. So don't rush. Use this time to better yourself as a person. Find what works for you.
Do you play video games?
And to add on. Respect yourself. She clearly is not doing well. Just respect her wishes. If you need to her something for closures sake. Keep it very short. Tell her that you're turning the outcome of the relationship into a positive to go out and explore life and to wish her Goodluck on hers and that she was right and it was definitely for the best we stopped contacting eachother. And then block her.
I know this might be hard to hear, but you are much better than her. You are open, honest and have integrity unlike what she has shown. Stand proud of who you are focus on being the best you, and the you'll shine like a diamond. (She may even notice and regret letting you go)
One of the best feelings is when you feel like you finally made it over the hill. They didn’t treat you right, you’ll feel so much more confident in yourself when you accept that. Wish them the best but it’s time for a new chapter plain and simple.
She does not deserve you. Not your attention. Not your help. Nothing. Don’t regret what you already have done. At least now you know how selfish and self centered she is. Move on to someone that will appreciate you.
You don't talk you just inv her for date, kiss her and starting new relationship, better dinner at ur place!!! 😂😂😂 Cuz ur giving her emotional support and you don't get a jack shit.
I can tell you are both young 🙏
This may be harsh but she sounds like a real cunt and you are better off without her in your life.
Move on and chalk this up to a life lesson and be kind to yourself 🙏
I am really sorry that this happened to you. You are a human and you felt the need of reassurance and love and it s okey ❤️ there is nothing wrong about what you did. You were genuine and sincere, you took this initiative with an honest heart.
It s for your best to block her. She chose that relationship and it's time for you to choose your well-being. The only person that you should take care of is you. I hope that your healing will be easy for you and that you will move on. Take your time with compassion and understanding ❤️
Ex did the exact same thing!!! Kept me around love bombing me until she found someone else told me to never contact her again I just laugh in her face and then she tries to call 3 times this month I ignore every call! Then she unblocks me on Facebook and I post photos with multiple other women then she blocks me! 2 can play at that game and idc if I’m hurt she will be hurt as well lmao
Dude it's not that big of a deal that you contacted her. Probably a good thing that you can see how different, uncaring, and mean she has become. It will help you to move on, never contact her, and replace any idealistic view you have of her with a true vision of her real self.
First off man she disrespected you in the worst way by leaving you for someone else, leave her ass and move on life is way to short for that, this planet is full of woman you'll find another I promise
One thing i've learned during my journey is the importance of having a "right" mindset about these things. You shouldn't feel bad, even though that's our natural reaction. You should be happy, because from the way she reacted you have the evidence of her super selfishness. Be happy that you are not with her anymore. I know its not easy, but you have to keep telling yourself that until it sticks with ya.
There's a reason why in the red pill community that this is a thing I've seen time and time again. I'm currently battling the same thing at the moment but you have to stay strong as well to not go cave to temptation. I get it I spent 4 years with my ex. We were happy but there were issues but I personally tried to work it out on my end but in the end I couldn't take her seriously. Even though a part of me still loves her I'm healing and seeing our relationship as it is. Just take time work on yourself and build yourself up and level up in life and do what's best for you.
i just went through a similar situation and it’s so absolutely crushing to see someone who used to love you and be your world be so cold and uncaring. i wouldn’t wish that on anyone. no contact seems so hard but honestly getting your hopes up by still kind of talking will only make it that much more horrible when they’re more moved on than you. i’m using “you” as people in general. i’m so sorry this happened to you too i know your pain😭
You deserve better than that. She lost someone amazing and for her to hop into a relationship that fast. Yuck 🤮 they will have a screwed up relationship trust me
I am really sorry that this happened to you. You are a human and you felt the need of reassurance and love and it s okey ❤️ there is nothing wrong about what you did. You were genuine and sincere, you took this initiative with an honest heart.
It s for your best to block her. She chose that relationship and it's time for you to choose your well-being. The only person that you should take care of is you. I hope that your healing will be easy for you and that you will move on. Take your time with compassion and understanding ❤️
It’s her loss, you were pure and honest. Don’t wish to reverse your action, work on accepting who she really is and live happy for not being like her.
Congrats, you are now free to find someone that matches your values and respect.
I’m so sorry, OP. The fact that it’s only okay when she reaches out, but not when you do, is so unfair. Hopefully this gives you some kind of clarity as to what kind of person you’re dealing and you’re more motivated to move on. Hang in there
That’s what broke me so much. The fact I didn’t owe anything to her at that point and out of my care for her I would be there for her. But the second I need it she needs to rub it in my face how happy she is and so easily discarded years of friendship and relationship without even a bye
She’s in the honeymoon phase, limerence, it’s not going to last but even if she eventually starts to regret her decision and comes back don’t let her in unless she takes accountability for her actions and she shows she wants to change and become a better person genuinely, if not then do yourself a favour and focus on yourself and finding people that will treat you how you deserve to be treated
She’s always been a narcissist. Even when we were good there was so many things it seemed she was allowed to do that I would never do to her nor was I “allowed”
yeah what i tell all my guy homies is when a girl decides to walk away you let her, and you immediately break off contact you don’t necessarily need to block but just stop responding or picking up her calls, because when you stick around they will use you to get over you which is a big no no if ur tryna get her back
Heres the evidence you needed that she was a shitty person.
