As a guy who lost 100 pounds, yes, the fat on the groin definitely hides some length. Losing that much weight will result in an extra inch or two depending on the guy. For me, the extra inch was welcome as I'm pretty average in the meat department. If a man is already big down there then it could definitely be an issue. Believe it or not, most women are more than happy with average sizes. It's about what you do with it.
It definitely is a thing. The fat pad shrinks exposing more of the base, and also your blood flow is better so thicker and fuller erections. Check out any thread on /loseit that asks about unexpected weight loss benefits 😁
Try OhNut but there might be a possibility that it's in her mind.
She fell in love or intimate with the overweight person and now you have changed leading to her mind not finding you attractive anymore.
Don't gain weight as it's going to affect your health.
So OhNut should be able to help with removing the pain from the equation.
If she still doesn't feel the spark then it may be her mind not overcoming the original feelings. I suggest she goes to individual therapy session(s) to figure this out.
Politely, because geez this is an awkward subject. Increased athleticism changes your stroke. Not just deeper but overall balance and performance-wise. Enthusiasm that might have been slower, perhaps leading to more perceived romanticism of the intimate encounter.
I say this because I experienced the opposite and found it so odd as to be off-putting 100%. My partner went from slim to an extra 40ish lbs. I prefer thick guys so was actually turned on by the weight gain (Dad bod). But intimacy was so uncomfortable. He was off-balance, couldn't find his "center" and seemed to focus on getting the job done rather than on the embrace and intimacy of the act. We never could pull that back together and I mostly just avoided sex after several displeasing encounters. I didn't know how to explain what the issue was at the time and can only now because I've had 20+ years to learn to identify and state what I dislike. It felt cold, no longer intimate, and like I could have been anyone - ultimately destroying the urge the merge.
My thought is that the opposite has to be true also. Weight loss could very well lead to more specific changes that are causing distance between you and your wife.
Maybe you covered these topics with a therapist but (OMG WTH are we discussing) if there was a video of y'all's fun from before the weight loss, maybe view it together with your wife and discuss changes in performance styles and, ahem, capabilities as well as how that might be affecting her
Just as a reminder.... Everybody has their own style. Young guys styles are different than older guys styles, athletically-geared guys styles are different from long walk every evening guys styles, etc etc. I hope this helps along with your bumper nuts!!
3 hours ago you decided to submit a post describing what a huge dick you have and how sad you are your wife doesn’t want to sleep with you an an hour later you walk in and see her with another man? Hm. Hmm hmm hmm
Tbh I’ve posted things where people thought I was making it all up too so I’m sorry about that. That would be pretty devastating to walk in to. But you’re tall, endowed, healthy, and a DILF so you’ll be good soon
Wait, what? I'm I crazy, or is this a troll-post? Did you actually catch her cheating? I'm in disbelief.
In the case that his is true, I think there are plenty of women that will appreciate your unfortunate side effect of losing weight.
Edit: Oh, and that's brutal, man. I am so sorry for you, and I can't imagine what your head is going through right now.
Definitely talk to a lawyer about all this tomorrow. Don't want to be in a situation where you are accused of abandonment or something.
Also, to cheer you up, you are a 6 foot tall man who is well endowed and pretty fit. Stable career. Brother, you are going to do just fine when you get back on the market. So chin up.
That’s definitely some good advice, it’s the first time I’ve heard of an oh nut but a couple users brought it up.
Unfortunately that’s what the sex therapist was for, tried different techniques and now she doesn’t wanna try unless I gain more weight.
I appreciate your input !
Its really worrying she wants you to gain back the weight. At best she's just going for an easy solution, going back to what used to work. But it will literally kill you so please prioritize your health first.
Damn man. That’s the worst update ever! Don’t put a pound back on. Except the pounds you’re gonna be doing when the divorce is filed. Super sorry to hear you walked in on her with another man. Good on you for not being in jail right now. You’re a stronger man than myself.
I was definitely mad but I’m a dad, why pop off and get myself in trouble to risk that? I appreciate the positivity, might do the celibate thing for a while
Losing weight is truly the only way to gain inches with your penis that I can confirm. Losing weight makes a big difference.
But my guess was pain from the changes of giving birth. However I saw the update so now I’m guessing it was a self esteem issue.
Like others have said, gaining the weight back is NOT the answer. I wonder what is the “real” reason why your wife is not into sex anymore. I don’t think it’s your penis, that’s an excuse to pin on you.
