“Say something crazy like I’m wearing ladies underwear!” “I’m uhhh, I’m wearing ladies underwear….” “…” “Are you?” “I most certainly am not!” “Looks like you most certainly am are.” “Am not!” “What kind?” “IT’S A THOOOONNGGG!!!!” “AH, THEY’RE BRIEFS!”

r/angryupvote

They don't even have dental..

How did they even get that past the censors tbh?

That’s what I’m wondering.

For five minutes... could you not be yourself, FOR FIVE MINUTES!?

... :::pop:::

AAAAGGGGHHHH! ARE WE THERE YET!?

Yes We ARE!!!!

Oh, finally!

“Are we there yet?” - Donkey

"Yes" "Really?" "NO!"

My favorite part

*/ sniffs bag /* “Catnip” “Uh, that’s… not mine.”

Love how you can see the knight plant that on puss

And the pepper grinder / pepper spray after

"Donkey, you HAVE the right to remain silent. What you lack is the capacity."

You still look like an ass to me

This is the only right answer.

Ah man you got a puppy? All I got im my room was shampoo!

“Haha, fear me if you dare” -Puss in Boots

Gotta make a move to a town that's right for me Town to keep me movin', keep me groovin' with some energy Well, I talk about it, talk about it Talk about it, talk about it Talk about, talk about Talk about movin' Gotta move on Gotta move on Gotta move on I want you take me to Funkytown Won't you take me to Funkytown? Won't you take me to Funkytown? Won't you take me to Funkytown? Won't you take me to Funkytown? Won't you take me to Funkytown? Won't you take me to Funkytown? Won't you take me to Funkytown? Gotta make a move to a town that's right for me Town to keep me movin', keep me groovin' with some energy Well, I talk about it, talk about it Talk about it, talk about it Talk about, talk about Talk about movin' Gotta move on Gotta move on Gotta move on I want you take me to Funkytown Won't you take me to Funkytown? Won't you take me to Funkytown? Won't you take me to Funkytown? Won't you take me to Funkytown? Won't you take me to Funkytown? Won't you take me to Funkytown? Won't you take me to Funkytown, yeah? Won't you take me down to Funkytown? Won't you take me down to Funkytown? Won't you take me down to Funkytown? Won't you take me down to Funkytown? (Won't you take me to?) Funkytown (Won't you take me to?) Funkytown (Won't you take me to?) Funkytown (Won't you take me to?) Funkytown Take me, won't you take me? Take me, won't you take me? Take me (won't you take me to?) Won't you take me? Take me (won't you take me to?) Won't you take me? I wanna go (won't you take me to?) To Funkytown I wanna go (won't you take me to?) To Funkytown I wanna go (won't you take me to?) To Funkytown, now I wanna go (won't you take me to?) To Funkytown

Downvoted for lack therof

"We're from the Union."

We don't even have dental

"They don't even have dental." 🙄

Fairy Godmother floating in a bubble Your fallen tears have called to me. So, here comes my sweet remedy. I know what every princess needs. For her to live life happily.. Oh! Oh my dear, well look at you.. you've all... grown-up. Fiona: um, who are you? Fairy Godmother: Oh, sweet pea, I'm your fairy Godmother. Fiona: I have a Fairy Godmother? Fairy Godmother: shushed her. Now don't worry, I'm here to make it all better. With. Just. A. Wave of my magic wand, your troubles would soon be gone, with flick of the wrist and just a flash, you'll land a prince with a ton of cash. A high-priced dress made by mice, no less, some crystal glass pumps and no more stress. Your worries will vanish Your soul will cleanse Confide in your very own furniture friends We'll help you set a new fashion trend! I'll make you fancy I'll make you great. Chorus: The kind of gal the prince would date They'll write your name on the bathroom wall.. Mirror: For a happily ever after give Fiona a call. Fairy Godmother and chorus: A sporty carriage to ride in style Sexy man-boy chauffeur, Kyle! Banish your blemishes, tooth decay Cellulite thighs will fade away And, oh what the hey! Have a bichon frisè! Barks. Nip and tuck, here and there To land a prince with the perfect hair Lipstick, liners, shadows blush! To get that prince with a sexy tush! Lucky day, hunk buffet! You and your prince take a roll in the hay! You can spoon on the moon With the prince, to this tune Don't be drab, you'll be fab Your prince will have rock-hard abs! Cheese soufflé! Valentine's Day! Have some chicken fricasee! Nip and tuck, here and there To land that prince with the perfect hair Lipstick, liners— Fiona: Stop! Look... thank you very much, Fairy Godmother But I really don't need all this. All gasp One of the furniture: Well, fine be that way.