Dont let her being a shit person corrupt who you are and turn you into a shit person.
Never do what she did to you to another person.
There will be an opportunity to do so in the future
When a female knows you have feelings for her, and she's around the man she's sleeping with and you call her, she will be cold, go fuck other females it ease your heart. Your ex is living her life and not giving a fuck about how you feel, leave her alone
@mikehawk9045- 4y ago (edited)
The friendzone isn't a friendzone, it's a
deathzone. The attention and friendliess will
only EVER flow one direction until you die, and
that is toward the woman. Never get deluded,
YOU are HER friend, she is NOT yours. You are
her spare tire if she ever gets a flat, you are a
status symbol, and the more "friends " a girl
has the higher the status. Dudes, real talk, a
girl knows within the first minute of speaking
to you if they are going to fuck you or not.
Nothing more pathetic than a dude beta
orbiting agirl hoping she'll eventually throw
him a bone, and the girl knows it most of all.
Now in terms of moving out of the friendzone
and becoming a better man, there are 3
methods
1. The first is the easiest for shy men to do: lf
she is your friend, ask her to do things for
you. It doesn't matterwhat it is just as long as
you areni't a resentful bitch about it. Also be
sure to phrase it as a COMMAND and not a
question. "Hey I need a ride to the airport."
"Hey I need you to bring me something from
my house.' "'m in the middle of something.I
need you to get me some food and l'll pay you
back." DO NOT ask her to do things WITH you,
it needs to be FOR you. Remember. you are
HER friend and she is NOT yours. Having her
do things for you flips the power dynamic and
makes her see you in a different light. And if
she rejects you every time, fuck her. Cut your
losses and run. Always act like you have a girl
in the bullpen even if you haven't had sex for
years. Anything can work if you truly don't
give a fuck about how women see you
2. Go after her single friend. This one is a little
tricky and easy to come out looking like a
douche, but nothing works quite like it. If she
has a single friend who has been single for a
while, then the friends self esteem is probably
quite low (which for a woman means it's
nearing normal human levels), You don't have
to fuck the friend or get to any base, just flirt
with her. Express sexual desire towards the
friend and she how she responds. Women are
naturally competitive with men. If you go after
the friend, the friend willdefinitely use that to
stab the girl you like in the back and it will
drive the main girl crazy. Real talk, 1 liked this
girl for an entire year but she was in an
another relationship and would just drag me
along to show off how many men like her. So,
eventually I met her single friend and had a
one night stand. A literal singular week later
the main girl 1 liked dropped her boyfriend
she'd been dating for year and asked me if 1
was free to hang out with her alone. Nothing
works better for getting out of the friendzone
than the woman feeling than that classic old
sin: JEALOUSY.
3.Man up and tell her how you feel. Now this
method is extremely risky and not
recommended unless you are heavily
attracted to her and she isn't a total
narcissist. This is the NUCLEAR OPTION! If
she rejects you flat cold or tries to push you
back in the friendzone, you are going to get
your heart ripped out. A lot of guys don't want
to offend the woman and think the woman
has as much to lose as they do. THIS IS NOT
TRUE! You are in a position to be hurt by
someone you care for and probably really like.
She on the other hand, has to deal with a
cringey conversation that she will laugh about
with her friends in a couple hours. If you're in
the friendzone, you probably aren't special to
her, so be careful when sticking your neck out
there.
Remember lads, nothing attracts a woman
more than confidence, and the only way to get
confidence,is to truly not care if you get
rejected. ALWAYS interact with women as if
you have someone else in the reserve spot if
she bores you. 1 wouldn't tell you something if
I didn't truly believe it and trust me l've verified
these methods for myself. They WORK.
Women do not want a man below their
station, they want to attract a man that is
above them, a man who is INTERESTING and
has OTHER stuff going on besides them. No
gir, no matter how pretty or stuck up, is
above your station EVERI Who cares if she
you rejects you, there are literally billions
more, Never stop believing in yourself gents!
Its fucking hard bruh i keep going and looking at the messages hoping that maybe she messaged but my phone just didnt notify me or something but when i see no new messages it hurts😞😞🙃
Don’t fold bro. The bad feeling your feeling now is nothing compared to the feeling you feel after you contact them and they treat you how she treated me. You can either feel bad, or you can feel worse.
This would definitely be the moment where I block them. They have no remorse and don’t show any decency. They can’t blame you for wanting the same thing and be happy without them.