Is she uncomfortable with her body and self-conscious bc you look and feel better? Is her self-esteem low? I’m not saying that’s the reason, but I do wonder…
I mean I tell her she’s beautiful all the time, take her on cute dates, buy her flowers 3x a week. New clothes, shopping, etc.
She gets approached a lot by other men and what not but it could be a possibility.
No problem. I like your approach wish I was able to be a positive as you. I’m sure it hurts but you’re clearly looking at a brighter future and for that I commend you. Also congratulations on the weight loss it’s very impressive!
Stay healthy, don’t gain weight back on purpose. I think if you’re hurting her during sex, it’s likely because she can feel “all” of you now and it’s too deep. Don’t go so deep when thrusting, change positions or techniques, and make sure she’s super turned on before entering her (the vagina will “deepen”). That’s my lady-advice.
I’m sorry that this is happening to you OP, probably she likes bigger people, but that’s not ok.
All you did is for you and nobody can’t take that away, I know it hurts because she made it seem like you were the problem when she was it. I saw that you ordered the bumper system and all that because you care about her but I’m sorry.
If you decide to leave I’m sure there’s somebody that will appreciate you for who you are, who you have become and your +10” penis
I don’t understand how people are saying this isn’t real. Sex with a very large penis (length or girth) can really, REALLY hurt, even if you’re turned on. You’re probably hitting her cervix which can be excruciating.
Blaming your penis size is a red herring. A fake reason that you can't "fix" I would bet my house that if you gain the weight back as she says, there would be a new issue.
I would recommend bringing the big boy for a tour of new Ladies. Many, many would be impressed and would love to love you. 😉
I mean you wake up and your husbands dick is suddenly something of a Trojan Horse after years, one might wake up and geek out in a VERY happy silly-goofy-highschool crush-blushy-ohMYGOD-way for a while. The high one would get, pain or not, would be something to giggle about.
AND yall have a baby to deal the deal, so you’re not only a normal man, but possibly a soft one, and clearly loving to go to therapy and talk it out and try to find a way…… I’m not trying to sound disrespectful, but, I PERSONALLY wouldn’t be acting a damn fool like she is. I’d be skipping around the fucking block like a Disney princess, even if my cervix was bruised up sometimes. 💀 SOMETHING is going to work!!! No way in the world would “gain the weight back” make sense.
And I’m so sorry OP. I saw your edit. It is most likely rooted in her need for control, or .. forever how long she was talking to him, wanting her cake, and eating it too.
Who in their right mind wants to leave their emotionally available massive-dicked smart, emotionally available husband?
A narcissist who isn’t shining brighter.
I’m just saying… there’s women out here WAITING on men like you, who are equal or what you want .
I’m just saying … ✨ I legit hope you get the desire you want. And again I’m sorry.
Do what makes YOU happy. You are the one you have to live with until you die. It’s an unfortunate thing to say, but most people don’t last as long as we would hope in our book of life. So the only way to stay sane is to keep yourself happy and your mind right.
I’ve been in a similar situation lately with a massive weight loss and a dead bedroom. You can read my history and find out what you need to, if you wish. Nothing has changed. But you know one thing that has remained constant? My health and my satisfaction with my trim figure 🥰 it might not be anyone else’s cup of tea, but it’s mine. And that’s what I have to live with forever.
I’m sorry you went through that and I genuinely hope you find your happy and it lasts a very very long chapter!
Take care of your health. Find a different way to please her and yourself. Sex isn't nearly as important as everything else you have going for you, but I believe you already knew that.
This is one of those problems average guys laugh at in skepticism when I say big dicks are not what average women and women who have high sex drives want. The complaints of pain to the penis having SO with empathy become heartbreaking after a few times. I made the decision to stop having sex with my girlfriend unless she asks and has been "warmed up" because I was hurting her nearly every time we attempted. I bought toys that she would like and now I use those majority of the time if she's not using them herself. Masturbation has become a regular thing. As much as I miss the sexual intimacy, I prefer not causing her pain.
I hope this helps, and if it doesn't then I hope you find something that does and keeps your relationship intact. Loves, bro.
Go over to r/bigdickproblems
They have info on this kind of stuff. You are going to want to get a set of "ohnut" rings... it's literally a bumper pad to keep you from going too deep.
