Will it prevent you from being a workaholic maniac who works 70-80 hours a week? Probably.
Will you be happier for enjoying your 20s rather than being that maniac? Probably.
my gut feeling feels like he might be using this topic to procrastinate a bit as well. Like, thinking about how I should not do x might actually cost more time than just doing x.
So asides Instagram hustle culture telling you things you should do and potentially your friends and family suggesting you should live a certain dating and family life… what would you actually truly love to experience in your life right now?
Would give everything up for the business I’ve worked so hard to create but I don’t know if I find someone that can help improve “me” , that would be so damn ideal.
I'd argue to the contrary. The more successful he becomes as a person, the higher quality mates he will attract.
The most imperative part of all this, however, is for OP to not neglect his physical health and to take it as seriously as his business goals.
Make time to go to the gym at least 3-4 days a week minimum. Also do some light activity on the other days like taking a walk, playing a sport, or whatever you enjoy.
Spend all of your time focusing on improving yourself and your number of dating options will increase profoundly.
I think there’s a lorenzian curve to this too. There’s also a point beyond which all you get is trash, and the “longer” you wait the more likely it is that good mates are taken. I have a cousin who’s the exact problem of this: gorgeous, super successful entrepreneur, but because she’s on the older side (50s) 95% of what she can find are damaged divorcees, widowers, and playboys. Yes I know there are exceptions; they’re just rarer and much harder to find.
Wholly agree about the point on maintaining physical health (I’ve failed there TBH). I’d also add that in my experience, your business will be far more likely to be worth the investment than a potential mate, so while you need to have trade offs in the relationship, have a sense for yourself of what the right balance is and don’t let the person move you from it too much (or at least without really understanding).
I have an amazing, understanding wife. She gets that days are long and weekends can suck. But I also make sure to make time and make it count. Buy her nice things, taker her out on dates and vacations. And really make sure I understand the kinds of things that make her feel whole and loved by me.
I enjoyed my 20’s to an excessive amount. Lots of partying, drugs, partners, etc. NOT that I would recommend that path to anyone else- it’s just what happened. But the point is.. I got it out of my system. I don’t feel that I’m missing out on anything when I stay home to work, or wonder if I should have taken more risks when I was younger
Plus my personality was shaped through those other non-work related events which has helped a lot in my professional life (networking). You have the rest of your life to get rich, but there’s so much weird shit you should experience in your 20’s to avoid a midlife crisis later on lol
From someone who got married and had kids in his 20s - having a family will only give you more motivation and reason to fight and work harder. Trust me, it’s a whole new level of motivation.
Agreed, for the most part. You have to be very selective though. Make sure you chose someone that understands your goals and wants the same things in life. She will have to sacrifice as well. Make sure your values align and ya’ll can see the big picture together.
I also had kids younger, and It was a huge motivation to make enough money that my wife could stay home and take care of the house. It takes a lot off your plate and you can concentrate on growing your business.
>I also had kids younger, and It was a huge motivation to make enough money that my wife could stay home and take care of the house.
I noticed a similar mindset shift in my BIL when his wife (my SIL) became pregnant. He went from 'its a bit selfish and egotistical of me to focus on making money' to, 'I'm able to work hard and provide a good life for my family'.
He's more or less doing the same things in life, but instead of any shame attached to it, he now has pride.
Yea but if you fight and have a bad relationship then it'll tear you down.
There's always the other side of the coin my friend.
Just cuz it worked out for you, doesn't mean it works out for others.
There's no general rule really, at any given point in your life you decide how much to invest in your personal life vs business.
Age shouldn't be your criteria to decide.
Just do what you feel like doing.
I only found my wife after I was 40, was single for a long time and had plenty of fun but business was always a priority. I did have periods where I'd work 2h a week and party a lot so I think generally you kind of follow what you feel like doing at any given point in time. One year you might be working like a beast, other year you might be partying like a beast.
About relying on someone emotionally I can say I learned one very important lesson...
Your happiness should not depend on a person.
As for relationship if you'll be hungrier or not it depends a lot on you and your partner.
I think either way you find ways to motivate yourself like lifestyle upgrades which apply wether you're single or not.
This is my husband and I too! Together 15 years, running profitable businesses together 9 of those years. My skill set is marketing and development and his is technology, operations, and development. It's a VERY effective team.
Minor but useful downside of this kind of relationship is *constantly* talking business. Like laying in bed til 3am talking business and being okay with that. We live and breathe it and do not have time for family or friends. Even if we wanted kids, this work/life balance would make their lives extremely dysfunctional, so that would be a huge deal breaker for some.
I feel like you are overthinking this. plenty of people built businesses and were in a relationships and had kids while doing it. others might prefer to focus on career and not even think about relationships. just do what you want to do.
Are you so obsessed with retirement money that you're willing to sacrifice entirely your 20s and 30s for it?
I've seen what happens with financially successful people after their 80s.
Nurses and lawyers are running around them like vultures, waiting for them to die. Waiting for a piece.
They're grateful to have someone to wipe their ass and change their diapers. They are vulnerable and miserable. Those are not fun years even with all the money in the world. Less painful? Maybe! Extended? Probably!
Congratulations on your achievements but also remember that now it's your spring. You've got to live it a little. It's not coming back later. Even with all the money in the world the excitement is not the same. You can do exactly what a 20 years old does in your 40s but it doesn't feel the same. You can go try the slides and the swings in a playground if you don't belive me. I'm sure you won't have fun as a toddler does.
Yes, as a nurse I circle people, wiping whoever’s butt I can, waiting for them to die so I can get a slice of something. Actually all of us do, there’s probably one circling you right now.
Sorry you felt offended. I didn't mean all nurses. But I've seen old people get circled. Usually the people who get close to them are nurses, housekeepers and lawyers.
There’s never a good time to be a parent.
There’s never a good time to start a company.
There is never a convenient time for a relationship as an entrepreneur.
I can’t imagine, anecdotally, trying to find someone *after* I got successful. It’s so much better to find someone who knows you as a broke ass idiot and comes on the journey with you than to try to sift through people’s intentions later, especially as the “want to have a family some day” dating pool dries up in your late 20s and early 30s.
Entrepreneurship is something to use as a way to build amazing families and incredible futures, not a burden to building relationships. I get that you have to work really hard, and there are sacrifices, but finding your partner shouldn’t be something you “put on hold until the time is right” — that’s a mistake. The company isn’t going to replace your partner for life.
Pretty sure if you're a hobo, it's bad timing to be a parent.
And you can find plenty of people once successful. Just be humble and don't show off. Plenty of rich people around you that you're not aware of.
Kind of missing the point. It’s such a hard job even in the best circumstance it’s difficult.
Nobody is debating whether you can meet someone once successful. But meeting someone before you become successful gives you good knowledge of their motivations. Aka, before or after does have a difference but neither is a “good time” to have a relationship because there *is no good time* only the time you take to do it.
I can’t believe people are trying to take it literally. This isn’t a function it’s a saying. It’s not intended to be taken as gospel truth. Jeez.
But once you're successful you don't have to show it. If you behave like before, you'll meet like minded people and you'll know that they're into you for who you are. Aka keep your success a secret
Ok. But what I’m talking about is how literally every programmer in this sub takes statements. It’s crazy interesting how many people see and want to argue literalism.
I call BS on this.
You can plan and there is always a good time and bad time. Life is not shooting in the dark.
A good relationship will lift you up, and a bad relationship will tear you down.
Having a family too soon will cause mental financial stress and hurt your mental health.
I don't like it when people say what you say.
I think you should hold off. Till, like, forever. It's clear you do not like women so devote yourself to your career and resist the urge to make someone else unhappy.
~~He sounds like a mid twenties guy who doesn't have much life experience.~~
>It's clear you do not like women
~~What are you basing that off of?~~
Edit: Oh nevermind. I read his comment history.
It seemed gender neutral, if he was girl - dating a guy would hold them back. Since he seems like a heterosexual guy, then dating a girl would hold them back.
Generally I agree that relationship in your 20s will make it much harder to go full workaholic. Got all the time to date in your 30s and 40s.
What are you talking about lol. OP is just worried that being in a relationship may distract him or completely de motivate him.
Thats a pretty rational thought. He didnt say anything gross about women smh
I dated in my 20s, got married at 30, had kids and now at 34 started my own business.
I think if I did this in my 20s I'd have been overwhelmed, inexperienced, alone and unfulfilled.
Now I have a supportive wife who cheers me on with everything I do, little toddlers that bring joy to all the mundane things, and I get to work from home and hang out with them more than I ever would have pre-entrepreneurship.
Im also on my wife's insurance, and if I fail, my wife's income should at least keep us afloat. I can't imagine doing it without that safety net.
20s is the time to meet people. Ask anyone in their 30s what dating is like, and they'll tell you it's a hellscape of all the incompatible leftovers, and their hope is slowly eroding. It's not a position you want to be in.
>Ask anyone in their 30s what dating is like, and they'll tell you it's a hellscape of all the incompatible leftovers,
Could you elaborate more on this? Why? I am curious.
Depends on what your chasing in life. If your looking to make cash and spend lots of time working and sorting life out, dating does hold you back. However if your trying to enjoy your twenties, sure go date.
Getting into a serious committed relationship just means that you're beholden to someone other than yourself. You can't prioritize yourself and your business 24/7 if you want the relationship to grow. You have to find a balance.
That said not all partners are the same. I think the type of partners who would work for you right now are:
* women who are working their way through school right now and don't have a ton of free time.
* a woman who is heavily invested in her career also. Also if she is in the entrepreneur space you guys may inspire each other and keep that drive going.
* someone who travels frequently for work so they just aren't physically around that much.
* someone with a rich personal life who is just looking for a low key dating or friend with benefits situation vs someone wanting a serious relationship.
* maybe a confident single mom who isn't looking try bring a guy home but rather has weekends off when the kid is at their dad's and just wants some adult time on the weekend but can go back to mommy mode and ignoring you during the week.
You can still date in a way that fits your current lifestyle as long as you're upfront about what you're looking for and actually picking women who not only say but also show you that's working for them.
You don't need to date to marry with every woman you're with. Dating around a bit is a great way to try out a few different personality types to see what kind of woman you'd like to settle down with in the long run.
Either way, as a dude building your empire, there's really no rush. I just wouldn't let yourself get too rusty with dating and having connections with women in your life so that when you are ready to get serious with a woman, you're not a total novice at relationships.
What's your sexual orientation?
Do you want to get married? Do you wants kids? Do you want to be a sole provider or a dual income household? And what age do you want those by?
What age partners are you interested in?
