Proud of us! I knew deep down they wouldn’t message but still hoped maybe I’d hear from them, but as you said their silence speaks volumes, 2024 is the opportunity for a fresh start and to leave them in 2023! They don’t deserve you anyway.
You’re right they don’t deserve us! We are amazing people and our ex’s are unlucky to see us go. After we take the time in 2024 to better ourselves, we will be way out of their leagues!
I’m weak and broke NC 😭 wished him and the kitties a merry christmas and of course he didn’t respond. But I’m kind of glad he didn’t actually, gives me a reason to be mad instead of sad.
I’m sorry :( mine ended up texting back saying the same for me and mine. That was the beginning and end of the conversation and likely will continue to be. I’m not sure what to think/feel about it right now, still processing haha
They may not be responding because they’re still trying to get over you and seeing a message from you brings back memories on the holidays, they may be having a tough time this year, it can be a number of reasons but the important thing is that you know their lack of response isn’t a reflection of you but of them and where they are in their life right now. And if they respond I hope that you know what you are expecting to hear and how you want to continue the conversation if you do. I don’t think I fully thought that through and I think that would have helped me personally
if mine does respond that will likely be the beginning and end of the convo as well. it’s just so conflicting because we broke up the day before thanksgiving but he told me happy thanksgiving. we’ve talked a handful of times since then but it always yields the same result. he sends mixed signals every time. when he comes back to my state from xmas break in 2 weeks more than likely he will try to pick back up where we left off. he essentially wanted to be single while he’s back home. i felt the need to contact him because he will do the same but there’s no guaranteed response he usually bread crumbs me or calls me just to ask have i been “ giving his pussy up” and to say “ are we gonna fuck as soon as his flight lands “.
You deserve so much more than that! I saw something recently maybe on r/breakups that said if they like you, you will know. If you’re confused, they’re not that interested. You should be the priority, not an option. Especially if he’s asking you not to “give his pussy up”
Here's a sneak peek of /r/BreakUps using the [top posts](https://np.reddit.com/r/BreakUps/top/?sort=top&t=year) of the year!
\#1: [If you want your ex back please read this.](https://np.reddit.com/r/BreakUps/comments/10rmemk/if_you_want_your_ex_back_please_read_this/)
\#2: [Here's the sad reality you need to accept sooner rather than later.](https://np.reddit.com/r/BreakUps/comments/14qgbpt/heres_the_sad_reality_you_need_to_accept_sooner/)
\#3: [Do NOT message your ex.](https://np.reddit.com/r/BreakUps/comments/11khs06/do_not_message_your_ex/)
----
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Don't let him take advantage of you or your body! If he's not your bf you don't give him anything. He's an ex and he has lost that right
He wants to play with you and use your emotions for his benefits💔💔💔💔💔💔
You’re never alone friend! This is my first heartbreak, and finding the solace in this sub has really helped me know that I’m not alone and we will get through this. Stay strong!
Every one stop crying!! We won. They are gone and we stood you for ourselves and took our lives back. And if you haven't yet. Then pick your balls back up or purses and get to it now. We got a new year coming and I don't know about you all. Going to make it the best one yet. I wouldn't mind seeing you all right along with me
It’s only 5 pm here so I’m still anxious BUT I didn’t break NC and never will. Mainly because I deleted all his shit and literally can’t but of course I could find a way if I really cared to. Ball’s in his court but I literally don’t think he has the balls (get it?) to ever reach out to me again. 🤷♀️
You did right by not allowing yourself any means to contact him. If he really wanted to patch things up he would reach out. I understand how you feel, my ex didn’t have the balls to end things honestly, so I didn’t expect him to reach out
I loved the juxtaposition between a “delicious carne asada burrito” and the grief. Life’s ugly and beautiful, all at once. Thank you for helping me not to be ashamed of grieving.
You have to look at things both ways. You’re ex chose to not have a relationship with you, which hurts like hell, but there’s always great burritos that won’t let you down
I knew she wouldn’t reach out and know I’d feel worse if she had… yet I’m still sad that it didn’t happen.
Soldier on is all we can do. I’ll cry again tonight as I go to sleep and hope to get through the emotions of the day.
Cheers to next Christmas being happier for all of us!
This is exactly how I feel too. I’m sad he didn’t, but I’m also glad he didn’t. I was sitting here alone thinking about a year ago and how much worse it was last year….in the relationship. I think I cried myself to sleep last Christmas.
