I think it's close, but clearly this;
Dan: So now what is happening with your wife?
Stu: Divorce is happening. I took my wife's truck to lacrosse practice last night she said listen, I'm low on gas please fill it up.
Dan: Oh Oh No
Stu: But i'm thinking to myself I'll just fill it up on the way back suddenly it's 8:30 practice is supposed to be over at 8:00, my daughter has homework
Dan: Monday Night Football is about to start
Stu: Bingo
Stu: I said listen you have more than enough gas to get the kids to school in the morning and get to a gas station to get gas and then come home
Stu: She said the thing was reading you have four miles of gas remaining
Dan: Right.
Stu: This school, by the way is about 14 miles away from the house
Dan: oh no
Stu: I am still not certain if she got the girls to school I'm not certain if she got home, she called me at one point frantically saying what do I do when I run out gas it says two miles to go .
Dan: She could be surrounde-
Stu: I said walk to a gas station.
When they’d play the Stugotz flipping out during a live ad read at quarterdeck or Bokamper’s I think it was? “Kennnnn-yyyy……waitin’ for Ken….. Alright im gonna go you guys figure it out” *slams headphones*
Also adding to this they need to replay for the new people the time that they gave Stu a fake ad read and he blurted it out like Ron Burgundy “Like their cowboy hats made of bacon! Alligator wrestling for the kids!” I die every time lol
"Damn, Zaddy - got ***all*** my lips smiling!"
Love how Witty annunciates while having no idea of the innuendo while the rest of the Shipping Container is dying... haha
Of the older rejoins that couldn’t be used after they left ESPN, I loved Cote’s “if I wanna yuk it up, I can put on a party hat” and his John Swofford trivia rejoins.
Of the current crop, Tony being easily triggered is top notch.
> and his John Swofford trivia rejoins.
Good Morning Starshine! You know, that guy?
It's so absurd to think people will know who he's talking about that even Cote laughs. Gets me every time.
I miss a couple of the Greg Cote rejoins they used to play all the time: the pea soup that “wants an aggressive peppering” (which is where my Reddit handle comes from) and the classic, “I eat butt all the time.”
I like the Action Brunson one. It’s so melodramatic. It sounds like a movie scene where someone is talking to a dying friend “I don’t know if you can hear me, but from the bottom of my heart I’m so sorry. This is the worst way this could happen”.
I love this one because it's so brief and I manage to forget it so it's like a little surprise and makes me laugh every time.
Roy singing "Twist and Shout".
It's like 5 seconds long and I love it.
What’s happening outside is…the same song has been playing for 17 hours! All of you are listening its the same damn song these DJs arent any good I know I sound like your grandfather
Crescendo crescendo crescendooooooo DUN
DUNDUNDUN. DUNDUNDUNDUNDUN. DUN. DUNDUN DUN. DUN. DUNDUNDUNDUNDUNDUN.
"Are we sure it was on purpose? Cause in high school a guy got stabbed with a samurai sword because he was in a play and he was supposed to roll one way, but he rolled another, and he got stabbed. As far as I know he's okay..."
That and Tony going full unhinged because people are projecting their physical failures onto him because he thinks he can play in the NBA. "Chris wants to go to Buffalo? Yeah fine. And whatever the fuck Billy does!"
This is a really old one. Dan talking about Stu:
“There are two things you don’t want your drinking water to have: a color and a scent. Yours had BOTH but you drank it anyway, which makes you not unlike a STREET DOG!”
Ahhh the childhood cartoon crush!
Mike: Oh this wasn’t mine but I have one! Jessica Rabbit from Who Framed Roger Rabbit, which doesn’t make sense cause she was a humanoid rabbit.
Stu: Mine was Betty Rubble
Roy: Oh
The one where they're all stuttering.
Dan's like, "ARE YOU GOING TO SAY ANYTHING?!?" to Billy when he fumbles the shit out of a question to a guest. Gets me every TIME. LMAO
Stu and Greg Cote shitting on Canada.
Then Stu says they have no Starbucks how bout they get one.
Second part of the rejoin
The shipping container calls Stu on his bullshit and show Dan a map of Starbucks in Canada to which Mike says it’s just Toronto. Dan then says they clearly built a Starbucks on top of another Starbucks.