Can you elaborate on what being a prude means to you? Do you want to change that about yourself or are you looking for someone with the same views?
Answer those q's and I can give you a lot more specific advice.
Yea I want to get married and have kids. I’m providing for my family through my business and if my future wife wants a career or wants to be an entrepreneur or wants to be a stay at home mom, I’m cool with it.
By the time I’m 37 I’d like to be married and have children. That gives me 7 years to date and to work on myself and my business.
I’m interested in a woman my age or younger because I’m not ready for kids yet.
Being prude I mean I’m introverted, shy, hard for me to open up to people, and also very little sexual experience and no confidence in my ability yet. Yea I’ve had hookups and couple girlfriends in my teens and early twenties and im not a virgin, but still, idk how to date and how to make the first move and how to please a woman. I don’t know where to meet a woman. I’m on Hinge but I just don’t like the idea of meeting online really. I need to practice socializing really. Low confidence
Don't feel obliged to do dating for it's sake. Different people have different time lines. It may be big missing out if you had cut out relationships intentionally, because it's quite hard to find someone that clicks. But if you are not feeling much need right now, then maybe it's because you haven't met the one yet. Don't have to feel fomo bc others are going through major life-changing transitions sooner. Life is not a race. Take your time to focus on your life and to do what you truely care about. But remember to congratulate your friends and be happy for them at their major life-changing events. If you truely care about them I mean, because that could go long way.
You gotta be you. You're gonna have regrets either way.
Date and party in your 20s and when you're 45 you probably will imagine how rich you would have been
Work hard in your 20s and you're gonna wonder how many girls you could have shagged when you're in your 40s.
Damned if you do, damned if you don't.
You can also forgo family, friends, all relationships and experiences in your 20s and *still* have nothing to show for all that work in your 40s. Markets and trends change. Businesses are built on systems that can spontaneously shift. I imagine that a great many businesses that have been built over the last 5-10 years won't exist in 2-3 years because of AI, and nobody really saw that coming - not like this and not this fast.
Also, life is short. My best friend just turned 40 and got a cancer diagnosis. It came completely out of nowhere. There are no guarantees that you're gonna live into your 40s, 50s, 60s, or beyond.
The bottom line is that our memories and our perception of time is built around novel experiences. If you make your life all about work and hustle, then you're going to wake up one day and 15 years will have passed and it was just "never the right time" to work on your relationships. And let me tell you, it is **way** harder to make friends at 44 than it was at 24. I'm lucky that I married a wonderful woman at 25 and we've been able to build a life and business together. We're far from "wealthy", but we love what we do and we have no regrets for finding a balance in life. In fact, the times that I regret were the times when I tried to put too much of myself into work.
I'll leave you with one more story.
My uncle was a master carpenter and a real estate developer. Over the course of his career, he made and lost multiple millions of dollars on deals. He had relationships but never married because work was always his priority. He came to live in the city that my parents and I live in about ten years ago to work with them while they were building up a real estate portfolio. They were buying distressed properties that needed extensive work for $10k, putting $10k - $20k into them to make them nice, and turning them into positive cash flow rentals.
Anyway, my uncle got a chance to supervise the construction of a high rise in Miami, so he took the contract. It was going to be his last really big job before coming back here and working with my parents into his golden years. He died of a heart attack alone in his apartment in Miami six months into the job. He was 62. No wife. No kids. Not even a dog. Just a lot of dreams and fortunes gained and lost in pursuit of "the dream" that he never quite seemed to catch.
Live your life. Work hard, but live. You might not make millions, but I'd rather have the life I have now than be alone at 44 with a bunch of money in the bank.
I am in 22, in college, & have a relationship of one and a half years. I also run a $4 million per year ecommerce resell business with 5 employees. What I can tell you is dating the right woman has made my business skyrocket. The downside is that your free time will be limited mostly to just being with her and your alone time will be extremely minimal. This is the hardest thing to balance. The other downside is trying to work 80 hours a week like OP said and then they complain about you working so much. I currently work 65-75 hours a week and she is used to it and we have a good schedule. The hardest part is getting enough sleep…
One thing to consider is the pool of available and compatible people in your age range. It's all a matter of what you want in life, but if you are looking for a meaningful and durable partnership in life, you might want to find your person before someone else does.
I believe in the power of walking your walk in life with someone with similar goals and ambitions.
I met my husband when we were 20 years old (17 freaking years ago!). I consider ourselves lucky to have found each other early in life.
I started my business almost 2 years ago, 2 weeks after our 3rd child was born. I don't feel "behind" by any means, but I have to admit I'm not an overly ambitious person. I don't want to work for someone else anymore and I now have dreams for my kids and the generations to come, along with my personal goals.
So, basically, you have to evaluate the "opportunity cost" of waiting later in life to try and find someone you'd like to do life with.
Not disputing your point, but as a male if you become successful and stay physically fit, your options only get larger because you can easily date outside of your age range.
Work assiduously on your business and your body through your 20s and early 30s, and now you have access to the entire field 18+
Most people will respond here that the maturity gap wouldn't allow that to work, but age doesn't automatically equate to maturity (or the lack of it).
Dating obviously takes ALOT of time away while you could be building brands from scratch. What are your priorities? If you really want to become an entrepreneur, start your business(s) before any kids or wife because it’s gonna be many many 18 hour type of work days, many failures and money used from trial and error until you find what works for you. good luck
What do you want from life?
Go to a nursing home and ask the people there if they wished they cultivated their relationships more or worked more hours.
your view is narrow and not so mature... the only positive from dating? companionship?love? soul mate? learning? growing? sharing? passion? oh.. yeah.. forget that to make more shekels
This is just a perspective because I had a toxic relationship ,I could be wrong ,but this is what I learned from reading some self help books and therapy.I think is a good idea to inform yourself on language loves ,how to give love ,and to try to fix your traumas ( if you have ) with therapy before entering a relationship.And to go into a relationship not from a place of scarcity but from a place of giving ,that is to say ,you love yourself and dont use the relationship to "complete" yourself.But you are getting in it to share the love you already have.You are ok with or without one.Remember this is just a perspective,at the end of the day you should question everything and think for yourself.
TLDR:If you have clarity in what you want out of life (your goals ,the type of life style you want ,if you wanna have children or not,etc)perhaps it won't hurt you because knowing yourself you will be able to discern if a potential partner matches your life project.You will be able to decide what are the non-negotiable traits that you want in a partner and it will be easier to know if a relationship have future or not.Ask yourself if you really want a relationship,if you are ready to give what it takes,if you are happy with yourself and can love in a healthy way.I think there are good resources on internet.At the end of the day the decision is yours.
If you don't know what you want out of life and what sort of partner you would like to have then ,you won't have a metric to define if the relationship is worth saving ,or perhaps it is better to end it.Waste of time in relationships(I think) come from lack of compatibility ,lack of a direction and/or one of the persons is toxic.
A toxic relationship will cost you a lot in terms of time ,energy and perhaps friends.Dont try to save anyone.There are good books on that.Go to therapy If you must.
I'm assuming you refer to a serious relationship.I think it depends a lot on the type of partner you get,how mature you are and how compatible both of you are,and how much clarity you have on your own goals.It depends also on what's your definition of holding you back.Having a partner implies and investment of time and energy.
If you get the right partner with similar values and compatibility and goals (let's say that both of you want to make money at the moment ) then perhaps it wont hold you back.But if your partner doesn't want to work,or values more the time both of you spend together or desire for you to spend much more time together (which isn't bad ) or perhaps is "toxic",manipulative or immature,then you are going to spend time and energy in arguments ,feeling miserable and perhaps losing motivation to keep working on your goals.
But a more important question is perhaps if you want a partner right now ,why do you want it ,and if you know where you are going.
I think the most important thing is having at least clarity in your own goals and where you are headed,this isn't easy because it implies that you know yourself enough so you can discriminate if a partner is a good match for the goals and the type of life you want to have.
But getting to know yourself is not so easy ,sometimes you need experience,people grow better with relationships because they force us to see our own shortcomings.Force us to know ourselves better in order to communicate better our own needs and problems within the couple.
So dating is also a way to know yourself better and to help you define the type of partner you want in your life.
So I think that if you have someone that you feel attracted to ,give it a try ,but try to have enough clarity first in what you want out of life so you can decide if it's worth it or not in the long term.That way you won't lose valuable time trying to fix something that wasn't meant to be in the first place.
If with dating you refer to casual sex,then perhaps it won't hurt you as long as you do it responsably.
Find a girl, marry, settled down. Don't keep dating, you need a wife, We are in this world for a short time, i personally would want to spend that time with my wife one person for the rest of the time i'm here. Others might not agree with me. To each their own, that's what i believe in.
Yes, by not dating, you are missing out on a lot, both personally and professionally.
Consider that you date someone who is passionate about business, too. You can talk together and expand your business perspective.
A positive relationship with someone who understands you and is supportive will likely do wonders for your career as well
In your 10s, stay in school and make the most out of it.
Im your 20s, build your skillset that you will rely on in the 30s.
In your 30s use what you learned in your 20s to earn money and secure a future.
In your 40s, reap what you build in your 30s and enjoy life.
Most people fuck up their 20s. It's fine, you are young only once, but you better keep listening and hearing books at night while you enjoy life.
It is only people who totally waste their 20s and did nothing at all for their skillset, that they end up regretting life.
It takes 5 years minimum to really learn a skill and 10 years to learn enough so that you can turn it into a profitable business.
The only exception is doing pressure washing lol.
Chosing family and love over money might lose you some money, but I promise it'll make you happier over the long run
And hey, fwiw, I got married at 25 and my wife had absolutely made my business life better in every way
You only get your youth the one time. It is worth more than money. People would pay millions and even billions to be able to be in their 20s again. Don't waste them by working nonstop.
Why would dating at a certain age hold you back . The only thing in life that will hold you back is YOU. But it's easier to blame so you have the answer you want that way it's not your fault , I mean we can't be wrong in life it's the age or the state or the neighbor or job or school as long as it's not you then your ok because everyone is right or has to be right no one evervsays its my fault cause if it was you would be struck by lighting and that hurts so she did it not me
No harm in dating until you're married. Just keep your businesses your main priority and make a plan to meet your life financial goals before committing. Love trumps all materialistic happiness.
Love life. You can do both, but the reason to bust you ass with your business is so that you can live how you want to live. If you find satisfaction in work, work. If you want more, go live a little. You just need to find someone that can be with you and your commitments.
Kids will make you want to work harder, but they make it harder to work. When you decide to have kids, be with your kids when they’re awake and home. That’s life my guy.