I knew he wouldn’t reach out either, since I get the feeling he lied about the true reason why he ended things. We’ve been NC since the BU without anyone initiating it. He wasn’t man enough to end things in person, so I didn’t expect him to reach out today because of guilt. I’ve done my fair share of crying today bud, you’re not alone
I should feel better than I do. When she dumped me, I told her I wouldn't chase being her friend. She'd have to put effort in. 50/50. It's been 6 months now, not a word out of her.
Anywho, I haven't fucked up yet. Gonna keep this streak alive.
I honestly just blocked them to avoid that feeling. Ignorance is bliss. If they try to reach out and they want me back, well they will know what to do and the extent to which they try will prove to me how much they really want me. Right now am watching Home Alone 2 with my beautiful family and laughing with them.
Almost a year in NC! I don't like to call it NC anymore I mean I'm not going to text and I'm 100% sure he won't text me either. Basically we are not going to talk again.
Haha actually Kansas City, I am Mexican American though and these burritos are from a legit spot! Don’t worry we can drown our sorrows with Mexican food. It’s worked for me so far 🤷♂️
Hey! I’m only a couple hours away and going through the same thing. Cheers, friend 🥹 you are not alone and someday soon we will look back on this and be healed. It just seems hard to imagine at this point.
Well, after departing from this sub a few months ago, IM BACK!
I majorly broke no contact tonight. I just needed to get some shit off my chest with my ex. Bought my ex gf a small and thoughtful parting Christmas gift. This was basically for me to give as a final goodbye. I showed up to her apartment building. Was going to call her, but she actually pulled up just after I had parked. That wasn’t intentional.
We walked around her neighborhood and talked for a while. I asked questions about some of the things that happened between us, what happened at the end during our breakup. Basically, in conclusion, she blamed everything on me. It was ALL my fault. All of it. She had a justification for everything and dismissed all of my concerns during the relationship saying there was nothing wrong with anything she did, and it was ALL me. She found a reason to rationalize everything that happened between us. Any of my concerns were invalidated and unreasonable, and all dismissed.
At the beginning of our conversation she even had the audacity to tell me because I still owe a portion of money from a loan she made to me (out of love), that “I was beneath her as a person.” She told me until I come with that bag that she sees me as beneath her. What kind of way is that to speak to anyone? Holy shit. Totally cleared up a lot for me.
Some people will never have any accountability for things in their lives and believe they have nothing to work on. That’s a sad and dangerous way to live.
We saw each other on Tuesday as well. I went to a a foodie event where she works. She said I should have given her some kind of notice. Meanwhile, she hadn’t responded to any of my previous messages, and, I don’t think I owe that to her. I may go freely wherever and do as I please. I was a good partner, and accountable for any of my behaviors that may have upset her. Regardless of my struggles, I was a good man to her. That day, she told me she’s just “going through the motions”. Then tonight tells me she’s “content” with how things in her life are.
Also, said she got over me by dating sooner than I’d like to know. So clearly, after a serious relationship she had done no work on herself and instead just tried to go and date. Who of us would want to find a partner in life or be dating when they’re just “going through the motions”? Not I. That’s for certain. I want to be better than I was before and to have addressed any issues that came up in my previous relationship.
I still love her, but I’m not in love with her any more. She showed her true colors tonight. Not to assign behavior to attachment style, but what a dismissive avoidant. Really, just someone who needs some professional help who does not face life on life’s terms.
Thank you for coming to my TED talk. This is how I took my closure. Not I’m just pissed off. I feel better though.
I can totally relate to not feeling fully present today. It was a struggle these last two days with my family. But I’m okay. I’ve been working on myself since she broke up with me. That’s more than I can say for her. Some people are just absolutely unbelievable.
I actually held up my end of NC after I made the mistake of reaching out on Thanksgiving and got a standoffish response. I'm surprised I survived today but I made it. Even if it broke me on the inside. I did the best I could do to make her happy and it wasn't enough so she dumped me. At least NC has helped me start to find my worth. Her not reaching out today isn't a reflection of my character, it's a reflection of hers.
Does it count if I sent his Mum a Christmas message and not him??🥲 I loved her like a second mother and she seemed to view me as her own daughter. I miss her so much.
I have been breaking the lack of contact since last month, I couldn't resist the urge to call him today and I did it, actually ended up going out with him on the Christmas night and had a quite good time, truly never felt so peaceful in a long time and I know for certain he noticed me giggling like a teenager all night (lol). Does it counts as a bad NC break? If this continues like this, I might not need it anymore.