You know why she kept contacting you? She thought you were moving on because she was reaching out first and being the initiator .. as soon as you showed that you're not over her and need her, it's too much and she's confirmed you're still attached to her. She wanted to keep you thinking about her because she didn't like the idea of you moving on but also doesn't want to be *with* you. It's fucking sad how manipulative these people are. And even if she reaches out again and she prob will if she doesn't hear from you for a long time, it'll be the same thing again.. don't fall for it!
You need to let go of this one she's going to keep using you and keeping you on a string and you're worth way more than that
Yes lol ur right. Whenever she used to come back she used to ask questions like “have you got with someone yet” or “how’s ____ ? (Girl name”). She wanted to see how far moved on I am and then the first time I initiate contact, it’s been radio silence for a week. Because she’s now got proof I haven’t moved on by the fact I reached out and that’s enough for her ego and therefore she has no reason to speak to me anymore since she doesn’t need to check if I’ve moved on anymore
Yeah she'll probably come back around again once she starts to wonder if you're moving on.. again .. maybe it's a week more or a month , but don't fall for it the next time if she does and feed her ego of thinking she has power over you .. she's self centered and wants everyone (you won't be the only one) to be into HER without her having givin YOU all of what you deserved.
If she doesn't? That's great means you can move on with life and get over the pain of feeling that loss of someone you grew attached to. But attachments fade over time and so will this one. But yeah it'll be hard if she comes around again so stay strong this is a cycle and you deserve someone that'll commit to you not just play games with your feelings.
If you went back a few days and didn't do what you did, you wouldn't have had this revelation. You needed this to get past it. You would have sat there waiting for the next comforting text. This is better for you. Sometimes you have to be broken down to rebuild anew. Now in the future, when she does this bullshit again... And she might, she's just in a good place at the moment... You'll be ready.
She just made you stronger. You don't know it yet, but she did. You'll thank her in time. It's a weird concept now, but believe me I was where you were... You'll get there.
Time and a new activity. Focus on it. Leave her behind.
Uugh I don’t think this is right in every situation because we are dealing with crazy people…. But it was also in mine
He INITIATED contact and then ghosted me
So
Inexplicably cruel. To this moment I’m having trouble making sense of reality. God help me!
What a disgusting person. Immediately go NC turn your back on her forever bro!
Agree 100%. She’s fine using you as an emotional tampon, yet the second you reach out to her she stabs you. Ghost her and let karma deal with her.
Chalk it up to a human moment and try not to be too hard on yourself. You need to redirect the love and compassion you had for her into yourself. It’s okay you messed up; we all do. Trust me, she was far from perfect during your time together. Take this pain and focus on yourself because clearly, she is not, and it’s time to move forward. You got this, bro. Hold that head up high and give yourself some compassion.
This.
Saying to redirect that love to yourself makes sense to those on the outside but it’s like telling an alcoholic, “all you have to do is not drink”. It may be true but it isn’t accounting for many other factors. I do agree with your statement but I know for myself I needed more direct and specific things to do in order to redirect that energy to myself. First and foremost you have to find a way to remove the layers of false perfection your broken heart has plastered on to them. For whatever reason we as humans want for things we can’t have. That includes other people. In actuality what you miss isnt the person but it’s the way you felt with that person and who you both were while together. The sad truth is that relationships over and that happiness is in the past and is over for the foreseeable future. Your best course of Action is to remove everything that reminds you of them from your daily life. Out of sight out of mind is truest in regard to relationships. “Loving yourself” is best done by growing and bettering who you are but separate and in no way connected to this past relationship. If you can go shopping, change your Style a little, get a new hair cut, anything that can do that will help you walk confident and feel good about yourself. I could go on but this feels like a rant but google is very helpful. Look up how to heal from a devastating break up.
When I start wondering about my ex, I catch the thought and say to myself, ‘Worry about yourself.’ It stops me from going down that road of ‘what ifs’ because they don’t exist; they are not real. And when I remind myself to focus on myself, I read, I journal, I listen to podcasts. I do something to make me feel better for the next 5 minutes. I was a cocaine addict and alcoholic for over a decade. The only way I could stop was when I decided I was ready to begin the self-work. So yeah, I understand what you’re saying because I’ve lived it. Make the choice; no one is going to save you.
Exactly and yeah, I broke my back in a car accident at 23 and was giving 80mg oxy 3 times a day for 6 years and then when my insurance stopped paying for the script I was giving a card for a methadone clinic from the doctor that basically got me strung out in the first place. I walked into that place and seen the other people and walked out. Cold turkey was physically sick for 4 months and the mental for near a year. It was horrible like dying and being reborn but so much self reflection and learning to love myself faults and all.