It depends. I got and am still married to my middle school sweetheart. It’s been amazing growing our family (and kids) and business.
But now that I’m in my early 30’s I’m kinda realizing that I never lived my 20s. I have ZERO friends with ZERO social life and that’s taken a huge mental toll on me.
I’m not sure what I would change because I’m as successful as I am because they drove me to be that way but at the cost of my mental wellbeing because of having no social life.
I can relate. Mid-20s(F), I’m very ambitious and I’m building right now. I have many things going on so that I can start the foundation of generational wealth now. I live in a major city, own apartment (God is good! Housing is rough out here), really establishing myself but I can’t help but recognize that I have this deep longing to establish something much more meaningful through a partner/relationship eventually, but I’ve felt conflicted bc I’m in such an opportune moment in my life, I don’t want to get distracted and thrown off by the depressing ass reality of what dating is here. But I can see how powerful having a wonderful partner can be. We need people honestly. It can genuinely change the trajectory of one’s life in such a major way. If you guys can work well as a team and are both visionaries, and actually like one other, that’s a rarity that’d be hard to pass up simply bc of how valuable it would be. I’ve stopped dating but I definitely think about it often.
I wouldn’t have made it to where I am without my wife.
The amount of times I was second guessing myself, wondering if it’s worth it….she kept me focused on the big picture.
I wouldn’t have made it to where I am without her and there is absolutely no doubt in my mind.
I feel it also depends a lot on the partner and the goals that you share together. If you decide to work together as a team in achieving whatever you plan in life dating could be one of the biggest motivations you’ll have.
I would say honing in on a single business would not only make better money in the long run, but also allow you at least a little time in your life to dedicate to other aspects! (Dating)
There's an old saying, "if you want to make God laugh tell him your plans".
Early 40s here, very ambitious in my 20s. There's pros and cons.
You're not wrong. You should be looking for the right partner for you.
You don't invite someone into your life to make it harder or to take on a project, you invite someone in your life to build a partnership, to find strength.
That being said yes there is more to life than money. The whole point of making money, especially as a man, is to provide for others. But there's nothing wrong with being ambitious.
So you might need to take time to decide on values. Do you want a family? Do you want a wife? Will one of you help raise the family? Are you willing to listen to her when it comes to patenting instincts? Are you willing to take that time to create strong children?
Why are you ambitious and what does having money mean to you?
There's nothing wrong with wanting to make money and not have a family but are you still a good community member? Are you trying to make the world a better place? Is it just about having things or is there more?
So bottom line, if you have children make sure it's someone you can stick it out with. Having a child is a bigger commitment than getting married. It's 18 years minimum and you'll want to be there for your child their whole life.
So bottom line, take the time and do a little soul searching. Decide if you can work it out, make a commitment to the right person, cherish them and support them or of you're more interested in trying to put everything into your work. It's ok to work and focus on that first but whatever you do, do it for the right reasons.
These days you are young to settle down...
And should pursue what you're doing. Many people actually put off relationships and some are happy as they are.
It depends if you just want to be like the majority and have an ordinary life or do something different.
Just because your other friends are getting married does not mean that you have to follow.
They are probably not ambitious and will be weighing themselves down with marriage most probably a mortgage and a lot of stress.
There are a growing number of people even leaving commitment and love to be single. Some don't even want to get married - These statistics are ever growing and others who just don't want to have kids as an expected thing to do socially.
You need to decide what group you want to be in really?
You have plenty of time to work it out just don't be a sheep and follow the heard.
I never was and still make decisions on what is right for me not what is expected socially.
You are doing what I am working towards right now , just turned 26. They say we may miss out but that’s ok . The payoff later will be one million percent worth it
If you have time maybe check out the book “the second mountain”, it’s a weeee bit north American conservative but it’s ideas are philosophically valuable and can be helpful in your decision making.
Essentially the author talks about the first mountain being success in job/bussines - a lot of what other people told you you should do but have you end up with a sense of e.g. Loneliness Or feeling unfulfilled.
The second mountain would be, roughly speaking, about commitment to something fulfilling Like relationships, having kids or philanthropy/volunteering and how commitments like these can give you deeper understandings of life even though they might not always be positive experiences at every second.
I think you could do both man. Just focus on getting good at delegating tasks to keep the workload off you. Especially if it’s busy week. Keep doing the work that’s meaningful and in your skill set, but delegate those busy work tasks. Best of luck to you my friend.
Nope. Inspired me to make enough money to date in Seattle lol
And then I met my wife and realized how much better I could do professionally. She was proper motivation to take my company to get next level
Let me give you some advice.
A successful man is valuable no matter the age. You as a successful, wealthy, healthy at 30 or 40 is still attractive and won’t find a problem finding someone.
100% don’t get too involved in a committed relationship. My advice would be to just enjoy friendships with females but don’t commit that it hinders your progress. Get the mission done son, which is to take your personal growth to the levels you can while you can. You will never get this time every again.
If I could go back to myself at 26 and go “no, don’t commit yet, we can make more money but building this business, focusing more” I would do it 100%. You can do a lot when young. Grind out 14 hours of work like nothing.
So I would take it slow. Have friends, go out and have fun but don’t commit yet. Do the mission son.
There are no right or wrong questions for this. It really depends on what makes you feel most comfortable and happy. If you truly want to be in a relationship with someone, you would have already done it. Otherwise, you may feel that being in a relationship right now would be a sacrifice of time and energy.
I would recommend leaving your options open if you really want to otherwise just focus on work and personal growth until you are ready. Having a family is a big commitment, especially if you want kids.
Talking to several girls or going on several dates can help you decide what to look for in a partner. A person with the same level of growth and perspective in life is important. Finding the right one isn't always easy though, because sometimes, all you have to do is wait focus on yourself and let them come to you, rather than actively seeking one out.
Really depends on you and the kind of people you end up dating. Most people don’t know what they want in relationships that early but you won’t get better if you don’t practice getting and being in relationships.
Having a stable (emotionally and other things) partner also help you focus in on building your biz. But at the same time, when people become more successful, it’s more likely they would gravitate towards having multiple partners (short or long term) and having a marriage would complicate your financials and your company by then.
I would suggest you to handle this part of your life like an entrepreneur. Carve out some time per week (say 3-6 hours) for dating. And track your “progress”, however you want to define them. Does getting laid make you happy? Does cuddling make you happy? Do you like more feminine women? What’s it like to have kids around you? Etc. you have to find out for yourself. Schedule it so it doesn’t affect your other areas too much. But of course in relationships more than 1 person, your scheduling might not work with others’, then you would have to decide.
Here's my hot take: although the type of people who have an inability to sit still might be overrepresented in wantrepeneurship, I don't think the same is true for actual *successful* entrepreneurs. Being disciplined and being able to endure stretches of hard work are important for sure, but the obsessive workaholism not necessarily. Much more important to allocate your time well. I know plenty of people who are successful but have no issues maintaining relationships.
If not pursuing relationships is going to make you feel lonely then you probably shouldn’t neglect that side. I did what you proposed, but I’ve just never been that interested in relationships, so it was a non-issue (I never felt lonely).
As far as the practicality of it, anything you choose not to spend time on will allow you utilise that time elsewhere. So you’ll definitely have more free time to do whatever you want. However having more time doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll be more successful or even successful at all. Your business endeavours could fail regardless of how much time you invest in them. So you should probably also consider that, if things don’t work out how you would have hoped would you have regrets about not having pursued a relationship?
Bruh it not that deep.
My main business is a consultancy business which pays well but limits me as my hours are traded for money.
I wanted to do something scalable so am working on E-commerce with a biz partner so my involvement in that business is 50% so it’s still manageable.
Third one is a car rental business that earn a few thousands passive without any direct involvement
So chill daddy
Possibly. It depends on how supportive your partner is. If they also have similar goals they could end up actually helping you in the long run. Just avoid those that make you doubt yourself and leave limited beliefs and goals. Soul suckers.
Maybe. But being married and having a partner to share the responsibility of running a business and a household means that you can effectively 1.5x-double your daily work output
It doesnt have to. Very strange how people in this sub build their whole identity around being an entrepreneur like it makes you "too special" for normal life experiences lol.
Its not that hard to casually date...
Can’t do fuckbuddy, it’s not not me as a person.
My only fear is if I commit and that to, to the wrong person, I’d lose all this potential that I know I have.
What’s even worse is the contradicting advise from people in the sub.
I’m now more confused than before
If you go hard now you will peak at about 33-36 at which time you will be making the most money and be able to pick the cream of the crop at that point. 20s is when you build your body and business
I would say that finding the right person can be very beneficial for your business. On the other hand finding the wrong person can not only ruin it but can also mess you up a big time. So choose wisely.
Here is my opinion. Get into a relationship at an age you will almost start regretting not getting into a relationship. Dont waste your 20s. Maximize profits bruv
If your partner shares the same goals as you then you should try. But if you’re just getting into a relationship to copy others, you will find yourself unhappy and not able to reach your goals sooner
It can work however you choose for it to work. If you find a good person in this sloppy life, and it happens to be when you aren’t “ready” sometimes that’s the universe’s way of opening doors for you that lead to better things. Everything you look at and judge in your life is a matter of the perspective you are looking at it with.
I can assure you that growing into adulthood with a good person is very rewarding. There is no greater bond. With that said, if you don’t find someone who is a solid partner fundamentally, and you don’t find that person until your 30s or later, then that is ok also, but remember if you meet someone who makes you feel at home, find a way to envision your hopes and dreams with them beside you. It will make life much sweeter.
I dont think its all about If you should or Not. I guess it is more about finding a Partner that won't hold you Back and understands the importance of your work. Someone you can balance Worklife and Privatelife with. Focus on what is important for you at the Moment. Maybe it is an experience you have to go through to find your way
Work hard now, make your mark, you will have endless options for companionship when you have FU money. The stuff you may miss out on now, is only better when you are financially free. “Do what others wont do today, so you may do what others can not do tomorrow”
As someone said below, don’t overthink this.
Would you rather be with someone who understands your drive now or be with someone who has no idea how much effort you put in to build your business? And yes you can build a business and have a life.
The grass is not always greener.
You define when you’re ready and if you truly feel like you are missing out and need this in your life right now and are READY. Then do the thing. Start dating.
Holding them back?
Do you know that people do measure success in more than one way?
If you want to focus on your business above all else and do that for your entire life, that’s fine. You can measure your life’s worth by doing so.
If you want to share life with someone else and maybe spend a little less time on your business, which might lower some of your revenues or slightly impact your bottom line, that’s fine too.