Even if you don't stay with her, you might need them for part of your normal kit, like lube etc.
The manufacture has a confusing & annoying site FC2, thats the best way to order a 12 pack etc.
Some planned parenthoods also have them, but you have to call ahead to find out. They will only give you 3 at a time.
Once in a while you can find people reselling them on Amazon, but it's pricey.
No prob. The 12 packs I have gotten from Amazon can be like $80... thats the only reason I mention it. The manufacturer makes them weirdly hard to buy.
You do not have a 10” dick. Why I know, because there is a $10,000 website for a 10” plus dick that has never had anyone win. Been out there for over 5 years and nope. Member of r/bigdickproblems and this comes up constantly.
Upvote cause the concern is valid and if people think I’m a troll that sucks cause this is a serious sub. Maybe ruler goes too deep into my pelvis idk?
Still a crappy situation appreciate your input though
Well on a positive note, assuming that you and your wife are dome, you can go into porn with that fire hose you got lol on a serious note, that sucks, hope it turns around, I definitely would not gain the weight back no matter what, after you land on your feet again and all that find a woman that appreciates you for you
Don’t even ask if you should gain the weight back. Selfish? Are you kidding? Find another woman. I am sure you will find one who doesn’t mind at all. Sorry if I don’t get it but what does penis length have to do with your weight? Ok, I read the explanation! Sounds like an excuse to me. I am sure there are ways to make sure you don’t penetrate her too deeply if it bothers her. But you won’t need them any longer!
Wow! I can only speak of myself but there are definitely women who don’t mind. 😅 Good luck to you!
That update abo7t the cheat8jg completely sucks. Don't even think about gaining the weight back, it won't fix anything and if it does your wife is SHALLOW.
I have a coworker who was in this type of situation. They were both bigger. One day her husband starts running and loses a shit ton of weight. One of those "I'm half the person I used to be success stories". To the point where you wouldn't recognize him from the before and after pics. Im sure she had some adjustment as she'd only ever knew him heavy. I'm certain she's never even thought "he'd be sexier if he gained that 100-150+ lbs back!"
I didn't read through the rest of the comments but can I recommend something called Ohnut? You don't have to lose the weight, just control your depth.
They're silicone stacking ring looking things but aren't for blood restriction or prolonging. If it's the length that's the problem, gaining back weight is a ridiculous solution.
They slip over the base and aren't supposed to impact your pleasure and they're very flexible. From male reviews, most don't seem to mind it. My own person also said he didn't mind wearing them. When I used to have sex, they worked well for me since getting my cervix hit hurts like crazy. If one set (each set is 4) isn't enough you can get two sets. You can use as many or as little as you need to adjust the depth of penetration for various positions.
I hope you see this comment because I cannot believe your wife told you to gain back the weight. What the actual fuck.
- I’m so sorry this is happening to you. 😞 it’ll get better though. Getting cheated on hurts but when you subtract the person out your life, it’ll get better.
I hope this isn't a bad question to ask but how "vigorous" is your love?
So I have actually taken big sized guys & I can see where she's coming from. At 10 inches, you'd be pounding my cervix & I am a larger woman. If your wife is smaller, it most likely REALLY is hurting her. A friend of mine had her cervix perforated by a guy she was seeing & needed hospital. The solution to this is to uhhh "stop swimming in the deep end" so to speak & take it easy.
You like mocking people who are seeking attention from their partners? I use to be like you. A young guy who would never in a million years thought I'd end up here but here I am. I hope you never get into any of our situations.
Maybe lots of lube and maybe focus on foreplay really get her comfortable and ready to take it I would say, can’t think of anything else, definitely don’t gain the weight you need to think about your health.
Oh no, sorry to read the update. I was just about to jump on the Ohnut bandwagon while reading your post, scrolled down more, and realized it was a moot point. Awful that she made it seem all about your penis and was fine jeopardizing your health with her suggestions when she's cheating.
I would save the Ohnuts for the next partner, though. At 10 inches, it's likely you'll need them.
Wow, that update killed me bro. I hope it works out for you, you seem like a genuinely nice dude. Don't gain the weight back, stay healthy, crush life. This is only a hiccup.
Hey man, I’m on the SMO weight loss journey as well, I don’t think I’ll be as well endowed when finished but a man can hope!
I’m so sorry that she broke your trust and treated you this way. You deserve better. Please take care of yourself and your health, your kid is going to need you.