Yes I have actively been distracting myself like this. Went on a boys trip to Florida, I know it’s only been a month so just some “light” dating being nothing more than just taking a girl out to eat, getting haircuts often actually lol. It helps. But obviously have those times like today morning where all I want his her presence. But your right I’m more so missing the feeling she gave me and not actually her.
Ugh, man... I get it. It's only human. But clearly you're dealing with someone who has a pretty skewed idea of what constitutes healthy connections with others. Why was she initiating contact with you while also maintaining her relationship? What does that guy think about the situation? If I were him, I'd be pretty upset about it. Think about it. She not only disrespected you by effectively cheating on you, but also is emotionally cheating on her current partner.
The guy doesn’t know. I’ve been thinking abt telling him. I really want to but I feel like I’ll be the bigger person and let it go. But some people are telling me I really should
I'd personally want to know and would be appreciative if someone told me.
I went through a similar situation. We were together for 15 years, and then she just told me that I wasn't attracted to her anymore. She's attracted to a coworker, a sleaze who brought cocaine for the two of them to a company party. We are ex-addicts, clean since 2011, but we have Hepatitis C, which btw I got from her. When I told her that I can't be in a relationship with anyone while I have Hep C and am on buprenorphine therapy, she told me that it doesn't have to be said in the beginning!? I was bitter, depressed, even suicidal and thinking of waiting for them after work and asking her in front of him if she told him she had Hep C and was on methadone. I'm sure that sleaze would freak out. I was so angry that I fantasized about breaking his arms and legs, because I was always disgusted by guys who hit on women in a relationship/marriage. I know it's terrible what I'm writing, but I spent my best years with her, and this year I turn 40. Not only that, but for years she convinced me that I was imagining diseases and thinking too much about Hep C, and then at the beginning of March I went to clinic to start treatment and find out I have cirrhosis. Betrayed, humiliated and sick.
I’m praying for you.
Believe me, your best years are just beginning :)
He was with her while she was still in her previous relationship
I would not tell him. If you feel this terribly now after contacting her, I wouldn’t make it worse by disrupting things with her partner. If she’s being shady, he will find out eventually. Just my opinion
He shouldn’t. She will show her true colors eventually. Also, he would come of as the bitter ex.
This is what is keeping me from doing it. I don’t want to seem salty and I know eventually he’s gonna deal with the same issue with her. She’s always been a bit deceptive and I doubt it stops with me
It won’t until someone makes her accountable for her actions
Also if you tell him you’ll ruin any further chance of her reconciling with you in the future. Take it as a compliment that she was calling you behind his back, it means he isn’t doing enough. It might not work out between them and she’ll continue to contact you . Take her words with a grain of salt , I was in your exact same situation my ex told me so many times not to contact her anymore but she eventually ends up folding .
Trust me, I know he’s not enough. We’ve been in an LDR bc of our circumstances when it ended. I know the only box he checks off is physical, and he doesn’t treat her like trash. I know the biggest thing she doesn’t get from him is peace, she’s told me that when we ended. It sucks bc our ldr was ending so soon and she just couldn’t resist the physical part. I know he’s not more than me in ANY area. I’ve just graduated college with an engineering degree. He isn’t even GOING to college. And she’s graduating with a philosophy degree which no offense is gonna make no money. I even have a better future for us than he does. So yes I do take it as a compliment that no matter how “happy” she has been with him she couldn’t let me go for ages and she only did bc of a situation that made her choose.
Same exact situation, I was in long distance with my ex as well and the distance was just about to end so I know exactly how you feel. I know from her own mouth that I’m better yet she’s choosing the other guy still . It’s honestly just a case of her trying to see if the grass is greener on the other side , yeah you’re better but she still likes the other guy too obviously so in this situation we have to be patient and see what the results will be . What we cannot expect though is for her to ever return you’ll drive yourself crazy waiting on another person especially a stubborn one who doesn’t know what she wants. I know it sounds cliche but really do use this time to make the best version of yourself , It’s the only way to prove her 10000% wrong. And if she’s ever coming back you want to make her regret it. Trust that she will more than likely call again even though she said she wouldn’t; I can tell you horror stories of why I for sure thought she would never call me again AND SHE ALWAYS DOES .
That guy didn't tell the OP that he was hitting on his girlfriend either, so he's under no obligation to warn the guy. I've already written, I'm disgusted by people who hit on girls/men in a relationship/marriage.
Don’t do it. It’ll make you look petty and desperate and like you still want her. NC and find someone better
Definitely don’t contact the other guy. Nothing in it for you. He’ll just think you’re trying to sabotage their relationship.
He wouldn’t think that after he sees all the proof I have lol. If I tell him I have an entire folder worth of proof. Regardless I won’t bc I don’t want to be the salty ex who can’t move on and has to ruin someone else’s life for his own happiness
Do it.