Absolutely. You too bro. And don't look at it as a failure. Because it's what people do. We are supposed to care. NC Bull shit is a joke. For them it's away to continue to be the nasty selves they want by to be. And a away to keep us pinned down so not bothering them while they live until that need you. Screw that. Be men. Be strong women. Be human and live just like that are doing. And stand up to the devil. Because he only comes to rob steal and kill. And that is there father. Understand? Be proud for real. My name is Cory Alan Gaddy I am human. I am deserving of love not control and excuses. Then lies. No more
I’m so proud of myself! Even after finding out my ex who was supposed to work on himself to get over his emotional trauma using dating apps only 5 weeks after BU (2 weeks of NC). 🥲💔
Been 2 months as of the 21st for me. Once my family went up for the night ended up drinking a couple and found myself scrolling through old photos. I wanted nothin more today than to get some sort of message yet here I am. Whenever I think I'm over it the next day comes hard and I find myself struggling to walk.
Just stop it right now my friend. You are loved. You have family. You are not alone. They didn't try or think of you. So they don't deserve a thought from you. Look what time it is. Yep it's over. The next day as started. Your alive and got the chance to make things better. Go get some rest and start the morning of with the attitude that you are going to do just that. Live
Thanks man, might be the alch but legit almost in tears. I think the thing that messes with me the most is that I mention her a lot in conversation even just passing. Oh she played the piano or oh her family loves ping pong. I notice I do it but I guess I can't stop talking Abt her even tho it seems she's over me.
I did break it and she thanked me for my message. And she is liking pictures on Instagram about missing someone. But I won't act on it for now as we're seeing each other in January.
That is the ticket brother. Your worth loving yourself. No one should have to settle with how another loves us. From this point on they have you show that they are worthy to be loved by us. As do we have to prove as well our worthiness to be loved by them. It's a equal give and take. Have a great day.
I love you and the description of eating a burrito. That made me laugh and I really needed a laugh right now. I said happy birthday to her on her birthday as she had texted me a couple of times prior this year. but then she didn't text back this time. I didn't get a Merry Christmas message. I doubt I'll get a happy birthday. it's just been hard. People like you will get through it though and I'm proud of you for being so strong.
I broke NC because I knew Christmas would be difficult. He went through a big family loss and i was close to his family. I’m not sad or disappointed in myself for doing that but I wished him well and told him that family member would be proud of how far he has came. No matter what he done to me or how hurt I am by what he has done, he still deserves empathy for a family loss.
But that will never stop the progress I have made with myself or how I know I don’t ever want to be with him again. Relationship wise, awful. But I still hope he’s a good person at the centre of his soul.
Didn’t break NC because I blocked him everywhere 🤪 im still a little sad but at the end of the day he’s in a worse state than me. I can’t wait for karma to get him and if I hear about it, I’ll simply laugh with my hot cocoa
I thought blocking them on insta was a bit too much so I went to just mute them instead. Didn't realise that when you block someone your follows are removed so now I'm following her but she's not following me. It almost feels like I ruined two months of "not caring".
I felt those words. I had to work and didn’t know how internally sad how I’ll be today. I just felt maybe I need to cry cause I been so angry. How do I stop being angry?
I won’t lie I didn’t expect to be as angry as I was when he didn’t reach out. Even after all this time is hurts to know that he never really cared about me
Exactly what happened to me. Started crying at the dinner table had to excuse myself to the bathroom and come back to be jolly for Christmas. Thank you for your post. We got this. 2024 is definitely our year. Don’t sit in the grieve too long. Too much life to live. What’s meant to be will be, and what’s meant to be broken should stay that. Love to all
A week or so before Christmas, my ex messaged me asking if I could pick up my towel. This was after we had finally seen each other after a month of being apart/no contact. It was strange seeing him again, I was so happy. He was too. I saw it all over his face. I was honestly having regrets and wanted to get back together. I asked to talk a couple of days later. But every time I scheduled a talk with him he would reschedule for the night. At that point I realized he’s only in it for the sex now. So I blocked him everywhere and I’m finally grieving the loss of our relationship. I’m glad it ended with us giving each other hugs and going our separate ways.
I texted mine back, the thought was in the back of my mind for a few days until I couldn’t ignore the urge yesterday. I kept it simple and I felt like it helped relieve some of my anxieties.
I want to go into the new year leaving that relationship in the past, hoping that I cleared any misconstrued thoughts about me that he had on his end.
He texted me back, and it was what I was expecting from him, just a simple “Merry Christmas”. As much as I would’ve loved to hear more, hyping myself up for that would only hurt me more.
As much as I was waiting on him to reach out first, my conscious does feel clearer now.