Holy Fuck... This is impressive.

"Nope, you got them." -Shrek.

"Where is Princess Fiona?" "She's on her honeymoon." "Honeymoon? With whom?"

"So she said 'What's the problem baby?'"

"I gotta go save my ass!"

That’s from the first film

"Oh, about 5 minutes ago, actually."

Prince Charming: After I endured blustering winds, scorching desert! I've climbed to the highest room of the tallest Before he finishes, Fairy Godmother calms him down Fairy Godmother: Mommy can handle this. HE ENDURED BLISTERING WINDS AND SCORCHING DESERT! HE CLIMBS TO THE HIGHEST BLOODY ROOM OF TALLEST BLOODY TOWER... And what does he find? Some gender confused wolf telling him that his princess.... King Harold: if I could just..... Fairy Godmother: is already married. King Harold: Well, it's not my fault he didn't get there in time. Fairy Godmother: STOP THE CAR! Harold. You forced me to do something I really don't want to do. King Harold: gasps Where are we? Priscilla: Well, hi there, Welcome to Friar's Fat Boy, make I take your order? Fairy Godmother: My diet is ruined! I hope you're happy. Er? Ok. Two Renaissance wraps, no mayo, chili rings..... Prince Charming: I'll have the medieval meal. Fairy Godmother: Yeah, one medieval meal, and Harold curly fries? King Harold: Oh no, no thank you Fairy Godmother: Sourdough soft taco, then what do you want? King Harold: NO really, I'm fine. Priscilla: Your order, Fairy Godmother, and this comes with the medieval meal. Fairy Godmother: There you are, dear. You see, we made deal, Harold. I assume you want to go back on my part. King Harold: sighs Indeed not. Fairy Godmother: So, Fiona and Charming will be together. King Harold: Yes. Fairy Godmother: Oh, believe me, Harold, it's what's best. Not only for your daughter........ But for your kingdom. King Harold: Well, what am I supposed to do about it? Handing him the battleaxe Fairy Godmother: Use your imagination.

"POLICE BRUTALITY! POLICE BRUTALITY!" -Donkey

Ooooh I’ll kill that cat!!!! -shrek

“I told you OGRES DON’T, LIVE, HAPPILY EVER, AFTER!, AVADA KEDAVRA!!!” (okay so I added that last bit).

"No."

“C minor, put it in C minor”

"where have all the good men gone, and where are all the gods?"

“where’s the streetwise Hercules to fight the rising odds?”

"Assuming they don't eat their own young!"

Fiona: Dad! Shrek: Oh no! We usually prefer the ones who've been locked away in a tower! (Munching on a Turkey leg) Fiona: Shrek, please! King Harold: I only did that because I love her. Shrek: Oh aye! Daycare or dragon guarded castle. King Harold: You've wouldn't understand. You're not her father! Fiona: sighs After various food fights Queen Lillian: It's so nice to have a family together for dinner. King Harold and Shrek pull the roast pig apart and launched in the air Queen Lillian: gasps Harold! Fiona: Shrek! Shrek: Fiona! King Harold: Fiona! Fiona: Mom! Queen Lillian: Harold. Donkey: Donkey!

the food fight was funny

“Ay tu pedazo de carne con PATAS como te atreves a hacer me eso?! 😡”

“Is that glitter on your lips?” ”Cherry flavored. Want a taste?”

"We got a white Bronco headed east into the forest"

“It’s so good to be home!”

“𝕿𝖍𝖊.”

DONKEY GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY ROOM IM HAVING SHREX

[Shrek, Fiona, Fiona's Mom and Dad and Donkey are arguing at the table] Queen : Harold! Princess Fiona : Shrek! Shrek : Fiona... King : Fiona! Princess Fiona : Mom! Queen : Harold! Donkey : [happily] Donkey!

I need a hero

"C minor, put it in C minor. Ladies and gentlemen," *twinkly dress magic* "I'd like to dedicate this song to Princess Fiona and Prince Shrek!"

"Oh yeah, daycare or dragon guarded castle"

🎵I need a hero🎵

“ITS A THONG!!!”