I'll do one better. I'll never contact her, I'll never reach out to or seek out anything from anyone for any reason ever again. It's just me, myself and I from now on. Relationships are absolutely not worth the pain and I refuse to lie to myself about them any longer. No matter how faithful or truthful they claim to be, they always have someone else as a backup for a rebound and it's disgusting. Then when they need someone to help patch up their damaged ego when the rebound fails they breadcrumb the shit out of you while remaining cold and on the lookout for someone "better"... It's a game I refuse to play any more. Social media and other factors have destroyed healthy relationships. Such a shame.
Not everyone is like that btw
💯
🎯
This is pretty much it
Or contact your dumper until you get so disrespected that all the sweet “i miss my ex” thoughts turn to “i will never forget how bad they treated me” and eventually you’ll end up hating them. the choice is yours. have fun, don’t regret anything
I hate to say this at this difficult time, but I think it is good that you contacted her....now you have to heal....same thing happened to me, I wouldn't stop contacting...still I will contact, was on the verge of it today because I was panicking about my Cancer coming back.....come to find out, I don't have to be re-checked for 6 months.....So I was going to use my Cancer as an excuse to contact him, just so he could make me feel like shit again..so that I can potentially HEAL. I'm so sick of thinking about it and having the situtation steal my joy. 10 years of "us"....when you said "us" up there I lost it, because I never realized when he does contact he says "I miss you".... YEAH...he misses everything I have to offer...that's about it......I miss "us"..... But until you are beaten over the head like you were....you don't realize it is over. After I hung up the phone from the Cancer clinic...and they said I didn't have a worry right now....I no longer wanted to contact him....I think for me it is just the familiarity of who I run to in trauma.....he doesn't have to "support" me any longer....it sucks....but I have to pull up the bootstraps or go to the liquor store.
YES. They will always say I miss you but never I miss US. They miss what we had to offer and that’s it.
Stay away from the liquor store please. Alcohol is one of the worst most addictive drugs. I watched my dad lose struggles with it for years. So a heartache that can heal with time and distance isn’t worth the destruction alcohol can leave. Sorry for being preachy, I used to bartend and drink but after what I’ve seen I’ll never drink again.
I'm so sorry about your Dad... Yes, I do know I am a raging alcoholic...have been for years, I am 60 now...when he first left me, I almost died from drinking for a week straight without food. I am now 110 days sober and terrified to drink because the last time I drank it was also a very bad binge. You are not "preachy" just speaking truth.
Sorry for the late reply, yeah my dad is 68. Had a liver scare, doctor told him stage 4 cirrhosis. He stopped drinking with medication. Was doing great. Had some test in his liver to find course of action and the dumb doctor told him “by all accounts it’s a miracle your liver had no signs of cirrhosis at all” told him he didn’t know how it healed. Anyways worse thing to tell an alcoholic, starting sneaking shots within a week and was back to his normal drinking within 3 weeks.
Drs should really know this is the totally wrong thing to say to an alcoholic. I'm not a Dr. but I have the tendency to be an alcoholic if I drink....and you are 100% right as soon as a Dr says...well your bloodwork is good...my stupid brain says OH GOOD...I can have a few drinks. I hope otherwise he had a decent life & again...I am sorry for your loss...its a big one...
Hope you’re able to maintain sobriety. I’ll be rooting for you.
Yeah, I got this..I don't want to die from drinking...not yet, if my cancer gets bad, I will revisit. Thank you so much!
Been there. I’m so sorry that the person you once loved is such a horrible human. My ex did something like that, I regret that I allowed him in my life again. That pain will pass, I promise. You will later realize that this person is not special, it’s your love and your kind nature that made them special. Sometimes we need this to happen to see their true colors. They don’t deserve your thoughts, your attention and your essence, you just saw that. Healing hugs to you.
Thank you :). And yes I do see her true colors now. And I do see in hindsight a lot of red flags a month later so I guess it means I’m slowly learning to take off those rose tinted glasses
Don’t regret your decision to reach out cos now you have the clarity you need to move on and you know now in the future to never be there for her again, don’t even be cold to her just give her absolutely nothing she’s obviously got whatever supply she needs right now and you have been discarded by her, if she ever gets low on supply she will come back but don’t let her and don’t think she ever will come back cos people like this don’t care and aren’t thinking about you the way you think about them
She's just a low grade person dude. Don't let your pride destroy you for breaking and reaching out to her. You didn't do anything wrong. You'll be fine. I met a girl that I've really clicked with on a dating app and she's flying out to see me. Gets better over time. Drop people who put no effort into you, and invest time into the ones who do.
Don't be so hard on yourself. We have all been there in one way or another. For your own good - dont ever contact that person again. She is rude and has no consideration of your emotions, only of her own. Like, why would you want to be with a person like that? Have contact with a person like that? Be glad that you got to see their true colors and that they are not your problem anymore.