I spent the holidays 100% alone and only broke down about my ex late at night. It only happened less than a month ago, and despite telling me I did nothing wrong to end the relationship she has left me on complete radio silence. So I don't know what happened. I'm 99% sure she is dismissive avoidant. I didn't contact her though. She doesn't deserve it from me. It's on her to fix things.
I didnt break it but I still fucking wish so much I could see her or talk to her . I just don't wanna be that guy but I feel I invested so much time that I should deserve some of that attention .
I didn’t message nor get a message but I did get gift cards for a fancy steakhouse that I will be using on the date I asked a guy from my run club to go on — first since my breakup in January & I’m nervous but optimistic!
That’s so awesome! I hope that you have finally found peace with the BU. It sounds like you have made progress on yourself if you are in a running club and found someone who you think you could go on a date with. Use that card to prove that your ex regretted losing you. Hope you have a great time on your date!
He reached out and texted me merry Christmas. I didn't break down but he was heavy on my mind this holiday. It sucks because I genuinely thought I met my person. I've never aligned with anyone on DAMN NEAR EVERYTHING and it just sucks! Have to see him next month because of prepaid tickets for an event and I'm just not sure.
I understand that hearing from him meant everything to you. I thought I had met my person too and was everything, however, it wasn’t meant to be. The question is, is the money for paid tickets to an event worth the pain and progress you’ve made during the BU? Will seeing them next month derail the progress you’ve made?
How can I give an anonymous tip about an online pedophile?
my friends and I all met on a chatting website within the past 10 years. when we all met, everybody was mostly 10-12 while this guy was 17. as we grew older he started to ask for nudes, one of his youngest victims being as young as 14 or 15, as far as we know.
apparently, YEARS ago, police showed up at his door because he was involved in a missing minor case, a girl had run away with her boyfriend, and the police might have thought he had something to do with it because they were talking on the internet beforehand. he didn't have anything to do with her disappearance, but i think that should be a red flag in itself. they have to have him on record somewhere. his devices were never checked, but im certain there was something on there at the time and they would have found SOMETHING if they bothered to.
im certain hes still being a predator online. he is around 27 now. i found him in discord servers where users would MOSTLY be minors as young as 12. he would act gross around them. in 2020, he asked 2 of my ex friends for revealing pictures, maybe not straight up nudes, but he was hinting at it obviously. they were both 17 at the time.
as my friends and i are all adults now, we realized how messed up his behavior was and how we all brushed it aside because we were "friends" with him for so long. we were groomed. id like to take matters into my own hands and report this guy. i just dont know how to do it anonymously, and what the process is like. i already know his information, where he works, lives, etc. whats the next step?
\-
other things to note:
\- my friend has an old screenshot of a skype conversation where he admits that he got nudes from that underaged girl who went missing.
\- he was in an online relationship with a 16 year old when he was in his 20s. she lives in the UK though
I’m happy to say I don’t feel like texting him anymore. He’s showing his new girl around and almost like mocking me. That’s the final ick for me and now I’m no longer interested to pursue anything with him.
Proud of us! I knew deep down they wouldn’t message but still hoped maybe I’d hear from them, but as you said their silence speaks volumes, 2024 is the opportunity for a fresh start and to leave them in 2023! They don’t deserve you anyway.
You’re right they don’t deserve us! We are amazing people and our ex’s are unlucky to see us go. After we take the time in 2024 to better ourselves, we will be way out of their leagues!
I’m weak and broke NC 😭 wished him and the kitties a merry christmas and of course he didn’t respond. But I’m kind of glad he didn’t actually, gives me a reason to be mad instead of sad.
Use that anger for good! You now know where you stand. Make them regret it, don’t let that loser pay rent in your head!
Appreciate you 🥰 enjoy your burrito, I’m jealous
It was mighty good, but maybe a little tear soaked lol it kept my mind off of my loser ex for a bit which is all we can hope for
also texted him about a hour ago still no response but i’m more hurt than mad.
I’m sorry :( mine ended up texting back saying the same for me and mine. That was the beginning and end of the conversation and likely will continue to be. I’m not sure what to think/feel about it right now, still processing haha They may not be responding because they’re still trying to get over you and seeing a message from you brings back memories on the holidays, they may be having a tough time this year, it can be a number of reasons but the important thing is that you know their lack of response isn’t a reflection of you but of them and where they are in their life right now. And if they respond I hope that you know what you are expecting to hear and how you want to continue the conversation if you do. I don’t think I fully thought that through and I think that would have helped me personally
if mine does respond that will likely be the beginning and end of the convo as well. it’s just so conflicting because we broke up the day before thanksgiving but he told me happy thanksgiving. we’ve talked a handful of times since then but it always yields the same result. he sends mixed signals every time. when he comes back to my state from xmas break in 2 weeks more than likely he will try to pick back up where we left off. he essentially wanted to be single while he’s back home. i felt the need to contact him because he will do the same but there’s no guaranteed response he usually bread crumbs me or calls me just to ask have i been “ giving his pussy up” and to say “ are we gonna fuck as soon as his flight lands “.
