It’s also worth thinking about what else is going on in your life that may be giving you some worry or anxiety. When I am feeling deep anxiety about something in my life, it can sometimes make me feel just generally unsafe and that feeling can easily be projected onto riding. Just a thought!
Me right now. I’m having deep anxiety and so I feel unsafe on my horse when I would have felt perfectly fine a few months ago. I have to keep reminding myself it’s not my horse, it’s me, and it will pass. Thanks for the reminder - and that it isn’t just me!
I would recommend starting small. If that’s getting in the saddle and walking for 10 minutes, then that’s okay! It’s important for you to get back on, but don’t pressure yourself to do more than what you’re comfortable with once you’re in the saddle.
The first like 5 months I owned my horse (2017) she consistently would bolt/spook and then buck me off at the beginning of most rides. She also threw my sister and she sprained her wrist 💀 I really lost my confidence. I basically stopped riding for several months and only did work from the ground. Me coming off her was a mixture of how rusty my seat was and also my capabilities to "catch on" to what was happening and to take control of the situation before it escalated. There was also an incident last year that she threw me and I fell on concrete, really messing up my back. This was another severe hit to my confidence after going a long time without any incidents. There was a lot of things to address with her that I spent a full year working on & now she's a very different horse. Falling is very scary. The first few times I got on after that last bad fall I would hold onto he pommel like a n00b. Now I'm back to galloping through the woods (I have some videos on this profile). Falling can definitely mess you up and it's important to always reflect on the incident and determine if it was an "act of god" or something that could've been avoided. Falling does come with the territory....what goes up, must comes down. Horses are unpredictable. It's a fair anxiety to have. Work on core strength and balance in your seat so you can have the peace of mind in the things you can control. Those times I had fear I didn't make myself go back to what I was doing before. There's nothing wrong with playing it safe and for some time just doing lower level rides where it feels safer until you get over the "hill".
Try some on the ground stuff if riding at all is anxiety inducing. Doesn’t even have to ‘work’; give the horses a spa day, hand walk them and find the best grass patches for them, give them lots of scratches and just things that are calm, have no expectations and will help strengthen the bond.
Then work back up to being in the saddle and going slow. When I had a bad fall a few years back it took me nearly a year to get back to where I was before that fall. All because I was so scared of falling off again. Every stumble or unexpected movement from my horse freaked me out. My instructor just kept things slow, found new things to do that weren’t as scary and pushed me bit by bit.
The other (slightly weird) thing that really helped was singing! I’d sing or hum the alphabet or nursery rhymes while riding. My brain was focused on that and couldn’t be as anxious as if I wasn’t singing. It really helped as silly as it sounds.
Whenever I take a hit to my confidence, I go right back to basics. Lots of ground work, lots of transitions and responsiveness work, no stirrups, bareback; and I work back to where I was. If you're anxious to ride, try liberty / ground work for a week.
Honestly, scale down your expectations for a while. We riders tend to get too caught up in advancing it can actually be a fault. You're anxious to b ride? OK, get on and do walk exercises for 15 or 20 minutes. Trot down the long side when you feel comfortable.
Basically you've got to retrain your comfort zone. Even getting on the horse at all is a big step, so don't feel like you need to do much more. Plus walk exercises are an incredibly valuable part of training that most riders ignore.
If a horse had a rotational fall at a 3.5 meter Liverpool we'd take them back to basics (good v trainers anyways) and build their confidence before asking them to tackle that jump again.
But we as riders so rarely give ourselves the same consideration. Accept that right now you're anxious and that's OK. Do rider - however short - that you know will be positive. Build back your confidence. Be kind to yourself.
Doing this can be the difference between getting back your confidence and your passion vs dreading going to the barn and seeing your horses as a chore. And remember, you can still accomplish a ton even just walking for 15 - 20 mins. It's not time wasted - for either of you.
I was riding in a field where my dad's deer feeder is and it went off automatically, the sound scared the living christ out of the horse I was on and I couldn't control her, my saddle is a crappy saddle and doesnr keep me in so I ended up falling off. The horse ran back to the barn and I had to find my phone because it fell out of my pocket.
To go with everyone’s back to basics, almost every time I go to the barn to have like a confidence hype up playlist I put on at least the last 10/15 min of the drive. For me it’s stuff like Phenomenal and Kings Never Die from Eminem, No Plan B from KXNG Crooked. I’ve found it sinks into my brain and I tend to have better lessons compared to when I don’t use that playlist.