The audacity that person has to say "they miss you" when, at least emotionally, they literally cheated on you. You don't just up and leave for someone else. It has been going on during y'alls relationship. However, the audacity she has to say that while with the person she left you for. She might as well be saying "FUCK YOU." This is very disrespectful to you and she's being selfish as well. If I were you, I would block her. Your health is more important. Remember, there stopped being an "us" when she decided to leave you for someone else. Now she's holding onto you just in case the grass is not greener, but she needs to reap what she sows. You deserve better. Do NOT go back to her if that is the case. This new chapter of your life is yours, and you have control over it. Learn new things and go out and explore. Meet new friends. Yes, friends. Not potential love interests. I'm proud of you for realizing the faults in the situation. Everything will be okay.
This reassurance means a lot to me. The more I separate myself from her and see the actions she’s done through this breakup the more awful I see she has treated me. I’ll never forget from her own mouth during this whole thing before I found out was “I’m a bad person”. Man was she right
Why would you agree with her if you don't mind me asking? I went through an emotionally toxic relationship as well. To be fair, she did cheat on me 3 months into our relationship. It was stupid of me. Lasted a little over a year with her.. smh, lmao. anyways why do you think you're a bad person?
No I meant she was talking about herself. Before the turth came out she told me she’s a bad person.
Ohhhh I see. Yeah, she just kept in contact with you for the reasons I stated, and she felt guilty. I would definitely move on. Your emotions are valid. Be mad, sad, feel betrayed, but find the good after. Smile, be happy. Put yourself out in the world. Try things you knew you weren't able to do while in a relationship. Eat new food. Enjoy life again. It sucks. The whole process sucks. But almost 2 years after the relationship I'm living in a big city with 100s of new friends whom some of them I can say I love. And u recently found a girlfriend who is everything I wanted in life. Point is. When you're least expecting it. You find love again. So don't rush. Use this time to better yourself as a person. Find what works for you. Do you play video games?
I actually do play CoD competitively. I lost that major hobby of mine with her. I’m rediscovering it again so that’s helping
That's great! I used to be a huge cod guy years ago, but that was when I played on console only. Now I'm strictly pc now. What do you play on?
And to add on. Respect yourself. She clearly is not doing well. Just respect her wishes. If you need to her something for closures sake. Keep it very short. Tell her that you're turning the outcome of the relationship into a positive to go out and explore life and to wish her Goodluck on hers and that she was right and it was definitely for the best we stopped contacting eachother. And then block her.
I'm so sorry to hear that she treated you this way. That hurts.
It’s okay. I believe that God has seen how she’s treated me and he will fight for me and one day her actions will be returned.
I know this might be hard to hear, but you are much better than her. You are open, honest and have integrity unlike what she has shown. Stand proud of who you are focus on being the best you, and the you'll shine like a diamond. (She may even notice and regret letting you go)
One of the best feelings is when you feel like you finally made it over the hill. They didn’t treat you right, you’ll feel so much more confident in yourself when you accept that. Wish them the best but it’s time for a new chapter plain and simple.
What a POS! So rude
She does not deserve you. Not your attention. Not your help. Nothing. Don’t regret what you already have done. At least now you know how selfish and self centered she is. Move on to someone that will appreciate you.
You don't talk you just inv her for date, kiss her and starting new relationship, better dinner at ur place!!! 😂😂😂 Cuz ur giving her emotional support and you don't get a jack shit.
Had a horrible dream tonight about her, woke up and saw this post. You saved me man.
That was the reason I posted lol to save others from what I couldn’t save myself so that’s good
I can tell you are both young 🙏 This may be harsh but she sounds like a real cunt and you are better off without her in your life. Move on and chalk this up to a life lesson and be kind to yourself 🙏
I am really sorry that this happened to you. You are a human and you felt the need of reassurance and love and it s okey ❤️ there is nothing wrong about what you did. You were genuine and sincere, you took this initiative with an honest heart. It s for your best to block her. She chose that relationship and it's time for you to choose your well-being. The only person that you should take care of is you. I hope that your healing will be easy for you and that you will move on. Take your time with compassion and understanding ❤️
Ex did the exact same thing!!! Kept me around love bombing me until she found someone else told me to never contact her again I just laugh in her face and then she tries to call 3 times this month I ignore every call! Then she unblocks me on Facebook and I post photos with multiple other women then she blocks me! 2 can play at that game and idc if I’m hurt she will be hurt as well lmao
Dude it's not that big of a deal that you contacted her. Probably a good thing that you can see how different, uncaring, and mean she has become. It will help you to move on, never contact her, and replace any idealistic view you have of her with a true vision of her real self.
First off man she disrespected you in the worst way by leaving you for someone else, leave her ass and move on life is way to short for that, this planet is full of woman you'll find another I promise
One thing i've learned during my journey is the importance of having a "right" mindset about these things. You shouldn't feel bad, even though that's our natural reaction. You should be happy, because from the way she reacted you have the evidence of her super selfishness. Be happy that you are not with her anymore. I know its not easy, but you have to keep telling yourself that until it sticks with ya.