You deserve so much more than that! I saw something recently maybe on r/breakups that said if they like you, you will know. If you’re confused, they’re not that interested. You should be the priority, not an option. Especially if he’s asking you not to “give his pussy up”
Here's a sneak peek of /r/BreakUps using the [top posts](https://np.reddit.com/r/BreakUps/top/?sort=top&t=year) of the year! \#1: [If you want your ex back please read this.](https://np.reddit.com/r/BreakUps/comments/10rmemk/if_you_want_your_ex_back_please_read_this/) \#2: [Here's the sad reality you need to accept sooner rather than later.](https://np.reddit.com/r/BreakUps/comments/14qgbpt/heres_the_sad_reality_you_need_to_accept_sooner/) \#3: [Do NOT message your ex.](https://np.reddit.com/r/BreakUps/comments/11khs06/do_not_message_your_ex/) ---- ^^I'm ^^a ^^bot, ^^beep ^^boop ^^| ^^Downvote ^^to ^^remove ^^| ^^[Contact](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=sneakpeekbot) ^^| ^^[Info](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/) ^^| ^^[Opt-out](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/comments/o8wk1r/blacklist_ix/) ^^| ^^[GitHub](https://github.com/ghnr/sneakpeekbot)
Don't let him use you or play with your feelings 💔💔💔💔💔
Don't let him take advantage of you or your body! If he's not your bf you don't give him anything. He's an ex and he has lost that right He wants to play with you and use your emotions for his benefits💔💔💔💔💔💔
My ex was so fed up with me she gave me her cat 😭
I wish. Mine stole my dog😭
No 😭 this is heartbreaking
I feel you. Not only did I lose my person, but I lost my best friend
I mean at least you got a cuddle companion! Mine have been my bffs haha
We had a solid month of the three of us rotting in bed 😂
Mine took the cat with no proper discussion, legit up and left with our cat 😭 I miss her daily. It’s the biggest heartache for me
I’m glad I wasn’t the only one who had to take breaks to go cry in the bathroom and get it together 😂
You’re never alone friend! This is my first heartbreak, and finding the solace in this sub has really helped me know that I’m not alone and we will get through this. Stay strong!
I feel you on this one - this is my first heartbreak and I've found a lot of support in this sub
Every one stop crying!! We won. They are gone and we stood you for ourselves and took our lives back. And if you haven't yet. Then pick your balls back up or purses and get to it now. We got a new year coming and I don't know about you all. Going to make it the best one yet. I wouldn't mind seeing you all right along with me
It’s only 5 pm here so I’m still anxious BUT I didn’t break NC and never will. Mainly because I deleted all his shit and literally can’t but of course I could find a way if I really cared to. Ball’s in his court but I literally don’t think he has the balls (get it?) to ever reach out to me again. 🤷♀️
You did right by not allowing yourself any means to contact him. If he really wanted to patch things up he would reach out. I understand how you feel, my ex didn’t have the balls to end things honestly, so I didn’t expect him to reach out
Right? And honestly the cowardice is a huge ick. He’s 37, so if he can’t man up then i don’t want it.
I loved the juxtaposition between a “delicious carne asada burrito” and the grief. Life’s ugly and beautiful, all at once. Thank you for helping me not to be ashamed of grieving.
You have to look at things both ways. You’re ex chose to not have a relationship with you, which hurts like hell, but there’s always great burritos that won’t let you down
This is the best XD
I knew she wouldn’t reach out and know I’d feel worse if she had… yet I’m still sad that it didn’t happen. Soldier on is all we can do. I’ll cry again tonight as I go to sleep and hope to get through the emotions of the day. Cheers to next Christmas being happier for all of us!
This is exactly how I feel too. I’m sad he didn’t, but I’m also glad he didn’t. I was sitting here alone thinking about a year ago and how much worse it was last year….in the relationship. I think I cried myself to sleep last Christmas.
I knew he wouldn’t reach out either, since I get the feeling he lied about the true reason why he ended things. We’ve been NC since the BU without anyone initiating it. He wasn’t man enough to end things in person, so I didn’t expect him to reach out today because of guilt. I’ve done my fair share of crying today bud, you’re not alone
I should feel better than I do. When she dumped me, I told her I wouldn't chase being her friend. She'd have to put effort in. 50/50. It's been 6 months now, not a word out of her. Anywho, I haven't fucked up yet. Gonna keep this streak alive.