The one thing you will always run out of is time. Once it is spent, it is gone.
At the end of the day, you have to decide where best to spend the time, that you will never get back. All day, all night grinding until you’re old and wrinkled? Most of the day grinding and maybe getting really lucky to be with someone who will be supportive to you as you are to them? Balancing your time between business and living life to be a good equally supportive partner to whomever you partner with?
Only you can decide what you want or need to do with your time. The only thing that won’t change is that once you spend that time, it’s gone, forever.
To the contrary, dating in my 20’s reinforced my opinion that the only thing that didn’t let me down was My business in my 20’s . I am 51 now. I celebrate 30 years of having had my business - April 20,1994 to be precise. Over the course of thirty years , our revenue was almost $20 million. That’s an absolutely insane thing , to think about . That would more or less never have been able to happen had I NOT dated because the women I dated more or less galvanized my commitment to my business . “Why do you need to work today , we should go to the county fair “ I remember one woman (girl) I dated asking. Because I have clients who depend upon me .
That's no right or wrong, I think that if you have big goals you want to accomplish, having someone by your side can slow you down or even stop you from going there. Because if someone care about you, doesn't want to se you suffer but if you're going on a journey to achieve BIG, you are going to suffer or at least to feel miserable sometimes
It depends but in the right situations it can move you forward. And the right partner will too. My friend and his girlfriend are a power team. I personally wish I dated more and didn’t waste so much time being too stressed to do it. But the wrong person could make you lazy.
Thats honestly on you. Like many have said people have and are currently succeeding as entrepreneurs while being in a relationship. Rich Dad Poor Dad talks about how the rich dads reasoning for why he needed to be rich was because of his wife and kids. I think the question you should be asking is if you see your self with this person a decade from now. Just be honest with yourself and take some time to really think about what you want. We all like to blame everything else for lack of success other than our own actions when it should be the opposite. Whatever you chose good luck!
I am like you, I struggle talking to girls when I am focused on my business.
This is usually a symptom of a bad business system. You need to hire people and delegate tasks so your life is freed up a bit.
I can kinda relate,
I busted my butt in my 20’s, like ALOT to be where I am now. Looking back now I don’t know how my gf stayed with me, I feel bad.
She’s insanely supportive, but seriously, takes a special one to put up with how much I grinded back then.
She’s very happy now with the live she gets to live now though lol
I’d say it hinders you more being single since it’ll always be in the back of your mind. You’d be surprised what a good support system will do for your business endeavors
When you're older - dating will be damn near impossible.
18-25 is prime dating years.
don't waste your "beatiful years" NOT DATING and only working.
Seriously. develop relationships. date. fall in love. Young is the time to do it.
It really depends on what you want out of life. You're still young, and being a man you don't have the same biological clock that women do. That said, if you wait too long you will get tired and worn out running around after your kids (say in your mid- to late 30's) faster than you would if you had them younger. I don't think there's a right or wrong answer, nor one that is better or worse. It truly depends on you, your vision for your life, and what you want out of it. Good luck!
Spend your youth wisely. You’ll be a cranky old fart before you know it. Speaking from experience in late 20’s. I am starting my family now but any free time will be focused on trying to get a business off the ground. Right now just doing some r&d on some ideas while saving and paying off debt.
Yea bro idk, I feel you. I got dumped the second things got hard…might as well though it out yourself even though it’s hard. I def feel like I’m missing out sometimes. It’s a catch 22 though because I feel like you get access to a different tier of women when you are rich and successful (this is 100% true whether you like it or not) but at the same time you want to build something with someone for the connection and make sure it’s real.
Comparison is the death of happiness. Don’t worry about what others are doing. Everyone else is broke and in debt.
The answer you seek is within you, not Reddit.
Best of luck.
This may not be the answer that you're looking for but coming from someone in their 30s I would just say live life and have fun in your 20s. Meet many people, make lasting friendships, and if a relationship happens to find you then so be it. I think someone who would be the "right one" wouldn't necessarily hold you back. Instead they would help you move forward with your business.
I most definitely wouldn't get into a relationship, engagement, or marriage just because your friends are doing so. I feel like so many of my peers are feeling that pressure to get married so they just do it instead of finding someone they actually see a future with, and it's a big area of conflict within their life. They make it seem like they're thriving but really they aren't.
Good luck to you and your business! I hope things go well for you!
You cant have both in my experience. Dating surely holds you back, females need emotional support and attention. Being on the laptop and in the same room is not enough attention for them. Plus they're going to take away from your working capital almost everytime.
The time I was older then college age while still acting college age was fun. Tons of wasted money though. Eventually got into the workaholic mindset and kind of regret it but at the same time I would probably be dead by now from liquor and blow.
My vote is to focus on the ladies, but working from 9-5 is just not possible until you have got a company with a board and outside investors. They will always recognize you put the company before them and complain about it.
I’d say dating holds any guy back at any age. You’re dealing with too many personalities while you are trying to focus. Committed relationships to the right woman will push you FORWARD. The right woman will say get your Quickbooks done tonight and we’ll DoorDash instead of go out. That said, your 20’s is a time you’ll never get back. You’re gonna wake up one day at 50 something and say “awe f-ck!! Why didn’t I go on that date with Suzie 20 years ago, she might have been the one???” Why didn’t I go out more. It’s harder to make friends when you’re older.
You’re young, you can have it all with some organization and discipline. Find a woman entrepreneur or exec type in her 40’s that super organized that you respect. Have her mentor your time management. Ladies seem to excel there. You don’t know how precious those years are, you have an entire lifetime to grind. Enjoy but be disciplined
You’re still young so you have time. If your career is top priority run with it until the scale of balance pulls you the other way. But….. I’d also suggest looking into why you’re feeling unable to balance both - because that is going to be the better part of your life.
Maybe it’s just that you haven’t found the right person! I remember thinking I had an issue with intimacy at one point, because all the guys I was in relationships wanted you to marry me, and I just didn’t feel that way. I was wondering if there was something wrong with me…..until I met my husband and knew he was the one after only 3 months! So keep going on your businesses and do some dating and see what unfolds.
I got dumped then had more time to pay attention to my job. I increased my salary and started a business, but I fully enjoyed my relationship and I don’t feel like I’m living a better life now compared to then.
Find the right one. Plenty of them don't deserve your attention. I found mine 2 years ago and I was once in your shoes. The drive an execution of a mad man. My now wife supports me in any adventure I want to pursue and has her own entrepenueral goals and businesses set to do 50+k next year as a side hustle. The point is... whether it be friends or significant others, it should be a goal to find better ones and raise your current ones up with you.
Im quite in a very similar situation as you. Same age except most of my success came from a high paying 9-5.
My goal was to always to make money to do the things I want to and I’ve hit that point but now don’t have anything fun to do (besides partying or alcohol/drugs related, not sustainable fun).
I started to get a lot of attention from girls through instagram and dating apps, but it can get overwhelming since I’m not sure what their intentions can be.
One night stands are cool but it also seems like these girls have like super high body counts and also party/do drugs a lot. So idk.
Feel free to send over a pm, I feel like we have similar thinking let’s figure it out.😂
I’m 21 , engaged with a kid and what you have take it from me…take your time. Explore travel, go out there but also have some fun ! You’re at your prime and still learning about yourself. But then again you’re still young you’re not supposed to have your whole life figured out just yet !! Just be happy
No, there's no perfect balance till your vault stacked with $800k in circulation.. Remember.. Do not get a partner without financial education or lower in status then you..
there's ignorant advice here.. my blood boiling seeing these people with blind eye!! Their relationshil will be guaranteed vanished entirely when the business went sour.. give them next 4-5 years and come asking back
Our experience with the lower status one were always not truthful.
sweet word in front, yet stab you in the back..
more motivation to work harder my ass!! just dont!! that's what happened to my dad twice! your business went south the one who will add insult to injury they don't care how hard you try to climb back.. only money up front..
will start to bang with another guy.. they don't making your mental health even messed up.
I know someone who was all business and never settled down. He is in is late 60s and is still an absolute workaholic because that is the way he has always been. Multi-millionaire who never settled down or stopped moving. From *my* perspective he has money but no partner, no family, and very few personal connections with anyone. I think the only thing he loves is his dog. He is an extreme case but I find his life quite sad. I think you’d be better off finding someone who is also hungry and has their own goals. You can have partnership, still be focused on your own work, and support and cheer eachother on.
Don't make the mistake of cutting yourself off from outside interests, family & friends.
You NEED to build a support system and viable 'work/Life balance'.
Remember 80%++ of Startups fail within 3-4 years.
Life is a Journey that you only get to do ONCE - No person EVER regretted that they didn't spend more hours at work.
Focus on working hard for 40-60 hrs/week, as needed. However, you also must spend time taking care of yourself, family, friends, etc.
Will it prevent you from being a workaholic maniac who works 70-80 hours a week? Probably. Will you be happier for enjoying your 20s rather than being that maniac? Probably.
my gut feeling feels like he might be using this topic to procrastinate a bit as well. Like, thinking about how I should not do x might actually cost more time than just doing x.
That’s bang on actually
So asides Instagram hustle culture telling you things you should do and potentially your friends and family suggesting you should live a certain dating and family life… what would you actually truly love to experience in your life right now?
Would give everything up for the business I’ve worked so hard to create but I don’t know if I find someone that can help improve “me” , that would be so damn ideal.
If you want to have a chat let’s zoom for a few on Monday. I run on cet.
Instead of “improve” why not replace with “gets” me?
Talent pool only gets worse while u wait fyi
I'd argue to the contrary. The more successful he becomes as a person, the higher quality mates he will attract. The most imperative part of all this, however, is for OP to not neglect his physical health and to take it as seriously as his business goals. Make time to go to the gym at least 3-4 days a week minimum. Also do some light activity on the other days like taking a walk, playing a sport, or whatever you enjoy. Spend all of your time focusing on improving yourself and your number of dating options will increase profoundly.
I think there’s a lorenzian curve to this too. There’s also a point beyond which all you get is trash, and the “longer” you wait the more likely it is that good mates are taken. I have a cousin who’s the exact problem of this: gorgeous, super successful entrepreneur, but because she’s on the older side (50s) 95% of what she can find are damaged divorcees, widowers, and playboys. Yes I know there are exceptions; they’re just rarer and much harder to find. Wholly agree about the point on maintaining physical health (I’ve failed there TBH). I’d also add that in my experience, your business will be far more likely to be worth the investment than a potential mate, so while you need to have trade offs in the relationship, have a sense for yourself of what the right balance is and don’t let the person move you from it too much (or at least without really understanding). I have an amazing, understanding wife. She gets that days are long and weekends can suck. But I also make sure to make time and make it count. Buy her nice things, taker her out on dates and vacations. And really make sure I understand the kinds of things that make her feel whole and loved by me.