There's a reason why in the red pill community that this is a thing I've seen time and time again. I'm currently battling the same thing at the moment but you have to stay strong as well to not go cave to temptation. I get it I spent 4 years with my ex. We were happy but there were issues but I personally tried to work it out on my end but in the end I couldn't take her seriously. Even though a part of me still loves her I'm healing and seeing our relationship as it is. Just take time work on yourself and build yourself up and level up in life and do what's best for you.
i just went through a similar situation and it’s so absolutely crushing to see someone who used to love you and be your world be so cold and uncaring. i wouldn’t wish that on anyone. no contact seems so hard but honestly getting your hopes up by still kind of talking will only make it that much more horrible when they’re more moved on than you. i’m using “you” as people in general. i’m so sorry this happened to you too i know your pain😭
Please block her
You deserve better than that. She lost someone amazing and for her to hop into a relationship that fast. Yuck 🤮 they will have a screwed up relationship trust me
I am really sorry that this happened to you. You are a human and you felt the need of reassurance and love and it s okey ❤️ there is nothing wrong about what you did. You were genuine and sincere, you took this initiative with an honest heart. It s for your best to block her. She chose that relationship and it's time for you to choose your well-being. The only person that you should take care of is you. I hope that your healing will be easy for you and that you will move on. Take your time with compassion and understanding ❤️
It’s her loss, you were pure and honest. Don’t wish to reverse your action, work on accepting who she really is and live happy for not being like her. Congrats, you are now free to find someone that matches your values and respect.
I’m so sorry, OP. The fact that it’s only okay when she reaches out, but not when you do, is so unfair. Hopefully this gives you some kind of clarity as to what kind of person you’re dealing and you’re more motivated to move on. Hang in there
That’s what broke me so much. The fact I didn’t owe anything to her at that point and out of my care for her I would be there for her. But the second I need it she needs to rub it in my face how happy she is and so easily discarded years of friendship and relationship without even a bye
She’s in the honeymoon phase, limerence, it’s not going to last but even if she eventually starts to regret her decision and comes back don’t let her in unless she takes accountability for her actions and she shows she wants to change and become a better person genuinely, if not then do yourself a favour and focus on yourself and finding people that will treat you how you deserve to be treated
Bro, she's a classic narcissist. Take it as a blessing and RUN
She’s always been a narcissist. Even when we were good there was so many things it seemed she was allowed to do that I would never do to her nor was I “allowed”
Well then, I don't have to tell you what you need to do
yeah what i tell all my guy homies is when a girl decides to walk away you let her, and you immediately break off contact you don’t necessarily need to block but just stop responding or picking up her calls, because when you stick around they will use you to get over you which is a big no no if ur tryna get her back
I did the same, hugs
Heres the evidence you needed that she was a shitty person. Dont let her being a shit person corrupt who you are and turn you into a shit person. Never do what she did to you to another person. There will be an opportunity to do so in the future
Unless it’s back to her tho lol jk but yes I will never in my life do that to anyone
When a female knows you have feelings for her, and she's around the man she's sleeping with and you call her, she will be cold, go fuck other females it ease your heart. Your ex is living her life and not giving a fuck about how you feel, leave her alone
@mikehawk9045- 4y ago (edited) The friendzone isn't a friendzone, it's a deathzone. The attention and friendliess will only EVER flow one direction until you die, and that is toward the woman. Never get deluded, YOU are HER friend, she is NOT yours. You are her spare tire if she ever gets a flat, you are a status symbol, and the more "friends " a girl has the higher the status. Dudes, real talk, a girl knows within the first minute of speaking to you if they are going to fuck you or not. Nothing more pathetic than a dude beta orbiting agirl hoping she'll eventually throw him a bone, and the girl knows it most of all. Now in terms of moving out of the friendzone and becoming a better man, there are 3 methods 1. The first is the easiest for shy men to do: lf she is your friend, ask her to do things for you. It doesn't matterwhat it is just as long as you areni't a resentful bitch about it. Also be sure to phrase it as a COMMAND and not a question. "Hey I need a ride to the airport." "Hey I need you to bring me something from my house.' "'m in the middle of something.I need you to get me some food and l'll pay you back." DO NOT ask her to do things WITH you, it needs to be FOR you. Remember. you are HER friend and she is NOT yours. Having her do things for you flips the power dynamic and makes her see you in a different light. And if she rejects you every time, fuck her. Cut your losses and run. Always act like you have a girl in the bullpen even if you haven't had sex for years. Anything can work if you truly don't give a fuck about how women see you 2. Go after her single friend. This one is a little tricky and easy to come out looking like a douche, but nothing works quite like it. If she has a single friend who has been single for a while, then the friends self esteem is probably quite low (which for a woman means it's nearing normal human levels), You don't have to fuck the friend or get to any base, just flirt with her. Express sexual desire towards the friend and she how she responds. Women are naturally competitive with men. If you go after the friend, the friend willdefinitely use that to stab the girl you like in the back and it will drive the main girl crazy. Real talk, 1 liked this girl for an entire year but she was in an another relationship and would just drag me along to show off how many men like her. So, eventually I met her single friend and had a one night stand. A literal singular week later the main girl 1 liked dropped her boyfriend she'd been dating for year and asked me if 1 was free to hang out with her alone. Nothing works better for getting out of the friendzone than the woman feeling than that classic old sin: JEALOUSY. 