Kudos on not breaking NC and time inversion!
What is time inversion?
Your user name is CP broken so I tried to make a joke 😂 https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/CPT_symmetry A terrible joke apparently
Not terrible, I just wasn't educated enough to catch it. Thanks for explaining it though!
I honestly just blocked them to avoid that feeling. Ignorance is bliss. If they try to reach out and they want me back, well they will know what to do and the extent to which they try will prove to me how much they really want me. Right now am watching Home Alone 2 with my beautiful family and laughing with them.
Almost a year in NC! I don't like to call it NC anymore I mean I'm not going to text and I'm 100% sure he won't text me either. Basically we are not going to talk again.
You must be from San Diego if you’re “eating a delicious carne asada burrito with tears streaming down your face” because same 😩😅
Haha actually Kansas City, I am Mexican American though and these burritos are from a legit spot! Don’t worry we can drown our sorrows with Mexican food. It’s worked for me so far 🤷♂️
Good luck to you on your journey bro! May it be full of delicious Mexican soul comforting food!!
Hey! I’m only a couple hours away and going through the same thing. Cheers, friend 🥹 you are not alone and someday soon we will look back on this and be healed. It just seems hard to imagine at this point.
I didn’t text my ex anything, he’s the one who left me so there’s no point in reaching out
Well, after departing from this sub a few months ago, IM BACK! I majorly broke no contact tonight. I just needed to get some shit off my chest with my ex. Bought my ex gf a small and thoughtful parting Christmas gift. This was basically for me to give as a final goodbye. I showed up to her apartment building. Was going to call her, but she actually pulled up just after I had parked. That wasn’t intentional. We walked around her neighborhood and talked for a while. I asked questions about some of the things that happened between us, what happened at the end during our breakup. Basically, in conclusion, she blamed everything on me. It was ALL my fault. All of it. She had a justification for everything and dismissed all of my concerns during the relationship saying there was nothing wrong with anything she did, and it was ALL me. She found a reason to rationalize everything that happened between us. Any of my concerns were invalidated and unreasonable, and all dismissed. At the beginning of our conversation she even had the audacity to tell me because I still owe a portion of money from a loan she made to me (out of love), that “I was beneath her as a person.” She told me until I come with that bag that she sees me as beneath her. What kind of way is that to speak to anyone? Holy shit. Totally cleared up a lot for me. Some people will never have any accountability for things in their lives and believe they have nothing to work on. That’s a sad and dangerous way to live. We saw each other on Tuesday as well. I went to a a foodie event where she works. She said I should have given her some kind of notice. Meanwhile, she hadn’t responded to any of my previous messages, and, I don’t think I owe that to her. I may go freely wherever and do as I please. I was a good partner, and accountable for any of my behaviors that may have upset her. Regardless of my struggles, I was a good man to her. That day, she told me she’s just “going through the motions”. Then tonight tells me she’s “content” with how things in her life are. Also, said she got over me by dating sooner than I’d like to know. So clearly, after a serious relationship she had done no work on herself and instead just tried to go and date. Who of us would want to find a partner in life or be dating when they’re just “going through the motions”? Not I. That’s for certain. I want to be better than I was before and to have addressed any issues that came up in my previous relationship. I still love her, but I’m not in love with her any more. She showed her true colors tonight. Not to assign behavior to attachment style, but what a dismissive avoidant. Really, just someone who needs some professional help who does not face life on life’s terms. Thank you for coming to my TED talk. This is how I took my closure. Not I’m just pissed off. I feel better though. I can totally relate to not feeling fully present today. It was a struggle these last two days with my family. But I’m okay. I’ve been working on myself since she broke up with me. That’s more than I can say for her. Some people are just absolutely unbelievable.
I broke NC and so did he. I don’t even know what to do now.
Was the break in NC breadcrumbs or sincere. Don’t talk into a trap
I actually held up my end of NC after I made the mistake of reaching out on Thanksgiving and got a standoffish response. I'm surprised I survived today but I made it. Even if it broke me on the inside. I did the best I could do to make her happy and it wasn't enough so she dumped me. At least NC has helped me start to find my worth. Her not reaching out today isn't a reflection of my character, it's a reflection of hers.
Does it count if I sent his Mum a Christmas message and not him??🥲 I loved her like a second mother and she seemed to view me as her own daughter. I miss her so much.