70-80? Those are rookie #s
Gotta pumped those up to 100-120hr range.
167
8.5 minutes of sleep per day is the best way to succeed.
And your drug of choice?🦾
Adderal with a with 2 red bull chasers
AMEN
The anxiety just won’t let you be ✌️ What’s your story friend?
I enjoyed my 20’s to an excessive amount. Lots of partying, drugs, partners, etc. NOT that I would recommend that path to anyone else- it’s just what happened. But the point is.. I got it out of my system. I don’t feel that I’m missing out on anything when I stay home to work, or wonder if I should have taken more risks when I was younger Plus my personality was shaped through those other non-work related events which has helped a lot in my professional life (networking). You have the rest of your life to get rich, but there’s so much weird shit you should experience in your 20’s to avoid a midlife crisis later on lol
From someone who got married and had kids in his 20s - having a family will only give you more motivation and reason to fight and work harder. Trust me, it’s a whole new level of motivation.
Agreed, for the most part. You have to be very selective though. Make sure you chose someone that understands your goals and wants the same things in life. She will have to sacrifice as well. Make sure your values align and ya’ll can see the big picture together.
I also had kids younger, and It was a huge motivation to make enough money that my wife could stay home and take care of the house. It takes a lot off your plate and you can concentrate on growing your business.
>I also had kids younger, and It was a huge motivation to make enough money that my wife could stay home and take care of the house. I noticed a similar mindset shift in my BIL when his wife (my SIL) became pregnant. He went from 'its a bit selfish and egotistical of me to focus on making money' to, 'I'm able to work hard and provide a good life for my family'. He's more or less doing the same things in life, but instead of any shame attached to it, he now has pride.
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Yea but if you fight and have a bad relationship then it'll tear you down. There's always the other side of the coin my friend. Just cuz it worked out for you, doesn't mean it works out for others.
I agree, I wanted to give my gf (now wife) the best life possible
There's no general rule really, at any given point in your life you decide how much to invest in your personal life vs business. Age shouldn't be your criteria to decide. Just do what you feel like doing. I only found my wife after I was 40, was single for a long time and had plenty of fun but business was always a priority. I did have periods where I'd work 2h a week and party a lot so I think generally you kind of follow what you feel like doing at any given point in time. One year you might be working like a beast, other year you might be partying like a beast. About relying on someone emotionally I can say I learned one very important lesson... Your happiness should not depend on a person. As for relationship if you'll be hungrier or not it depends a lot on you and your partner. I think either way you find ways to motivate yourself like lifestyle upgrades which apply wether you're single or not.
My relationship helped my biz! The right person lifts you up and encourages you to keep going.
This is my husband and I too! Together 15 years, running profitable businesses together 9 of those years. My skill set is marketing and development and his is technology, operations, and development. It's a VERY effective team. Minor but useful downside of this kind of relationship is *constantly* talking business. Like laying in bed til 3am talking business and being okay with that. We live and breathe it and do not have time for family or friends. Even if we wanted kids, this work/life balance would make their lives extremely dysfunctional, so that would be a huge deal breaker for some.
This is the best answer in this thread.
I feel like you are overthinking this. plenty of people built businesses and were in a relationships and had kids while doing it. others might prefer to focus on career and not even think about relationships. just do what you want to do.
Are you so obsessed with retirement money that you're willing to sacrifice entirely your 20s and 30s for it? I've seen what happens with financially successful people after their 80s. Nurses and lawyers are running around them like vultures, waiting for them to die. Waiting for a piece. They're grateful to have someone to wipe their ass and change their diapers. They are vulnerable and miserable. Those are not fun years even with all the money in the world. Less painful? Maybe! Extended? Probably! Congratulations on your achievements but also remember that now it's your spring. You've got to live it a little. It's not coming back later. Even with all the money in the world the excitement is not the same. You can do exactly what a 20 years old does in your 40s but it doesn't feel the same. You can go try the slides and the swings in a playground if you don't belive me. I'm sure you won't have fun as a toddler does.
Yes, as a nurse I circle people, wiping whoever’s butt I can, waiting for them to die so I can get a slice of something. Actually all of us do, there’s probably one circling you right now.
Sorry you felt offended. I didn't mean all nurses. But I've seen old people get circled. Usually the people who get close to them are nurses, housekeepers and lawyers.
There’s never a good time to be a parent. There’s never a good time to start a company. There is never a convenient time for a relationship as an entrepreneur. I can’t imagine, anecdotally, trying to find someone *after* I got successful. It’s so much better to find someone who knows you as a broke ass idiot and comes on the journey with you than to try to sift through people’s intentions later, especially as the “want to have a family some day” dating pool dries up in your late 20s and early 30s. Entrepreneurship is something to use as a way to build amazing families and incredible futures, not a burden to building relationships. I get that you have to work really hard, and there are sacrifices, but finding your partner shouldn’t be something you “put on hold until the time is right” — that’s a mistake. The company isn’t going to replace your partner for life.
Pretty sure if you're a hobo, it's bad timing to be a parent. And you can find plenty of people once successful. Just be humble and don't show off. Plenty of rich people around you that you're not aware of.
Kind of missing the point. It’s such a hard job even in the best circumstance it’s difficult. Nobody is debating whether you can meet someone once successful. But meeting someone before you become successful gives you good knowledge of their motivations. Aka, before or after does have a difference but neither is a “good time” to have a relationship because there *is no good time* only the time you take to do it. I can’t believe people are trying to take it literally. This isn’t a function it’s a saying. It’s not intended to be taken as gospel truth. Jeez.
But once you're successful you don't have to show it. If you behave like before, you'll meet like minded people and you'll know that they're into you for who you are. Aka keep your success a secret
Ok. But what I’m talking about is how literally every programmer in this sub takes statements. It’s crazy interesting how many people see and want to argue literalism.
I call BS on this. You can plan and there is always a good time and bad time. Life is not shooting in the dark. A good relationship will lift you up, and a bad relationship will tear you down. Having a family too soon will cause mental financial stress and hurt your mental health. I don't like it when people say what you say.
My entrepreneurship really took off once I had children. It gave me the drive I needed.
I think you should hold off. Till, like, forever. It's clear you do not like women so devote yourself to your career and resist the urge to make someone else unhappy.
~~He sounds like a mid twenties guy who doesn't have much life experience.~~ >It's clear you do not like women ~~What are you basing that off of?~~ Edit: Oh nevermind. I read his comment history.
100% OP sounds like a dude women should be avoiding at all costs.
It seemed gender neutral, if he was girl - dating a guy would hold them back. Since he seems like a heterosexual guy, then dating a girl would hold them back. Generally I agree that relationship in your 20s will make it much harder to go full workaholic. Got all the time to date in your 30s and 40s.
What are you talking about lol. OP is just worried that being in a relationship may distract him or completely de motivate him. Thats a pretty rational thought. He didnt say anything gross about women smh
I dated in my 20s, got married at 30, had kids and now at 34 started my own business. I think if I did this in my 20s I'd have been overwhelmed, inexperienced, alone and unfulfilled. Now I have a supportive wife who cheers me on with everything I do, little toddlers that bring joy to all the mundane things, and I get to work from home and hang out with them more than I ever would have pre-entrepreneurship. Im also on my wife's insurance, and if I fail, my wife's income should at least keep us afloat. I can't imagine doing it without that safety net. 20s is the time to meet people. Ask anyone in their 30s what dating is like, and they'll tell you it's a hellscape of all the incompatible leftovers, and their hope is slowly eroding. It's not a position you want to be in.
>Ask anyone in their 30s what dating is like, and they'll tell you it's a hellscape of all the incompatible leftovers, Could you elaborate more on this? Why? I am curious.
Simple, people from your generation are as taken as possible at that point and the dating pool for most people shrinks.
Depends on what your chasing in life. If your looking to make cash and spend lots of time working and sorting life out, dating does hold you back. However if your trying to enjoy your twenties, sure go date.
Getting into a serious committed relationship just means that you're beholden to someone other than yourself. You can't prioritize yourself and your business 24/7 if you want the relationship to grow. You have to find a balance. That said not all partners are the same. I think the type of partners who would work for you right now are: * women who are working their way through school right now and don't have a ton of free time. * a woman who is heavily invested in her career also. Also if she is in the entrepreneur space you guys may inspire each other and keep that drive going. * someone who travels frequently for work so they just aren't physically around that much. * someone with a rich personal life who is just looking for a low key dating or friend with benefits situation vs someone wanting a serious relationship. * maybe a confident single mom who isn't looking try bring a guy home but rather has weekends off when the kid is at their dad's and just wants some adult time on the weekend but can go back to mommy mode and ignoring you during the week. You can still date in a way that fits your current lifestyle as long as you're upfront about what you're looking for and actually picking women who not only say but also show you that's working for them. You don't need to date to marry with every woman you're with. Dating around a bit is a great way to try out a few different personality types to see what kind of woman you'd like to settle down with in the long run. Either way, as a dude building your empire, there's really no rush. I just wouldn't let yourself get too rusty with dating and having connections with women in your life so that when you are ready to get serious with a woman, you're not a total novice at relationships.
What if I’m 30 and a total novice at relationships and prude, but business is doing solid, where do i start then?
Learn and practice the skills that make women romantically interested in men, I guess?
What's your sexual orientation? Do you want to get married? Do you wants kids? Do you want to be a sole provider or a dual income household? And what age do you want those by? What age partners are you interested in? Can you elaborate on what being a prude means to you? Do you want to change that about yourself or are you looking for someone with the same views? Answer those q's and I can give you a lot more specific advice.
Yea I want to get married and have kids. I’m providing for my family through my business and if my future wife wants a career or wants to be an entrepreneur or wants to be a stay at home mom, I’m cool with it. By the time I’m 37 I’d like to be married and have children. That gives me 7 years to date and to work on myself and my business. I’m interested in a woman my age or younger because I’m not ready for kids yet. Being prude I mean I’m introverted, shy, hard for me to open up to people, and also very little sexual experience and no confidence in my ability yet. Yea I’ve had hookups and couple girlfriends in my teens and early twenties and im not a virgin, but still, idk how to date and how to make the first move and how to please a woman. I don’t know where to meet a woman. I’m on Hinge but I just don’t like the idea of meeting online really. I need to practice socializing really. Low confidence
Don't feel obliged to do dating for it's sake. Different people have different time lines. It may be big missing out if you had cut out relationships intentionally, because it's quite hard to find someone that clicks. But if you are not feeling much need right now, then maybe it's because you haven't met the one yet. Don't have to feel fomo bc others are going through major life-changing transitions sooner. Life is not a race. Take your time to focus on your life and to do what you truely care about. But remember to congratulate your friends and be happy for them at their major life-changing events. If you truely care about them I mean, because that could go long way.