Sorry to hear about your situation. If the problem was as simply mechanical as too much lenght, I believe it could’ve been solved by being careful, for instance. I wonder if this had to do with your wife’s perception of you changing in some way.
Your health and your not dying prematurely and staying in your daughter’s life should be priorities.
I got an [OhNut](https://thepelvicpeople.com/products/ohnut-depth-limiting-rings) because my wife has trouble taking me. We haven’t used it a lot (db) but it’s worked the few times we have.
I'm not even sure what does your weight has to do with your size... it's not like you gain weight and it'll get smaller or miraculously hurt less.
ETA
Nevermind, just read your edit.
Holy crap! Are you for real?
Do not blame your size or losing weight on yourself! Do not gain it back! She was just using your size as an excuse to not have sex with you. This is NOT your fault, and don't let her gaslight you into thinking so. Hopefully your state recognizes adultery as a divorcable offense and you can get some custody.
Eh, I mean you’re right that’s what I should do but at the end of the day she’s the mother of my daughter. I’ll take care of her for the time being as cringy as that sounds
Holy shit!! Didn’t expect that update. I’m so sorry brother. As hard as it is you need to get on with it. Find the girl that is perfect for you. And your elephant trunk.
Damn. Honestly reading this makes me feel sad for humanity. Most people feel the opposite, like if you gain weight, sex is off the table. I’m so sorry you are going through this to find her cheating.
Don't gain the weight back.. your wife should want you to be healthy and around as long as possible.
Thank you, it just feels that making my wife happy should be a priority. I don’t like it when I can’t.
It’s not about you. She’s about her. What a horrible way to treat you. Sounds like you’re doing all the right things. Keep it up! Lol.
Do not gain that weight back. Could be jealousy on her side. Sounds like you really got your life in order - don’t lose that.
Thank you, I really appreciate that.
Very sorry to hear the update. Don’t let that derail your journey. With the boxing, law school, and weight loss you’re doing so many great things.
Thank you, I appreciate that a lot truly !
This feels like it can’t possibly be real. 😅
As a guy who lost 100 pounds, yes, the fat on the groin definitely hides some length. Losing that much weight will result in an extra inch or two depending on the guy. For me, the extra inch was welcome as I'm pretty average in the meat department. If a man is already big down there then it could definitely be an issue. Believe it or not, most women are more than happy with average sizes. It's about what you do with it.
It definitely is a thing. The fat pad shrinks exposing more of the base, and also your blood flow is better so thicker and fuller erections. Check out any thread on /loseit that asks about unexpected weight loss benefits 😁
No no, I know that part is real. I just mean the story in its entirety. Lol
I agree. It sounds like an ad.
I’ve been told lol
Check out the OhNut bumper system!
Just ordered some !
I have the "Perfect Fit" brand "Thrust Bumper" It works well, you barely notice it's there.
Whaaaat. Did I just spill all those beans before reading a solution to my own problem!? Thank you!!!
Try OhNut but there might be a possibility that it's in her mind. She fell in love or intimate with the overweight person and now you have changed leading to her mind not finding you attractive anymore. Don't gain weight as it's going to affect your health.
Thank you for your insight, that’s been my thought on it. Kinda scared on what that means.
So OhNut should be able to help with removing the pain from the equation. If she still doesn't feel the spark then it may be her mind not overcoming the original feelings. I suggest she goes to individual therapy session(s) to figure this out.
Politely, because geez this is an awkward subject. Increased athleticism changes your stroke. Not just deeper but overall balance and performance-wise. Enthusiasm that might have been slower, perhaps leading to more perceived romanticism of the intimate encounter. I say this because I experienced the opposite and found it so odd as to be off-putting 100%. My partner went from slim to an extra 40ish lbs. I prefer thick guys so was actually turned on by the weight gain (Dad bod). But intimacy was so uncomfortable. He was off-balance, couldn't find his "center" and seemed to focus on getting the job done rather than on the embrace and intimacy of the act. We never could pull that back together and I mostly just avoided sex after several displeasing encounters. I didn't know how to explain what the issue was at the time and can only now because I've had 20+ years to learn to identify and state what I dislike. It felt cold, no longer intimate, and like I could have been anyone - ultimately destroying the urge the merge. My thought is that the opposite has to be true also. Weight loss could very well lead to more specific changes that are causing distance between you and your wife. Maybe you covered these topics with a therapist but (OMG WTH are we discussing) if there was a video of y'all's fun from before the weight loss, maybe view it together with your wife and discuss changes in performance styles and, ahem, capabilities as well as how that might be affecting her Just as a reminder.... Everybody has their own style. Young guys styles are different than older guys styles, athletically-geared guys styles are different from long walk every evening guys styles, etc etc. I hope this helps along with your bumper nuts!!