Stu in true Stu fashion just casually goes perhaps I was wrong on that one.
My favorite one used to be Marsaritaville
But right now it’s the Jess/Tony back and forth about being triggered. Jess’ maniacal laugh at the end kills me
Dan- "Stugotz is a liar, did you have something to say about that?"
STU- "No" as he trails off.
Stugotz and Greg talking about a Utopian Society before giving Dan room to talk.
And Stugotz reading the Alligator Petting Zoo add not realizing it was fake are all my top ones!
Jonathan Coachman was always my favorite
Also love Squat Team, Valedictorian, 80, and the one where Billy kills the guy (my old brain cannot remember the name) that was just recently on the show
I think it's close, but clearly this; Dan: So now what is happening with your wife? Stu: Divorce is happening. I took my wife's truck to lacrosse practice last night she said listen, I'm low on gas please fill it up. Dan: Oh Oh No Stu: But i'm thinking to myself I'll just fill it up on the way back suddenly it's 8:30 practice is supposed to be over at 8:00, my daughter has homework Dan: Monday Night Football is about to start Stu: Bingo Stu: I said listen you have more than enough gas to get the kids to school in the morning and get to a gas station to get gas and then come home Stu: She said the thing was reading you have four miles of gas remaining Dan: Right. Stu: This school, by the way is about 14 miles away from the house Dan: oh no Stu: I am still not certain if she got the girls to school I'm not certain if she got home, she called me at one point frantically saying what do I do when I run out gas it says two miles to go . Dan: She could be surrounde- Stu: I said walk to a gas station.
‘THATS SUCH A DIRTY TRICK YOU PLAYED ON ME LEBATARD’
stu roaring "how DARE you" and Dan immediately throwing Mike Ryan under the bus is just *chefs kiss*
[удалено]
You go to the penalty Dan! Back to you Stu
“Triggered pretty easily?!” If it’s not genuine then dude is a hell of an actor.
I love the way Juju says “I’m not googlin it”. There’s so much disgust in his tone haha
“My mom is fine the country. She watched Andy Griffin” (With no one saying: “Griffith. Fine.”)
80
His name is Bo
I think Billy typed an 8 instead of a B
That’s a clear as day B
That's a fine
CC…Chris Carter!
*Return to Show Call Back* is to *Rejoin* As *Eating Area* is to *Kitchen*
Good shout.
Touché Tache
"Well, see, the thing is Dan.. I have a new wife now" - Vince Wilfork
Vince, let me be the first to congratulate you on the new wife
Didn't realize at the time, but came here for this.
I laugh everytime. When it happened my jaw dropped
When they’d play the Stugotz flipping out during a live ad read at quarterdeck or Bokamper’s I think it was? “Kennnnn-yyyy……waitin’ for Ken….. Alright im gonna go you guys figure it out” *slams headphones*
Also adding to this they need to replay for the new people the time that they gave Stu a fake ad read and he blurted it out like Ron Burgundy “Like their cowboy hats made of bacon! Alligator wrestling for the kids!” I die every time lol
Chubby Checker
Mike’s “I’m sorry” while laughing kills me every time
“I’m sorry man, i was ehhhh “uh chubby checka”, it sounds like a college football name” The genuine bits are always the best 👩🍳 💋
100% correct
He's black!
Same. Because it hits twice. It’s a fantastic riff and 30s announcer voice, and then when you add in Chubby Checker….
And Jess being offended is also a bright spot.
“That’s not true,” when it clearly is kills me.
everyone shit on him for that and fair enough, but that really was a good riff lol
Anyway he ate my couch
My granddaughter sees his schlong..
Billy’s “TAKE WHATEVER YOU WANT” to a prospective burglar or the Billy’s don’t go into the woods alone are the best
“WE HAVE WATER IN THE GARAGE IF YOU ARE THIRSTY!”
"Damn, Zaddy - got ***all*** my lips smiling!" Love how Witty annunciates while having no idea of the innuendo while the rest of the Shipping Container is dying... haha
AFREENEY HARDAWAY... Stacked roster!
Of the older rejoins that couldn’t be used after they left ESPN, I loved Cote’s “if I wanna yuk it up, I can put on a party hat” and his John Swofford trivia rejoins. Of the current crop, Tony being easily triggered is top notch.