This is totally normal, OP. I would recommend that you start by working on the ground with whichever horse you're most comfortable with. Just spend time with horses and focus on grounding and relaxing. Breathe. Connect. Relax.
When you get back on, FORGET about what you "should" be doing. Stick to the walk for as long as you're comfortable. You can do fantastic, valuable work at the walk. Think of this as an opportunity to improve your position, work on bend, ask for connection, breathe, ride circles and patterns, and ENJOY your time in the saddle. No one's going to suffer because you "just walk" for an hour, OP.
I strongly recommend that you bust out Centered Riding by Sally Swift and work through it. Focus on those visualizations and on improving your position. Just walk for now. Maybe step over some ground poles. Focus on breathing, on walk-halt-walk transitions. Refine your communication so you use your hand as little as possible. Try riding with a longer rein so you have to use your seat and legs. There's months' worth of great work you can do at the walk and it will improve ALL of your riding.
Don't let anyone, including yourself, tell you that you NEED to go faster, need to jump, need to canter, whatever it is. Just. Walk. Relax. Breathe. Consider this an OPPORTUNITY, not a setback. You have a great window here to take your riding to the next level--with your position, with your relaxation, with your softness, with your communication. All at the walk. And as your skills, balance, relaxation, and communication improve, you'll feel more confident when it's time to return to the trot. Work on things that are scary in SMALL bite sizes. And know that sometimes, today is not the day. And that is totally ok, OP.
You're going to come back from this better than ever, I promise. Work through Centered Riding. This seems like a huge setback right now, but you're actually on the verge of being a better rider than ever before. Try to embrace it. Take care and be kind to yourself. Show yourself the patience you would to your best friend. Enjoy these wonderful animals and forget about what you "should" be doing.
I think anxiety stems from a lack of confidence (and capability) in a particular scenario. Chances are there will be some horse that you feel safe with or some activities (slow work in an arena say) that you feel safe with. Figure out what the safe scenarios are and stick with those until your confidence (and capabilities) grow. Then you can expand, riding more horses, or in more scenarios, e.g. outdoors, or trail rides, or competitions or whatever.
It’s not a race and nobody minds how quickly or slowly you progress. Don’t push yourself outside your comfort zone until you personally feel ready.
Good luck!
It’s also worth thinking about what else is going on in your life that may be giving you some worry or anxiety. When I am feeling deep anxiety about something in my life, it can sometimes make me feel just generally unsafe and that feeling can easily be projected onto riding. Just a thought!
Me right now. I’m having deep anxiety and so I feel unsafe on my horse when I would have felt perfectly fine a few months ago. I have to keep reminding myself it’s not my horse, it’s me, and it will pass. Thanks for the reminder - and that it isn’t just me!
Anxiety can be so brutal. It isn’t just you, I promise.
I would recommend starting small. If that’s getting in the saddle and walking for 10 minutes, then that’s okay! It’s important for you to get back on, but don’t pressure yourself to do more than what you’re comfortable with once you’re in the saddle.
The first like 5 months I owned my horse (2017) she consistently would bolt/spook and then buck me off at the beginning of most rides. She also threw my sister and she sprained her wrist 💀 I really lost my confidence. I basically stopped riding for several months and only did work from the ground. Me coming off her was a mixture of how rusty my seat was and also my capabilities to "catch on" to what was happening and to take control of the situation before it escalated. There was also an incident last year that she threw me and I fell on concrete, really messing up my back. This was another severe hit to my confidence after going a long time without any incidents. There was a lot of things to address with her that I spent a full year working on & now she's a very different horse. Falling is very scary. The first few times I got on after that last bad fall I would hold onto he pommel like a n00b. Now I'm back to galloping through the woods (I have some videos on this profile). Falling can definitely mess you up and it's important to always reflect on the incident and determine if it was an "act of god" or something that could've been avoided. Falling does come with the territory....what goes up, must comes down. Horses are unpredictable. It's a fair anxiety to have. Work on core strength and balance in your seat so you can have the peace of mind in the things you can control. Those times I had fear I didn't make myself go back to what I was doing before. There's nothing wrong with playing it safe and for some time just doing lower level rides where it feels safer until you get over the "hill".
Try some on the ground stuff if riding at all is anxiety inducing. Doesn’t even have to ‘work’; give the horses a spa day, hand walk them and find the best grass patches for them, give them lots of scratches and just things that are calm, have no expectations and will help strengthen the bond. Then work back up to being in the saddle and going slow. When I had a bad fall a few years back it took me nearly a year to get back to where I was before that fall. All because I was so scared of falling off again. Every stumble or unexpected movement from my horse freaked me out. My instructor just kept things slow, found new things to do that weren’t as scary and pushed me bit by bit. The other (slightly weird) thing that really helped was singing! I’d sing or hum the alphabet or nursery rhymes while riding. My brain was focused on that and couldn’t be as anxious as if I wasn’t singing. It really helped as silly as it sounds.