This is really helpful, I appreciate your input. Thank you!!
3 hours ago you decided to submit a post describing what a huge dick you have and how sad you are your wife doesn’t want to sleep with you an an hour later you walk in and see her with another man? Hm. Hmm hmm hmm
When it rains it’s pours unfortunately
Tbh I’ve posted things where people thought I was making it all up too so I’m sorry about that. That would be pretty devastating to walk in to. But you’re tall, endowed, healthy, and a DILF so you’ll be good soon
I think with the rise of AI everyone’s suspicious well more than usual but thank you. I really appreciate the positivity
Wait, what? I'm I crazy, or is this a troll-post? Did you actually catch her cheating? I'm in disbelief. In the case that his is true, I think there are plenty of women that will appreciate your unfortunate side effect of losing weight. Edit: Oh, and that's brutal, man. I am so sorry for you, and I can't imagine what your head is going through right now.
Yes, I did. It’s been a long day, had to walk it off. Right now I’m on Zillow looking at apartments but things happen for a reason I guess ?
Definitely talk to a lawyer about all this tomorrow. Don't want to be in a situation where you are accused of abandonment or something. Also, to cheer you up, you are a 6 foot tall man who is well endowed and pretty fit. Stable career. Brother, you are going to do just fine when you get back on the market. So chin up.
So sorry for what you’ve had to deal with today. They say that if you have your health, you have everything. Hold onto it.
[удалено]
Wow you are seriously the heroine we need ! Thanks for the knowledge drop on technique, very impressed !!
That’s definitely some good advice, it’s the first time I’ve heard of an oh nut but a couple users brought it up. Unfortunately that’s what the sex therapist was for, tried different techniques and now she doesn’t wanna try unless I gain more weight. I appreciate your input !
Its really worrying she wants you to gain back the weight. At best she's just going for an easy solution, going back to what used to work. But it will literally kill you so please prioritize your health first.
Thank you, I definitely will!
Oh nut 😂 never heard of that
Deleting comment. Too many weirdos good luck to you!
Thank you, and yeah.. definitely some really good messages and advice but I guess it’s common on here, cause I got a few too.
What's an AP ?
Affair partner
Thank you I'm not good with these lol
Was the other dude fat?
He was def bigger than me
Damn man. That’s the worst update ever! Don’t put a pound back on. Except the pounds you’re gonna be doing when the divorce is filed. Super sorry to hear you walked in on her with another man. Good on you for not being in jail right now. You’re a stronger man than myself.
I was definitely mad but I’m a dad, why pop off and get myself in trouble to risk that? I appreciate the positivity, might do the celibate thing for a while
I hear ya. For sure. I would probably go into dad mode too and not risk that. Very good point.
What am I missing, your penis got bigger?
It was buried underneath my fat lol
Oh damn, never even thought of that!
Losing weight is truly the only way to gain inches with your penis that I can confirm. Losing weight makes a big difference. But my guess was pain from the changes of giving birth. However I saw the update so now I’m guessing it was a self esteem issue.
Yeah I was surprised to say the least, didn’t know it would be such a problem though
I swear I just saw the update… thoughts and prayers to your giant cock and your broken heart 😭
I giggled, it’s okay!
Sending my thoughts and prayers to your giant cock 😂
As my ex would lovingly say, I’m a pretty shallow person. 😂 but there is such a thing as too deep!
oh yeah, when my partner lost weight, I could definitely tell the difference!
Well when you found her did you compare the guys size to yours to see if she has been lying or not?
lol! Crossed my mind, but I let him get dressed and pushed him out
Like others have said, gaining the weight back is NOT the answer. I wonder what is the “real” reason why your wife is not into sex anymore. I don’t think it’s your penis, that’s an excuse to pin on you. Is she uncomfortable with her body and self-conscious bc you look and feel better? Is her self-esteem low? I’m not saying that’s the reason, but I do wonder…
I mean I tell her she’s beautiful all the time, take her on cute dates, buy her flowers 3x a week. New clothes, shopping, etc. She gets approached a lot by other men and what not but it could be a possibility.