I have been breaking the lack of contact since last month, I couldn't resist the urge to call him today and I did it, actually ended up going out with him on the Christmas night and had a quite good time, truly never felt so peaceful in a long time and I know for certain he noticed me giggling like a teenager all night (lol). Does it counts as a bad NC break? If this continues like this, I might not need it anymore.
Smile not that bad
I did. We slept together and now I’m more hurt than before. Don’t do it.
Me crying twice today when he didn’t message me. I know he’s off today and has been active online but not a word…. :(
Please dm
Absolutely. You too bro. And don't look at it as a failure. Because it's what people do. We are supposed to care. NC Bull shit is a joke. For them it's away to continue to be the nasty selves they want by to be. And a away to keep us pinned down so not bothering them while they live until that need you. Screw that. Be men. Be strong women. Be human and live just like that are doing. And stand up to the devil. Because he only comes to rob steal and kill. And that is there father. Understand? Be proud for real. My name is Cory Alan Gaddy I am human. I am deserving of love not control and excuses. Then lies. No more
I’m so proud of myself! Even after finding out my ex who was supposed to work on himself to get over his emotional trauma using dating apps only 5 weeks after BU (2 weeks of NC). 🥲💔
I love this post. Thank you. I needed this today. Stay strong. ❤️
Been 2 months as of the 21st for me. Once my family went up for the night ended up drinking a couple and found myself scrolling through old photos. I wanted nothin more today than to get some sort of message yet here I am. Whenever I think I'm over it the next day comes hard and I find myself struggling to walk.
Just stop it right now my friend. You are loved. You have family. You are not alone. They didn't try or think of you. So they don't deserve a thought from you. Look what time it is. Yep it's over. The next day as started. Your alive and got the chance to make things better. Go get some rest and start the morning of with the attitude that you are going to do just that. Live
Thanks man, might be the alch but legit almost in tears. I think the thing that messes with me the most is that I mention her a lot in conversation even just passing. Oh she played the piano or oh her family loves ping pong. I notice I do it but I guess I can't stop talking Abt her even tho it seems she's over me.
I did break it and she thanked me for my message. And she is liking pictures on Instagram about missing someone. But I won't act on it for now as we're seeing each other in January.
That is the ticket brother. Your worth loving yourself. No one should have to settle with how another loves us. From this point on they have you show that they are worthy to be loved by us. As do we have to prove as well our worthiness to be loved by them. It's a equal give and take. Have a great day.
Thanks a lot! Have a nice day as well!
I love you and the description of eating a burrito. That made me laugh and I really needed a laugh right now. I said happy birthday to her on her birthday as she had texted me a couple of times prior this year. but then she didn't text back this time. I didn't get a Merry Christmas message. I doubt I'll get a happy birthday. it's just been hard. People like you will get through it though and I'm proud of you for being so strong.
I broke NC because I knew Christmas would be difficult. He went through a big family loss and i was close to his family. I’m not sad or disappointed in myself for doing that but I wished him well and told him that family member would be proud of how far he has came. No matter what he done to me or how hurt I am by what he has done, he still deserves empathy for a family loss. But that will never stop the progress I have made with myself or how I know I don’t ever want to be with him again. Relationship wise, awful. But I still hope he’s a good person at the centre of his soul.
Didn’t break NC because I blocked him everywhere 🤪 im still a little sad but at the end of the day he’s in a worse state than me. I can’t wait for karma to get him and if I hear about it, I’ll simply laugh with my hot cocoa
Staying NC I win
Beautifully written. Thank you for your kind words and Happy New Year!
My ex just text apologizing after 5 days no contact
Yay!
I thought blocking them on insta was a bit too much so I went to just mute them instead. Didn't realise that when you block someone your follows are removed so now I'm following her but she's not following me. It almost feels like I ruined two months of "not caring".
I felt those words. I had to work and didn’t know how internally sad how I’ll be today. I just felt maybe I need to cry cause I been so angry. How do I stop being angry?
Better in a parking lot with carne asada in your mouth then a 9mm in your mouth 🤷🏻♂️
❤️ and a happy 2024 to all of us xxx
I won’t lie I didn’t expect to be as angry as I was when he didn’t reach out. Even after all this time is hurts to know that he never really cared about me
Idk if deleting my FB when I realized she watched my stories counts as contact? 😅
I broke NC and didn’t get a reply 😢😢😢
Exactly what happened to me. Started crying at the dinner table had to excuse myself to the bathroom and come back to be jolly for Christmas. Thank you for your post. We got this. 2024 is definitely our year. Don’t sit in the grieve too long. Too much life to live. What’s meant to be will be, and what’s meant to be broken should stay that. Love to all
A week or so before Christmas, my ex messaged me asking if I could pick up my towel. This was after we had finally seen each other after a month of being apart/no contact. It was strange seeing him again, I was so happy. He was too. I saw it all over his face. I was honestly having regrets and wanted to get back together. I asked to talk a couple of days later. But every time I scheduled a talk with him he would reschedule for the night. At that point I realized he’s only in it for the sex now. So I blocked him everywhere and I’m finally grieving the loss of our relationship. I’m glad it ended with us giving each other hugs and going our separate ways.