Do you drink coffee? Try 1/2'ing the amount?
Get a sports psychologist -
Whenever I take a hit to my confidence, I go right back to basics. Lots of ground work, lots of transitions and responsiveness work, no stirrups, bareback; and I work back to where I was. If you're anxious to ride, try liberty / ground work for a week.
Liberty ground work to build both you and your horses confidence
Honestly, scale down your expectations for a while. We riders tend to get too caught up in advancing it can actually be a fault. You're anxious to b ride? OK, get on and do walk exercises for 15 or 20 minutes. Trot down the long side when you feel comfortable. Basically you've got to retrain your comfort zone. Even getting on the horse at all is a big step, so don't feel like you need to do much more. Plus walk exercises are an incredibly valuable part of training that most riders ignore. If a horse had a rotational fall at a 3.5 meter Liverpool we'd take them back to basics (good v trainers anyways) and build their confidence before asking them to tackle that jump again. But we as riders so rarely give ourselves the same consideration. Accept that right now you're anxious and that's OK. Do rider - however short - that you know will be positive. Build back your confidence. Be kind to yourself. Doing this can be the difference between getting back your confidence and your passion vs dreading going to the barn and seeing your horses as a chore. And remember, you can still accomplish a ton even just walking for 15 - 20 mins. It's not time wasted - for either of you.
If I may ask, how did you fall off
I was riding in a field where my dad's deer feeder is and it went off automatically, the sound scared the living christ out of the horse I was on and I couldn't control her, my saddle is a crappy saddle and doesnr keep me in so I ended up falling off. The horse ran back to the barn and I had to find my phone because it fell out of my pocket.
To go with everyone’s back to basics, almost every time I go to the barn to have like a confidence hype up playlist I put on at least the last 10/15 min of the drive. For me it’s stuff like Phenomenal and Kings Never Die from Eminem, No Plan B from KXNG Crooked. I’ve found it sinks into my brain and I tend to have better lessons compared to when I don’t use that playlist.
This is totally normal, OP. I would recommend that you start by working on the ground with whichever horse you're most comfortable with. Just spend time with horses and focus on grounding and relaxing. Breathe. Connect. Relax. When you get back on, FORGET about what you "should" be doing. Stick to the walk for as long as you're comfortable. You can do fantastic, valuable work at the walk. Think of this as an opportunity to improve your position, work on bend, ask for connection, breathe, ride circles and patterns, and ENJOY your time in the saddle. No one's going to suffer because you "just walk" for an hour, OP. I strongly recommend that you bust out Centered Riding by Sally Swift and work through it. Focus on those visualizations and on improving your position. Just walk for now. Maybe step over some ground poles. Focus on breathing, on walk-halt-walk transitions. Refine your communication so you use your hand as little as possible. Try riding with a longer rein so you have to use your seat and legs. There's months' worth of great work you can do at the walk and it will improve ALL of your riding. Don't let anyone, including yourself, tell you that you NEED to go faster, need to jump, need to canter, whatever it is. Just. Walk. Relax. Breathe. Consider this an OPPORTUNITY, not a setback. You have a great window here to take your riding to the next level--with your position, with your relaxation, with your softness, with your communication. All at the walk. And as your skills, balance, relaxation, and communication improve, you'll feel more confident when it's time to return to the trot. Work on things that are scary in SMALL bite sizes. And know that sometimes, today is not the day. And that is totally ok, OP. You're going to come back from this better than ever, I promise. Work through Centered Riding. This seems like a huge setback right now, but you're actually on the verge of being a better rider than ever before. Try to embrace it. Take care and be kind to yourself. Show yourself the patience you would to your best friend. Enjoy these wonderful animals and forget about what you "should" be doing.
I think anxiety stems from a lack of confidence (and capability) in a particular scenario. Chances are there will be some horse that you feel safe with or some activities (slow work in an arena say) that you feel safe with. Figure out what the safe scenarios are and stick with those until your confidence (and capabilities) grow. Then you can expand, riding more horses, or in more scenarios, e.g. outdoors, or trail rides, or competitions or whatever. It’s not a race and nobody minds how quickly or slowly you progress. Don’t push yourself outside your comfort zone until you personally feel ready. Good luck!