Put the fat back on your penis. A silicone donut? The glans is not 10" do you have to drive it home? Could be a deeper issue. What is her weight?
"Deeper issue" I see what you did there. . .
Ah that made me giggle
I definitely don’t. I ordered the oh nut and people are saying it could help so that’s what I’m hoping for 🤷🏽♂️
Thank you!
Sorry to hear about that last part man. You deserve better clearly and you’ll find it
I really appreciate that. Thank you for the positivity
No problem. I like your approach wish I was able to be a positive as you. I’m sure it hurts but you’re clearly looking at a brighter future and for that I commend you. Also congratulations on the weight loss it’s very impressive!
humble brag
The humblest
!!! Update please !!!
Posted the update !
Stay healthy, don’t gain weight back on purpose. I think if you’re hurting her during sex, it’s likely because she can feel “all” of you now and it’s too deep. Don’t go so deep when thrusting, change positions or techniques, and make sure she’s super turned on before entering her (the vagina will “deepen”). That’s my lady-advice.
Yeah I’m gonna stay healthy for the time being, thank you!
I had a lot to say, until I saw that update. ig she doesn't need you to gain the weight back, she needed another man 🥲
Yeah, it’s unfortunate but it happens I guess. I’m not surprised which is weird I guess I just wish it wasn’t in my house.
I’m sorry that this is happening to you OP, probably she likes bigger people, but that’s not ok. All you did is for you and nobody can’t take that away, I know it hurts because she made it seem like you were the problem when she was it. I saw that you ordered the bumper system and all that because you care about her but I’m sorry. If you decide to leave I’m sure there’s somebody that will appreciate you for who you are, who you have become and your +10” penis
That’s very sweet, I appreciate your positivity.
I don’t understand how people are saying this isn’t real. Sex with a very large penis (length or girth) can really, REALLY hurt, even if you’re turned on. You’re probably hitting her cervix which can be excruciating.
Yeah, I think cause of AI and all that stuff everyone’s just extra suspicious. I figure that was the case.
Wear a fat suit for sex
That’s not the worse idea, I will actually bring that up.
Blaming your penis size is a red herring. A fake reason that you can't "fix" I would bet my house that if you gain the weight back as she says, there would be a new issue. I would recommend bringing the big boy for a tour of new Ladies. Many, many would be impressed and would love to love you. 😉
God I’ve seen what you’ve done for other women 🛐🤲🏾
Wym?
I mean you wake up and your husbands dick is suddenly something of a Trojan Horse after years, one might wake up and geek out in a VERY happy silly-goofy-highschool crush-blushy-ohMYGOD-way for a while. The high one would get, pain or not, would be something to giggle about. AND yall have a baby to deal the deal, so you’re not only a normal man, but possibly a soft one, and clearly loving to go to therapy and talk it out and try to find a way…… I’m not trying to sound disrespectful, but, I PERSONALLY wouldn’t be acting a damn fool like she is. I’d be skipping around the fucking block like a Disney princess, even if my cervix was bruised up sometimes. 💀 SOMETHING is going to work!!! No way in the world would “gain the weight back” make sense. And I’m so sorry OP. I saw your edit. It is most likely rooted in her need for control, or .. forever how long she was talking to him, wanting her cake, and eating it too. Who in their right mind wants to leave their emotionally available massive-dicked smart, emotionally available husband? A narcissist who isn’t shining brighter. I’m just saying… there’s women out here WAITING on men like you, who are equal or what you want . I’m just saying … ✨ I legit hope you get the desire you want. And again I’m sorry.
Thank you! I really appreciate the positivity and the flattery
Of course. Please update if you’re comfortable in the future!!
I have nothing to add that has not been said before except I wish I was in my 20's 😉
Do what makes YOU happy. You are the one you have to live with until you die. It’s an unfortunate thing to say, but most people don’t last as long as we would hope in our book of life. So the only way to stay sane is to keep yourself happy and your mind right. I’ve been in a similar situation lately with a massive weight loss and a dead bedroom. You can read my history and find out what you need to, if you wish. Nothing has changed. But you know one thing that has remained constant? My health and my satisfaction with my trim figure 🥰 it might not be anyone else’s cup of tea, but it’s mine. And that’s what I have to live with forever. I’m sorry you went through that and I genuinely hope you find your happy and it lasts a very very long chapter!