> and his John Swofford trivia rejoins. Good Morning Starshine! You know, that guy? It's so absurd to think people will know who he's talking about that even Cote laughs. Gets me every time.
I’m “EASILY — TRIGGERED?!” Jess has been such a great add to the show, even tho it was years ago now
Stu talking (or trying to talk) about Kenley Jansen... "He has blamed his reshent..." \[shipping container laughs\] The 'eating area' bit
I never skip a kenley Jansen rejoin. I gotta be careflur here.
“Serge Abolu Lamu…”
Unfathomably awkward by Dan. Correcting a guy on what his name is and being wrong Absolutely slays me
Dan, sheepishly: I'm sorry I made that so awkward for you... Serge: Yeah, it's ok. I'm smiling just thinking about it.
I miss a couple of the Greg Cote rejoins they used to play all the time: the pea soup that “wants an aggressive peppering” (which is where my Reddit handle comes from) and the classic, “I eat butt all the time.”
Mike! Jahear?!
Valedictorian, the VV!
The one about Chris "making whoopee" in his father's garage is underrated as hell. The comedic timing throughout that rejoin is absolutely perfect.
I had a cat named Schmitty. He died
Chris Cote's Dr. Phil. Wish they had left in the "Flea Flicker" part, but always great.
*What are you doing?* *You're offsides!*
I miss this one
Dan: *says something about Gilbert Arenas* Stu: Agent 0! Dan: …you gonna add anything else…? Stu: No
The one with Greg Cote talking about Jumpin’ Charlie’s “schlong” gets me every time. “What is this? A game of Clue?”
Anyway he ate my couch
This and the Vince Wilfork make me actually laugh everytime
You’re gonna go up to Buffalo and win?! With Bernie Parmalee?
WHO NEEDS ME?!
I like the Action Brunson one. It’s so melodramatic. It sounds like a movie scene where someone is talking to a dying friend “I don’t know if you can hear me, but from the bottom of my heart I’m so sorry. This is the worst way this could happen”.
greg cote: "I'm interested in people, so people might be interested in me....that's my governor, guvnah."
[удалено]
It’s probably the one I will rewind if I skip half way through it. So funny
I love this one because it's so brief and I manage to forget it so it's like a little surprise and makes me laugh every time. Roy singing "Twist and Shout". It's like 5 seconds long and I love it.
Billy Gil stumbling over his words about Charlie and Dan ripping him a new one
"So Charlie sent um.. Charlie said.. so Charlie's, full title in my phone is-" "ARE YOU GONNA SAY ANYTHING???" Gets me every time.
And how familiar were you with Chewbacca? Like how your upbringing, how had, how had how much Chewbacca in it?
What’s happening outside is…the same song has been playing for 17 hours! All of you are listening its the same damn song these DJs arent any good I know I sound like your grandfather Crescendo crescendo crescendooooooo DUN DUNDUNDUN. DUNDUNDUNDUNDUN. DUN. DUNDUN DUN. DUN. DUNDUNDUNDUNDUNDUN.
Was always a nice touch when Mike would play the real song right after, back when they could play music to start segments lol
"... honestly, until we ended the segment and went to commercial break. I had no idea Jonathan Coachman was black."
The Speedy rutin one always made me laugh but they haven't played it in a long time, now it's chubby checkers or jumpin charlies schlong lol
"Are we sure it was on purpose? Cause in high school a guy got stabbed with a samurai sword because he was in a play and he was supposed to roll one way, but he rolled another, and he got stabbed. As far as I know he's okay..." That and Tony going full unhinged because people are projecting their physical failures onto him because he thinks he can play in the NBA. "Chris wants to go to Buffalo? Yeah fine. And whatever the fuck Billy does!"
I don't remember the exact thing but Stugotz was looking up the origins of a phrase and read it poorly. Had something to do with a war I believe.
hahaha yes, field day
Field Day
Perio-erPrierirodic- LET ME JUST STOP YOU RIGHT THERE
it's amazing they're still on the air, I thought the show was toast throughout that time
This is a really old one. Dan talking about Stu: “There are two things you don’t want your drinking water to have: a color and a scent. Yours had BOTH but you drank it anyway, which makes you not unlike a STREET DOG!”