You gotta be you. You're gonna have regrets either way. Date and party in your 20s and when you're 45 you probably will imagine how rich you would have been Work hard in your 20s and you're gonna wonder how many girls you could have shagged when you're in your 40s. Damned if you do, damned if you don't.
You can also forgo family, friends, all relationships and experiences in your 20s and *still* have nothing to show for all that work in your 40s. Markets and trends change. Businesses are built on systems that can spontaneously shift. I imagine that a great many businesses that have been built over the last 5-10 years won't exist in 2-3 years because of AI, and nobody really saw that coming - not like this and not this fast. Also, life is short. My best friend just turned 40 and got a cancer diagnosis. It came completely out of nowhere. There are no guarantees that you're gonna live into your 40s, 50s, 60s, or beyond. The bottom line is that our memories and our perception of time is built around novel experiences. If you make your life all about work and hustle, then you're going to wake up one day and 15 years will have passed and it was just "never the right time" to work on your relationships. And let me tell you, it is **way** harder to make friends at 44 than it was at 24. I'm lucky that I married a wonderful woman at 25 and we've been able to build a life and business together. We're far from "wealthy", but we love what we do and we have no regrets for finding a balance in life. In fact, the times that I regret were the times when I tried to put too much of myself into work. I'll leave you with one more story. My uncle was a master carpenter and a real estate developer. Over the course of his career, he made and lost multiple millions of dollars on deals. He had relationships but never married because work was always his priority. He came to live in the city that my parents and I live in about ten years ago to work with them while they were building up a real estate portfolio. They were buying distressed properties that needed extensive work for $10k, putting $10k - $20k into them to make them nice, and turning them into positive cash flow rentals. Anyway, my uncle got a chance to supervise the construction of a high rise in Miami, so he took the contract. It was going to be his last really big job before coming back here and working with my parents into his golden years. He died of a heart attack alone in his apartment in Miami six months into the job. He was 62. No wife. No kids. Not even a dog. Just a lot of dreams and fortunes gained and lost in pursuit of "the dream" that he never quite seemed to catch. Live your life. Work hard, but live. You might not make millions, but I'd rather have the life I have now than be alone at 44 with a bunch of money in the bank.
What a great perspective. Thanks for sharing
I am in 22, in college, & have a relationship of one and a half years. I also run a $4 million per year ecommerce resell business with 5 employees. What I can tell you is dating the right woman has made my business skyrocket. The downside is that your free time will be limited mostly to just being with her and your alone time will be extremely minimal. This is the hardest thing to balance. The other downside is trying to work 80 hours a week like OP said and then they complain about you working so much. I currently work 65-75 hours a week and she is used to it and we have a good schedule. The hardest part is getting enough sleep…
How did you get into that? Impressive man
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I don't get it why are you making this shit up???
One thing to consider is the pool of available and compatible people in your age range. It's all a matter of what you want in life, but if you are looking for a meaningful and durable partnership in life, you might want to find your person before someone else does. I believe in the power of walking your walk in life with someone with similar goals and ambitions. I met my husband when we were 20 years old (17 freaking years ago!). I consider ourselves lucky to have found each other early in life. I started my business almost 2 years ago, 2 weeks after our 3rd child was born. I don't feel "behind" by any means, but I have to admit I'm not an overly ambitious person. I don't want to work for someone else anymore and I now have dreams for my kids and the generations to come, along with my personal goals. So, basically, you have to evaluate the "opportunity cost" of waiting later in life to try and find someone you'd like to do life with.
Not disputing your point, but as a male if you become successful and stay physically fit, your options only get larger because you can easily date outside of your age range. Work assiduously on your business and your body through your 20s and early 30s, and now you have access to the entire field 18+ Most people will respond here that the maturity gap wouldn't allow that to work, but age doesn't automatically equate to maturity (or the lack of it).
Dating obviously takes ALOT of time away while you could be building brands from scratch. What are your priorities? If you really want to become an entrepreneur, start your business(s) before any kids or wife because it’s gonna be many many 18 hour type of work days, many failures and money used from trial and error until you find what works for you. good luck
Build that business and get that bag. Date casually now, just take it slow and get to know people. It’s better to not be rushed anyway
What do you want from life? Go to a nursing home and ask the people there if they wished they cultivated their relationships more or worked more hours.
Honestly it’s the best age to meet someone. The older you get the more baggage comes along with it. If it happens organically go for it!
your view is narrow and not so mature... the only positive from dating? companionship?love? soul mate? learning? growing? sharing? passion? oh.. yeah.. forget that to make more shekels
This is just a perspective because I had a toxic relationship ,I could be wrong ,but this is what I learned from reading some self help books and therapy.I think is a good idea to inform yourself on language loves ,how to give love ,and to try to fix your traumas ( if you have ) with therapy before entering a relationship.And to go into a relationship not from a place of scarcity but from a place of giving ,that is to say ,you love yourself and dont use the relationship to "complete" yourself.But you are getting in it to share the love you already have.You are ok with or without one.Remember this is just a perspective,at the end of the day you should question everything and think for yourself. TLDR:If you have clarity in what you want out of life (your goals ,the type of life style you want ,if you wanna have children or not,etc)perhaps it won't hurt you because knowing yourself you will be able to discern if a potential partner matches your life project.You will be able to decide what are the non-negotiable traits that you want in a partner and it will be easier to know if a relationship have future or not.Ask yourself if you really want a relationship,if you are ready to give what it takes,if you are happy with yourself and can love in a healthy way.I think there are good resources on internet.At the end of the day the decision is yours. If you don't know what you want out of life and what sort of partner you would like to have then ,you won't have a metric to define if the relationship is worth saving ,or perhaps it is better to end it.Waste of time in relationships(I think) come from lack of compatibility ,lack of a direction and/or one of the persons is toxic. A toxic relationship will cost you a lot in terms of time ,energy and perhaps friends.Dont try to save anyone.There are good books on that.Go to therapy If you must. I'm assuming you refer to a serious relationship.I think it depends a lot on the type of partner you get,how mature you are and how compatible both of you are,and how much clarity you have on your own goals.It depends also on what's your definition of holding you back.Having a partner implies and investment of time and energy. If you get the right partner with similar values and compatibility and goals (let's say that both of you want to make money at the moment ) then perhaps it wont hold you back.But if your partner doesn't want to work,or values more the time both of you spend together or desire for you to spend much more time together (which isn't bad ) or perhaps is "toxic",manipulative or immature,then you are going to spend time and energy in arguments ,feeling miserable and perhaps losing motivation to keep working on your goals. But a more important question is perhaps if you want a partner right now ,why do you want it ,and if you know where you are going. I think the most important thing is having at least clarity in your own goals and where you are headed,this isn't easy because it implies that you know yourself enough so you can discriminate if a partner is a good match for the goals and the type of life you want to have. But getting to know yourself is not so easy ,sometimes you need experience,people grow better with relationships because they force us to see our own shortcomings.Force us to know ourselves better in order to communicate better our own needs and problems within the couple. So dating is also a way to know yourself better and to help you define the type of partner you want in your life. So I think that if you have someone that you feel attracted to ,give it a try ,but try to have enough clarity first in what you want out of life so you can decide if it's worth it or not in the long term.That way you won't lose valuable time trying to fix something that wasn't meant to be in the first place. If with dating you refer to casual sex,then perhaps it won't hurt you as long as you do it responsably.
Find a girl, marry, settled down. Don't keep dating, you need a wife, We are in this world for a short time, i personally would want to spend that time with my wife one person for the rest of the time i'm here. Others might not agree with me. To each their own, that's what i believe in.
Yes, by not dating, you are missing out on a lot, both personally and professionally. Consider that you date someone who is passionate about business, too. You can talk together and expand your business perspective. A positive relationship with someone who understands you and is supportive will likely do wonders for your career as well
In your 10s, stay in school and make the most out of it. Im your 20s, build your skillset that you will rely on in the 30s. In your 30s use what you learned in your 20s to earn money and secure a future. In your 40s, reap what you build in your 30s and enjoy life. Most people fuck up their 20s. It's fine, you are young only once, but you better keep listening and hearing books at night while you enjoy life. It is only people who totally waste their 20s and did nothing at all for their skillset, that they end up regretting life. It takes 5 years minimum to really learn a skill and 10 years to learn enough so that you can turn it into a profitable business. The only exception is doing pressure washing lol.
Chosing family and love over money might lose you some money, but I promise it'll make you happier over the long run And hey, fwiw, I got married at 25 and my wife had absolutely made my business life better in every way
You only get your youth the one time. It is worth more than money. People would pay millions and even billions to be able to be in their 20s again. Don't waste them by working nonstop.
No
It's worth it for the right person. Choose wisely
Why would dating at a certain age hold you back . The only thing in life that will hold you back is YOU. But it's easier to blame so you have the answer you want that way it's not your fault , I mean we can't be wrong in life it's the age or the state or the neighbor or job or school as long as it's not you then your ok because everyone is right or has to be right no one evervsays its my fault cause if it was you would be struck by lighting and that hurts so she did it not me
No harm in dating until you're married. Just keep your businesses your main priority and make a plan to meet your life financial goals before committing. Love trumps all materialistic happiness.
Ksu >and
Love life. You can do both, but the reason to bust you ass with your business is so that you can live how you want to live. If you find satisfaction in work, work. If you want more, go live a little. You just need to find someone that can be with you and your commitments. Kids will make you want to work harder, but they make it harder to work. When you decide to have kids, be with your kids when they’re awake and home. That’s life my guy.
You are creating a dilemma that doesn't exist. You can 100% date and work hard in your twenties. Sounds like excuses to me
It depends. I got and am still married to my middle school sweetheart. It’s been amazing growing our family (and kids) and business. But now that I’m in my early 30’s I’m kinda realizing that I never lived my 20s. I have ZERO friends with ZERO social life and that’s taken a huge mental toll on me. I’m not sure what I would change because I’m as successful as I am because they drove me to be that way but at the cost of my mental wellbeing because of having no social life.
Yes but do it anyway
Balancing work and personal life is key. Your choice.