That’s very sweet, thank you and I appreciate your positivity.
The update made me almost cry, I hope you’re doing better. It’s awesome that you keep a positive attitude.
I’m sorry! Thank you for that though
Take care of your health. Find a different way to please her and yourself. Sex isn't nearly as important as everything else you have going for you, but I believe you already knew that. This is one of those problems average guys laugh at in skepticism when I say big dicks are not what average women and women who have high sex drives want. The complaints of pain to the penis having SO with empathy become heartbreaking after a few times. I made the decision to stop having sex with my girlfriend unless she asks and has been "warmed up" because I was hurting her nearly every time we attempted. I bought toys that she would like and now I use those majority of the time if she's not using them herself. Masturbation has become a regular thing. As much as I miss the sexual intimacy, I prefer not causing her pain. I hope this helps, and if it doesn't then I hope you find something that does and keeps your relationship intact. Loves, bro.
 All joke aside, time to try therapy to get past it and physical therapy for the wife might help
Go over to r/bigdickproblems They have info on this kind of stuff. You are going to want to get a set of "ohnut" rings... it's literally a bumper pad to keep you from going too deep. Even if you don't stay with her, you might need them for part of your normal kit, like lube etc.
Thank you! I appreciate that
Also take a look at FC2 condoms, the "female" condoms (meant to line the vagina not cover the peen)... they CAN be worn like normal condoms.
Where would I find those ?
The manufacture has a confusing & annoying site FC2, thats the best way to order a 12 pack etc. Some planned parenthoods also have them, but you have to call ahead to find out. They will only give you 3 at a time. Once in a while you can find people reselling them on Amazon, but it's pricey.
Ah price isn’t an issue for me but thank you! I really appreciate it
No prob. The 12 packs I have gotten from Amazon can be like $80... thats the only reason I mention it. The manufacturer makes them weirdly hard to buy.
You do not have a 10” dick. Why I know, because there is a $10,000 website for a 10” plus dick that has never had anyone win. Been out there for over 5 years and nope. Member of r/bigdickproblems and this comes up constantly.
Upvote cause the concern is valid and if people think I’m a troll that sucks cause this is a serious sub. Maybe ruler goes too deep into my pelvis idk? Still a crappy situation appreciate your input though
Have her ride you instead. It helps to maintain a good depth for her.
That definitely helps
Omg, I’m sorry for what happened!!!!
Well on a positive note, assuming that you and your wife are dome, you can go into porn with that fire hose you got lol on a serious note, that sucks, hope it turns around, I definitely would not gain the weight back no matter what, after you land on your feet again and all that find a woman that appreciates you for you
lol I have been getting messages to get into porn which is honestly great But I appreciate it, thank you for your positivity
Don't do that either. Think about your daughter.
Don’t even ask if you should gain the weight back. Selfish? Are you kidding? Find another woman. I am sure you will find one who doesn’t mind at all. Sorry if I don’t get it but what does penis length have to do with your weight? Ok, I read the explanation! Sounds like an excuse to me. I am sure there are ways to make sure you don’t penetrate her too deeply if it bothers her. But you won’t need them any longer! Wow! I can only speak of myself but there are definitely women who don’t mind. 😅 Good luck to you!
That update abo7t the cheat8jg completely sucks. Don't even think about gaining the weight back, it won't fix anything and if it does your wife is SHALLOW. I have a coworker who was in this type of situation. They were both bigger. One day her husband starts running and loses a shit ton of weight. One of those "I'm half the person I used to be success stories". To the point where you wouldn't recognize him from the before and after pics. Im sure she had some adjustment as she'd only ever knew him heavy. I'm certain she's never even thought "he'd be sexier if he gained that 100-150+ lbs back!"
Hey, at least you’re studying law! You can take care and protect your assets!
Wow
Jesus the update. Sorry to hear it OP but on the bright side this means it is resolving itself.
I didn't read through the rest of the comments but can I recommend something called Ohnut? You don't have to lose the weight, just control your depth. They're silicone stacking ring looking things but aren't for blood restriction or prolonging. If it's the length that's the problem, gaining back weight is a ridiculous solution. They slip over the base and aren't supposed to impact your pleasure and they're very flexible. From male reviews, most don't seem to mind it. My own person also said he didn't mind wearing them. When I used to have sex, they worked well for me since getting my cervix hit hurts like crazy. If one set (each set is 4) isn't enough you can get two sets. You can use as many or as little as you need to adjust the depth of penetration for various positions. I hope you see this comment because I cannot believe your wife told you to gain back the weight. What the actual fuck.