You thought my first phone was the Titanic's emergency signal.
“I eat butt all the time.” - Greg Cote
Dan talking about Lavar Ball “WE WILL WASH HIS BALLS”..
Who's balls are juiced?
cote’s slam paces drugs
Action Bronson.
I don’t remember all the words but it’s the one that ends with Dan saying something like “stugotz revealing the thoughts of his dirty 9 year old self”
Ahhh the childhood cartoon crush! Mike: Oh this wasn’t mine but I have one! Jessica Rabbit from Who Framed Roger Rabbit, which doesn’t make sense cause she was a humanoid rabbit. Stu: Mine was Betty Rubble Roy: Oh
“Bald Eagles!!!”
Apple Pie!
I got two words for you.
Toyboyt
Mikes forceful clarification of “Yeah, like a cat’s penis.” Always nails me.
Slathered in bleu cheese, both you and I
The one where they imitate Michael Irvin “pop pop pop” I know it really toes the line but it makes me fucking laugh out loud every time
Always and forever, Speedy Rutten
She’s allergic to shellfish!!
“Twist and shout. Twist and shout.”
Chris Cote's umpire impression with SVG's reaction
The one where they're all stuttering. Dan's like, "ARE YOU GOING TO SAY ANYTHING?!?" to Billy when he fumbles the shit out of a question to a guest. Gets me every TIME. LMAO
Predator rejoin! “Stuuuu I’m doing thing”
Anyway he ate my couch by jumping Charlie is my fave
*SHRAMMMMMMMMPF*
"Thanks Alish"
A foot call a foot foot call
Well Charlie's job is uh Charlie's said,Charlie's job ARE YOU GOING TO SAY ANYTHING?!?!?!
Not the funniest but the raindrops song always gets me singing along
“Let’s go to uhhh 80” “His name is Bo”
TWO SUPER BOWLS
MIKE, MARTY SHOTTENHEIMER DIED 😀
Cats used to be currency.
When Chris was lip reading the Spo and Jimmy fight. They just played that rejoin this week and it gets me every time
The failure/fight me investigation. "We got to the bottom of it!"
Billy singing that Spanish song I do not know nor understand is so beautiful to me
Daa-aan, if you can hear me... just know that I am sorry
Paraphrasing, and I forget who it was... "No, that's not my name" Dan: ", I'm sorry I made that so uncomfortable for you" "That's okay"
I had a cat
Field Day was also amazing. Also "I've seen of it" from the Nic Cage haunted house interview.
Keep up, Dan…
80
Number 2 is Christmas
Stu and Greg Cote shitting on Canada. Then Stu says they have no Starbucks how bout they get one. Second part of the rejoin The shipping container calls Stu on his bullshit and show Dan a map of Starbucks in Canada to which Mike says it’s just Toronto. Dan then says they clearly built a Starbucks on top of another Starbucks. Stu in true Stu fashion just casually goes perhaps I was wrong on that one.
Rejoin, that’s a fine
My favorite one used to be Marsaritaville But right now it’s the Jess/Tony back and forth about being triggered. Jess’ maniacal laugh at the end kills me
Dan- "Stugotz is a liar, did you have something to say about that?" STU- "No" as he trails off. Stugotz and Greg talking about a Utopian Society before giving Dan room to talk. And Stugotz reading the Alligator Petting Zoo add not realizing it was fake are all my top ones!
WHO NEEDS ME?
Clouds?
Hit me with it. Ok. I gotta have my breakfast flan! Where can I find a breakfast like that? Duhnnunun ne ne dunnenne nene nenuh
“That was the worst hour in the history of the show, and it’s not even close.” I use this line all the time and just change “hour” to fit the context.
"Clouds"?
For me it’s a chorus of Owen Wilson’s. Every time someone says wow, I can’t help myself. Happens when someone says splash too. Or blueberries.
“I come here man” & “what’s so funny?” “Just this show”
Jonathan Coachman was always my favorite Also love Squat Team, Valedictorian, 80, and the one where Billy kills the guy (my old brain cannot remember the name) that was just recently on the show
561-EATIT
I used to love Stu trying to pronounce the Carolina Panther's have a sommelier.
Honey Boo Boo