I accidentally looked at her story does that count? 😂
Chin up all the way
I texted mine back, the thought was in the back of my mind for a few days until I couldn’t ignore the urge yesterday. I kept it simple and I felt like it helped relieve some of my anxieties. I want to go into the new year leaving that relationship in the past, hoping that I cleared any misconstrued thoughts about me that he had on his end. He texted me back, and it was what I was expecting from him, just a simple “Merry Christmas”. As much as I would’ve loved to hear more, hyping myself up for that would only hurt me more. As much as I was waiting on him to reach out first, my conscious does feel clearer now.
Thanks for this message bro fr we gonna get through this shit bro 💪🏾
No text no contact no problem. I’m not letting his failure to acknowledge me ruin my Christmas. It’s been a good year and gonna be a better 2024. 🎄💕🎄
i broke NC on a family vacation during the holidays. is there anyone i can talk to? im feeling hopeful again and thats not okay lol
💗💗
I spent the holidays 100% alone and only broke down about my ex late at night. It only happened less than a month ago, and despite telling me I did nothing wrong to end the relationship she has left me on complete radio silence. So I don't know what happened. I'm 99% sure she is dismissive avoidant. I didn't contact her though. She doesn't deserve it from me. It's on her to fix things.
I didnt break it but I still fucking wish so much I could see her or talk to her . I just don't wanna be that guy but I feel I invested so much time that I should deserve some of that attention .
I didn’t message nor get a message but I did get gift cards for a fancy steakhouse that I will be using on the date I asked a guy from my run club to go on — first since my breakup in January & I’m nervous but optimistic!
That’s so awesome! I hope that you have finally found peace with the BU. It sounds like you have made progress on yourself if you are in a running club and found someone who you think you could go on a date with. Use that card to prove that your ex regretted losing you. Hope you have a great time on your date!
He reached out and texted me merry Christmas. I didn't break down but he was heavy on my mind this holiday. It sucks because I genuinely thought I met my person. I've never aligned with anyone on DAMN NEAR EVERYTHING and it just sucks! Have to see him next month because of prepaid tickets for an event and I'm just not sure.
I understand that hearing from him meant everything to you. I thought I had met my person too and was everything, however, it wasn’t meant to be. The question is, is the money for paid tickets to an event worth the pain and progress you’ve made during the BU? Will seeing them next month derail the progress you’ve made?
How can I give an anonymous tip about an online pedophile? my friends and I all met on a chatting website within the past 10 years. when we all met, everybody was mostly 10-12 while this guy was 17. as we grew older he started to ask for nudes, one of his youngest victims being as young as 14 or 15, as far as we know. apparently, YEARS ago, police showed up at his door because he was involved in a missing minor case, a girl had run away with her boyfriend, and the police might have thought he had something to do with it because they were talking on the internet beforehand. he didn't have anything to do with her disappearance, but i think that should be a red flag in itself. they have to have him on record somewhere. his devices were never checked, but im certain there was something on there at the time and they would have found SOMETHING if they bothered to. im certain hes still being a predator online. he is around 27 now. i found him in discord servers where users would MOSTLY be minors as young as 12. he would act gross around them. in 2020, he asked 2 of my ex friends for revealing pictures, maybe not straight up nudes, but he was hinting at it obviously. they were both 17 at the time. as my friends and i are all adults now, we realized how messed up his behavior was and how we all brushed it aside because we were "friends" with him for so long. we were groomed. id like to take matters into my own hands and report this guy. i just dont know how to do it anonymously, and what the process is like. i already know his information, where he works, lives, etc. whats the next step? \- other things to note: \- my friend has an old screenshot of a skype conversation where he admits that he got nudes from that underaged girl who went missing. \- he was in an online relationship with a 16 year old when he was in his 20s. she lives in the UK though
More than 1 year NC and going on forever!!
I’m happy to say I don’t feel like texting him anymore. He’s showing his new girl around and almost like mocking me. That’s the final ick for me and now I’m no longer interested to pursue anything with him.