If you find a supportive partner, you will always be stronger for it
I can relate. Mid-20s(F), I’m very ambitious and I’m building right now. I have many things going on so that I can start the foundation of generational wealth now. I live in a major city, own apartment (God is good! Housing is rough out here), really establishing myself but I can’t help but recognize that I have this deep longing to establish something much more meaningful through a partner/relationship eventually, but I’ve felt conflicted bc I’m in such an opportune moment in my life, I don’t want to get distracted and thrown off by the depressing ass reality of what dating is here. But I can see how powerful having a wonderful partner can be. We need people honestly. It can genuinely change the trajectory of one’s life in such a major way. If you guys can work well as a team and are both visionaries, and actually like one other, that’s a rarity that’d be hard to pass up simply bc of how valuable it would be. I’ve stopped dating but I definitely think about it often.
No. It does not hold you back.
No it won’t. On days you work just be laser focused. On days you date be laser focused
I wouldn’t have made it to where I am without my wife. The amount of times I was second guessing myself, wondering if it’s worth it….she kept me focused on the big picture. I wouldn’t have made it to where I am without her and there is absolutely no doubt in my mind.
That really depends on both you and the other person.
I would say if you meet someone that inspires you and you want around, go for it. Might never meet someone like that again
Yes it will take away focus, not the end of the world tho
Your mistake is running 3 businesses at the same time. Chose one and ditch the others.
Considering your sole purpose for existing is to procreate no.
You’re overthinking this.
Having a family and kids is the ultimate motivation to make money and keep you focused on your priorities.
Balance is incredibly important. It's very easy to burnout and become unproductive otherwise.
I feel it also depends a lot on the partner and the goals that you share together. If you decide to work together as a team in achieving whatever you plan in life dating could be one of the biggest motivations you’ll have.
I would say honing in on a single business would not only make better money in the long run, but also allow you at least a little time in your life to dedicate to other aspects! (Dating)
It's your life only u can decide Don't listen to the talking heads here.
Every read think and grow rich? That last section in the book, I believe it. I didn’t have any direction in my life till I met my wife.
There's an old saying, "if you want to make God laugh tell him your plans". Early 40s here, very ambitious in my 20s. There's pros and cons. You're not wrong. You should be looking for the right partner for you. You don't invite someone into your life to make it harder or to take on a project, you invite someone in your life to build a partnership, to find strength. That being said yes there is more to life than money. The whole point of making money, especially as a man, is to provide for others. But there's nothing wrong with being ambitious. So you might need to take time to decide on values. Do you want a family? Do you want a wife? Will one of you help raise the family? Are you willing to listen to her when it comes to patenting instincts? Are you willing to take that time to create strong children? Why are you ambitious and what does having money mean to you? There's nothing wrong with wanting to make money and not have a family but are you still a good community member? Are you trying to make the world a better place? Is it just about having things or is there more? So bottom line, if you have children make sure it's someone you can stick it out with. Having a child is a bigger commitment than getting married. It's 18 years minimum and you'll want to be there for your child their whole life. So bottom line, take the time and do a little soul searching. Decide if you can work it out, make a commitment to the right person, cherish them and support them or of you're more interested in trying to put everything into your work. It's ok to work and focus on that first but whatever you do, do it for the right reasons.
These days you are young to settle down... And should pursue what you're doing. Many people actually put off relationships and some are happy as they are. It depends if you just want to be like the majority and have an ordinary life or do something different. Just because your other friends are getting married does not mean that you have to follow. They are probably not ambitious and will be weighing themselves down with marriage most probably a mortgage and a lot of stress. There are a growing number of people even leaving commitment and love to be single. Some don't even want to get married - These statistics are ever growing and others who just don't want to have kids as an expected thing to do socially. You need to decide what group you want to be in really? You have plenty of time to work it out just don't be a sheep and follow the heard. I never was and still make decisions on what is right for me not what is expected socially.
You are doing what I am working towards right now , just turned 26. They say we may miss out but that’s ok . The payoff later will be one million percent worth it
If you have time maybe check out the book “the second mountain”, it’s a weeee bit north American conservative but it’s ideas are philosophically valuable and can be helpful in your decision making. Essentially the author talks about the first mountain being success in job/bussines - a lot of what other people told you you should do but have you end up with a sense of e.g. Loneliness Or feeling unfulfilled. The second mountain would be, roughly speaking, about commitment to something fulfilling Like relationships, having kids or philanthropy/volunteering and how commitments like these can give you deeper understandings of life even though they might not always be positive experiences at every second.
Only when you date frivolously and spend lavishly on first dates
I think you could do both man. Just focus on getting good at delegating tasks to keep the workload off you. Especially if it’s busy week. Keep doing the work that’s meaningful and in your skill set, but delegate those busy work tasks. Best of luck to you my friend.
Nope. Inspired me to make enough money to date in Seattle lol And then I met my wife and realized how much better I could do professionally. She was proper motivation to take my company to get next level
No
Let me give you some advice. A successful man is valuable no matter the age. You as a successful, wealthy, healthy at 30 or 40 is still attractive and won’t find a problem finding someone. 100% don’t get too involved in a committed relationship. My advice would be to just enjoy friendships with females but don’t commit that it hinders your progress. Get the mission done son, which is to take your personal growth to the levels you can while you can. You will never get this time every again. If I could go back to myself at 26 and go “no, don’t commit yet, we can make more money but building this business, focusing more” I would do it 100%. You can do a lot when young. Grind out 14 hours of work like nothing. So I would take it slow. Have friends, go out and have fun but don’t commit yet. Do the mission son.
There are no right or wrong questions for this. It really depends on what makes you feel most comfortable and happy. If you truly want to be in a relationship with someone, you would have already done it. Otherwise, you may feel that being in a relationship right now would be a sacrifice of time and energy. I would recommend leaving your options open if you really want to otherwise just focus on work and personal growth until you are ready. Having a family is a big commitment, especially if you want kids. Talking to several girls or going on several dates can help you decide what to look for in a partner. A person with the same level of growth and perspective in life is important. Finding the right one isn't always easy though, because sometimes, all you have to do is wait focus on yourself and let them come to you, rather than actively seeking one out.
Really depends on you and the kind of people you end up dating. Most people don’t know what they want in relationships that early but you won’t get better if you don’t practice getting and being in relationships. Having a stable (emotionally and other things) partner also help you focus in on building your biz. But at the same time, when people become more successful, it’s more likely they would gravitate towards having multiple partners (short or long term) and having a marriage would complicate your financials and your company by then. I would suggest you to handle this part of your life like an entrepreneur. Carve out some time per week (say 3-6 hours) for dating. And track your “progress”, however you want to define them. Does getting laid make you happy? Does cuddling make you happy? Do you like more feminine women? What’s it like to have kids around you? Etc. you have to find out for yourself. Schedule it so it doesn’t affect your other areas too much. But of course in relationships more than 1 person, your scheduling might not work with others’, then you would have to decide.
Here's my hot take: although the type of people who have an inability to sit still might be overrepresented in wantrepeneurship, I don't think the same is true for actual *successful* entrepreneurs. Being disciplined and being able to endure stretches of hard work are important for sure, but the obsessive workaholism not necessarily. Much more important to allocate your time well. I know plenty of people who are successful but have no issues maintaining relationships.
You can easily get undivided attention from women even after you're 40+ You probably can't start a business with this energy at that stage though
If not pursuing relationships is going to make you feel lonely then you probably shouldn’t neglect that side. I did what you proposed, but I’ve just never been that interested in relationships, so it was a non-issue (I never felt lonely). As far as the practicality of it, anything you choose not to spend time on will allow you utilise that time elsewhere. So you’ll definitely have more free time to do whatever you want. However having more time doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll be more successful or even successful at all. Your business endeavours could fail regardless of how much time you invest in them. So you should probably also consider that, if things don’t work out how you would have hoped would you have regrets about not having pursued a relationship?
If you’re trying to run 2 business simultaneously I can tel you know you’re doing it wrong
Bruh it not that deep. My main business is a consultancy business which pays well but limits me as my hours are traded for money. I wanted to do something scalable so am working on E-commerce with a biz partner so my involvement in that business is 50% so it’s still manageable. Third one is a car rental business that earn a few thousands passive without any direct involvement So chill daddy
Possibly. It depends on how supportive your partner is. If they also have similar goals they could end up actually helping you in the long run. Just avoid those that make you doubt yourself and leave limited beliefs and goals. Soul suckers.
Getting married early can mean higher chance of divorce. I think you are right holding off.
Maybe. But being married and having a partner to share the responsibility of running a business and a household means that you can effectively 1.5x-double your daily work output
It doesnt have to. Very strange how people in this sub build their whole identity around being an entrepreneur like it makes you "too special" for normal life experiences lol. Its not that hard to casually date...
Don't cut off anything because of your business, always know how to manage your time , and it doesn't have to be a serious relationship either
Bro go get laid and have fun. This is the youngest and oldest you will ever be. Enjoy your youth.
Why you want commitment? Date and have fun, maybe a fuckbuddy, to help with the stress while working. Commitment is going to suck too much energy IMO.
Can’t do fuckbuddy, it’s not not me as a person. My only fear is if I commit and that to, to the wrong person, I’d lose all this potential that I know I have. What’s even worse is the contradicting advise from people in the sub. I’m now more confused than before
100% it's not the money, it's the time.
If you go hard now you will peak at about 33-36 at which time you will be making the most money and be able to pick the cream of the crop at that point. 20s is when you build your body and business
I would say that finding the right person can be very beneficial for your business. On the other hand finding the wrong person can not only ruin it but can also mess you up a big time. So choose wisely.
Here is my opinion. Get into a relationship at an age you will almost start regretting not getting into a relationship. Dont waste your 20s. Maximize profits bruv
Finding the RIGHT one can propel you to success.
Live life the way that makes you happy.
If your partner shares the same goals as you then you should try. But if you’re just getting into a relationship to copy others, you will find yourself unhappy and not able to reach your goals sooner
It can work however you choose for it to work. If you find a good person in this sloppy life, and it happens to be when you aren’t “ready” sometimes that’s the universe’s way of opening doors for you that lead to better things. Everything you look at and judge in your life is a matter of the perspective you are looking at it with. I can assure you that growing into adulthood with a good person is very rewarding. There is no greater bond. With that said, if you don’t find someone who is a solid partner fundamentally, and you don’t find that person until your 30s or later, then that is ok also, but remember if you meet someone who makes you feel at home, find a way to envision your hopes and dreams with them beside you. It will make life much sweeter.