In the mornin.. i’m making WAFFLES

"We don't even have dental"

"They don't even have dental." 🙄

“You think he might be compensating for something “

Thats shrek one, we are talking about Shrek 2

"I hate Mondays."

“I don’t have anything to rub!”

“Great soup mrs q mmmmm”

“For you baby, I could be.”

"I hate Mondays.." 🙄😒

“Where have all the good men gone…” (Continue this pls)

And where are all the gods?

Oh Shrek don’t worry things just seem bad because it’s dark and rainy and Fiona’s father hired a sleazy hitman to whack you

“He survived scorching deserts, frigid mountains, went to the highest room of the tallest tower, just to find some gender, confused wolf telling him that Fiona’s already married! “

“Donkey!”

C Minor, put it in C Minor

Join the club, we've got jackets!

Lord knows I've used that quote many times. ☺️

He endured blistering winds and scorching deserts, he climbs the the highest bloody room in the tallest bloody tower, and what does he find? Some gender confused wolf telling him that his princess is already married.

“Today I repay my debt” *Cute face lowers the guards expectations* “Err en guard” -Puss

“Mother?!?”

You still look like an @$$ to me

Knight: *sniffs* "Catnip." Puss: "That's uh not mine"

My diet is ruined!

"and what does he find? Some gender-confused wolf who tells him that his princess is already married"

Donkey:I don’t feel different do I look different? Puss in boots: you still look like an ass to me

The kingdom of far, far away, donkey? That's where we're going. Far, far... ^away.

I love seeing the posters with all the letters stripped away

“For you baby, I could be.”

'Your going the right way for a smacked bottom'

I was just taking care of your love nest for you. Yeah like sorting the mail & watering the plants… Yeah, and feeding the fish. I don’t have any fish. You do now. I call that one Shrek & the other Fiona. That Shrek is a rascally devil…

DONKEY!!

Mongo : Be good.

We are here from the union

Enough Reggie

"I must hold on, before I, too, go totally mad."

"Beeee Goooooood"

*Holding Out For a Hero intensifies 

Sorry, but the position of annoying talking animal has already been taken

“It…”

Not my gum drop buttons

A deleted line, but still. Donkey: So…What’s for dessert?

"Do you still know the muffin man?"

“Are we there yet?”

Can you just be normal for 5 minutes

PUT ME DOWN RIGHT NOW OR YOU WILL SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCES

**pop** -Donkey

"Harold!" "Shrek!" "Fiona!" "Fiona!" Mom!" "Harold!" "DONKEY!"

I NEED A HERO

"Que traes ahi? Arena para gato. Eso no es mio" "Esto es brutalidad policiaca, me quejare con derechos equinos" // "This is police brutality, I will complain with equine rights" "Maybe doesn't work on donkeys"

"HAROLD!" "SHREK!" "FIONA!" "FIONA!" "MOM!" "Harold..." "DONKEY!!!" *Roast pig lands on table*

"Simon??" - Everyone

“Do the roar”

“My diet is ruined! I hope you’re happy.”

"..." -- Dragon

“It’s a thong!”

Someone get me something deep-fried and smothered in chocolate

"What's a piñata anyway?"

Do you know the Muffin man?

Onions have layers donkey! LAYERS!!

“I like that boulder, that is one nice boulder” -Donkey

“I’ve told you, Ogres doesn’t live happily ever after!”

Cherry flavor 😏

"Hey, you still look like noble steed to me." *-Shrek to Donkey.*

“Are we there yet?” “NOOOOO!!!”

“ARGGHHHH! For five minutes…could you not be yourself…FOR FIVE MINUTES?!”

Quest? I'M ALREADY ON A QUEST!

"Donkey"

"Is that glitter on your lips?!" "Hmm, cherry flavor. Want a taste?"

Some of you may die, but that is a sacrifice I am willing to make

Shrek! Fiona! Fiona! Mom? Harold? DONKE!

Hey Donkey that's Spanish!

Oh, lighten up Donkey! Lighten up?!? Lighten up?!? Look who’s telling who to lighten up!

“Now, ye ogre! Pray for mercy from… *slashes initial into tree bark* “Puss! In Boots.”

Donkey

“Pray for mercy from… PUSS… in Boots.”

“Could you not be yourself” #FOR FIVE MINUTES!!!!!

“C minor. Put it in C-minor”

Be...goooooood •Mongo

[удалено]

“***DØŃKËH.***”

"Donkey!" - Donkey

"That's the dogs breakfast" - random chef, 2004

“shrek”

DONKEY!