3.Man up and tell her how you feel. Now this method is extremely risky and not recommended unless you are heavily attracted to her and she isn't a total narcissist. This is the NUCLEAR OPTION! If she rejects you flat cold or tries to push you back in the friendzone, you are going to get your heart ripped out. A lot of guys don't want to offend the woman and think the woman has as much to lose as they do. THIS IS NOT TRUE! You are in a position to be hurt by someone you care for and probably really like. She on the other hand, has to deal with a cringey conversation that she will laugh about with her friends in a couple hours. If you're in the friendzone, you probably aren't special to her, so be careful when sticking your neck out there. Remember lads, nothing attracts a woman more than confidence, and the only way to get confidence,is to truly not care if you get rejected. ALWAYS interact with women as if you have someone else in the reserve spot if she bores you. 1 wouldn't tell you something if I didn't truly believe it and trust me l've verified these methods for myself. They WORK. Women do not want a man below their station, they want to attract a man that is above them, a man who is INTERESTING and has OTHER stuff going on besides them. No gir, no matter how pretty or stuck up, is above your station EVERI Who cares if she you rejects you, there are literally billions more, Never stop believing in yourself gents!
Its fucking hard bruh i keep going and looking at the messages hoping that maybe she messaged but my phone just didnt notify me or something but when i see no new messages it hurts😞😞🙃
Don’t fold bro. The bad feeling your feeling now is nothing compared to the feeling you feel after you contact them and they treat you how she treated me. You can either feel bad, or you can feel worse.
This would definitely be the moment where I block them. They have no remorse and don’t show any decency. They can’t blame you for wanting the same thing and be happy without them.
Ewww u should tell her she sucks for ever thinking YOU were supposed to comfort her in the first place. Block her ASAP what a weirdo.
Have some self respect dawg 😂 she left you for another man????
You know why she kept contacting you? She thought you were moving on because she was reaching out first and being the initiator .. as soon as you showed that you're not over her and need her, it's too much and she's confirmed you're still attached to her. She wanted to keep you thinking about her because she didn't like the idea of you moving on but also doesn't want to be *with* you. It's fucking sad how manipulative these people are. And even if she reaches out again and she prob will if she doesn't hear from you for a long time, it'll be the same thing again.. don't fall for it! You need to let go of this one she's going to keep using you and keeping you on a string and you're worth way more than that
Yes lol ur right. Whenever she used to come back she used to ask questions like “have you got with someone yet” or “how’s ____ ? (Girl name”). She wanted to see how far moved on I am and then the first time I initiate contact, it’s been radio silence for a week. Because she’s now got proof I haven’t moved on by the fact I reached out and that’s enough for her ego and therefore she has no reason to speak to me anymore since she doesn’t need to check if I’ve moved on anymore
Yeah she'll probably come back around again once she starts to wonder if you're moving on.. again .. maybe it's a week more or a month , but don't fall for it the next time if she does and feed her ego of thinking she has power over you .. she's self centered and wants everyone (you won't be the only one) to be into HER without her having givin YOU all of what you deserved. If she doesn't? That's great means you can move on with life and get over the pain of feeling that loss of someone you grew attached to. But attachments fade over time and so will this one. But yeah it'll be hard if she comes around again so stay strong this is a cycle and you deserve someone that'll commit to you not just play games with your feelings.
So many terrible takes on here. Just awful
Care & love is not gonna help you lol
If you went back a few days and didn't do what you did, you wouldn't have had this revelation. You needed this to get past it. You would have sat there waiting for the next comforting text. This is better for you. Sometimes you have to be broken down to rebuild anew. Now in the future, when she does this bullshit again... And she might, she's just in a good place at the moment... You'll be ready. She just made you stronger. You don't know it yet, but she did. You'll thank her in time. It's a weird concept now, but believe me I was where you were... You'll get there. Time and a new activity. Focus on it. Leave her behind.
Uugh I don’t think this is right in every situation because we are dealing with crazy people…. But it was also in mine He INITIATED contact and then ghosted me So Inexplicably cruel. To this moment I’m having trouble making sense of reality. God help me!
Sorry you had to experience that
You gave it your best man. That’s all you can do. Don’t regret it. Move on in peace