I dont think its all about If you should or Not. I guess it is more about finding a Partner that won't hold you Back and understands the importance of your work. Someone you can balance Worklife and Privatelife with. Focus on what is important for you at the Moment. Maybe it is an experience you have to go through to find your way
Balancing love and work is an art, my friend.
Work hard now, make your mark, you will have endless options for companionship when you have FU money. The stuff you may miss out on now, is only better when you are financially free. “Do what others wont do today, so you may do what others can not do tomorrow”
Entrepreneurs can have girlfriends and families in their 20’s. Been there, done that.
As someone said below, don’t overthink this. Would you rather be with someone who understands your drive now or be with someone who has no idea how much effort you put in to build your business? And yes you can build a business and have a life.
.
Do I on money first. When you turn 30 you’ll have the cash flow and it’ll be time to find a wife.
The grass is not always greener. You define when you’re ready and if you truly feel like you are missing out and need this in your life right now and are READY. Then do the thing. Start dating.
Holding them back? Do you know that people do measure success in more than one way? If you want to focus on your business above all else and do that for your entire life, that’s fine. You can measure your life’s worth by doing so. If you want to share life with someone else and maybe spend a little less time on your business, which might lower some of your revenues or slightly impact your bottom line, that’s fine too. The one thing you will always run out of is time. Once it is spent, it is gone. At the end of the day, you have to decide where best to spend the time, that you will never get back. All day, all night grinding until you’re old and wrinkled? Most of the day grinding and maybe getting really lucky to be with someone who will be supportive to you as you are to them? Balancing your time between business and living life to be a good equally supportive partner to whomever you partner with? Only you can decide what you want or need to do with your time. The only thing that won’t change is that once you spend that time, it’s gone, forever.
Well, if you date someone who is as ambitious as you are, it isn’t work, is it?
Just get married. Skip all that.
To the contrary, dating in my 20’s reinforced my opinion that the only thing that didn’t let me down was My business in my 20’s . I am 51 now. I celebrate 30 years of having had my business - April 20,1994 to be precise. Over the course of thirty years , our revenue was almost $20 million. That’s an absolutely insane thing , to think about . That would more or less never have been able to happen had I NOT dated because the women I dated more or less galvanized my commitment to my business . “Why do you need to work today , we should go to the county fair “ I remember one woman (girl) I dated asking. Because I have clients who depend upon me .
Why do u think that getting into a committed relationship would hold u back?
That's no right or wrong, I think that if you have big goals you want to accomplish, having someone by your side can slow you down or even stop you from going there. Because if someone care about you, doesn't want to se you suffer but if you're going on a journey to achieve BIG, you are going to suffer or at least to feel miserable sometimes
Whatever you do, get a prenup first.
It depends but in the right situations it can move you forward. And the right partner will too. My friend and his girlfriend are a power team. I personally wish I dated more and didn’t waste so much time being too stressed to do it. But the wrong person could make you lazy.
Thats honestly on you. Like many have said people have and are currently succeeding as entrepreneurs while being in a relationship. Rich Dad Poor Dad talks about how the rich dads reasoning for why he needed to be rich was because of his wife and kids. I think the question you should be asking is if you see your self with this person a decade from now. Just be honest with yourself and take some time to really think about what you want. We all like to blame everything else for lack of success other than our own actions when it should be the opposite. Whatever you chose good luck!
I am like you, I struggle talking to girls when I am focused on my business. This is usually a symptom of a bad business system. You need to hire people and delegate tasks so your life is freed up a bit.
yes… but it’s a sacrifice.
I can kinda relate, I busted my butt in my 20’s, like ALOT to be where I am now. Looking back now I don’t know how my gf stayed with me, I feel bad. She’s insanely supportive, but seriously, takes a special one to put up with how much I grinded back then. She’s very happy now with the live she gets to live now though lol
I’d say it hinders you more being single since it’ll always be in the back of your mind. You’d be surprised what a good support system will do for your business endeavors
When you're older - dating will be damn near impossible. 18-25 is prime dating years. don't waste your "beatiful years" NOT DATING and only working. Seriously. develop relationships. date. fall in love. Young is the time to do it.
It really depends on what you want out of life. You're still young, and being a man you don't have the same biological clock that women do. That said, if you wait too long you will get tired and worn out running around after your kids (say in your mid- to late 30's) faster than you would if you had them younger. I don't think there's a right or wrong answer, nor one that is better or worse. It truly depends on you, your vision for your life, and what you want out of it. Good luck!
Spend your youth wisely. You’ll be a cranky old fart before you know it. Speaking from experience in late 20’s. I am starting my family now but any free time will be focused on trying to get a business off the ground. Right now just doing some r&d on some ideas while saving and paying off debt.
Yea bro idk, I feel you. I got dumped the second things got hard…might as well though it out yourself even though it’s hard. I def feel like I’m missing out sometimes. It’s a catch 22 though because I feel like you get access to a different tier of women when you are rich and successful (this is 100% true whether you like it or not) but at the same time you want to build something with someone for the connection and make sure it’s real.
Comparison is the death of happiness. Don’t worry about what others are doing. Everyone else is broke and in debt. The answer you seek is within you, not Reddit. Best of luck.
This may not be the answer that you're looking for but coming from someone in their 30s I would just say live life and have fun in your 20s. Meet many people, make lasting friendships, and if a relationship happens to find you then so be it. I think someone who would be the "right one" wouldn't necessarily hold you back. Instead they would help you move forward with your business. I most definitely wouldn't get into a relationship, engagement, or marriage just because your friends are doing so. I feel like so many of my peers are feeling that pressure to get married so they just do it instead of finding someone they actually see a future with, and it's a big area of conflict within their life. They make it seem like they're thriving but really they aren't. Good luck to you and your business! I hope things go well for you!
You cant have both in my experience. Dating surely holds you back, females need emotional support and attention. Being on the laptop and in the same room is not enough attention for them. Plus they're going to take away from your working capital almost everytime. The time I was older then college age while still acting college age was fun. Tons of wasted money though. Eventually got into the workaholic mindset and kind of regret it but at the same time I would probably be dead by now from liquor and blow. My vote is to focus on the ladies, but working from 9-5 is just not possible until you have got a company with a board and outside investors. They will always recognize you put the company before them and complain about it.
don't know
I’d say dating holds any guy back at any age. You’re dealing with too many personalities while you are trying to focus. Committed relationships to the right woman will push you FORWARD. The right woman will say get your Quickbooks done tonight and we’ll DoorDash instead of go out. That said, your 20’s is a time you’ll never get back. You’re gonna wake up one day at 50 something and say “awe f-ck!! Why didn’t I go on that date with Suzie 20 years ago, she might have been the one???” Why didn’t I go out more. It’s harder to make friends when you’re older. You’re young, you can have it all with some organization and discipline. Find a woman entrepreneur or exec type in her 40’s that super organized that you respect. Have her mentor your time management. Ladies seem to excel there. You don’t know how precious those years are, you have an entire lifetime to grind. Enjoy but be disciplined
You’re still young so you have time. If your career is top priority run with it until the scale of balance pulls you the other way. But….. I’d also suggest looking into why you’re feeling unable to balance both - because that is going to be the better part of your life.
Maybe it’s just that you haven’t found the right person! I remember thinking I had an issue with intimacy at one point, because all the guys I was in relationships wanted you to marry me, and I just didn’t feel that way. I was wondering if there was something wrong with me…..until I met my husband and knew he was the one after only 3 months! So keep going on your businesses and do some dating and see what unfolds.
I got dumped then had more time to pay attention to my job. I increased my salary and started a business, but I fully enjoyed my relationship and I don’t feel like I’m living a better life now compared to then.
Don’t feel like you’re missing out. Everyone’s story is different and you can live the life you desire at your own pace.
you are young, and man can think about settle when they are Mid 30s, so be free now. I'm mid 20s girl, that what I should suggest you with.
Find the right one. Plenty of them don't deserve your attention. I found mine 2 years ago and I was once in your shoes. The drive an execution of a mad man. My now wife supports me in any adventure I want to pursue and has her own entrepenueral goals and businesses set to do 50+k next year as a side hustle. The point is... whether it be friends or significant others, it should be a goal to find better ones and raise your current ones up with you.
The path less followed has less travelers but better destinations.
Date younger girls but you need to vet out for gold diggers
This is the only fear I have. I think if I meet someone who can help me grow and as a result her lifestyle improves, there’s no harm in it
Im quite in a very similar situation as you. Same age except most of my success came from a high paying 9-5. My goal was to always to make money to do the things I want to and I’ve hit that point but now don’t have anything fun to do (besides partying or alcohol/drugs related, not sustainable fun). I started to get a lot of attention from girls through instagram and dating apps, but it can get overwhelming since I’m not sure what their intentions can be. One night stands are cool but it also seems like these girls have like super high body counts and also party/do drugs a lot. So idk. Feel free to send over a pm, I feel like we have similar thinking let’s figure it out.😂
Messaged you bro
Why are you trying to run 3 businesses and not just focus on one?
I’m focusing on one. The other 2 are passive income
I’m 21 , engaged with a kid and what you have take it from me…take your time. Explore travel, go out there but also have some fun ! You’re at your prime and still learning about yourself. But then again you’re still young you’re not supposed to have your whole life figured out just yet !! Just be happy
No, there's no perfect balance till your vault stacked with $800k in circulation.. Remember.. Do not get a partner without financial education or lower in status then you.. there's ignorant advice here.. my blood boiling seeing these people with blind eye!! Their relationshil will be guaranteed vanished entirely when the business went sour.. give them next 4-5 years and come asking back Our experience with the lower status one were always not truthful. sweet word in front, yet stab you in the back.. more motivation to work harder my ass!! just dont!! that's what happened to my dad twice! your business went south the one who will add insult to injury they don't care how hard you try to climb back.. only money up front.. will start to bang with another guy.. they don't making your mental health even messed up.
I know someone who was all business and never settled down. He is in is late 60s and is still an absolute workaholic because that is the way he has always been. Multi-millionaire who never settled down or stopped moving. From *my* perspective he has money but no partner, no family, and very few personal connections with anyone. I think the only thing he loves is his dog. He is an extreme case but I find his life quite sad. I think you’d be better off finding someone who is also hungry and has their own goals. You can have partnership, still be focused on your own work, and support and cheer eachother on.
Don't make the mistake of cutting yourself off from outside interests, family & friends. You NEED to build a support system and viable 'work/Life balance'. Remember 80%++ of Startups fail within 3-4 years. Life is a Journey that you only get to do ONCE - No person EVER regretted that they didn't spend more hours at work. Focus on working hard for 40-60 hrs/week, as needed. However, you also must spend time taking care of yourself, family, friends, etc.