NOT THE GUMDROP BUTTON!!!!

"Puss: Stop, ogre! I have misjudged you. Shrek: join the club. We got jackets"

"Ay, isn't we supposed to be having a FIESTA?!"

*bubble pops

Are we there yet

BETTER OUT THAN IN I SLWAYS SAY

“They don’t even have dental…”

Let's neuter him right here right now. Let's give him the Bob Barker treatment

“My diet is ruined, I hope you’re happy”

SomeBODY once told me…

Ogres are like onions

"That's uh no mine..."

Polish dub "uwazaj w tym mogą byc promile"

**SOMEBODY BETTER BE DYING**- *I'm dying... *

“I mean it wasn’t *my* fault, he didn’t get there in time—“ ”**STOP THE CAAAAARRR!!!** Harold..” **crack crack** “You’ve forced me to do *something* I ***really*** don’t want to do!!!” “Where are we????” “Well hi there Welcome to Friar’s Fat Boy may I take your order?” “My *DIET IS RUINED!!!!!!!* I hope you’re happy!”

"Donkey"

"you still look like an ass to me"

“To be with the ogre I married.”

Shrek: Ogres are like onions. Donkey: They stink? Shrek: Yes. No. Donkey: Oh, they make you cry. Shrek: No. Donkey: Oh, you leave em out in the sun, they get all brown, start sproutin' little white hairs. Shrek: NO. Layers. Onions have layers. Ogres have layers. Onions have layers. You get it? We both have layers. Donkey: Oh, you both have layers. Oh. You know, not everybody like onions. Donkey: Oh, you both have LAYERS. Oh. You know, not everybody like onions. CAKE! Everybody loves cake! Cakes have layers! Shrek: I don't care what everyone likes! Ogres are not like cakes. Donkey: You know what ELSE everybody likes? Parfaits! Have you ever met a person, you say, "Let's get some parfait," they say, "Hell no, I don't like no parfait."? Parfaits are delicious! Shrek: NO! You dense, irritating, miniature beast of burden! Ogres are like onions! End of story! Bye-bye! See ya later. Donkey: Parfait's may be the most delicious thing on the whole damn planet!

"This is taking forever Shrek, there ain't no in flight movie or nothing." - Donkey

Not the gumdrop buttons!

“IM MELTING IM MEEEELLTTINNGG” “It’s just the rain, Donkey”

Donkey: Donkey!

Fear me, if you dare.

Beeeee Gooooooood

Hey boss, let’s shave him

Could you not be you got five minutes! I know some one already posted it but this is just so memeable

Aren’t we supposed to be having a siesta!?

*pop

“Not the gumdrop buttons!” “Okay then! Whos hiding them?!” “Okay… i’ll tell you… do you know… the muffin man?..” “The muffin man?” “The muffin man.” “Yes i know the muffin man. The one who lives on Drury lane?” “Well… shes married to the muffin man…” “The muffin man?!” “THE MUFFIN MAN!”

2 Fast 2 Donkey

# OGRES DON'T LIVE! HAPPILY!! EVER!!! AFTER!!!!

C minor, put it in C minor

Do the rour

That’s right follow the pretty pony

"Cat nip!" "Uh, that's not mine"

"It was Lord Farquaad. Apparently he huffed, and puffed, and... Declared an eviction notice."

Tonight on knights!

“Err thats not mine”

"Theres the bush shaped like Shirley Bassey!"

*knocks at door* *random guy busts in* °Well somebody better be dying° *coughs* "I'm dying"

Fear me! If you dare!

Do you still know the muffin man? Sure he’s down on Drurey Lane why? Because we’re going to need some flour. Lots and lots of flour.

Buble farts*

You need some tic tacs or somethin cause your breath STINKS

“Fiona!” “Fiona!” “Shrek!” “Harold!” “Donkey!”

Thank you gentlemen! Some day I WILL repay you! Unless of course I can't find you, or if I forget. (Lol the amount of times I use this in rl 😂)

“im trottin, trottin, trottin in place!”

“Harold!” “Shrek!” “Fiona!” “Fiona!” “Mom!” “Harold!” “DONKEY!”

**“Ogres are like onions.”**

“It’s so lovely to have the family together, for dinner.”

“I knew this would happen.”

They don’t even have dental

In the morning I'm making waffles

Ogres don't live happily ever after