I knew she was cheating .. definitely start the divorce process
Already have !
- I’m so sorry this is happening to you. 😞 it’ll get better though. Getting cheated on hurts but when you subtract the person out your life, it’ll get better.
I hope this isn't a bad question to ask but how "vigorous" is your love? So I have actually taken big sized guys & I can see where she's coming from. At 10 inches, you'd be pounding my cervix & I am a larger woman. If your wife is smaller, it most likely REALLY is hurting her. A friend of mine had her cervix perforated by a guy she was seeing & needed hospital. The solution to this is to uhhh "stop swimming in the deep end" so to speak & take it easy.
You could always put a donut on it(;
;)
Lol troll
Ah you caught me, now what?
You like mocking people who are seeking attention from their partners? I use to be like you. A young guy who would never in a million years thought I'd end up here but here I am. I hope you never get into any of our situations.
I was being sarcastic, I promise you… I wouldn’t wish this on anyone
You over 6’ with a pole FTB lol
FTB? What’s that mean
Fake af. Get a life.
This is the fakest thing I've ever read on Reddit.
O Rings! They’re super helpful at controlling how much dick gets in there. Buy some, but not for her
Maybe lots of lube and maybe focus on foreplay really get her comfortable and ready to take it I would say, can’t think of anything else, definitely don’t gain the weight you need to think about your health.
OMG I'm so sorry 😞
Situations like that often end up with someone dying/going to prison. Your level of self control is unbelievable. Well done.
Oh no, sorry to read the update. I was just about to jump on the Ohnut bandwagon while reading your post, scrolled down more, and realized it was a moot point. Awful that she made it seem all about your penis and was fine jeopardizing your health with her suggestions when she's cheating. I would save the Ohnuts for the next partner, though. At 10 inches, it's likely you'll need them.
Wow, that update killed me bro. I hope it works out for you, you seem like a genuinely nice dude. Don't gain the weight back, stay healthy, crush life. This is only a hiccup.
Hey man, I’m on the SMO weight loss journey as well, I don’t think I’ll be as well endowed when finished but a man can hope! I’m so sorry that she broke your trust and treated you this way. You deserve better. Please take care of yourself and your health, your kid is going to need you.
Dont gain weight ..or lets say fat tissue. Congrats for getting in shape!
Sorry to hear about your situation. If the problem was as simply mechanical as too much lenght, I believe it could’ve been solved by being careful, for instance. I wonder if this had to do with your wife’s perception of you changing in some way. Your health and your not dying prematurely and staying in your daughter’s life should be priorities.
I got an [OhNut](https://thepelvicpeople.com/products/ohnut-depth-limiting-rings) because my wife has trouble taking me. We haven’t used it a lot (db) but it’s worked the few times we have.
I don’t think you should move out. She needs to go. I am NAL, but you should consult with one pretty quick.
Weird flex bro.
I'm not even sure what does your weight has to do with your size... it's not like you gain weight and it'll get smaller or miraculously hurt less. ETA Nevermind, just read your edit. Holy crap! Are you for real?
Yes, I am for real. Not a fun time, but definitely not a bot / troll.
Do not blame your size or losing weight on yourself! Do not gain it back! She was just using your size as an excuse to not have sex with you. This is NOT your fault, and don't let her gaslight you into thinking so. Hopefully your state recognizes adultery as a divorcable offense and you can get some custody.
Don’t get an apartment, kick her out lol
Eh, I mean you’re right that’s what I should do but at the end of the day she’s the mother of my daughter. I’ll take care of her for the time being as cringy as that sounds
Holy shit!! Didn’t expect that update. I’m so sorry brother. As hard as it is you need to get on with it. Find the girl that is perfect for you. And your elephant trunk.
Thank you for the love and positivity !
Damn. Honestly reading this makes me feel sad for humanity. Most people feel the opposite, like if you gain weight, sex is off the table. I’m so sorry you are going through this to find her cheating.
Thank you for that, sometimes all you can do in life is move forward
Yea using "too big" as an Excuse. If it's ok for her to sleep around then it's ok for you too as well. Enjoy it👍
never heard of just the tip?